The Poseidon Adventure Review

Posted on April 6, 2015 by dreager1

It’s been a while since I checked out a disaster film so it’s time to see what happens when a ship comes face to face with a large tidal wave. It’s safe to say that this is a battle where only one side can win and it’s likely not going to be the boat! The film had a pretty good set up, but unfortunately relied a little too heavily on the tragedy elements, which ended up hurting it in the long run.

A lot of characters are enjoying themselves on the boat. As this film has a large cast, we get around 6 or more perspectives from the ship and none of them suspect that this will not be a simple voyage. The ship is ordered to go full speed ahead to meet a deadline and that’s when the Captain notices the large wave coming in. He orders everyone to hold on as the ship flips over entirely. Now that the boat is upside down, the heroes are going to need to head up to the bottom of the ship to escape. Can they really survive against the waves for long or will they all be picked off one by one? With a Detective and a Reverend leading the way, the gang may have the skills needed to survive!

For disaster films, I always like the intros a lot because we get to meet all of the characters. They typically have interesting plots going for themselves and that happens here as well. I don’t think I would say that the characters are likable during the intro, but interesting nonetheless. I was a little sad when the captain got hit by the wave during the beginning because he was certainly one of the more enjoyable characters. Ah well, you do have to expect a high body count here considering that the cast really thins out by the end.

It’s a bit of a double edged blade though because then the characters shouldn’t be made too likable before they end up going overboard. The film remembers this for one character as she insults the other members of the cast several times before the ending. That being said, a few good characters also don’t make it. One of them simply works too hard during the ending and it was a sad way to go. The character did a great job before she perished, but it was a low blow for the film. She didn’t drown, which is good, but a death is still a death.

The film really wanted to show how sad this was so it kept on focusing on the issue. We got to see the husband get torn up over this and are reminded that they were going to visit their grandchild. So, the tragedy elements were certainly there a whole lot. We are used to characters dying, even likable ones. However, the focus should be on the heroic deeds that they have just accomplished and not on how sad things will be as a result. Look at the deaths of Goku, Sonic, etc. The death is sudden and then brushed to the side after a few moments. That brisk way of moving forward would have done wonders for this film. It also would have helped if the film simply didn’t have any kids or seniors. It’s safe to say that it’s a lot easier to just watch teens and adults be defeated by nature than the former categories. It simply isn’t fun to put a senior or a kid in such a dangerous situation. Likewise with adding any animals of course. Now that would be a tragedy!
The main lead is Frank, a pastor who tries to debunk some Christian beliefs as he helps the heroes. He states that God does not care about people on an individual level as he is simply too busy. If you want to survive, then it’s on you to do so. He says to pray to the part of God that is in you as you strive for victory. God not caring about each individual is certainly false and hopefully he didn’t lead anyone down the wrong path. Frank was selling the people an odd package and hopefully they didn’t buy into it.

Apart from that, he still managed to be a fun lead. He is right that you should still try to get out of a problem instead of staying still and hoping for the best. This attitude gets him far and helps to motivate his team. His back and forth debates with Mike also give the film an extra boost. I was always on Frank’s side as Mike was a little unreasonable most of the time. Still, it is always good to have someone who will question your decisions.

Mike was apparently a good detective back in his day. As a result, he has a very individual personality that makes him reluctant to just take orders from Frank without a little back talk. When push comes to shove, Mike still does make the right decisions. He can just be rather annoying at times. He also blamed Frank for many of the deaths that occur in this film, which is a really low blow. Frank is the only reason that anyone survived this ordeal. If Mike had been in charge from the start, they’d be on the bottom of the ocean by now.

I do have to take away some props for the film with one of its subplots. One character was single when the film started and some of the other characters made it their business to try and help him find someone special. The guy even admits that he does want to be married. That’s pretty sad if you ask me. What happened to being proudly single? I get that Hollywood needs some romance in the world, but that character should have been left alone. The moral just makes the whole thing a little dicey if you ask me. It’s like the film is trying to say that you can’t stay single and we know that isn’t true. Am I reading into this too…deeply! (Ocean pun) Maybe, maybe not. Still, that plot didn’t add anything to the film. I could say the same for the detective’s wife. Why give her such an origin story if it will have nothing to do with the rest of the film? There is such a thing as unnecessary character development after all.
Overall, The Poseidon’s Adventure is a classic disaster film. It played up the tragedy angle a little too much for me to recommend this title, but you should like it if you really like the disaster formula. One by one, each character is picked off so it plays out like your average slasher or Resident Evil film, but instead of a monster attacking, it is simply nature. Disaster films sometimes do this aside from the normal ones so there should almost be a sub genre for it. Either way, you should not get attached to too many of the characters, but you can always have a competition with your fellow viewers to try and guess who dies first from the main characters. It’s the kind of game that I like to play within my head when I see one of these films. So, if this sounds like your cup of tea, then go for it. Otherwise, I recommend re watching the original Godzilla film.

Overall 4/10

Green Zone Review

Posted on March 31, 2015 by dreager1

Note that this review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be understood as belonging to this version of the film as a review of the uncut version would likely be more negative.

Green Zone is a war film and that makes it a pretty unique one for me at the moment because I have not seen many of those. I probably haven’t even seen 5 at present. That being said, it is not a genre that I would expect to enjoy typically because of the very concept. War isn’t fun and it typically translates to some pretty gruesome stories. On the whole, this film handled the situation as well as it could.

Things are heating up in Iraq and it seems like they are harboring weapons of mass destruction. Roy and his team are tasked with retrieving them, but every site that they arrive at is empty. Something clearly isn’t adding up and Roy begins to realize that a darker plot is happening in the background. One way or the other, he plans to get to the bottom of it.

One of the main things that I didn’t like was how America did not look good. There is usually a corrupt politician in the films, but the film makes us look bad on many fronts. Our army is quick to believe the intel that it acquires even though it is proven to be false again and again. Surely, we have people who prevent this from happening. More than one person should be required for this in case we have a turncoat in our midsts. It is rather sad to see the U.S so confused.

One of the soldiers doesn’t even care why they are fighting and he just wants to get out of the war alive. Certainly not a noble sentiment. Really, the picture that is painted shows that the US is simply too big and there is corruption everywhere. We are not fighting the good fight and are using our power to bully those who are weaker than us. That’s just not the US that I remember and I prefer to see us look very heroic and composed.

As a side note, America also looks like it is lacking in intelligence aside from the falling for fake intel part. Why would we publish everything that we are doing to the Wall Street Journal? Seriously, we shouldn’t be publishing anything like that. At the most, we should just be posting false data. Transparency is all well and good, but not if it costs us the war. Sometimes you just need to trust the government. As long as all of the senators and governors are in the loop, we should be okay. We can still know basic data, but certainly not any specifics.

As I mentioned earlier, the film did well in how it handled the violence. The only real violent scene was likely the interrogation one. That was certainly hard to watch as we never like to see an officer abuse his power. The man in charge seemed to realize that the officer was dangerous, but did nothing about it. You end up feeling bad for the man since he was caught between two factions of what he thought was the same army.

Roy is a good main character. Unfortunately, there is not a whole lot that one man can do in a corrupt organization, but he performs to the best of his abilities. He does a good job of getting the last laugh with the ending even if it is a little bitter sweet. He exposed a lot of the wrong doings, but if won’t bring the people back and now the world knows that the US is very disjointed. Still, it is safe to say that he made the right call. At least there will be consequences for the villain now.

Freddy was the main supporting character and he was definitely not very good. His ending is meant to be hardcore as he shows us that we are sticking our noses where they don’t belong, but he just looks s little delusional instead. His country is going to have even more violence now and he panics a whole lot. There was also a reporter to be found here, but she didn’t really add anything to the film. She helps us piece some parts of the puzzle together, but it’s hard to trust her since she will be quick to release any news and I still think that it is a tactical error on our part.

This is the edited version of course, which helps the film out in a big way when it comes to the language part. There were several words that were aired out, which hints at a bad script. It is not much of an issue, but something to be ready for depending on how you see the film.

As for action scenes, we get a few of those, but only one fight scene. Roy looks decent in his fight scene at first, but then he gets trounced. He likely threw the fight, but it still didn’t do him any favors. It reminded me of a fight in the Karate Kid as the main character was beaten up on the beach. Perhaps Roy could have won if he tried, but now we shall never know.

Green Zone’s locale isn’t very interesting as it is very bare and there are no real buildings to be found. Naturally, this is unavoidable based on the plot, but it can still make you wish for something more glamorous. The film is interesting though and you will want to see how it all plays out. That’s always a good sign. The film was certainly a little better than I had expected it to be, but it was still not enough to get in the clear.

Overall, Green Zone had some of the typical negatives that are usually present in the war genre, but it also avoided some. The violence wasn’t as bad as it could have been and the war themes didn’t get too radical. I didn’t like how America was portrayed though and there is certainly not a happy ending to be found. If you like war films, then this is a very good bet for you. If you don’t want any grim reminders of war, then I recommend checking out LBX, the show instead. You will still have high stakes battles, but they will typically end on an epic note.

Overall 4/10

Taken 2 Review

Posted on January 14, 2015 by dreager1

You have to admit that the poster is a bit much. It looks very good of course so I have no problems there, but it just looks a little too good if you know what I mean. Let’s just say that the main character doesn’t go around blowing up the city as he stops the crooks..he has someone else do that for him this time. It’s a decent sequel, but it’s definitely a little too dreary to get a solid rating. There is no replay value to be found here folks.

After Bryan saved his daughter from a fate worse than death in the first film, he has continued on with his job of keeping the peace and protecting people. He doesn’t want to let the events of the first film get him down so he invites his wife and daughter to go with him on a vacation. Naturally, they check into a pretty charming hotel like last time and leave the daughter along like last time as he heads out to have fun. A car appears to be chasing him and then he realizes that his daughter could be in trouble once again. The gangsters are mainly after Bryan since they want their revenge, but they’re going to take it out on anyone who is with him. It’s time for Bryan to take his gun back out since things just got serious!

Well, the film plays out as you may expect. There isn’t a lot of things happening here to be honest because the film is under 2 hours and we need the first 20 or so minutes for character development. See, the daughter wants to live a “normal” (AKA, a Hollywood) life so she decides to find some random guy and make the next step. That subplot is pretty bad and we’re lucky that it’s only here for a scene near the beginning and one at the end. That being said, it’s still a pretty terrible subplot and it’s a good way to start the film off on a low note.

It makes Kim a pretty unlikable character here from the start. Considering how hard Bryan worked to save her last time, you’d think that she would be a lot more grateful. Moving on is always a good thing to do, but you still need to be a little more rational about the whole ordeal. A vacation to a country that isn’t Sweden or France is definitely something that I wouldn’t go for. She gets to help out a lot in the climax and it’s good that she’s able to step up when she needs too, but that’s just not good enough for her to be a well rounded fighter.

Bryan looks pretty good as he continues to show why he is always prepared. He has a lot of weapons around him, but more importantly, he knows how to get out of a trap. His mini phone definitely came in handy quite a few times and he’s still a really good fighter. He doesn’t really have any flaws. You can actually say that he’s a bit like Kirito in the fact that you are meant to put yourself in his shoes. He’s basically the ultimate team guy. You like to think that this is how you would solve the problem if someone took your family hostage and he always delivers. In that sense you can argue that he is “too good” but I never really bought that argument. Whether he is meant to be the viewers or not, I’m glad that he is a pretty capable lead.

It’s hard to say whether Lenore looks good or bad since she is taken out of the picture pretty quickly. One of her flaws is definitely who she choose to be with instead of Bryan since we see that it was a bad choice. The game of romance is always risky and it’s why I never recommend participating in it. That being said, she seems like a reasonable person for the most part and she holds up pretty well when she’s captured. There’s nothing really negative about her so that’s a good thing.

There’s not much to say about the villains since they’re just meant to be unlikable. None of them really have any character to speak of. They want vengeance for the other ruthless gangsters who died so they just use that as an excuse to destroy more people. They’re all pretty sick individuals and you’re just waiting for them to get arrested as you watch the film. Unfortunately, the cops look pretty bad once again as they fail to take down even one gangster before they are mowed down. Not very flattering for them.

This film is definitely more violent than what you would see in your typical PG 13 film and mixed in with the dark tone, you have a film that you probably won’t want to watch again. The replay value just isn’t there and it’s not really a fun film to watch. The film is pretty realistic for the most part, but that just makes you want to avoid it even more since you know that these things are happening in real life, but without happy endings. It’s definitely not my kind of film or it’s just “taken” it a little too far. Regardless, one viewing is definitely all that you need.

There is one scene that definitely does stretch your disbelief a little bit as Bryan gives Kim a lot of tasks to do over the phone and she’s able to do them pretty easily. Drawing a circle with her equipment may not be that difficult, but it’s still not something that you can typically do without any experience. She was able to locate things on her map with ease and the whole thing was pretty unbelievable. Bryan was also a little too good there as he memorized exactly how many twists and turns the van did as they went on a pretty long journey. He was also counting the seconds of course so he knew just how far they had driven. I don’t care how much of a genius you are, that’s just not happening. Getting into the Embassy was also a little dicey since the heroes probably would have been shot as soon as they barreled past. The U.S. Embassy means business after all and they wouldn’t let a few trigger happy individuals in a speeding car get past them.

Naturally, the film decides to put some emphasis on the final murder for Bryan. He gives the villain a classic choice, walk away or he will destroy him. The villain makes a move and then Bryan does as well, but now we’re dealing with a defenseless villain vs Bryan, which makes the whole ordeal a little more dicey. Arresting him is always the just move, but Bryan is here to avenge his family so he doesn’t really care about all of that. The villain wasn’t smart there either since he should have expected the gun to be empty. I guess we’ll find out if his threat will come true or not about his other allies and their quest for vengeance.

Overall, Taken 2 is not a good action thriller. I recommend Mission Impossible as an alternative course of action and specifically the first one since it was pretty great. This film is just too dreary to really recommend watching. Seeing Bryan (AKA the viewer) beat up all of the bad guys in pretty intense ways as he saves the day can probably feel pretty rewarding for some, but it can also just make you think of how believable the whole thing is. There isn’t a lot of hope throughout the film and even the ending has some dark twists since we are led to believe that more villains will pop up. Since there is a Taken 3, it seems that this will probably happen. The film did a good job of avoiding language and unnecessary (fake) romance scenes, but it’s still just not a very good movie. I recommend it if you are looking for a fairly realistic story where you get to see the gangsters beaten up, but otherwise this is a film to skip.

Overall 4/10

The Maze Runner Review

Posted on January 2, 2015 by dreager1

The Maze Runner was hyped up as the next Hunger Games and that series hasn’t even finished in cinema world yet! Obviously the Maze Runner must have known something that I didn’t so I finally got around to checking it out on DVD. Great concept, but the execution left much to be desired. No worries, the Maze scenes are the best part so that did live up to the billing.

Well, the film takes place in the near future. A lot of kids have been trapped in a Maze and they don’t know how to get out. Every month, a box is sent to them from underground with one more teenager and food supplies. They’ve spent the last few years just trying to survive in their living space as they hope for the best. There are “Runners” who are teenagers that are selected to check out the maze. They have to be careful though since the Maze closes every night and staying inside will mean imminent destruction. So, they have clung to their lives for quite a while and that’s when good ole Thomas shows up. He doesn’t like this status quo…and he’s going to shake things up!

As you can expect, we’re all just waiting for Thomas to go into the Maze. It was in the trailer and we all would have expected it anyway. At first, I was pleasantly surprised with the film’s pacing since Thomas went inside it sooner than I had thought he would. I was practically cheering…until he left and we spent another long period of time outside the maze. (The living quarters are at the center of the maze so I say “out of the maze”) Don’t get the wrong idea….seeing teenagers discuss how they’re all doomed can be entertaining if handled right, but it just isn’t.

Most of the scenes at the living space are just boring or not fun to watch. We have the stereotypical bullies and the twist is that almost all of them are bullies. Everyone falls for peer pressure and the natural born leader wants the status quo to stay. The actual leader is a nice enough guy…or is he? I actually didn’t like him and his replacement was not much better. The whole thing just felt like a scam from Thomas’ point of view and nobody wanted to give him any intel. Just about everyone seemed to be mindless as they would just follow the order’s of the leader. It’s basically a dictatorship and this is certainly not the kind of place that you would want to hang out in.

The atmosphere of the film is very similar to Resident Evil during the climax. Once the maze is…no longer a factor, you expect zombies to start jumping out at you. It’s hard to describe of course, but the area is just very foggy and everything looks very hi tech. You quickly start to get your hopes up about aliens, zombies, or something else. Naturally, the film sends you crashing back down to reality with one of the worst plot twists that I have seen in a long time. The cliffhanger just makes you uninterested in what’s going to happen to the heroes or you at least lose most of your interest. There just doesn’t seem to be much of a point in their journey right now and they should have gone with the aliens/zombies idea. The atmospheric effect is pretty good and few films can actually pull it off, but you need something to happen to keep the atmosphere or it’s just going to fly away.

Thomas is a decent main character….I guess. He just strikes me as pretty annoying to be honest and he’s not very quick on the uptake. It doesn’t help that the other kids shun him of course, but he is always in the dark. He decision to help another one of the kids during a dicey time was pretty good of course and he managed to do well against one of the monsters, but that was mainly plot hax. He also could have put up a much better fight in the ~~getting beat up~~ wrestling game. I’ll never understand how someone can just stand there and watch himself get pushed around without much of an effort. Naturally, Thomas does land one hit so he quickly starts to gloat and then takes his eyes off his opponent. I can’t even…..

Teresa is the main heroine and she shows up as the final person to be sent to the ring. Naturally, she’s a girl so the other boys are mad/afraid that she’s here and she’s also shunned. She doesn’t help her case as she throws rocks at everyone, but I can’t blame her and I just hope that she can fight. Thing is…she feels like she is only here so that we can have a female character involved. Most films don’t pull a reverse harem situation like this in Hollywood so it’s pretty intriguing and I don’t mind so long as they don’t start to fall into the romance game. At most it is implied here and you can easily deny that. I have to give the Maze Runner props where it is due right?

As for the other characters, they’re all pretty unlikable and it’s hard to even talk about them. Newt is the second in command who gets very defensive at the drop of a hat and he just wants Thomas to stop asking questions. He’s the kind of guy who is immensely annoying to be around and he can’t completely stand up for himself even if he’s the leader. Alby actually seems like a nice kid at first, but we know that this can’t last and sure enough…he shows his dark side. He gives Thomas a very lightly veiled threat about what will happen to him if he breaks the rules and he did allow Thomas to be roughly handled when he first came out of the box. Sure, Thomas may have ran, but it was definitely uncalled for. Then, he cracks towards the end and while we’ll probably get a lot of sob stories and twists so make this seem reasonable, it’s still pretty sad.

We can’t forget about good ole Gali. He’s the main bully and he would rather thin the ranks of the heroes then go up against the maze. He’s always pretty unreasonable and he resents Thomas from the very start. You have to wonder how he got along with everyone else. He’s just your stereotypical bully and he pushes everyone around when he feels like it. There’s nothing likable about this guy and the film basically admits that he’s crazy by the end. We also have Chuck, who is the only guy who is really nice to Thomas and wants to be his friend. He also wants to see his parents someday…..Hollywood loves their drama so I’m sure you can imagine how this subplot ends. Minho is the main runner and he warms up to Thomas after the hero proves his worth, but I wouldn’t call him a very good character. He basically doesn’t mind Thomas because the main character is useful to him…that’s about it. Before that, he is pretty cold and he doesn’t mind leaving allies to get stomped on.

We can’t forget the monsters right? There is a pretty chilling moment where we think that there might not be any actual monsters here thanks to a twist, but that it luckily thrown out of the window right away. There are monsters here and they are ~~almost~~ tough. They are essentially mechanical scorpions that move like spiders and there are a lot of them. They’re definitely not very strong as you can destroy them with a simple, sharp stick, but they move quickly, which can make this difficult for the average kid. I’m always glad to have monsters here, but they are definitely not impressive power wise. Their design is decent though.

The actual violence isn’t as repulsive as the first Hunger Games, but it can get rather intense as we peer through one of the monster’s remains. The rest is pretty tame as we just hear/know things without seeing them. It uses the implied violence tactic that the Dark Knight used, which is actually pretty good if you need the violence angle. It’s a safe way to still get the message across. It naturally results in a rather dark tone like The Lord of The Flies and it continues on til the end, but it could be worse. The violence isn’t much of a negative here, but it’s still worth a mention that this definitely isn’t the kind of film that you want to show your kid.

There isn’t really a soundtrack although I’m sure that there are some generic/free domain themes in this film. That certainly doesn’t help the film. The main reason why I just didn’t like this film is because of the scenes at the home base. It’s hard to really describe why it’s so awful there and it may be a number of things. I’ve seen the “main character gets bullied” plot to death at this point and it is definitely not cool to see. Especially since the film is already devoid of any hope, we’d rather not see the main character get put in such a position. The actual setting is also very unimaginative and not very fun to look at the then the disappointing ending didn’t help matters. This is the kind of film that could be much better with adults as the main characters and better still if it had come out in the 80’s/60’s as a black and white film with a lot of debate. Sort of like 12 Angry Men. A reasonable discussion about whether they should leave the Maze or not as the whole film could have been much more interesting. The film just dropped the ball in all of these areas.

Overall, The Maze Runner is about as “good” as I expected. It does manage to crush the Hunger Games, but you are still left feeling empty. Is this the extent of our novel adaptions or are there other titles that we are missing? The Seeker and Alex Rider seemed like good bet back in the day, but they were cancelled and Harry Potter is already over. Ah well, maybe The Maze Runner gets even better with the sequel. The mystery is pretty engaging and I did like the concept. I could almost recommend it to you on that alone, but I could also just recommend the trailer instead. If you don’t mind monster violence and the classic bully scenarios going on for a very long time, then I recommend this film. If the thought of a rather depressing film where all of the main characters are teenagers who are pretty unlikable is too much to handle…you may want to run all the way back to the first Harry Potter film. It’s your choice!

Overall 4/10

The Hobbit The Battle of The Five Armies Review

Posted on December 23, 2014 by dreager1

The Hobbit trilogy ends with this title and it has certainly been a long road. The Lord of the Ring films have always been known as long journeys and the Hobbit films have kept up that tradition. However, they are already at their destination in this film so all that’s left is the war. This means that we get a whole lot of action and less travelling, which can be a good or bad thing. I can certainly say that I liked it more than the other two Hobbit films and most of the LOTR titles..maybe all of them. So, I’d consider that a success.

The plot continues where it left off in the last film. Smaug is attacking the village and the casualties are certainly high. They seem unable to stop this powerful dragon so it’s a pretty bleak beginning. Let’s just say that the situation is still resolved fairly early on in the film so that we can head back to the plot of Bilbo and Thorin. They have retaken the castle, but now Thorin is beginning to lose his mind. He wants a certain jewel at any cost and he’s willing to go to war for it. The Elves are glad to oblige while Sauron’s forces also decide to jump in on the fun. So, who are the 5 Armies? We have The Elves, The Orcs, The Dwarfs, Thorin’s group, and a second batch of Orcs. (The Townspeople as well) Will the heroes decide to team up or will they just join in the free for all? Looks like it’s time to find out!

As you can probably guess, I definitely did not like Thorin. He was a pretty disappointing character since he basically just made all of the same mistakes as Frodo and (future) Bilbo Baggins. He lets the gold control him completely and he can basically be thought of as a villain here. He threatens Bilbo and his allies while deciding that many casualties are acceptable as long as he is rich. He definitely has no regard for the lives of others, but the other Dwarves continue to follow him because they are very loyal. At least, that’s Bilbo’s rationale and it certainly doesn’t help the followers. They need to know when it’s time to just throw in the towel and call it a day. Deciding to betray Thorin to go help the others would have definitely been a good idea. Thorin does get some big moments at the end to try and make him likable again, but it just doesn’t work for me. He went way too far during the early scenes so he would need at least one extra film of being a great character to overturn that. It’s just too little and too late right now.

Bilbo is still not a great lead since he’s just not a charismatic character. He is trying to help Thorin get through these trying times, but he doesn’t do it in the same way that you would see a Tom Cruise or Matt Damon type of character achieve it. He is still not a fighter so there’s only so much that he can do, but I think he just could have been more likable. His only action scene involves him throwing rocks, which certainly wasn’t that impressive. He should have just put on the ring and attacked with a sword. That would have certainly worked out a little more for him.

The best fight scene in the film is easily the battle against the Wraith creatures. They were certainly awesome to fight against in the video games so it was cool to see them appear here as well. The scene in question may feel like it doesn’t have anything to do with the trilogy, but it helps to tie things in with the Lord of the Rings films. This battle was as close to a CBM fight as you can hope to get as the Wraiths showed off their super speed while the heroes blocked their blows. I think the Wraiths probably should have won that round, but at least a few of the characters got to show off their might here. This also leads to a pretty intense scene between one of the heroes with the big villain. The villain looked very intimidating there and the effects were glorious and while you can probably guess what will happen next, it doesn’t take away from the fact that this is an opponent to be feared. The hero’s voice got pretty strange and maybe a bit too warped to take seriously for me, but I guess it is meant to show you that this character is using all of her power now.

The soundtrack is decent, but it has a bad habit of popping up at inopportune times. The film loves to use the main hobbit theme whenever possible. So, it can pop up even during a danger scene or a sad scene where we shouldn’t have such happy music. There is a decently good score for Smaug’s battle though. I can’t say that I noticed music for most of the film, but what I did hear wasn’t bad. The director just needs to work on not using the theme so often.

The battle scenes are still not that great for the most part. Naturally, I did like the Wraith scene, but the battles against the average Orcs were not that great. I always wince when I see the heroes just go on their knees and stick out their spears as they wait for the enemies to come at them. What if the enemy just yanks your spear away or kicks you? There are so many enemies that you feel like they will just run over the heroes and leave them on their backs. As for the actual fights, we mainly just get to see the heroes annihilate the villains by the dozens and a stab attacks from both sides. I found the scenes potentially less violent than the other LOTR films, but there will always be a few stabs on either side that can be dicey. There is also some animal violence to be found here as horses and mythical creatures just can’t endure the arrow strikes. There’s a lot of action, but it’s not quite Captain America level in terms of how good the scenes are. The fact is…it will almost be impossible for this kind of fight scene to ever match up to something like Captain America since one on one styled fights are more interesting than war scenarios. Now, a 2 on 2 fight or a 4 on 1 team effort is another story altogether.

Gandalf looks pretty bad though and this will certainly give his naysayers a little more ammunition to fire at him. He spends a good portion of the film being locked up and then he quickly rides off to warn the heroes of an incoming threat. That’s good, but then he doesn’t even try to fight the villains when they arrive. He has his scary voice to intimidate those who hear him, but his spells really don’t seem to be that great. I expect more out of a wizard who has gotten the amount of hype that he has obtained throughout the years.

Smaug still looks as menacing as ever, but talk about a disappointing finish to a big character! I already knew what would happen to him through the rumors and the book being out, but it may be even worse than you would expect. Let’s just say that all he has to do is not fly at the sharp thing pointed at him. He has a few minutes of prep time since the heroes can’t move and are just pointing the object in a straight line. Smaug sees this, but evidently doesn’t care since his body is indestructible and all…..I guess he overrated himself. It was cool to see him lay waste to the town and his flame abilities are impressive, but he is certainly not a smart villain. He should have done far better considering the circumstances.

Legolas is probably still the best fighter on the hero side and he manages to get in his fights. You’ll probably be sad when he and Tauriel disappear for about an hour, but they quickly start to do their part once they arrive at the big battle. Legolas had a pretty good fight against one of the main villains and it’s hard to see any of the other heroes coming out victorious in that battle. Unfortunately, he does fall into the tricky embrace of romance, but he is forced out of it in the end. That will let him really focus on the battles at hand. On the bright side, the romance angle did help him make some good decisions like not abandoning the battle and deciding to help the heroes. I do have to question what the point of going to the villain lair was when they weren’t going to fight, but at least they almost arrived in time for their intel to have been put to use. He’s the best hero in the film to be sure.

Azog is one of the big bosses, but he was never a cool character. You may chuckle as he runs away from Thorin during the battle and tells his minions to distract the king. He’s not a bad fighter, but he knows when he’s outmatched. He’s essentially human level in speed while he has a little extra power. His body is pretty resilient since he survives a whole lot. I do think that the arm blade is a nice touch and he gives us a pretty good fight, but he’s certainly not an interesting villain.

Tauriel is one character who was pretty disappointing. She was portrayed as a great fighter alongside Legolas in the other Hobbit titles, but here she mainly plays the role of damsel in distress. She meets eyes with Kili, which distracts her from the fight so much that she forgets that she was even in a battle. That is definitely a rookie mistake and she just doesn’t bounce back from that. She is too emotional to go on in the climax and she spends most of the early part of the film telling the others to desert a kid who ran off to help save the land. She was just a very poor character by the end and I don’t think that she was handled well.

Bard is one of the main characters and he helped the townspeople regroup, which was good. He was certainly more likable than Thorin and I actually thought that he was a pretty decent character. He’s certainly not the strongest warrior out there, but he’s easy to root for and he could have been an interesting main character. Kili is another one of the fighters who gets a role and looks pretty similar to Bard and Thorin. All three of them are easy to mistake for the other, which is why I’m glad that Thorin was wearing a cape for most of the film. Kili is definitely not quite as interesting as the other warriors and he was one of the reasons why Tauriel wasn’t good in this film so that doesn’t help his case. His hero moment also backfires at one point in the film so things definitely do not go his way.

Elrond barely appears in the film, but he’s pretty cool. His battle against the Wraiths was pretty good in and of itself and was enough for him to be one of the best characters in the film. It’s too bad that he didn’t get more of a role since it would have been cool to have seen him fight some more. Saruman is also in the fight and he definitely looks good to the casual observer. If you haven’t seen the LOTR films, you would definitely like his role a lot. He is another skilled fighter whose magical abilities easily exceed Gandalf’s. At least…in this film. You know where his plot is going so that can be a little sad as he walks off, but otherwise he has a pretty good role.

Thranduil is the leader of the Elves and he’s another great fighter. It just goes to confirm my suspicions that the elves are the strongest hero race in the series. It seems like they produce all of the best fighters and they seem to be ready for battle. I have no doubt that they would have crushed the Dwarves in a battle. I’m glad that he just didn’t let Thorin keep the jewels and he was one of the better characters in the film. You get a Gilgamesh feel from him as he seems to consider himself above mere mortals. Elves are immortal I believe so he can certainly outlast one. He takes down a lot of Orcs in one scene, but unfortunately that is basically his only action scene. Maybe two if you count him verbally humiliating Gandalf.

Alfrid serves as the comic relief for the film and he definitely gives Bard a hard time. The film is so serious that you’re not sure if you should take his scenes seriously or not, but I’d definitely consider him as one of the villains. He almost drowned someone and threw someone overboard so you certainly can’t call him a hero. The only thing that you can give him credit for is his determination. He’ll do just about anything to get out of being in the battles. He has a lot of self confidence in this and he even talks back to the king. When someone gives him work to do, he casually gives it to someone else. His design also works perfectly for this. As far as comic relief characters go, he’s definitely better than many others, but he’s not going to be the next Hercule. It’s too bad that they didn’t arrest him here and even Bard seems to give up as he offers some parting advice.

One big pro that should be mentioned is that I didn’t get knocked out during the film! These films typically make me lose consciousness at least once, but I was up and ready for action the whole time. There is a chance that it was the theater effect since you typically won’t fall asleep there, but I think that the film was just more interesting this time. You actually cared about the subplots like Legolas and the village. The main plot also wasn’t that bad. I still didn’t care for many of the characters, but simply being interesting is always a great positive for any film. After all, you can’t enjoy a film if you are bored by it right?

How much plot hax is in this film? Well, there are extensive amounts of it I’m afraid, but that’s to be expected. Most films have some degree of plot hax and LOTR styled films typically have more than the average film since it involves mere mortals fighting beings beyond their comprehension. I’m actually okay with the supernatural elements here since Mages beating Demons is perfectly believable. What isn’t believable is the actual battle of the 5 armies. They show us a contrast at one point and the villains badly outnumber the heroes. They already had the edge before the final army group of villains arrived. The villains have Kaiju Worms and Giants to back up their Orcs while the heroes have nothing. You know that the heroes will ultimately win, but you don’t see how it is plausible as the fights are going on. Legolas, Tauriel, and Kili have to team up to take out one fighter and he nearly destroys them all. Now, this villain was far stronger than the average Orc, but there are still thousands of other Orcs and the other heroes aren’t quite as skilled. You won’t believe that the heroes can win for a second and the film is unable to change that. I think they should have just showed more foot soldiers on the heroes side and maybe a few wild cards like a heroic glacier beast or something. We had no super soldiers and Gandalf certainly wasn’t going to jump in!

It’s still not my kind of film, but Battle of the Kings did a better job than I could have expected. It doubled my expected rating of a two for this film and fixed many of the errors that I had with the others. One of the reasons why it can’t get much higher than this is still the kind of a film that it is. I’m not a big fan of war films and I also don’t like films that take place in the olden days or in a universe where it is always the olden days. I’ll take the present anytime and the future next. I just need a more civilized setting where characters don’t have to go barefoot through the wilderness. For that matter..I don’t like the wilderness. Just give me a few cities and I’m set. In the end, Bilbo ended up being a much better character than Frodo and I would say that the Hobbit trilogy is vastly superior to the LOTR films. This trilogy had a 4, a 3, and a 2. The LOTR trilogy had a 3, a 3, and a 2 I think. Or two 2’s and a three, I forget, but it’s not as close as the numbers would suggest.

Overall, Battle of the Five Kings is the most enjoyable film in the LOTR continuity to date. The fights still aren’t great, but they are certainly done in a better way than the other films. The fight with the Wraiths was particularly impressive and it would be great if all of the fights were like that one. If they were, I think it’s safe to say that I would have added an extra star. Alas, it still suffers from some of the typical errors like the war violence being a bit much and nearly all of the characters being unlikable. No eye shots this time, which is pretty great though and the film is an improvement over all of the other titles in just about every area. The ending may be happy for some or sad for others who know what is about to happen. Either way, it perfectly transitions into the first LOTR film so you can always check that one out next to continue the saga! I recommend this film more than most of the other big war films, but you could probably also check out another fantasy title like Final Fantasy for even better results.

Overall 4/10

Sorry, Wrong Number Review

Posted on October 27, 2014 by dreager1

Well, it’s time for another retro film. Believe it or not, this one also came out before the original Godzilla film. (Also? Check out some of my earlier reviews to see what I mean!) The title may quickly remind you of Family Game Night or the Sorry! board game. I’ll admit that the final line made me think of it as well, but this one is a little more suspenseful as there is crime afoot. It’s certainly not Hitchcock level, but the film had potential. It just needed to have less showing and more doing.

The plot revolves around a lady named Leona. She’s stuck in bed as she’s pretty ill. Her nurse is off for the day and all of the neighbors seem to be out in the town or away for a while. Her husband was supposed to come home that night, but he seems to have vanished as well. This all doesn’t bother her at first, but then she picks up the phone and overhears a plot to murder someone. She must try to alert the police or anyone for that matter. What if someone gets hurt?….what if she gets hurt!? It’s a race against time as it will all be over once the train crosses the station.

Upon first glance, this probably sounds like the Hitchcock film where the guy is stuck in a wheelchair and witnesses a murder right? It’s actually pretty similar in that respect since the main character can’t walk either, but that’s where the films start to deviate. This one wants to tell us a pretty complex plot through the use of flashbacks. I think I prefer to see the story in real time. I guess this way makes the mystery longer though. (It would be a bit of a short film not counting the flashbacks) We even get flashbacks inside of flashbacks as the film goes on and many startling revelations are brought upon us.

Leona is the main character, but she’s not a great lead. She may seem pretty innocent when the film starts, but we quickly learn that she’s more sinister than she looks. She stole the main character just to doom him and while her feelings may have changed over time, it wasn’t a genuine start. She’s also pretty unreasonable as she wants Henry to be indebted to her and to never really have a life of his own. He tries to find some work for himself and to move away, but she stops him each time. If he insists, then she’ll just have a heart attack, which will end the discussion. She’s pretty confident when she’s on the phone, but one could argue that she’s overconfident and she didn’t do a great job of explaining the situation on the phone. She was probably doomed without any evidence anyway, but she should have quickly gotten someone to come over.

Henry is the other main lead. He’s gone when the film starts, but we begin to learn a lot about his life through the flashbacks. He isn’t satisfied working for Leona’s father and he thinks his life is pretty dull. He’s on a pretty short leash so there’s not really much that he can do. Well, thanks to the nature of this mystery film, I can’t really say much more than that. I can say that while you’ll be sympathizing with him over Leona for a while, this eventually switches and you have to root against both of them. Henry has to make a few tough calls and unfortunately, they were the wrong ones. They put him on a path to destruction and it results in a dicey end for him. Then again, I should have suspected that something was up with him when he ditched the main heroine (The one who could have been the main heroine anyway) to go with the rich girl as he drove off. It was rather shady and not a very heroic thing to do either.

Waldo is pretty intense since he’s one of the most sinister characters at the start of the film. Once we learn about his history, he quickly loses his mystique. He was pretty likable at first, but he lacked the will to resist a tempting offer. He probably also accepted it because he feared for his safety if he refused, but it doesn’t change the fact that the money was one of the big incentives. If he had just stuck to doing his duties and not trying to fulfill his dream of having a big field with horses, things may have gone better for him.

Sally is a figure from Henry’s past who steps into the fray at one point and she was probably the second best character around. I was actually pretty worried that she was going to be an expendable figure at the beginning though since she doesn’t seem to be the type of character who will make it through this. Maybe she didn’t! Still, she gives Leona a lot of helpful advice during the film and while it may not have ultimately changed anything, it makes connecting the dots a lot easier for the viewer. Her husband is a bit of a red herring since he looks incredibly shady at first, but it all makes sense by the end. Her plot is also a nice change of pace since the kid isn’t annoying as you would expect one to be. He’s not too smart for his own good like in The Box and he’s not there to get in the way. He’s just a kid who is there to make us wonder what is going to happen next.

You could say that one of the film’s underlying messages is that everyone can be pretty corrupt at times. Leona’s father is forcing Henry to stay at his job, Leona is forcing Henry to give up his freedom, Henry is forcing Waldo to stray off his path, Waldo is forcing the company to lose money, etc. Most of the characters end up being corrupt or shady in some way or another and there are only a handful of characters that you could actually call good. The cops, Sally’s family, and some other characters down the line. It’s all rather sinister and it fits the film’s bleak tone. There doesn’t seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel and you’re not expecting a happy ending.

Needless to say, the ending is not very happy. I would compare it to another genre in terms of endings, but that would probably give it away. Let’s just say that you won’t be humming as you walk away from this title. “Sorry!” is one of the final words that is spoken and the voice will definitely bring back memories from the board game. The ending is definitely pretty memorable and you probably won’t be forgetting it after hearing those words.

While watching the film, I actually liked Leona’s father a lot. He started to show his true colors towards the end of the film, but he was still doing it all to help Leona. After she left, then he started partying, but she’s the one who created distance between them. It’s just too bad that he cracked so easily about the marriage. We actually find out one reason why he gave up so quickly, which helps, but he could have been a little tougher about it. There’s not really a soundtrack here so we can bypass that.

There is some romance, but ironically, Leona is the one who mostly helps to avoid that. There’s no animal violence, which is a plus as well. So, you can see that the film didn’t commit any big errors. That would have hurt the score even more. As it stands, I couldn’t justify giving it a positive rating even in light of this. It just wasn’t good enough to get any higher. A fight scene or two could have changed things and we almost got one with the gangsters, but it was averted.

Overall, Sorry, Wrong Number is a decent mystery film, but there isn’t a lot of meat within it. There is a ton of exposition and we slowly breach through the foggy mist that surrounds the plot, but knowing about it isn’t going to be enough to change anything. The plot is decently interesting as you are watching it, but the execution could have been better. I guess you may just feel that there wasn’t much of a point to the film. What was gained from it? There weren’t many noticeable weaknesses in the film, but it didn’t have many strengths either. I’d only recommend it if you really want to see an old mystery film, but even then there are better options available anyway so you may as well just see one of those. Check out The Big Sleep! (I know, I mention that one a lot, but it’s probably the best mystery film that I’ve seen aside from Sherlock Holmes…or maybe it is better. It’s a tough decision)

Overall 4/10

Deja Vu Review

Posted on September 29, 2014 by dreager1

I know that some like to spell “Deja” with a few symbols above the letters, but I prefer to just write it out like this. The title can already tell you that this is either the next Groundhog Day or it’s going to involve time. I can safely say that it’s the latter although it’s a bit of a trick question since Groundhog Day did involve time. It’s a decent film, but I am hesitant to say that it’s much more than that. The film doesn’t really end up leaving a big impact on you. You watch it…and it’s gone. (Like Battleship)

The plot involves special agent Doug as he tries to solve a case before it even begins. A terrorist attacks a ship and destroys over 500 people in the process. Nobody knows who did it or where the person went, which is where Doug comes in. Doug is the first person to confirm that it was a terrorist attack and he is then brought on to the elite squad. With the use of satellites, they can watch just about any spot on the planet as of 4 days ago. So, they can wait 4 days to see who did it, but it may be too late by then. Moreover, there is no rewinding available so they need to be able to identify the person right away. The plot thickens when Doug finds out that another person was murdered prior to the explosion and thrown into the ocean to make it appear as if the person was just another victim. Doug is now personally invested in this case and he’s ready to solve this case. Now, what if there is more to this satellite technology than meets the eye? What if Doug can stop the crime before it starts? That’s when the real film begins!

Well, the satellite thing is actually pretty scientific. I recall reading about it recently that at least 4 satellites are typically trained on the area. From there, it gets a little hazy since I don’t really think that the satellites would typically be able to look through buildings and get clear 1080P footage while you’re in a dark alley at night. It’s certainly possibly in theory though and it’s interesting to think about. If our government actually had perfected the tech to this extent though, the world would either be a really good place or our civil rights would be even more dismantled than they currently are. (America is still one of the best at protecting us though) Things get more than a little hazy once they start explaining about how you can actually look at the past with the satellites. That means that it’s fiction time!

I do give Doug credit for deciding to change the past while the others said that it wasn’t possible. If time travel was actually possible, then I definitely think it could be altered. The two events go hand in hand. If you can go back in time, then you can change it. If not, then time and the events within it are simply unchangeable. That’s always been my stance on the matter.

Doug is a decent lead. He definitely wants to solve the case and he’s ready to do whatever it takes to succeed without doing anything that’s really unheroic. This is the kind of character that you could call a little generic and get away with it. There’s nothing about him that really stands out and he’s only decent in a fight. His final stand off against the main villain was actually pretty bad since he was on the defensive the whole time. One could argue that his end is also a little tragic and not what you would expect while others can argue that it had to happen due to the plot. I dunno, I think he could have put in the extra effort and just moved to the Hotel California to avoid any missteps.

Claire is the main heroine and a lot of bad things happen to her in a very short amount of time. Unfortunately, she doesn’t have a whole lot of street smarts. She gives away her home address to a random guy over the phone that wanted to buy her car. If you’re going to sell a car to someone, at least arrange to meet in a busy section that has a McDonalds. (Or a sports bar, since the guys inside can definitely fight) Her second big mistake is to open the door when she hears a sound outside. First rule of living in any area is that you never open the door unless you know exactly who’s outside. (And you should recognize their tone to know if they’re being held at gunpoint. Although, there’s not much you can do at that point) So, that was a really rough start for her and that leads to the events that transpire afterwards. She’s a decent character overall, but negative things happen to her left and right. She can’t really find any peace at this rate. This also means that she doesn’t get a whole lot of time for character development and the romance is pretty non existent. (It’s pretty one sided until the end where it’s probably both ways, but still rushed)

Oerstadt is the terrorist in the film and he’s as crazy as you may have expected. I doubt I’ll ever like a terrorist character in a film and that’s a good thing. Films shouldn’t even try to make them sympathetic or likable since they’re just bad people when it all boils down to it. Oerstadt is certifiably insane as he wants to murder everyone to show the United States that they need more patriots. He wants them to wake up and start controlling the world since they have the power. Instead, Oerstadt is woken up to the fact that he didn’t think this through and that his only escape options are death and life imprisonment. Not the best set of options right?

One of the complaints that I would have with the supporting characters is that they can be slow on the uptake. Take Doug’s partner. He gets a message informing him that a terrorist is going to blow up the boat so he heads there to stop him. He sees the guy get into the van so he runs towards him. “Stop….Stop…hands in the air” is basically what the agent says. The guy just takes out his gun and shoots him…..eh? When you’re dealing with a terrorist, you quickly let everyone know and you don’t just walk up to the window. At the very least, shoot all of the wheels so that the guy can’t escape. Then, don’t go in front of the window so the shot will at least be a little more difficult. This guy was an agent so I’m sure that he’ll have enough connections to inform the NSA that something’s up.

The film is also pretty gritty. The main heroine’s plight is pretty serious and the partner’s demise is also pretty gruesome. The film shows the aftermath of the terrorist attack and it’s grim as you would expect. They don’t want to make light of such a situation, but these three scenes are still not really any fun. The heroine’s plight happens twice. The first one is off screen and then we see part of the second until the guy is interrupted. That was good at least, but it’s still a bit much since we know what would have happened.

Finally, this film actually has some fanservice, which is a definite no no. I wasn’t really expecting any since I’ve actually gotten lucky on that angle recently. Most of the films that I’ve seen have actually stayed away from that angle. Not here. Doug and his co-workers decide to spy on Claire through their super satellites to see what happens and they definitely take a while to turn the camera. They’re spying on her constantly and that is decidedly unheroic. It’s okay when she’s in proper attire, but they should otherwise change the view immediately. Not a good move “heroes!”

There’s not much of a soundtrack of course. Luckily, that was to be expected here. We had a bit of a red herring involving the main agent in charge since he acts incredibly suspicious the whole time, but his plot never amounts to anything. At least it gives the viewers something to think about. His role is very small and I still wonder if the writers just forgot about him.

Overall, Deja Vu is a pretty standard film. It does end up losing some extra points for the gruesome violence and the fanservice though so it ultimately becomes a little sub par. The main character wasn’t bad and I always like a good time travel story, but the film just wasn’t terribly exciting or interesting. You sort of want to find out what’s going to happen, but you’ll find yourself to be pretty detached from the current events. It’s hard to really get into what’s happening and you could say that it’s a bit of a negative. A film should really keep you on the edge of your seat. An example of this is the big car chase scene. It’s a fun concept, but it’s not as thrilling as you would expect. Maybe the cars just weren’t going fast enough or it’s because I already saw Need For Speed. Well, I wouldn’t really recommend this one and I think you’d be better off watching The One for parallel universe explanations.

Overall 4/10

Key Largo Review

Posted on September 29, 2014 by dreager1

Bogart and Bacall get to team up once again, but this is easily their weakest adventure. I had a feeling that something wasn’t right when I noticed that the name, Robinson, was between Bogart and Bacall. That’s not how it’s supposed to go right? This is definitely a classic 40s film and it’s still 6 years before the first Godzilla film, but something went dreadfully wrong. The film just moved away from some of the things that made the first few films so good.

Frank decides to pay his army friend’s father a visit as he travels down to the Key Largo section. The hotel is apparently closed, but the father seems happy to see him and Frank gets to meet his pal’s wife. They talk about the friend and what a good guy he was before he finally died in the war. There are a few shady characters in the hotel, but everything else seems to be all right. Some Indians are also around and they plan to turn themselves in for the good of everyone. They leave and prepare to do so later. That’s when the shady fellows decide to make their move and they take the hotel. Everyone has become their hostages now and they’ll all have to weather the hurricane together. There is a lot of tension in the air!

Well, this film definitely didn’t do it for me. For one thing, Bogart typically plays a hardcore lead who loves to mess with everyone. That’s not Frank in this one. Frank is still heroic and he’s a tough guy, but he doesn’t really talk back to the villains. He’s more of a subdued character who is tired of fighting and he’s ready to call it a day. He does make a lot of good moves like not falling for the empty gun trick, but he’s not as exciting as you might expect. Now, I’m not saying that Frank’s a bad character. He’s still a good lead and I agree with most of his moves. He doesn’t even get distracted by romance this time. He’s just not very exciting and he would make for a better supporting character if anything.

Nora is the main heroine and she’s the kind of character that a modern film could portray a little better. (Which is pretty rare) She tries to be tough when needed, but she just doesn’t look very good. She attacks the villain on two occasions, but she’s completely overpowered without doing any real damage. She’s a good character, but not one that is very enjoyable to see on screen since you know that she’ll just be defeated. I can’t say that this is Bacall’s best character to portray either. Nora just needed to get some sort of weapon to make things a little more interesting.

Johnny Rocco is the main villain and he’s about as unlikable as you would expect. He’s always chewing on a cigar or taking a bath. He’s not very bright and Frank makes fun of him from time to time. The only reason why he lasts so long is because he has a gun at the ready. There’s not much else to say about him. He’s just your average gangster who has a lot of minions who could technically beat him in a fight, but are afraid to do so. He’s easily the worst character in the film.

He’s got a handful of minions. One of them tends to laugh a lot while the other one likes to talk or grab a drink to ease the tension. A lady is along with the gang and she’s completely hooked on beer. She seems a little out of place with the group since she used to be a singer and everything, but she went down the wrong path. We’ve also got the Indians whose bond with the father is broken thanks to these circumstances. The cops don’t look too great as one of them is really slow on the uptake while the other one was quickly blindsided. The father of the dead friend really tries his best to keep on believing that the villains will be defeated, but he’s in a wheelchair so he’s not really in a position to fight. He does try though and it can be pretty sad to watch. It’s too bad for the guy since he had a pretty peaceful life up until that point.

One of the big things that hurt the film was that it’s just not very fun. We don’t get any of the witty banter that we have gotten used too in the other titles. Sure, Frank messes with the villain a little, but it can barely be called banter since it’s completely one sided. None of the characters are as charismatic as their older counterparts either. It’s a film where you are actually going to check your watch to see if it’s almost over.

The villains also get away with too much as you may have expected. The cops may be on the way, but it’s a little too late since one of the characters is already taken out and the hotel is basically ruined. Frank gets his big fight at the end and it’s good that he finally went on the offensive, but it definitely took a while. The main heroine’s attack that backfired is also another reason why the film was pretty doomed. It’s just another unnecessary scene to show off how “tough” the villain is. He’s pretty fat and he doesn’t work out so I don’t think he’ll be too strong. At the very least, it should be more of a fight. The Indians also get the short end of the stick here since their end isn’t very happy either.

There isn’t much of a soundtrack here. They squeeze in a song as per usual, but I can’t say that it was anything great. To be fair, I don’t think films really got good music until the 80s, although there are likely a few exceptions scattered about. There isn’t much scenery to look at either since most of the film takes place in the hotel. Not a lot of variety.

Overall, Key Largo lost the charm that the other team up films had. This one just isn’t fun to watch. We don’t have the epic banter and no fight scenes until the very end. The cast is also filled with mostly unlikable or bland characters. There’s no real romance this time, but the film was pretty sunk without it. If you’re looking for a classic (Pre Godzilla) film to watch, then I would recommend The Big Sleep instead. That one is a good example of how you should make a classic film. At least there wasn’t any animal violence here!

Overall 4/10

Van Helsing Review

Posted on August 5, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time for a vampire film review! After Twilight, I know that it can be a little hard to take vampire films seriously anymore. To my defense, I have always been against them. They just don’t make for very interesting characters. Luckily, we also get Dr. Hyde, Frankenstein’s Monster, and a vampire hunter. Adding in all of these fighters should help to make things better….I hope!

The plot revolves around the hunter known as Van Helsing. He’s notorious around many regions of the world and everyone has heard of him. He has quite the reputation after all. He finishes off a few monsters and his boss sends him to go meet Anna. He has to keep her alive to foil Dracula’s plans. Unfortunately, her brother has already been taken down so Dracula’s plan is almost complete. Will the heroes be able to put aside their differences and defeat him? It’s a longshot, but it may be possible!

Well, this is essentially how I pictured a film with Dracula as the main villain. I’m sure that Dracula may become a cool character someday, but I’m just not buying it. I really didn’t like him here and disliking the main villain can definitely hurt in the long run. Before we really discuss the film, let’s look at the cast involved.

Van Helsing is our lead and he’s basically the Jonah Hex of the group. He’s the confident professional who always gets his man and he doesn’t back down from a fight. That’s pretty noble is it not? Well, I’d argue that he’s all talk. His first fight scene against Mr. Hyde is supposed to show us just how hardcore he is. It only serves to prove the opposite as Van Helsing continues to brag despite being outmatched. He should have been destroyed several times during the fight and he only makes it out thanks to Hyde’s overconfidence.

After that, he gets beaten up on by Dracula’s two henchwomen before getting knocked around by Dracula himself. Van Helsing may not be human, but he may as well be for all the good that it does him. He’s just completely outmatched and that makes it tough for him to pose a threat to anyone. His personality is really generic in the end and there’s nothing to separate him from the other main leads of a hollywood film.

Anna is certainly not the next Black Widow. She takes pride in her overall ability, but it’s simply not enough in this film. Perhaps she could give the average human a run for their money, but she definitely wasn’t prepared for Dracula and his cronies. Due to her family history, you would expect her to have a little more experience. Unfortunately for for her, Anna gets thrown around for the entire film. Van Helsing even takes her out with his handy dandy sleeping gas. Anna continues to talk tough until the very end, but it’s very hard to take seriously.

How can anyone really take a fighter seriously when they talk tough and get defeated the next moment? I believe that it’s supposed to be inspirational to see the hero mocking the villains even while being kicked around, but I can’t say that it’s very good character development. Anna essentially serves as a parody to the tough female lead that we are used to seeing nowadays. She never really had an edge in any of her fights and it definitely wasn’t a fun showing for her. Perhaps things will turn around if this film got a sequel..too bad it won’t get one at this rate. At least she beats most of the other characters in the film…it just isn’t saying much.

Dracula is the big bad. He’s the head honcho and the ultimate evil in the film! His design is a little off putting since Dracula’s hairstyle is usually a little more subdued. Nontheless, it’s always good to have a powerful villain. Unfortunately, Dracula loves to squander his power as he holds it all back until it’s too late. He spends a lot of time talking to his minions and showing us why he’s such a terrible villain. It’s impossible to root for him while he’s so preoccupied in doing things that don’t really help his plan. His minions are constantly distracting him.

Dracula is also supposed to be immensely powerful, but we don’t really see a lot of this. His two guards seem to be a lot stronger than him. They could move at super speed! Dracula didn’t really show a lot of that, but he does have a good amount of regeneration at the ready. If it could have worked more towards the ending, things would have gotten pretty interesting. This is one of those times where power isn’t enough. Dracula is powerful, but he’s still not a great villain. He simply doesn’t have what it takes and that’s the way that I see it. Dracula’s brides were no better. They were mostly there to be really dramatic and help Dracula in his inevitable downfall. They didn’t have much of a role as characters.

Carl is Van Helsing’s assistant and he’s here to keep things light. It’s sad when characters are really just in a story for comic relief. Carl should at least try to be helpful and get some big moments. Technically, fans could argue that he had a crucial role at the end, but I can’t say that I buy it. They were really generic moments meant to make us like Carl a little more. No! Carl is the type of sidekick that I just can’t root for. Give him a few years to learn how to fight and improve his tech…then we’ll talk. As it stands, Carl was definitely expendable.

Frankenstein’s Monster disappears for most of the film, but he finally comes back towards the end. He’s played off pretty accurately from the book. He’s a misunderstood hero and everyone wants to destroy him as per usual. It’s definitely not fun to be a monster. His design was definitely hard to look at and while he could fight..he was pretty slow. Making him so traditional may not have been a great move. At least he helped to add to the monster count, but he was mostly unnecessary.

Igor is one of the more minor villains in the film. He defected to the side of the villains so that he could fulfill his evil ambitions….or not. I wish that it had been for such a deep reason. Regardless, Igor just isn’t a good villain. He’s very weak and he doesn’t stand a chance against any real character. He likes to hit people when they’re down, but he’s no match for a real opponent. Igor typically isn’t a likable character in the films and this one is no exception.

Velkan is a supporting character at best. He does get a decent number of scenes though and he may be stronger than we thought. There’s a plot twist that keeps him relevant for a while. Needless to say, he lacked strength of character and I can’t say that he was very impressive at the beginning of the film. Everyone looked bad though, but the overall plan was terrible. His reaction times weren’t great either and it’s a lose-lose situation. If only he had been stronger!

It should be noted that some scenes will stretch your limits for disbelief. The “plot hax” in this film isn’t concealed very well. Anna is thrown through a window and she bangs a lot of wood beams and the wall as she went crashing down. It was a pretty big blast that a human likely wouldn’t survive. Likewise, Dracula’s brides kept slapping her around while throwing Van Helsing into walls. Both of them should have been out of commission considering how powerful they were.

The biggest moment where you may have to facepalm is the final fight between Dracula and a powerful creature. By all accounts, Dracula should have crushed his opponent. The film didn’t show us anything to suggest otherwise so I don’t see why it was such a close fight. In fact, Dracula is on the defensive the entire time and he seems very worried. He should at least try to act tough on the outside since that’s what all of the heroes do anyway. This film just made the mistake of making the villains too powerful. When that happens, the heroes always have to win in really fake ways like what we saw here.

The fight scenes ranged from pretty good to decent. The final fight with Dracula is pretty fun to watch since it’s essentially a monster bout. It was also good to see Dracula’s brides take on the village. Their super speed feats were pretty impressive and they should have destroyed everyone without any real effort. The plot wouldn’t allow it, but that’s how powerful they were. Other battles were less interesting like Van Helsing versus Hyde. It was way too one sided and the fight was pretty boring.

The soundtrack was mostly absent from the film. Luckily, there is still a really good theme that plays during the ending and at one point near the beginning. It’s very operatic and that’s the kind of theme that can make a scene become a lot cooler. It would have been cool if it had played more, but it’s enough to grant the soundtrack a passing score.

Finally, the film did have some unnecessary romance. It’s squeezed in at the last second for the heroes so you can tell that they just wanted to throw it in. Dracula and his brides also have some wince worthy scenes that are pretty sad. Sure, it could be worse, but this certainly didn’t help the film win any points.

Overall, This film lived up to my hopes for a Dracula film. I’ll never like Vampires at this rate and there will likely only be a few exceptions by the end. (Strauss is epic) There was a moment where some animal violence concerned me, but the animal lived, which was great. Still sad to see it get hit, but at least it managed to tank the blast. The film mostly suffered from the fact that it dragged on for too long and it wasn’t terribly interesting. Cutting out Dracula and Frankenstein’s monster would have helped it a lot. Or, make Dracula a compelling character as he punches people out instead of biting them. That could have been a nice twist. This film felt like I Frankenstein, but the normalized version that can be more acceptable to the crowds. Unfortunately, the crowds didn’t include me this time. If you like Vampire movies, then you should like this one. Otherwise, I’d advise you to steer clear of it. Watch I Frankenstein if you want a film with lots of magical creatures going at it. Perhaps I was a little harsh on the film since it could have made more mistakes, but it definitely made enough of them. A cooler cast with better action scenes could have potentially bumped this up to a 6 if handled right. Maybe next time.

Overall 4/10

Battle for the Planet of the Apes Review

Posted on August 4, 2014 by dreager1

It’s the final installment in the Planet of the Apes series. It should really be City of the Apes instead of Planet, but that’s just how it goes. If you’ve seen my reviews for the other titles, then you’ll know that I’ve been less than pleased with the series so far. The first film was the only one that I gave a decent score. (Depending on your definition of decent) Luckily, the series ends on a relatively high note as this one definitely defeats the second, third, and fourth films. I dare say that it can even defeat the first film. Making it an uphill battle for future Ape films to defeat this one. Why was I so impressed with this film? (Compared to the others anyway) Well, this film may have been a little on the boring side for a while, but it also corrected most of the problems that I had with the series.

The plot begins in the far future. An ole Ape is telling his audience about an ape named Caesar and how he had a good adventure. We go back to the past and Caesar now rules over all. The humans had another one of their wars and everyone in sight died. The few humans who lived through it were brought to the Apes to work as slaves. Caesar likes how things have turned out and he even has a kid named Cornelius. Unfortunately, the gorillas are starting to rebel and their newfound leader is Aldo. He believes that humans should be destroyed instead of enslaved and he seems to be pretty dangerous. Caesar doesn’t really consider him to be a threat, which is either brave…or overconfident. It’s a little ambiguous. MacDonald advises Caesar to check out the recordings of his parents and they wander into an abandoned city. Turns out that some mutants (Humans who were affected by the radiation) live there and now it’s time for the war to begin anew. The mutants will launch a final counter offensive to destroy the apes once and for all. Which side will prevail!?

Caesar is back to being our lead in this film although he’s pretty distant at times. He’s technically the main character, but you almost wouldn’t know it from the way he acts. He’s grown old and some of the members are beginning to realize this. The humans essentially work as his slaves right now although he likes to think of it as a friendship in the making. Once the two sides understand each other…there will be harmony. It’s a pretty intriguing strategy, but it’s one that would likely never work. Caesar just isn’t likable by the end because he’s a little too oblivious to everything that’s happening. He never even suspects who attacked his kid and he’s pretty isolated in his little hut. He doesn’t even hear the loud sounds of war when the attack first begins and he refuses to go out because he’s with Cornelius. He’s definitely not the general that you would expect. He still does have a solid glare that he shares with the others once in a while, but it’s just not enough.

MacDonald is in this film, but it’s not the same MacDonald from the last film. This one is the latter’s brother, but he retains the same personality. He wants Caesar to give the humans more freedom, but he plays along with the system for the moment. He has big plans and they all come to the surface at the end. It’s a risky gamble and it only barely pays off. He was all right I suppose, but there’s not much to say about him. He was just there.

General Aldo is one of the main villains in this film. He wants all of the humans to be destroyed and he has several followers. Their goals are ambitious and not even Caesar can stop them. Aldo is openly rebellious and the others seem to fear him. His misplaced pride in his methods keeps him from being a likable character. Whether human or ape, both species have some bad apples. His fight against Caesar was very brief and it definitely didn’t make him look like a powerful warrior. I guess he was all talk after all.

Governor Kolp is The main villain of the film. He is the leader of the small pocket of human resistance and he definitely won’t allow the apes to keep their city. He wants his men to destroy everything so that the Apes can be their slaves once more. This guy is obviously not a sympathetic villain and he’s also pretty weak. He’s the type of guy who ends up going on a long monologue and panics at everything. He’s completely unreasonable and war is the only thing on his mind. Maybe he would be a little more bearable if he would actually fight….but he can’t. He’s a pretty forgettable villain in the grand scheme of things.

So, as I mentioned earlier, this film was a definite improvement over the last one. General Aldo and Governor Kolp are mean villains, but we don’t have to be reminded of this constantly through shocks and other such scenes as in the last film. These guys just come out swinging and they’re not all that subtle about it. The climatic fight between Caesar and Aldo is pretty serious business and while it’s short, it easily beats the last few climaxes. This was a fight that you could get behind and the stakes were real. It was very cheesy and unintentionally funny, which made it more enjoyable than the overly long revolt climax that we got last time.

Of course, that still couldn’t stop the film from being pretty boring. You never really care about what’s going to happen. After all, it’s a story about how awesome Caesar is so there are only so many ways that the film could go from there. Starting out the film as a story is never a good idea. Luckily, the film is decently short so it doesn’t have a whole lot of time to drag on. It goes through the motions and as the viewers, we just play along.

Another negative for the film would be the previously segment. It’s pretty long and utterly unnecessary. If you forgot the plot for one of the most basic franchises out there, then it’s time to go and order some Doritos loaded. We get to see most of the scenes that we’ve tried to hard to forget. From the apes leaving their suitcase where anyone could find it to the final fight scene of the last film. This flashback took up quite a few minutes and we just didn’t need it.

The setting for the film plays out like the Walking Dead. It’s a sandy area without any real kind of life. The civilization is pretty primitive and most of the inhabitants are still finding their place in the world. Enslaving the humans essentially restarted the cycle, which felt a little bit like backtracking as well.

Once again, I’ve also got to criticize the big plan of the Apes. Having everyone lie down in the middle of the road to wait for the enemies to come is a pretty terrible strategy. They could have been stepped on or shot. The odds of such a plan succeeding are pretty low. This doesn’t help to show how much smarter Apes are than humans either. They got off lucky that time, but what about the next time the humans strike? They better have their weapons ready.

Overall, This Apes film was more enjoyable than the others. It essentially did away with most of my complaints. It didn’t develop into a very solid film either, but being boring was really its only big problem. It’s like watching a LOTR film, but at least it only lasts for a little over an hour and a half. Nothing really gets accomplished in the film. The only big event in the film is the human’s attack upon them. The rest is just the Apes talking and everyone being upset about their current predicament. Yes, I definitely wouldn’t recommend this film and you’re better off watching some old Naruto re runs. There is a happy ending though so maybe the cycle can finally stop…maybe. We’ll see if the Burton remake or the latest remake will be able to get a more positive score. It’s hard to picture…but it could happen. After all, this film gave us a ray of hope.

Overall 4/10

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Category Archives: 4 Star Movies

The Poseidon Adventure Review

Green Zone Review

Taken 2 Review

The Maze Runner Review

The Hobbit The Battle of The Five Armies Review

Sorry, Wrong Number Review

Deja Vu Review

Key Largo Review

Van Helsing Review

Battle for the Planet of the Apes Review

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