It’s time for more Bond and this time he will have to deal with a rival who may even be on his level. The concept is definitely cool but as the film goes on, you realize that the rival is a paper one. I’ll explain more about that in a minute but needless to say this film still falls into the usual issues of a Bond film. Perhaps that is just the inevitable fate of most Bond adventures.

The film starts with showing us how both Bond and Anya are messing around despite being called the world’s greatest secret agents. Bond manages to murder a bunch of enemy agents as he heads back to base though. MI6 has called him in to find the missing nuclear submarine that someone stole from Russia. Naturally this is a pretty big deal since it is a national crisis. Russia has also sent in their best agent, Anya to find out what’s going on. Both of them will be crossing paths as they uncover the mystery behind this but can they keep their hands to themselves?

I do like the hook of finally seeing another secret agency in the forefront. Surprisingly the films don’t often do this. Sure, other agencies like the CIA are referenced but typically they tend to just get wrecked off screen. That said, the film doesn’t totally commit to the bit as Anya isn’t super skilled. Perhaps relative to some of the other agents but she consistently feels outmatched here. This is why I would call her a rival on paper.

So on paper Anya is a genius, master of martial arts, and her resourcefulness speaks for itself. She should be able to hold her own against anyone. Well, on the field it just doesn’t play out that way. She may be able to defeat Bond at times in word games like when she mentions where the submarine is. Additionally, she is able to defeat him by using his weakness to women and spraying him with a knock out gas. The whole thing was super embarrassing for Bond but when it comes time for a fight, she is dispatched quickly.

She allows Jaws to defeat her even when she had a gun on him and he was unarmed. When she crosses with Bond, she is pitting her karate chop against his gun. Anya just wasn’t ready for this and the fact that she can distract Bond with her charms just feels like a consolation prize at best. I would have liked her to have been out there in the field murdering a ton of fighters and really giving Bond a reason to respect her abilities. Considering the series we’re watching, this will probably only be possible if the rival agent is a guy.

As for Bond, well he looks pretty bad as always. The whole world is in danger with the nuclear weapons here and he’s still trying to make a pass at everybody? Bond needs to lock in at this point and he just doesn’t have enough moments like that. Bond is ready to have his fun and lose the mission which is not what you want a hero to do. I appreciate his smug attitude and how Bond talks down to everyone but it’s still hard to overlook his faults.

Meanwhile Jaws is a solid villain because of his skills even if he lacks the overall charisma that Scaramanga had. Jaws is shown to be borderline superhuman with how he can absorb so many blows. He walks away from a massive car crash at one point with essentially no injuries. Bond is clearly not able to beat him one on one but is quicker so usually the environment ends up being the deciding factor. Jaws mouth is metal after all which makes things difficult for him around magnets.

His boss is technically the head honcho but that guy doesn’t look all that good. I appreciate all the tough talk and how he dispatched several characters in the opening scene. He knows how to stay on top but ultimately gets a little too cocky. His gun needed to be quite a bit shorter to be effective and the trigger needed to be silent. The guy had an interesting goal of wanting humanity to only live beneath the waves though. I’ll give him some points for originality I suppose.

As always the film suffers from fanservice and terrible romances which distract from the main plot. In fact, this time it’s even worse because the plot is completely going against the romance. Anya’s whole plot is to avenge her fiancé but she’s messing around with Bond right away. You could try to defend this by saying that it’s part of her job and she’ll get with everybody in order to further the mission but that really doesn’t help at all. It just pushes forward the worst trope of a female agent which is having to do any of that stuff in the beginning.

Nah you need to be able to solidify her as a top tier threat who doesn’t need to do that. Bond never does either, he just does it for fun. That needs to be dialed back as well so that he can actually be a likable character. The film’s general pacing and story is good but these things hold it back quite a lot. The fanservice is unrelenting and is something you don’t see so much of outside of the Bond films. In a way that’s what makes it so notable here.

I should mention that the songs aren’t all that impressive for me. I didn’t cover that in the prior Bond film but generally none of the songs have moved me so far. They sound decent, I’m certainly not calling them bad. However, I would not be looking them up on Youtube or anything like that. They really lack a better beat or incredible lyrics that force you to rewatch them. These just feel like what you would expect from a Bond film tbh and I don’t really mean that in a good way.

Overall, This film had an interesting premise but didn’t live up to it in classic Bond style. I will always take a plot like this with multiple factions over not having them at all though. If you have liked the Bond films up to now then you should like this one as well. In a lot of ways it is playing the adventure completely straight and that’s not a bad thing for the most part. The series just needs a way to lose the fanservice and then it can one day rise up as one of the all time greats! Until then, it will have to be satisfied with being at the back of the pack when it comes to action/thriller franchises.

Overall 4/10