Red Dawn Review

Posted on October 2, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time for a retro war film. As you may expect from the title, things are looking a little dicey for America in this film. We’re outgunned and we’re outnumbered, but we’ve got determination on our side! I can’t say that I had high expectations going into the film and it was more or less what I may have expected. A little worse than what I had expected, but trust me when I say that I was not expecting a masterpiece in the first place. All right, let’s see what made this film hit the ground.

The plot involves a group of teenagers. Jed, Matt, and a few others were at school trying to learn a thing or two when they are attacked by the enemy. See, The United Nations was basically disbanded and all of the countries were either taken over or ran away when the going got tough. This basically left America by its lonesome along with some support from England against Russia and an army of other lands. Their troops attack the school and decide to destroy everyone who’s inside of it. The teenagers escape and head to the mountains where they stay for a little over a month. Eventually, they decide that they’re going to try and take America back as they form the Wolverines. They shall slay anyone who gets in their way. America shall survive!

Well, it’s a classic tale of how a few people can really make the difference in the war. Naturally, it’s hard to even know where to begin when discussing why this does not work. First of all, let’s talk about America. We would definitely not be defeated so easily. I won’t say what the outcome of the war is, but the enemy invaded way too easily. We definitely would have been more prepared and we would have watched as tensions escalated. Never underestimate the strongest country on the planet.

Next up, the Wolverines are very overpowered. They have enough resources to grab rockets, dozens of grenades, different uniforms to camouflage with the environment throughout the year, and so on. They’re still bold enough to walk into town though since nobody can recognize them without their proper gear. The Wolverines are only made up of a few teenagers (at first) but they know how to fight. They easily outshoot the trained professionals when necessary and it just goes to show that your average Quarterback is more than just a strong arm.

I wasn’t really impressed with most of the characters. Jed was definitely better than most of the other heroes. The problem is that it’s more of a default victory than anything. He knows that it’s not good to cry after every casualty and he’s the one who gets everyone to keep their acts together. That being said, Jed can get a little too confident and his big words, “You lose” come back to bite him.

The rest of the teenagers either get no character or are here to drag the rest of the heroes down. Keeping track of all of the names can be tricky, but it doesn’t really matter all that much here. One of the teenagers tends to panic whenever the going gets tough. He’s not the kind of guy that you really want on your team. The heroes also get betrayed by one of the teammates, who basically sells them out. He got sold out first and then decided to sell out his friends. There were two girls who joined the group and they were way too unprepared. They panic at one point in the mountains, which almost costs the heroes everything. Encouraging the others to stay and eat when the enemies laid out an obvious trap wasn’t cool either, but all of the heroes were to blame.

Really, I can’t say that I liked any of them. With the constant panicking, fighting, or just making mistakes in general, it was hard to believe that these guys could really take out so much of the enemy forces. We also had an American pilot who joins the ranks at one point, but he doesn’t really add anything to the story. He just reminds us that America is getting creamed out there and he belittles the teenagers a lot. He has his big moment where he goes up against a tank and realizes that it may have been a bit of a dicey move. At least he reminds the heroes to shoot straight.

One of the classic mistakes that this film makes is the animal violence. We don’t need to see the “heroes” taking the animals down for food. The “hardcore” American tries to one up them by saying that he’s seen squads have to eat each other to keep on going. Yeah…those guys lacked strength of will. Those things certainly aren’t going to help the film at all.

We don’t get much of a soundtrack and I’m not sure how much it could have helped anyway. Red Dawn just isn’t a good film and even writing the review can be a little tedious. It gets to the point where the film had so many negatives that it’s just a little overwhelming. To put it simply, the film was just pretty dreary and it lacked any interesting characters. All of the figures were just there to take up space and to remind us that war isn’t typically good for anyone. The film just forgot that America never surrenders and we should have quickly launched the nukes after such an assault.

The only piece of credit that I would give the film is that the events can feel a little surreal. I can’t say that I really expected the teacher to be taken down so quickly and for the action to suddenly begin like that. It was a little hard to believe that the invasion was actually happening. The film just stayed in the mist for the rest of the experience though and it’s something that’s only good for short bursts. Red Dawn needed to quickly embrace the action or to try and go in a different direction. Staying in the mist is not a good idea either way.

One of the flaws of this film is that is can also be pretty boring. I already mentioned how detached you become from the characters. That’s definitely the first step and it doesn’t get any better since you need to like the characters to enjoy the story. (Typically this is the case) You really know that nothing’s going to happen so it also takes your drive away from watching it. Ah well, you just watch the minutes go by and think about what would have happened if the film had actually gotten a sequel. Now That would have been dicey!

Overall, Red Dawn is a film that can’t break through the test of time to get me to recognize that it was a good film. It will have to be thrown to the wayside along with other classics like The Lord of The Rings and James Bond. The teacher at the school was one of the only characters that I found to be pretty interesting and he’s written out of the film right away. At least he stayed courageous from start to finish. He never showed any fear and that’s what I would expect from him. If you want to watch a war film..check out the Avengers. It’s like watching a war skirmish in New York since there is a lot of destruction and the heroes face extremely large numbers of aliens. Skipping this film will be one of the better decisions that you’ve made in a while!

Overall 2/10

47 Ronin Review

Posted on May 14, 2014 by dreager1

I remember seeing the trailer for this film in the theaters a while ago. The trailer had a lot of action, but on the other hand..it was mythical action set in the olden times of the Hobbit. If you’ve read my reviews of that film series, you know that this isn’t a positive thing. The film confirmed my fears as I watched it and it’s time to see why the 47 Ronin could not even score a 4.

The film’s plot is pretty basic. Kai is a “half breed” and nobody likes him. Unearthly creatures raised him, but Kai fled because he didn’t want to be a villain. He decided to work for a Samurai group in Japan, but they treated him as a slave. Undeterred, he warns one of the samurai that a witch has infiltrated their ranks. The samurai fumbles for a quick excuse so that he won’t have to face her and he says that Kai just has a crush. Their master is put under a spell and tricked into incriminating himself so that he destroys himself with honor! The main villain is the leader of another tribe, Kira. Kira decides to take the main heroine for himself and the feudal lord of Japan forbids the samurai from doing anything about it. The samurai are quickly beaten and thrown around. Time skip! The samurai decide to come together to save the heroine. Hopefully she’s still okay….it’s only been a year right? They head out and get ready to win it big or go home in pieces.

If the plot feels like it was just thrown together…then it’s time to read it again. I’ll admit that it’s not my greatest plot summary, but it’s hard to make it sound interesting. None of the characters were likable and the villains were terrible, but not in a “Look how epicly evil he is” but in a “this guy’s extremely weak and evil, he wouldn’t last a second against Barney with prep time) Let’s get into the various reasons as to why this film did not become enjoyable.

Slow pacing. The film is around 2 hours and the plot doesn’t even start until over an hour has passed. (By plot, I’m referring to the Samurai becoming Ronin and 47 of them going to attack the villains) The first hour is about the heroes getting beaten up and a lot of sad things happening to them. One thing that I’ve never liked is when a film dwells on the sad parts for too long. We get that the character’ life is pretty awful right now…let’s move on. Kai gets beaten up in almost every scene and it gets pretty tiring after a (very short) while. Nothing really happens in the first half and nothing good really happens in the second half.

Classic animal violence is another problem with the film. It’s to be expected which is why I don’t like when films take place in the olden days. We have horses that are injured and slain during the battle with the Chimera. I’m not talking about one or two horses, but a whole lot of them! The Chimera is also animal like in appearance, which definitely does not help matters. Even the final boss is an animal! (Once again, the trailer shows off some of the final scenes of the film…)

Boring fight scenes is a big problem for this film. The Hobbit, Prince Caspian, Lord of the Rings, and Pirates of the Carrabean suffer greatly from this issue. You know that a fight scene is bad when a comedy like The Secret Life of Walter Mitty has one that is many times better. The problem with sword fight scenes in the olden days is that they are typically boring. You need good choreography and preferably a cool sword as opposed to a generic one. These fight scenes just have people stabbing each other and all of the “grittyness” will make you snicker or cringe. If you want a good sword fight, check out Bleach!

Unnecessary grittiness is pretty self explanatory, but it’s still a negative. To trick the head of the Samurai into getting himself into trouble, the witch puts a spell on him and he sees that Mika is in danger. He quickly attacks Kira, but then the illusion wears off and his life is basically over. There were so many other ways that they could have handled this, but they made sure to choose one of the worst ones possible. This kind of scene will never help a film and it will only make it lose more points in my book. That was just awful.

There can’t be any other negatives right? Well, we’ve got a minor one at the ready and that would be the soundtrack. It’s one of the most forgettable soundtracks that I’ve seen in a while and I can’t remember a single theme. That’s pretty sad and while it’s minor compared to the others…it’s definitely not a good thing. How can you enjoy a film without a good music playing in the background?

The cast is also terrible. I don’t like a single living character in the film. They’re all mean or unlikable. Kai is the main character and we’re supposed to feel bad for him since he’s always getting beaten up. His “friends” also beat him up because they don’t want to stand up to the villains. Kai is then forced into slavery and fights death matches for a year. He’s a changed man by the end, but he still refuses to use his super powers…even though they could end the war and help a lot of people. He still doesn’t want too use them for no discernible reason. Using these abilities is not going to turn him evil and a lot of people died because he wouldn’t make the tough call. (The Kai from Cardfight Vanguard would be ashamed!)

Oishi is one of the big “heroes” by the end, but it’s really hard to root for him. He was mean to Kai for the entire beginning and he only acts nice to him once he needs Kai’s help. Oishi also spent a year in solitary confinement, but he’s actually doing pretty well considering. (Unless it was less than a year, but I believe that it said one year) Oishi has his big fight at the end, but…that’s not going to change anyone’s mind. Oishi should have stuck up for himself!

The only character that could be considered cool is the samurai made out of steel. He’s not actually alive as he seems to have been created by the witch. His power is incredible and he feels no pain. He caused an entire squadron to retreat in fear of the very sight of him.

Kira is the main villain and he’s completely unlikable. He’s smug, but he’s not even a great fighter. He can fight, but he is usually hiding behind the witch and his henchmen. He kidnaps people and he doesn’t have any goals that I can get behind. In short…he’s a terrible villain. He’s a generic character that is evil for the purpose of being evil.

Mika is the main heroine and she gets a pretty sore deal in this film. She can’t really fight so the villains take her pretty easily. She is then left to fend for herself for a very long period of time. Her situation is pretty depressing and the ending isn’t great either. She has to hope that the rest of the citizens aren’t corrupted and I would quickly try to move to America if I were her.

Mizuki is one of the big villains and she does most of the work for Kira. She frames the old leader of the samurai and she also beats up a lot of the samurai while she’s in her serpent form. She’s not very powerful in that form, but she’s still a match for the humans. She’s not likable either as she’s just there to help Kira. There’s no reason to root for her and you just want her screen time to end.

Asano was the old boss of the samurai and he wasn’t very likable. He was too old to fight, but he did try his best. He didn’t go down like a man and his untimely demise was not very epic. That’s partially why Asano just didn’t rank in the end. He should have tried harder and he could have been cooler, although he definitely made the right move during the illusion. No one can fault him for that.

Finally, the ending is terrible. It cemented the fact that I wouldn’t like any of these heroes. They took the easy way out by taking a quick exit instead of living for the consequences. A true hero would have fought the odds and tried to stay alive. Better to die on your feet than die on your knees right? The ending is pretty sad and you’ll leave the theater on a sad note. That tells you that the film is doing something majorly wrong. No matter what the genre is, you should leave a film humming or feeling pretty epic about yourself. This film doesn’t accomplish that since I don’t see myself discussing it that much in the future.

Overall, this is a film that I would strongly advise skipping. You won’t be finding a fun samurai experience here and you’ll be better off watching the Rurouni Kenshin series. The film makes about as many errors as it could make and there really aren’t any redeemable features about this movie. The undead samurai was decently cool, but his very limited screen time isn’t worth checking the film out. Not to worry, the new Godzilla film is almost upon us and I recommend preordering your tickets for the big event instead of renting this film from Netflix.

Overall 2/10

The Hobbit The Desolation of Smaug Review

Posted on May 1, 2014 by dreager1

After checking out the rest of the films in this franchise; it’s only natural that I watch the latest installment. If you’ve seen my previous reviews…then you’ll know that I’m not really a fan of the series. Still, Smaug got a lot of hype and maybe he could single handily save the film. A guy can hope right? Time to see if this film was a cut above the rest!

It wasn’t. I usually leave that for the end, but it could be an interesting way to start off the review. After I discuss the plot; I will discuss how the film could have improved and gotten away from the negatives that buried the other films. If I’m lucky, the director will notice these pointers before it’s too late to alter the final entry in the franchise.

In one of the plots; Bilbo and friends want to infiltrate Smaug’s lair so that they can steal the ultimate jewel and get the rest of the rebels to join them. It will be a tough ordeal, but they are confident that Bilbo can succeed. If only Bilbo’s “friends” were actually on his side….. Meanwhile, Legolas and Tauriel decide to take down a lot of Orcs. They take many of their opponents down with ease and they are definitely excellent at hand to hand combat. Legolas needs to take down the general and he may have to fight the army on his own because Tauriel has things to attend too. Finally, Gandalf The (not so) Brave decides to check out some rumors. Is it possible that Sauron still lives? Let’s just say that Gandalf looks pretty awful in his subplot.

All right, we’ve got the plot out of the way. Now, we can discuss what holds this franchise back. Let’s start with the classic Animal Violence. There’s not much to say about this negative. The only way to improve upon this mistake is to completely get rid of those scenes. We don’t need to see the animals get hurt and the riders should lead off into battle without horses. Animal violence is easily one of the biggest mistakes that a film can make and this series typically pulls it off.

Next up, the fight scenes. This film had a lot of action and yet…I didn’t care for the fight scenes. There are two main reasons for this. One, it’s old style action, which means that they’re just clanging swords and stabbing each other. There isn’t much in the way of choreography and you can’t get into the fights. We all know that the orcs are just going to be slaughtered and that the elves are going to take an easy win.

The action is mainly bloodless, but they try to make it as violent as they can. From “epic” sword stabs to complex maneuvers that make you feel bad for the villain. Blows under the belt, to the eye, or anywhere like that are basically not fun to watch. I’d rather have a classy fight where both opponents give it their all. Villains don’t play fair, but we don’t need to see both sides stoop to such levels to win a fight.

Fixing this problem should be easy in theory. The fight scenes would look better if they weren’t so ancient. Instead of trying to make the fights violent without blood, just make the actual fights more interesting. A little martial arts, or a longer sword fight. Less minions being effortlessly defeated and a few more challenges. As it stands, the fight scenes aren’t much better than the talking scenes.

Unfortunately, this next hole is a lot tougher to correct. The fact that none of the characters in the franchise are really cool. We get a lot of the stereotypes. The cowardly hero, the “hardcore” but deadly fighter, the corrupt king, the tough female warrior, etc. None of them really get past their stereotypes and any development that is gained does not help. I wouldn’t say that Tauriel and Legolas are bad characters. They’re decent, but their lines are pretty generic and they try wayyy too hard to be cool. There’s a difference between trying to be cool and actually being really cool.

Bilbo is not as bad as Frodo, but he’s not much better either. The ring is already starting to corrupt him and he doesn’t really try to resist it…at all. Bilbo is also quick to praise the villain in hopes of escape and he lacks courage. I just can’t root for him. The dwarf who wants to be king is awful and he turned out to be a big crook. He turned against Bilbo for no reason and he seems to be losing his mind. I definitely wouldn’t be surprised if he did! The rest of the heroes tend to give up quickly and they actually desert Bilbo at one point. That’s pretty unacceptable. Gandalf continues to shock and amaze us all as he keeps on losing. We get that he’s only a human with some magic, but he’s always reminding us of this fact. Just by looking at Sauron; Gandalf is quickly defeated and humiliated. That’s not what I really want to see from my heroes right now. I expect much greater things from them! At this point, I’d say that the characters are a lost cause. We can’t win them all I suppose.

Smaug did not impress me either. He talks a pretty good game, but he was completely humiliated by Bilbo…wait for it…Baggins! Bilbo kept mocking him during the entire fight and Smaug was too slow to hit anyone. The dwarves really made him look bad and I can’t really see him as a cool character anymore. I can only hope that he looks impressive in the sequel, but I highly doubt it. He ended up like Sauron…..an underwhelming villain.

Tauriel is one of the new characters in the film so she can get her own write up as well. She wasn’t bad, but as referenced earlier…she was pretty generic. I feel like we’ve seen her character dozens of times before. I didn’t care for her subplot with the dwarf, but at least she can fight pretty well. While her character description may seem negative; I still say that she wasn’t a bad character. She could have used some development and more scenes, but she did well. She’s definitely a lot better than 90% of the other characters.

Ironically, this film didn’t even have a great soundtrack. Usually, the films in this continuity had a decent soundtrack and it provided the viewer with a little relief. At least, it would help one to not fall asleep. (Unfortunately, the music was not potent enough to keep me up for this franchise, but I expect to be wide awake for the final film) I don’t remember any opera themes and the rest of the tunes were uninspired. I really do not like the happy Hobbit theme that plays in these films and the rest aren’t much better.

There is some romance in the film, but it wasn’t terrible. It was completely unnecessary and didn’t add anything to the story, but it didn’t get a lot of screentime. It got overshadowed by how awful the characters could be. A running joke in the series is how easily the mind can be defeated. Bilbo lacked willpower, the (future) King couldn’t control himself, Gandalf can’t control the ring….etc. It’s basically game over for everyone.

Also, I have to say that the special effects are pretty bad. This is a 2013 film and the effects don’t show this. Sauron’s brief cameo is the only time where we get to see some cool energy power. Unfortunately, that’s just not good enough for me. The rest of the film still looks like it could have been made in the 70’s and that’s a quick turn off to me as a viewer. I need good CGI and effects or a good background. If you’re missing both of these….then there’s really not much hope for the film.

Overall, this film didn’t fare any better than the earlier installments. It lacked charm and heart. If this film couldn’t save the franchise for me…then nothing will. I’ll likely catch the final film in theaters or on dvd at some point. I still need to finish the saga and prove that the Super Mario Brothers film was better. I don’t recommend this film and you would be better off watching Pokemon. That show didn’t fall into any of the major holes and it has a pretty solid main character as well.

Overall 2/10

Resident Evil Afterlife Review

Posted on March 17, 2014 by dreager1

*Disclaimer, this is a review of the edited version of the film so that it is TV-14. The uncut version would likely get a lower score*

It’s time to review the final Resident Evil film that I’ve seen. I’ll likely get around to the 5th at some point, but this one works as a final film…if not for the big cliffhanger. Still, it’s a staple for this series and I’m expecting the next one to have a similarly epic conclusion. The ending from the last film hinted at the ultimate showdown between Alice and Wesker, but we don’t really get to see that.

The film starts off with Alice’s assault on Wesker’s base. Humanity may not have been entirely eradicated in the Extinction film, but now she can reduce the numbers a little more. Her clones take out Wesker’s men pretty easily, but Wesker is a different story. He takes out a few of the clones and escapes in his getaway vehicle. The real Alice had been waiting for him there, but she forgot the last few years of zombie fighting experience and Wesker stabs her with the cure. Alice is happy to be human again and then the ship explodes and both of them “die.”

After dying for the 3rd or 4th time in the series, Alice wakes up. She’s relatively unharmed and she goes off to regroup with the members that she had separated from last time. They’re in a cold place, which is supposed to be safe from zombies. Unfortunately, Alice is attacked by her mind controlled ally. Alice is still human, but she is able to fend her off and learns that it’s Claire. They head off and meet up with a group of new characters. These guys look like expendables and I will say that they probably are. I won’t confirm it for spoiler reasons of course.

Now, their only hope is to escape the prison complex that they are staying in (To keep the zombies out!) and head for the true Arcadia. Arcadia is not a super village, but a normal boat. The plan is reasonably simple and the heroes must go under water into the weapons vault and also use a giant tank to escape. Things get complicated when a man known as Chris Redfield is released from his jail cell. Can he really be trusted!?

There you have it….the plot is pretty underwhelming. It’s better than Extinction, but I can’t really say much else for it. The film had such potential, but it was wasted. I’ll go into that in detail soon, but first we should get the characters out of the way.

Alice has lost some of the coolness that she had in the second and third films. She is seen as a professional fighter in this one and her powers were at her peak. So, how could she let Wesker cure her in one hit like that? It was pretty sloppy to give him that opportunity when she had the element of surprise and prep time at her disposal. I suppose that the writers really wanted to get rid of her powers, but there must have been a better way. Alice does well for a human, but it’s still disappointing to see her powers go. She’s definitely the best hero in the film, but Chris and Claire aren’t too far behind.

Chris is a solid character to add to the group. He may not be as cool as Carlos was in his debut, but Chris has the makings of a solid character. He’s a professional as well and his gun skills are solid. He may have been out of his league in his battle against Wesker, but he gave it his all. Hopefully he can stay cool through his next movie appearance.

Claire has amnesia for part of the film, but she seems to be regaining her memories by the end. She’s a pretty decent fighter and helps out in the battles against the Axeman and Wesker. It’s good to have more supporting characters from the video games to aid Alice and Claire should have a decent role in the next film.

Wesker is the big villain in this film and one could make the argument that he’s even stronger than the live action Avengers! His speed is impressive, but even more so is his raw power. Unfortunately, his abilities do lead the film into a hole, but I’ll go into that at greater length in the upcoming paragraphs. Wesker is a pretty cool villain and it’s easy to root for the guy. We know that he’s evil, but you can barely tell aside from the ending and the scenes where he shoots or blows people up. He does everything in a pretty cool way and the sunglasses definitely add to that effect. He’s definitely one of the reasons why the beginning of this film was so cool and he also gives us the best end fight scene.

The Axeman is the middle boss of the film so he’s not as intense as Wesker. He gets a lot of silent hype as we see him in the background from time to time. Things don’t really get moving until he infiltrates the base of the heroes and starts his attack. Claire takes him on for a while before Alice steps in. Alice is depowered so the fight could be tougher than expected. Still, Axeman is only as durable as a normal zombie and he’s not really a threat except for his huge axe. He doesn’t really have any character so it’s hard to like him.

There are some supporting characters that I did not mention, but that’s because they’re all expendables.(?) We’ve got the ace swimmer who decides that she can definitely outswim a bunch of zombies…..if only she had kept moving! We had the famous actor who decides that he can take out a group of zombies as long as he has a shotgun. We have an apprentice to a director, but he decides to freeze up as a slashing zombie approaches from behind. Rinse and repeat for every side character in the franchise. If you’re lucky, then you’ll turn into a Chris or a Claire, but usually you’ll just be part of the background by the end.

One character that gets a big role is the actual director. I would look for his real name, but it’s not too important. All you need to know is that he believes in the Hollywood principles of fame and fortune. Unfortunately, he takes it too far and joins up with the zombies. I wonder how a group of zombies will take to a human being around them? You may not have to think on that one too much, but things definitely get dicey. He does make things difficult for the heroes as he murders(And here I thought only zombies could destroy side characters!) one of them and also hijacks a plane. Too bad LJ wasn’t here this time. He’s definitely not one of the more likable characters and you’ll likely wince whenever he appears. He only gets one good line in the whole film in which he manages to insult the entire cast with his demanding tone.

The best part of the film was easily the opening, but it also hurt the rest of the film. It would be like having the big Darth Vader vs Luke Skywalker fight be at the beginning of the film and then watching the rest of the earlier events. Time goes on as usual in Resident Evil, but we don’t get any scenes with the same level of stakes as the intro. This is because the intro was expected due to the finale of the last film and everyone was likely hyped for it.

The fight scenes did not disappoint and the beginning was very good. There was definitely a Matrix feeling to those scenes and it was fun to see the clones pull off a lot of superhero feats. It may be a little sad to see a clone get taken down by a few guys with guns, but she had a lot of reinforcements. Alice found dozens of clones so they are basically everywhere. Wesker’s base is huge, but they still make sure to do a number on it.

Unfortunately, this is where things get dicey. Wesker blew up all of the clones along with the facility thanks to his big self destruct button. The real one was with him in the copter, but they still “died” with the explosion. It’s all right for Wesker to live since he’s super human, but it’s a little dicey for Alice. It’s not a huge thing since I’ll just assume that the cure wasn’t 100% effective on her, but it’s still a little iffy.

I wish that the opening could have lasted for the entire film because then it would have been incredibly epic. Instead we got to see Alice lose her powers and we went back to the old status quo. Earth is still doomed and there’s basically no way that we can stop it. At least we got to briefly see what Resident Evil could have been like!

If Alice had kept her powers, then the film would have saved itself from the hole that I’m about to mention. Wesker was way too powerful for the heroes. That’s the sad truth and he’s completely destroying them in the ending. They only win through a great amount of plot hax and events that you may see, but not believe. There is no way that these humans could take him down and he’s far too fast to be hit. His healing factor is also very advanced so they can’t keep him down. I dare say that the plot hax was worse than Naruto’s battle against a pirate in the Shippuden boat filler episode!

The ending is pretty solid and it upholds the tradition for Resident Evil. They always know just how to end the film on a high note. The heroes appear to be completely doomed, but they’ll probably make it out alive…somehow. It’ll be interesting to see how they pull this off since they’re so outnumbered.

Time for the usual violence issue. This is Resident Evil so people blow up, get slashed….and die! They try to keep the deaths unique so we can get different visuals, but they ultimately look the same in the end. We also get the animal violence as per usual, but it’s arguably worse than the norm. The zombie dogs grow more and more deformed with each film and they’re barely recognizable in their new forms. This is definitely not the way to win brownie points with me on how to make a good film! This film isn’t for the faint of heart, but the disclaimer should have given that away!

For once, I don’t remember any fan service. There was a scene that likely worried people in the audience, but that tragedy was averted. Unless I’m forgetting something, that’s pretty nice of the film to fix that issue. The soundtrack is still good, but it’s not as memorable as the first films. It was good, but I’d have a tough time trying to recall any specific themes. Still, it beats the average film and that’s always worth some points.

Overall, as far as Resident Evil films go, this one wasn’t bad. Apocalypse was better, but this one beat Extinction. It’s a little tricky when you compare this one to the first film, but I think that Afterlife has the edge thanks to the intense action scenes and Wesker. The slow motion in the beginning dragged out a lot, but I do like the effect overall. If used correctly, then it helps the scene. This is the second best film in the series so far and that’s pretty good. The action was fun and the series went more into the superhero realm. Although, Animal Violence and regular violence along with the zombies help to keep the series firmly planted in its score. So, I’d sooner recommend that you check out the original Final Fantasy film if you want to see something scary!

Overall 2/10

Resident Evil Extinction Review

Posted on March 8, 2014 by dreager1

Resident Evil may not be the greatest film series out there, but I will admit that the posters for this installment were pretty good. It was a tough call between this one and “Project Alice-Activate,” but I believe that I made the right call. Can the film possibly match up to its usage of one of the greatest titles of all time? I don’t think so!

All right folks, you’ve heard it all before. Zombies are among us and the heroes are powerless to stop them. Well, things are a little more dire than they had been because Humanity is essentially extinct. There are still humans around, but instead of a few billion, we’ve probably got around 1000. That’s a number that I constructed out of thin air since they don’t really tell us, but if the water has evaporated in many oceans…how will the humans stay alive? Most of the world is just one giant desert at this point.

There are two main plots that merge by the end. Alice is on her own and she must continue to travel while remaining undetected by the government that is trying to track her with a satellite. Meanwhile, Carlos, Claire Redfield, and LJ are still around. It’s unknown what happened to Jill, but I’m sure that she’s busy defeating zombies. The three “heroes” are trying to survive in a desert along with many expendables and one shot characters. They are attacked by a large number of zombie crows, which quickly reduce their numbers. Alice saves them with her new abilities and decides to join their ranks. Unfortunately, this brings along the Umbrella group and all of the zombies.

I won’t say which characters survive this assault, but it’s definitely not a large amount. Their only glimmer of hope is a book that someone left behind. It circles a lot of locations and the heroes immediately realize that the meaning is obvious. There is an area of land that the zombies have not found yet! The group prepares to head out, but they will have to deal with a monster!

Alice is still the main protagonist, but she doesn’t look as good as she did in the last film. Sure, she is vastly stronger than she was, but power doesn’t always equal greatness. It’s impressive that she can destroy someone with a kick, but it doesn’t change the fact that she was knocked out by mere mortals. She handles herself pretty well for the most part, although she should have won with less effort. All of that said, she’s still the best character in this film by a long shot.

Next, we’ve got LJ. He’s definitely a shadow of his former self and I can’t even say that he’s a likable character anymore. He was funny in the last film, but not in this one. He looks pretty weak as he’s overpowered in a surprise attack from one of the zombies. That’s one character who couldn’t stay cool.

We’ve also got Carlos, but he has the same problem as LJ. It’s to a lesser extent, but Carlos isn’t as cool either. He’s not the seasoned veteran that we remember from the good ole days and he doesn’t know when it’s time to take the win. He takes down a lot of zombies, but it’s not very spectacular. Still, he wasn’t a bad character and that’s what counts.

We also get some new characters, but they’re not extremely important to the plot so we can essentially skip them. Wesker appears, but it’s in a very small role so he barely needs to be mentioned. I will say that he’s pretty cool in this film and definitely the best villain. He keeps the other villains in line from his hologram for a while. Any scene with Wesker was typically epic and we also got some great tunes during that moment.

Isaacs is the main villain of this film, but he’s not very exciting to watch. He also doesn’t make for a great villain because he’s weak and generically evil. He gets a power up towards the end of the film, but it doesn’t help him become a better villain. Power doesn’t save the day, only will power and determination can truly stop the zombies.

Now it’s time to get into the multitude of negatives for the film. First off is the obligatory fanservice scene. This time it takes place in the very beginning of the film as a clone of Alice goes through the same events from the first film until she dies against the defenses. It’s one of those moments where you can’t help but sigh in disbelief. Having this scene for three films in a row is definitely a bit much.

Next up, would be the violence. The first two films were already extreme, but this installment brings it to a whole other level. It’s what I would expect from something like The Walking Dead. Also, it contradicts the fact that their blood should be frozen or more solid like in the first two films. Nope, in this one we get large spurts when they are destroyed. Additionally, Alice uses swords a lot more in this film so that gives the film an excuse for the added violence.

The crow scene is also tough to watch because it mixes the overwhelming violence with animal violence. That’s definitely a losing combo in any form of media and it definitely did not help the film. We also get more dog violence to destroy the film even further. Basically, we had every kind of violence that you would expect from a zombie film and too a high level. That’s reason enough to back away from this film.

One negative that is introduced in this film is a very boring background. The second film had the city as a backdrop which was awesome and the first one was in a cool lab. This film largely takes place in the desert and that’s one of the worst areas that you can ever be in. It means that every scene will lose some interest points and that every area looks the same.

Well, at least the soundtrack is still good. The techno theme that occurs when the villain base appears is very good and it’s a highlight. It’s really the only memorable theme from this film so it has fallen, but it’s still good. One great piece of music can save an entire soundtrack if it is performed accurately. The ending is also pretty intense. Resident Evil typically has great endings so that was to be expected. The ending definitely implies that the next film will easily be the greatest in the franchise. Is that what happens? Well, we’ll be finding out very soon!

Overall, this was the worst Resident Evil film so far. The cast of characters, soundtrack, and amount of negatives were all worse than the first two films. This one didn’t have any great fight scenes (Although the last one was a good display of super powers) and Jill disappeared for no discernible reason. It has been years since the last film, but they could have at least made a reference. I definitely would not recommend this film due to the animal violence and large amount of negatives. If you want to watch a film that promises danger and excitement, then check out the original Transformers G1 movie!

Overall 2/10

Resident Evil Apocalypse Review

Posted on March 7, 2014 by dreager1

*Disclaimer, this is a review of the edited version of the film so that it is TV-14. The uncut version would likely get a lower score*

It looks like it’s time for the sequel to be reviewed! Well, after the first installment in the movie franchise, we can expect that the soundtrack will still be excellent. Will the rest of the film manage to surpass the original or is it doomed since it’s a sequel? Looks like it’s time to find out!

The film takes place immediately after the first one and we even get an early scene to show us what happened before the ending. Scientists quickly head into the facility that Alice and friends were in, but they’re overpowered and the zombies escape into the cities. We jump into the near future and see Alice grab her shotgun and get ready for some action. Meanwhile, the zombies take over the city and the Umbrella corporation shuts off the area. There are a few different plots at first, but eventually they all merge together.

Jill is one of the top notch officers of the city and she takes out a few zombies with ease as she heads to the outer perimeters of the city. Unfortunately, Umbrella quickly locks it down and they have their men shoot at anyone who gets too close. Meanwhile, Carlos and his team of trained professionals try to take down as many zombies as they can. Unfortunately, they realize that Umbrella has abandoned them and now they must try to live through this. Finally, LJ is just trying to live through this. He didn’t start this fight….but he may just survive it!

The plots are all completely separate at first. After all, this is a pretty big city and having a few different subplots makes sense. Eventually, Alice, Carlos, and Jill meet up with LJ and they prepare to leave the city. The only way out is through a helicopter, which is there to take away a few government officials and Nemesis. A scientist will tell them where the helicopter is once they rescue his daughter. His daughter is currently hiding out at a school, but that area may not be safe for long!

Alice is pretty intense in this film because she finally has her memories back. That’s a pretty good boost by itself, but Alice has also gotten superhuman abilities thanks to the experiments that were done. She’s essentially the strongest character in the series now right? Well, she does get a super enemy of her own to fight. Alice is a seasoned pro in this film and it’s always good to see that. It may be hard to call her a hero, but it’s definitely good to be her ally.

Nemesis is the final boss of this film and his abilities are definitely comparable to hers. He may be physically stronger than Alice, but they are nearly equal in that area. Alice’s big edge is definitely her speed and she’ll need it since Nemesis comes equipped with a handy rocket launcher/missile launcher. There is a big twist about Nemesis, but you’ll already know it if you saw the original film.

Including Jill in this film was pretty cool since she’s essentially the only Resident Evil character that I knew aside from Wesker and Chris. Unfortunately, while she does look great in her first appearance, she’s quickly out shined by Alice. Jill is only a human so it’s not inaccurate that Alice would outperform her, but Jill could have looked better. She was essentially a non factor during the second half of the film. She could have learned a few things from Chris.

Carlos was another one of the main characters and he’s also human. The big difference is that he still looks really good. He’s not at Alice level, but he takes out around 100 zombies and many of the guards who protect the helicopter. He was the best human character in the film and he was how I picture Chris Redfield to be. I thought that he was Chris for a while there. He held out against the zombies for a while and that’s no small feat for a man with a gun.

LJ is the surprise hit of the film. This guy definitely plays for keeps and he gets some of the best scenes in the film. At one point, it’s LJ vs Nemesis. All I’ll say is that LJ is confirmed to be in the sequel; can Nemesis say the same? LJ has a pair of golden guns and he’s prepared the whole time. He adds some comedy that the film really needed and it’s actually decent comedy. Not something that you typically see in any action film, much less a zombie film. He also owns a Cadillac, which is easily the greatest car company of all time. He confirms this towards the end of the film, right before he completely pulls one over the entire cast. That’s what I like to see from new characters that want to prove themselves in an established franchise. Let’s not achieve a Giant Condor performance folks.

That’s basically all of the major characters. I could mention the main villain, but he’s as generic as they come. Let’s head into the holes, which unfortunately…always overpower the positives in this franchise. First would be the excessive violence issue. It’s to be expected since this is a zombie film and all of the characters use guns. That being said, it makes The Lord of the Rings look tame! You’ll be seeing zombies get destroyed in every way possible and a lot of humans are also taken out. Every scene is sure to come with a pile of violence.

The film actually goes a step further than the last one since we get significant animal violence. At one point, a few zombie dogs attack and you can probably guess what happens to them. I own a really cool, amazing, super dog myself so I find it inexcusable when dogs, or any other animal, get hurt in a film. As a famous man once said, “It’s disruptive, it’s undisciplined….” I completely took the quote out of context, but it works perfectly for this film. It’s unnecessary and completely destroys whatever score the film was going to get. Some series manage to survive through that like One Piece, but it has over 600 episodes to try and get away from that. This film only has around 90 minutes to make me forget…and I did not forget! One of the characters even insults the dogs and he’s quickly eaten. Why must the humans be as unlikable as the villains!? I can’t even……

Anyway, another unnecessary addition was the Alice fanservice scene. Why do we get one of these scenes in Every single film? I’m pretty sure that there is one of these scenes per film, but I can’t verify until I see the 5th film. The first 4 had them and that’s already sad. The excuse this time is that she was knocked out/died and taken to a research facility which pulled a Wolverine origin on us. After the scene is over and Alice has her outfit from the end of the first film, she quickly murders or gravely injures the staff that was there. It’s “hardcore” and all, but the first part could have been cut out. Why couldn’t she already be in full uniform instead of in stasis?

Are there any other negatives? Well, the rest is the more minor things, routinely expected to be in these films. These include: Zombies, Language, Unlikable characters, etc. That being said, the cast of characters was better than your average horror/slasher film so that’s some progress.

Let’s get back into the positives! The soundtrack was great as expected and this series continues to impress in that area. We get some perfect battle themes and a lot of cool sci-fi as well. The soundtrack is 5 stars and while Avatar may have gotten a Grammy for its soundtrack; it can’t hold a candle to this film.

Another positive is the fact that this film plays out more like a superhero film. That will continue for parts of the next film and the beginning of the 4th as well. Since Alice ~~is stronger than the MCU Avengers~~ is superhuman, she can do a lot of things that she couldn’t before. This includes her super speed and a large array of athletics. There’s even a pretty good one on one fist fight at the end with Nemesis. The fact that the whole film takes place in the city instead of in a facility is another major positive.

Overall, it’s better than the first film in some areas like the action and setting, but it also has some downfalls like the animal violence and fanservice. The franchise has potential to be a winner, but it’s probably going to take a reboot to generate a higher score. That, or just changing up most of the staff that is working on these films. I want something that’s more of a summer blockbuster with laughs and aliens. Make it happen guys!

Overall 2/10

Resident Evil Review

Posted on February 28, 2014 by dreager1

*Disclaimer, this is a review of the edited version of the film so that it is TV-14. The uncut version would likely get a lower score*

How can a film about people fighting zombies not be an instant global hit? We’ve seen what the Walking Dead did right? (Although, I’m sure that it was a one hit wonder. We won’t be seeing another Walking Dead with that much success) That being said, I’ve never liked any zombie film that I’ve seen or heard about. Zombies are some of the worst enemies that can appear in a film and their only competition would be Vampires of Werewolves. That being said, this film is based off of a video game, which is always cool!

The plot of the film involves a woman named Alice, although she is missing from the very first scene. The first scene starts out as most films start out. There are some employees who are having a good ole time and you may figure that this will be the feel good film of the year. This quickly changes when a vile is dropped and horror ensues. Meanwhile, with the real plot, Alice has lost her memories and she doesn’t have time to gather them as a team of trained professionals breaks into her(?) mansion and quickly take her to a secret passage. These guys want to get to the bottom of the tower so that they can shut down an A.I. that has gone rogue. Alice doesn’t fully understand what is happening here, but she goes along with them. (It should be noted that she’s not really given much of a choice) The group also runs across a police officer and another guy who has amnesia. It’s all pretty routine at first, but can these trained professionals possibly take down such an advanced computer?

Notice that I did’t mention the zombies. That would almost be a spoiler since they don’t arrive until we’re decently late in the film. The reason that it’s not a spoiler…is that zombies are the whole point of Resident Evil. It’s like when Godzilla doesn’t appear for a very long time in his Final Wars film. We all know that he will appear…it’s just a question of when. The zombies are what you would expect from this kind of film. They’re mindless, slow, but get a lot of help from plot hax and sheer numbers. Traitors in the midst of the heroes are also welcome additions to their army.

I should get into the negatives before I go into some of the other details and positives of the film. One negative will be the unnecessary fanservice scene. (Spoiler alert, we get one of those in basically every film. The 4th film may be the only exception, but I may have just forgotten something) The scene is likely there to make sure that I take some points away from the film, but there are classier ways to do that. The scene could have been worse, but it stays for way too long. Luckily it was just that one scene..sort of. The very ending can be a little dicey as well.

The other negative would be the sheer violence in the film. You can immediately tell why this film got such a strong rating when the laser scene pops up. Action violence will always be around in a zombie film, or any kind of action film. Still, the film goes way over the top in this area and that’s another way to take out some points. The scenes where they destroy the zombies actually isn’t extremely violent, (yet) but the zombies themselves look pretty gruesome. Whenever they bite one of the humans, it may make you wince a little.

There is also some unnecessary romance that involves Alice’s previous life. (Not literally, but before her amnesia) It’s not around for too long, but the scenes are pretty unnecessary and they’ll make you wince again. That’s essentially it for the negatives, but those are pretty critical. Let’s go to a happier section as I list the positives for the film!

The soundtrack is easily 5 star worthy. It’s one of the best soundtracks that I’ve seen in a live action film and it can hold its own against any other. It’s really cool to see the schematics of the base because we get a really cool theme going. It gives us a video game impression while also making the film 20% cooler. The ending theme of the film is also great and really makes you hyped for the sequel, no matter how much you liked or disliked this film. The soundtrack is just that good!

Another positive for the film would be the very ending. It’s easily one of the best endings in cinematic history. Not only does the ending pave the way for a sequel, but it shows us what the true scope of the zombie threat is. These guys are playing for keeps and it’s up to Alice to stop them once and for all. It’s really rare to see such an ending make it onto the big screen and it was a good move.

The film does have a final boss and this guy is more of a beast than a zombie. He gets stronger whenever he consumes another person and his abilities may be limitless at this point! He’s very durable and while he may not be completely bulletproof, he can definitely endure a lot of shots. Unfortunately, the way that the heroes beat him is pretty gruesome. Still, this guy was definitely a powerful final boss and he caused a lot of damage.

The real villain would be the Red Queen A.I. She was pretty cool and you could definitely sympathize with her if not for the fact that she murders everyone in her path. It may be the voice that makes her amusing, or the fact that she’s basically in control the entire time. She’s essentially the mastermind of this whole film.

Alice is the main character and she’s a decent protagonist. She doesn’t have her full memories so she’s not as powerful as she usually is. She learns how to fight during the later portion of the film and by the end, she seems to be at her peak once again. Can she truly stop the zombies with her shotgun? Well, we’re going to find out!

Matt is the police officer of the group and he even comes equipped with an emotional backstory. He’s a decent character as well and he does try to get to the thick of things. This guy is tough, but fighting zombies takes more than a handgun. (Unless the person in question is a trained professional) The ending will likely be pretty sad for his fans, but nearly every character in the film gets a sad ending as well. Matt is not alone!

One of the things that helps the film, is the overall atmosphere. It feels like a mystery while adding in some thriller and horror elements. The film did a good job of mixing the three of those together. This is essentially how I would picture a Metroid film if it came out. The atmosphere would be perfect for that kind of film.

Overall, this zombie film was better than the others that I’ve seen, but it could still use a lot of work. While the film had many pros, it had many cons as well. The violence was definitely over the top and unnecessary additions like the main character’s medical capture at the end definitely bring the film down. It’s definitely not the kind of film where you walk away with a big grin on your face. One also feels bad for the monsters. At least the edited version took out most of the language and the soundtrack is sill solid. I can’t really recommend this film, but you may enjoy it if you like zombie films and don’t mind the excessive violence. For minors, your best bet for a good horror film is to check out Batman Phantasm. I actually recommend that Batman film as a solid alternative to all horror fans! I will be reviewing the second film soon, which adds some more positives, while also falling into some new holes.

Overall 2/10

Pulse Review

Posted on February 24, 2014 by dreager1

Pulse is a horror film that deals with the dangers of the internet. Horror films usually do not draw high scores from me, but it’s still nice to see them give it their all. Maybe this will end up being one of the best horror films that I’ve ever seen. The concept is interesting and the film is actually pretty recent. Let’s see how it fared!

After a guy named Josh is quickly defeated in the library, the film lets you know that Mattie will be the main character. She’ll need to be tougher than Josh, since he gives up on life and dies pretty early in the film. Mattie has a few friends with her and they’ll try to figure out what happened to Josh, but it may be a losing battle. They have two clues to go on….his computer and red tape. Meanwhile, a guy named Dex happens to be around and he’s quickly pulled into the thick of things!

First of all, it should be noted that the villains are only mildly tough. They manage to overpower several of the main guys in the film and also defeat an old man. (The latter case is not confirmed, but the man was with his cart and then the cart comes back…but the guy is gone!) The ghosts were trapped in the internet by a “super” genius, but they escaped thanks to our local hacker, Josh. Once the ghosts are out, there’s no getting them back in.

Personally, I think that the heroes got off lucky. The demons from The Grudge and The Ring are far scarier and more threatening than these guys. These guys suck a person’s will into them so that the person ends up wanting to die. I don’t buy that kind of power. These guys must have had a very weak grasp on their will to live. (Bleach actually agrees with me in the latest chapters of the final arc.) The humans should have tried harder! The ghosts seem like they can also blow a person up by infecting them with a disease if they don’t succumb to depression quick enough.

There’s also a pretty neat counselor at the school, but one can tell that he is an expendable character. After he gives Mattie a pep talk about how ghosts aren’t real, he is attacked. I won’t say if he wins or not, but let’s just say that you can’t really call it a “fight”.

By the end of the film, almost everyone in the entire school has disappeared. Only a handful of people are left and one would think that the government would get involved. We’re talking about 100+ people disappearing in an instant and it actually reaches up to the millions area before the very end. The ghosts work pretty fast!

Mattie is not one of the better main characters. She’s all right I suppose, but she’s not quite as intense as the average main character. That being said, she’s much better than Josh. Josh is the first to go and hacking never ends well. Stone is another one of the main characters, but diving under the bed to hide from the ghosts may be a plan that he regrets.

Tim has the right idea as he hides out in his room with a lot of red tape. His only mistake is that he takes some of the tape off so that he can see what’s happening outside……….pretty big mistake. Douglas is the guy who originally trapped the spirits, but it must have been a fluke because he quickly hides when they escape. He actually survives and he’s still hiding in his closet which is surrounded by red tape. I guess we’ll see how long he can stay in the closet before having to make a trip to Wal Mart for some pizza and chips. He’s going to need food at some point! Dex is the “tough guy” of the group and he knows exactly what needs to be done. Unfortunately, he is faced off against the spirits of two little boys and it’s enough for him to take a few steps back. I won’t say if he gets through the predicament alive, but it’s an intense scene!

So, the film doesn’t sound that bad right now right? Maybe it’ll actually get a positive score! Well…..that’s not going to happen. It’s time to launch into the negatives of the film. The first big one involves…animal violence. Unfortunately, the film sunk to that low. It’s a pretty sad scene and it instantly destroyed a few points from the film. We see a cat who is in Very bad shape. It’s enough to give you an upset stomach to be honest. The cat was also locked in the closet and it’s a very sad and unsettling scene.

Another thing that doesn’t help its case is an unnecessary bath scene. They’re always unnecessary, but it’s still sad that they keep on adding those type of scenes. I’m sure that the films would get much better reviews and also sell more if they didn’t add those scenes. Just look at The Avengers!

I also can’t give this film a very good score considering how all of the characters are pretty annoying and unlikable. They are easy prey for the villains and they should have put up more resistance like the old couple who had a shotgun. Those guys knew the score and they were actually fighting against the spirits!

Overall, this is another horror film that I cannot recommend. It falls into the big animal violence and fanservice holes, which don’t bode well for it. I did like the ending since the Government is finally getting involved as they’ve gotten people to Dead Zones so the spirits cannot hurt them. (Spirits can only operate in places with Wifi) That’s a good first step, but I want to see what the human’s counter attack will be. After all, we do see Josh in the very end and the war is just getting started! The film got a pair of sequels, but I can’t say that I’m really planning to watch them. If you really want to watch something scary, then check out the final season of Yugioh GX!!!

Overall 2/10

The Lord of The Rings The Return of The King Review

Posted on February 1, 2014 by dreager1

The Lord of The Rings hasn’t had a good track record so far and this won’t be the movie that changes things. It ends the trilogy all right, but I’m afraid that it doesn’t end on a bang. That being said, get ready for a lot of shots at the movie series and many of them will be aimed at Frodo. If you like this film…then you’ve been warned!

The plot is essentially the same as always. Frodo and his friend are on an adventure to get to the mountain where they can burn the ring in the fire. That specific fire is the only thing that can melt the ring since it’s the area that created it. Frodo and Sam are still with Gollum, but can they truly trust him? Frodo clearly thinks so and he can’t be wrong…right!? There is also another plot where Aragorn and friends must defeat the villains! That may not be their original goal, but it’s what they end up getting ready for. A war to end all wars!!

All right, there are many negatives to be named, but we should start from the beginning. The film literally has one of the worst cinematic openings of all time and it was terrible. We get to see Gollum’s origin, but it certainly won’t help you gain respect for the character or the other guy that was with him. They both lack strength of character and you’ll find yourself shutting your eyes for the first time in the film. It won’t be the last time, but it’s definitely something to think about. It should be noted that this is the first Lord of The Rings film where I did not fall asleep for any periods of the film…a true feat!!

Intro out of the way, let’s talk about Frodo Baggins. He’s still the main character of the film and he’s as unlikable as ever. When he’s not betraying his best friend or falling into the darkness that consumes him; Frodo is usually getting knocked around by one villain or another. He’s easily the weakest willed character that I’ve seen in decades and he makes Bilbo look good. Frodo nearly destroys Sam because he wants the ring and then he’s quickly defeated by a large spider. Sam saves him, but then Frodo vaguely threatens him and snatches the ring again.

Frodo is terrible! Did I already say that? Either way, Frodo has his big moment at the end of the film where he finally arrives at the mountain…and trips. He’s far too weak to walk at all so Sam is forced to carry him to the top. Okay, Frodo’s still got a shot at keeping himself as an unlikable character, but not an atrocious one if he just throws the ring in the lava right? I’m afraid that Frodo lacks the strength for that and he falls into the power of darkness. After he puts on the ring, Frodo essentially cracks and shows his true villainous colors. He loses a finger for his decision and nearly loses his life as well. He may have lived, but not really, since he will not be going on a long adventure and I have a feeling that he shall never return from it. It’s hard to see why anyone would be Frodo’s friend at this point and he’s one of the worst characters that I’ve seen in ages.

Time and time again, Frodo proves that he is only interested in himself. He never makes a real effort to resist the powers of the ring and he doesn’t care about the thousands of casualties that would occur when he didn’t throw the ring in the lava. It should also be noted that he caused Sauron to notice him by freezing up and then fainting for no reason. The sooner that we forget about Frodo, the better!

I’m afraid that the fight scenes also didn’t do it for me. It’s not really the film’s fault this time since war fight scenes will never be any fun for me. It’s super realistic and not really enjoyable to watch. There is also a lot of plot hax involved and the heroes really didn’t stand a chance. They’re badly outnumbered and I just did not buy the outcome. It’s one of those situation where the heroes win…because they’re heroes.

Gandalf is still a pretty unlikable character. He’s supposed to be a very powerful sorcerer, but he can never fight when it counts. He actually engages in hand to hand combat like the rest of the warriors and that doesn’t really help him in the power department. He typically has a flashy entrance, but that won’t be enough to save him. He’s just too old for battle at this point.

Aragorn gets a big role and he must use his sword to help the heroes win the battle. He does this by threatening a large group of spirits and forcing them into the battle. The spirits are pretty powerful so it’s not bad for them, but how did the threats work? I like to think that they could have made mince meat out of him. They likely only went through with it because of the deal that they made. Aragorn gets a few plot twists and all, but we must remember that he is just a side character in the end. He left to get reinforcements and he nearly didn’t arrive in time to save the day!

We’ve also got the Wraiths and the leader is given a lot of hype. He definitely doesn’t deserve it since one good hit is enough to obliterate him. So much for being “immortal” eh? It was cool for the lady who defeated him, but it definitely won’t help his fanbase. More importantly, it means that I will likely never become a fan of this guy. His lack of power and speed disturb me.

Legolas and Gimli are still around, but there roles are shortened compared to the second film. Legolas is still a decent character and Gimli is still all talk. For Legolas, it’s hard to be a great character in such a film. I like the character that they were aiming for him to be and he beats most of the cast. Legolas is definitely a better character than Gimli and Gimli can never seem to back up his tough talk. There was also a King who went mad and nearly made the ultimate sacrifice, but it was unneeded and it would have meant that an innocent would perish. He’s definitely not a heroic king, but I hope that you were not expecting one. He meets his end with a blazing glory!

There are other characters of course, but you get the jist of it. This is a film where the cast isn’t really likable. Bilbo gets no respect to the very end and his last line heavily implies that he still lacks strength of character. He still wants the dark powers that the ring has and that’s not a great way for him to go out. The lady who destroyed the Wraith was a decent character, but remembering her name is a little tricky. Needless to say, it’s the character that matters…not the name! There is still no character in this film that I like enough to call myself a fan. Unfortunately, nobody is quite that intense!

There isn’t much of a soundtrack in this film and that can be a little sad. One of the few positives that the first film had, was the music. The film is still way too long for it’s own good. Usually, it would be great to see a movie that is over 150 minutes, but not in this case. If 2 hours of the film had been cut, then maybe it would not have dragged out so much. Unfortunately, that is hard to say for sure. I’m not sure if I mentioned the graphics yet, but they’re about as bad as the first two films. This feels more like an 80’s film than one that came out in the 2000’s. I don’t know who the director is, but I definitely would be wary of his next film.

There is some romance at the end of the film that is quickly thrown in. It happens very suddenly and you will expect that the writers just wanted you to exit the film on a happy note, but it wouldn’t succeed. The film made sure that this wasn’t possible as the final, final scene involves Frodo as he ditches his friends once again. He does not tell them that he is leaving since he can’t be bothered with such things. He’s definitely a hero all right………

So…was there anything good about this film? There must be, since it didn’t get a 1 or a 0! Well, I can’t really think of anything good about the film. It isn’t a 1 or a 0 because it would have to be a lot worse to earn one of those scores. Rest assured, the film does not have a cliffhanger so we don’t need to worry about a sequel. (Sure, he says that the adventure may not have ended, but it’s basically ended. He’s not going to have another big journey)

In the end, I did not like any of the Lord of The Rings films. When a film has a giant spider that can actually defeat the main protagonist, but is still a pretty unlikable character…then you know that the film series is doomed. I can safely say that it is one of those classics that is not actually good and it’s easily a weaker group of films than the live action Super Mario Bros film. Why did the films get such low ratings and how did I come to have such a low opinion of them? There are many factors, but they mainly involve realism and length.

The films are all way too long and it shows. We get many scenes that are dragged out to impossible lengths. Still, the worst part of the film may be how realistic it can get. I never like things to be realistic and especially if it means that we’ll be getting boring fight scenes. We get a lot of those since the only good fight scene in the entire trilogy was the Gandalf vs Balrog battle. It’s really hard to care about any of the characters throughout the trilogy and it could be because of their lack of morals.

This is a “realistic” war film so none of the characters have any qualms about destroying whoever gets in their way. The films aren’t extremely violent by any means, but due to the length of amount of zoom ins that we get, it actually feels more violent than films like Terminator or Jaws. (I would say Alien, but that is definitely debatable!) The tone of the film doesn’t really help either since you’ll never walk away from the film feeling like you just saw something epic like Man of Steel or fun like the Avengers. You just leave and wonder what happened to the last few hours of your life. The gritty, realistic feel of the movies may be for some, but I’ll take the atmosphere and effects of the new Pac-Man show over this. Having something be so realistic just destroys the whole point of the film for me.

One of the big flaws for the trilogy is the fact that all of the humans seem to be weak willed. Gandalf refuses to hold the ring in the first film because he could not resist its power. If Gandalf doesn’t have enough will power, then that really says something about the whole franchise. They’re all weak willed and it’s easy to see how Sauron took over. I don’t see how the heroes ever had a chance. They’re definitely lucky that Sauron is only about as tough as a mere mortal.

Overall, the trilogy has come to a conclusion! As much as I did not like the first film, it only went downhill from there. The second film wasn’t as good as the first and the third was much worse than the second. I would say that things continue to spiral downwards, but the Hobbit was better than this film. I shall be reviewing that one in the near future. Needless to say, I doubt that I’ll ever watch this film again and I really don’t recommend it. Don’t trust the reviews for this film! It’s legendary, but it’s mostly nostalgia at this point and it’s a classic that many feel like they have to like it. It doesn’t actually warrant the high ratings that it gets. If you like war films and autobiographical movies, then you may like this one. If you’re looking for an epic war film, go watch the first Bleach film!

Overall 2/10

Star Wars Episode IV A New Hope Review

Posted on December 9, 2013 by dreager1

Star Wars is a pretty huge franchise and you will have definitely heard of the franchise at some point during your life. The franchise is huge in just about all areas including: Video Games, a popular TV series, many comics, and the large film franchise. The series may not have had over a dozen films like some other series, but each film has grown to be very popular. I saw this film many years ago and after re watching it, I can definitely say that I liked it more than the first time around. There’s a lot to say about a classic film such as this one, but let’s get into the plot first.

This film mainly deals with the adventures of two characters who go by the names of Luke Skywalker and Han Solo. In this film they are typically featured in the same scenes, but they do have their own story lines that continue through this film and the sequels. I’m sure that most of you know the basic plot of Star Wars, but I’ll give a little recap just in case. The Empire is basically in charge of the galaxy and you can call them The Empire. They’re more corrupt than the average government and there is a small group of rebels who currently oppose them. Unbeknownst to all of this, Luke Skywalker dreams of leaving his planet and going to where his friends now reside. His uncle is against the idea and he constantly tries to show Luke who’s boss, but it’s to no avail.

Luke ends up going with C-3PO to find R2D2, but he is attacked by the sand men. Ben Kenobi saves them and reminds Luke that he has a duty to help him save the universe! R2D2 delivers a message to Kenobi and they realize that they must get the schematics of the Death Star to the Rebels and also free the princess. Luke’s uncle may not approve, but he’s quickly annihilated along with whoever was still in the village. Luke takes this chance to go with Kenobi and they head off to stop Darth Vader and the Death Star!

Please understand that this is a very rough/abridged version of the plot. Star Wars is a film that does a good job of fitting a lot of plot points into one scene and you can tell that this was the start of a franchise. There are numerous characters and scenes that could lead to future plots and they’re all fairly interesting. The first scene where Darth Vader and the Storm Troopers take on the army is pretty fun and definitely holds up well. This may be a 70’s film, but they certainly knew how to use their budget and clobbered the effects from the Star Trek films. (Pre reboot and even then, they make it close to the first one)

Darth Vader has always been one of my favorite Star Wars characters and this film definitely shows me why this is true. He completely outranks all who oppose him and he never backs down. None of the good guys really seem to be a match for him and he creates a feeling of dread whenever he appears. He seems to work for a human in the Empire, but it’s hard for the believer to…believe this! Darth Vader is much stronger than any of the other villains since he can use the force and is very experienced in its use. He demonstrates how he can choke a person with it and use telekinesis. This is one character that will definitely be sticking around for a long time and his character design will stay awesome as his helmet is unforgettable.

Luke Skywalker is one of those characters that I’ve always liked and I barely know why. It may have been from when I saw the Clone Wars animated film, but I’m not completely positive. Either way, it definitely wasn’t this film that did it for me. Luke is definitely not a bad character, but in this film he’s still a novice when it comes to the Force and he’s not a character that really stands out. He’s a hero through and through, but there really isn’t much too him. He’ll get a lot of character development through the sequels, so we don’t really need to worry about him. He’ll definitely have his moments at some point.

Han Solo is a pretty good character for the most part and he’s a lot more charismatic than Luke. He’s definitely not as heroic and noble as he is still a bounty hunter. He seems to have gotten in with the wrong crowd and getting out isn’t very easy. He’s not a complete hero, but we are led to believe that he’s a good guy deep down. He ends up getting attached to the other good guys and slowly starts to turn towards the good side as the film goes through. He flirts a lot during the film and Princess Leia continues to use him and Luke. If not for the flirtations, Han would easily be the best hero in the film. He’s a good pilot and his ship is pretty fun to watch since it can definitely fly at high speeds!

Princess Leia is one of the big characters of the film as well, but I can’t say that she was quite as likable as the other characters. I believe that she tried a little too hard to be the real “tough” character and it didn’t translate so well. I never really comment on acting ability and I don’t intend to start now, but she did seem to overact a little unless it was part of her character. When Princess Leia would talk, her eyes would always be opened very widely and it looked a little puzzling to say the least. That being said, it’s more of a positive than a negative. At least Leia is a hardened professional and her gun skills are…..better than the Storm Trooper’s! I can’t say that I’m a fan of her, but she’s far better than some of the other characters coming up.

To spare myself from wincing, I’ll be shorter with these characters coming up. Let’s start with R2D2 and his pal, C-3PO. R2D2 can get really annoying as the film progresses since he can’t talk and is constantly getting the characters in trouble. He’s pretty mean to the heroes when he needs to be and he just won’t listen to reason. C-3PO is the comedy character, but he’s not really funny and he makes the effects feel dated. The effects are quite good, but his character looks pretty clunky. This could be intentional, but I’m not sure and he’s a pretty sad character. We’ve also got Chewbacca and his “roar” can quickly make you turn the volume down. I can barely imagine hearing that sound in theaters, it must have been ear splitting! He’s a pretty annoying character, but I suppose that he’s not awful. He’s definitely better than the two droids, but he doesn’t really add anything to the table. If he had not been in the film, I doubt that anything would have changed.

We can’t forget about Ben Kenobi…or should I say, *Spoiler Alert*Obi Wan Kenobi!!!!! He’s the wise man who was very tough in the past and he wants to make sure that Luke doesn’t make the same mistakes that he did. He knows a lot of neat tricks with the Force, but he is no longer able to fight as well as he could. He gave Darth Vader a decent fight, but Darth Vader was hardly trying and they were definitely not in the same league. It’s good that he tried and he was actually a decent character. He may not have been around for very long, but he gave Luke a reason to fight. Let’s see if it helps him in the next film!

I nearly forgot to mention the Storm Troopers! Their aim was about what I expected and it is fun to see them miss targets at very close range. The heroes are usually right in front of them and the Troopers will still find a way to miss. That being said, their uniforms are pretty cool and they never back down from a fight. These fighters have a Lion’s Heart and they’re some of the best cannon fodder that I’ve ever seen. The Chitauri could learn a thing or two from these guys. It’ll be interesting to see how they deal with the Jefi in the upcoming films.

As stated earlier, the effects for this film were pretty good. The beam fights were fun and the Lightsaber will always be a very cool weapon. The Force seems to have almost unlimited power and it really comes down to will power, but it also makes for some cool visuals. Seeing the Death Star take out a planet was also pretty awesome and a solid way to make the weapon threatening.

To throw my two cents in on the Star Wars vs Star Trek debate, I’ve always been on Team Star Wars. I prefer the characters, video games, TV shows, and comics. Filmwise, it’s a little harder since the latest Star Trek film was so good, but once I watch the other Star Wars films, I’m confident that it will pass Star Trek. The Clone Wars may have already given Star Wars the edge, but this will make it certain. Star Trek is still a…..interesting take on the Sci-Fi genre and the last film was quite good, but Star Wars definitely has the edge. This is the stuff of legends and Boba Fett hasn’t even appeared yet!!! (Jango Fett is also pretty awesome in the Bounty Hunter video game)

Overall, this was a very solid start to a great franchise. It’s easy to see why Star Wars was such a great hit as this film avoids the mistakes that most other films make. This film is pretty fun and it definitely goes by pretty quickly. Luke has not hit his stride yet, but just wait until the next film where the stakes increase and we start to reach the climax. I’ll have a review up for that film in the near future to continue the Star Wars streak!

Overall 7/10

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