Category Archives: Battles

Shredder vs Howard Aguello

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Howard Aguello is not your average fighter and he consistently proves why he is the toughest crook that you will ever meet. That may not be enough to defeat an evil Kingpin, but it gets the job done against an average opponent. The Shredder’s much better than Howard at hand to hand and he really shouldn’t have a problem claiming victory here. Shredder wins.

Hilda vs One Above All

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Hilda is back to get another win. The One Above All rarely manages to fend off his opponents to things will likely not go very well for him this time. Hilda’s demonic powers are enough to shatter a building in a single hit and her speed can easily keep up with high level demons. She’s had a pretty good start, but it could be a while until we see her return to the blog. Hilda wins.

Jack Sparrow vs Laa Laa

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Laa Laa is a formidable member of the Teletubbies to be sure, but she won’t be able to beat Jack Sparrow! Jack is a notorious pirate and he’s not the kind of guy who loses a fight…or at least not to a Teletubby. He still has his gun and his knife/sword so he’s properly equipped to handle the average opponent. This is how he became the Captain after all! Jack Sparrow wins.

Hilda vs Oga Tatsumi

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It’s time for Oga to get another win as he takes Hilda back down the rankings. She’s an exceptional swordswoman and she was actually able to stay ahead of Oga for a good chunk of the series. Still, none can stay ahead of the main character for long and one of Oga’s big thunder punches would be enough to win this battle. Oga Tatsumi wins.

Falco vs Pikachu

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I would actually consider Falco to be one of the stronger Smash Bros fighters. He’s not exactly top tier, (Sonic, Mega Man, Mewtwo) but he can hold his own against most of the other fighters. That being said, Pikachu’s definitely got this round. He’s a lot faster than Falco and the Landmaster won’t provide him with enough protection. An Arwing will be very helpful as well, but nothing can get past Pikachu’s Volt Tackle when you really think about it. Pikachu can dodge all of Falco’s attacks and then counter when it is convenient for him. Pikachu wins.

Hilda vs Captain Kirk

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Captain Kirk is back once again and he has now cracked 90 battles on the blog. He’s closing in on 100 rather quickly and then it’ll be time to find someone to replace him for these introduction matches. Hilda easily wins in her debut as a simple sword slash will be enough to take the Captain out of the fight for good. Hilda wins.

Mecha Godzilla 2 vs Howard Aguello

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Howard Aguello is the kind of guy who keeps on losing, but refuses to call it quite. Mecha Godzilla 2 may be a large Kaiju, but Howard is still ready to win this battle. He’s not going to back off just because of the size disadvantage and his power is matched only by his courage. Mecha Godzilla 2 wins.

Steelix vs Captain Kirk

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Steelix is a pretty tough Pokemon. I was always a little skeptical on the design since I think Onyx looks a little cooler, but Steelix has proven his mettle time and time again. Captain Kirk has proven that he can be a tough commander, but that’s not enough to really land a deciding blow here. Kirk just doesn’t have the proper equipment to win here. Steelix wins.

Jack Sparrow vs Dipsy

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Jack Sparrow is back and the Teletubbies continue their war against the pirate. Dipsy is up at bat this time and who can forget Dipsy’s previous battles on the blog. Dipsy always gives the match his 100% best, but it’s simply not enough. Jack Sparrow just needs to fire off a few rounds on his gun and it’s game over. Jack Sparrow wins.

Zeed Millenniummon vs Captain Kirk

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Zeed Millenniummon is another fighter who really shouldn’t be in the winless category so this battle will definitely shoot him up the ranks. Captain Kirk has been taking a lot of losses already so one more won’t hurt. He’s nearing 100 battles on the blog and this is a grim reminder to the Captain that he cannot win every battle with a gun and his hand to hand skills. Zeed Millenniummon wins.