The Maltese Falcon Review

Posted on January 17, 2015 by dreager1

The Maltese Falcon is a film that is even older than the original Godzilla. It’s definitely known as a classic at this point and with good reason. It’s a film that definitely holds up pretty well against the test of time. It’s nice and confusing without necessarily cheating the audience as it goes along. You have opportunities to try and piece together what is up amist all of the trickery that is afoot.

The main character is a guy named Sam Spade. He is a detective and one day a lady comes into his office asking him to tail someone. This guy may be dangerous so she wants them to proceed with caution. Sam has his partner tail the guy, but he ends up getting knocked off. This just got personal for Sam and he knows that the lady knows more. Other wrinkles quickly develop in the plot as an organization led by the Fat Man enters the picture along with a shady fellow representing another organization. What ties all of these individuals together is their desire to obtain the Maltese Falcon.

It’s definitely a pretty fun mystery as you watch Sam try to piece it all together. He definitely has no help since none of the characters want to be honest with him. He handles the whole thing pretty well for the most part although he does get knocked out once or twice. Sam is still human so I suppose he’s entitled to a few mistakes. One area where he didn’t look good was how he would let Brigid get to him even though he knew that she was pretty shady. By the end he makes the right call, but he should have kept the whole thing a little more business like anyway since he knew that it wouldn’t work out. As a detective, he’s definitely one of the best in the biz. He doesn’t back down from the cops or from gangsters. Sam just seems pretty fearless and we know that he isn’t, but his tough facade is a hard one to break down. He’s also a pretty talented fighter as he disarms several villains in the film.

Brigid is the main heroine and she constantly tells Sam lie after lie. It’s a good thing that he’s got a lot of experience at detecting those because she would have had him trapped otherwise. She got herself into this mess so it’s hard to feel sorry for her. She’s just as guilty as the other villains in pursuit of the Falcon so it’s hard to know which group to root for from the big 3. Regardless, she is typically on the defensive since she usually doesn’t carry a gun. She wasn’t my kind of villain.

Cairo is the kind of villain who acts really polite even when he is doing something sinister. He doesn’t look too impressive in his first fight with Sam, but he manages to do all right by the end. He is treated like a punching bag compared to the other villains though and you never get the feeling that his group will end up winning. He’s pretty brave and a quick thinker sometimes. Cairo’s a fun villain to watch, but one that you don’t expect to go very far.

Poor Wilmer is the main subordinate of the “Fat Man” and he always has a gun yet he is never really able to win. He’s constantly outmatched against Sam and the humiliations never stop for him. For a while you start to think that the “Fat Man” might just off him for being so inneffective as a hit man. Wilmer manages to escape that fate, but let’s just say that things aren’t all well and good for him by the time everything’s over. He does get more character than the “Fat Man” though. The boss talks tough, but he’s the kind of guy who really needs a bodyguard since he wouldn’t last very long on his own. He was a pretty fun villain and he also likes to act polite, but he enters the party pretty late. His final trick was a doozy though.

As with most of the old (Pre 60’s) films that I’ve seen, The Maltese Falcon has exceptional writing. If films still used the dialogue of the old days it would make for some pretty thrilling moments. There’s just something about the lines that makes all of the characters seem reasonably smart. It’s pretty neat and it’s probably one of the reasons why I like the feel of these films. The adventures are always very interesting and even if you manage to get lost in the shuffle of plot twists at some point, you’ll have had fun.

The ending was definitely a little unexpected, but in a good way. It was good to see a certain character get the last laugh after such a complicated endeavor. This character never actually gets to appear, but we begin to realize his brilliance once the final plot twist pops up. Trust me, it’s a doozy! It was a satisfying way to end the film and while we could in theory get a sequel, it can stand up on its own. The solid writing and good cast of characters definitely make the mystery entertaining. There is no soundtrack to be found here, but I suppose that I can overlook that this time…..I suppose.

Overall, The Maltese Falcon lives up to its reputation of being one of the best films of its time. It holds up well to the Hitchcock films or the other Bogart titles where he starred in a similar role. You may have some trouble keeping up with the names at first, but once you’ve go them down you’re all set to start deciphering the clues. Sam does let his feelings overwhelm him at times, but for at least 90% of the film, he’s the intense main character that we had been waiting for. I highly recommend checking this out if you like a good mystery.

Overall 7/10

Insidious Review

Posted on January 17, 2015 by dreager1

Time for another horror review. It’s been a while since I saw a film like this one, but you’ll definitely still be ready for what’s about to come. It was about as good as I expected, maybe a little better. That being said, there’s only so much that you can do with this kind of plot. It’s not my style, but if you’re looking for a nice horror film, this one beats the average flick in that genre.

A family moves into a house where their son falls off a ladder and enters a coma. A few months later, they start to see demons and they fear that the house is haunted. The main couple actually decides to move to another house, which is pretty impressive since that choice is rarely made. Unfortunately, it appears that the demons have followed them. Will they be able to fend them off and save their son? The poster gives us a not very subtle hint about what’s really going on.

Well, we get tons of jump scenes and a lot of fake outs as well to try and get that perfect balance that we’ve always wanted. The atmosphere is definitely creepy and the film does a good job of setting the tone early. It probably tried a little too hard to be scary at the beginning, but the director/writers know that you have to scare the audience early on or they’ll move on to the next film. The first half is pretty average and the main characters are powerless to stop these creatures, but that’s when a few new characters show up to help.

Bring in the Ghost Busters and an old lady who happens to be their leader. They deal with supernatural forces all the time and they know how to not only detect these guys, but they can see them as well. As you can expect, they aren’t actually good at fighting these guys. They merely detect them and try to reason with the demons. You may be underwhelmed during the mask scene as the old lady tries to convince the kid to come home, but then the demons take him away again. All she can do is watch so that’s not a great help to him.

That’s when the film’s biggest twist occurs, we’ve actually got enough budget in the film to visit the astral plane. It’s safe to say that this places the film on a higher level than most horror films. Many films would have been satisfied to have just let the kid make it back and we never actually see the astral plane. Not here! The main character wanders into the astral plane to find his son and he actually gets to duel with one of the demons. He does pretty well once he realizes that he’s stronger than the demon, but he doesn’t look too good against the main villain. The main villain isn’t strong enough to drag the kid away once he is running, but he’s still tough enough to throw around an adult for a while. It’s just how these things roll. In the astral world, will power is really what counts.

Josh is the main lead and he’s not a great main character. He stays at school pretty late to grade tests a lot of times when he should be home to help against the demons. Give all of the students As and Bs if you have too, but fighting demons is a lot more important. It’s good that he does ultimately journey to the Astral World to save Dalton, but then he decides to stay back so he could have a few words with one of the ghosts who’s been following him since he was a kid. Bad move Josh…bad move.

Renai is the other main character and she’s a decent heroine. She tries to get through this dangerous situation, but the demons are just too powerful so it is a losing battle. She tries to get help from many sources and she manages to last at the house while the demons are basically keeping her up all night with their random sounds. She definitely gives it her all, but knowing that it is all futile can be pretty sad.

The supporting characters are typically here to either look bad or add to the plot. We naturally have the pastor who comes to help, but is pretty ineffective and he leaves right away. Then we have the Ghost Busters who are treated as a joke until their leader appears. I really liked the Ghost Busters and a whole film about them fighting the demons would have been pretty good. Their leader is pretty knowledgable, but not quite as likable. She’s a little too old to be fighting demons and it seems like she hasn’t trained a successor. Once she is gone, humanity will be gone.

Again, I definitely give the film props for its special effects on the Astral Plane. It was pretty fun seeing Josh go in there and it’s a very trippy world. Things change in the blink of an eye and it would make for a pretty fun virtual ride in some amusement parks. I imagine that it would give many people heart attacks though so they would probably need to make the jump scenes a little less scary. There is a passing moment where we learn that one of the previous families was murdered by one of their own during this trippy moment and I wasn’t too surprised. Horror films love this twist so I guess they wanted to include it somehow.

So, where did the film go wrong? Well, one passing moment that was pretty wince worthy was when the demon decided to act demonic and stuck out his tongue. We know that the demons are evil, but let’s see that in a classy way and not in a cheap way. I’d rather that they just took out guns or something classic like that. The main reason why the film definitely gets a low score (Barring the fact that it is a horror film and watching the main characters get toyed around with for an hour and 40+ minutes is just not my cup of tea) is that the kid is basically defenseless against these guys, but he’s forced to stay in the astral world for months. They do mention that time flows differently over there, but that’s still a pretty sad fate for him. The demons seem to have attacked him off screen and we know what happens in the ending.

To an extent, I could extend that complaint to all of the main characters. I never like to see non combatants get injured by the villains because they didn’t sign up for this. It’s like watching a cop go up against an immensely powerful super villain. He’s a brave cop, but we don’t need to see him get beaten up for a while. That’s what it feels like when you see the humans trying to stand up to the demons. It’s more fun if one of the heroes can actually fight with supernatural powers or something like that. Then we’ve got a film. As it stands, this still takes down other films like Amityville and Haunted in Connecticut. Those make this one look like a masterpiece!

On the bright side, the villains actually have real designs and we get to see them pretty clearly on more than one occasion. No cop outs where they are just spirit forms or something like that. Now those are the kinds of plot twists that can be pretty annoying to see. They actually went to the trouble of getting some pretty scary costumes so the film went all out there. It makes up for the lack of a soundtrack I suppose since I wasn’t expecting any real music here anyway.

Now, this wouldn’t be a horror film without a twist ending right? There were really only two scenarios that I could think of as the ending drew near and let’s just say that the film probably made the right choice if we want the heroes to be doomed. It’s safe to say that these guys shouldn’t be in the sequel since there wouldn’t be a good reason for their survival. If you were expecting a happy ending then I will have to recommend taking another look at the genre for this film or maybe even the title. I appreciate the fact that the film keeps up with the horror standard of having a twist ending even if it does make the characters look bad and increases the body count. It’s expected, although I can’t say that it really helps the film. Who wants to see an old lady get attacked by one of the villains? Definitely not a fun scene.

Overall, Insidious is a horror film that tries to really scare the viewers. That is the job of such a film after all and it tries pretty hard. It probably has more jump scenes than almost any other horror film that I’ve seen. There’s probably almost one a minute during some parts of the film. There isn’t any animal violence and it’s classier than a lot of its counterparts, but it’s still not my kind of film. There’s no hope for the heroes and idea of the kid being stuck in the astral world for over 3 months is pretty terrible. If you are ready for your next horror film then this is probably the way to go, but if you really want a film that gets your heart racing, check out Yugioh 3D Bonds Beyond Time and get ready to duel!

Overall 3/10

Taken 2 Review

Posted on January 14, 2015 by dreager1

You have to admit that the poster is a bit much. It looks very good of course so I have no problems there, but it just looks a little too good if you know what I mean. Let’s just say that the main character doesn’t go around blowing up the city as he stops the crooks..he has someone else do that for him this time. It’s a decent sequel, but it’s definitely a little too dreary to get a solid rating. There is no replay value to be found here folks.

After Bryan saved his daughter from a fate worse than death in the first film, he has continued on with his job of keeping the peace and protecting people. He doesn’t want to let the events of the first film get him down so he invites his wife and daughter to go with him on a vacation. Naturally, they check into a pretty charming hotel like last time and leave the daughter along like last time as he heads out to have fun. A car appears to be chasing him and then he realizes that his daughter could be in trouble once again. The gangsters are mainly after Bryan since they want their revenge, but they’re going to take it out on anyone who is with him. It’s time for Bryan to take his gun back out since things just got serious!

Well, the film plays out as you may expect. There isn’t a lot of things happening here to be honest because the film is under 2 hours and we need the first 20 or so minutes for character development. See, the daughter wants to live a “normal” (AKA, a Hollywood) life so she decides to find some random guy and make the next step. That subplot is pretty bad and we’re lucky that it’s only here for a scene near the beginning and one at the end. That being said, it’s still a pretty terrible subplot and it’s a good way to start the film off on a low note.

It makes Kim a pretty unlikable character here from the start. Considering how hard Bryan worked to save her last time, you’d think that she would be a lot more grateful. Moving on is always a good thing to do, but you still need to be a little more rational about the whole ordeal. A vacation to a country that isn’t Sweden or France is definitely something that I wouldn’t go for. She gets to help out a lot in the climax and it’s good that she’s able to step up when she needs too, but that’s just not good enough for her to be a well rounded fighter.

Bryan looks pretty good as he continues to show why he is always prepared. He has a lot of weapons around him, but more importantly, he knows how to get out of a trap. His mini phone definitely came in handy quite a few times and he’s still a really good fighter. He doesn’t really have any flaws. You can actually say that he’s a bit like Kirito in the fact that you are meant to put yourself in his shoes. He’s basically the ultimate team guy. You like to think that this is how you would solve the problem if someone took your family hostage and he always delivers. In that sense you can argue that he is “too good” but I never really bought that argument. Whether he is meant to be the viewers or not, I’m glad that he is a pretty capable lead.

It’s hard to say whether Lenore looks good or bad since she is taken out of the picture pretty quickly. One of her flaws is definitely who she choose to be with instead of Bryan since we see that it was a bad choice. The game of romance is always risky and it’s why I never recommend participating in it. That being said, she seems like a reasonable person for the most part and she holds up pretty well when she’s captured. There’s nothing really negative about her so that’s a good thing.

There’s not much to say about the villains since they’re just meant to be unlikable. None of them really have any character to speak of. They want vengeance for the other ruthless gangsters who died so they just use that as an excuse to destroy more people. They’re all pretty sick individuals and you’re just waiting for them to get arrested as you watch the film. Unfortunately, the cops look pretty bad once again as they fail to take down even one gangster before they are mowed down. Not very flattering for them.

This film is definitely more violent than what you would see in your typical PG 13 film and mixed in with the dark tone, you have a film that you probably won’t want to watch again. The replay value just isn’t there and it’s not really a fun film to watch. The film is pretty realistic for the most part, but that just makes you want to avoid it even more since you know that these things are happening in real life, but without happy endings. It’s definitely not my kind of film or it’s just “taken” it a little too far. Regardless, one viewing is definitely all that you need.

There is one scene that definitely does stretch your disbelief a little bit as Bryan gives Kim a lot of tasks to do over the phone and she’s able to do them pretty easily. Drawing a circle with her equipment may not be that difficult, but it’s still not something that you can typically do without any experience. She was able to locate things on her map with ease and the whole thing was pretty unbelievable. Bryan was also a little too good there as he memorized exactly how many twists and turns the van did as they went on a pretty long journey. He was also counting the seconds of course so he knew just how far they had driven. I don’t care how much of a genius you are, that’s just not happening. Getting into the Embassy was also a little dicey since the heroes probably would have been shot as soon as they barreled past. The U.S. Embassy means business after all and they wouldn’t let a few trigger happy individuals in a speeding car get past them.

Naturally, the film decides to put some emphasis on the final murder for Bryan. He gives the villain a classic choice, walk away or he will destroy him. The villain makes a move and then Bryan does as well, but now we’re dealing with a defenseless villain vs Bryan, which makes the whole ordeal a little more dicey. Arresting him is always the just move, but Bryan is here to avenge his family so he doesn’t really care about all of that. The villain wasn’t smart there either since he should have expected the gun to be empty. I guess we’ll find out if his threat will come true or not about his other allies and their quest for vengeance.

Overall, Taken 2 is not a good action thriller. I recommend Mission Impossible as an alternative course of action and specifically the first one since it was pretty great. This film is just too dreary to really recommend watching. Seeing Bryan (AKA the viewer) beat up all of the bad guys in pretty intense ways as he saves the day can probably feel pretty rewarding for some, but it can also just make you think of how believable the whole thing is. There isn’t a lot of hope throughout the film and even the ending has some dark twists since we are led to believe that more villains will pop up. Since there is a Taken 3, it seems that this will probably happen. The film did a good job of avoiding language and unnecessary (fake) romance scenes, but it’s still just not a very good movie. I recommend it if you are looking for a fairly realistic story where you get to see the gangsters beaten up, but otherwise this is a film to skip.

Overall 4/10

The Maze Runner Review

Posted on January 2, 2015 by dreager1

The Maze Runner was hyped up as the next Hunger Games and that series hasn’t even finished in cinema world yet! Obviously the Maze Runner must have known something that I didn’t so I finally got around to checking it out on DVD. Great concept, but the execution left much to be desired. No worries, the Maze scenes are the best part so that did live up to the billing.

Well, the film takes place in the near future. A lot of kids have been trapped in a Maze and they don’t know how to get out. Every month, a box is sent to them from underground with one more teenager and food supplies. They’ve spent the last few years just trying to survive in their living space as they hope for the best. There are “Runners” who are teenagers that are selected to check out the maze. They have to be careful though since the Maze closes every night and staying inside will mean imminent destruction. So, they have clung to their lives for quite a while and that’s when good ole Thomas shows up. He doesn’t like this status quo…and he’s going to shake things up!

As you can expect, we’re all just waiting for Thomas to go into the Maze. It was in the trailer and we all would have expected it anyway. At first, I was pleasantly surprised with the film’s pacing since Thomas went inside it sooner than I had thought he would. I was practically cheering…until he left and we spent another long period of time outside the maze. (The living quarters are at the center of the maze so I say “out of the maze”) Don’t get the wrong idea….seeing teenagers discuss how they’re all doomed can be entertaining if handled right, but it just isn’t.

Most of the scenes at the living space are just boring or not fun to watch. We have the stereotypical bullies and the twist is that almost all of them are bullies. Everyone falls for peer pressure and the natural born leader wants the status quo to stay. The actual leader is a nice enough guy…or is he? I actually didn’t like him and his replacement was not much better. The whole thing just felt like a scam from Thomas’ point of view and nobody wanted to give him any intel. Just about everyone seemed to be mindless as they would just follow the order’s of the leader. It’s basically a dictatorship and this is certainly not the kind of place that you would want to hang out in.

The atmosphere of the film is very similar to Resident Evil during the climax. Once the maze is…no longer a factor, you expect zombies to start jumping out at you. It’s hard to describe of course, but the area is just very foggy and everything looks very hi tech. You quickly start to get your hopes up about aliens, zombies, or something else. Naturally, the film sends you crashing back down to reality with one of the worst plot twists that I have seen in a long time. The cliffhanger just makes you uninterested in what’s going to happen to the heroes or you at least lose most of your interest. There just doesn’t seem to be much of a point in their journey right now and they should have gone with the aliens/zombies idea. The atmospheric effect is pretty good and few films can actually pull it off, but you need something to happen to keep the atmosphere or it’s just going to fly away.

Thomas is a decent main character….I guess. He just strikes me as pretty annoying to be honest and he’s not very quick on the uptake. It doesn’t help that the other kids shun him of course, but he is always in the dark. He decision to help another one of the kids during a dicey time was pretty good of course and he managed to do well against one of the monsters, but that was mainly plot hax. He also could have put up a much better fight in the ~~getting beat up~~ wrestling game. I’ll never understand how someone can just stand there and watch himself get pushed around without much of an effort. Naturally, Thomas does land one hit so he quickly starts to gloat and then takes his eyes off his opponent. I can’t even…..

Teresa is the main heroine and she shows up as the final person to be sent to the ring. Naturally, she’s a girl so the other boys are mad/afraid that she’s here and she’s also shunned. She doesn’t help her case as she throws rocks at everyone, but I can’t blame her and I just hope that she can fight. Thing is…she feels like she is only here so that we can have a female character involved. Most films don’t pull a reverse harem situation like this in Hollywood so it’s pretty intriguing and I don’t mind so long as they don’t start to fall into the romance game. At most it is implied here and you can easily deny that. I have to give the Maze Runner props where it is due right?

As for the other characters, they’re all pretty unlikable and it’s hard to even talk about them. Newt is the second in command who gets very defensive at the drop of a hat and he just wants Thomas to stop asking questions. He’s the kind of guy who is immensely annoying to be around and he can’t completely stand up for himself even if he’s the leader. Alby actually seems like a nice kid at first, but we know that this can’t last and sure enough…he shows his dark side. He gives Thomas a very lightly veiled threat about what will happen to him if he breaks the rules and he did allow Thomas to be roughly handled when he first came out of the box. Sure, Thomas may have ran, but it was definitely uncalled for. Then, he cracks towards the end and while we’ll probably get a lot of sob stories and twists so make this seem reasonable, it’s still pretty sad.

We can’t forget about good ole Gali. He’s the main bully and he would rather thin the ranks of the heroes then go up against the maze. He’s always pretty unreasonable and he resents Thomas from the very start. You have to wonder how he got along with everyone else. He’s just your stereotypical bully and he pushes everyone around when he feels like it. There’s nothing likable about this guy and the film basically admits that he’s crazy by the end. We also have Chuck, who is the only guy who is really nice to Thomas and wants to be his friend. He also wants to see his parents someday…..Hollywood loves their drama so I’m sure you can imagine how this subplot ends. Minho is the main runner and he warms up to Thomas after the hero proves his worth, but I wouldn’t call him a very good character. He basically doesn’t mind Thomas because the main character is useful to him…that’s about it. Before that, he is pretty cold and he doesn’t mind leaving allies to get stomped on.

We can’t forget the monsters right? There is a pretty chilling moment where we think that there might not be any actual monsters here thanks to a twist, but that it luckily thrown out of the window right away. There are monsters here and they are ~~almost~~ tough. They are essentially mechanical scorpions that move like spiders and there are a lot of them. They’re definitely not very strong as you can destroy them with a simple, sharp stick, but they move quickly, which can make this difficult for the average kid. I’m always glad to have monsters here, but they are definitely not impressive power wise. Their design is decent though.

The actual violence isn’t as repulsive as the first Hunger Games, but it can get rather intense as we peer through one of the monster’s remains. The rest is pretty tame as we just hear/know things without seeing them. It uses the implied violence tactic that the Dark Knight used, which is actually pretty good if you need the violence angle. It’s a safe way to still get the message across. It naturally results in a rather dark tone like The Lord of The Flies and it continues on til the end, but it could be worse. The violence isn’t much of a negative here, but it’s still worth a mention that this definitely isn’t the kind of film that you want to show your kid.

There isn’t really a soundtrack although I’m sure that there are some generic/free domain themes in this film. That certainly doesn’t help the film. The main reason why I just didn’t like this film is because of the scenes at the home base. It’s hard to really describe why it’s so awful there and it may be a number of things. I’ve seen the “main character gets bullied” plot to death at this point and it is definitely not cool to see. Especially since the film is already devoid of any hope, we’d rather not see the main character get put in such a position. The actual setting is also very unimaginative and not very fun to look at the then the disappointing ending didn’t help matters. This is the kind of film that could be much better with adults as the main characters and better still if it had come out in the 80’s/60’s as a black and white film with a lot of debate. Sort of like 12 Angry Men. A reasonable discussion about whether they should leave the Maze or not as the whole film could have been much more interesting. The film just dropped the ball in all of these areas.

Overall, The Maze Runner is about as “good” as I expected. It does manage to crush the Hunger Games, but you are still left feeling empty. Is this the extent of our novel adaptions or are there other titles that we are missing? The Seeker and Alex Rider seemed like good bet back in the day, but they were cancelled and Harry Potter is already over. Ah well, maybe The Maze Runner gets even better with the sequel. The mystery is pretty engaging and I did like the concept. I could almost recommend it to you on that alone, but I could also just recommend the trailer instead. If you don’t mind monster violence and the classic bully scenarios going on for a very long time, then I recommend this film. If the thought of a rather depressing film where all of the main characters are teenagers who are pretty unlikable is too much to handle…you may want to run all the way back to the first Harry Potter film. It’s your choice!

Overall 4/10

The Hobbit The Battle of The Five Armies Review

Posted on December 23, 2014 by dreager1

The Hobbit trilogy ends with this title and it has certainly been a long road. The Lord of the Ring films have always been known as long journeys and the Hobbit films have kept up that tradition. However, they are already at their destination in this film so all that’s left is the war. This means that we get a whole lot of action and less travelling, which can be a good or bad thing. I can certainly say that I liked it more than the other two Hobbit films and most of the LOTR titles..maybe all of them. So, I’d consider that a success.

The plot continues where it left off in the last film. Smaug is attacking the village and the casualties are certainly high. They seem unable to stop this powerful dragon so it’s a pretty bleak beginning. Let’s just say that the situation is still resolved fairly early on in the film so that we can head back to the plot of Bilbo and Thorin. They have retaken the castle, but now Thorin is beginning to lose his mind. He wants a certain jewel at any cost and he’s willing to go to war for it. The Elves are glad to oblige while Sauron’s forces also decide to jump in on the fun. So, who are the 5 Armies? We have The Elves, The Orcs, The Dwarfs, Thorin’s group, and a second batch of Orcs. (The Townspeople as well) Will the heroes decide to team up or will they just join in the free for all? Looks like it’s time to find out!

As you can probably guess, I definitely did not like Thorin. He was a pretty disappointing character since he basically just made all of the same mistakes as Frodo and (future) Bilbo Baggins. He lets the gold control him completely and he can basically be thought of as a villain here. He threatens Bilbo and his allies while deciding that many casualties are acceptable as long as he is rich. He definitely has no regard for the lives of others, but the other Dwarves continue to follow him because they are very loyal. At least, that’s Bilbo’s rationale and it certainly doesn’t help the followers. They need to know when it’s time to just throw in the towel and call it a day. Deciding to betray Thorin to go help the others would have definitely been a good idea. Thorin does get some big moments at the end to try and make him likable again, but it just doesn’t work for me. He went way too far during the early scenes so he would need at least one extra film of being a great character to overturn that. It’s just too little and too late right now.

Bilbo is still not a great lead since he’s just not a charismatic character. He is trying to help Thorin get through these trying times, but he doesn’t do it in the same way that you would see a Tom Cruise or Matt Damon type of character achieve it. He is still not a fighter so there’s only so much that he can do, but I think he just could have been more likable. His only action scene involves him throwing rocks, which certainly wasn’t that impressive. He should have just put on the ring and attacked with a sword. That would have certainly worked out a little more for him.

The best fight scene in the film is easily the battle against the Wraith creatures. They were certainly awesome to fight against in the video games so it was cool to see them appear here as well. The scene in question may feel like it doesn’t have anything to do with the trilogy, but it helps to tie things in with the Lord of the Rings films. This battle was as close to a CBM fight as you can hope to get as the Wraiths showed off their super speed while the heroes blocked their blows. I think the Wraiths probably should have won that round, but at least a few of the characters got to show off their might here. This also leads to a pretty intense scene between one of the heroes with the big villain. The villain looked very intimidating there and the effects were glorious and while you can probably guess what will happen next, it doesn’t take away from the fact that this is an opponent to be feared. The hero’s voice got pretty strange and maybe a bit too warped to take seriously for me, but I guess it is meant to show you that this character is using all of her power now.

The soundtrack is decent, but it has a bad habit of popping up at inopportune times. The film loves to use the main hobbit theme whenever possible. So, it can pop up even during a danger scene or a sad scene where we shouldn’t have such happy music. There is a decently good score for Smaug’s battle though. I can’t say that I noticed music for most of the film, but what I did hear wasn’t bad. The director just needs to work on not using the theme so often.

The battle scenes are still not that great for the most part. Naturally, I did like the Wraith scene, but the battles against the average Orcs were not that great. I always wince when I see the heroes just go on their knees and stick out their spears as they wait for the enemies to come at them. What if the enemy just yanks your spear away or kicks you? There are so many enemies that you feel like they will just run over the heroes and leave them on their backs. As for the actual fights, we mainly just get to see the heroes annihilate the villains by the dozens and a stab attacks from both sides. I found the scenes potentially less violent than the other LOTR films, but there will always be a few stabs on either side that can be dicey. There is also some animal violence to be found here as horses and mythical creatures just can’t endure the arrow strikes. There’s a lot of action, but it’s not quite Captain America level in terms of how good the scenes are. The fact is…it will almost be impossible for this kind of fight scene to ever match up to something like Captain America since one on one styled fights are more interesting than war scenarios. Now, a 2 on 2 fight or a 4 on 1 team effort is another story altogether.

Gandalf looks pretty bad though and this will certainly give his naysayers a little more ammunition to fire at him. He spends a good portion of the film being locked up and then he quickly rides off to warn the heroes of an incoming threat. That’s good, but then he doesn’t even try to fight the villains when they arrive. He has his scary voice to intimidate those who hear him, but his spells really don’t seem to be that great. I expect more out of a wizard who has gotten the amount of hype that he has obtained throughout the years.

Smaug still looks as menacing as ever, but talk about a disappointing finish to a big character! I already knew what would happen to him through the rumors and the book being out, but it may be even worse than you would expect. Let’s just say that all he has to do is not fly at the sharp thing pointed at him. He has a few minutes of prep time since the heroes can’t move and are just pointing the object in a straight line. Smaug sees this, but evidently doesn’t care since his body is indestructible and all…..I guess he overrated himself. It was cool to see him lay waste to the town and his flame abilities are impressive, but he is certainly not a smart villain. He should have done far better considering the circumstances.

Legolas is probably still the best fighter on the hero side and he manages to get in his fights. You’ll probably be sad when he and Tauriel disappear for about an hour, but they quickly start to do their part once they arrive at the big battle. Legolas had a pretty good fight against one of the main villains and it’s hard to see any of the other heroes coming out victorious in that battle. Unfortunately, he does fall into the tricky embrace of romance, but he is forced out of it in the end. That will let him really focus on the battles at hand. On the bright side, the romance angle did help him make some good decisions like not abandoning the battle and deciding to help the heroes. I do have to question what the point of going to the villain lair was when they weren’t going to fight, but at least they almost arrived in time for their intel to have been put to use. He’s the best hero in the film to be sure.

Azog is one of the big bosses, but he was never a cool character. You may chuckle as he runs away from Thorin during the battle and tells his minions to distract the king. He’s not a bad fighter, but he knows when he’s outmatched. He’s essentially human level in speed while he has a little extra power. His body is pretty resilient since he survives a whole lot. I do think that the arm blade is a nice touch and he gives us a pretty good fight, but he’s certainly not an interesting villain.

Tauriel is one character who was pretty disappointing. She was portrayed as a great fighter alongside Legolas in the other Hobbit titles, but here she mainly plays the role of damsel in distress. She meets eyes with Kili, which distracts her from the fight so much that she forgets that she was even in a battle. That is definitely a rookie mistake and she just doesn’t bounce back from that. She is too emotional to go on in the climax and she spends most of the early part of the film telling the others to desert a kid who ran off to help save the land. She was just a very poor character by the end and I don’t think that she was handled well.

Bard is one of the main characters and he helped the townspeople regroup, which was good. He was certainly more likable than Thorin and I actually thought that he was a pretty decent character. He’s certainly not the strongest warrior out there, but he’s easy to root for and he could have been an interesting main character. Kili is another one of the fighters who gets a role and looks pretty similar to Bard and Thorin. All three of them are easy to mistake for the other, which is why I’m glad that Thorin was wearing a cape for most of the film. Kili is definitely not quite as interesting as the other warriors and he was one of the reasons why Tauriel wasn’t good in this film so that doesn’t help his case. His hero moment also backfires at one point in the film so things definitely do not go his way.

Elrond barely appears in the film, but he’s pretty cool. His battle against the Wraiths was pretty good in and of itself and was enough for him to be one of the best characters in the film. It’s too bad that he didn’t get more of a role since it would have been cool to have seen him fight some more. Saruman is also in the fight and he definitely looks good to the casual observer. If you haven’t seen the LOTR films, you would definitely like his role a lot. He is another skilled fighter whose magical abilities easily exceed Gandalf’s. At least…in this film. You know where his plot is going so that can be a little sad as he walks off, but otherwise he has a pretty good role.

Thranduil is the leader of the Elves and he’s another great fighter. It just goes to confirm my suspicions that the elves are the strongest hero race in the series. It seems like they produce all of the best fighters and they seem to be ready for battle. I have no doubt that they would have crushed the Dwarves in a battle. I’m glad that he just didn’t let Thorin keep the jewels and he was one of the better characters in the film. You get a Gilgamesh feel from him as he seems to consider himself above mere mortals. Elves are immortal I believe so he can certainly outlast one. He takes down a lot of Orcs in one scene, but unfortunately that is basically his only action scene. Maybe two if you count him verbally humiliating Gandalf.

Alfrid serves as the comic relief for the film and he definitely gives Bard a hard time. The film is so serious that you’re not sure if you should take his scenes seriously or not, but I’d definitely consider him as one of the villains. He almost drowned someone and threw someone overboard so you certainly can’t call him a hero. The only thing that you can give him credit for is his determination. He’ll do just about anything to get out of being in the battles. He has a lot of self confidence in this and he even talks back to the king. When someone gives him work to do, he casually gives it to someone else. His design also works perfectly for this. As far as comic relief characters go, he’s definitely better than many others, but he’s not going to be the next Hercule. It’s too bad that they didn’t arrest him here and even Bard seems to give up as he offers some parting advice.

One big pro that should be mentioned is that I didn’t get knocked out during the film! These films typically make me lose consciousness at least once, but I was up and ready for action the whole time. There is a chance that it was the theater effect since you typically won’t fall asleep there, but I think that the film was just more interesting this time. You actually cared about the subplots like Legolas and the village. The main plot also wasn’t that bad. I still didn’t care for many of the characters, but simply being interesting is always a great positive for any film. After all, you can’t enjoy a film if you are bored by it right?

How much plot hax is in this film? Well, there are extensive amounts of it I’m afraid, but that’s to be expected. Most films have some degree of plot hax and LOTR styled films typically have more than the average film since it involves mere mortals fighting beings beyond their comprehension. I’m actually okay with the supernatural elements here since Mages beating Demons is perfectly believable. What isn’t believable is the actual battle of the 5 armies. They show us a contrast at one point and the villains badly outnumber the heroes. They already had the edge before the final army group of villains arrived. The villains have Kaiju Worms and Giants to back up their Orcs while the heroes have nothing. You know that the heroes will ultimately win, but you don’t see how it is plausible as the fights are going on. Legolas, Tauriel, and Kili have to team up to take out one fighter and he nearly destroys them all. Now, this villain was far stronger than the average Orc, but there are still thousands of other Orcs and the other heroes aren’t quite as skilled. You won’t believe that the heroes can win for a second and the film is unable to change that. I think they should have just showed more foot soldiers on the heroes side and maybe a few wild cards like a heroic glacier beast or something. We had no super soldiers and Gandalf certainly wasn’t going to jump in!

It’s still not my kind of film, but Battle of the Kings did a better job than I could have expected. It doubled my expected rating of a two for this film and fixed many of the errors that I had with the others. One of the reasons why it can’t get much higher than this is still the kind of a film that it is. I’m not a big fan of war films and I also don’t like films that take place in the olden days or in a universe where it is always the olden days. I’ll take the present anytime and the future next. I just need a more civilized setting where characters don’t have to go barefoot through the wilderness. For that matter..I don’t like the wilderness. Just give me a few cities and I’m set. In the end, Bilbo ended up being a much better character than Frodo and I would say that the Hobbit trilogy is vastly superior to the LOTR films. This trilogy had a 4, a 3, and a 2. The LOTR trilogy had a 3, a 3, and a 2 I think. Or two 2’s and a three, I forget, but it’s not as close as the numbers would suggest.

Overall, Battle of the Five Kings is the most enjoyable film in the LOTR continuity to date. The fights still aren’t great, but they are certainly done in a better way than the other films. The fight with the Wraiths was particularly impressive and it would be great if all of the fights were like that one. If they were, I think it’s safe to say that I would have added an extra star. Alas, it still suffers from some of the typical errors like the war violence being a bit much and nearly all of the characters being unlikable. No eye shots this time, which is pretty great though and the film is an improvement over all of the other titles in just about every area. The ending may be happy for some or sad for others who know what is about to happen. Either way, it perfectly transitions into the first LOTR film so you can always check that one out next to continue the saga! I recommend this film more than most of the other big war films, but you could probably also check out another fantasy title like Final Fantasy for even better results.

Overall 4/10

The Giver Review

Posted on December 20, 2014 by dreager1

The Giver is a film that I definitely heard a lot as I frequented the world. The poster was just about everywhere, but it was not very informative so I never had any idea on what the plot was. Eventually, I finally saw the film and it’s certainly a pretty good one. I think that the plot works better as a TV show or a movie series, but if it had been the former I may not have seen it anyway…so it’s a mixed bag. Nonetheless, it’s good to see a film with an original plot like this one since that’s pretty rare nowadays.

It is the year 20XX and….well, I guess you can just pick a year. Humanity has erected a…would this count as a spoiler? Hmmmm……all right folks, watch out for spoilers! This probably counts, but it needs to be mentioned…anyway, back to where I started. Humanity has erected a large barricade that stands at the edge of their territory and nobody is allowed to go anywhere near it. It is what keeps them safe by eliminating all emotions and creative thinking. Humanity lives with their assigned roles right now and they don’t know what happiness and sadness are. It’s a world without fault, but without positives as well. That’s where Jonas comes in. He has been selected to be the Taker and the government may have taken too much of a risk here. Jonas’ job is to inherit the memories of humanity, but with these memories comes emotion, color….life! Will he really be content with keeping things at the status quo or will he decide to revolt…like so many figures in history?

This is definitely a very fascinating concept and it’s one that’s fun to think about. The lines aren’t so clearly divided into good and evil here as you can make a decent case for both. The case for why humans should have free will and emotions is a little more obvious so I will be brief on that. Living without free will is like not living at all and emotionlessly just accepting your fate is terrible. You are essentially told that you will be a mother at home or you will work in nursery for the women and the guys are thrown into a random job with no prior preparation or experience. They won’t like the job either, but at least they won’t dislike it right? No matter how you look at it, this existence wouldn’t be great and it’s also logically impossible. Of course, we’re ignoring that tidbit, but it’s unimaginable to not be able to see in color and not understand universals and emotion.

Scientifically speaking, I’m sure that it’s possible to remove the part of the eye rather painlessly that lets us see color on everyone. Removing emotions through a serum injection is certainly more sketchy. Also, you have to have the shot every day for it to actually work. Would the “rebels” really not “slip up” once or twice and then realize that something was amiss? Of course, this is ultimately still science fiction so trying to rationalize everything may not be very rational if you really think about it. I’ll just take this at face value for now.

Now, why would this be a good thing? Well, let’s start off with two of the big obstacles in the real. (“In the Real is a term used in Accel World to distinguish the real world from cool cyber worlds and I rather like the term so I may use it once in a while…for style!) World Hunger and Murder. These two things have been eliminated from the Earth entirely.* (*Unfortunately, babies are murdered every day in this world to keep the population stable, but they are simply “released” as far as the people know. They don’t know what death is and just believe that the person is gone…interesting. These guys better have perfect health tech or there will be unexpected releases sometimes…) Nobody wants to harm other people and billions of tragedies would simply never happen. If you’ve ever turned on the news you’ll know that millions suffer with every passing second. There is none of that here so that is an overwhelming positive that you simply cannot afford to ignore.

I think the fact that they were essentially murdering their own citizens at the end was where the film clearly starts to point to why you should be rooting for Jonas. It’s a painless death and typically it is willing since they cannot feel emotions. This was a one time exception because of what Jonas has done, but it definitely makes the others look more like villains. I’m still on the free will side for many reasons with the main one being that it is really what makes us who we are. It’s certainly a fun debate to tackle with in your head.

Jonas is not a great main character though. I just don’t like him and I felt like the writers were trying to make him a little too…over reactive. He was sort of showing us how we should be reacting to every scene and he didn’t seem to have any actual personality. He has a good excuse at first of course, but I still didn’t like him by the end. I felt like he really pushed his emotions onto Fiona. She didn’t know what romance is so she really couldn’t comprehend what was happening. Jonas had liked her from the start so it was different. It was just a romance that I really couldn’t get into and think that it was very unnecessary. It’s a sub plot that I definitely could have done without and it cost the film a star.

Fiona is actually a pretty good character as she stands by her friends (Unlike Asher) from start to finish. She is always looking out for Jonas and she risks her career and future to help him when the main hero is in a pinch. I do think that the romance was unnecessary, but this is one time where at least 90% of the blame should go to Jonas. Learning emotions for the first time can be a rather confusing experience after all. I imagine that it’s like trying to play a video game for the first time without a manual and holding the controller upside down. Now that would be confusing!

Is it just me or did the film try to make Jonas’ mother extremely antagonistic from the start? She would literally correct him every time he spoke and she seemed to almost despise him. Keep in mind that none of these characters actually have emotions. They demonstrate them a lot, but I guess that just shows that no serum can be 100% effective. The dad is more tempered and he seems to know more than he lets on, but that sub plot vanishes when he decides to go through with the releasing ceremony. He definitely didn’t know what that meant so maybe he just acted smarter than he was.

Asher is Jonas’ other friend and he definitely wasn’t good. Of course, he’s made to be unlikable since he represents the average person who quickly loses sight of all his aspirations and goals as he just follows what the government does without any questions. He has his big moment where he gets to try and stop Jonas, but let’s just say that he’s outmatched. None of the character even know what a fight is so they definitely can’t comprehend that the best way to stop an incoming punch is to parry or punch back.

The Chief Justice is another intriguing character since she has clearly been through a lot, but that isn’t really explained. We are left to guess and we are given pieces to the puzzle. We know that her heir suffered an untimely fate and it helped her to despise emotions, but then we have to wonder just how long ago the barrier was put up. I would guess that it was only recently from that (Last 20 years maybe) but other parts of the film hint that it’s been like this for many decades. It also makes sense since a big change like that could definitely not occur in such a short amount of time. She definitely has a lot of determination to help her keep things the way that they have been while her counterpart…The Giver has other ideas.

The Giver is the original keeper of the memories, but he doesn’t do a whole lot with his position. He could give everyone back their memories if he makes it past the barricade, but he’s old and he worries about what will happen to the town now if he should be away from it. Unfortunately, he’s a little sloppy and memories that he didn’t want to be shared are given pretty soon. He makes this mistake twice, which isn’t great for him. He’s ot a bad character, but I guess he’s not that good. He could have certainly done a better job during the memory transfers with Jonas and with his former pupil as well.

Now, I have mentioned that I think this plot would work better as a whole show or series. The reason why is mainly illustrated in the ending. After the barricade is breached…the film just ends. You can imagine that the world will quickly be plunged into chaos and it’ll be interesting to see what happens next. Will they go back to creating wars and become corrupt like the Chief Justice believes or will they unite and stand as one? The former is more likely, but it’s still an interesting situation to watch. Alternately, they also could have shown this emotionless world more so that we can really contrast it to natural life. Achieving all of this in about 90 minutes is a tough feat to be sure. I suppose that the concept itself is what’s important though and we can just put together the unseen pieces.

Overall, The Giver is a very interesting movie. As I mentioned, my main problem with it is the romance. I just found it distasteful and it certainly does impact how much you will enjoy the film. Beyond that, I definitely enjoyed it and the concept is certainly a winner. There isn’t really any action to be found besides a short scuffle and chase scene, but the writing is strong enough to hold the film together. I definitely recommend checking the film out since it will pose some nice philosophical questions for you to answer. I do think that the concept is a little too broad for a film, but I suppose that it did the best that it could. My stance on the ending is that most of the survivors were thrown inside of the barricade, but a few rebels managed to hide out in the outside world where they kept their memories and got to continue the human race as it used to be. That’s just my 2 cents on the ending so you’re free to speculate on it.

Overall 6/10

Charlie’s Angels Full Throttle Review

Posted on December 11, 2014 by dreager1

The Angels are back and they’re better than ever…..or are they? The sequel falls into many of the same holes as the first film and it still doesn’t make for a good viewing experience. It’s hard to really enjoy the fights when you have to cringe because one of the main characters has let out another wince worthy line. The fanservice may have been reduced a lot at first, but the film makes sure to correct that in the second half. All I can say is…this doesn’t bode well for the franchise as a whole.

The film starts out with a pretty sad scene in the desert that can really sum up the film. The three angels realize that they are going to have to use their physical attributes to solve the case once again so Natalie handles that part while her partners try to free a captive. The captive trips and busts a rib so the distraction doesn’t work as well as they thought. Alex has the foresight to say something along the lines of “They don’t stand a chance” when the captive mentions how it’s just the three of them against 50 beer guzzlers. Then….the Angels are unable to take down almost any of them. They all go into their poses, but one guy takes out a gun. Obviously, this means that they should run away so they dive out the window with the guy who has a broken rib. No worries…he endures the fall.

The writers must have realized that this was an utterly terrible way to show us how tough the main characters are so he fixes that by giving us an over the top moment where the heroes free fall onto a helicopter as they dodge the blades several times until they safely grab on to it. It doesn’t look believable in any setting, but I suppose that it’ll have to do. The real mission involves recovering two rings that can leak the identities of all undercover operatives on the planet or just from the U.S.A. The villains already have both rings so they’ve probably downloaded the names onto a USB drive by now, but the heroes are confident that the villains would never do such a thing! The villains are waiting until someone buys the rings from them to make a move and they wouldn’t want to copy the data as insurance or anything…..it would violate the buyer’s trust after all!

Now that we’ve talked about the rather shaky plot, let’s discuss some of the film’s negatives. I suppose that we should tackle the whole fanservice part first. If there was ever a film that openly supported sexism and objectification it was Charlie’s Angels. I have to assume that the show was better, but this film quickly follows that. The heroines are always completing their jobs by using false deductive skills or just wooing the villains. Natalie uses quite a few double entendre in a short amount of time to distract the villain so that the other two agents could do some recon. It’s just sad to see because you know that this wouldn’t be the case if a guy was the main character. I try not to pull that card too often since you could probably go around in circles discussing it in various films, but this one makes it too easy. Would James Bond have ran away from a room full of guys if he was with two other 009 agents? I have a feeling that he would not, but I suppose that it is debatable. He does go around seducing people, but he typically does it for the lulz since he is already solving the case.

The worst scene is easily the nightclub one where the Angels are reduced to being strippers who dance for perverted people’s entertainment. It’s sad that they are so committed to their job since anyone with an ounce of self respect would have told Charlie to think of a real plan. He probably didn’t think of this one, but none of the Angels should have either. Remember…there is always another way. One that will keep their dignity with them! Before that, the fanservice was bad, but not as all over the place as the first film. This one had sooooo much that it basically threw that feat out the window.

Romance is always on the minds of the three main characters and I like to think that it certainly holds them back. It clouds their judgment and it makes them look pretty bad. Hitting on surfers or even the local jogger is something that you will see them do. Keep in mind that two of them are supposedly taken already. There is a really rushed romance plot with Dylan since she doesn’t have someone yet, but it just makes her look bad and it doesn’t help the Thin Man either. He was one of the villains from the last film who vanished without a trace. He appears here for a quick race (Where he crashes headfirst into a road and there is an explosion, but he gets up like nothing happened because the script probably didn’t finish that part up) and then a spar with the main villain of the film. He and Dylan then share a moment of passion before he is quickly terminated and you are left wondering what just happened. They’re really stretching it here with how quickly a romance can just start up and it’s sad. Dylan is still my least favorite Angel although I suppose that this isn’t saying a whole lot.

Seamus is the big villain of the film or I guess you can say that he’s just the sub villain. He’s got his own plan in all of this, but he’s technically still a lackey to Madison. (Albeit, unknowingly) He wants to destroy Dylan because she sold him out to the police,m which is pretty petty so the film actually portrayed him accurately there. Thus, he’s about as unlikable as you would expect. The film once again tries to show that just training a little in jail can get you onto the same level as one of the Angels. He is able to give Dylan a pretty good fight and that’s more than a little sad for her. In the “epic” confrontation scene where it’s him and some gang members it would have been fun to have seen a big fight. Seamus basically embodies the whole “One and Done” theme for villains that we see in the films. He’s unlikable from start to finish so you’ll probably forget him pretty quickly.

“I was never good…I was great!” is Madison’s most memorable lines since she’s crying and the actress was probably hoping for an Oscar Nomination there. There’s no reason for her to cry there, but she is a little deranged so I suppose that it’s fitting. For the most part, she’s actually a pretty good villain, but she shows her true colors in the climax where she spends too much time bragging to remember that there are 3 Angels on the loose. Losing her guns after that was also rather embarrassing. She is a good fighter though and I have a feeling that she was a better angel than the 3 new members. Too bad she went over to the dark side.

The main three angels are as unlikable as in the first film. Natalie gets her obligatory dance scene at the beginning where she is joined by the other two this time and she plays the seduction card the most. I could have sworn that she had an iconic line where she said “Bring it on _______” but I didn’t recall hearing it this time. It also sums up her character a little since just saying “Bring it On” is intense enough as a catchphrase. She has a romance subplot that gives her another dance scene, but it certainly doesn’t help her case. Dylan is pretty much written out of the film for a while, but her subplot is a major factor in the plot. She decides to leave the team for about 5-10 minutes because she is worried that staying with them will result in their untimely demise. What she does not suspect is that joining forces with them won’t make a whole lot of difference.

Alex isn’t great either because she keeps up a pretense that is bad for the Dad. It’s a really unnecessary subplot that fills the Dad with sad ideas about what his daughter has become. He never finds out the truth as the film ends either so he really got the short end of the stick. Even ignoring the subplot, Alex just isn’t much better than the other two. She’s still in the romance fad even though she has a boyfriend, which is pretty unacceptable to be honest. You should probably leave the team once you are romantically involved with someone.

A solid soundtrack was one of the only positives for the first film, but it was unsurprisingly changed to a more generic array of songs in this film. We even get the retro Hollywood theme, which is fun, but basically public domain. The fights are also typically a highlight and I will admit that they do put some life into the film. It was cool to see Madison take out the three angels with her superb marksmanship and I think that was when we all realized that some plot hax would probably be necessary in the climax. As least the film tried to be subtle about it, but it was still pretty sad.

On a final note, a new Bosley joined the crew here. I definitely didn’t buy his Irish scene where he tricked someone into letting him in by pulling the race card. It’s a well played card for the most part, but I just don’t see it working here. It’s hard to say whether he beats the old Bosley or not, but he actually might. He’s very down to Earth and he’s excited about being a part of the team. That means that he’s completely immune to the Angels’ tricks and the whole romance game is beneath him. His Home Run at the end was also pretty intense and I applauded his bold effort in Clue. If you’re going to play a board game, you should always be confident of your imminent victory. He was actually better than…100% of the cast. I hardly liked the rest of the characters so it’s not an immense feat, but we’ll take it.

Overall, Full Throttle is an apt title for the film since it really just plunges into just about every film hole that you can think of. We had way too much fanservice and romance in this film and the plot wasn’t very well thought out. There are too many subplots for the film to handle as well since we have old Angels coming virtually and physically as well as the guy who wants to destroy Dylan because of their tragic history. This is the kind of film that should be good popcorn fun, but it just isn’t because of all the unnecessary content. I definitely can’t recommend this film to anyone and you’re better off staying away from the franchise as a whole. I plan on getting the Gamecube video game for the Charlie’s Angels since it can help to partially restore the franchise’s rep, but we shall see. Until then, watch the animated Wonder Woman film for a better depiction of how a female warrior gets her point across.

Overall 1/10

Pitch Perfect Review

Posted on December 4, 2014 by dreager1

If you’ve been a loyal follower of my blog reviews then you can probably tell that this is not going to be a positive review. How could it be when it’s a musical that basically revolves around fan service and suggestive material? The poster can basically sum up the film, but you still can’t judge a film until you’ve seen a few pics or a still and watching the whole thing gives you more credibility as well. Let’s see where it messed up.

There are a few A Capella groups that compete across the various districts in Regional Tournaments. They make all of the music and sounds using just their mouths so no instruments are allowed. One year, one of the schools panics and the victory ends up going to the Treblemakers. Well, a year has passed and the girls decide that they are going to win this year. The problem is that there are only two members left so they go to recruit some people.

This takes us to the main character. Her name is Beca and she’s not a very sociable person. She just wants to be a DJ so she blows off her classes once she arrives at this new college. Her father is a professor there and he tells her that if she sticks with a club until the end of the year and still doesn’t like it…he’ll help her find a place in L.A. to become a DJ. She ~~actually~~ believes this and quickly decides to join the A Capella group alongside Fat Amy. Other girls quickly join the club through tryouts (The club just picks them all since they’re desperate) and now the girls have a chance to win the tournament and get everyone to admit that the Trebelmakers are last year’s news. Speaking of which….the Trebelmakers bring in a new guy as well. He happens to be Beca’s coworker so he’s pretty talented. This could be a close match!

It’s a little hard to know where to start when discussing this film. It’s basically a modernized Bring It On and the scary part is that it actually may contain more fanservice and suggestive material. That is saying a Lot if you are familiar with Bring It On. Of course, I haven’t seen that film in quite a long time so it’s possible that it’s still the much worse film. You just can’t get away from all of the inappropriate jokes and lines. It’s almost literally every other sentence so you’re basically doomed as soon as it has begun.

The “Big” scenes also don’t do it for me. You know the kind of scene that I mean right? The one where the audience is supposed to jump up and say thing like “Hey!” “All right” or “That’s what I’m talking about.” Action scenes where this applies is: When Coulson shoots Loki, Superman tackles Zod, or when Godzilla blasts Muto. So, our equivalent here might be when Beca starts to sing on stage as she wrecks Aubrey’s plan, When she jumps in during the underground tournament, or when she leads them into their final song. These are the “Big” moments for the film, but I can safely say that I didn’t get up and start cheering. It’s simply a different kind of scene and not one that I can get into. (It helps that she was rapping in the second scene) They were bold moves on her part, but that’s about all that I can say for it. It didn’t help me like her more as a character.

Beca is basically your average main character for this kind of film. The twist is that she can be a little goth, but she is actually a nice person deep down. She likes DJ a lot so she is familiar with rap songs. This comes back to bite her later since A Capella groups simply don’t rap. (The Trebepmakers evidently forget this as they rap for their final song.) Beca is pretty reasonable at first sonce she decides that she is mot going to fall for the romance trap. You can imagine that this definitely did not last long. She falls into all of the tropes that you would expect her to fall into, but that definitely doesn’t help her character.

Aubrey is the mean leader who is always living in the past. I can respect the fact that she heavily enforces the anti romance rules for the club, but she doesn’t have the best reasoning for it. It is definitely hard to find her likable so I am sure that we were all hoping that Beca would take the reins sooner than later.

Chloe is Aubrey’s partner and she could be the best main character in theory. It is a little “by default” but we will take it. She is nice to Beca and she revolts against Aubrey’s leadership at times, but she still isn’t a very good character. She should have been a little bolder in her quest to win the tournament. Taking the lead like Beca did would have helped with that.

~~Fat~~ Amy is the fan favorite character who gets a pretty big role. She’s the one who brings a lot of the main characters together in the first place. She’s portrayed to be the overweight character who’s actually pretty smart and well versed in the ways of the world. It makes you feel bad for the other characters at times since they are so outmatched. That being said, she’s still not very likable. She falls into all of the faults that the other characters possess and she’s too interested in the romance angle. (All of them are to an extent though)

There are other members of the main squad, but they don’t really have much of a role in this story. Lilly’s gimmick was particularly annoying since her voice was so soft that nobody could hear her. You know what that means right? We get a scene at the end where she begins to rap and all of the characters are blown away. At the very least, the audience is supposed to do a double take. One member seems to be there just so we can have some more jokes to make about how easy the guys are.

Jesse is the main guy, but he’s a pretty bad character from start to finish. Beca keeps trying to stay as platonic friends during the intro of the film, but Jesse won’t have that for a second. This is a film so naturally they both become pretty close by the end, but then Jesse quickly deserts Beca after one of her outbursts. He started things so it looks kind of sad for him to be rushing out so quickly. He’s also a talented singer though, which is pretty lucky for him considering the circumstances. Now he can stay relevant to the plot. He definitely didn’t do anything for me.

The leader of the Trebelmakers is the main villain and he’s as sad as you would expect. He’s actually pretty good and his team won the tournament many times in the previous years. If he was a nice person, things would probably be very different. That being said, you can’t blame him for ditching the team to become rich and famous. He definitely could have told his teammates about this in a nicer way, but that’s just how his character is. I’m pretty sure that we would all make a similar decision or maybe try to do both, but we would certainly not let go of the money.

The announcers for the shows are good when they’re insulting all of the competitors, but that’s about all that they are good for. They still make way too many crude jokes so that you can’t actually enjoy what they are saying. The film seemed like it just wanted to go overboard in every way possible. The stereotype that every guy is perverted is also getting really old very quickly. It makes them look soooo terrible.

Finally, the film lost a lot of points on the actual singing and dancing. At least have them sing some respectable songs! The heroes are typically using their bodies to wow the audience and the lyrics can be forgettable. I was actually rooting for the Trebelmakers based on their songs for a while, but then their final one just threw that out the window. The main characters are basically objectifying themselves in order to win a simple trophy and that’s hardly worth the effort. It’s also pretty degrading to their characters to participate in this.

The film doesn’t really have much of a soundtrack beyond the musical parts, but I didn’t really enjoy the songs. The film is really just a bundle of negatives for me that have been rolled into a film. It’s pretty enjoyable in the few instances where there are no crude lines, but that’s like eating a giant bowl of tomatoes (Or insert food that you don’t like) to find a chocolate chip. So, I really can’t say that the film had any pros. The script just doomed it instantly and the fanservice certainly didn’t help matters.

Overall, Pitch Perfect is about what you would expect. It’s the kind of film that I couldn’t recommend to a guy on principle. Technically, it’s more or less okay for all others, but you can still find something nicer to enjoy like Yugioh. The fanservice is just too much as it corrodes the film and every character is basically objectified. The songs also tend to be pretty edgy and the rapping didn’t help matters. This just shows how bad a script can be when film writers don’t know what to do except for the classic rule that fanservice sells. There’s also a scene that shows us how an animal has been mistreated for a while, which is supposed to be funny, but just made the film sink a little more. Seriously, go watch High School Musical instead!

Overall 1/10

Charlie’s Angels Review

Posted on November 28, 2014 by dreager1

Well, it’s been a little over 2 years since I last saw this film, which brings it up to 2-3 times that I’ve seen it so far. It’s a pretty neat concept and I’ve heard that the show was pretty good, but the film has a lot of flaws that are barely hidden beneath the surface. It had a lot of potential thanks to some of the techniques that they used, which will remind you of the good ole films, but it’s simply not enough.

Charlie’s Angels is actually one of those films that can make you really worried for a Wonder Woman or Ms. Marvel film. Let’s just say that if one of those films was like this one, it would make audiences around the world shudder. A 30% on Rotten Tomatoes would likely shock me as it could be even lower. This one is spared that because of when it came out. I can guarantee that if this film came out now it would make waves…and not the good kind!

The plot involved a multi billionare (Probably) named Charlie. He hires three women to work for him as they stop crimes that no ordinary police force ever could. Their missions are dangerous, but these women are even deadlier! Natalie, Dylan, and Alex are the three main characters and they’re all pretty different, but are about equal in overall fighting technique. (Very, Very arguable) Well, they finish another mission when they find out that a computer whiz has been kidnapped. He has created a tech that can figure out a person’s voice print pretty quickly. It’s like tapping a phone, but it works on the actual voice. The Angels must find him and stop this from getting into the wrong hands.

Now, I just have to point something out about the premise that is pretty interesting. The climax involves Charlie making a phone call and the villain stalling him to try and figure out his location through the voice prints. It’s like a GPS and using some satellites he can track him down. That’s cool….until you remember that we can actually tap phones nowadays and you can track a person’s real location without inventing some made up technology about the voice prints. So, why is the voice print even necessary? Your guess is as good as mine…….the only way out of this logic hole would be if phone tracers had not been invented yet, but I’m pretty sure that they have been.

Okay, let’s quickly digress into some of the positives for the film. It has a very Dragon Ball Evoloution feel to it, which works pretty well. We get a lot of slow motion, interesting action shots, and facial expressions that would make film creators proud. It’s hard to describe how it feels like “That” kind of film, but watch any classic video game or manga inspired film like the one I just mentioned or the original Street Fighter and you’ll get my jist.

The soundtrack is also very intense. I can’t confirm that the lyrics for all of the songs are okay since some of the songs can be sketchy, but others were great. We got some really fast paced rock/battle themes that were all over the place and it made the scenes a whole lot more fun. It’s the kind of soundtrack that would never win you an Oscar, but that’s actually a good thing in this case. Oscar films can actually have some good tunes as well, but never anything quite like this. For every good song, there is still a bad song as well to highlight the fact that this film still uses a lot of not very subtle fanservice in between (and during) fight scenes. Ah well, I’ll take what I can get I suppose!

Dylan is my least favorite member of the Angels so I’ll start with her. She’s a decent fighter like the others, but she comes off as more of a tom boy. That doesn’t stop her from using her charm to seduce the characters that she can, but it ultimately results in a pretty embarrassing moment for her. Let’s just say that you should never start hanging out with a suspect so casually unless you want to get burned. Even without that scene she was likely my least favorite, but it certainly didn’t help her case.

Natalie is more laid back, but she still needs romance in her life so she quickly brings in a bar tender that she met and they instantly made it past the bounds of friendship. That was quick and then she went off to continue fighting and saving the world. Again, I find it hard to like her at all since she needs to have more hobbies aside from romance. She danced for a while, but it was pretty bad and again..it didn’t help her case.

Alex is the final member and she already has a stable romance going so she’s already set from the get go. Again, it’s hard to like the Angels because they don’t seem to have much of a personality beyond the romance. It’s quite sad. They are also willing to do just about anything to complete their mission so you almost start to feel bad for their boyfriends. (Almost! They’re not exactly innocent either) She can fight as well, which is good since you would be doomed otherwise against the villains.

Bosley is another one of the main characters and he looks pretty bad. One of his first scenes has him give the girls a long speech about love and how they can make it stronger while they’re basically mocking him and then he proceeds to get tricked by one of the main villains. (Naturally, the villain was female) He has enough strength of mind to tell her that he was going to keep it professional, but he still looked really terrible by letting her in the house from the start. You don’t do that when you have a billion dollar program inside and the person outside the door is a suspect.

There’s not much to say about Charlie. He’s rich and he’s old, but he barely gets to appear. At least he reminds the Angels that he’s watching over them before sending them on extremely dangerous missions. One of the main villains is known as the Thin Man and he’s pretty awesome…at first. We find out that he has something for hair and he gets a little too emotionally involved in that aspect. You just knew that the film would find some way to wreck his character. He started out as a really serious villain as he took on the three main characters. By the end, he was reduced to getting clobbered in a one on one fight and basically running for the hills. No worries…he’ll be back!

It may not sound that bad from all of that, but there is one ultimate reason why it was doomed right from the get go. The fanservice! This could probably hold its own against just about anything else in this area. You’ll get a scene that fits this description in almost every scene in the film. Whether the heroes are seducing someone to distract him or just striking unnecessary poses, it’s just sad. Every male character is presented to be someone who’s heads over heels for them. The guys just care about their outer appearance and none of them are morally ethical. It’s pretty sad to see guys depicted like this. It’s actually common place to an extent, but certainly not to this level. Even in James Bon….well, it’s basically at the same level. It’s just more fanservice than actually going further while it’s the opposite in James Bond.

An example of this is the traditional planning scene where the heroes explain what the security is like. The camera quickly zooms in on their mouth so we can have some really awkward visuals to distract us from what they’re actually saying. It’s pretty cringe worthy. It’s what drives this film down to Sucker Punch levels. Of course, Sucker Punch didn’t suffer from fanservice, but that’s another story. It’s a sad coincidence that those two films are down at the 1’s because they both could have been very good. What happened? The film just needed a different director and writer and then maybe it could have stood a chance.

After all, the fight scenes are pretty good when they happen. At one point, the three Angels team up to fight someone and he actually holds his own against the three of them for a while. It’s fun to watch, but it definitely doesn’t make the main characters look impressive. How can the three of them be having such a tough time when it’s so early in the film? Obviously, the writers forgot that you’re supposed to make the characters very likable and strong before you give them a villain that they can’t defeat.

The two main villains are pretty bad as well. One of them has a gun, but she’s still strong enough to give one of the Angels a tough time in hand to hand combat. If someone who seems like she doesn’t have that much time to train can give them a good fight….just how tough are the Angels? It definitely makes you wonder. The guy is very weak, but he knows that the main characters are always using their charms so he just uses that to his advantage. A surprisingly cunning strategy, but it never would have worked on a halfway decent character. Never!

Overall, Charlie’s Angels isn’t any better than I remember it. The film still puts too much emphasis on the heroes’ bodies and not enough on their character. Every other scene will have you looking away or wincing because you know that the film is just getting started. The soundtrack is pretty good and the actual plot is so retro that it still works despite the logical errors. It’s simply not enough to overlook this and it won’t help the feminist position. Let’s face it, we’d never have a film where three guys are constantly being used for fanservice throughout the film. It wouldn’t happen. Instead of checking out this film, watch the original Mortal Kombat to see how the film could have/should have/would have gone if the writers had realized sooner what they had done. There was simply tooooooo much fanservice here and I can’t stress enough just how sad it was. I highly recommend skipping it, no matter what type of film you’re looking for.

Overall 1/10

White Christmas Review

Posted on November 24, 2014 by dreager1

The holidays are almost upon us and that means that Christmas is coming! It’s easily still one of the biggest days of the year and it always will be. There’s nothing quite as epic as watching a Christmas film to bring on the holiday cheer. This title came out in 1954 so it had to come to blows with the original Godzilla film, but if anything can give it a good fight…it’s this title! It’s a pretty fun Christmas film that has its flaws, but manages to still capture the Christmas spirit.

The film starts out with the army having trouble holding their ground. They manage to do all right for themselves and that’s where Bob and Phil step in. It was an ordinary day on the job for them until a wall collapses and Phil saved Bob at the expense of his arm. It was sprained or maybe broken. To repay his debt, Bob agrees to work as a duet with Phil and they become a global sensation. They get a letter from one of their old army buds a while later to check out a possible sister act and that’s when the film really starts. The plot shifts after the two guys and the two girls all head up to Vermont where a struggling hut is trying to stay afloat. Can this motel/hotel/lodge be saved by the combined efforts of these performers? Time to find out!

Well, it’s more or less what you would expect from a classic romantic comedy. The writing is pretty strong and it easily shatters the kind of film that they would make nowadays in this genre. The banter is always around and the characters are decently likable. Bob was actually pretty cool for the majority of the film, but then he crumbled towards the end and he couldn’t get back up on his high horse. One aspect of the film that probably didn’t do it any favors was its run time of 2 hours. I do think that 2 hours is the minimum length for a film, but you have to come up with a lot of good scenes if you want it to work. Most of the scenes are pretty good, but they probably could have cut out a few songs during the film. It would have sped up the plot progression a little. You know, the first half of the film actually goes perfectly for the four main characters, which is unheard of. All of the tension and drama is in the second half.

There is no real soundtrack, but this is a musical so I suppose that I can comment on the songs. The voices are pretty good for the most part so that isn’t an issue, but I didn’t care for the dances that went along with it. It’s like Spagetti and Pizza. They taste good together, but just give me the Spagetti and leave the Pizza for later! We don’t need singing and dancing to be done at the same time. I’m more or less okay with singing, but I could definitely have gone without the latter. At least most of the songs are Christmas related, which is always cool.

The main problem in the film that leads to the climax involves a misunderstanding between Bob and Betty, but I think it could have been handled better. As it stands, it makes Betty look pretty terrible since she is convinced that Bob has betrayed her without even giving him a chance to tell his side of the story. You should never go with third party information unless it’s absolutely necessary. She definitely overreacted there and I only blame Bob for the part where he says that they should try to get things back to how they were the other day. He could have phrased that in a much better way since that made it look like he just wanted some romance.

Speaking of which, Bob was pretty cool for a while. He was pretty good at the musicals and he was a solid army guy. He was pretty nice and he was always willing to help a pal out. He knows that Phil will trick him at every opportunity, but he still lets him hang around. Then, Betty and Judy appear and things start to get dicey for Bob. He handles the whole romance thing decently at first, but then he gets thanked by the assistant at the lodge and everything about his character gets smashed to pieces. It’s meant to be a funny scene, but it was pretty terrible and made him look like a pretty desperate person. It’s really hard to bounce back from something like that.

Likewise, Betty was a decent character until the whole misunderstanding happened. Then, that made her look pretty bad and it went on for a while, which certainly did not help her case. She found a pretty spiffy new job in about a day, which certainly says something about her talents as a singer, but just leaving the state like that was certainly not the right thing to do in this situation.

Phil likes to use his fake arm injury to blackmail Bob, but he is technically just doing it in a joking way. He’s a pretty nice guy and he really looks out for Bob. That being said, he basically falls into the love at first sight angle in an instant and he basically cornered into engaging someone due to political interests of both parties. He’s a decent character through and through for the most part, but I can’t say that I am a fan of his. Likewise, Judy doesn’t have as much time to get development as Betty since she is shoved to the side with Phil as far as the plot is concerned. She is the character who kicks things off with the plot twist though so she is pretty crucial in how the whole thing played out. Without her on stage appearances, the play could have crumbled.

There were a few other characters like The General and his assistant, but they aren’t extremely crucial to the story. The General wants to join the Army again instead of living in such a peaceful place, but I have to disagree with his notion. He apparently spent all of his retirement savings on the place so ditching it now would not be a good idea at all. He made for a pretty good general and he’s possibly the best character in the film, but he’s mostly relegated to the sidelines. He makes sure to talk tough until the very end! His assistant wasn’t that good since she is the one who causes the big problems in the film. It’s good that she knows what is going on at all times, but she should have done a little more research before making her big announcement.

The romance can be a bit much as the second half of the film is full of it. The first half was pretty light in that respect and I can safely say that it was a lot better than the second half. The writing really gets to shine while Bob is still antagonistic and having a civil debate with Phil. That slowly starts to change as the film went on and you can’t help, but think that the film could have been pretty fun if they had just been rivals to the two girls. That would have certainly been an interesting twist right? One thing I can say for the film is that there are no really bad scenes just as there are no Great ones. It’s simply a good, retro Christmas story. (One song happens so suddenly that I thought it was a parody)

Overall, White Christmas is a good film. Considering that one of the genres is basically romance, it certainly handles itself better than you would expect. I do think that they should have dialed down some of the dancing and maybe eliminated a song or two to make things better though. The romance can also be a little more frequent than you may like, but at least we have the beginning where they are all just friends for a while. It’s the kind of film that’s pretty happy from start to finish and it’s certainly a good way to get set for Christmas. I recommend it to you if this film sounds like it’s your thing and if you want an alternative, just check out Jingle All The Way.

Overall 5/10

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