Tag Archives: Retro Film

The Man with the Golden Arm Review

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It’s time to look at another old film, but this one won’t fare any better than Harper. In fact, I’d say that Harper actually ends up having the edge here as this film’s main character may be worse than Harper He definitely doesn’t make a whole lot of correct choices and the subplot involving his wife can certainly tire you out very quickly. Granted, the film does sound better than the film, where the ending seems like it would be a little more dicey.

Frankie has just gotten out or rehab and he’s looking to get a new start on his life. He is getting our of the dealing game and he doesn’t intend to do drugs anymore. That being said, it’s tricky to keep to this goal as his wife is constantly trying to shoot his hopes down and she does not want him to succeed. She pretends to be incapable of walking to keep Frankie together with her. The guilt tripping tactics prove to be quite effective. Can Frankie end this cycle?

Well, this film definitely wasn’t for me. I’m all for a slice of life film, but this one wasn’t very interesting. Moreover, I never like watching the guilt tactics work on the heroes so easily. It’s similar to “Whatever Happened To Baby Jane” except it’s not quite that bad. At least Frankie can still leave, he just doesn’t really think about this option enough. His mistake if you ask me. The whole film his wife is pestering him and it gets really old fast. Not to mention that Frankie should have known that she could walk the instant that he found his drumsticks on top of the high drawer. That’s a little suspicious and the fact that she tries to sabotage his career the whole time is also a little iffy.

This film mainly deals with the problems of drugs and how addicting they can be. Any vice is extremely hard to break away from as any long time smoker can tell you. So, Frankie’s battle against it is fairly realistic even if it does take up way too much screen time in this film. The problem is that he keeps making all of the wrong choices over and over again even though he knows that it will cost him his job. It’s definitely a pretty serious addiction that he has going for him and if not for his wife, he probably would have beaten it right away. The stress just got to him though and then he kept on relapsing over and over again. It certainly doesn’t make for an enjoyable watch. So, while this is a topic that isn’t tackled all that much, it’s probably best to leave it for the documentaries or it’ll be a bit of a downer.

I would have been content if more of the film had been about the dealings as Frankie was a part of an underground card playing association. The games were definitely high stakes and I love watching card games. That certainly would have kept my interest as those scenes were the best part of the movie. Once again, Frankie made the wrong call and it came back to bite him. That’s really the story of his life and I definitely did not like him.

The villains are naturally unlikable although, the underling of the drug dealer was always fun to watch as he panicked during the card games. Molly was a good supporting character and she was really the reason why Frankie managed to come out of this film in one piece. She was certainly a very helpful character and one you could root for. The plot with the drunk person was a little iffy and maybe Molly should try not to go overboard with the whole being nice thing, but she tries. Frankie also had another friend who helped groom dogs. That guy would support him, but also got Frankie into trouble by bringing him stolen shirts. It was another unfortunate moment for the lead although he should not have accepted since he knew that they were stolen.

The soundtrack was definitely intense and whenever Frankie would go to get a shot, a really quick/ominous theme would play. It was actually quite memorable and that’s more than I can say for most movies so I’ll give the film a lot of props there. It’s not every day that you see such a stellar soundtrack. It’s a shame that the rest of the movie couldn’t have been that good. I was also glad that a dog got to appear for a while and nothing happened to him. Not including animal violence in your film is the first step to success. While this film couldn’t rise above that, it was still nice to see.

There is also some action in the film. Not a whole lot of course, but one guy is slammed to the ground and another one is pushed off of a tall staircase. It was an impressive show of strength for one character although it made the other person look a little iffy. Why would you threaten to shake someone’s life to their core when you’re going to turn your back to that individual while laughing? The villain clearly did not think his plan through at all and certainly regretted that course of action. Then, we have the quick chase scene at the end. You can almost feel the tension in the air as the main characters make the tough calls…almost. It gets quite fatal for at least one individual.

Overall, The Man With The Golden Arm wasn’t a very good film, it was actually a very bad one. Part of the problem is that it just didn’t live up to its name. His Golden Arm allowed Frankie to be great at card games and music, but both of those areas were not explored as well as they should have been. Honestly, the title is a little misleading and I suppose that you could dig up some other meanings behind that like how he always got the drugs in that arm, but it doesn’t eliminate the fact that you may have expected a different movie. I certainly didn’t expect such a large portion of the film to be about his drug problem. It’s good to raise awareness on such things and hopefully get people not to take drugs, but it comes at the expense of how much you can enjoy the film. I just didn’t enjoy this one and the run time felt like forever while watching it. Just think of the movie as being like a bad hotel experience. You arrive with great hopes, only to find that it’s an empty room with nothing to help you pass the time. That’s the essence of the film in a nutshell. If you want a good retro film, then your best bet is to watch the original Astro Boy TV show.

Overall 2/10

The Black Cat Review

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Have you ever seen a film that was very different from what you expected? That happened to me with this film as I just expected a completely different plot and the whole film was as radically different as any I’ve ever seen. Luckily, this was in a good way! As much as a horror film about a Black Cat knocking everyone would have been entertaining, a classic “Who Did It” murder mystery is infinitely better. Aside from one mistake, the film does quite well, but it is unfortunately a big mistake!

An old lady is near death so her family members quickly head to her mansion so that they can pick up their inheritance. If they don’t like what they receive, they are prepared to attack her if necessary. Luckily, they all receive a decent amount of money so they are pleased, but the lady announces that this only comes to pass once her maid is dead as the cats need to be taken care of. One of the family members doesn’t like this and quickly stabs her. With the old lady out of the way, the main characters must figure out who did it as the body count will only rise from here!

One difference in this film compared to the average murder mystery is that the body count isn’t actually that high. The suspense is mostly grabbed by near deaths and the ominous feeling that someone is always watching you. Also, it isn’t played completely serious as it is part comedy. Similar to another murder mystery film that I saw a while back, whose title escapes me. The light tone with the classic mystery make for a winning formula in terms of how interesting the film is.

As this film came out in the very early 1940’s, you can expect that the writing is quite good as well. That makes all the difference in any mystery title and I can almost certainly guarantee that a modern version would not be nearly as good in this area. Whether it be the subtle threats or the not to subtle ones, you just don’t see dialogue like this nowadays. The film is a little on the short side, but there’s still enough time to flesh out the characters and not have a rushed ending.

The film does a good job of making everyone look a little suspicious. There’s the main character who really reminded me of Bill Murray from Ghostbusters and Groundhog Day. Seriously, the guy looks almost identical to him complete with the voice and a similar role. He was definitely one of the best parts of the film and I’d say that he earned the role of best character. As he’s the main character, most of what we see is from his side of the story, but you can never discount the lead as they sometimes don’t tell you everything. I was rooting for him to close the deal though!

The main character’s friend is here to break things to make them more valuable in the future. He’s extremely scatter brained to the point where he can never follow a sentence and it takes him hours to realize what people knew in seconds. He was a fun character as he constantly trolled the rest of the cast and found the secret passages before anyone else. He was in danger many times, but the good part about being oblivious is that fear won’t slow you down! Naturally, he’s suspicious because you have to wonder if it is all truly an act.

Next up, we have the family of three. There’s the step son who threatens his step father several times not to break his mother’s heart as he knows that the guy is cheating with someone else. Considering the threats and how much the money would help him, it’s obvious why this guy is a suspect. Likewise, if the father is willing to cheat on his elderly wife, we don’t know what he is capable of! He definitely wants the money from the will as he constantly yells about it. Maybe he wants it for sinister purposes!

His elderly wife is always in the background and prefers to let everyone else to the talking. She keeps up the pretense of liking the old lady even though everyone else constantly insults her and just waits for her inheritance. Is it possible that she actually cares or is she just playing along to throw away suspicion from herself? There’s the main heroine who believes that no murders took place and that her family are still decent people deep down who wouldn’t cross this line. She tries to distract the main character from this train of thought several times. Is it possible that she is right or does she just want us to think that?

Rounding up the list of suspects are out final members. We have the maid who threatened that the heroes would leave the house one way or the other. Wow, that’s pretty ominous right? A bit obvious, but perhaps that’s the point to lower our guard! There’s also the grounds servant, Eduwardo. He is always listening and watching from outside and he has free reign over the place. He would certainly have the time to commit the acts and the motive as well since he received almost nothing from the will in the end. Finally, we have the old lady. Maybe she cheated death somehow by using a fake poison right?

So, we definitely have a lot of suspects. I’m glad to say that the film doesn’t cheat with the final verdict. The culprit does have a good motive and was one of the suspects so that was good. Cop outs are the one thing that you don’t want in a mystery film! The opening of the film reminded me of a Twilight Zone episode. The mask party one where the relatives all wanted the old man to die and ultimately had their true faces exposed to everyone. The opening was definitely similar and I wouldn’t be surprised if one borrowed from the other.

This film would have been an easy 7, but there was one big mistake, which really hurt it. Unfortunately, one of the cats is poisoned and died. That was a really low blow and it definitely hurt the film. At least the cat wasn’t injured as that would have been even worse, but the death still ensured that I wouldn’t be giving this film any higher than a 5. It’s just hard to recommend a film with animal violence like this at times. For a show that has over 200 episodes or a long series like that, it’s much easier, but a single film….it’s just not happening. This was the one big mistake that the film made, but boy was it a big one!

The romance angle was surprisingly nonexistent for the most part. Of course, we have the main character and heroine who are polite to each other, but it never goes anywhere which is nice and realistic. There’s also the cheating subplot, but it also doesn’t really go anywhere. I’d say that this is a good thing as those plots weren’t needed to make the film be enjoyable anyway. As it stands, most of the character personalities were enjoyable, which really helped the film.

Overall, The Black Cat was much better than I anticipated. The score was lower due to the animal violence, but otherwise it was essentially the ideal mystery. It’s short, but there are no cop outs and the writing as done quite well. The film was pretty funny without going over the top in the comedy aspect. It wasn’t much of a problem back in the day though as the humor was almost always great or you would just miss the joke, but we never saw the kind of jokes that you see in something like Pixels. The horror aspects were also handled well as you would see an ominous hand reach out to take someone down or someone’s frightened expression as they realized that they were doomed. From the classics, this one easily takes down Frankenstein and Dracula without a doubt! In pure entertainment value, this would probably beat all of the other Universal classics.

Overall 5/10

The Son of Kong Review

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It’s time to look at the sequel to good ole King Kong! King Kong is a monster, but I’ve never been a big fan of his films. Mostly due to the trope of him fighting a T Rex and typically destroying him with the jaw attack. Luckily, this would be his son so we may not have needed that. It’s also more of a comedy, which is fairly intriguing. The film’s very short and Kong doesn’t appear for a while so…you may wonder about the pacing.

After the tragedies of the first King Kong film, Carl is out of a job and out of money. Everyone is hitting him with lawsuits so he decides to flee the country and sail the ocean with the captain from the last film. They land on an island where a girl’s father is murdered by a drunk sailor. Carl decides to get both of them on board, but he doesn’t know about the whole murderer angle. He quickly becomes aware of this as he is betrayed by his crew and thrown onto Kong’s island. The girl, sailor, captain, and ship helper are thrown along with him. Can the heroes survive in such a hostile island!?

The film is intriguing as it is very short and not a lot happens. I really hope that the trailer wasn’t all about Kong fighting other monsters as people would have been pretty misled. In a way, it also feels like a total rehash of the first King Kong film, but with his son replacing the famous monster. It’s the kind of sequel that you dream about watching on the big screen, but only if you’re a really huge fan of the franchise. It certainly could have been worse though as it was at least entertaining most of the time.

As this is a retro film, the dialogue is fairly strong. You won’t catch the heroes using a lot of slang or panicking with a potty mouth. All of their lines have a purpose and the characters never lose sight of the objective. They get in some good burns when necessary and Carl is a charismatic main character. The Captain wasn’t bad although I’d keep my guard up a little more if I was him. The traitor had many opportunities to take the Captain down if he really wanted too. The heroine puts on a tough act around the traitor, but she doesn’t seem too sharp on how to handle these matters. She tells the killer to his face that she will tell the cops. There’s no way that he would take that lying down. While her romance is unnecessary, at least she likes animals, which is always a plus. If you’re going to visit an island with magical monsters, being friendly to them is heavily recommended. As for the traitor, he’s made to be unlikable so you don’t have to worry about liking him by mistake. The guy that he took out was also pretty bad, but two wrongs never make a right.

As for the Son of Kong, he has no real character. The movie knows that he is a kid so the Kong is just bored and decides to have fun. He doesn’t do all that much and is just a constant reminder to the heroes that this island is dangerous. Kong gets a few fights of his own with the other monsters in the island. I always like a good Kaiju fight, but it’s actually a kind of fight that must be handled delicately. See, I love the scuffling with the monsters, but I don’t like it when the monsters actually get hurt. Mild injuries are okay depending on the circumstances, but getting lethally bitten or starting to bleed is a big no no.

It’s why I didn’t enjoy the Mecha Godzilla fight against Anguirus while I loved the Anguirus vs Godzilla fight in Raid Again. The rolling and wrestling between the monsters is the good part. Shooting lasers is also a lot of fun as the towns are obliterated. Son of Kong is too realistic for that so we have Kong trying to crush his opponents and the fights actually aren’t that fun. It’s too bad, but Kong just goes for the KO mouth grab too much. It will remind you of the Captain Falcon flow chart over on For Glory as everyone goes in for the dash grab. You never want to mess with a character like that and likewise, you need to be wary of the fights.

I don’t think that the King Kong franchise will ever be quite as good as the Godzilla one, but it is still ahead of the various Ape films. As long as it holds on here, that should be all right. The future King Kong films certainly don’t sound great, but perhaps it will surprise me. This film really wasn’t that bad and likewise, the first one had potential. Son of Kong just needed to improve on some areas and it could have gotten a positive score.

Had the film been longer, I wouldn’t have minded some more footage in the city from the beginning of the movie. Getting hounded by all of the lawsuits could have been a very entertaining plot to follow. Nothing beats being in the big city after all and even in the past, you could tell that the reporters were always ready. There was some plot hax with none of them recognizing Carl with his quick disguise on, but I suppose that they forgot their glasses.

The inhabitants of King Kong’s island make a cameo towards the beginning as they prevent the heroes from landing ashore, but they evidently don’t watch all sides of the island as the characters just go in through the back entrance and never see the citizens again. Those guys really are not good as protecting their island even if the heroes do end up beyond the sacred gate.

Overall, Son of Kong isn’t that bad although it’s not quite good enough for me to call it a good film. It was fun for most of the film, but the Kong plot isn’t very interesting and that’s the main plot. Carl never got to take on the traitor, which was too bad. The fight scenes weren’t very good and the film was very short, yet it didn’t feel that quick. If you liked the first King Kong film a lot, then you should go for this one. You should enjoy it about as much as the former as they share many similarities. If you didn’t like the first film or didn’t even watch it, then I recommend passing on this one as soon as possible. It’s simply not the kind of film that will make you eager to check out any future Kong titles.

Overall 4/10

And Then There Were None Review

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It’s time to look at a really retro film. This title came out almost 10 years before the original Godzilla, which shows that it has certainly seen a long film history. You’ll be reminded of Clue almost instantly as the film begins. Little did I realize that this one would even beat Clue (Granted that it’s been a while since I saw that film) and this could be one of the best mystery thrillers that I’ve ever seen! It certainly surpassed my expectations.

The film opens with quite a few different characters entering a mysterious house. They have all been called here under various pretenses, but then they start to figure out that something is a wrong. A voice emanates from the shadows and accuses them all of various crimes involving murder. They were never brought to justice for their past deeds so the host has decided that it is his job to prosecute the characters. Can the 10 criminals trust each other long enough to come up with a plan or are they simply going to die until the title of the film rings true!?

The premise is a good one although it can be difficult to execute it properly. If this film had come out 50 years later, I’m sure that the director would have made this more of a modern slasher film where everyone dies in the diciest ways possible. Luckily, this was the 40’s. Back when everyone had constraint and the film is actually very tame considering the fact that the body count is quite high. All of the violence is off screen and their fates were all rather simple and direct. The film knew that the best way to go about this was to be direct and to the point. It worked like a charm!

As I always say, one of the best things about mystery films is trying to figure out who the culprit is. Likewise, the best thing in a slasher film is trying to figure out who’s going to live if you think that anyone will survive the experience. Needless to say, I tried to do both here. I was right about the character who lived through this, but I was wrong about who the culprit was. Ah well, 1/2 isn’t all that bad when you think about it. No worries, there are no cop outs here although one scene will have you questioning it quite a bit. I find it a little hard to believe personally. The crossed out section quickly mentions the scene and while I tried to make it spoiler free, you should still skip that paragraph until you watch the film. Since this is a mystery film, such potential spoilers are more important to mention than usual.

The scene in question involves a possible injury. It’s hard to elaborate on that without spoiling the film, but do you think you could tell if someone was shot or not if you had a clear view of the supposed bullet hole? It’s safe to say that you would be able to discern such a thing with ease. It’s actually tougher on the viewer than the character because you could just assume that the special effects were not up to snuff so it is hard to tell if the character is injured or not. It is a valid excuse for a movie watcher, but not for the characters inside of the film. There is no way that they would not be able to tell the difference.

That was just a small critique though. The film probably couldn’t think of a better way to go about this so that was still a mostly acceptable way of handling it. Trust me, it could have been much less believable! The atmosphere is very cloudy and mysterious, which suits the film. It is definitely a title that would be much different if it had been in color. I’m hesitant to say that any film is better in black and white, but it certainly worked for me here. For a mystery, black and white just seems to make sense.

Naturally, the most important factor for this film was going to be the cast of characters. You need a likable bunch or else you’re going to start rooting for the villain. After all, two wrongs don’t make a right, but the heroes have gotten away with murder…haven’t they? the ending does a good job of stopping this actually as the ending addresses everything, which makes the film happier than it might have been otherwise. Let’s just say that the crooks don’t necessarily get away with anything, but things are more complicated than they appear on the surface.

Of course, it’s also the kind of film where you don’t tend to remember any of the names after watching it. You will be able to recall how the characters looked and acted, but the names simply weren’t unique enough to recall. That’s all right though since the characters are the important part. The team is made up of 10 fugitives and then we’ve got the butler and his assistant. I’ll try to quickly give you a rundown of them so you can decide who is shady and who isn’t.

The butler is…the butler. What else can you say about this guy and why you should suspect him? He serves the food and knows the mansion better than the rest of the characters. The assistant doesn’t seem to like any of the other characters and she wants to get away from the mansion as soon as possible. Maybe she has a strong motive eh? We have the main character who seems like a really nice lady who is oblivious to the danger at first. Surely such a nice soul could not be the mastermind…right? An older lady is also present who loves knitting. She loves to voice aloud her agreement with Mr. Owens (The boss behind the shadows) in the fact that the fugitives (Minus herself) need to be punished with death. Maybe she is simply giving them a hint! There’s a crazy guy who loves singing and making the atmosphere morbid. He definitely seems suspect! There’s a judge of sorts who seems to be brilliant. He’s constantly making deductions and he is always able to make an airtight case against whoever is allegedly guilty at the moment. Maybe he’s turning the team against each other? A doctor is also in the house and he likes beer although he doesn’t admit to it. Is he trying to forget his wicked deeds before destroying the rest of the cast? You certainly can’t trust anyone who’s not being honest with the cast. We also can’t forget the guy who is always agreeing with the Judge. He is easily swayed by opinions and he’ll follow whoever seems to have the best idea. Perhaps he is saving his cunning mind for when he will truly need it! Finally, we’ve got the generic American, action hero. This guy’s cool, calm, and collected. He’s also armed with an illegal handgun that he is pretending to not possess. Hmmm….nothing shady about that eh? I believe that I named all of the main characters or at least I hope I did. If I left anyone out, it was just accidental misdirection…..

As I mentioned earlier, the ending is fairly satisfying with a little humor involved as well. For some context, my favorite character was the driver of the ship who was taking the 10 convicts to the private island. He was having fun with his sandwich and he certainly knew the score. Unlike the main characters who were fighting for their lives, the captain was just sleeping at home! He makes it back to the island for the ending and it is safe to say that he handled the situation quite well. The film ends there, but I have no doubt that he will be ready to take the win.

There are two elements to the plot that I did not mention earlier so I should quickly elaborate on them. For starters, the heroes cannot leave the island because the boat only comes on Mondays. Or, the next boat is on Monday. Either way, they have to survive 3 nights if they want to stay alive. Moreover, every character is dying according to a creepy poem that is in the house. The villain wants to stick to the script so that should at least give the heroes a heads up on what’s about to happen to them…if they heed the poem of course!

Overall, The film’s title allows you to quickly get yourself interested in what’s about to happen and the film executes the plot to perfection. There is little room for improvement here as the film really does a good job on all areas. The characters are interesting and the pacing is nice and quick. The ending is solid and the film was a slasher while still staying true to the mystery element. There are few films that I would recommend sooner from the 40’s than this one…if any. I highly recommend checking this film out and if you love a good mystery, it is safe to say that you will greatly enjoy this one!

Overall 8/10

Airport Review

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It’s time to look at an older film this time. Airport involves a pretty large cast as they all come together on what could be their most dangerous adventure yet. There are a lot of plots to be found in this film and they all collide for the climax. It’s a fun yet tricky formula and the writing is really key in something like this. I’d say that Airport succeeds even if some of the plots may have been a little unnecessary. I do love a good airplane film!

Of course, due to the nature of the film, it can be a little hard to describe the plot. Needless to say, it has been a very cold winter and a lot of snow has hit the ground. Airplanes are having a tough time trying to get off the ground and there is no room for the ones that are still in the sky. The bigshots want to close it down for a few days, but that would leave some planes stranded. Making matters worse is that an old lady keeps escaping the authorities and escaping onto the planes while an enraged bomber is also preparing for his big move. Throw in a few dramas and guys who are cheating and have divided loyalties…and you’ve got yourself a film!

It’s hard to say that the film has a central plot, but it all leads up to the big airplane ride. That’s where all of the action is of course. When the heroes make their big move on the bomber, it’s fun to see how it all plays out. Let’s just say that you will be impressed by the heroicness of the passengers, but it will also happen to be a bad thing here. “Right place, but wrong time” basically sums it up. It’s still nice to see the passengers defend the defenseless here when push comes to shove. I do have to admit that there may have been some slight plot hax here though. The bomb should have done a lot more damage to the plane unless it was an extremely tiny one. I just don’t buy it.

A negative for the film would be the fact that some of the characters look very similar. None of the names are really that memorable so you really just have to figure out who the character is based on his dialogue or where he is. The guys that I typically mixed up were the pilot and the GM in charge of the company. Luckily, one of them always wore a red tie, which seriously came in handy. Otherwise, I definitely would have been in trouble.

Unfortunately, it’s hard to root for some of the characters. One of the main characters is cheating on his wife and actually gets someone else pregnant. He’s definitely a bad character right from that moment on and before that as well. Once we knew that he was cheating, we knew that this was a character who shouldn’t be trusted or liked. The lady is also to blame of course as she knew that he was married. Still, we don’t just get that plot once, but twice as another couple is having issues. They agree to divorce, but the lady was already seeing someone else and the guy also had his attention diverted. The director must have loved this kind of situation to include it twice, but one of them should have been cut out or tweaked a little bit. We don’t really need that drama here.

Luckily, we had a more entertaining plot at the ready with an old lady. She has been sneaking onto flights for a long time now and she knows just how to handle the situation. Of course, it’s a bit of a stretch that her techniques worked so often, but that’s all right since it was a fun plot. One worker really tried to keep tabs on her, but he was just too nice/gullible for his own good. The old lady tries to help during the climax, but it is of no avail. It’s too bad since she could have helped and really redeemed herself with the staff on that point, but it wasn’t too be.

The film is over two hours, but I can safely say that it never drags on. There’s always something happening and it’s easy to catch your attention. I liked seeing the snow since it really poured over here this year and watching the one shot characters shoot off ideas was fun as well. One of the main characters really knew his stuff and always made sure to shoot them down. Shoveling like that back in the day was probably a lot of work, but it can still be pretty sad to see the workers hiding in the van and shirking their duty. Some things never change eh? The mechanic actually ended up being one of my favorite characters as he showed that putting the plane at full power wouldn’t bust it apart. He did help to build it after all so he should know it much better than any pilot. It would have been very humiliating if the plane had buckled.

The whole bomb subplot will also make you feel even better about the metal detectors that they have at airports nowadays. There’s no way someone could just walk in with a black suitcase, no questions asked nowadays. Seriously, I’m surprised that there weren’t more incidents like this back in the day if it was this easy to get into an airplane. If anything, I’m sure that this film incentivized the officials in the real world to make sure that nobody could try out these tricks.

Overall, Airport is a pretty enjoyable film. I can’t stress enough how important the writing is here since that is the difference between this being a 7 or a 4. (Or maybe lower) In this kind of film, you need the writing to be funny and engaging or else all of the different plots will just start to blend together and you’ll become bored. There isn’t a lot of danger or action here so you have to start to like or dislike the characters in order to continue without a problem. Some of the plots certainly could have been taken out, but at least they are handled with dignity. This is really how a film should be. No language, questionable romance, animal violence, etc. It’s why I liked the retro days for films so much. They simply don’t make them like it used too. I definitely recommend this film for anyone who wants a charming film to watch one evening. It’s a good way to relax and it will remind you to travel via airplane sometime in the near future.

Overall 7/10

The Bad Seed Review

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Well, it’s time to look at a really old film that couldn’t manage to be that good. It’s an uncommon occurrence, but we have seen it occur as with the Picture of Dorian Grey. This film is much worse than that one and we’re talking 2001 levels of wince worthiness. The concept doomed the film from the start so there’s not much that it could have done, but it still managed to underwhelm.

Christine’s life seems to be just about perfect. Her husband is a hard working member of the army and her daughter is extremely polite. Mix that in with her nice neighbors and she really couldn’t hope for better. Unfortunately, her life begins to unravel once she finds out that her daughter is not quite as nice as she appears. No, she is actually pretty bad and now she must decide what to do with Rhoda. Will she even be able to do something about this situation?

Well, I’ve got to start somewhere so let’s just look at one of the film’s big problems from the get go. That’s the plot. For horror films, I prefer (in this order) the villain to be a Kaiju>>>Monster>>>Alien>>Super Powered Thug>>>Random guy>>>Friend>>>Family Member>>>Main Character. I never like it when the big villain actually turns out to be a family member or the main character. “The main character is the villain” twist almost never works and it makes it hard to root for anyone. I also don’t care for the friend ultimately becoming the big villain either in this kind of film although it can work out depending on how it’s handled. In a more comic bookey film like the Avengers, it works out beautifully, but imagining that subplot in an old film like this one…well it wouldn’t work.

It’s naturally used because a twist like this can really be milked for emotional value and you know that the characters will have a tough time taking Rhoda to the authorities despite the fact that she is a murderer. Well, it may cause some drama for the characters, but as a film plot, it’s more annoying than anything else. The heroes know what they should do and watching them not do it can be sad. By “them” I’m really talking about Christine.

The Bad Seed also drags on a lot. It may only be a little over 2 hours, but it’ll feel like 3 by the time that it is done. I was 1 hour into the film and I thought that we were at the ending because it had been so long. Little did I know that we weren’t quite done yet. It helps that we all know how mean Rhoda is, but the characters refuse to believe it for a while. So, you can only watch a villain trick the heroes with a cutesy act for so long before you begin to get bored.

The film did opt for a different ending than the book and both have their demerits so it’s tough to say which is better. Naturally, I can’t even go too much into this area for spoiler reasons, but the best ending would have been to send Rhoda to jail. This doesn’t get to happen, but I’m happy that the aunt got to survive. She was definitely one of the better characters in the film and she really meant well. She even has a Lovebird so you can tell that she’s a respectable person. The film doesn’t resort to animal violence so I’ll give the film some props there.

The film has one character named Leroy who doesn’t add anything to the movie. He is just here to the audience has another unlikable character to root against. I suspect that this is supposed to make you want to take Rhoda’s side despite what she has done. They simply didn’t need to add this guy and at least his wisecrack about someone being lonely doesn’t go anywhere. I was expecting it too and for Rhoda to destroy him, proving that her skills can be used for good. That doesn’t happen though and we’re left with a bad character.

Rhoda is definitely not good as well. Her reasons for destroying people boil down to one thing. She simply wants whatever she can’t have and she’ll destroy anyone to get it. She destroys a kid, an old lady, and an adult so she covers all of the bases. Naturally, this doomed her as a character from the start and we have more cases of civilian deaths, which aren’t cool. Destroying characters who can’t fight back is always pretty distasteful and it was yet another nail in the coffin for this movie. It’s also a stretch that the kid made it to the raft and the lifeguard didn’t notice, but Rhoda tends to plan for everything.

Christine also deserves some of the blame since she tries to cover this up rather than going to the proper authorities like she should have. That was a critical mistake on her part and it’s something that she should have tried a little harder to avoid. Instead of doing that, she just decides to cross the line and it’s not a great move. I also have to question the ending because it means that the shot must not have hit something critical. I don’t see how you can miss at such close range.

The film has an interesting tale about bad seeds and the theory where you can inherit being evil through your genes as opposed to the environment shaping you. It’s the Nature vs Nurture argument that people like to discuss and it’s naturally a bit of a mix. I’m more on the Nature side as in the soul, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the genes. You can inherit someone’s looks and probably a bit of their character as well, but the choices between good and evil are ultimately your own. Nobody’s destined to be a great person or to be a bad one. That’s simply something that you decide from the get go. The film suggests otherwise and I definitely disagree there. Rhoda became a bad person on her own and it ultimately came back to bite her.

Still, if the whole film had just been a discussion between the professionals, that could have been entertaining. Listening to theories and such is always pretty enjoyable and it may not be for everyone, but 2 hours of that could actually be amusing so long as they don’t begin to run in circles. I suppose that just about everything would have been an improvement for this film though. It didn’t even have a soundtrack to protect us from the events. Had the villain been the neighbor’s daughter and she was attacking the heroes, that could have been more amusing. They’d still need to cut out her attack on the old lady and the kid, but it could have worked. “Could” being the key word of course.

Overall, The Bad Seed is a film that I highly suggest skipping. It’s really just a tragedy film where you watch the main characters cry and experience more sad events as the movie goes on. We naturally get to see the victim’s mom appear and we find out that the experience basically broke her. She is now a drunk and then Christine basically breaks by the end. If I want to see something breaking, I’ll look at a documentary of Super Smash Bros Brawl’s reputation! Tragedies are like Horrors in the fact that neither one of them tends to be very good. If you want a film with some sad scenes that is still great, check out Yugioh Bonds Beyond Time. We do get an emotional death and things tend to get very intense very quickly, but it balances that out with good plot progression and some action. Just watching the sad scenes over and over again does not make a film and that’s where The Bad Seed went wrong.

Overall 1/10

The Blob Review

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It’s time for another retro horror film in The Blob! The Blob never really sounded very intriguing since it doesn’t seem like it can be an engaging villain. On the other hand, this guarantees that the film won’t be the slasher kind and the heroes will have to use their wits to escape this ordeal. It was a little better than I had expected and you shouldn’t underestimate The Blob!

A meteor crash lands in an abandoned area one day and an old farmer notices this. He stabs the egg with his stick, but The Blob adapts as quickly as it evolves and it grabs him. The man bumps into the main characters, Steve and Jane. They take him to a doctor, but things take a turn for the worst when the Doctor is murdered. Who would do such a thing? Unless….it was The Blob! The heroes can’t afford to let their guard down as time is not on their side anymore.

The set up is pretty good since the Blob has to infiltrate the town somehow. From there, it’s up to the writers to really make The Blob a threat. It’s pretty fun to see him go after the heroes since he…or it can’t move very quickly. One character makes the mistake of tripping into The Blob though and the other one runs for the window despite The Blob being near it. These fellows probably didn’t watch a whole lot of horror films and now they’ll never get the chance!

The actual Blob is pretty formidable since bullets don’t even faze it. It also absorbs the mysterious elements that are thrown at it in the lab and endures the raw power of lightning. Let’s face it, this guy has Kaiju levels of durability! For all we know, it’s still out there….lurking….and prepping for the fights to come. I think it’ll be pretty hard to find someone who says that they actually like the Blob a lot as a character, but it’s an interesting villain.

The main problem is the lack of speed on the Blob’s part. While it may be funny to see characters trip and get absorbed, it’s not something that you will find believable. It should be simplicity itself to avoid the Blob. Even the very beginning was dicey since the farmer’s reaction times were very slow. I’d like to see the Blob take on Nemo from the animated film. The unstoppable force meets the invincible fish. It would be a fight for the ages. That being said, the Blob may sort of be alive…but maybe it isn’t. It continues to grow and it absorbs everything, but it could be like a plant that moves to face the sun. More reactions than actual thoughts. I don’t really consider it to be alive in the literal sense…or should I say figurative sense? It’s about as alive as a plant.

The film did manage to scare me in one scene. A dog decides to tag along with the heroes to avenge his owner, but then the Blob steps in. I was on the edge of my seat poised to deduct some massive points from the film, but the dog manages to escape. Never before have I been so epicly ready to give back the points. Most horror films would have taken the low route and allowed the dog to be eaten. Not The Blob! It’s one of the reasons why this film was actually pretty decent.

The writing is pretty good and it’s why I still like these old films a lot. The cops were all pretty likable and even the “bullies” were good by the end. I’m not a fan of either of the main characters though. It’s not the writing’s fault of course, they were just very unlikable. I’ll explain why!

Jane drops the dog…twice. That’s inexcusable and I knew that I wasn’t going to like her at that point. I was already pretty wary since she fell into the romance plot with Steve, but this was the extra push that really sunk her character. It was pretty unnecessary and just sad. Steve isn’t much better since he has a lot of cheesy lines to try and convince Jane that he’s on the up and up. He shrugs her off once when he gets distressed about the Blob. He overreacts a lot and he conversation with the policeman at the very beginning was pretty wince worthy. His excuses needed excuses and he didn’t even get to win the street race. He wasn’t really much of a hero by the end and he was just thrown into the circumstances. He nearly convinced himself that it was all fake as well.

The bullies from the beginning actually turn out to just be friends who were having a little fun with the main character. It’s a good thing that this is the case for Steve since he probably couldn’t have held his own in a fight. They heavily outnumber him and they seem to be a little tougher. They help the main characters out a lot by helping them search and waking up the town. Without these kids, Steve probably would have been sunk.

There are three main policemen and they are pretty neat. We have the strict guy who has a big sob story on the left and the reasonable joe on the right. The third guy likes to play chess, but that’s about it. The strict one is pretty intense and you can tell that he has a lot of experience and I have to say that most of his tips were pretty sound. (Keep the kids in the cell sir!) The veteran actually likes kids so he’s a lot more reasonable, but the heroes don’t give him a whole lot to work with. It’s tough for the cops since the heroes are always messing around with the rules.

I guess a minor criticism for the film could be that everyone adapts a little too quickly to the monster. The cops almost immediately stop trying to shoot it because they find out that it’s impervious to all conventional weaponry. It’s true that nothing (Possibly including nukes) can hurt the Blob, but I’d expect them to try a little more. It’s good that they can give the Blob the chills through natural methods, but that was really just a lucky guess. We expect the police to fight for us until the last man! It’s still a pretty small thing though and the romance/main characters is the only true negative of the film.

Overall, The Blob is a pretty fun creature feature film. The main characters are very below average though and I prefer the leads from most of the other films of this era. These guys weren’t polite to the animals and they just weren’t interesting. I much prefer the other kids since they stay up to watch the creature feature films as well and they have a solid sense of justice. They couldn’t just walk away when the going got tough! The Blob may not have a roar or a real design, but it deals some damage and it made for a unique villain. I definitely recommend this film to anyone who likes a good monster film or a survival story. It’s just the kids against the big Blob that continues to grow. Who knows how powerful he’ll be in the sequel! The film didn’t really have much in the way of negatives, but I still refrained from giving it a higher score due to the fact that it would simply need more action or a better lead to vault it into the Super Six level. A different pair of main characters probably would have been all that it would need to get to the next level.

Overall 5/10