Category Archives: Live Action Movies

The Legend of Zorro Review

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When you watch a Zorro film, ordinarily you’re expecting the hero to look pretty good. Unfortunately that is not the case here as Zorro has his worst film appearance yet. The film itself isn’t bad but yeah it’s going to be a bit hard to get around that and the romance is absolutely abysmal here. Definitely one of the worst romances you will have seen in quite a while here. None of the characters look even remotely decent by the end of it.

The story starts with Zorro taking names and saving the day as per usual. Unfortunately his wife Elena is not happy with how much time Zorro spends away from the family. So they end up divorcing and Zorro gets super depressed. Fast forward to some time later and Elena has quickly rebounded with the wealthy Armand. She can now live a life of luxury with a man who will devote all of his time to her. Zorro is very jealous about this but it’s hard to defeat this guy. Zorro has become a bit of a drunk and Armand seems to be good at everything. Hopefully Armand turns out to be evil or something…or Zorro might be doomed.

I should also mention that Zorro and Elena had a kid which makes the divorce that much worse. The kid gets quite a bit of screentime and tends to be rather annoying. You have to try and watch his scenes as though the film is a complete comedy like his opening action scene where he defeats his teacher in a fencing battle. He straight up takes down a full adult and it’s meant to be real impressive. It’s more of a groanworthy scene. The fact that the kid can fight automatically makes him better than the average kid but he didn’t really need to be here.

Outside of the opening action scene which is admittedly very solid, don’t expect much from Zorro either here. The whole middle part of the film is him making a fool out of himself. Getting dunked on by Armand, allowing himself to be the butt of the joke like in the maid scene, and generally just looking very petty. He didn’t really give Elena any good reasons to go back to him. We finally get some fun Zorro action in the climax and even Elena gets a fight but it feels really late for that.

Part of the problem here is that the film has a number of plot twists to unveil but you immediately know that none of them are going to salvage Zorro’s character. Even if he doesn’t exactly know how things escalated with him and Elen so much, he should have been the bigger man and done some digging. Confront her and get to the bottom of the issue/find out if the problem is really that he is Zorro. As for Elena, the twists don’t help her at all. Lets just say it involves blackmail and then she has plans of her own but none of them really excuse her deciding to just leave Zorro in the dark.

In a perfect world they could have been teaming up the whole time. There would need to be significant changes to the plan of course but it could have worked and made both of them look good. Instead they just look really bad and Armand ends up looking a lot better. There’s a particularly embarrassing scene where Zorro is hiding behind some vegetables and thinks he has an opening so he walks over to Elena. Naturally he was not subtle and Armand caught him.

You’re going to be cringing really hard on Zorro’s behalf here. It’s crazy character assassination and I don’t think I need to go into detail on why this makes the romance really bad. Zorro and Elena’s bond was apparently weaker than you ever could have imagined for this whole story to take place. I also think to an extent the whole romance drama was added because the main plot wasn’t going to be enough to hold people’s attention. You have some drama over the states and the civil war approaching but it’s all rather boring. The villains are fairly generic and the plot just doesn’t have much life to it.

So I don’t blame the movie for putting the romance as the main focus but it absolutely could have given the characters some more dignity in the process. The film’s fight scenes are good enough where you feel like the movie should have leaned into that a whole lot more. With all of the big fight scenes this could have been an absolutely great film. Maybe actually build up to Zorro being too obsessive with sopping criminals to make Elena’s problem appear to be more valid. It’s always going to be a tough sell because he is saving lives throughout but it can be done. Maybe he starts to go too far or something.

As for the villains, well you’ve got a classic heel with Armand here. Whether he ends up being evil or not, play him up as the big antagonist. Someone who is a total jerk and taking everything that Zorro wants but without giving Zorro a way to take him down. He keeps his hands clean on the surface which makes Zorro more and more frustrated. The building blocks were all there to make this a really fun film. Then just write the kid out and you’re really all set.

Overall, The Legend of Zorro is a film that is fun to watch but you can definitely tell that it should have been a lot better. At times it does aim a little too young and goes with the easy jokes. The pacing is good though and the movie does feel like it really flies by. So you can see that there was a lot of effort put into this one, the priorities just weren’t always where they should have been. I’d still recommend checking the movie out but if you really like Zorro as a character…be warned that his appearance here is a bit diferent.

Overall 6/10

Retribution Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for what I would consider to be a very simple thriller film. There aren’t a lot of twists and turns in this one outside of the ending. It’s all about a simple threat that is tough to shake and how the main character has to deal with it. The whole film essentially takes place inside a car so the film has to try and write around this. I’d say it does a pretty good job all things considered.

The film starts off by introducing us to Matt who leads a rather stressful life. He encourages clients to use his company for stock trading and then has to convince them to hang on even when they start to go into the red. It’s not an easy job by any means since nobody can completely predict the stock market. Additionally, this does affect people’s lives. You can lose millions of dollars in an instant if you are not careful….or even if you are careful. Well, one day he is driving his two kids over to school when someone calls and explains that he has put bombs under each of the seats. None of them can leave now and they must continue driving until this mysterious villain is satisfied. What demands will he make?

It’s a tough situation to get out of since it seems like death will be inevitable. Somehow the villain is able to watch them inside of the car and it could literally be anybody. There is no easy way to call his bluff on this without risking the two kids in the car. If Matt was by himself then perhaps he actually would try something like that but it’s just too reckless in this situation. So yeah the villain had a pretty good strategy at play here.

Now to address the elephant in the room, the kids are both pretty annoying. It takes them an incredibly long time to lock in here. While Matt wasn’t telling them what was going on for a while, I feel like they could have picked up on the context clues. It’s clear that something was going on after all so they should have been on their best behavior. By the end they were doing their best to defend Matt but it was a little late in the day for that. Meanwhile Matt can’t expect too much help from his wife in this one as we have some marital issues going on here.

That subplot didn’t really seem to be necessary. I feel like the deck was stacked against Matt enough in this film so it’s not like this was going to really change things. Still, I was glad she was still ready to help the kids and wasn’t letting them get hit in the crossfire. In a way, Matt having to watch the kids actually changed the villain’s plans somewhat.

One of the best scenes in the film is when the villain finally makes his appearance and delivers a grand speech. I have a big weakness for smug speeches like that where the villain just goes into detail on how completely he has won. There’s something really satisfying about it. The villain played his role well, even stressing Matt out with what I would consider to be some empty bluffs.

The villain was aided by the FBI here as their main fighter wasn’t the smartest. She seems to be absolutely determined to prove that Matt was the mastermind here even when it started to become apparent that this wasn’t the case. She was far too stubborn and that is not really becoming for someone in her position. It feels like there should have been many ways to verify Matt’s story or at least find some evidence. She just wasn’t giving him a single inch even when there were a lot of lives at stake. As a result, Matt really had to act on his own the whole time.

So how does the film stay interesting when it’s just Matt driving around the whole time? Well, that’s where the writing/mystery comes in handy. You’re wondering how Matt will be able to find anything out the whole time. He is starting this round out at such a massive disadvantage after all, it’s not easy to bridge that kind of distance. If there was no mystery then this may have faltered but the car angle just worked really well.

It would have been nice to have gotten a proper fight scene at the end of the film though. It wasn’t really that kind of film but it would have been the real cherry on top for the entertainment value. The final action scene still worked well though. Also the film has a fairly light tone even when serious stuff is going on. That works well for letting you just have fun with this. The first victim for example is so crazy that the scene isn’t as dark as it normally would be.

She is clearly told that there is a bomb in the car and it will blow up if she tries to get out. Despite this, she is trying for several minutes to busy the door down and run while her boyfriend tries to hold her back. Ultimately he isn’t able to do this and they blow up. Then you have another guy begging with Matt to let him live while ignoring the fact that Matt is on a phone and clearly taking orders. I mean, Matt could have absolutely been a lot more clear about the situation. Maybe he thought it would be too risky but he did let everyone think he was the villain when he didn’t really need to. This made his journey really tough in the end. So there’s technically a lot of sadness within the film but the tone rarely gets around to reflecting that.

Overall, This is a pretty fun film. It’s certainly nothing grand, the plot is straight forward and uncomplicated. That said, the pacing is good and the writing works well enough. I didn’t think the movie had any glaring weaknesses and it has a good amount of replay value. I’d definitely recommend checking it out whenever you have a chance. I think you will end up liking it more than you would have expected.

Overall 7/10

Prince of Darkness Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for one of those really spooky titles. With something called “Prince of Darkness” you already know that you’re not exactly in for your normal film experience. This one dips into sci-fi as well as the horror genre so that really makes this an unforgettable experience. The movie gets serious props for managing to get a really intense atmosphere within the film but also does tend to go a little too far with all the gross imagery and violence. At the end of the day I would call it an elevated slasher but make no mistake, everyone is being taken down.

The film has a professor bring along his most talented students to a church for some kind of project. They’re going to be here for days so they have their own beds and everything. They all specialize in different kinds of science so whatever is going on here has to be really massive. They are all being kept in the dark on what is going on here. See, it turns out that in this world, the Devil is actually an alien that has been trapped underneath the Church. Unfortunately he is slowly breaking past the seal and if he escapes, the whole planet is lost.

Honestly they should have told the students this from the start or at least a similar story to get them motivated. It’s not like most of them would have believed that anyway right? It would have at least given them some urgency though as they are initially really chill about the whole thing. Since they are each experts of their field, it probably would have helped them to target more specific solutions as well.

As the film goes on, we see how slowly the situation is getting worse and worse all around. The Church begins to get surrounded by the homeless who all seem to be affected by the evil influence. The Devil is able to shoot out his energy whenever he wants and mind controls people too. So even though he was technically still sealed for most of the film, it seemed to be because he was allowing it. He takes over the computers and begins to start hunting the humans in earnest later on.

That felt like cheating the premise a bit here. You’d think that the humans are at least safe until they run out of time or the container breaks. Letting the villain be able to bust through that just made the situation even more unwinnable. Now based on the cryptic dreams of the future, it may not have mattered but you should at least afford the heroes some hope.

I will say that the main characters do act like classic horror characters in the sense that they do not make the smart decisions even when their lives are on the line. Forget the evil supernatural stuff for a minute. You’re in a rather rough neighborhood, why go outside after dark into the back alley? I think he was going for a smoke or something but naturally he is surrounded and then murdered. The people who got destroyed by their mind controlled colleagues get a little mercy from me because that’s not something you could really predict.

Going outside like that was not smart though even if the whole thing is tragic. Then you have the priest who is someone you can pile a lot of the blame on. He is putting the characters in a really rough situation without proper context so they have to figure it all out slowly. Even when he sees all the signs that they are running out of time, he mainly just panics. By the end he finally has his moment in the final hour. So he ends strong but it would have been nice if he had a better role in the first half. Perhaps he could have helped with some supernatural support right? Although his faith was clearly shaken from the start.

The movie has a lot of weird visuals the whole time like a pigeon being crucified and different people melting into worms and shooting up ooze. So needless to say, it’s the kind of film that could make you a bit queasy. It’s also traditionally violent at times but the bigger focus is definitely on the weird elements here. You could really cut all of those out and that would make the film work better.

There’s also that sense of claustrophobia here as the heroes technically are in a big building but have no way to get out because of the sheer number of enemies outside. When the enemies want to get in, there will be nothing to stop them. Then with each member of the research crew starting to go bad, even the indoors is no longer safe. I have to give the film a lot of credit for how big the main cast was. You even start to lost track of some of them after a while which is intentional because even within the film that happens to a few of them. When someone is gone for a while you have to wonder if something might have happened to them. That slow feeling of dread works really well.

If the film had just stuck to that instead of going more for the edge then it would have worked out a whole lot better. Perhaps the approach of trying to create that authentic evil atmosphere is ultimately what really backfired here. I think it would have been interesting if the film had delved a little more into the ramifications of the devil being an alien too. There is a good amount of dialogue and pondering in general but not usually on that angle. The writing is solid though so the film will hold your interest the whole time.

Overall, Prince of Darkness is a really intense film to be sure but it’s not one that I would recommend. It gets a little too grisly as the film goes on and the heroes were never given a proper fighting chance here. If anything it felt like they were being toyed with and depending on how you interpret the ending, there was never going to be a path to victory. So it makes for an intense watch but one that ultimately ends up feeling futile. I’d like to see another try at this one with the characters gradually vanishing or being pit against each other but without the devil actually being able to control them. As long as the seal holds, his main weapons should all be that of trickery and manipulation. Any direct action just widens the gap way too much.

Overall 2/10

Road House (2024) Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

I saw the original Road House not too long ago so now it was time to see if the remake could win. You never really know with these things but in this case I can safely say that it wasn’t even all that close. This one was just the better film all around. It’s certainly not amazing or anything like that but just had a better time, a more fun atmosphere, and certainly a more satisfying ending.

The movie starts off by showing us how Dalton is such a feared fighter that nobody wants to battle against him. Well, it seems to be part of an elaborate scam as well but the point is that he’s good at what he does. At this point he has hit rock bottom though thanks to some dicey moments in his past. Just when he’s about to end it all, he gets invited to be a bouncer at the most dangerous club in America. Dalton agrees to take on the job but it turns out to be even more dangerous than he would have guessed. He is outnumbered and the rowdy folks have guns. Can he really protect everyone?

Now make no mistake, Dalton would be dead in 5 minutes if the villains were serious. They constantly run up to him in close quarters so he can slap away their guns or get sloppy from long range. In a hand to hand fight he can certainly mess them up but these guys have the cops in their pocket and have a ton of clout. Enough where they could have easily just made him disappear in a night instead of going through the whole show. So we’ve got a whole lot of plot armor here but it doesn’t take away from the film being pretty fun.

Dalton is one of those supremely confident fighters who always has a smirk on his face. He tries to pretend that he isn’t a big shot but it’s a rather half hearted attempt where he keeps just enough of a smirk to know that he’s not serious. He’s probably not someone you can count on as a reliable friend but he does a good job of protecting the bar. You just can’t expect him to essentially be taking on an entire town’s worth of villains trying to break the doors down.

The one time you will probably think he sold out on the heroes is when he is having a drink near the end while everyone is getting absolutely destroyed by the villains. One guy gets his head slammed into a counter, another is getting his arm broken, etc. All the while Dalton is just watching. That part didn’t really make any sense. His counterpart, Knox is on the other side beating everyone up and Dalton is just watching?

When you have a battle between two forces and each one has one alpha fighter, they have to take each other out of the equation. If one has their top fighter going up against the middle ones, then of course it is going to end very badly. I otherwise didn’t blame Dalton for wanting to leave midway because this did seem like a never ending fight that was not going to go his way.

In this film, Dalton also doesn’t have any real backup. He has to handle everything himself which isn’t easy. At first when Knox showed up I thought he was going to be the ally but it turns out that he is the most twisted out of all the villains. I suppose that first scene should have clued me in right away but I figured it was just to show how intense he was. Knox does make for a really good villain though. His accent can feel super exaggerated at times but it’s possible that he really sounds like that.

The guy is an absolute beast in battle and he can really hang with Dalton in a fight. Dalton is probably just a tad more skilled one on one but it’s close enough where the fight could go either way. No other villain is on Knox’s level here just like none of the heroes are on Dalton’s. The main villain is technically Ben but the guy is out of his depth the entire time. He comes across as really spoiled and whiny. He’s certainly not the mastermind type here.

For the heroes, unfortunately none of them really get big roles. At one point Dalton hires a guy who likes to fight a lot so I figured he would be really tough but instead he ends up getting an absolutely tiny role and never gets the big wins you would have been expecting out of him. I suppose he can still defeat the basic enemies but that’s not going to make a big difference here.

There is also the owner of the bar, Frankie but she doesn’t do much either. She talks tough and you figure she may find a way to back Dalton up but nah she just watches the whole time. I was really hoping she had some kind of trump card to show why she was so confident. Without one, it feels like she just got lucky since the villains could have bumped her off at any time. She seems to live at the bar so it’s not like it would be tough to find her.

There is also Charlie but she’s mainly just around to give Dalton a motive to keep on fighting. I don’t think it was smart to try and fight a bunch of armed adults. I know it was supposed to show how brave she was but that is definitely a point where you’re just being dumb. Her father had the right idea in escaping for that specific circumstance.

Then there is the heroine Ellie. Can’t say I was a big fan of hers. She doesn’t like violence but still decides to get with Dalton and moves so fast even he points out that this doesn’t make any sense. She is helpful in getting him to escape from the corrupt cops but I would have liked her to have been a little more helpful in the end. The romance was ultimately not all that goo and she should have had a role beyond that.

The fight scenes are interesting because the camera angles are really crazy. It felt like all of the fights were digitally altered or something with how the characters appeared. Maybe an odd frame rate? Either way there was something surreal about the fights. They were still pretty good but you didn’t really feel any of the impacts between the characters. The fights could still get rather bloody but weren’t super intense.

I’d still give the film a thumbs up for the action though. The film is very fast paced so there is always something going on. The violence can be a little over the top at times so you should keep that in mind. This is definitely not a film for younger audiences. The film’s light hearted tone can certainly make it feel that way at times but you can bet there are some violent deaths in this one.

Overall, Road House is significantly better than the original film. If you’re up for a film with a lot of action then this will be right up your alley. The deck is stacked incredibly well against the main character so you will have to expect some plot armor though. Realistically Dalton would have been dead early on in this adventure. There just isn’t anything he can do when even the cops are on the villains’ side. Still, he fights hard and does his best. The film also does show that he is rather crazy so that helps to show why he won’t just back down even when he is outnumbered. Dalton will continue fighting on til the end and I’ll be curious how the sequel plays out.

Overall 6/10

M3gan 2.0 Review

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This movie is pretty interesting because it has a downright excellent premise but executes it in one of the weakest ways I could have imagined. The script tends to need a lot of work, the fight is basically just teased for 90% of the movie, and the final climax/ending aren’t as good as they should have been. So in that sense the movie left a lot of meat on the table, but on the other hand…I still had a good time with it. I would say it is still a good movie even if it’s not amazing.

The movie starts off by introducing us to a new robot named Amelia. She is essentially a weaponized version of M3gan who can be sent into active war zones or other places that could be dangerous. At first this looks promising but then she goes rogue and appears to want to end humanity. This forces the government to locate M3gan’s creator, Gemma. M3gan shows up beforehand to warn her that this will happen but the government shows up with threats anyway. Gemma knows she will have to stop this new threat but doesn’t want to rebuild M3gan. Will she be able to stop the new android or will she be forced to turn to her old enemy?

Naturally I like a good hero/villain teamup. It tends to make for an exciting plot and that’s the benefit of being a sequel. Long time horror fans may be dismayed to learn that the horror is mostly gone though. The intro scenes with Amelia temporarily bring back the horror with a few jump scares and vicious murders but after that this becomes a full on action movie. Fortunately I love action movies so that worked for me. This has that classic summer blockbuster feel to it.

Lets get into the negatives right away though. You are looking forward to M3gan fighting Amelia. That is pretty much the core point of this film’s plot. Despite that, they don’t really fight until the very end of the film. The first time they meet, M3gan is in the wrong body. After that, Amelia is in the wrong body and they are interrupted before they can fight. Finally we get a battle near the end but M3gan was already super weakened so it still wasn’t an even fight. They made a massive mistake here if you ask me.

We should have gotten a big fight in act 1, then the rematch down the line. It felt like that was the obvious play right? I would also say another weakness is that the writing is generally pretty weak. Lots of lines that will just make you wince or even worse, cringe. They try to write M3gan as being very direct and without shame so she tends to get more of these lines. It’s a tough balance because she also has the best lines but some of them are just being crude for no real reason. I’m hoping they can strike a better balance in the next film.

Finally one more negative would probably be the long singing sequence we get from M3gan. It’s clear this was meant as a funny joke but it’s another example of the film’s poor execution since it drags on for too long. I think it would have been funny if it was just at half the length that it was. Unfortunately that didn’t happen.

On the character side, Gemma is okay I suppose. She seems a bit passive the whole time and it feels like she isn’t properly recognizing the incoming threat here. Amelia is certainly dangerous and a bunch of government fighters even broke into her house. Deciding not to rebuild M3gan is one thing, but she should be telling Cady what is going on and getting a plan together with all of them. That would at least allow them to prep. Otherwise it feels like she is setting them up for a loss here.

At least she does get some action later on. Those fight scenes were fun and hopefully if we were to get more films, she would remain as one of the fighters. We could get a nice tag team with her and M3gan eventually. If you like Gemma’s sidekicks though, they don’t do a whole lot here. A few scenes sprinkled in but yeah I wouldn’t expect much out of them. This is not the humans’ show. In general most of the humans just look bad. We get the rich entrepreneur character who is easily seduced by Amelia.

In general the romance in the film is pretty weak. The classic villain getting seduced trick never ends up being convincing. Then we have Gemma going out with Christian but apparently, he’s not even really her type? M3gan gets some incriminating details on her searches and yeah that’s rough. Sounds an awful lot like settling and that’s a recipe for disaster. It’s not a big part of the film so I’m hardly going to dwell on it, but yeah that was a rough look for the heroine.

As for M3gan, she definitely dominates throughout her screentime. She is the most prepared out of all the characters by fault and also has way more charisma than the others. That really goes a long way here. Additionally, she can fight so at least the heroes have someone who is ready. I also thought Amelia made for a good villain. We didn’t need any grand speeches or motivations besides ending humanity. Amelia just does what she wants and that works well for an evil A.I.

The special effects are pretty good and the soundtrack was generally solid. The movie has good pacing and really flies by. I also enjoyed the tone as this movie is really just trying to give you a fun time throughout. I can always respect that. That’s why I’d ultimately say this was a good title. It just feels like a wasted opportunity since it could have easily been great.

Overall, M3gan 2.0 is what happens when you land an amazing premise but forget that you still have to execute it with care. That said, I still recommend it. You don’t get horror films that turn action like this too often. I imagine it feels like Terminator 2’s initial premise when that film was coming out. It’s a lot of fun and I would definitely check out a third film. As a franchise M3gan may not have lasted very long but I definitely will remember the character so in a way you could say that she did become a true horror icon.

Overall 6/10

Brain Dead Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Okay this is a weird film right off the bat. There are lot of dream sequences here and the whole time you have to wonder what is real and what isn’t. I definitely haven’t seen many films like this so it will forever be a memorable experience. Of course that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’ll be a good one. Some of the dreams lean a little too hard into the lead’s worries about what his wife is doing when he’s not around and I wanted to see more of him really going crazy. It’s worth the watch as you try to figure out what is going on but I dare say there isn’t a ton of replay value here.

The movie begins with introducing us to Rex who is a top neurosurgeon. He’s one of the best in the business but unfortunately it isn’t a very profitable one and money has been tight. It’s at this point that he is approached by Jim, an old “pal” of sorts. This guy has been doing really well for himself and he has an offer. See, there’s this guy named John who came up with something absolutely brilliant but then went crazy and ran off. They found him but John has total amnesia of what he even invented. So the company wants Rex to go into his mind and fix it. The operation has a large chance of just leaving John braindead though which Rex feel is completely unethical.

Of course, money does talk though and so Rex decides to go through with this after facing more pressure and a homeless guy showing up to wreck one of the last available brains. The operation seems to work…except now Rex’s life is being turned upside down. One day he wakes up as John, the next scene he’s in a plane that is about to crash, etc. It’s like Rex is trapped in a series of unending nightmares with absolutely no way to escape. He needs to find some way to grab onto reality….but can he do it?

How much you enjoy the film will really come down to how much you enjoy the dreams. After a point it becomes clear that most of this isn’t actually happening and so I could picture some people totally checking out. That’s definitely valid, although for me I kind of enjoyed it because I just liked how crazy it got. The situations would be absolutely wild and I also was glad that Rex didn’t let them get to him for quite a while.

He kept on insisting that he was Rex no matter what anyone else was saying. Even with the evidence against him, he wasn’t going to declare defeat. That is the right way to handle such a crazy circumstance. You have to fight for yourself even when nobody else will. No matter how many times the doctor kept trying to say that Rex was just a patient, Rex wouldn’t buy it. I thought that was pretty commendable.

Of course like I said in the intro, he does let himself get a bit too worried about Jim the whole time. Now, sine he is trapped in these dreams I guess to a certain extent he has it extra tough since he doesn’t really know what is real and what is fake but it keeps turning out that his wife is going with Jim or just being super oblivious and not realizing that he is pulling the moves on her. In either case, Rex needed to handle things better instead of getting super drunk and ruining the meeting with a big investor. Those were times when Rex didn’t do so good.

Othe times he tends to be very proactive like when he was in the ocean and had to swim fast or when the crazy guy hid in his closet and Rex had to act normal for the nurse. I should mention that while the film isn’t overly violent, there are a few jump scares/shock value moments. You will see the brain for example and some people have pretty serious injuries. So definitely keep that in mind, this film is certainly not holding back in that respect.

Corporate worked well as the big villains here. I liked how they were in total control the whole time and were constantly waiting for Rex to make a mistake. They can’t lose either way. Either John goes braindead in which case the secret is taken to the grave, or they get his memory back and coerce it out of him. Corporate is always looking at the big picture here and they are certainly ruthless. In the dreamworld it even seems like they might disappear Jim if he fails them. So yeah the stakes are definitely high there. The film also established pretty well that this is a dangerous area too like with the random homeless guy and speeding cars everywhere. Adds a bit to the chaos and that’s when the film is at its best. Just hitting you with endless chaotic moments with no time to breath. The film should really never slow down to try and talk to you, just keep going full speed ahead.

I would have liked the wife to have had more of a role there. Have her poking around and finding clues about what corporate is doing or something like that. with how the film is set up that may have been a little difficult though. Maybe she could be in the dreams aside from the illusion version of her? Would have been a nice way to have given Rex a bit more of a fighting chance at least although he would be in for a tough time either way.

Overall, Brain Dead is a very interesting film. I give it kudos for the unique approach and it is the kind of film that will keep you guessing. At the same time, I do think they really could have done a bit more with it. Either double down on the dreams and make them even more chaotic without a definitive ending to tell you what actually happened or maybe throw in an objective. Like having Rex find out that he has to survive for 3 hours in the dream to return or something. It would essentially be a different movie though. The ending isn’t the most satisfying so that could have made a difference but if you’re looking for a really weird film to check out, this is definitely right up your alley.

Overall 5/10

It! Review

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It’s not time for that clown horror film, instead it’s time to look at a lesser known one involving a golem. It was a little better than I was expecting to be honest. The characters aren’t the best but I would say that in a way the film had a subtle sense of humor about it. It may have been unintentional but it still worked and the film ends up being one that you won’t be forgetting about anytime soon.

The movie introduces us to a disturbed man named Arthur. There’s always been something really off about him and the film doesn’t need to go into detail on this to assure you that he is someone to stay away from. He looks forward to getting a big promotion as the curator eventually but the process is taking a while. One day there is a huge fire where everything in a nearby storage area burns down except for a single golem. Arthur’s boss asks him for something to read it better with but Arthur is slow to move and the golem ends up crushing the guy.

Now Arthur can get his promotion right? Well, instead the board goes with someone else which is definitely upsetting. Arthur decides to actively use the golem as a weapon of destruction in order to clear out the competitors as well as impress his crush Ellen. Ellen seems to feel bad for Arthur and humors him to an extent but she actually likes the fancy guy from New York named Jim. Jim will definitely need to watch out now, but what can he do against a golem?

There are some parts of the film that don’t fully seem to make sense but I suppose you can fill in the blanks. For example the Golem initially seems to do whatever it wants like when it murders the curator by crushing him but then after Arthur actually activates it, the golem begins to work for him. So in the initial scenes, was the Golem working on past programming or something? Additionally, Arthur picked up the trick to controlling it rather quickly when you’d expect that he would have just been another victim.

The film tries to show that perhaps insulting the golem is what makes it made but it’s not like the original curator did that. So it’s going to be a little hard to really understand the golem’s motives. I suppose they aren’t that important. It has a fairly decent design and is definitely very powerful as shown in the bridge incident. He makes for a decent villain but of course is very slow so any fighter who is paying attention should be able to dodge the attacks.

Then we have Arthur who really looks bad here. Aside from being crazy and all, he is desperately going after a lady who is clearly not interested in him. She makes it rather obvious and while I think she could have been sterner, he’s got to take a hint. Arthur is just so desperate and controlling a golem could have easily made him rich and successful if he used it the right away. Then perhaps she would have been more interested in him.

No, instead he just thinks destroying a bridge will impress her for some reason. Ellen is rather naive though like when she gets a call from Arthur late at night saying how he desperately needs to see her. Ellen seriously considers going even if Jim was encouraging this before the twist that he would go in her place. That should have been a notion that would be impossible to her. It’s an extremely bad idea to meet anyone alone at night, particularly someone who has a big one sided crush on you.

Jim is a fun character though, albeit he could be a little overconfident at times. Meeting up with Arthur when he started to have suspicions of wrongdoing was very risky. In fact, there were several times where Arthur came close to destroying Jim. The whole thing could have gone sideways for him in an instant. I do like confidence though and that does help keep Jim higher than he would be otherwise.

There is definitely a body count in this film although the kills aren’t as violet as in other horror titles. There is a level of violence to be sure but you can tell the film is more interested in the overall premise than being a splattershow. So I appreciated the restraint there. As a result the film can actually be a good bit of fun at times. While crazy, it is fun to see Arthur dropping veiled threats and outmaneuvering everybody even when he’s rather sloppy.

The whole hiding the key in the bookshelf idea for example was so risky since someone could have checked there before and realized that the key had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. He also takes super unnecessary risks in stealing artifacts from the museum before returning them. This guy is definitely not a mastermind and without the golem he would have been taken down a lot sooner. The climax is also a whole lot more explosive than I would have guessed.

Overall, It! was a little better than I expected. I do think part of the charm is in a cheesy/camp kind of way though. The film takes itself moderately serious but as long as you can have fun with it then you’ll be okay. If you are looking for a really scary film then this will not be the one for you though. Also if you’re hoping for a real romance, the movie doesn’t have much time for that either. No, it’s more about the reverse romance of figuring out if the golem is actually alive and who is controlling it. As the viewer you have all the answers and are waiting for the others to figure it out. The execution was key and ultimately it was good enough here. I have a feeling that the clown movies would not be able to compete.

Overall 6/10

The Ghost of Yotsuya Review

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It’s time to look at a well known foreign horror film and unfortunately this one was pretty bad. I was expecting some decent entertainment and all but in the end it takes way too long for the ghost to show up. It turns out to be more of a messed up drama for most of the film and the villains stay really annoying throughout. It’s always one of the risks you run when you have a film built around a bunch of villains. You’re waiting for justice but in a film like this it will be a long time coming.

The movie starts with a guy named Iemon wanting to marry Oiwa. He had a bit of a deal with her father but the guy changed his mind and it’s easy to see why. Iemon doesn’t seem like the most put together fellow around. He has let himself go and is patrolling the streets like a homeless person. Well, ultimately he decides to murder her father and his guards. Then he makes his move on Oiwa who essentially decides to get with him as long as he avenges her father’s death. Iemon wants to keep the charade up forever but one guy, Naosuke happens to have witnessed the murder and begins his blackmail. He basically wants Oiwa’s sister as his compensation and keeps on blackmailing Iemon. The two of them continue to sink deeper into this conspiracy.

Now this is really just a problem with the old Japan type films but the honor system goes way too far the whole time. The fact that both girls are willing to marry guys they don’t love just for the vengeance angle is too much. Oiwa at least doesn’t mind Iemon all that much but the sister didn’t like Naosuke at all and still goes through with this. All of their scenes are absolutely brutal. You’re just waiting for the ghost to show up already.

Unfortunately, the ghost angle isn’t a factor until the film is nearly over. So first you have to see Iemon humiliating Oiwa over and over again as he proves to be a terrible husband and even prepares to marry another girl on the side. His love for Oiwa wasn’t even true which just makes Iemon even worse of a character. Obviously he was a villain/murderer from the start but at least if he really loved Oiwa there would be some sense of humanity left. Instead, he is just a shallow guy who gets bored quickly and then continues to inflate his body count.

He can’t stop himself from murdering more and more people and that does not help his final goals. It just gets him deeper into trouble. Not that you feel bad for him but he takes up an enormous amount of screentime. What really hurts the film is that there are no likable characters. The two girls look naive and too trusting for most of this. They are also far too passive as they just wait for the guys to take revenge for them while they stay home. It’s pretty clear that the guys are getting nowhere fast.

As for the ghost, well she is fun to have around once she finally does make a move but even then it takes her a long time to actually take down Iemon. Also, right before becoming a ghost she did end up finishing off a baby so it’s not like they were shaping her up to be a hero either. The whole film is extremely drawn out even though it technically isn’t even a very long film. Mix that in with all of the characters being pretty bad and this was a recipe for disaster.

I’m not a fan of the old time aesthetic and this certainly wouldn’t change my mind on that. You will be left shaking your head the whole time and I wouldn’t even be able to blame you. The whole honor system just doesn’t work and I want the characters to be louder and more pro active. A guy like Iemon should never have gotten as far as he did. Even at the very end of the film he puts up way more of a fight than he should have. Is this guy secretly an absolute swords master or something?

He got too much hype and too much screentime. I’m rarely going to be able to really tolerate a film centered around a super unlikable villain without either seriously amazing supporting characters or a great hero to root for that takes him out in the end. A film like this one is just too depressing and dreary the whole time. It doesn’t leave you with any hope for the characters and is just not a fun one to watch. At the end of the day it forgets about the film’s main objective which is to be a fun and enjoyable film. There is nothing like that here.

Overall, A film like Ghost of Yotsuya was really doomed to fail from the start. The core plot is already not that engaging and you would need either a good amount of humor or something light hearted to balance it out. This film is taking itself deadly serious and so that means it is necessarily going to be a rather tough watch. You need to either have a really happy ending at the ready to balance the tough journey or for the villain to start getting his just desserts at a much earlier time. If you aren’t able to do either of those things, then the film is always going to be in a rather rough spot. There isn’t really any way around that. If you want to watch an authentic horror title, check out Godzilla instead.

Overall 0/10

Blue Beetle Review

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It’s time for the big origin story for the Blue Beetle. This guy got a pretty big push in the 2000s and I dare say it worked since he has remained as a well above average character in terms of popularity. The movie works pretty well as an origin. You’d probably like for some of the characters to show a bit of urgency when things are getting real but the action scenes are on point and the special effects are really good.

The movie starts by introducing us to Jaime who just finished school and now he’s ready to get a job. Unfortunately it won’t be so easy and he finds out that his family has been through a whole lot of hardships while he was gone. He has always wanted to support them but it’s not so easy to just get rich. Well, his sister lands him a job but then gets him fired from it on basically the same day. I suppose you could say that cancels out but Jaime steps in to break up an argument between the CEO Victoria and her nice Jenny. This causes Jenny to feel bad for Jaime and offer him a job.

What Jaime doesn’t know is that Kord Industries is messing around with alien technology. Jenny wants to stop this and so she gives it to Jaime, but it ends up bonding with him as a kind of symbiote relationship. Now there is no escape for Jaime as he becomes the Blue Beetle. The alien wants to murder people and keep Jaime safe while Jaime just wants to be an ordinary dude. That will be difficult though as the whole company is after him, led by Carapax who also has alien powers thanks to the exosuit. Can Jaime defend himself?

For starters the film has pretty much everything you’d like to see in a movie. It’s got a quick pace, good action scenes, fun characters, and some good humor. I pretty much knew it would be a pretty good film early on. That said, it’s also fair to say that the film plays it pretty safe and so it wasn’t going to be a great film from early on as well. It’s going with the basics as opposed to trying to really wow you. Nothing wrong with that, but in a way I feel like that’s also what hurt it at the box office. It wasn’t really seen as a “must watch”.

Jaime is a decent main character. He cares about his family and likes being a hero. He’s certainly not going to be going around murdering anyone or anything like that. So he is someone that you can count on. That being said, he can also be a little slow on the ball. He starts crashing out when he finds out that it will be difficult to remove the scarab but it’s a cool alien armor that gives him powers. Why would you want to ditch it? Far as I’m concerned that is a net positive.

Then when the company attacks his family, I think he should have been a little outraged. Instead he takes it all very casually and as a result his family is further injured and it all feels very preventable. I get wanting to be careful not to really hurt the humans too badly of course but when they are after the family then you should really be gearing up to fight back right? That just feels logical to me at the very least.

So all in all he’s good, but not a great character. He is fun enough to keep the film going though and does beat most of the other family members. They can generally be a little bit too annoying to him. They mean well like with Milagro getting him the job but of course getting him fired was really rough because of how unnecessary the whole thing was. I did like Rudy though. He’s the big conspiracy nut of the family who goes around acting crazy and embarrassing at all times.

Unlike the others it really works because that’s a big part of his character. He will never accept the obvious and will do whatever he can to resist the government. It is his complete focus in life and what keeps him going. So his jokes always tended to land. The weakest family member would definitely be the grandma though. The film tries way too hard with her and all of her big moments tend to fall flat.

As far as Jenny goes, the romance feels a bit forced here. I don’t see how it all worked out with her and Jaime considering they barely knew each other. Also there was a ton of plot armor with Jaime going out for a drive and bumping into her so quickly while she was being chased by all the gunmen. Like sure that’s probably not going to be a very likely event in most cases. I’ll give her credit for standing up to corporate though and as a character she was pretty solid. She had a lot of willpower to stand up to all that danger.

Then there is the company’s muscle, Carapax. He makes for a pretty decent villain but I would say he is a better villain than character. My main problem with this guy is they wait real long to try and make him sympathetic and honestly it doesn’t work. He spends most of the film trying to murder a kid. I’m not exactly going to be feeling too bad for him. His origin story is rough as they squeezed in multiple sob stories into one event but he still did end up being a bad guy in the present. His final scene was also really weak and didn’t feel necessary.

There’s not a whole lot to say about Victoria. She’s your average CEO type main villain. Yes, Lex Luthor has always been an example of one who works but he’s often the exception. Most of these villains just come across as really generic and that’s basically what happened here. She’s not bad but you won’t remember her for very long. Meanwhile the action scenes are pretty fun. We never really get to see Blue Beetle completely cut loose so that would be in a sequel but you can already see how he would be a total threat in combat. He just has so many options for good attack patterns here.

I also enjoyed the scarab. Generally he’s always been a really fun character and this one was no exception. The music is also not bad. I wouldn’t call it the next Guardians of the Galaxy or anything but the soundtrack worked well within the film. I will say that the big cliffhanger to the film is more on the weak side though. It’s not terrible but it’s also not particularly compelling unless you are a really huge fan of a certain character. Personally I like this guy quite a bit and even then I wasn’t particularly hyped. It just needed a little something more.

Overall, Blue Beetle is a pretty good film. While some may take my calling it a basic film to be a bit of an insult, I would say it’s just that the film was focusing on nailing the fundamentals. They managed to pull this off which isn’t always easy. The movie has very few real negatives and the most important thing is that it will go by really quickly. For example not all of the jokes land in the film, but it is generally funnier than it isn’t and there are enough jokes where you know they will land most of them. At no point does the film start to really drag on or anything like that. Instead you will be enjoying the action and the fun throughout. I’m sure the sequel would have been really good too.

Overall 7/10

Messiah of Evil Review

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It’s time for a zombie type of film and unfortunately I can assure you that it is not one of the good ones. There is no real escape for the heroes and while the film maintains a rather spooky atmosphere throughout, it never ends up taking advantage of this. What could have been a really intense cerebral horror film quickly becomes just another slasher to have to contend with. That is unfortunate but not entirely unexpected.

The film starts with a girl named Arletty deciding to look for her father. He left her a note saying not to do this as well as a whole book of notes but she doesn’t have time to read them in depth. When she arrives in town, the place is rather odd. One of the travelers at the gas station seemed rather off and then the town itself is fairly empty. There is an eccentric guy named Thom who is surrounded by girls and lives a life of luxury but it all seems rather empty. Arletty wants to continue on her mission but it does seem like the longer she stays here, the greater her risk of death will be.

Naturally she should have listened to her father’s note telling her not to follow him. That would have ended things right away and surely he wouldn’t have just sent her that notice for no reason right? She also should have read the whole book right away and planned for the worst. Now it’s not like there is a whole lot she could have done against the crazy zombies that would end up appearing but at least she would have been pretty well prepared. Instead she doesn’t really have a plan and always ends up being at a disadvantage.

She’s also a bit too trusting with letting Thom and his friends stay over right away. She doesn’t even know these people and odds are that they were crazy. Even by the end of the film Arletty is forced to take on more of a spectator role here as she can only wait until the inevitable happens. It’s always more fun when the protagonist can actually do a lot of stuff but in this case you could say that she was just a participant in a conspiracy that was much bigger than her. She wasn’t exactly the central focus this time.

Then we have Thom who is a bit of a space case. He tries to be calm and collected at all times but it can feel like a mask. He is quick to subtly threaten one of the girls when he feels like she has been too rude. Thom does well in the fighting near the end but ultimately it wasn’t really enough to turn the tides.

The characters are battling what is effectively an endless horde of monsters after all. Take one down and a few more will take the original’s place. It’s not like the main characters got a debriefing on this either so they’re going into the situation cold. The zombies are all cannibals, so the deaths are particularly gruesome. The film is going for max edge here and that’s really where you knew the film couldn’t come back from. It’s why I’m generally not a big zombie fan, it will usually lead to these kind of events which is hard to write around.

Since the heroes don’t really stand a chance, it also runs into the issue of the whole thing feeling futile. When the characters literally have no possible way to win, it is harder to get engaged into what is happening. If the film kept the threat vague then it might be able to survive on the atmosphere alone, but throw everything else in and you’re not likely going to come back from that.

The film has the cops show up at one point which made for an interesting addition, but unfortunately they are dispatched quickly. The way it was done was also unfortunate because it underscored that you could be turned into a zombie without being bit previously. I interpreted it as the red moon being able to transform anyone who is caught in its rays but of course then that makes things even more unfair. The villains also have a supernatural leader who has intense abilities of his own. That really doesn’t help the case for the heroes.

So the film ends up feeling rather mean spirited with the heroes having no chance and you just slowly watch as they end up dying. There’s not a lot of fun to be had with a premise like that and the film should have tried becoming an action title instead. At the very least, it does serve as a reminder that zombie films are not often going to be very good. If you see that as a genre then you know that you’re probably doomed.

Considering how dreary the film was overall, I’m surprised the ending didn’t have a little more pop. By the end of the film, we know that humanity is going to be destroyed but it’s handled in a very quiet way. I would have preferred that the invasion begins and that’s how the film ends. You may as well have things end in an exciting way like that right? It would certainly make the ending more exciting and memorable at least.

Overall, Messiah of Evil is definitely a film I’d stay far away from. There are no real positive moments to offset all the negatives here. The characters are pretty bad and the film just gets way too gruesome the whole time. It sets the tone early with the gas station murder. If the main characters could have done more damage and set this up as a more even fight then that could have helped. Have the zombies be traditionally slow or something. By allowing them to move at normal speeds like a human, it just makes them completely unstoppable. I don’t see how anybody is supposed to fight off powerful creatures like that.

Overall 0/10