The Beast From (the) Haunted Cave is an old horror (It doesn’t feel like one) film that involves a group of criminals who plan to rob a town and then escape by tricking the skiing instructor into letting them stay at his cabin. After that they would make a quick getaway in their Helicopter (Or Plane, I forget at the moment, but it was definitely an aerial vehicle!) Once the monster comes in…will their plan succeed!?

Alright, let’s start off with the characters. This film had a pretty awful cast and you’ll finish the film without remembering a single name. Now the film was only a little over an hour so you didn’t get to see that characters for a very long amount of time, but it was definitely enough. If you can’t make a character interesting within the first 30 minutes of his screen time, then he’ll never get cool. Also, the film moves at a really slow pace. The first 30+ minutes is spent developing the romance between the two main characters and having the villains make small talk. The film would have been better if they could have cut out most of the romance, made the characters more likable, and also show the police taking on the monster.

That being said, let’s talk about the monster. He is easily one of the weakest monsters in movie history. This isn’t even an exaggeration folks, he can barely overpower a human. When the main monster can barely beat a human, then what can he do!? He seemed to be a of a spider-human hybrid, but he’s far too slow to be a real threat. Even when he does capture his victims, he doesn’t actually finish them off for a while. One human managed to stay alive for almost 2 days until he finally finished her off. The monster doesn’t have much of a presence in the film because he tends to stick to the shadows, but even when he steps out it’s usually not for the best.

The Beast From (The) Haunted Cave is definitely not a film that I recommend. Even if you are a big monster fan, then I recommend checking out Godzilla, Gamera, or the Beast from 20000 Fathoms. Those movies know how to show off a monster and make him a threat. This monster was no such thing and even though the film is short, you’ll find that it feels like a never ending summer blockbuster.

Overall 3/10