Category Archives: Live Action Movie Reviews

Captain America: Brave New World Review

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It’s time for the 4th Captain America film. Of course Steve Rogers is dead so in this case it’s about his successor Sam Wilson who has let go of his old Falcon persona. This is a good film but definitely one that drags out quite a bit near the middle and that’s not good because this isn’t a particularly long film in the first place. The film has a running joke which I think is even a bit meta about how Sam should have taken the super soldier serum and honestly…he should have. It would have helped quite a bit.

The movie starts off with Sam and his sidekick Joaquin taking down a bunch of terrorists and securing a package that had been stolen. He is thanked by the president elect Ross. After a timeskip, Ross has become the president and he is attempting to seal a treaty with Japan over the use of Adamantium. It is a material that may even be stronger than Vibranium and would have a whole lot of uses. Ross is trying to move on from his dark past and be the best president that he can be, but it won’t be easy. A figure from his past has appeared and is attempting to sabotage all relations with Japan. Can Ross put an end to this?

It was nice to see Ross return because I always thought he was a pretty fun character. Definitely on the gruff side and he had a tendency to do things that weren’t exactly legal but he was always fighting for his country. Now as the president Ross brings that same level of grit to the job. As the film goes on he starts to look a little shakier though. After we get through all the twists and such, I can say that he definitely made one too many mistakes here. It was still fun to root for him, but he really sabotaged himself completely.

When you make a mistake you have to deal with it. Ross decided to just ignore it and naturally that comes back to bite. So he does really good in all of the present actions but that was enough to really hurt him. Meanwhile you can also say something similar for the main villain here. This mysterious villain has a grand master plan and could have easily completed it if not for his ego. This guy really wants everyone to know that he is the one behind this plot and so naturally that leads to him being captured.

It just feels a bit absurd that a so called super genius could not find a better way to do the plan without being captured in the process. Maybe he plans to escape and that’s another plan but that’s way too risky. The villain never ended up being very impressive for me and I also thought that they really messed up his design compared to what it was in the comics. That look was 100X better than this one which is really going for more of an intentionally ugly design.

As for Sam, he does a good job as Captain America here. He certainly looks better than in the Winter Soldier miniseries where it almost felt like you were meant to root against him. Sam tries to do his best to help the country out while not becoming some yes man to a guy as dubious as General Ross. Sam’s also dealing with a lot because his old friend Isaiah goes crazy for some reason and Sam needs to figure out a way to prove his innocence.

Throughout this adventure, characters are quick to doubt him as well. The villains make fun of him, Ross compares him negatively to Steve, etc. I do think it would be good for Sam to finally get past the self confidence issues though so hopefully after this he won’t be wavering anymore. It is just tough to see that he is still just a human with tech though. It works for someone like Iron-Man who is surrounded by nanotech and that’s always been his thing. Being Captain America without the actual super strength? That’s a lot tougher.

It also does limit what the film can do in terms of fight scenes. The final battle relies on an enormous amount of plot armor and nerfing the opponent so that Sam can have a chance. It’s really hard to pull off that kind of a fight without making one party look worse than they should. As for how you solve that, well you have to give Sam some serious powers. Otherwise even fighting humans can be tough for him. He was getting absolutely clobbered by one villain near the beginning of the film. Sam is only able to win with a lucky shot near the end but effectively lost that battle. Then he has a really close shave against a guy with a gun. Yeah that guy is the head of Serpent and is skilled but is technically still just a guy.

If you’re having close shaves with all kinds of normal fighters like this then you’re not really going to be able to go toe to toe with super powered villains. Joaquin made for a good sidekick and while he is much weaker since he is a human with worse tech, he does good against the side opponents. He’s not really ready for the bigtime but the film isn’t trying to put him in those situations so it works out.

We’re introduced to a new character named Ruth here who is a former Black Widow. As a result she is fairly strong and can fight well despite her short stature. Her inclusion felt a bit random compared to the rest of the characters but it’s always good to have another fighter at the ready. This film was really trying for a more grounded approach which is why you have so many street level fighters running around here. It’s also why the climax feels especially out of left field because the power levels have such a huge jump. It’s not like it’s a spoiler to say who it is since the film was advertising him a lot but I’ll still abstain there.

So we’ve got a lot of action scenes and everything. Why isn’t the film higher? Well, the writing and action are good as always and I enjoy the general tone of the film. It just moves a bit too slowly and takes some of the war stuff more seriously than is needed. For example we get a fairly long dog fight of Sam trying to chase some jets and based on the speed we saw from him early on this should be easy. Instead the chase overstays its welcome by quite a lot and just doesn’t really get that interesting.

Towards the middle a lot of time is spent on the mystery of why people are going insane. The problem is that as the viewer you know who it is early on and Sam/Ruth find out the method for the hypnosis right away. So then the real mystery is tracking down the assailant but it wasn’t a great journey to get there. None of it is bad but I feel like there really isn’t much in the way of replay value here. You’re glad you saw the film and it kept your attention but that’s about it. I dare say the film is essentially filler in terms of future developments and even the final post credits scene is rather halfhearted. It is just so vague that it is essentially meaningless. I would have gone for something a bit more hype like actually showing a guest star.

Overall, Brave New World didn’t exactly shatter the sky in terms of hype but it is a good film. I enjoyed it and the MCU always does have a fun style of banter and action scenes. The choreography is good and I dare say that was never in doubt. It’s just a fun movie all the way but ends up being a bit more forgettable and the film also has a hard time trying to balance the fun and serious moments. I dare say it should have just leaned more on the fun and being a comic book movie. We’re pretty deep in the MCU so by this point it should be able to get as fantastic as possible. I’d also say that keeping a certain guest star around for the climax would have been a really good idea because otherwise it just felt a bit pointless. We’re getting closer and closer to Doomsday so I look forward to seeing how the next films go.

Overall 6/10

Rooster Cogburn Review

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Rooster Cogburn is one of those titles where you would have no idea what the film is about. It’s such a general name but hardcore fans of True Grit will know that this is a western right away. This title plays it very safe and ends up being a decent western title. You’ll either appreciate the subtlety it is going for or you’ll end up finding it to be a bit boring. There’s not going to be much in between. For me I thought it did a pretty good job. It’s not terribly exciting but keeps your attention well enough and also avoids some of the classic western issues.

The movie starts off with Roster taking down some more thugs but he is called into court. Unfortunately the town has decided to move in a more nonsensical direction and does not want to see Rooster murdering criminals anymore. Rooster is stripped of his badge and forced into retirement which has him feeling rather bitter. Naturally the judge and the town quickly realize that they are doomed without Rooster as a group of bandits steal some powerful nitro. The town is forced to call Rooster back in for one more adventure. Is Rooster too old to deal with these guys?

Right away you can see how absurd the town is though. The fact that they were so quick to fire Rooster was crazy. Now Rooster is no saint. The guy gets drunk way too often and has slowed down a step but it would have been nice if the town could have found some real examples to call him out on. The self defense shooting we saw at the beginning of the film was completely justified. If Rooster didn’t shoot then he would have been dead. That’s just how it worked back in the wild west and the town looks naïve to think otherwise.

Rooster was right to be sore at how he was quickly fired like this. He showed no remorse and that’s a good thing because he didn’t make any mistakes there. The rest of the deputies are so scared that none of them even want to accompany Rooster so he goes off on a 1 vs 9 kind of fight. That’s basically unwinnable to be honest.

It turns out that he won’t be completely alone though as he runs into Goodnight and a kid named Wolf. They are the last survivors after the same group of thugs stopped by their house and murdered everyone. Goodnight is certainly no big fan of violence but is no damsel and ends up joining the adventure with her gun. Wolf is a bit too young to be super helpful but is still around to cause distractions as needed.

It’s a real team effort and from here we get a lot of banter with Goodnight and Rooster. The writing is pretty solid in general and their dynamic ends up working well. Goodnight is definitely right that Rooster lets himself go too much with all the drinking and tries to help him be more introspective. I don’t think it really works as I feel like Rooster really doesn’t listen to anybody but at least he warmed up to having her around.

Goodnight has a lot of brave scenes like when she stands up to the thugs as well as saving Rooster from one shot. She’s definitely a solid heroine through and through. Wolf is okay but tends to forget how young he is and tries helping a little too much. That may not sound like a negative but sometimes you really do need to take your own power level into account or you just end up getting into a whole lot of trouble.

The villains are more on the forgettable side. There is a whole lot of infighting which helps the odds for Rooster. One of the main villains is a turncoat who used to work with the sheriff. He is an expert at explosives and helps in using the nitro. He’s clearly a cut above the rest of the lackeys but at the same time is still afraid of the main villain. The main villain really has a strong chokehold on his whole group and is always threatening or murdering them. He really never stops.

There is a decent amount of action here as we get several fight scenes. They’re all handled well but it feels like the villains have a whole lot of plot armor at times. Rooster and his crew get the drop on them initially but don’t end up picking off a single one. Yes, Rooster’s first shot was a warning one since he is trying to take them in alive but after that he should have been landing direct hits. These guys are all dangerous murderers after all and Rooster has always ignored the town’s orders before. It felt like too many shots were just being missed.

I suppose that’s a factor in all westerns though. This one just felt like it stood out a whole lot though. Still we got a solid climax here and the whole film is handled well. The writing was the most important part of course and the pacing was also good. The film’s main appeal is probably for when you want to show someone a western without it being too gritty. Despite being a sequel to “True Grit” there is absolutely nothing gritty about this adventure.

Overall, This is a very safe film that doesn’t really make any mistakes. The fights are good and I liked the dynamic between the two leads. The movie could have probably given the traitor more to do which would have led up to another solid fight. I enjoyed the villain cutaways with all of the dysfunction over there but it didn’t ultimately lead to a whole lot. This film isn’t super long or anything but there was enough runtime to add on another subplot. It just doesn’t have much of a hook so the movie is good but you won’t be thinking about it much afterwards. I guess it’s the definition of a good popcorn action film.

Overall 6/10

Can’t Buy Me Love Review

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Can’t Buy Me Love is one of those romance films where you’re waiting for some kind of twist ending to save it. For example maybe something that prevents the main duo from getting together and the film decides to be a bit subversive about it all. Unfortunately that didn’t happen and this ends up being one of those films that will just have you shaking your head the whole time. There isn’t much to salvage about this one.

The film starts by introducing us to Ronald who is your typical nerd character. He’s extremely introverted and has not been able to get popular at school. He secretly wants to be like the cool guys and go to all the parties/get a girlfriend. One day he sees that his next door neighbor Cindy is in a jam because she ruined her mother’s expensive dress. It will cost $1,000 to buy a new one which is a lot of money for that time period. Ronald offers to buy it for her on the condition that she pretends to be his girlfriend for a month. Cindy is under duress right now because she’s really worried about what her mother will say, so she reluctantly agrees. This will now be the toughest month of her life.

So right away there are a bunch of problems with this premise. Yeah I get how you can get a lot of comedic situations out of this. It’s a classic type of plot that has been done many times before but this situation was not a good move. The fact that Cindy was super pressured into doing this was crazy. It’s much better done in a film like Summer Wars where one character said yes to be nice and there was no blackmail happening.

Now it does set Ronald up as an antagonist right away. He’s willing to go quite far in order to move ahead and the film will even surprise you with how degenerate the guy is. Ronald is the kind of guy who lets the power get to his head immediately. The movie also shows how he doesn’t even see Cindy as real girlfriend material because when she starts to fall for him, he doesn’t even acknowledge it. Yeah maybe he’s a bit oblivious but pair that with all of the future scenes and it makes sense.

He just wants to live a life without morals where he can have relations with whoever he wants. This is not true boyfriend material in the slightest. Ronald also betrays his friends. Not even in a subtle way like eating at a different table, but completely ignoring them, messing up his best friend’s house, etc. The betrayal is quite extreme and then he gets with quite a number of girls before the film’s over. Ronald just goes all the way in each instance and doesn’t know how to have any restraint. The ability to do anything doesn’t mean that you suddenly go and take advantage of every opportunity.

If anything the new status just exposed his true personality. So this guy was a real bad apple for sure and the ending is not deserved. He should have just been totally isolated as a repercussion for what he did. That would have evened out pretty well if you ask me.

Then you have Cindy who isn’t exactly the best character either. I do want to confirm straightaway that she is many times better than Ronald though. Cindy has a lot of status within the school as the top cheerleader and never let it go to her head. She’s just a bit spoiled like when she took her mom’s dress when she was explicitly told not to do that. So Cindy really set herself up for a lot of trouble here. There’s no reason why she should have agreed to Ronald’s demands though because she actually has a long distance boyfriend.

Now that boyfriend doesn’t seem like a great guy but you still can’t be pretending to cheat on him in front of the whole school. That’s a quick way to destroy the reputation of all parties involved. Additionally she is just way too forgiving. This is partially because of how the film had to end out but it was a real shame to see her just absorb all the abuse Ronald threw her way. He did not hold back at all in trying to make her look bad and was quick to cut her down.

He’s the kind of guy who will take anything you share in confidence and blow it up in your face. So if you have any self respect then you’re not even going to be friends with someone after that. Definitely one of the worst romances I’ve seen in a while. This also takes away from the comedic potential of the film. Officially this is meant to be part comedy and you can see all of the jokes that are slipped in but it tends to be a little too mean spirited to actually have fun with.

It’s almost spiteful with how it all plays out. This is like a power fantasy for an introverted person but written from someone who thinks that popularity is inherently bad. Ronald also comes across as being whiny here because it’s not like he was completely alone. He had quite a few friends and they would even play games together at night. They were real friends and then he had a good reputation in the neighborhood like how Cindy’s mom thought he was a responsible young man. He traded that all in and I’d say that speaks volumes about him.

There’s so much more you could say about the romance in general but you get the idea. For a romance to work you need both characters to be solid but as the title went on everyone just looked bad. The worst part is that Cindy made a good faith effort from the start with helping Ronald learn how to dress for success. Then she came up with a good cover story and everything but Ronald was quick to just take everything too far. I suppose he didn’t have great family influences. His parents let his younger brother constantly bully him but of course that whole subplot was also embarrassing for the main character. Surely he can handle some banter with a little kid right?

Overall, This is not a film that I would recommend. It gets way too dramatic and mean spirited the whole time. Definitely a film that will not go down as one of the better ones and I can see why it has been forgotten to time. The film needed major work in order to even be decent. You definitely have to start by fixing the general premise of the film so it starts off a bit lighter and then you shouldn’t make Ronald a total jerk. There are so many ways to make the film fun and you can keep him oblivious without making him a total antagonist. Then you can actually focus more on the comedy. Like there was one funny joke where Ronald’s friends try to enter the party but immediately sit back down when they’re called out. Of course it was hard to be sympathetic to them either since they were girl crazy as well. That’s got to be one of the worst stereotypes. They should be focused on games or something. If they really want to get out there, then they should be going to the gym or something. I gotta just try and focus on the comedy….

Overall 3/10

My Dinner with Andre Review

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It’s time for a very dialogue heavy film. Just about the whole movie is about a single conversation so it doesn’t really get much more dialogue heavy than that right? Well it’s a pretty interesting concept but you really need the conversation to play out more like a debate in order to be interesting. Sure, there are plenty of podcasts where the hosts agree and it’s still interesting but then the topic needs to be on point. A debate is the easiest way to go about things and unfortunately the film completely fumbled the premise.

The movie starts off with Wally heading over to the restaurant where he will be meeting with Andre. The two of them used to be close friends but drifted apart over time to the point where Wally is really not looking forward to this dinner. His fears appear to be founded as the two characters are not on the same page. Although Andre clearly seems to think that they are closer than they actually are. Andre talks about his adventures in travelling across the world and how bleak the future is. Wally doesn’t agree with some of these thoughts but how can he gets his views across? Wally isn’t the most outgoing sort of guy after all.

I think Wally’s timidity is the biggest problem here. In a good back and forth you need to have two characters who are really ready to duke it out. It doesn’t have to mean that there is any bad blood here, you just have to have some passion behind your ideas. That’s how it goes on just about any debate on First Take or if you watch any of the Youtube debaters. Most of them tend to get rather toxic but then off camera they are all hanging out.

I would have had this film be a really fiery debate between the two of them, only to have them shake hands and walk home after that. Show that they can separate the debate from their friendship. Instead Wally basically gets obliterated for the entire 2 hours. Towards the end he finally starts trying to counter Andre but gets way too nervous and is shut down in each of his attempts. This was a one sided massacre from Andre’s side and the guy really didn’t hold back.

The debate is mainly about fulfillment in life and what it takes to have a happy one. Andre for example has lived his life in an adventurous way. He travels across the planet and has had all kinds of crazy experiences. Whether you believe him or not if up to you but it has shaped his views on humanity. Nearly dying helped him see how people have just stopped trying. They don’t have drive anymore and just flow through life without a purpose. He thinks that people need to live in some level of discomfort in order to stay creative and keep on going. If they don’t then they will inevitably grow to be very weak and will not have any future hopes and dreams.

Wally leads a rather mundane life with his 9-5 and has been struggling to get a break lately. Yet, he does think there is some satisfaction to be had in this kind of life. He tries to say that maybe visiting the local drug store is the same as going to Mount Everest and while the guy is grasping at straws, I was glad to see him giving some good ideas. Unfortunately he just never ends up being all that convincing. Perhaps because in a way Wally seems to be trying to convince himself of this at the same time while Andre clearly has a whole lot of conviction in his own beliefs. It’s always going to be hard to challenge someone when you aren’t exactly sure of what you are debating.

The worst part is that I technically agree with Wally’s ideals more than Andre’s. You should be able to enjoy the modern conveniences of life and it definitely doesn’t take away from you. Andre seems to think that you have to closely inspect every part of your life each day in order to make sure that you’re still happy when that’s really going overboard. This just hurts Wally even more though because it feels like he is losing a debate when he has the winning position.

It’s like when I watch a debate where the flat earther is destroying the round earth debater. Obviously the world is round so that means the second guy has the massive advantage so to lose that debate anyway is crazy. I saw another debate recently with a big conspiracy theorist fighting someone took the mainstream perspective on what happened with the Charlie Kirk assassination and the conspiracy theorist actually won. I always feel like you lose extra points when you are defeated in a debate where you have a massive advantage right from the start.

Now a one sided beatdown can be a lot of fun but you still need there to be some resistance. So Wally is the biggest reason as to why the film wasn’t very good. Additionally I would also say that the topic just wasn’t that interesting. An existential debate like this can still be decent under the right circumstances but it ended up being more boring than anything. I was really expecting a lot more out of this one. I suppose it does show how creating a film around a long conversation like this can be harder than expected though.

At least the venue was a fancy restaurant so I get to dunk on those again. My theory that “the cheaper a food item is, the better it will taste” continues to bear fruit. Now there are going to be limits to this but this restaurant for example probably had absolutely crazy prices and the portions were small. The soup looked as clear as possible without any real flavors. Yeah that’s always going to be a big problem when you think about it. I did think that the waiters made for decent supporting characters as they got more and more annoyed with how long the two characters were taking to leave the venue.

Overall, This is the kind of film that is being very straightforward with its premise. The film is about a long conversation between a guy who lives an adventurous life and one who has settled down to lead a more ordinary one. They get to talk about their perspectives and the current state of humanity. If the conversation sounds interesting and you don’t mind one guy getting 90% of the dialogue, then it could be a winner for you. If that isn’t your cup of tea or you were hoping for something more contentious then you should skip this one. At the end of the day the biggest limitation here is that the film can just be rather boring for most of the run.

Overall 3/10

Drop Review

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Now this was a tricky film for me to think about. I wasn’t even fully decided on how much I liked it when the movie ended. On one hand, it does handle the thriller aspects pretty well with a lot of suspense and everything. On the other hand the film’s entire plot revolves around everyone being slow on the uptake. It’s even worse when one guy is clearly tech savvy and then you have the fact that the film can be extremely cringe. It’s intentional….but cringe is cringe after all. So lets unpack this one.

The movie starts off by introducing us to Violet who had a traumatic experience with her ex-husband. Violet was able to piece her life back together after those events and is now a therapist who helps others with their problems. She has done her best to be the best single mom possible for her kid and now she is ready to get back out there and rebound with a new person. Violet simply doesn’t want to be single forever and she will be meeting up for the first time with someone that she met on an app. His name is Henry and they will be meeting as a super expensive, fancy restaurant for the first meetup. She gets there early and everything seems fine….until she starts getting some dangerous messages through wireless drops. This mysterious individual claims to have her son hostage and she must now follow all of his orders. How can she gets out of this situation?

Okay so lets address the elephant in the room. Violet should have immediately tuned the feature off. It’s not like air dropping is something that goes through no matter what. Just turn it off immediately! It takes a while before the messages mention that he has her kid so the whole film would have had to play out very differently. The film also goes out of its way to show that Henry knows how the air drops work. He explains it to Violet and even has apps on his phone that measure distance and everything. So he should have just told her how to turn it off. It’s a bit hard to get past this point since it is the crucial sticking point for the entire film. You’ll just be shaking your head the whole time. It’s not the kind of thing that would really hurt the film’s score for me but is a bit of a strike against the writing.

Well once we get past that, it does make for a decent mystery gimmick as Violet needs to find out who is sending the messages. That might sound pointless since it doesn’t change the hostage situation but I guess you could say it’s so that she can find some blindspots to contact the police. Unfortunately the villain has hacked all of the cameras so he can basically see her from everywhere. I will say that even here the film stretches some disbelief. Not so much in the hacking as we’ll say that the villain is just that powerful but that nobody talked about how he was constantly texting. There is a plot reason why this feels pretty unlikely and you would have heard something.

Thrillers tend to have a lot of disbelief attached to them but this one just felt particularly egregious. Now you have to remember that this is all happening during Violet’s first date. So that’s where the second hand cringe comes in as she keeps looking away to scan the perimeter, is super distracted, etc. Henry comes across as ultra patient with how long he hangs in there because I think most people would have given up early on. It would just be too much after a bit and nobody wants to be second fiddle in their own date. The person giving her the orders intentionally does it in a way to make her look as bad as possible.

She is still able to keep Henry interested with various tricks but that shouldn’t have been enough. Now, we do get some info on Henry about how good he is with tech and his background involves the government so he should be able to notice that something is wrong. I was actually expecting it the whole time but instead he seems to take it at face value that Violet is just kinda crazy. Surely the whole air drops thing should have been a good tipoff. Henry seems like a nice guy so I’m not going to go too hard on him but I just expected more there.

The film gives us a more explosive climax than I was expecting. It’s always nice to get some action in there even if it feels like the deck was too stacked in the villain’s favor. There was no realistic way for him to lose. Special props to Violet’s sister for hanging in there and doing her best as a babysitter. Nobody expects to have to fight for your life in that job but she pulled through and did what was needed. While the last scene in the film is for laughs and shouldn’t be taken too seriously….I did think that she deserved a bit more recognition. The joke just didn’t land tbh since Violet should be thanking her a whole lot. You’ll understand the context when you watch the film.

I really enjoyed the backgrounds and locale for the film. The restaurant looked really nice even if the food/drinks would probably not be so great. The annoying waiter would also hurt the experience there. That was one area where the film was trying way too hard to be funny. I think the humor there was the fact that he wasn’t funny so it was like a 4 layered joke but it just didn’t work. After a point it just loops around to not being funny again. At least the date being awkward makes sense in context but the waiter did not need to be here at all.

Also this may be a bit harsh but I didn’t think the backstory for Violet was necessary or even that it made a lot of sense. The villain uses it against her later on by saying that she has murdered people before and all that but when we see the context it is the biggest stretch ever. I know survivor bias is a real concept but usually that’s not mixed in with self defense. In a case like this I don’t see why Violet would have any real fears or trauma. Or more specifically, I can see it being a trauma in terms of not wanting to be near guns or being afraid to start dating again but not in any relation to taking a life. I would have rewritten it a bit to make her actually shoot the gun in which case I think it would have been a much stronger parallel. It would also establish that she is willing to take a life in order to protect her son and so to the viewer, maybe she would take more and more lives to continue keeping him safe. It’s still different since that was self defense and not murder but the way the film used this plot was a bit odd.

So in the end what are we looking at here? Is this still a good film or do all of these factors add up to make it a bad one? I was pretty indecisive throughout it all but by the end the answer became clear. This one is a good movie and so it makes it into the green. It’s not a film that I would likely rewatch on my own but I wouldn’t be opposed to it if someone else picked the movie. I also wouldn’t caution people away from watching it and may even recommend it to a fan of thrillers. I’d say the premise is better than the execution but it still got enough things right.

I also liked how the final boss started monologuing before going out. For a minute there I didn’t think we were going to have enough time for the ole speech. Even then we got another awkward conversation as Violet started trauma dumping and the villain clearly couldn’t care less but didn’t seem to know what to do in the moment except to keep eating his dessert.

Overall, Drop is a pretty memorable film and I think that is a strong point. I don’t regret seeing it or anything like that. Thrillers like this can be fun to think about what you would do in this situation. Once the orders begin coming in, it is really hard to get the upper hand again. You know that the villain isn’t bluffing after all but if you keep helping out there is still no guarantee that he will keep his word. For that reason I always think the best thing to do is to ignore the orders but obviously that is much easier said than done.

Overall 6/10

The Marvels Review

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The Marvels is one of those films that faded away pretty quickly but I did always enjoy the concept of what it was going for. It was a crossover for the main character of the movie Captain Marvel with the main character of the show Ms. Marvel along with one of the supporting characters of Wandavision. You can only really pull off that many crossovers when you’ve already got an expanded cast. That said, the power levels are very different among the 3 and for once that would be a bit of an issue. You would need to set up a threat weak enough for Monica and Kamala to fight which would mean nerfing Carol a bunch. And….that’s exactly what happened but on the whole I would say this was still a pretty good movie.

The title starts off quickly with the Kree getting their hands on the cosmic band. They are now led by Dar who seeks revenge on Carol for essentially causing a war which ruined her people. Her solution is to wipe everyone out to really stick it to Carol rather than prioritizing a fix for her people. Usually this would be an easy threat for Carol to stop considering how she was easily overwhelming Thanos. Unfortunately her powers have begun to go out of control so every time she uses them, she switches places with Kamala or Monica. Not a great way to stay focused during a fight.

The power swapping leads to some cool teamwork combos and is also a funny gag. So it was used for some positive things throughout the movie but I do have to be honest about how annoying it could be as well. I really wanted to see Carol just crushing her opponents instead of constantly being thrown out of the fight. She could have ended this movie in seconds otherwise. Honestly even with this gimmick she should have done better in the fights. In particular during the climax when she is fighting against Dar. Suddenly she just wasn’t looking as strong as normal and this continues until the very ending when she gets to ram Dar into deep space. It’s clear that working with a character this powerful was not easy for the film.

Carol has come a long way since her trainee days and it’s nice to see her taking charge throughout the movie. Kamala and Monica are new to the whole saving the world thing and so Carol is the one who really has to take charge and lead them. I’ say she did a good job of it too. Then we have Monica whose grudge with Carol feels a bit petty. Grudge may be the wrong word for it since part of the awkwardness is just Monica not really knowing how to talk to her. Still, the stakes are a bit too high for all of that right now.

I also think she should have been training with her powers a whole lot prior to the film’s events. She seemed to still be getting used to her abilities but enough time has passed from Wandavision where she should have a handle on them. Same for Kamala. During the opening fights she seems to be having a hard time and then by the end she is using the constructs like a pro. Part of Kamala’s entire character is that she really likes heroics and looks up to Captain Marvel as her hero. Surely that’s a lot of incentive to have been training all this time. I guess everyone was off their game though, even Nick Fury was having some trouble with random goons.

It might come down to the film just having more of a cheery tone than some of the other titles. This one feels more like a quick TV special than a full on movie. That’s not really a bad thing as it makes for a comfy watch. Part of why I enjoyed the film is it feels like an episode of superhero television, just in live action. Sometime you can pick up and watch for some fun without getting invested into a real end of the world plot. Maybe I wouldn’t feel as excited if I saw this one in theaters since it’s pretty short but the quality was there.

Also, power level issues aside, I thought Kamala made for a good character. I liked her enthusiasm and she was a great contrast to the other characters who were definitely not going to be as cheery. After all being a superhero should be really fun. It isn’t always sunshine and flowers of course but having powers seems like it would be super fun. So it was nice to have one character just enjoying the journey.

Now one other issue about the film being so happy is that it does have to gloss over some of the more serious details of the film. For example Carol forces the other heroes to leave a planet while tons of innocents were still there. Kamala wanted to save them but is overruled and the body count was rather massive. Usually you’d expect a full argument about this and a lot of back and forth but Kamala continues to idolize Carol and doesn’t dwell on it too much. I thought that was a little too easy. It’s a really serious decision and there should have been some pushback.

Carol was right in that moment that they couldn’t save everyone but with her powers she certainly could have saved many more. Kamala should have grilled her on that and it should have been a cause for tension for a while. A good example of this disillusionment would be what happened with Shazam and Superman in Justice League. Having a moment shatter the image of your hero is a big deal. So the film should have really stayed on that more.

Even the fact that a ton of the Kree died indirectly due to Carol’s actions from the first film should have been dwelled on more. Sure, Dar is mainly using that as an excuse but it’s an interesting plot point. I would argue that Carol had no way of knowing the effects she would cause and also didn’t have many options at the time since the supreme intelligence was evil. It’s like when you take down a dictator and now the innocents suffer due to the chaos at the top. It’s something you try to mitigate but doesn’t change the fact that the dictator had to be taken down.

As for Dar, she’s not a very compelling villain at all. She tends to get the shaft in this film with how fast it goes. Her motives are pretty basic and there isn’t much to her fighting style. So nothing really makes her standout. The film itself isn’t the most forgettable but most of the memorable parts will not include her. The prince from the musical kingdom probably ends up leaving more of an impact. She is powerful to be sure but that’s it. Dar essentially works as a living obstacle to the heroes.

The musical planet was a fun little subplot though. It’s an example of a joke that was done pretty well and did not overstay its welcome. If the scene had been 10 minutes longer then I’d probably be shaking my head but it was short enough to work. Then we had the scene of the cats eating everyone which was decent but in context I don’t think it works super well. The fact that everyone was running for their lives was a bit crazy. I think at least half of them would have in theory taken this in stride and running off would just burn a lot of time that the heroes didn’t have. Also with how the cats would randomly spit the objects out, I’m not sure how much I would trust the plan.

Overall, The Marvels was pretty good. It’s not really going to stand out because this feels like a fairly generic adventure. The heroes aren’t really taking the stakes too seriously and they’re so much stronger than the villains that we need a whole energy plot device to prevent them from ending the film too quickly. I don’t think a lack of ambition is a big enough reason to say that a film is bad though. Ultimately it was still fun which is the important part. There were no really bad scenes and the writing was good enough. I thought the banter worked pretty well and since the film was playing it super safe, it’s not like it was going to be making any big mistakes. The post credits scene is more interesting than exciting. I would have chosen almost any other guest star character from the team to make the scene a lot better but I’l still take it. This is seemingly a pretty important scene. So if you enjoy a classic superhero team up then you should check this movie out.

Overall 7/10

Moonstruck Review

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Oh no it’s time for one of those messy romance films where everyone is cheating on each other. Obviously a romance is going to automatically be a bad one when there is cheating involved because that isn’t true love. Cheating immediately shows that there is a rebound and that neither character can be trusted. They have broken their word and honor by engaging in the act right from the start. Even if it’s meant to be a way to show how dramatic these adventures can be or to try for a jaded sense of realism, that’s not going to be enough to save this. It is absolutely possible to have a film that is good in spite of the characters being terrible but this was not that kind of film.

The movie starts off with Loretta finally getting proposed for marriage by her boyfriend. She has been waiting for this moment for a long time after her first marriage fell apart. This is really her chance in order to land a man before she has become too old. Johnny is excited as well but he has to go on a work trip for a while so he heads on out. Unfortunately this gives time for his brother Ronny to show up and this guy falls for Loretta right away. He is determined to get her and unfortunately her willpower may not be all that strong. Can she stay loyal to Johnny?

Well obviously she doesn’t and I wouldn’t even call that a spoiler because she doesn’t even last 5 minutes. Instead she tries to just say they should forget about it and her strategy is to hang out with Ronny but not let things get too serious. It’s a terrible plan right from the start to be honest and she was just being in denial. Once you’ve already crossed the line then there is no way back out. You just have to accept the fact that you’re a terrible person and retreat from all relationships. Johnny certainly didn’t deserve his and keeping it a secret would also be a terribly toxic way of handling things. Loretta was just a really terrible character all the way through. Ronny takes a ton of blame as well but I always put more on the person who is actually in a relationship.

Obviously Ronny broke the unspoken rules about not dating someone who is already dating a family member. He also shouldn’t be going after women who are taken and so there was no saving this character either. Just a poor character all the way through. The only correct option for him would have been to stay away from Loretta. Even if he truly fell head over heels in love with her, e was simply too late and just has to accept that.

Meanwhile Loretta’s father Cosmo is also a terrible character all the way as he decides to cheat on his wife the whole time. She handles this a little too calmly as well by just telling him to stop and things will be fine but he is taking all the blame here for being the one to start the cheating relationship. The guy wasn’t even sorry that he did it, just that he was caught.

Johnny is mostly innocent in all of this but then looks absolutely terrible in accepting the circumstances at the end of the film. A betrayal like this is not something that you just accept and cheer on. The whole ending is laughably bad and while I think that is part of the whole point of the ending, it still makes you shake your head. Johnny wimping out was ultimately for the best as he would have been in a terrible relationship but that’s only with knowledge from being outside the film. From in-universe it is just a bad look all around.

There really aren’t any good characters here. At least Loretta’s mother resisted the advances of one guy who tried to get with her but she was definitely playing with fire by eating with him in the first place. There is nothing wrong with having friends even once you’re married but you really need to be very smart about each interaction. You have to be able to read the other person and make sure that they aren’t going to try and make a move on you because at that point it would be too late to do anything about that. It’s easy to say you have too much willpower to do anything until it ends up happening. I wouldn’t trust any of the characters in this film at all.

In short there just weren’t any really strong elements to the film. Their conversations tended to be on the annoying side and are the kinds of dialogue that just ruin the reputation of romance itself. Characters settling because they are getting old, cheating just so that they can postpone death, etc. It’s basically a combination of all the worst tropes about romance and what some people think it is all about. I definitely tend to prefer the more idealistic version of romance with true love and each person never falling for a rebound. That’s how it is supposed to work after all and this film just wasn’t able to understand that. A relationship is about pure trust and pure love. If you’re settling or still checking out the market afterwards then it’s a bad romance definitionally.

Overall, Moonstruck is definitely one of those films that I would avoid. The romance is pretty terrible, we’re talking on the level of the Titanic here. Maybe even worse than that to be honest with how many pairings there were. There was just no saving any of these characters and the film is reasonably long. That time could have been used to make a good romance instead. I’m all for having a bunch of drama but it has to be the right kind. This one will definitely not go down as a solid title. At least the moon looked nice, it always stands out in the sky.

Overall 2/10

Vera Cruz Review

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It’s time for a retro western. Well I guess you don’t even need to call it retro because they don’t really make westerns anymore hehe. This was not one of the better ones. The villains get away with way too much the whole time and you re left shaking your head. At best I can say that the ending was decent although one character comes across as looking like a bit of a sucker. He lets things go on for too long just for the sake of his personal pride/honor.

The film starts off by introducing us to two big shot gunmen. The first is Joe, who is one of those guys who believes in might makes right. He will do whatever he wants in order to succeed even if that means constantly betraying folks. He even tells Ben that nobody can be trusted in this world. Then you have Ben who has much more of a strict honor code. He is a lone gun right now thanks to tragic circumstances from his past but doesn’t want to lose himself. Naturally there is a whole lot of tension between the two of them. They are both recruited by a group of fighters who oppose the Mexican government. These guys have actually taken control of a great deal of the country and have the upper hand. Is their money worth choosing the wrong side in this civil war?

While the Mexican civil war is the backdrop for the whole film, I wouldn’t say that it is super important. The film seems to show the Mexican government as being the good guys here and so ideally that is the case but I’m not familiar with the two factions. Within the context of this movie the fighter group definitely appeared to be crooked with all of their underhanded tricks though. The government constantly took the high road even if it backfired several times with hostages being taken.

At one point they had the main characters cornered but unfortunately a bunch of kids ran in and got held hostage. The government should have fired as soon as the villains approached the kids. Hesitating like that is likely why they lost the country in the first place. Throughout the film we are shown the contrast of how Ben is not nearly as ruthless as Joe. I would just say that it’s a bit hollow considering that he is still working with the guy. I don’t give you a whole lot of points for standing by while other villains are doing their thing. That’s just not how this all works.

Ben was also just too passive in general. At one point a girl shows up and pickpockets him. He takes forever to notice and by the time he asks for it back, she has already spent all of the money. Ben ultimately doesn’t mind and falls for her anyway but it makes him look like a real soft touch. Joe really criticizes him for this and it’s the only time that the guy is right. Ben was putting everyone in danger for not being able to control his feelings. Then it all climaxes at the end where he is faced off with an unrepentant villain and still can’t take the shot because he wants them both to be on even playing field. Just not a smart decision.

I can’t say that Joe was much better though. I did think that the way he was constantly grinning throughout the movie was interesting though. It made him look particularly unhinged which I think was the overall point. So that was handled really well. That being said, it will always be hard to root for a villain. Especially one like Joe who is still obsessed with both women and gold. It’s not like he is fighting for some kind of grand cause or anything like that. The guy just wants all of life’s pleasures with no real responsibility.

As I mentioned before, the villains just get away with way too much throughout the film. The way you could have saved Ben’s character would have been to bump a few of them off early on. The two villains ride with a band of thugs who end up getting to the main heroine at one point for a while before the main two break it up. It’s always going to be too late when the main characters get their after contact and just makes them complicit the whole time. The film really could have used a good sheriff character who would show up to take care of these guys. That would have really made a big difference.

I don’t think a film like this was ever going to be great but removing a scene like that would still do a lot of good. The heroine wasn’t even a solid character as she had to use a lot of tricks in order to complete her mission. It’s always an annoying subplot to have to resort to that instead of just taking everyone down with a gun. That’s the most direct way to claiming victory and you always wonder why it doesn’t happen more often. The wild west will always give you plenty of opportunities to pick people off.

Overall, Vera Cruz was definitely not a good wild west title and is one that you will want to stay way from. It takes most of the worst elements of the genre like the general lawlessness of it all and doesn’t add in a lot of strengths to offset the whole thing. As a result the film itself never ends up being all that fun. The old style script is the only thing you can really give the film and that’s not much. I dare say that a film covering the actual civil war would have been much better and more entertaining. That would have ensured more big battles and definitely a more likable set of main characters. If you are ever in a situation where you have the upper hand against a villain, don’t give him time to go for his gun.

Overall 2/10

The Last House Review

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This is one of those films that just kept on getting worse and worse the more it went on. The film just didn’t know how to wrap things up and so the situation had to drag out a whole lot. It also made some key mistakes including adding a dog to the picture. That was never going to go over well and sure enough it ended up dooming this adventure. I’d definitely recommend staying far away from this title.

The film starts off with Jason going fishing. He doesn’t do very well but enjoys the sport for how relaxing it can be. A storm is brewing so he heads on home to be with his family. Unfortunately he quickly realizes that there is no way out. Everyone across the planet has now been locked inside of their houses and anyone who was outside is now dead. He has a lot of food at home so he and the rest of the family can last a few months but then it will all be game over. Who is doing this and how can the heroes manage to survive? The odds are not in his favor.

The movie starts off very cryptically but gradually we see what is going on here. It turns out that aliens have shown up. I go with aliens personally but it’s also implied that they came from the ocean. Unfortunately their goals and powers don’t make a whole lot of sense. It’s hard to get too much into the issues without spoilers so I’ll stick to broad strokes. They were able to shut off the gas and electricity right away but still let the heroes access running water and TV for a long time? Somehow people were still running around outside for days/weeks after the genocide so did the aliens get sloppy or are they just sadistic and wanted to let people stay alive longer?

Clearly they have a whole lot of hatred in their hearts for the humans and yet the ending undercuts their stubbornness in a big way. The ending just wasn’t earned and it goes for the wrong moral here as the humans needed to do all they could to crush these things. It’s hard to say exactly how durable they are but you have to give it your best effort. It was the only thing that one of the kids did right in his attempts to escape. I don’t see why you would just allow yourself to be a prisoner forever, that’s no life.

The main characters get a whole lot of plot armor the whole time though as the creatures should have finished them off early on. The only reason they did not is because these were the main characters so it really doesn’t count for much. Most of the characters look bad by the end. The only one who really stayed strong was Jason and even then he has a lot of moments for self doubt. I just give him more credit because he did keep his family alive.

Without him the others would have died early on. He is the one who kept the fight alive and never stopped struggling. His wife was very supportive for a while but gave up at different points in the film. She also joined the two kids in talking about how distant Jason was. Look, I’m not saying Jason was perfect by any means but as a father/husband his number one priority was figuring out a way to stop the creatures. He succeeded and that just came at the expense of his emotions for a while there.

I just find it hard to sympathize with the other characters. The son in particular is annoying with how he makes fun of Jason’s efforts to fix a car which took several years. He could have been gracious about the whole thing instead of immediately throwing cold water on the effort. It was just a really bad look for him. As for the daughter, she is younger for a lot of the film and not really able to do much. By the end of the film she starts acting like the creatures may not be that bad. Clearly she doesn’t remember how they brutally destroyed the jogger outside and have sealed everyone within their homes. It just comes across as dangerously naive to look at the aliens as anything other than mass murderers.

All of that said, what really crushed the film was the subplot about their sick dog. The dog needs medicine or he starts to have a heart attack and unfortunately there is no way to buy more pills as the film goes on. This inevitably leads to some rough scenes and this should not have been in the film. The movie also has the characters get awfully pragmatic about the lack of food coming up and so things get even darker. That was enough to sink the whole film. There is just no getting past that and the film didn’t have to get this grim dark. We also have a lot of animal hunting scenes and one even getting its neck broken just to underscore how dark the whole thing is. Nothing about the film is subtle.

I dare say you have to try all other avenues to the point of death first. I was unconvinced about the attempts to escape the house. Yes the water would block it but you have to keep trying to plug holes in there over and over. It’s a case where you have to assume it would have failed or someone around the world would have tried that but I would have liked to have seen more attempts. Then you also have the later parts of the film where the creature wanders into the house once in a while. That’s when you obviously have to attack and push your way past him.

When we found out that Jason had a gun I was expecting something like that by the end but it ended up all being a red herring. The film feels like a red herring at times with some interesting ideas but nothing comes of them. I wanted to learn what the monsters were doing and where was the government? Surely there were a good amount of people who fought back from outside the houses when the whole situation started. This is a film that desperately needed world building. It was almost 2 hours too so there was plenty of time to do that instead of having constant time skips. The film should have cut quite a few of those out because it also gets less scary when the characters have been surviving just fine for years. That undermines the villains all the way.

A film about everyone being stuck at home is really interesting but you have to think about the premise all the way around so it isn’t easy to stick a bunch of holes in it. The idea is so much better than the execution and it isn’t even close. Maybe Netflix will get it right next time but I have my doubts. If a remake was announced I would still be interested in checking it out though.

Overall, The Last House is definitely a film that will fade in your memory over time. It did not make any of the right decisions and that really limited its potential. In the way you always need to find a way to surpass the odds and deliver a scary product that is still fun. That didn’t happen here and so you can do much better. You won’t want to invest 2 hours into this title that doesn’t even give you a great payoff in the end.

Overall 1/10

Captain Kronos – Vampire Hunter Review

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This review is of the TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for another vampire film and this one is made by Horror. Needless to say, this was doomed from the start. Both of those things are usually connected to the absolute worst films around and when you mix them together then that’s a recipe for disaster. Ultimately this film was not able to rise above my first impressions there and at best you can give it credit for some original decisions.

The film introduces us to Captain Kronos who is a powerful fighter. He has been slaying vampires for a long time along with his partner Professor Grost. This time he is tasked with finding a potential vampire in a small village. This will not be an easy task as Kronos will need to lay out some traps and gradually begin getting suspects. In the meantime this vampire will keep on picking more and more people off. Kronos also runs into a lady named Carla who was about to be executed. After saving her, she decides to become his girlfriend but is there any time for this?

Okay lets blast through all of the issues first. Right away one of the big ones is naturally going to be the usual vampire violence. I’m not big on the blood sucking at all and that is always a main part of this genre. It’s a bit different than some others since the vampire is more interested in stealing vitality but equals out to the same thing. The vampire also uses the usual hypnosis to force the victims into accepting their fate rather than running off to live another day.

We’ve also got the very shallow kind of romance at the ready here. Yes, Kronos saved Carla’s life so you can see why she would be grateful but this doesn’t immediately have to turn into a relationship. She jumps right into the one night stand kind of situation without batting an eye. I feel like the Hammer films like to use any excuse for a bit of fanservice. It’s not as crazy as in some of their other titles but still comes across as unnatural.

The characters also aren’t all that interesting. Professor Grost is easily rage baited by the villains to the point where he doesn’t realize that they were being paid off to instigate a fight. Both Kronos and Carla seemed to figure that out right away so why didn’t the professor? He is a good ally to have around and helps out a lot with the weapons and everything but you feel like he could have done a whole lot better.

As for Kronos, well I suppose he’s your classic hero. I don’t get the feeling that he is the most dependable guy in a relationship with how fast he was moving here but maybe he wouldn’t rebound later on. His fighting skills are pretty good though and surpass the film’s budget. He essentially vanishes mid combat to show off how fast he is. I appreciate that from a power level sense but then his final plan is terrible. He sends Carla into the vampire’s lair as bait and then takes his sweet time to get there. He takes the time to look at a skull in the upper floors and this distracts him while Carla is attacked.

If not for a significant degree of plot armor, she would have been dead. Prior to Carla, all of the other victims were destroyed right away. A good example of this was earlier in the same film. The heroes all staked out the location where the vampire would be striking and a girl was walking on by. Well, they lost sight of her and so she was destroyed before she could even get close. Not a good look at all. It’s why you feel like Kronos should have done a lot more before the ending.

As for the vampire, well the identity of the final boss is a twist of course. Still, I wouldn’t say that the villain was very impressive or imposing. This long term plan had a ton of risks with it and I would say that the character even got lucky. It’s not like vampires ever tend to be all that interesting but this was still pretty egregious even for that. You also had a pair of siblings who are around for lore but don’t do much of anything. It was a little funny to see them standing so still in the background during the big battle.

The final battle is essentially fencing so it wasn’t terribly interesting but I give the film some credit there. Still, there is just nothing really to enjoy about the film. If you heavily lean into the action angle then it is possible to make a vampire film that is actually decent but it is incredibly difficult and not something that just any title can do.

There isn’t much to talk about regarding the setting as it looks like basically any old town. The writing is okay I suppose but just about everyone in town seems to be evil. There aren’t many characters that Kronos can count on. The doctor who invited him there had to be bumped off naturally and it wasn’t the most painless way to go out either. The other humans at the bar didn’t even need to be mind controlled because they were already content to murder the main characters for a little money. With humanity being so corrupt in this town, it’s no wonder that a vampire was able to get so far.

Overall, This film was definitely a mess and is not going to end up being known as a solid title. It does at least try to have the usual twists and turns but ultimately comes down to just being another slasher title. It takes forever for Kronos to stop the vampire from murdering everyone and so the victory feels hollow. It doesn’t even make all that much sense on why Kronos left without Carla. She totally could have kept going on the journey and instead it seems like he’ll probably just be rebounding before now. Perhaps this could have become a really cool movie series some day but that day isn’t today.

Overall 1/10