Hide and Seek Review

Posted on September 29, 2014 by dreager1

Please note that this review is of the edited TV 14 version of the film. All of the writing below should only be addressed to this particular version as the uncut one would likely get an even lower score or the review would just be more negative.

It’s really no stretch to say that horror films are my least favorite genre. Even romance or comedy films tend to have more heart to them. Of course, there are likely some genres that could go under horror if we really went drastic. (Infinite categories out there. Kaiju films, Space Kaiju Films, Undergeround Kaiju films, etc.) War Documentaries would be pretty close to horror films, but I barely count documentaries as films as it is. A regular War film would still be applicable though and we can’t forget about Zombie films. (Even though they would likely count as horror) I can safely say that this film was even worse than the average horror and it goes to Sucker Punch levels of bad. Can you say a 1 for effort? Let’s see what it did wrong.

First, we need to try to remember the plot that all horror films have. A guy and his daughter decide to move to an abandoned area on the outskirts of New York after the mother dies. Unfortunately, strange things begin to happen. Is the House haunted? Is the Dad crazy? Is the Daughter Possessed? Are there Demons hanging around? Zombies? Ghosts? Plot Holes? Take your pick and then get ready to cringe through the background plot as you await the chills and thrills. The body count is pretty low for most of the film, but the ending decides to quickly change this as the film becomes your average slasher. I definitely got some “I know what you did Last Summer” vibes from the ending since it’s fairly similar. (Then again…I could say that about most horror films!) The main characters are certainly in trouble so this could get deadly.

Well, the cast is pretty small in this film. That’s probably a good thing since most of the characters would have been pretty bad anyway. The main character is Mr. Callaway. I dare say that he’s slightly worse than the average lead for a horror film and that’s saying something. He’s pretty unstable and you don’t know what to expect from him. One second he’s a professional on the mind so he can out psych the daughter through her issues and the next second he’s panicking and running away from her. He needs some more training to say the least. Once the murders begin, he decides to cover them up instead of reporting it to the proper authorities and he’s definitely outmatched against Charlie. There aren’t any likable qualities to Mr. Callaway, but he’s not the only terrible character.

Did I mention that Charlie gets a big role in the film. He’s just as unlikable as Mr. Callaway. He likes to play games and it’s heavily implied that he has super speed or invisibility. He probably has dozens of other powers since horror films like to make their villains unstoppable right? Well, Charlie definitely doesn’t have what it takes to be a cool villain. His character design is pretty awful and he’s also fairly weak so he has to rely on tricks and surprise attacks to win his fights. He certainly didn’t help the film.

Emily is the daughter and she doesn’t help the film. She spends most of it being pretty distant and refusing to talk until she meets Charlie. She did just go through a pretty traumatic accident so we can sympathize with her, but it still doesn’t make her an enjoyable character to see on screen. She’s typically a downer. We find out that Emily does try to help out at certain points and she does well during the ending, but she’s still not what I’d call a very good character. She did have some opportunities to quickly end things although I’m sure that it could have backfired since most of the other characters are slow on the uptake.

We have the Sheriff who looks pretty terrible throughout the film. He wanders into the house during the climax and he knows that there has already been a murder. (More than one, but he only knows about one) So, he goes into the room and the lights turn off. He panics and runs towards the basement…that doesn’t end well. Should I mention that he never even reaches for his gun? This guy must be super confident to be walking into closets and constantly giving his back to every direction.

Catherine is another major in psychology and she proves to be more proficient at it than the main character. She doesn’t get a huge role, but this is a slasher so she does make sure to grab a gun and get involved in the climax. She looks downright terrible during most of it, but she finally gets to land a good hit in the end. She’s easily the best character in the film and it’s too bad that she couldn’t have gotten involved sooner. At least we had one pretty good character right?

We also had some supporting characters that had no point in the film except to be red herrings. So that I don’t spoil which one is the red herring, I shall quickly name 4 side characters. Apologies if it’s obvious who the red herring is, but this isn’t exactly Inception! We have the neighbors Laura and her husband. Laura’s a little overly friendly and she constantly goes to the house while her husband hangs around outside and meets up with the daughter. There’s also another acquaintance who has a daughter and they decide to visit the house as well. It should be noted that both neighbors as well as the mother look pretty much identical and I was wondering if they decided to save the budget by having one actress portray all three. Let’s face it, this film didn’t get a big budget!

Well, that’s basically the cast. If this doesn’t sound like a 1 star film yet, then you have not seen Man of Steel! (Man of Steel’s awesomeness in comparison should show you that this is basically a one star film) One of the numerous negatives in this film is the classic animal violence. Every horror film has it so this one quickly includes it as well. Let’s just say that it’s a cat this time and it’s as sad as you may have expected.

This is a slasher so you can expect a lot of gratuitous violence as well. We get the blood bath tub that seems to be featured prominently in all of the 18 and up slashers. It’s really their calling card I suppose. Other people get slashed and we even have doll violence where the dolls are so grotesquely broken that you have to wonder if it’s even possible. One of the characters really crushes one of them in the span of a few seconds. Sort of like Attack on Titan, this film helps to show us that too much violence can just water down the story.

This next negative is probably a given, but the film is also a downer. There’s a happy ending at the end of course, but it only gets about a minute of screentime while the other events take up the rest of the film. You would have more fun watching the Broncos get blown out of the Super Bowl again and I have to say that the game was pretty painful. (I was rooting for the Broncos) There aren’t any scenes that will make you cheer or even any that will make you smile at all. The whole film is devoid of enjoyment or entertainment.

The final plot twist is pretty generic and not in a good way. Of course, I would have said that the twist was generic if it had ended up being one of the other twists that I had labeled in the beginning. All of those are just stale at this point so none of them are surprising. As expected, the film chose the worst one of the group since that is just continuing with the film’s history of bad choices. The only twist that could have been worse would have been if the red herring was the actual villain because of the plot holes and the idea of such a threat. Nonetheless, this is still a pretty awful second and it didn’t do the film any favors. I should also mention that the film tries to be deep and complex by having a subplot filled with flashbacks and a mysterious waking at 2:06 every morning, but that won’t stop you from snoozing throughout the film and checking your watch.

“Hey, you forgot the positives!” Actually..this film had no positives. It’s one of those films that doesn’t even need to exist. It just takes all the worst tropes of your average horror film and throws them together. On that note, you could say that the film is even worse than Sucker Punch since the other film at least had action scenes, but the worst scenes in Sucker Punch are probably worse than the worst ones here so it’s a dicey showdown. Either way, this is a film that you really just want to see panned by critics and smashed at the Box Office.

Overall, Hide and Seek is as bad as the title would suggest. You’d have a much better time playing Hide and Seek in a one room apartment during the afternoon. I usually give a quick recap of the positives and negatives in this paragraph, but the whole review is basically made up of the negatives so you probably still remember them. This goes without saying, but I strongly recommend staying away from this film. (and horrors/slashers in general) If you want a classy film that’s still pretty scary, I would recommend the 4th Bleach film or even playing a level in Luigi’s Mansion. In the meantime, you’ll be spared from watching this film. Thus, saving you at least 100 minutes of your life that you can use towards racking up trophies on your PS3.

Overall 1/10

Key Largo Review

Posted on September 29, 2014 by dreager1

Bogart and Bacall get to team up once again, but this is easily their weakest adventure. I had a feeling that something wasn’t right when I noticed that the name, Robinson, was between Bogart and Bacall. That’s not how it’s supposed to go right? This is definitely a classic 40s film and it’s still 6 years before the first Godzilla film, but something went dreadfully wrong. The film just moved away from some of the things that made the first few films so good.

Frank decides to pay his army friend’s father a visit as he travels down to the Key Largo section. The hotel is apparently closed, but the father seems happy to see him and Frank gets to meet his pal’s wife. They talk about the friend and what a good guy he was before he finally died in the war. There are a few shady characters in the hotel, but everything else seems to be all right. Some Indians are also around and they plan to turn themselves in for the good of everyone. They leave and prepare to do so later. That’s when the shady fellows decide to make their move and they take the hotel. Everyone has become their hostages now and they’ll all have to weather the hurricane together. There is a lot of tension in the air!

Well, this film definitely didn’t do it for me. For one thing, Bogart typically plays a hardcore lead who loves to mess with everyone. That’s not Frank in this one. Frank is still heroic and he’s a tough guy, but he doesn’t really talk back to the villains. He’s more of a subdued character who is tired of fighting and he’s ready to call it a day. He does make a lot of good moves like not falling for the empty gun trick, but he’s not as exciting as you might expect. Now, I’m not saying that Frank’s a bad character. He’s still a good lead and I agree with most of his moves. He doesn’t even get distracted by romance this time. He’s just not very exciting and he would make for a better supporting character if anything.

Nora is the main heroine and she’s the kind of character that a modern film could portray a little better. (Which is pretty rare) She tries to be tough when needed, but she just doesn’t look very good. She attacks the villain on two occasions, but she’s completely overpowered without doing any real damage. She’s a good character, but not one that is very enjoyable to see on screen since you know that she’ll just be defeated. I can’t say that this is Bacall’s best character to portray either. Nora just needed to get some sort of weapon to make things a little more interesting.

Johnny Rocco is the main villain and he’s about as unlikable as you would expect. He’s always chewing on a cigar or taking a bath. He’s not very bright and Frank makes fun of him from time to time. The only reason why he lasts so long is because he has a gun at the ready. There’s not much else to say about him. He’s just your average gangster who has a lot of minions who could technically beat him in a fight, but are afraid to do so. He’s easily the worst character in the film.

He’s got a handful of minions. One of them tends to laugh a lot while the other one likes to talk or grab a drink to ease the tension. A lady is along with the gang and she’s completely hooked on beer. She seems a little out of place with the group since she used to be a singer and everything, but she went down the wrong path. We’ve also got the Indians whose bond with the father is broken thanks to these circumstances. The cops don’t look too great as one of them is really slow on the uptake while the other one was quickly blindsided. The father of the dead friend really tries his best to keep on believing that the villains will be defeated, but he’s in a wheelchair so he’s not really in a position to fight. He does try though and it can be pretty sad to watch. It’s too bad for the guy since he had a pretty peaceful life up until that point.

One of the big things that hurt the film was that it’s just not very fun. We don’t get any of the witty banter that we have gotten used too in the other titles. Sure, Frank messes with the villain a little, but it can barely be called banter since it’s completely one sided. None of the characters are as charismatic as their older counterparts either. It’s a film where you are actually going to check your watch to see if it’s almost over.

The villains also get away with too much as you may have expected. The cops may be on the way, but it’s a little too late since one of the characters is already taken out and the hotel is basically ruined. Frank gets his big fight at the end and it’s good that he finally went on the offensive, but it definitely took a while. The main heroine’s attack that backfired is also another reason why the film was pretty doomed. It’s just another unnecessary scene to show off how “tough” the villain is. He’s pretty fat and he doesn’t work out so I don’t think he’ll be too strong. At the very least, it should be more of a fight. The Indians also get the short end of the stick here since their end isn’t very happy either.

There isn’t much of a soundtrack here. They squeeze in a song as per usual, but I can’t say that it was anything great. To be fair, I don’t think films really got good music until the 80s, although there are likely a few exceptions scattered about. There isn’t much scenery to look at either since most of the film takes place in the hotel. Not a lot of variety.

Overall, Key Largo lost the charm that the other team up films had. This one just isn’t fun to watch. We don’t have the epic banter and no fight scenes until the very end. The cast is also filled with mostly unlikable or bland characters. There’s no real romance this time, but the film was pretty sunk without it. If you’re looking for a classic (Pre Godzilla) film to watch, then I would recommend The Big Sleep instead. That one is a good example of how you should make a classic film. At least there wasn’t any animal violence here!

Overall 4/10

Dark Passage Review

Posted on September 23, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time for the next installment in the Bogart and Bacall series. This film is still a mystery, but it’s not as much of a focus as it was in the last film. The plot involves the mystery of course, but it’s also a thriller as the hero has to stay low to make sure that the cops don’t find him. It’s another solid film from the 40’s and it holds up pretty well. There is one aspect of it that I can’t say that I’m crazy about and it involves the camera angles. Beyond that, it looks like we’ve picked another winner!

The plot involves Vincent, an escaped convict. He has been charged with murdering his wife and he was going to be locked up for a very long time..unless he goes to the gas chamber. None of those options appeal to Vincent so he somehow manages to break out of jail and jump onto a prison transport while riding in a barrel. He rolls his way into a lake and knocks out a driver who was passing by. Things are still pretty dangerous for him when a mysterious lady tells him to get into her car as she takes him home. How many hidden agendas does this lady have and is Vincent really safe here? Things are going to get tough for Vincent and we aren’t even sure if we should root for him. After all…what if the charges are true!?

Vincent is not quite as interesting as the last two leads that we had for the 40’s films. He’s not quite as bold or confident. He’s not timid, but he’s not quick to insult everyone and make a lot of witty comebacks. He does go into rage mode once his friend is taken out of the picture (He denies this of course) and he’s a decent fighter. Still, Vincent could have handled the situation better if he didn’t keep making unnecessary errors. “Why did you want the Sports section Vince” “I wanted to see how the Miami horses were doing” “Those finished months ago….GET HIM!” is basically how one scene goes down. At least choose something like Baseball where you can be sure that it’s still active. He claims to have played it so he should know if it’s in the off season or not. Something easy like Baseball would have really helped him when he was in a tough spot.

Irene is a character that did trick me so I will give props there. I was waiting for her to betray Vincent or to unleash her master plan. I kept waiting and waiting until the credits started rolling. She’s all right I suppose, but her strategy is definitely more than a little risky. There was still the chance that Vincent was a murderer. (Although Irene did have some decent evidence that suggested otherwise) She’s not a fighter and she doesn’t have a gun so she doesn’t get to help that much in the climax, but she certainly helps Vincent a lot when he’s in a pinch.

Madge is the lady next door who is worried about Vincent’s possible arrival into the state. She believes that Vincent will come after her and it’s a very delicate situation. They certainly don’t get along, but it seems like nobody really gets along with her. There’s not much to say about Madge here since she’s deeply entangled into the plot, but I can’t say that she’s a great character.

Sam is pretty good since he sees through Vincent’s facade without any effort. This is definitely a guy who could be a detective and the veiled threats start to get pretty intense until you realize that he has a master plan in all of this. I’d definitely say that he’s one of the better characters in the film. He doesn’t get a whole lot of screentime, but he was certainly memorable.

We had some side characters as well, but they didn’t do a whole lot. The plastic surgeon is there to help. He makes a joke about how he could wreck Vincent’s life, but at least he was just joking. Another character by the name of Bob didn’t realize the dangers of romance until it was too late. It’s a common story for many people. Vincent also had a friend who was pretty nervous the whole time, but he still pulled it together when he had too. If only he was a bit of a better fighter.

One of the dicier parts of the film is the first person camera strategy that is used for the first half of the film. I’ve never been a fan of the found footage genre and it only works for certain parts. It’s kind of interesting to see everything through the main character’s eyes, but I think it would work best if only used sometimes. It would definitely be tough to implement, but I’m sure that they can pull it off. The thing with first person is…it works best for interactive rides or (very small) segments of a video game or movie/episode. It can be used for drama and suspense. That is where the first person look works best.

There is naturally some plot hax to be found here since most escape films need them. How did Vincent get out of prison to go in the barrel? Why did the guard do such a terrible job of checking Irene’s car? How come the villains are all geniuses? These are questions that you may ask yourself as you watch the film. They aren’t huge, but you’ll still wonder about these scenes. Especially the first two since the film should have easily have been able to think of a more believable scenario.

No matter how you look at it, the second half of the film is a lot more exciting than the first parts. We get to see the lead get into a gun fight and put all of the pieces together. It feels more like the other two films since Vincent gets to use his experience to try and win the day. The film is still missing something though and it’s hard to place your finger on it. It’s still missing most of the soundtrack, but the writing is solid. The only thing that I can come up with is that the plot isn’t quite as engaging as one would expect. That…or the stakes are just too low. It’s a little hard to figure, but that does end up hurting the film a little bit.

Overall, Dark Passage was a pretty good film. The characters were definitely weaker than their counterparts in the other Bogart/Bacall films, but they were good enough. They would still be much better than your average protagonist of the modern day films. The camera work didn’t click with me though and it means that we didn’t really get to see the main character for a while. The film’s main problem is that it’s just less interesting than the last two. Of course, it is still a pretty good film overall and you should enjoy it if you like a casual escape story/mystery. I would sooner recommend another Bogart and Bacall team up, but I’m sure that any moviegoer will want to see the full set. So prepare yourself!

Overall 6/10

The Big Sleep Review

Posted on September 22, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time for another classic with Bogart and Bacall! This was still in the pre Godzilla days of cinema and those films were typically pretty intense. There are two genres in particular where classic films really shine. Kaiju adventures and mysteries. This is an example of the latter and it’s definitely a pretty compelling story. There are so many twists here that it can be pretty hard to follow, which also makes it pretty exciting!

Explaining the plot is pretty difficult as it was with the last film. The reason all of the twists and turns continue to lead into the next one so the original plot keeps adapting accordingly. Still, the plot begins with Marlowe heading into a mansion. He’s basically a private detective and he knows the ropes. “The General” hires him to get somebody out of the way…peacefully of course. This man is related to a racket that is blackmailing The General, which may be linked to the guy who ran off with Ms. Mars…or do they call her Brody now?…which may be related to Carmen’s police entanglements that could be why they found a body in the lake, which could have come from the mysterious house on the mountain, which may have something to do with all of the murders that have been occurring. Marlowe was expecting a fairly simple case, but maybe he’s bitten off more than he can chew with this case!

This film really had everything that I could have wanted from a mystery film. There are quite a few suspects and new characters continue to pop up. Marlowe makes for a pretty good detective and the film gets right to the point. It’s around 2 hours and they make sure to squeeze in as much action and suspense as possible. It’s safe to say that I preferred this one to the other film that I saw with the same lead actors. (To Have and Have Not)

Marlowe’s the main character and he is definitely better than your average lead. As I mentioned earlier, he has a lot of experience so he’s basically a pro by this point. He’s always got a witty comeback at the ready and he doesn’t take any sass from anyone. He even manages to block a slap and disarm a guy with ease. Marlowe is essentially invincible for the first half of the film. Unfortunately, he does start to crumble by the second half as he suffers two quick losses faster than the Vikings broke down against the Patriots and Saints this year! It’s a little surprising to see how quickly the tables turn on him, but I suppose that Marlowe is only human. He had to make a mistake sometime and it just happened to occur at a critical time. Through it all, Marlowe is definitely a solid character even if he does fall into the romance trap during the film.

Vivian is the main heroine of the film, although her role is a lot smaller than one would typically expect. She is around a lot to give Marlowe some advice that may or may not be true. She’s always trying to dig up some dirt on what Marlowe knows, but the detective always manages to turn her own words against her. It’s hard to tell whether she’s on his side or with the crooks since she can be rather shady. It’s time to add suspect number one to the list! She does use her romance skills to try and get Marlowe, which tends to work on the leads since it’s one of the only things that they think about. Ah well, retro films do typically have romance so it’s hard to avoid.

Eddie Mars is one of the bigshots and there’s no way that he isn’t guilty of something. The question is…is Eddie Mars The crook or just a crook? It’s hard to tell and he’s also pretty cunning so it’s hard to get any information out of him. He’s got his minions at the ready and he’s fairly powerful in the underground circuits. Messing with him could be pretty dangerous for Marlowe. They have a pretty intense meetup inside of the haunted house where guns are drawn..on multiple occasions!

Never forget that where there’s an Eddie, there is always a Joe! Joe Brody is another big shot and he lacks Eddie’s riches, but he still has enough to get by. He’s quick with a gun and his only mistake is that he likes to open the door without peering through the keyhole or asking “Who is it?” before opening. He gets his own action scene as well so show how tough he can be. We definitely can’t rub him off the list?

Don’t worry, it’s time for another gun wielding suspect in the form of Carmen Sternwood! Most of the problems are centered around her so it’s entirely possible that she is just orchestrating the entire thing. Her first scene is her trying to win Marlowe over and almost succeeding. She’s typically pretty high or emotionally unstable so it’s tough to get a read on her. With a gun..anything is possible here. We certainly can’t rule her out and she wasn’t a good character anyway. She does have her own personal minion though..so she is not as innocent as she seems.

Bernie is Marlowe’s friend who happens to be a cop. Wouldn’t it be a big twist if it was actually the really nice cop? Sure, but it may be a bit of a stretch to assume that it’s him. Of course, that could just be what I want you to think! He’s a pretty cool guy and he does send a few veiled threats at Marlowe to keep the hero honest. This guy’s one of the few people who can stand up to the hero at all!

This film does have a little more music than you would expect from the average 40’s film. I still don’t really remember any of the themes after watching it, but it’s better than nothing. This film has a decent amount of action since we get quite a few gunfights and even a quick hand to hand beatdown. There is some romance, but it’s not a whole lot so you should live.

One thing about the old films that can be amusing to see is how smart everyone is. It’s almost like every character is a genius. Not in an academic sense, but in a practical one. All of them know not to say too much and how to say it. They are all familiar with tricking the police and talking in very cryptic ways. Even breaking a code is not very tough for the main character. It’s interesting to say the least. At least this means that the hero knows how to get the jump on the villains to wrestle the gun away from them.

Overall, This was a pretty solid mystery. The writing was good and the pacing was very quick. There were many twists and even I would likely still wonder about some scenes by the end. All of the names just kind of blend together after a while and it’s hard to read the writing in such small print when they go to show the evidence. The film’s one weakness aside from the romance would likely be that they could have made the ending a little clearer. Give us some closure instead of abruptly ending. Either way, that’s good since the film will keep you guessing. It’s hard not to root for Marlowe since he’s just so great at being a detective. He really fears no one and he just continues to talk back to everyone that he meets. I highly recommend this film if you have been yearning to check out an old mystery and there is also some action to keep you interested in what’s happening. Let’s also not forget the haunted house atop the hill. This could end up as the best 1940’s film of all time! (A true feat to be sure)

Overall 7/10

To Have and Have Not Review

Posted on September 19, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time for a really retro film! This one came out in the 40s so this was even before the Godzilla days. Actually…even I wasn’t born way back then! (Believe it or not!) I tend to enjoy these classic films since they really did a good job with the writing back then. The characters are typically a lot more enjoyable and the gun fights tended to be more entertaining than the modern ones. Classic films have their weaknesses as well so it’s not all up, but they can hold their own. Was this film a true classic or was it the next Lord of the Rings? It’s time to find out!

Germany has taken France down for the count at the start of the film. There is only a small resistance movement left and they’re badly outnumbered and outgunned. These guys seem to have no chance and a hostile tension fills the land. The story follows Steve, a professional fisherman. He’s an American and that means that he’s in less danger than most of the other characters. He keeps reminding the Germans to watch out for Uncle Sam. (Not in those words, but he does mention his rights and threatens to call the Americans at one point) The French want Steve to transport a political figure from an area across the sea back to his hotel. Steve decides not too, but a woman by the name of Marie arrives and things start to get chaotic for the heroes. The french did not listen to Steve and they arrive only to be shot down. The villains decide to mess with Steve and Marie since they’re suspects and they steal all of Steve’s money. This results in Steve deciding to take the job as well as the fact that the villains were messing with Marie. Will Steve be able to make a difference in this war?

It’s a crude analysis of the plot, but that’s because it’s very plot heavy. Every scene leads into the next one and while the film is only 2 hours, you could say that there are 4-5 segments of the film. The plot continues to twist and turn as the film goes on and it’s hard to know where to draw the line. After all, you don’t want to spoil what’s going to happen and the actual plot for the film at certain points can become spoilers. It’s tricky and I figured that I would just dodge that part by giving the basic overview of the plot. Pretty ingenius eh? Well I try…

Is Steve a good main character? The lead is pretty crucial in a film like this since he’ll be getting a whole bunch of screentime. Only 3-10 minutes of the film take place without him and maybe even less than that. On one hand, Steve is the kind of guy that you want on your side. He’s very brave and he doesn’t back down to anyone. He talks back to the Germans, the French, etc. Nobody talks to Steve the wrong way if he has anything to say about it. He also makes sure to defend his friends so anyone who messes with them has to mess with him. Those are the positive qualities for Steve and it’s why I can safely say that he’s a dependable main character.

On the other hand, Steve does get heavily involved in the romance plot. He’s pretty easily wooed by the main heroine although he keeps his composure and uses insults to try and trick her into thinking that he doesn’t want her around. “Don’t get the wrong idea…..I’m not doing this for you….I’m doing it for me!” is the kind of thing that you can expect him to say. It’s definitely hard to tell at some points whether he is really as calm and collected as he appears or not since Marie really gets to him at times. I could do without the romance and I’m sure that you’ve already heard this in my older reviews. Still, Steve ended up being a good character.

Eddie is Steve’s main assistant on the ship. He used to be a pretty good guy according to Steve, but now he’s always drunk. The beer has already damaged him both physically and mentally. It’s too bad since you get the sense that he could have been a pretty likable guy back in the day. He’s still fairly nice, but he has a really short term memory and he is completely addicted to beer. It’s one of the only things that he thinks about in life. He’ll still stand by Steve until the bitter end, but he’s a shell of his former self. He’s certainly an amusing character though and he’s not quite as annoying as a modern version of him would be. Basically, Eddie was still a good character.

Marie is the main heroine of the film. We never get a full glimpse into her origin, but perhaps it is for the best. Why dwell on the past right? She starts out as a petty thief who uses people to get money, but she decides to go straight when she meets Steve. It’ll be dangerous, but the journey is worth it for the goal at the end of the road. She does jump start the whole romance angle, but I suppose that it was inevitable. We still had some nice banter between her and Steve at one point where they kept trying to provoke the other person. (Remember when people actually used the word sore instead of upset? That’s one “slang” term that died out pretty early on) The character development was really good for Marie though and she’s a much better character at the end of the film than at the beginning. It’s always good to see an example of character development helping someone since it has a tendency to have the opposite effect.

We had some other supporting characters, but they weren’t very memorable for the most part. “Frenchie” was constantly getting Steve into trouble, but it was for a good cause I suppose. The other members of the rebellion were not so great though and the big shot that Steve had to transport turned out to not be very great by the end. It’s safe to say that I was expecting a lot more out of him. The main villain is pretty fat and almost endearing, but not quite. It’s what I would expect so I give the film a thumbs up there.

There is not much of a soundtrack so the film scores a 0 there, but most old films didn’t have many solid themes playing. The simple reason that explains this is the fact that rock music wasn’t really around at the time. The writing is the film’s main strength. The dialogue is just first rate as you would expect and it’s mainly thanks to Steve since he gets about 90% of the cool lines in the film. The others help though and this is how you make a script!

Overall, This was a pretty solid film. The film is under 2 hours, but it’ll still feel like it has a longer runtime since so much happens in that time period. Most of it won’t even feel like filler since something is usually happening in the shadows. Steve is an example of a character who talks tough and gets dragged into romance, but still manages to be 1000X cooler than someone like James Bond. I definitely recommend this film if you’re looking for a solid dialogue film or if you want to see something involving the Germans from back in the day. The French are on the losing side in this film, but at least we know that things will get better once America jumps in. America definitely gets its props here and that’s always fun to see. There is some brief action in the film as well so that helps the film as well. Is this the best 40’s film that I’ve seen? It’s certainly possible! (I’ll just have to check which other films I’ve seen from this decade!)

Overall 6/10

Good Morning Vietnam Review

Posted on September 17, 2014 by dreager1

This review is of the edited TV 14 version of the film. Note that all of the statements above only pertain to this version and that the original version would likely be lower.

Good Morning Vietnam is a story that is loosely based off of real events and it takes place during the Vietnam war. That was definitely a pretty sad time for Americans and I watched a documentary on it a while back. It’s one of the only wars that we basically lost and we also had to deal with a lot of political drama back at home with rebellions happening all around the place. This film just focuses on the Vietnam aspect and how one man could try to keep the morale of the troops up.

Adrian gets transferred over to Vietnam to be the broadcaster for a radio station that is around to keep morale up for the troops. He enjoys the job and he’s pretty good at it. Adrian becomes friends with a native as he tries to romance a woman that he meets over there. Not everything is dandy though as his superior and his superior’s superior don’t like him. Luckily, his superior’s superiors superior does think he is doing a good job and that’s what counts. Will it be enough to keep him safe?

Well, that’s basically the gist of the film. The war is pretty grim so Adrian has to help everyone forget about it as they go about their daily duties. There is a lot of drama that is added through the subplots. The main character gets to see firsthand how destructive the battle is and that’s when he decides that the troops have a right to know what is going on. That really puts him at odds with the higher ups and things get pretty dangerous for him. Should he say what is happening?

Well, in this case I would have to agree with the government. I don’t think Adrian should lie about what is happening, but he just shouldn’t mention the war and what’s going on. For one thing, the transmissions could easily be intercepted by the enemy. We don’t want to them to know exactly what is going on. (Nowadays, information is definitely more available thanks to the internet) It’s like with the recent Snowden leaks. Many are glad about them because we know what the NSA has been up too, but it’s also compromised a lot of our data to the enemy and to our “allies.” Giving out any tactical information over the radio could definitely be dicey. I don’t think mentioning the place blowing up would be that bad for the government intelligence, but maybe the enemy would be glad to know just how many agents were injured during the blast. It’s probably good that we don’t supply them with that kind of information.

The end of the film seems to definitely take on a political stance as we get a traitor to the cause. He then gets emotional and tells the main character that the Americans aren’t wanted here. They keep on shooting innocent people and messing with government affairs that they don’t comprehend. The film is basically echoing the sentiments that many people had about the war. Many people think it was a mistake to get involved in the first place and especially our decision to keep on sending more and more troops to a losing battle. So, the film is on that stance and I have to wonder about mine. I’m pretty sure that it was a good move to come in to help and I like to think that not all of our soldiers became corrupt and started shooting innocent people everywhere. Back in those days, it unfortunately did happen sometimes, but to every country. No country is completely safe from that.

The Army did look pretty bad on a few occasions here though. One scene shows that some of the military personnel just hang out at a bar indulging their sinful pleasures when they could definitely be doing something more constructive. Did I mention that they are also shown to be racist? They don’t make up the majority of the troops and I would easily put them in the vast minority, but it’s still sad to see them portrayed like that.

The film can be pretty violent at times so I would advise you to think twice about seeing it if you don’t like realistic violence. It’s made in a way to look very similar to real battlegrounds after a fight and you definitely see the injuries on the soldiers. We also see people shot point blank inside a house and a chicken is almost murdered. It escapes, but it’s all pretty gritty at that point. Gritty is an appropriate word to describe the film as Adrian goes to the poverty sections of Vietnam and gets to see what the living arrangements are like. It’s all very bleak.

I can’t say that I cared for Adrian in this film. He’s just not the kind of main character that I can root for and he’s way too interested in romance. One of his first scenes makes sure to show this as he keeps believing that he sees the same person over and over. He’s way too desperate to get to her and he should be more focused on his radio broadcast. He’s a natural comedian though and he does a good job of thinking up his lines as he goes along. It’s definitely amazing to see him switch his voice so effectively. His jokes do go a little over the top at some points though so his style isn’t my favorite. The army seems to really love it, but I can’t say that I found most of the jokes to be funny. I suppose that it was before my time.

The main character’s friend is mostly around to be the comic relief of the story. He gets a bike that doesn’t fit and he’s there to laugh at Adrian’s jokes. The main superior thinks that he’s a great comedian as well, but nobody finds him funny, which can be pretty sad for the guy. He tried so hard and it just wasn’t enough this time. The superior of that guy is the main antagonist and he just wants Adrian out of the way. He didn’t like him from day 1 and that doesn’t change during the course of the film. Their styles are just too different and they weren’t going to get along. Due to a twist, the native that Adrian gets along with is definitely not likable and I didn’t care for the main heroine either. I don’t blame her for not wanting to go with Adrian, but then just completely tell him no and end it. She shouldn’t even let him take her out to the movies if she wants to stay away.

I didn’t care for the romance subplot and I could have done without the war stories. I think this film could have definitely scored a 5-6 if it had just stuck to the radio plot. Imagine if the film took place in NYC and Adrian had problems with his higher ups about his broadcasts. That definitely could have been an intriguing plot and it would have been able to hold up pretty well. It wouldn’t have been quite as “deep” but it still would have been pretty intense.

Overall, This film is an intriguing adaption of the Vietnam War. I shouldn’t call it an adaption of the war I suppose, but of something that happened in the war. Still, I don’t think that real life events should be crossed over with films. If it’s going to be an event, then just make it a documentary and vice versa. We should keep these two things separate for the time being. If you are interested in the Vietnam war you are likely just going to want to see a documentary. Robin William’s acting for his broadcasts is pretty good so fans of his may want to check this film out to remember him in one of his biggest roles. Otherwise, I would sooner recommend that you watch the current Naruto Shippuden episodes if you want to watch a big war.

Overall 3/10

Chronicle Review

Posted on September 15, 2014 by dreager1

It’s time to review the shaky camera film that came out not too long ago. It feels a whole lot older than 2012 though since I could have sworn that it’s been more than 3 years since we rented it. Ah well, memory doesn’t always go in a linear fashion and mine in particular has never been great. I don’t care for the camera style and there has never been a good movie that has used it (Sorry Cloverfield!). Still, maybe this will be the exception right?…..

The plot involves Andrew Detmer as he decides to start recording his life on camera from now on. He gets bullied at school and he has no friends. At home, his Dad is always drunk so Andrew is really in a tough spot. It may not make for a good film to watch on tape when he grows up, but at least he’ll have proof for the cops. Did I mention that suspicious characters have practically formed a gang and taken over his neighborhood as well? One day, Andrew is called out by Steve to follow him and Matt into an underground tunnel. Andrew refuses every step of the way, but his body and his mind don’t seem to be on the same page as he dashes in. He reminds everyone that they shouldn’t be down there as they grab the crystal and are instantly defeated. When they wake up, the three heroes realize that they have advanced telekinesis. With this kind of power…they can do anything! Will they learn to use their powers for the good of humanity or will they decide to crush all of the obstacles that had been in their life?

Well, I can’t say that this film was a winner for me anymore than Cloverfield. The shaky camera certainly doesn’t help and I don’t think that I will be converting into a fan in the foreseeable future. It just takes away from all of the scenes since you’re wondering how long the film will be until the camera goes away. A person was mugged at a bar for using the Google Glass in real life so imagine how much worse it would be for a kid who is already bullied to start bringing a camera with him to school? Only the plot allowed his camera to survive and the bullying actually gets a little worse once he starts using it. It also helps Andrew to withdraw from humanity along with the viewers.

Andrew Detmer is the main character and he is part of the moral of the story. What’s the moral? It’s essentially that power corrupts and “what goes around comes around.” Andrew has been bullied by his family and schoolmates for a long time and once he obtains his powers, Andrew finally snaps. The thing is, Andrew had likely already snapped many times in the past, but he just couldn’t do anything about it without his powers. It’s one of the reasons why the gun control law debates are so fierce. There are many bar room brawls that escalate and if they had guns, I’m sure that we would get many reports of people being shot. Andrew wastes no time as he blows up a hole in a hospital and starts to rampage through the city. He goes from Hero to Zero (I love that Kingdom Hearts rhyme) or essentially from bullied kid to the deranged bully.

I didn’t like him from the start and he’s just not my kind of film lead. It’s really why I didn’t like Peter Parker in the first installment of the reboot series. There are plenty of anime leads who start out quiet and sad like Aichi and Haruyuki, but they learn how to be sociable as they make friends. Andrew made two friends, but the camera prevents him from truly bonding with them. He is actually doing pretty well until his big incident at the party where he tries to prove that he is a man through romance. If great power won’t corrupt a person, romance certainly will. Did he really think that it would be a wise move to get intimate with a girl that he just met for 2 minutes? Andrew didn’t think it through and everyone would have walked all over him as they absorbed the money that he would earn with his abilities. His whole situation is pretty messed up and it’s very tough to get out of something like that, but he definitely didn’t handle it well.

See, once you have great powers..then the situation should naturally get better. The main character can emit a barrier around himself with telekenesis so he doesn’t have to worry about his bullies or his Dad anymore. He doesn’t have to hurt them, he can just protect himself or freeze them in place for a minute or two so they understand their powerlessness. There are a lot of ways to improve the situation once you have such useful powers and Andrew made all of the wrong calls. It’s one of the reasons why he wasn’t really likable by the end.

Matt is the main character’s cousin and he means well. He seems to put more of an effort into helping Andrew than the others, but it’s not easy. He can’t always be there so he doesn’t truly understand Andrew’s plight and it’s tough to really talk to the main character. Matt is also dealing with relationship troubles of his own at this point and he wants one of the girls to understand why he is so much cooler than everyone else. He doesn’t participate in the High School popularity stunts and he can be pretty arrogant. At the end of the film, it’s up to him to make the tough calls. He was possibly the nicest guy from the main three, but it’s still hard to find him likable. He has some good moments and then he also has some bad moments. He’s really just interested in romance when he talks to the main girl and that’s not cool. I never cared for the romance stereotype, but it’ll likely stay around for a while.

Steve is the third member of the group and he’s the one who really links the three main characters. He involves both of them when they find the chunk of rock that gives them powers and he is pretty popular at school. His life is pretty perfect compared to the other two and he takes everything in stride. Of course, he does help the other two pull off some pretty mean spirited pranks and he’s also way too interested in romance and using his powers for pretty bad means. Yeah, Steve does beat Andrew, but he could still be a lot better. He looks pretty awful in his final moments though since he is basically sucker zapped.

Richard is Andrew’s father and he’s really here as an obstacle to be overcome. His personality is just that he likes to get drunk and make Andrew’s life as miserable as he can. An accident made him quit his job and even though he has healed..he doesn’t bother to do anything with his life. He has no point in the story except to push Andrew over the edge. He says that Andrew is responsible for his mother’s final end because he was looking for Andrew to mess with him when the wife was dying. It’s the whole blame game and it doesn’t end. Richard really has nobody but himself to blame for everything that’s happened to him in the last few years.

There is no real soundtrack so I’ll skip the audio section. (0/5 for the soundtrack by default…) The fight scenes are surprisingly good, which is probably the biggest plus of the film. Maybe it’s actually not too hard to do them and films typically just avoid these type of fight scenes for fear of reviews like in Man of Steel, but they’re very well done. We see the craters from the big clash and the telekinesis abilities are a little more refined than when Jean Grey used to fight in the X Men movies. (Granted..this is a 2012 film) The fight scene wasn’t totally satisfying since one of the fighters was trying not to fight while the other one was already pretty crazy, but I’ll take what I can get. You can definitely draw a lot of parallels to Superman in the way that they fought. Not a whole lot of punches are thrown, but they fly in Superman stances and the craters may remind you of the fight between Superman and Zod. It’s just a lot better than I would have expected for this film and it would have been even better with a different camera style.

This is not a film where you should expect a happy ending. One of the reasons why this film isn’t that good is that it’s not very enjoyable. This is the kind of film that you can call a downer. Everything goes wrong for the main character from start to finish. He made the wrong choices at the end, which result in his end, but there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. It’s very gloomy and we just watch everyone bite the big one in the end. The cops naturally decide to shoot at the good guy who’s defending the city instead of the villain. There is also a really unnecessary scene where Andrew literally rips a spider apart. That’s when we realized that Andrew had completely gone off the deep end along with his speeches on natural selection. (Remember that he is talking to himself on camera…just saying..)

The only time where things are actually going pretty well for the heroes is when they’re pulling pranks at other people’s expense or when they’re at the talent show and Andrew realizes that showing off his powers for romance and money is all that he really wants anymore. It’s just a very somber film that won’t leave you singing “Everything is Awesome” the way that something like the Avengers would. The film will leave you worn out even though it isn’t very long since the ending will leave part of the city in shambles and more than a few people are either down for the count or in the hospital. At least, the one person with powers left should be able to get by just fine. (Overpowered powers are overpowered after all)

Overall, Chronicle makes most of the classic film mistakes. It has animal violence and no real themes. The main characters are not likable since they have many of the flaws that you see in everyday life. They just spam swear words through their daily life and just care about romance and being “cool.” It’s safe to say that the camera didn’t help either. Chronicle did have some great action scenes though and a sequel could work out a lot better than this one if it follows Matt’s story and goes with a traditional camera view. That would give it a pretty good chance of not only beating this film, but perhaps doubling its score. That would be pretty impressive for a sequel! If you want to watch a shaky cam film then you’re out of luck as far as recommendations go since I wouldn’t recommend this one. However, if you want a film about people with super powers that isn’t Sky High, I would recommend checking out Naruto Shippuden Film 3!

Overall 3/10

U.S. Marshals Review

Posted on September 8, 2014 by dreager1

A while back, I saw the Fugitive. It was a pretty good film, but I unfortunately forgot most of it. A few scenes here and there to be sure, but my memory isn’t as clear as it once was. At least, that likely won’t happen much in the future thanks to these reviews! U.S. Marshals is a pretty good film and while it may have dragged on just a bit, it was a fun watch.

The plot involves a guy by the name of Mark Roberts who is injured during a car crash. He is then arrested and accused of murdering two American agents. Naturally, they take him into custody, but a plane crash caused by a would be assassin ends up giving Mark his chance to escape. He must now find out who set him up and clear his name. Meanwhile, U.S. Marshal, Samuel Gerard, has to find Mark before he destroys more people. He has no reason to believe that Roberts is being framed after all so he has to mobilize his troops. Tagging along by ~~request~~ order of the government is a new agent by the name of John. (The Government actually went with John as the name….don’t they remember their lessons on how to be subtle?) Can the heroes trust him and is Mark Roberts actually guilty or has he been framed? It’s time to find out!

One character who is really hard to forget is the U.S. Marshall. Samuel Gerard makes for a very interesting lead since he’s very experienced and he doesn’t really make mistakes. By “mistakes” I mean both in duty and in character development. Samuel is just a tough customer through and through as he resists all distractions and stiff arms the government. If Sam had just let the government walk all over him, he definitely would not have been quite as cool as he was. He can also fight when the need arises as he holds his own against Mark Roberts. (Supposedly the latter is an exceptional fighter so that is major props for Gerard) Gerard’s teammates are not quite as useful or likable. I don’t think I liked any of them to be honest. I didn’t really dislike them either, but they didn’t really have a purpose in the story. You could easily cut them out and there wouldn’t be many changes. It would get rid of a certain rage moment, but that could have happened through other scenarios. In a sense, I’d say that I’ve been lucky with protagonists lately. It’s rare to find someone as good as the U.S. Marshall and I just finished watching a film where the President was pretty great as well. I’ve gotta admit that the 90’s knew how to make solid main characters. ~~Nowadays, it’s really just a free for all!~~

Mark Roberts is one of the main characters as well since he’s the one being chased the whole time. He’s a decently good character, but he’s definitely not as charismatic as Samuel. I don’t think he would have been able to hold his own film, but his scenes were pretty good. He’s definitely proficient in combat and he quickly adapts to the situation. It’s a good thing that he has some contacts because I don’t think he would really have a chance otherwise. It’s just him against the whole group after all. He does have one ally who helps him throughout the film. This is Marie and she ends up helping him out at critical points during the chase. Her role isn’t very large and she only makes a few appearances here and there, but at least she decides to trust him without calling the cops as you would expect from many other films. She never betrayed him and that’s always a good thing.

John Royce is played by Robert Downey Jr, which was pretty interesting. If not for the voice, I likely would not recognize him so he’s definitely changed over the years. As for the character, I’m sure that you’ve seen his type before. He’s the experienced professional that the government has added onto the squad so everyone resents his presence and he goes on to show them up….is what usually happens. The teammates don’t really mind him and while he is a professional, they show that he’s not quite as tough as the U.S. Marshal. He doesn’t play well with others and he always disobeys orders when he feels like it. He’s definitely not someone that you can count on. For a while there, he was actually a pretty likable character. By the end, he’s an intriguing one, but I’m not sure I care for how his character arc ended. It’s not really his decision that hurt his character, but the long theatrical way that he goes about making it. Just get over it and head to the next objective! He would have definitely been more impressive that way.

One thing you may have to question is the overall strategy of the U.S. Marshal. On paper it is a very sound strategy as they cover all of the bases and leave no stone unturned. The problem is the fact that he never seems to know what he’s going to do next. After following the suspects, they continue to follow them for as long as it takes. After a while, you just need to make a move and arrest somebody. By the time the heroes go to take out the villains, it’s typically too late. An example of this is when someone goes into a church with a suitcase…followed by another guy going in. The main characters just watch in horror for a while until they run in and the villains take the time to escape. Had the heroes charged through the door right away…they may have succeeded.

Another time where things got dicey was when the main character pretended to go for some coffee. I understand the plan and it’s a good one, but he took so long. If not for the villain stopping to boast about his master’s master plan and many other things, the U.S. Marshal would have definitely been too late to have done any good. It would have been Game Over at that point.

The film lacked closure in at least one way for me. I may have missed something, but it seems like one of the main villains actually manages to get away scot free. You’ll know who I’m referring to by the end, but he had a gun and he shot at the heroes for a while from the roof. He gets arrested, but the heroes admit that they’re toast thanks to politics. Diplomatic immunity is very real, but I’m sure that the heroes could do something. Show the proof and go through the military channels. Even if the government is shady, the information would have been made public.

As far as negatives go, I think the film may have dragged on a little. It is still my official view that all films should be two hours long at the very least and your plot should be good enough to carry you all the way. Of course, if your plot can’t hold out for that long, then accept the loss and cut some time out. The film could have cut out 15-30 minutes and it would have held up better. For example, letting Roberts get away after he was in disguise was one time too many for me. They should have just captured him and the exact same ending would have played out. We would have just skipped about 15-20 minutes where the heroes really do catch him. (We would have missed the sand fight, but I’m sure that they could have squeezed it in somewhere.

The Marshal’s boss could also be a little annoying at times. She keeps reminding the main character that he works for her so she can threaten him as much as she wants. She constantly reminds him that she doesn’t mind firing Samuel and she’s always giving him some kind of order. If she had been a little more helpful in the actual case it would be okay, but she typically isn’t. She’s just there to drag them all down with government policy. She only gets one hardcore scene with another politician and it was the Marshal’s idea.

It’s more of a formality at this point, but I’ll still mention the soundtrack. Unfortunately, it was pretty unmemorable and it was practically nonexistent. I can’t think of a single memorable tune and that’s always a bad sign. I wouldn’t really expect a soundtrack in this kind of film, but it’s still disappointing to see. A great soundtrack always has the potential to raise the film up an extra star so it could have come in handy here.

One more thing to mention is how the plane crew wasn’t very smart. One of the villains asks to go to the bathroom. Suuuuuuuure he needs to go…..that’s the oldest trick in the book. After they take him to the bathroom, the two cops leave to go talk. The villain has all day to grab his gun and head for the prisoners. Granted, the cops didn’t expect any guns to be on board, but they should have been paying attention. That was a pretty sloppy job on their part and they wouldn’t last a minute in Andy Griffith’s neighborhood.

Overall, U.S. Marshals was a pretty good film. It wasn’t great, but it was a fun watch and one that I would recommend to action fans or to people who like to watch government proceedings. It is more of a one and done deal though because this film has no real replay value. Films like this one rarely do since they rely on a lot of different plot twists throughout the feature. Why watch it again when you know everything that’s going to happen? It’s different for a film like Yugioh or the Avengers, but replay value doesn’t really affect the score anyway. (It would only hurt if I forgot to review this film and had to watch it again someday…) There’s definitely a lot to like in this film and hopefully you are prepared for it!

Overall 6/10

Air Force One Review

Posted on September 5, 2014 by dreager1

Disclaimer, Note that this is the TV version of the film so that it has been appropriately edited down to a TV 14 rating. The original version would likely score lower and every part of the review should be correctly associated with the TV version.

I’ve seen a few airplane films recently. By “airplane film” I mean a film where nearly all of it takes place inside of the plane. It’s an interesting genre and it tends to be pretty successful. I dare say that I liked this one even more than the blackmail film and the lost kid story. This isn’t just any ole plane story either…it’s an action film! There’s a lot more fighting involved than the others and the story is solid as well. There’s a lot of tension and excitement so this film earns the thriller genre. It managed to jump into all of the right spots and I don’t think I’ll be forgetting Air Force One anytime soon!

The plot involves the strongest country in the world as they helped to liberate another area. America is doing pretty well and the President promises that they will act a lot quicker in any future situation. He stresses that America will never negotiate with terrorists and he heads for the Air Force One jet to take him back home. He’s prepared to watch the game and everything is going well…until terrorists take over the plane. The President manages to fake his escape as he hides in the back of the plane. Alone and outnumbered over 5-1, President James Marshall must fight his way to the cockpit and find a way to save the many hostages. Among them are his wife and daughter…so this just got personal.

Unlike the last few films I’ve seen, Air Force One opens up with a pretty solid start. The men in black quickly dispatch the guards and take someone away. After that, the film really starts and we get some character development for the President and his men before they enter the plane. Of course, things really begin after the plane is hijacked. President Marshall makes for a great protagonist and I’ll be sure to talk about him in a bit. It’s safe to say that the film wouldn’t be nearly as good without him.

It’s interesting to see Marshall’s plan as he goes through the plane. He definitely can’t just run at the villains so he has to be methodical about his approach. There are many action scenes, but Marshall has to try and keep them quiet so he doesn’t alert the others to his position. The hostages have basically given up. It would have been nice to see them try something, but it would likely require at least one human shield and nobody was volunteering. Ah well, we’re mostly here to see the President defeat the terrorists anyway!

I don’t really have much to say about the soundtrack. I can’t say that any of the themes were that memorable, but I’m sure that everyone will recognize the victory music when the President first gets up in the jet. I actually agree with his plan to grab the phone since making plans with the outside world could really help. Too bad it was such a complicated type of phone though.

I do think that the other countries looked pretty bad or one in particular anyway. The pilots nearly land the aircraft and everyone is ready for the quickest end to a film in ages. Unfortunately, the police officers forget that terrorists are in the plane and they don’t try to land it. Maybe they had orders not to injure Air Force One, but those would be terrible orders. As such, the plane gets away and the terrorists get a free second shot.

James Marshall is the main character and he does a great job as the American President. This guy definitely isn’t messing around and he really believes in the ideals that he sets for America. We find out that he was actually a pretty great soldier back in the day and he even won a medal. That’s good because he wouldn’t have lasted long if he didn’t have that level of experience and expertise. He takes everything in stride and Marshall never cracks. He does have a moment where he has to question his ideals to save lives, but I don’t blame him for his decision. He arguably made the right call at that point and it’s easy to see anyone making that move. It’s also easy to sympathize with James since he just wanted to watch the local Football game before all of this happened. Now he’ll never get to watch the big battle!

Grace Marshall doesn’t really get to do a whole lot in this film since she’s one of the hostages. She takes the situation pretty well and she makes sure to try and protect her daughter as much as possible. She’s a pretty good character, but she really doesn’t get any notable scenes so there isn’t a whole lot to say about her. At least she doesn’t panic like half of the guys at the White House.

I have to admit that I didn’t really care for Alice Marshall’s portrayal. She’s the President’s daughter and there isn’t anything wrong with her personality. I would actually blame it on the writer. Her lines just don’t sound natural and I can’t imagine a 12 year old girl saying them with such confidence and poise. She lets the villain know that he’s nothing like the President and how he is a bad man while the President is a hero. Noble sentiments and I can certainly see someone saying a variation of that, but she’s really calm under pressure and her voice gets pretty deep as she says this. I think the lines would have been written to make them flow more naturally and perhaps she could have delivered them a little better. It’s a mix of the acting and the script in this case. One can also get a little irritated when she interrupts the President’s talk with the air force commando (To try and get home safely) to tell him that everything’s going to be okay. Wise words to be sure…but unnecessary ones at that point in time.

The Vice President is one of the major players in this film. She definitely does not look as impressive as the President and she does her best to make sure that he is safe. On that, she disagrees with some of the other members as they just want her to blow up the plane. “Save the lives of the many while sacrificing the few.” It’s definitely something that we see a lot so there is a lot of pressure on her no matter what choice is made. I have no qualms with her character and it’s just too bad that she never really got to fight.

Egor is the main villain and he’s as unlikable as you would suspect. He’s a crazed terrorist who wants to plunge Russia back into chaos like in the days of old. I don’t think any of us figured that they’d try to make the terrorist likable and that’s a good thing. At least they didn’t go overboard in making us dislike him either. He murders everyone, but at least he’s direct. I’m sure that everyone was waiting for him to meet his end and we even get an iconic line out of it. Egor is essentially the plot device that helps the film to move forward, but he’s not meant to be much of a character.

Gibbs is one of the big players of the film since he is the one who betrays America and aids the terrorists. The film tries an interesting method in his case since the viewers know that he is the traitor from the very beginning and yet he keeps up the act for a while. It’s pretty suspenseful since you don’t know when he’s going to try to backstab one of the heroes and you always have a sense of dread. As far as the villains go, he was much more interesting than the terrorists. His final lines are intriguing as well since he plans to trick the next President as well. I don’t think that would ever work since it should be obvious to everyone that he shouldn’t be trusted. This character definitely got a lot of screen time and we shall not forget Gibbs.

The guys on the ground team at the White House were all right, but they didn’t always take the events very well. At a tough time, the official forgot which wires to cut and he had to look at a schematic. As you can probably guess, he figured out which wire to cut a little too late. Another guy is just interested in asserting his authority over the Vice President. I’ll admit that he was definitely pretty bold and he would make for a good leader, but he definitely didn’t have his priorities straight. The secretary of defense was pretty bold as well, but I don’t think that anyone believed that his plan would work for a second. The co pilot at the end with the President is pretty good, but unfortunately…we know what to expect for him. He was in a pretty bad situation at the time and there wasn’t a really clear way out.

Overall, This was a pretty solid film. It has everything that you can really want from this plot. There are some scenes where you may feel like it’s a bit of a stretch with how easily the terrorists took over, but they had to get control of the plane somehow and it could have been a lot worse. A film like this is guaranteed to have some scenes where the viewer will be skeptical and it did a good job of minimizing this. The President is pretty likable and he has to use a lot of stealth to retake the plane. We get action scenes against other jets and the villains fight on til the end. The hostages can be a little annoying since they never try to do anything, but I guess they had already accepted their eventual demise. Naturally, this is a terrorist attack film so expect some people to be shot at point blank range and there are certainly a lot of casualties. If you don’t want to watch something that is fairly realistic in that regard, then this isn’t the film for you. It never really gets graphic though as the situation is worse than the actual shots. Otherwise, this is a film that I recommend wholeheartedly and it’ll join the other classics as a solid 90s film. It’ll be tough to top this film for a while! Also, don’t worry, it’s highly unlikely that terorists could take over Air Force One so easily in real life. Our government is prepared and ready to win!

Overall 7/10

2001: A Space Odyssey Review

Posted on September 3, 2014 by dreager1

Have you ever seen a film that made you go to sleep? No, I’m not talking about the Lord of the Rings! 2001: A Space Odyssey surpasses that film in that category as the scenes are even more stretched out and the film runs for around the same amount of time. With less plot than a Saturday Morning Cartoon; A main character that makes Alex Hopper look like Tom Cruise; and an ending that would make Inception viewers cringe….we have this film! I hope that you’ve prepared yourself accordingly because watching this film is basically like throwing hours of your life out the window.

What is the plot? The film never figured that out so it’s barely worth mentioning. The first plot is about animal violence and how we descended from Apes. The Apes learned to destroy each other until they managed to become as brutal as the modern humans. After that, we go to David Bowman as he goes to the board meeting. It’s a big conspiracy between the members as they can’t let the press find out what they’re about to do. This journey will be dangerous after all so they convince everyone that there is a plague on board. David takes Frank and Hal 9000 as they head off into the great unknown. However, nothing is as it seems and the humans eventually start to distrust Hal 9000. Obviously, there is only room for one type of being so now they will have to fight. Man vs Machine!

It’s like watching a bad sci-fi film that doesn’t know if it wants to be a thriller, a political film, or a thematic sensation. As a result, the story telling is very convoluted and nothing makes sense. The writing makes the Amazing Spider Man 2 look amazing and it makes the Lord of The Rings appear to be a thrill a minute in comparison. It’s no shock to say that I’m giving this film a single star and it would be hard to say where that star came from. (Or not, Hal 9000 was pretty epic after all) Let’s quickly talk about the characters since there really aren’t many to talk about.

David Bowman is the main lead of the film, but it won’t matter all that much by the end since he has no real personality to speak of. He’s pretty careful around the news reporters, which is good and he doesn’t really gossip. He’s pretty much a no nonsense character and he seems to be pretty reasonable. Did he get a little too drastic in his plan to get Hal 9000? That’s something we’ll discuss later on. Overall, I would actually say that Bowman was a decently good main character. He was very bland and he didn’t have much of a personality, but that also meant that he didn’t really have time to make many mistakes. I can’t say that he fell into any character holes. He’s a perfectly acceptable main character.

Frank Poole is his friend/co worker. You could say that he’s a more aggressive version of David Bowman. Bowman never really voices his opinion about Hal 9000 being dangerous until Frank suggests that they take him out. Bowman was hinting at it, but he was very indecisive and he seemed to want Frank’s agreement before even suggesting it. Frank isn’t subtle like that and everything he does is direct. Because of this, Frank ends up being more likable than David and he’s the best human character in the film. Going outside when the ship is a suspect may be a little….optimistic at best, but every character makes a big error at some point right? Frank Poole was definitely a good character.

Hal 9000 is the big villain of the film. He’s famous and everyone knows about Hal 9000. Despite this, Hal 9000 isn’t actually a very big player. His screen time is a lot shorter than I would have thought. Despite this, Hal 9000 is still as sinister as I had pictured. You really can’t get past his sarcastic voice. “Hello Dave” “I can’t do that Dave” are some of his lines and Hal 9000 never lets up. He has nothing but contempt for humanity and it really shows. I can definitely see why he was remembered since he was one of the only really good things about the film. Right down to the end, Hal 9000’s voice will give you the chills and his end is probably where the film should have ended.

Unfortunately, the film did not end! After that, we just get a lot of scenes that don’t really have any relevance to them. There are a lot of meta readings that you can take from the scenes, but you can also just go to sleep and let the film end on its own. The problem with trying to have a lot of symbolic interpretations is that there is no correct answer. Once you put out a vague ending, the viewer can name any ending that they please and it won’t really be wrong. Thus, there really isn’t a point anymore. The film had no point and that’s one of the saddest parts. We never really begin to like the main characters so there isn’t a sense of relief at the end.

The whole film is really dragged out. The first 5-8 minutes of the film are pure darkness and we even have an intermission with more darkness. The final 15-20 minutes just consist of random oceans and other locations where we can appreciate the view. If I wanted a good view, then I’d pop in my Homer Price dvd and check out the realistic donuts! The main character eventually goes insane and that basically represents the audience by this point. I think it’s safe to say that you’ll lose interest before the halfway mark of the film anyway, but this would throw you off if you were still on board. Even eating a sandwich can take a while in this film as they slowly go for the food and they take forever to finish it. Don’t worry, they silently jog afterwards to burn off the calories. Another example of how the film is dragged out is the conversation with the media. “I’m not at liberty to discuss this” is something that the main character says when they try to get information out of him. What’s his next line? The same exact thing! The writers were just grasping at straws at that point as they just wanted to drag out the dialogue as much as possible. The characters make sure to cough and take deep breaths so that they can stop themselves from replying for a little longer. The camera also has a little lag to it so the scenes end up staying on the screen for longer than necessary. Not that we could expect anything less from this film!

Okay, we’ve established that the film is boring right? I could keep on mentioning this fact and give more examples, but I think you get the point. Still, that can’t be enough to give it a 1 right? Even the Lord of the Rings scored higher than that! Well, one big hole that the film charged into was the classic case of animal violence. Yes, there is animal violence in a space film that is about man vs machines. Why is animal violence present? Because the film forgot what it was about!

The first half hour or so is about a group of monkeys massacring each other. That’s it….there’s no plot, no point, and no fun. It’s just about the animals hurting each other and maturing into humans. It’s essentially a silent film at this stage and it makes the silent scenes of the Arthur tv show look profound and relevant. By this point in the film, I already had a sneaking suspicion that the film could not score above a three. Little did I know that it would never rise up from this error.

The end of the film is all about being trippy and we have a lot of inverted colors and random events that occur. You keep waiting for something to happen and it never does so you’re left with an empty feeling. This is why you shouldn’t make a film very crazy looking just so that you can try to win some awards and get recognition for being unique. Using the tried and true formula of the Mario Bros film would be much better.

Now, should the humans have decided to destroy/dismantle Hal 9000 and his upper functions? He did make a mistake with the satellite, but was it really on purpose as part of some conspiracy? I definitely think that he was trying to cover up his mistake as the film went on, but I don’t think he would have felt that it was necessary to murder the whole crew if Bowman and Frank hadn’t discussed their plan. (Talking in front of a window is never a really smart thing to do) It just seemed like the humans were a little rash in their thinking. Hal 9000 may have been in error, but he didn’t seem to be malicious. There were possibly some veiled threats in his dialogue with the main characters and if he’s so smart…then the mistake had to be intentional right? Nonetheless, while there are some doubts as to what side Hal 9000 was on, they should have given him a chance. At least wait until they’re back on the ground to disable him. Going on the offensive just wasn’t a wise thing to do in their situation. Then, sending out Frank to put the satellite back in place? That’s just asking for trouble. I can’t say with complete confidence that deciding to work with Hal 9000 would have helped them out in the end, but I do think that he wouldn’t have turned completely evil. (Not so quickly anyway)

Overall, 2001: A Space Odyssey is a lot worse than you may have guessed from the cover. There isn’t much of a plot and the events that could have taken 30-40 minutes end up stretching to around 3 hours. The director really wanted this film to be long so he used every artificial technique that he could think of to keep the film going. Because of this, over a third of the film consists of pointless aerial shots or stills of the characters thinking. The intro with the animals is also pointless and the ending doesn’t add anything to the film. The only part with any meat to it was the battle against Hal and that was all too brief. Stay away from this film and all of its animal violence. You would have more fun watching paint dry or taking a nap. The only slight positive would be the main characters, but that’s really not enough to save such a long film. This film may be known as a classic, but I’ll just know it as the film that was more tedious than Lord of the Rings. Watch the latest Star Trek film if you want a good spaceship film.

Overall 1/10

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2001: A Space Odyssey Review

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