Pitch Black is the first film that features Riddick (Or Carolyn, depending on how you look at it) as the main character. The poster definitely promises a horror film that will keep you at the edge of your seat. Does this work as a horror film? More importantly, what about those fight scenes!? Find out all of that and more as the review unfolds.

A crew’s spaceship goes through space, but something goes wrong and there is a fatality. It’s definitely a quick way to start the film and I’m sure that not many were expecting the cast to be whittled down so quickly. They crash land on a mysterious planet and quickly gather their bearings. They had been transporting a dangerous prisoner by the name of Riddick. He definitely wasn’t to be trusted, but what would they do with him now? Riddick does make an escape attempt, but things don’t go so well.

Another member of the crew is devoured and then the cast finally realizes the gravity of the situation. They release Riddick and decide that they’ll need to work together in order to get out alive. The plan is simple: They will grab the power cells and use them to launch their solar powered ship out of their and maybe get back to their planet. (Earth…..right?…) Unfortunately, the inhabitants of this planet have ideas of their own.

Well, one thing that makes this film interesting is the use of the 3 Suns planet. Since the planet has 3 suns, the film has a green edge to it. It feels like you’re watching a black and white film, but slathered with a green paint. It was pretty interesting to watch and it was definitely unique. Of course, once the planet gets dark..it stays dark. Riddick is able to see through the dark with his eye, but will that be enough of an edge to survive?

The monsters/aliens in this film are similar to Pterodactyls. They can fly and one good bite could prove to be the end for a human. As far as physical strength goes, they’re about as tough as an average wild animal. Like a Bull for instance, so a human may be able to overpower one of them, but it’s not so simple. Not everyone can use what they’ve learned on paper to keep a Shark’s mouth closed so that he can’t bite them. The aliens are quick and they usually come out during the dark. (I wonder why….)

The cast isn’t very strong in this film, but that tends to be the norm. Carolyn becomes the leader, but it’s more of a “By Default” type of position. “The end justifies the means” seems to be her way of thinking. Towards the end, she has her hero moments, but she did take time to make her decision. I’m not saying that she’s an awful character, but not a great one. Riddick? Well, he’s your average thug villain, who may have the potential for good in him. I don’t know about this, but when he’s properly goaded, he can be tricked into doing the right thing. He’s decently skilled, but not extraordinarily so.

John is another member and well….there is a plot twist about him. He’s pretty unlikable and you could say that he’s the main villain. It’s ironic since Riddick was supposed to be the big villain, but John seems to have less morals and is probably deeper into the side of evil. Does he make it through the film? Erm…..when was the last time, the “jerk” character made it to the end? Not going to say if this guy breaks the trend, but think about it.

Now, disclaimer time! This review is based off of an edited version that I saw, which edited out the language and made the film a TV 14. So, unless you can find an edited version, this film has a Ton of excessive language. The violence can also get pretty graphic, so if you’re squeamish about people being ripped apart and heads getting crunched….you may want to skip on this one. So, if you’re thinking about bringing a kid to watch this…I’d advise against that. Just a fair warning from your epic blogger DReager1!

So, in the end, did this film work as a horror film? Well, I guess we had a couple of “Jump out” moments, but the film had more tension than actual scary scenes. I guess, if you found Jaws scary, then this should fill the bill. There isn’t really romance in this film, but do I recommend it? For those of you who like horror/alien tales, you’ll probably enjoy it, but there are definitely better options out there. If you’re looking for a “deep” plot and some epic dialogue…what are you doing here? This wasn’t exactly a great film and calling it “good” may be a bit of a stretch. I can’t say that it was my favorite, but it’s better than some other horror titles. like Haunting in Connecticut If you want a movie that will chill you to the bone, check out Bleach: Hell Verse!

Overall 3/10

Colombiana is one of those films where the protagonist has a gun and you just know that someone’s going to take his last walk. The poster gives you a Salt/Tomb Raider feel so this could be good news if you enjoyed those films. One thing that didn’t help was the trailer, which I found to be pretty awful personally. The actual movie is better than the trailer, but was it good enough to be considered a good movie?

Cataleya is the main character of the film and some may consider her a Hero. If you consider Light Yagami, The Punisher, or the Superior Spiderman as heroes, then by all means! She would definitely be heroic, but I don’t really consider those guys to be heroes. Goku, Superman……Bionic Bunny! Those guys did their duty and stayed with their morals. Cataleya’s big mission is to avenge her parents and destroy anyone who gets in her way! It will take some time to climb up the mafia list, so she makes a name for herself as she bumps more and more people off.

The plot is pretty basic which is (Almost) always a good thing. This means that the film can spend less time on the plot and more time on the action. There is also a character by the name of Danny. (Hardcore name, but awful character) Saying that he was an awful character is a bit strong, but I definitely did not like him. I don’t know…I just felt that he was a disgrace to such a cool name. Ignoring that guy, there weren’t many subplots in the film. We had the cliched FBI vs CIA fight, (Which never gets old! Honestly, it’s always the best part of the films) I wasn’t really sure who to root for. I guess I would go with the FBI, but they’re always so much weaker for some reason. I wish that this plot would have gotten more screen time, since it was pretty intense.

This film does have a lot of romance which can definitely bring down the movie for you. Cataleya and Danny are already not good characters, so this helps them to be that much worse. Danny tries to be a “tough guy” and even gets some “hardcore” lines. Unfortunately, they don’t make him a more endearing character. Cataleya’s uncle is supposed to be someone that we can possibly root for, but the opening scene already shows that he’s a complete villain. Why root for him? Of course, Cataleya also becomes a villain so I guess everyone’s evil this time. I bet even Danny had a secret agenda.

So, would I recommend this film? Well, the film has some action scenes and one hand to hand fight, but there are also some things that hamper it down. The romance is a bigger subplot than usual and the character cast is astonishingly unlikable. Cataleya’s scene where she spits out the disk is pretty gross and can also be a quick turn off. There’s the usual summer blockbuster violence, but I can’t remember anything that was unthinkably violent or wince worthy. If you’ve seen Jaws or Terminator, then you’ll be okay……if you want a real movie where the main character uses a gun…I don’t know what to tell you. (Maybe when this film gets a sequel, we’ll have something) If you want to watch a show where the main character has a gun, check out Black Cat!

Overall 3/10

Vertigo is a pretty big movie from the late 50’s. I’m sure that most of us know what the term Vertigo means, so I’ll skip that part. Alfred Hitchcock tends to make a lot of mystery movies and this one is no exception. The actual mystery doesn’t start until the later part of the film, unless you debate whether there’s a….Ghost involved! Let’s see how epic this film turned out.

Joh-Scottie is the main character of the film and he’s pretty terrible, but more on that later. He’s a retired detective who had to stop being a policeman when he led someone to their doom. It was an accident and the guy practically lunged off of the roof, but Sco-John knew that he needed to retire. Now he lives the happy life, no stress, no pressure! Unfortunately, someone wants him to complete one last assignment. (Sound like James Bond or Batman yet?) Jo-Scottie accepts and his mission is to follow the man’s wife: Madeleine. He fears that she is being possessed by a ghost. Sc-John follows her to a lot of placed and eventually she jumps in a river. Her body is able to float amidst the water so at least there is no chance of drowning, but John- I mean Scottie! Decides to save her. She escapes yet again and John is back to square one. Is she being possessed? Is she just insane!?

The film had a very weak cast, but films tend to do that. The best character was easily the judge when they took the main character to court. This guy knew what he was talking about and he saw through the main character’s act with ease! This guy was definitely an intellectual and not someone who should be messed with. John/Scottie suffers from delusions and he basically cracks towards the second half of the film. I would have felt bad for him, had he not been such an awful protagonist. You can’t even call him a hero since his short sighted, immoralistic (Is that a word? Well, now it is!) actions quickly turn him into the antagonist. Towards the end, you aren’t even sure who you should root for anymore! (I decided to just watch the two villains duke it out with an expression of horror on my face!) It’s really too bad, since the main character was pretty good at the beginning. He stayed solid until he took on the mission, which is where he slowly (But steadily) went downhill. The other characters were pretty unmemorable, but Judy Barton made some pretty big mistakes. Sometimes you shouldn’t wear things from the crime scene….

Overall this movie wasn’t one of Hitchcock’s better films. I do applaud the fake out endings, (Did you think that Avengers had a lot of those? This one has around 5 different scenes where the film “ends” and then starts up again. It was pretty epic, but one of the fake endings beat the real one. Only one of them though, I did enjoy the real ending since it was a pretty epic twist) but it wasn’t enough to keep the film afloat. It was just too long and suffered from the main characters. I recommend the film if you want to see a film where the main characters gets to leap across buildings, but otherwise, check out Man of Steel. He may not jump over them, but flying’s pretty good as well!

Overall 3/10

Alright, The Grandmaster is a film that many of you may not have heard of. It is based off of a “True story”. Ever heard of Ip Man? Well, he’s Bruce Lee’s teacher and apparently he was extremely tough. The film likely exaggerated his strength, but that was the fun part, so we should definitely let it slide. Usually films that are based off of real life are pretty awful, but since this one is action oriented, maybe that won’t hold true.

The Grandmaster starts off with an ambitious beginning. Ip Man has a big fight against a group of warriors and he skillfully makes short work of them. All of his opponents go down pretty quickly except for one warrior who manages to put up some resistance. There is never a question of who will win the battle, but I’m glad that at least one warrior tried to do something. The whole scene was very cool, but there was one problem with it….This scene completely destroyed the rest of the film. Sometimes, you should try not to start out so epic. This is one of those rare occasions. The problem is that the rest of the film doesn’t feature an abundance of fights and the ones that came up were cool…just not quite as cool. The first scene set the tone, but the rest of the film just dropped it.

The film stayed at a solid level for a while as Ip Man becomes the representative for the South. He faced various martial artists of the South who used different fighting styles, but Ip Man proved to be much better than the others. The fights did make for some pretty epic scenes. One of his opponents mixed different fighting styles together, which is a pretty good way to fight. Ip Man’s form of Kung Fu only uses three different signs, but they are sufficient to win battles.

Ip Man also took on Gong Er. She was a pretty skilled fighter and the first to “Defeat” Ip Man. It was decided that whoever broke a piece of furniture first, would be the loser. At one point Ip Man tries to save Gong Er, but she didn’t need his help and that’s what led to his downfall. With the exception of one scene, this was where the movie deteriorated quickly. Ip Man left the country and wars broke out. People died and the audience felt like snoozing.

Luckily, we still had one fight scene left (2 If you count Ip Man’s fight for the teaching position). Gong Er challenged Ma San to avenge her father. Ma San is a pretty skilled warrior and he was known as the strongest in the North. It’s a shame that he never got to challenge Ip Man. Gong Er and Ma San have a pretty solid fight and they both give it their all. The loser is humbled and the victor goes away feeling triumphant. After such a fight, I would expect nothing less!

The film should have ended there, but we get another half-hour of people talking, people dying, and people talking some more. You start to wonder what happened to Ip Man. Towards the end of the film, he vanished for a while and stopped being the main character. Gong Er replaced him in that regard and we got to see a little of her past. Gong Er and Ip Man were definitely the best main characters of the film. (Though I suppose that is not saying much.) Gong Er stayed strong to her vows and Ip Man beat up as many people as he could.

The Grandmaster is a film that suffered greatly from its length and lack of interesting characters. Had the film been cut down to around 70 minutes plus add some more fight scenes, this could have been one of the better films of 2013. I can’t say that I highly recommend this film, but if you like documentaries, then you should enjoy it. If you are willing to spend some money to see a good fight scene, you can also just come in and check the first few minutes. Of course, if you want a movie with real hand to hand fight scenes, check out Tekken Blood Vengeance!

Overall 3/10

Rope is a classic film that was made by Alfred Hitchcock. You’ve probably heard of him and I’ve seen some of his other films. I believe that I already reviewed one or two, but if not, now you’ll get to witness one. Rope is a classic mystery where the main characters (Well, really only Brandon) decide to tempt fate and see if their “Perfect murder” will come out all right.

The film starts out with David dying. It’s too bad since I’m sure that he could have been a decent character…hopefully anyway. The two murderers are the main characters; Brandon and Phillip. Brandon decides that the murder won’t be perfect unless they invite some people over and make this a fair contest. Brandon wants to test his intelligence against theirs and he also wants to feel the thrills of danger. Phillip is mortified, but he’s never able to stop Brandon from doing whatever he wants. The guests start to come in and things are going well….until Rupert walks in!

Rupert quickly became the best character in the film as he proceeded to completely obliterate Brandon’s chances for success. Brandon’s pretty cunning, but Rupert is an inquisitive person and he won’t be stopped so easily. The irony of the matter is that David’s body is in the same room with everyone. They are using the box that he is in, as the dinner table for the party. There are a lot of close shaves, but can Rupert actually solve this mystery?

The film is pretty suspenseful and it goes by quickly. The film basically takes place in the main room and they just talk for a while. A movie with nonstop talking may seem boring at first, but you never feel bored. I’m not sure if this would work in a modern movie, but I enjoy the dialogue in really old movies. Brandon makes for a pretty likable antagonist, but Phillip can be pretty annoying. He’s a villain, but he’s always doubting himself. Phillip keeps on getting nervous, but it’s far too late since he already committed the deed. Phillip nearly jeopardizes the mission several times and he does crack towards the end. The rest of the characters were pretty uneventful and they were mostly there to add drama. They never seemed to piece together the clues, but I like to think that they would have at some point.

This is a pretty fun film and I’d recommend it. The film isn’t very long and it holds up well. There may not be a lot of action or special effects, but not all films need that sort of thing. A lot of action can’t hurt, but this film manages to pull through without it. The mystery isn’t for the audience, which may be disappointing for some people, but then this would be a completely different movie. If you want a mystery to solve, check out Sherlock Holmes.

Overall 6/10