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Much Ado about Nothing Review

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I’ve often considered Shakespeare to be the most overrated writer of all time and I’m afraid that this film did not change my mind on that. The writing style just doesn’t really work as the old time English get tiring rather quickly. All the witty banter is a little too forced with none of the conversations actually sounding natural. The movie can make for some ironic amusement but that’s about all that you’re getting out of this adventure which quickly overstays its welcome.

The film starts with Pedro, Benedick, Claudio, and John riding into a small town. They have arrived after glorious conquest and look forward to being treated like royalty. After all….that is precisely what they are. Claudio falls for a girl named Hero and they quickly get ready to be married. Benedick is mad about this because he thought that Claudio would be an eternal bachelor like himself. So the guys get together to set up Benedick with Beatrice who always mocks him. The two of them have been verbally sparring for a long while but perhaps this can turn into romance. What they don’t realize is that John aims to end these romances. He wants to cause a lot of chaos and is ruthless in his approach. Will he be able to so easily tear these alliances apart?

Of course the whole film’s premise is based on the fact that he can which shows just how weak these romances are. Lets start with Claudio and Hero here. Basically John shows “Hero” cheating on Claudio with someone else. Unfortunately Claudio could not tell that this wasn’t the real Hero. I think that’s pretty rough in itself since you should clearly know what your girlfriend looks like. If it was so dark that you could not see clearly at all, then you either rush to the door and ask for Hero or ask her the next day. Being completely tricked is certainly the worst out of all the options here.

Claudio naturally throws a big fuss about it but what’s worse is that he doesn’t give Hero a chance to talk at all. He just storms away and destroys her reputation which seemingly causes her to die. Then as an apology he prepares to marry a relative of hers. That’s already a rebound but it’s also a terrible apology in general. There was no saving Claudio at this point and honestly the whole thing isn’t a great look for Hero either. At that point if this is how Claudio is going to act, she should have just moved on. Not just giving up or being passive and seeing how the situation was going.

Beatrice had more of a real reaction as she wanted to murder Claudio and convinced Benedick to do it on her behalf. I appreciate that from a family standpoint but of course on a romance one it did end up hurting the ship. It showed after all that she was only with Benedick by this point so that she could manipulate him and the love itself felt very weak at best. I much preferred when they were just bantering with each other. To so easily be manipulated into liking each other by the supporting cast makes them all look like deeply unserious characters. It’s as if they were so pleased at the other being secretly in love that they were willing to overlook everything else.

John gets more credit here because as a villain he was actually fairly effective. It didn’t take long for him to infiltrate the ranks and really split everyone up. Ultimately once the heroes turned on him the guy didn’t put up much of a fight but he still kept them all on the back foot. Pedro was a decent commander but also someone who was easily fooled and got very emotional. In general I guess you could say all of the characters were driven too strongly by their emotions.

Like I mentioned before, the way they all talk gets old really quickly too. I get how it feels really dramatic and all but the old English takes forever to get through. You’re basically begging the characters to get to the point of their speech instead of taking forever. You also have the subplot with the guards who have no idea what is going on and their scenes really tend to drag. It goes from potentially being funny to you just rolling your eyes by the end because you know that it’s just not going to end.

The film could have really done well to be about 30 minutes shorter but that still wouldn’t have saved it. The movie doesn’t help itself with a super rough opening either as all the women in the village get ready to meet the men and look desperate in the moment. The fanservice was bad enough but do they really have to go so all out for these guys? Desperation is not really going to be a super attractive trait here and it’s another one of those old time dynamics that just doesn’t work. If you’re desperate for any guy to pick you, then there’s nothing really romantic about that. By the end of the film you are supposed to feel happy for the two couples and yet you can’t help but feel like they won’t really have a happy ever after.

Overall, This film absolutely needed some big time action. It needed the characters to get some real fight scenes and for the individual characters to also not be so weak. You’ll see various characters pinned to the wall and threatened while they can barely react in retaliation. None of them really have a whole lot of honor left by the end as they get thrown into every conflict. They also aren’t interesting enough to hold their own stories. I dare say this kind of film would only work as a parody because it feels like one for a while until you realize just how seriously the characters are taking themselves. A romance film without any understanding of what a true romance is will always be doomed to fail.

Overall 3/10

Moonraker Review

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Moonraker continues the James Bond marathon as we actually get some sci-fi elements this time around. Personally I would say it does continue with the classic Bond vibe despite this. To me this is a very familiar kind of adventure so you shouldn’t worry about the space stuff feeling a bit off. The climax is certainly explosive to be sure but it’s not even one of the longer Bond climaxes.

The film starts with Moonraker, a space station being taken by a mysterious foe and so James Bond is called in. James Bond is known as 007, the top British secret service operative in the entire world. He also has a license to kill as needed. Surely Bond should be the man for the job, but it turns out that M16 isn’t the only agency interested in what’s going on in space. The CIA send in an agent named Holly and this provides Bond with someone that he can finally show off for. Bond is usually one step behind the villains and get clowned on consistently, but tends to fare better with other agents. Can he keep his mind on the task at hand or will his endless weakness for women be his demise?

Bond is one of those guys that you don’t really want in your corner. Yes, I recognize that he ultimately gets the job done but it certainly tends to be at a high price. A lot of bodies will roll by the time he stops the villain here and that is true in this case as well. You can’t always blame him for every event but it would be easier to sympathize with Bond if he wasn’t constantly distracted. The “romance” with Holly definitely won’t be impressing you as each one is just manipulating the other. There isn’t really any passion or development here.

It did lead to the best scene in the film though where Bond walks through her room and calmly disables every trap possible. It was one of the only scenes in a minute where Bond actually looked like the top ranked professional that he is supposed to be. That was absolutely impressive. I just wish we could see more of that Bond. In terms of fighting ability, Bond is pretty good without the film portraying him as invincible or anything like that. For example he is usually not going to defeat someone like Jaws and has to just try and get out of the area.

On one hand that is a good look for Jaws but not so much for Bond. Surely his mastery of the martial arts and other deadly forms of combat should be enough to make up for a strength difference right? This may just be an issue with the films not being more modern but Bond always seems to fight like a normal guy. He is always willing to step into the fight though so I’ll give him that and he does have a lot of confidence. You can always count on him to deliver with a strong one liner as needed.

I don’t like the guy but at least he has the charisma to hold a film. Meanwhile the heroine Holly is more proactive than some of the others. She may fall to Bond’s charms like the rest but at least she can fight. It would be smarter for her to carry a gun so that she can properly defend herself but at least she has a knife. I always like when they add in a second agency to these films so having her be from the CIA was a good move. Bond got to have a little backup in that way.

It was also nice to see Jaws return as the big villain here. He is definitely a true threat with how powerful he is. I do think his character switch at the end was pushing things though. I would have liked to have kept him as fully evil, just unwilling to listen to Drax out of self survival. That would have made more sense and unfortunately I wouldn’t have added his new girlfriend either since that whole plotline was too rushed. It just didn’t really make a lot of sense and someone like Jaws isn’t going to change so drastically in such a short amount of time.

Drax is more of a forgettable main villain. He’s definitely not very smart though with how easily he allows Bond to draw a rift between him an Jaws. You’d think that Drax would have been able to see through the bait but I guess he’s just not socially aware of what’s going on. Other villains wouldn’t have gone down so easily. Drax isn’t a fighter at any rate so he won’t end up being all that memorable anyway.

The action and special effects are good as always. The Star Wars type energy climax may come out of nowhere but it does look good so I can say that in favor of the film. The soundtrack isn’t particularly noteworthy but as always I do like the classic Bond theme. No matter how many times it plays or gets remixed, I’ll always find it to be pretty impressive. If the film could just stay away from all the fanservice and rushes romances then this could actually be a good series. Unfortunately as it stands, the Bond films tend to all get absolutely crushed when you’re watching them.

The film also gets some props for being long but never feeling all too drawn out. The action is consistent and the different set pieces are all unique so it’s not like the film starts blending into itself either. The pacing is good and the writing is nice. I always like when Bond bumps into another M16 base and all of the big shots happen to be there. In a way it feels like magic with how quickly they set everything up but I’ll chalk it up to their intelligence gathering truly being first rate.

Overall, Moonraker is one of those films that I wouldn’t recommend but it’s not as if it is significantly worse than the average Bond film. On the contrary it holds up to the others just fine and the space climax really isn’t bad. It’s just a shame that this is known as the outer space Bond film and yet they don’t actually leave Earth for a good chunk of the runtime. If the film really wanted to be bold, it should have made the majority of it take place out there.

Overall 4/10

One Hundred and One Dalmatians Review

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This is one of those films where its reputation definitely precedes it. I dare say that the film even increased the popularity of the dog breed itself. It’s a movie that holds up pretty well with fun characters and solid pacing. It has quite a bit of action as well and a good amount of stakes. As long as you find dogs to be charming then you should have a good time with this one.

The movie starts with a dog named Pongo trying to find a wife for his owner Roger. Roger is always busy with his music and so the guy hasn’t made any kind of a real effort in order to find someone. Pongo doesn’t want this guy to end up being lonely so he takes Roger to the park and gets him married to a lady named Anita. Roger marries Perdita as well and they have a lot of cubs, but unfortunately the villain Cruella shows up and demands the puppies. Roger is able to block her but she has two hooligans break in to steal them anyway. The cops are unable to find any leads and so Pongo figures that it is all up to him and Perdita. Will they be able to catch the criminals or is this really game over?

As always with these classic Disney films, they do a great job with the color and vibrant tone of the world. There is always something going on here. The characters are very expressive and so the animation looks far better than something you would expect from the 60s. Although at this point I say that for a lot of old films so perhaps I just need to start thinking of the 60s as a great time for pure animation. The soundtrack is more on the forgettable side but you won’t see me complaining about the fact that they decided not to go the musical route with this one.

Pongo makes for a good lead because of his sheer confidence. It’s rare to see the main character being the one to play matchmaker. Pongo wasn’t embarrassed or overly shy; he was just out there getting results. That is exactly what you want to see from a character like this. He was also quick to fight when he had to defend the little pups from the enemies. All in all a very strong performance and he absolutely ends up being one of the more memorable leads.

Perdita also did well. She was right there with Pongo fighting off all of the enemies. While Pongo was the one with the plans, she was always there as good support. So she gets full credit all the way. The owners are a little less impressive, but hey that’s why they aren’t the main characters. Roger did well in standing up to Cruella even if he was super nervous the whole time. In his own house he really ought to be able to muster up a bit more courage than that. Perhaps I’m being a little greedy here.

Anita had less of a role but unfortunately it wasn’t a very strong one for her since she wasn’t taking Cruella’s threats very seriously. Cruella isn’t exactly a subtle character after all so you just have to follow your gut there. What Anita could have used was one really standout scene where she confronts Cruella and shows how aggressive she can be.

The romance may have been on the weak side but as it’s mostly off screen we can try to say that a lot of it was just not seen by the audience. I don’t have any big quarrels with it at any rate since it’s not a big focus on the film. Cruella appears far less than I would have expected though considering how popular she is as a villain. The design is certainly memorable and it can be nice to just have an overt antagonist like this. She has no dreams of helping the planet or some kind of random sob story. No, she just wants more fur coats and is willing to murder everyone in order to get it. That’s just her style.

Her two henchmen get a big role but they’re your general bruisers. They aren’t too smart and are just good at throwing things and picking fights. Technically that’s more or less all that you need for henchmen though so in a way I’d say they do their job well. They had accumulated quite a lot of Dalmatians as well although apparently the rest of the owners had just sold them so I guess that’s less impressive. Either way, it’s good that the main dogs could fight or this would have gotten real ugly real fast.

The puppies didn’t tend to be the smartest guys around but they’re young so I’ll cut them a bit of slack. It was also fun to see them all watching the cartoon early on in the movie. It was a rare chance for the characters to all catch their breath and we got to see some happy scenes as a family. Generally, in a film like this the plot is moving at all times so there isn’t much downtime. I appreciated having this scene before things got crazy. The movie also did a good job of showing how powerful community can be with every dog pitching in to help out and do their best.

Now while the soundtrack may have mostly been forgettable, I did enjoy the Cruella song near the beginning. It was a very catchy song and using all of the lyrics just to bash her was pretty fun. You get the feeling that Roger wouldn’t be brave enough to say it to her face but the thought is what counts here.

Overall, One Hundred and One Dalmatians is definitely a fun film. It’s the kind of title that has a lot of replay value and really goes by quickly. The characters are all handled well and the film’s animation is super clear. The movie never drags on nor does it have any real weak points. I could easily recommend this to anybody and it ends up being a really timeless film. It’ll be tough for the other Dalmatian films to try and top this one so we’ll see how that goes. In the meantime don’t let the 1960s date scare you, the film certainly doesn’t feel old and the writing is on point from start to finish.

Overall 7/10

Seven Pounds Review

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It’s time for a film about someone who made a massive mistake and wants to find a way to stone. Films like that can always get tricky because some things are just tough to atone from. Ultimately the answer the lead comes up with is not the right one and so the film isn’t able to stick the landing, although I wouldn’t say it had been all that good even up to that point.

The film begins by spoiling the entire film with its opening scene so I’m going to ignore that in the summary. Definitely a bizarre way to open up the film, it reminded me of Tomrorrow Land. Anytime you do this narrative tactic, it’s a bad idea imo. Tim works for the IRS and he has to collect from a number of individuals. Unfortunately they are all down on their luck with rough circumstances and medical/personal issues. Tim wants to see if he can help them but it won’t be easy.

This is one of those sad farm films where it just keeps on upping the ante of how bad things are getting. One lady is in an abusive relationship that is continuing to escalate. Without some escape she will be dead before long. Another lady is slowly dying from a defective heart, etc. Tim is only one guy so there is only so much that he can do. Time is also not on his side since these problems need to be fixed really quickly or it’ll all be over.

As the film goes on we learn about Tim’s backstory and why he is so reluctant to talk about his past. It definitely makes for a tragic origin, particularly with how avoidable it was. So this has given him a bit of survivor’s guilt and so he wants to help an equal amount of people to how many died in the accident. It’s a noble goal but the issue is that he has completely devalued his life now as he feels like it doesn’t matter.

I wouldn’t say that the film handles this particularly well. Ultimately he needed some characters to try and stop him but for the most part the only one who could have talked him out of it ended up being an accomplice. In a sense I don’t need the film to be the moral police here, as long as the viewer knows that it’s wrong to throw away their life then I don’t fault the film too hard for not making the case against it. A scene or two showing that Tim came to the wrong conclusion would have been nice though.

So as the film builds to the ending, it doesn’t do the movie any favors. The film’s ending just isn’t satisfying. However, the film was already sinking by adding a big romance plot early on with Tim and Emily. You need to remember that Tim had a fiancée before tragedy struck so this is moving awfully fast. A rebound romance like this was never going to work. Moreover, it doesn’t really feel like equal circumstances here as he basically saved her from being homeless by waiving the IRS fee and she knows that death is imminent.

I don’t think either of them are in the right headspace for a romance here and so the whole thing goes way too quickly. Emily’s not a bad character, it seemed like she was trying to make the best of it in terms of dealing with her condition. I give her a little more leeway here and tend to blame Tim more. He should have kept things professional while trying to look after her. As for his final decision, well it’s rough but it’s why you always have to talk with people about death early on. So they can cope with it and not try to change things. Everyone dies, some sooner and some later but the more you try to fight it off, the worse the situation will get.

The film is about Tim being selfless but since a lot of that is out of guilt, it’s hard to give him full credit there. As for the rest of his donations, well those are shakier but you can make an argument for them at least. There are times when self sacrifice works out and it’s a tough line to always follow. I won’t say there are easy answers here but either way it just doesn’t make this film a fun watch.

It is very melodramatic and sad throughout the whole runtime. Mix that in with the sad ending and you’re just wondering when you are supposed to be having fun here. Contrary to popular opinion, films are around to have fun with. If you aren’t having fun during a film, then it has lost sight of the ultimate objective here. The characters who got happy endings still had to go through a whole lot so everything always came at a price. Tim had to test a blind salesperson at one point to make sure he was worthy of recovery and the way he tested him was quite extreme with a lot of verbal abuse. The salesman handled it really well though. It’s hard to even imagine how difficult it is to live without eyesight. From the 5 senses I’ve always thought that would be the toughest one to live without.

Overall, 7 Pounds is really trying to test the limits of self sacrifice. In a way this is an interesting way to go about it but the movie could have absolutely done this with a lighter tone. I’d say it should have dialed back the scale of tragedy here and just focused on the main one. Have Emily be the only character who needs help and then the film can spend a chunk of time having Tim give arguments for why a sacrifice is needed here. The argument just can’t be one out of guilt. From there you have a pretty interesting film. Perhaps it may seem dry to some but I believe it would be engaging and you don’t need all the extra trauma. The movie would be way more focused at the very least. Still, that’s not how it played out so I would say to avoid this movie. It’s just a little too exhausting with how unrelenting the film can be with everything going sour for the characters involved.

Overall 3/10

The Little Prince Review

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This is probably one of those films I should be mor familiar with since the book was a big deal but for the most part it really got past me. It’s a pretty decent adventure although at times it can be so focused on the slice of life aspect that it almost gets a little dull. The slow moving nature of the story is what keeps it from being just a little bit higher. I would still recommend it though if you’re looking for an abstract film about adventure. Also props to the film for never actually giving us all the names for the characters. Whenever a film does this organically where you don’t even notice, I gotta give a little shoutout.

The film starts with a girl and her mother moving into a new home. The mother has a very detailed plan for her daughter which accounts for every hour or every day for the next few years. The idea is that this way her daughter will be able to achieve her life’s dreams with no delays. Obviously this is done to a rather insane degree but it really shows how much her mother was thinking of her. Coming up with this plan had to have taken an incredibly long time. It’s sort of the old issue of worrying about your kid so much that you go a bit overboard and end up creating more work for them.

Well, her daughter aims to do her best at each task. Unfortunately their crazy next door neighbor launches a rocket which breaks a big hole into the apartment and this kicks off a series of events that lead the main character to stop following the schedule. She is much too interested in the neighbor’s stories about a young prince in space. the more hours that are used up, the more that the plan can no longer work. Should the girl continue going off script and hanging out with the neighbor or should she begin to get back on track?

I was glad that the film didn’t make the mother overly unreasonable. I think this is one of those situations where if the girl had talked to her more, they could have avoided some of the issues here. Instead by working in secret and dodging the schedule it caused things to get more tense than needed. The mom was trying her best and ultimately just lost sight of the big picture here while she was trying to help. It’s one of those issues where I can feel really sympathetic since sometimes you are trying to help a lot and things just don’t go the way you want them to. That’s just how these things go.

She was willing to readjust the plan to account for a friend after all. Having to totally discard the plan is a bit more of a difficult ask though. It’s why you usually want to let your kid find their own goals through exploration but when you’re really successful it can be easy to want to craft a good life for your kid. So yeah there are a whole lot of things to consider here.

As far as the animation goes, the film looks decent. The scenes on the human world look decently good. It may not be high-end, nor are there scenes to really test this out since this is a very realistic film but I would say that it works out pretty well. The dream sequences within the stories tend to be a little too experimental for my taste though. I’d say that’s a good part of why I would just want the film to return to the human world some more. The dynamic between the mother and her daughter was far more interesting to me even if the stories were more supernatural.

The neighbor was also decent but I don’t cut him too much slack here. Apparently, his inventions haven’t been working for a long while now. He should know better than to still be testing his rockets in a place where they could possibly hit someone. Blowing up part of the house was a gag but a situation that felt dangerous all the same. It could have easily gone lethal depending on where the girl was.

A large part of the film is about the story though so lets talk about that for a minute. The Little Prince had some sheep and flower friend, then he went off to journey through the cosmos. He met many people like a King, a wealthy guy, and more. Unfortunately the story had a sad ending where the Prince got poisoned and died so this leads the girl to try and find him in the real world. Now how much of this is figurative vs literal is up to you but of course I always like to take this at face value. It turns out that things have not gone well at all as the prince is now a janitor and has basically given up all hope. All of the figures from his story appear but in different circumstances than the story had suggested.

This leads to a classic story about not giving up hope and finding your way once again. The Prince eventually gets better but sure takes his time in doing so. There’s nothing wrong with the story itself but the plot on Earth just feels a lot more tangible. You can really empathize with what’s going on and the gravity of the situation. For the Prince plot, well it still feels like a story book even once it’s “real”. In a way the story book intro kind of doomed it. I think there would be a chance to get past that in a longer film where you had more scenes for the second act. This one just doesn’t have enough time for it.

You’ve still got a well written film and I certainly wouldn’t say otherwise. That said, it’s not going to have a ton of replay value here. The film is just too soft spoken for that. It’s a quiet kind of film that tackles good concepts that are worth discussing but you only need to do that once. After that there is no big spectacle or action scenes to carry it through. I should note that the film is also quite serious. Not dark by any means but there aren’t a lot of jokes here which is also something that could have helped the replay value.

Overall, The Little Prince is a good movie. I would recommend checking it out at least on an initial watch. It’s not like every film needs to be watched twice after all. It can be a bit slow but doesn’t really have any bad scenes. It’s a safe watch for just about anyone. If they ever make another film like this, I would say to either incorporate both plots so that they live in a world where there is a prince or go all in on one world or the other. There just isn’t enough runtime to really get into both. I would also forget the experimental type animation and go for something with classic hand drawn instead.

Overall 6/10

The Spy Who Loved Me Review

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It’s time for more Bond and this time he will have to deal with a rival who may even be on his level. The concept is definitely cool but as the film goes on, you realize that the rival is a paper one. I’ll explain more about that in a minute but needless to say this film still falls into the usual issues of a Bond film. Perhaps that is just the inevitable fate of most Bond adventures.

The film starts with showing us how both Bond and Anya are messing around despite being called the world’s greatest secret agents. Bond manages to murder a bunch of enemy agents as he heads back to base though. MI6 has called him in to find the missing nuclear submarine that someone stole from Russia. Naturally this is a pretty big deal since it is a national crisis. Russia has also sent in their best agent, Anya to find out what’s going on. Both of them will be crossing paths as they uncover the mystery behind this but can they keep their hands to themselves?

I do like the hook of finally seeing another secret agency in the forefront. Surprisingly the films don’t often do this. Sure, other agencies like the CIA are referenced but typically they tend to just get wrecked off screen. That said, the film doesn’t totally commit to the bit as Anya isn’t super skilled. Perhaps relative to some of the other agents but she consistently feels outmatched here. This is why I would call her a rival on paper.

So on paper Anya is a genius, master of martial arts, and her resourcefulness speaks for itself. She should be able to hold her own against anyone. Well, on the field it just doesn’t play out that way. She may be able to defeat Bond at times in word games like when she mentions where the submarine is. Additionally, she is able to defeat him by using his weakness to women and spraying him with a knock out gas. The whole thing was super embarrassing for Bond but when it comes time for a fight, she is dispatched quickly.

She allows Jaws to defeat her even when she had a gun on him and he was unarmed. When she crosses with Bond, she is pitting her karate chop against his gun. Anya just wasn’t ready for this and the fact that she can distract Bond with her charms just feels like a consolation prize at best. I would have liked her to have been out there in the field murdering a ton of fighters and really giving Bond a reason to respect her abilities. Considering the series we’re watching, this will probably only be possible if the rival agent is a guy.

As for Bond, well he looks pretty bad as always. The whole world is in danger with the nuclear weapons here and he’s still trying to make a pass at everybody? Bond needs to lock in at this point and he just doesn’t have enough moments like that. Bond is ready to have his fun and lose the mission which is not what you want a hero to do. I appreciate his smug attitude and how Bond talks down to everyone but it’s still hard to overlook his faults.

Meanwhile Jaws is a solid villain because of his skills even if he lacks the overall charisma that Scaramanga had. Jaws is shown to be borderline superhuman with how he can absorb so many blows. He walks away from a massive car crash at one point with essentially no injuries. Bond is clearly not able to beat him one on one but is quicker so usually the environment ends up being the deciding factor. Jaws mouth is metal after all which makes things difficult for him around magnets.

His boss is technically the head honcho but that guy doesn’t look all that good. I appreciate all the tough talk and how he dispatched several characters in the opening scene. He knows how to stay on top but ultimately gets a little too cocky. His gun needed to be quite a bit shorter to be effective and the trigger needed to be silent. The guy had an interesting goal of wanting humanity to only live beneath the waves though. I’ll give him some points for originality I suppose.

As always the film suffers from fanservice and terrible romances which distract from the main plot. In fact, this time it’s even worse because the plot is completely going against the romance. Anya’s whole plot is to avenge her fiancé but she’s messing around with Bond right away. You could try to defend this by saying that it’s part of her job and she’ll get with everybody in order to further the mission but that really doesn’t help at all. It just pushes forward the worst trope of a female agent which is having to do any of that stuff in the beginning.

Nah you need to be able to solidify her as a top tier threat who doesn’t need to do that. Bond never does either, he just does it for fun. That needs to be dialed back as well so that he can actually be a likable character. The film’s general pacing and story is good but these things hold it back quite a lot. The fanservice is unrelenting and is something you don’t see so much of outside of the Bond films. In a way that’s what makes it so notable here.

I should mention that the songs aren’t all that impressive for me. I didn’t cover that in the prior Bond film but generally none of the songs have moved me so far. They sound decent, I’m certainly not calling them bad. However, I would not be looking them up on Youtube or anything like that. They really lack a better beat or incredible lyrics that force you to rewatch them. These just feel like what you would expect from a Bond film tbh and I don’t really mean that in a good way.

Overall, This film had an interesting premise but didn’t live up to it in classic Bond style. I will always take a plot like this with multiple factions over not having them at all though. If you have liked the Bond films up to now then you should like this one as well. In a lot of ways it is playing the adventure completely straight and that’s not a bad thing for the most part. The series just needs a way to lose the fanservice and then it can one day rise up as one of the all time greats! Until then, it will have to be satisfied with being at the back of the pack when it comes to action/thriller franchises.

Overall 4/10

The Man with the Golden Gun Review

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James Bond has certainly has a lot of films over the years. While Bond himself may spend a good chunk of his screentime getting kicked around, he always rises back up to end the threat. I’m not typically a fan of his movies for their over-reliance on fanservice and terrible romances but the action scenes tend to be fun. The movies have a good blend of humor mixed into the fight scenes. This one also has one of the best enemies in the entire series. That being said, it ends up falling into line with a lot of the other films.

The movie starts with an assassin taking out a powerful gunman. This man is Scaramanga, the world’s number one hit man. His trademark is a signature golden gun by which he finishes off his prey. This guy’s next target is James Bond, Britain’s top agent from MI6. He has the agency so scared that Bond is immediately taken off of his mission and fired. The only way for Bond to get his old work back is for him to take this guy down but nobody’s even seen Scaramanga before. This won’t be an easy fight.

I will say that MI6 looks absolutely terrible here for them to panic so quickly. Yes, Scaramanga is a dangerous foe but this level of panic should be reserved for taking on a whole government right? For a single man to make them bench the #1 agent is crazy. I don’t think M could possibly come back from this. Fortunately Bond is quick to get out there and end this would be assassin. It’s the only real way to move forward if we’re being realistic about this.

Unfortunately, I wouldn’t say that Bond is a great character though. As always he is distracted by every woman around and he can never truly keep his eyes on the prize. He has to rely on his plot armor most of the time in order to stay in the game because there are many chances for him to be removed. The villains had him dead to rights but sent him to school instead of finishing him off. A bizarre decision to be sure.

He doesn’t take his coworker seriously either and spends the whole time flirting with her instead of trying to come up with a plan. Yes, Goodnight was a poor agent who just held him back but Bond should have still been able to find some way for her to be of assistance instead of adding onto that. Anytime Bond is fooling around with these various characters, it is more time that he could have spent staying in a ready position with his guard up.

Bond gets results which is why he is known as the number one agent but at the same time he nearly dies constantly. Personally in terms of overall skill I would have to lean on Scaramanga here. In a one on one fight I believe he would defeat Bond. You could argue that Scaramanga did not think so since he ended up evading the one on one fight for his more theatrical version. That ended up being a mistake on his part.

Scaramanga is a full on villain so you can’t let his gamesmanship fool you. He doesn’t treat his allies particularly well and was quick to bump off the girl who was working with him. She probably had the most tragic role here since there was really no way out for her from the start. Death was always going to be the end result and it’s not like Bond really helped her to get past that here. Ultimately he wasn’t in the best place to help her either since time was ticking and he didn’t really have anyone to trust. That said, you still could have hoped that things would go better for her.

You’d almost think this was the only plot around but the Bond films are always able to cram a lot of story into these adventures. So we also had Hai who hired Scaramanga and was working with solar technology that could end the energy crisis. He gets rather overconfident for somebody who can’t fight which results in his end though. Honestly he may have been doomed either way but the way he went out just made the guy look silly.

We didn’t really need this plot or the whole karate interlude though. Sure we got to see Bond score some more wins and take advantage of terrible villain plans but it didn’t actually move the film forward. Personally I would have spent that time further hyping up Scaramanga and maybe even having Bond do some training to prepare for the battle. It’s a bit hard to picture since both characters are extremely arrogant but would have been interesting. Their inevitable matchup is easily what you are looking forward to throughout the movie. Everything else is ultimately just noise.

So the negatives with the film all stem from the endless fanservice and one night stands here. None of the romances are worth anything and they’re just here to pad out the film. It’s why I always look forward to seeing a more serious Bond who is ready to take on the villains without fooling around. While the film is very long, I would say that the pacing is generally fine. There is always a lot going on so it doesn’t drag on. The fight scenes are also pretty good.

They feel rather old school with how they aren’t overly choreographed or anything like that. This is a basic fight with good hand to hand at all times. Bond also looks very mortal as he is stronger than the average fighter but isn’t the world’s best or anything. We even have a classic car chase which works well. The overactive sheriff may be a tad too silly for some but generally tends to be a fun character. The absurdity just works especially since the film as a whole was pretty light hearted anyway. He would probably overstay his welcome if the scenes were too much longer.

Overall, This film did a good job of finally giving Bond a true one vs one fight to look forward to. Sure, Bond does lose a lot and tends to be out planned by the villains but this is one of the few times where the whole film is building up to such an encounter. I appreciated that and while it couldn’t do enough for the film to beat out its own issues, this still made for a pretty memorable experience. If you really like Bond films then I would recommend checking this one out.

Overall 4/10

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga Review

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This review is of the TV-14 version. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for another Mad Max film which is naturally not going to go over very well. The franchise has never really managed to make a solid product and this one doesn’t do any better. It jumps straight to pure edge and grim-dark content right from the jump and never really gets any better. The plot itself is fairly thin with the film just being a bunch of padding on top of it. It’ll feel like a 4 hour movie by the time you’re done with it.

The film starts with Dementus’ gang invading Furiosa’s home and they manage to kidnap her and murder her mother. Furiosa is now forced to work for his gang for many years while trying to plot her revenge. Unfortunately, it won’t be easy because he just has so many different henchmen working for him. It’s like going up against an entire army. Dementus is the leader of his gang but even he has to answer to a larger force. This may be where Furiosa can have some hope to turn things around but it won’t be easy. Will she be able to mount a comeback or is all hope already lost?

This is a prequel so you know Furiosa will survive this but it’s more about the journey. How much will she lose before she is finally able to claim victory here? Well, unfortunately the film decides to have her lose quite a lot in the process and so we see just how messed up her life was in the apocalyptic world. Just about every character has been messed up in this timeline though as we’ve seen throughout the movies. There just isn’t any hope left.

The last semblances of authority were wiped out long ago. All that remains are an endless amount of gangs who rule through violence and terror. Forget about human dignity or anything like that. This is all about maximum suffering to everyone and it’s just villain against villain. As Dementus fights with the other group, you don’t have anyone to root for because both groups are equally pure evil. There will be no rest or recovery for either side no matter what happens. It’s true when they say there are no heroes in this film.

Furiosa is naturally a lot more sympathetic than the others running around but even she had to play the game for years. She had to fight under the villains’ banner and murders a whole lot of characters throughout. It would have been nice to have let her just be a full on hero even if it meant breaking the tone that the film was going for. Have her be some sort of super hero who goes around murdering the villains one by one. She could use a lot of run and gun tactics to whittle them down.

That would make for an infinitely more interesting film right away. It would be easy to root for her after all and it would mean less screen time for the villains. The film is incredibly violent so you can expect to be grimacing at every other scene. The whole society within this world is as grim as possible with slaves everywhere and every crime you can think of. The film absolutely succeeds at showing an evil society but never gives you any good reason to be watching the film. It’s like getting a peek into true evil without any large scale destruction at the end to help you feel at least a little satisfaction.

A scene at the end where the world gets destroyed or something like that would have been good. It’s certainly evident that the people who died during the great disaster were the lucky ones since they didn’t have to live through this new situation. Perhaps the films could one day have a twist where a human city does survive somewhere and they have kept law and order but I wouldn’t hold my breath.

Aside from the film just being tragic to sit through, it’s also incredibly long. The film just keeps on going on and on. It’ over 2 hours and the film absolutely feels that long with every scene taking forever. This is one of those films where I really can’t point to a single positive and so it’s one of the first 0s in quite a while. There are just no redeeming values within the title.

The whole film takes place in the dessert so there aren’t any real good visuals to be had here either. Everything is rundown and the characters are all dirty from getting hit with the elements all the time. A lot of characters tend to have big scars or other injuries to help reflect the ugliness of the world which doesn’t exactly earn it any points either. I can admit that this may be a realistic look at how things could be if humanity ever hits rock bottom. You like to hope that there would be some semblance of order left but there are absolutely areas around the world where this happens. So I can’t say that it’s impossible.

It just doesn’t make for a good film. At the end of the day the film is about Furiosa getting her revenge but it takes an extremely long time to even get up to that point. It would have been much more satisfying if the whole film was about her picking off all the villains until she got to the leader, rather than being forced to work for different villains throughout. Let Furiosa get more scenes where she has the advantage rather than trying to claim it after being the underdog the whole time.

Overall, I would definitely recommend skipping this film. At the end of the day it’s about a bunch of villains hurting everybody and the cycle of violence will perpetuate forever. The movie definitely tries to show you as much suffering as possible here so even by the time a villain is defeated, it all rings rather hollow. The other villains will continue destroying whatever and whoever they want. There are no heroes to stop them, nor will any ever show up based on what we’ve seen in the other titles. The whole Mad Max series would need a hard reboot to have any hope and even then I would not like its odds.

Overall 0/10

The War of the Worlds Review

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It’s time for the original War of the Worlds film. This one deals with the serious alien invasion that threatens to end all life on the planet. Unless the characters are able to lock in quickly, they will be destroyed. The older these films are, the easier it is to picture a complete alien takeover because there just aren’t enough weapons to fight them. This makes for a fun alien invasion film. Nothing fancy and no gimmicks, it’s just about the humans doing their best and eventually giving up hope.

The main character here is Clayton who happens to be fishing nearby when the first meteor lands. At first people figure it’s just an asteroid and they can make a lot of money off the tourists. Unfortunately it turns out that this is the incoming sign of an alien invasion and the creatures quickly appear all over the world. They are completely immune to conventional weaponry and have incredible numbers at their disposal. Can Clayton find a way to stop them or will he be crushed?

What makes this different from a lot of other alien invasion films is how there isn’t really a lot of hope for the humans. Usually we lose the first encounter but at least find a glimpse of a weakness and start to press the advantage. Instead in this one the humans are so far out of their depth that they are on the back foot the whole time. There is no weakness to be found and so eventually the only option is to give up. The governments may stay strong but the individual citizens quickly succumb to their base instincts of stealing and panicking.

The film is definitely not a good look for the pesky humans everywhere. We get a long scene of them basically attacking anyone in a car and destroying supplies. Even the briefest of hopes is removed once they knock Clayton out and take his devices. It showed a very big weakness that the humans have which is that their bonds are quickly destroyed at the first sign of distress. It almost makes you ready to root for the aliens because you’ve seen all that you’d like to of the ugliness in humanity.

Now there was a moment early on where you figure the weakness for the aliens could be light. They are quick to run from the flashlight in one scene and so that could have been interesting to pursue but the film doesn’t go in that direction. We do get a very sudden ending with their actual weakness. This always comes across as being very abrupt but otherwise the humans had been written into a corner.

Considering how old the film is, I’d say the effects are pretty good. Especially the special effects for when the humans are vaporized by the laser. It just looks a lot newer than I would have expected for this era in time. It’s clear that the film makers did a good job with this one. The general writing and script is also pretty solid. It’s perhaps a more jaded product than many others in its genre with humanity not deciding to band together this time but in a lot of ways it does feel like the more realistic approach. If aliens ever did appear in the real world, I have real doubts that people would stand together to fight them. Most likely there would just be a ton of in fighting the whole time.

Then Clayton is a decent main character but I won’t say that he’s great. Like the rest of humanity, he did completely give up on humanity. In the end he just wanted to find Sylvia so they could be together in their last moments. Romantic perhaps but this guy was one of the last hopes that the world had for victory. To see him just throw it all away was rough. I’m sure many would make the same decision though.

To his credit, Clayton had been trying a whole lot before that. They tried different approaches and possible weapons in order to end the alien threat. It just turned out that none of them were particularly effective here. The barriers that the aliens had were simply too powerful and not something that mere numbers could overcome. Early on the U.S. brings in a bunch of tanks to take on the first UFO and they are all vaporized within seconds.

As for Sylvia, she’s a solid main heroine. She does a good job of launching the exposition when she first showed up to talk about all of the scientists. Technically speaking I’d say the main cast is very small here though. You do have your share of supporting characters running around but there isn’t a lot of time for individual stories. It’s another good thing in the film’s corner which is that it decides to focus a lot on the invasion as a whole. I think that’s the right approach.

As always I will take the stance that trying to peacefully walk to an alien UFO is a bad idea though. We get this in two occasions. Once from a group of 3 guys who were hoping for global fame and then from a preacher who thought that the aliens could be reasoned with. In both cases I think this is just too naive. Even on the off chance that the aliens are peaceful, approaching them is not a bad idea because that will usually be seen as an aggressive move. The aliens have to make the first move and only if it’s a peaceful one can you move forward. Otherwise you just need to trust the government and let them start firing. It may sound callous but it’s the only real option.

Overall, The War of the Worlds is a pretty good film. In some ways I would say that it doesn’t necessarily stand out a ton from some of the other old alien invasion films but that’s because I tend to enjoy the genre a lot from all angles. I may not have this one in an elevated slot but it doesn’t really make any mistakes and does feel ahead of its time. You can really feel the dread throughout the movie even if the ending is on the happier side. I would recommend checking it out, I think you’ll be surprised at just how advanced the film feels.

Overall 7/10

Brother Bear Review

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Brother Bear is one of those films that mayyyybe you’ve heard of but there is also a good chance that you’re just thinking of something else. This one didn’t exactly go down as one of the all time animated greats. It’s not bad and in the end I will be making the cast that it is a “good” movie but certainly not very good or great. It’s a very safe film where you aren’t going to likely have any major issues with it but I would also say that to an extent the film feels a bit aimless. There isn’t a super large plot going on so half the time you’re just buying time with random gags.

The movie starts with Kenai getting really excited because he will now be able to finally become a man. There is a coming of age ceremony that his village does and you also get your own animal amulet. Unfortunately he is discouraged when his amulet is the bear which symbolizes love. Kenai doesn’t feel like this is very manly and his day gets even worse when a bear eats all the fish that the family had gathered up. This was directly his fault for not tying it up and when Kenai fights the bear, he loses and causes his eldest brother to die.

Kenai comes close to death as well although he manages to murder the bear. The spirits don’t like this and transform him into a bear. Kenai must now find a way to reverse the curse and in the meantime his elder brother will be hunting him across the jungle. After all, from Denahi’s perspective (The last surviving brother) the bear has now murdered both of his brothers. So he swears revenge in order to make things right.

This was definitely a really tough situation for Denahi in particular. He had a lot of reason to be upset as Kenai for constantly causing trouble. He also brings up a good point initially in not wanting to blame the bear for what happened. It was just an act of nature after all. Unfortunately were he goes too far is when he blames Kenai and when the lead seemingly dies, it adds a whole lot of guilt to Denahi. He absolutely has the saddest story among the various characters here because he is really having to deal with all of this on his own.

This guy was really resourceful too with how far he chases the bear. Denahi manages to make it over through the entire salmon run and also holds his own in the fights. Naturally Kenai is holding back since he doesn’t want to hurt his brother but it still takes a lot of stamina to have this much energy after being on the run for so long. It’s easy to root for Denahi as a character. Naturally you aren’t rooting for him to accomplish his goal since that would only end up harming him.

As for the main character, well naturally a large part of the story is about Kenai getting his character development. So he is meant to be annoying at first and you just have to see if he improves quickly enough. Personally it is hard to get past his opening scenes because these were really big mistakes that he made. It’s not like they were small ones by any means. His actions directly resulted in several deaths and that’s not something that you can take very lightly.

Then as a bear, he’s rather rude to the cub that journeys with him for a long time. Kenai goes out of his way to be a jerk like making fun of the stories and making it clear that they aren’t friends. The film doesn’t give us enough of a reason for why he had to be this openly antagonistic. So the only outcome you can really have here is that he’s a total jerk. Kenai tries to make it up to him by the end but it was too little too late.

Koda is the cub who travels with Kenai and I thought he was a lot better than the average kid character would be. Koda tries to keep their spirits up at all times and is a very reasonable character. He’s not overly oblivious nor is he getting them into a lot of trouble. You couldn’t ask for a much better companion and it’s why you wish Kenai would have been a whole lot nicer to him.

As for the animation, I thought it was pretty solid. There’s a lot of movement going on and some fun energy effects like with the spirit transformations. We do get some action scenes like with the bear battles so the animators get a little chance to show off. It’s nothing out of this world but it was pretty good. The soundtrack is more on the forgettable side. None of the songs would really be hitting the big time and the general ost doesn’t really pop out at you. This story will have to succeed more on the story.

The story itself isn’t bad. The animal stuff tends to be more basic but the human plot had some rather high stakes. I also give the film credit for not being too rough with the animal violence here. Even when a bear dies, there isn’t any real blood and due to the spirit influences, it doesn’t feel too final. It does feel at times like the writers weren’t too confident in the story itself though so you have a lot of random characters like moose and others who show up as comic relief. They get their scenes to buy time for the next main moment.

The humor could be hit or miss. I enjoyed some of the jokes at least but at times they could feel a bit forced. Like this is just here as a quick intermission as opposed to the joke needing to be there. I’d say it’s because the salmon run journey isn’t all that long. Maybe they should have had an obstacle or two pop up where Kenai and Koda have to help some village of animals. Then that helps Kenai start to become more mature. That could have worked over well.

Overall, Like I said this film is good but it’s not great. I think you’ve got a lot of interesting seeds here like Kenai being hunted by his brother and the debate on love and revenge. It did make sense not wanting to hunt the bear down after the first attack but I also understand why after two brothers are murdered you do feel like some human intervention is needed. Less screen time for the animals and more for the humans would have been a really good idea I’d say.

Overall 6/10