It’s time to look at a second rate Star Trek film with a crew that certainly won’t impress you. This film was so much worse than I had expected it to be due to the terribly written romance that was included. So, to those that say this is Star Wars IV level, I have to shake my head this time. I don’t think I want any big remakes of this film and I’d rather they adapt The Invisible Boy again. That review’s coming soon so prepare yourself for it. On that note, here we go!

John and his friends command a spaceship and have been sent to an alien planet to look for a researcher who vanished here many years ago. They find him all right, but the rest of the crew has been mysteriously murdered. Hmmm, is it possible that there was some foul play afoot here? The researcher refuses to answer any questions, but the team of space cadets is attacked by an invisible monster at night. After a few space cadets are murdered, John decides to not focus on the issue all that much and focus on romance instead. Does this crew really stand a chance at accomplishing their mission?

The rest of the film would have gotten a decent 6/10 ranking if not for the romance so let’s start with that. The main heroine is Altaira and the problem is that she doesn’t really understand human culture. She doesn’t know what a “kiss” is, etc. The group naturally takes advantage of this and several (perhaps all. Given that the film hints at this by having her say “Why don’t you kiss me like everyone else” to the main character) of them kiss her. The film uses this as an excuse to have her bathing without a bathing suit because she doesn’t know what one is along with fairly dicey forms of attire. You’d think that John would be above all this since he’s the commander, but he decides to get in on the fun as well.

It’s a terrible romance because Altaira doesn’t really understand what she’s doing. The men are just tricking her for their own pleasure. John even admits that they haven’t seen a woman in a very long time so the crew will all dash at her. John says it as a warning, and yet…he’s no better. Altaira essentially has the maturity of a child and so, this romance was never going to work and it obliterated any chance that the film had of being good.

None of the human characters were likable either so that didn’t exactly help the film either. John is a terrible captain and none of his men seem to have any moral values. Altaira is way too naive and her father is cryptic and shady for no real reason. He doesn’t warn the space cadets about the monster until it destroys a few of the members and he didn’t even realize that messing with futuristic tech could destroy his mind. He’s supposed to be some kind of genius right?

Forbidden Planet also goes to great depths to show off its equipment at the expense of destroying the film’s pacing. The pacing completely dies for nearly an hour as the characters slowly walk from room to room looking at just about every single piece of equipment. They even take a quick ride around the complex, which takes around 15 minutes of real time just for fun. Maybe if the effects actually looked good it wouldn’t drag quite as much, but compared to films like Tron Legacy…this one can’t hold up.

The effects aren’t bad though and apparently they were terrific for its day. I don’t think it justifies the incredibly long wait time though. There’s not really a soundtrack, but you wouldn’t expect one for a very old film like this one. There is one highlight to the film that I haven’t really touched on yet. That’s the famous Robbie the Robot. Rob definitely deserves all of the praise that he gets because the character is very enjoyable and a bright spot amidst my other complaints. He has a nice blend of condescending smacktalk with subtle sarcasm to make him a rather deep character. He’s certainly not two dimensional and he’s very loyal as well. He is powerful and I would have liked to have seen him fight the monster, but that’s all right. The insults all make up for it. It’s easy to see why he would later return for other movies.

The monster was also decently cool. The invisibility trick was likely to save the budget, but we got some glimpses here and there and even a quick shot towards the end. I wish the monster could have appeared for an extended amount of time though. Regardless, it broke the barriers made of pure energy which theoretically should not be possible. Who knows, we may have found a rival for Godzilla after all. It’s a shame that this action part of the film could not have been a bit longer because it was easily the highlight of the film. I’m always up for more action after all and the laser fights reminded me of Star Trek. It was certainly made in that kind of style and had the film gone this route, it likely would have been a lot better.

Overall, A terrible romance is what ultimately doomed this film. It could be drawn out and a little boring at times, but it would have still doubled the score that it ultimately got here. The laser action scenes and the giant monster would make sure of it. Maybe throw in a twist about aliens arriving as well for extra tension. If you’re looking for a retro sci-fi film, you should just go and watch Star Wars Episode IV. If you do plan to see the film, at least you’ll have Robbie The Robot to enjoy. His presence in the film does help to elevate it to a certain degree. This isn’t the last that you’ll see of good ole Robbie though as my next review will feature another big appearance of his.

Overall 3/10