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Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Review

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Now it’s time for Indiana Jones to edge closer to the next generation. This one introduces a new kid who can actually be rather fun at times. I’m not saying he’s amazing or anything like that but he does bring a lot of confidence and energy into the picture. This makes for a fun film as a result and I’d probably put it in second behind the original film. There is a lot of fun adventuring to be had here and the film moves at a good pace.

The movie starts off with Indiana being captured as always and he still escapes but not before getting betrayed by his friend Mac. Mac basically just wanted a lot of money and didn’t care who he got it from. Well sadly this means Indiana’s reputation is shot as people think he is a commie so he is forced to take a leave of absence from his teaching position. He prepares to leave the country but is stopped by a teen named Mutt. Mutt informs Indiana that there is one last job to do. Indiana’s old friend Ox has gone crazy after looking into a powerful gem and our hero needs to look into this. It may have something to do with ancient civilizations and it’s not like Jones was ever one to back off from a challenge like this. Can he still hold his own in a fight at his age?

The main thing you will be wondering as you watch the film is how Indiana hasn’t died of some kind of bacteria disease just yet. He’s constantly touching old mummies and dead bodies without any gloves or protective equipment. That seems like an absolutely terrible idea right? All it would take is one misstep and he is absolutely cooked. Ah well I guess he’s lucky. Unfortunately as always Jones looks bad in the romance department here. It’s retroactive in fact as we find out he got cold feet right before the wedding. It’s a terrible look for him. Also while it is played for laughs, we see how he holds very different standards for a random guy vs his son. His tune changes real fast.

Jones is generally more in control than in the previous films though so maybe old age actually helped him out this time. He knows how o handle himself in a fight as always but also isn’t getting outmaneuvered as much. I do think he was a bit easy on Mac towards the end though. When you have a traitor there can be no mercy at al, Mac never gave me a reason to actually think that he would be any good at all. The guy was willing to sell everybody out in order to get what he wanted and that makes him as evil as it gets. The first time Jones got to punch him was definitely satisfying.

Spalko is the first villain in a minute who is actually memorable and solid. She’s not relying on her feminine wiles to win a fight or anything like that. No, she can just straight up fight and gives Indiana a real battle the whole time. That’s what I want to see from one of these villains and she’s one of the more powerful opponents that we’ve seen in a minute as well. Ultimately her own ambitions were what got to be too much for her.

As for Mutt, well he’s a fun lad like I said in the intro. He’s always ready for a fight an his pocket knife comes in handy on more than one occasion. Without him the heroes would have really been in a bad spot. He isn’t always prepared like when he brought a knife to a gun fight but it’s also not like you would expect a teen to have his own gun just yet. Mutt is definitely a very rebellious character but written in an effective way so that he doesn’t come across as too annoying.

Marion shows up rather deep into the film and doesn’t look bad. I would just say that she is too merciful. She should want nothing to do with Indiana after what he did. It’s something these films never seem to learn when it comes to romance. Things don’t just patch together in an instant. There is always going to be some resentment and you can’t build a good relationship out of that. The film should have kept them as just friends or something instead. It’s also not like you really needed any romance here and could have kept us in suspense instead for a future film.

Indiana’s friend Ox tends to be super annoying though. It’s not fully his fault as the guy went absolutely crazy but that’s the case for almost the whole film. He can barely talk and when he does it is just cryptic nonsense. He’s basically more of a plot device than a character. The plot itself was interesting but I definitely would have cut him out. You just don’t need the guy. Meanwhile the film can’t help itself with the creepy crawlies and so this time you have a ton of Ants eating people. A bunch of them also get stomped with some really crazy ooze effects.

Was all of that really necessary? The ants design is pretty intense when you focus on how they actually look. I definitely give the film some good credit there but otherwise you really could have skipped those. Then we have the climax with some pretty big implications for the series. I fully expect all future films to completely ignore the ending though. Jones keeps finding some rather crazy stuff but then doesn’t tell the world or try to make it a big deal. He should be using this knowledge for the betterment of humanity but of course he will need to go slow or he will be jailed for conspiracy or something like that. You could probably do a whole film on Jones just trying to gather his bearings on all of the things that he knows now. The film’s effects were definitely solid.

Overall, Indiana’s dynamic with Mutt is actually rather solid. I enjoyed their scenes together and Mutt holds his own way more than you would expect from the average teen. Perhaps the film series is just good at handling kids and the rest. While the film admittedly has less of a sense of danger than the previous ones, it is still a lot of fun which is the important part. The opening scene involving a fridge was really quite solid as well and shows what a quick thinker he is. Not just anyone would have been able to handle that. Finally Indiana just loses less than he does in the other films. He’s still not always on top or anything like that but he is starting to act like the main adventurer he is supposed to be. Even if he is quite a bit older now.

Overall 7/10

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade Review

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Now we are on to the third Indiana Jones film. This time even his father gets in on the action. It’s definitely a considerable step up from the last film although I would give the first one the edge. The father gets some fun moments here and there but as a whole I do think he tends to take away from Indiana’s moments instead of bolstering them. If you’re up for another big adventure then you’ve come to the right place.

The film sets the stage early on with the goofiest intro scene as a young Indiana tries to outsmart a bunch of crooks but is naturally defeated. In part because his father doesn’t try to help at all. Well, in the present Indiana gets his revenge but when he gets home, he is told by his friend that his father has vanished. The last thing he did was send Indiana his diary which was focused on his quest for the Holy Grail. He must have been on to something which is why he has disappeared so suddenly. Indiana is on the trail now but can he find him? Additionally, will he be able to keep things professional with Dr. Elsa? Yeah…I didn’t think so either.

Indiana isn’t able to stay professional for 5 seconds as he immediately starts to flirt with her. If she was an enemy operative trying to seduce him it could not be any easier as he falls for her immediately. His dad’s in a real bind so you’d think that would make Indiana focus but here is no such luck. The romance here is quite bad once again. It’s played for laughs a bit as they both try to talk tough about how they’re not easy but even they don’t take that seriously. It also makes Indiana look really gullible like in one scene where he is given a heads up but all he can think about is Elsa. Not his best moment at all.

Fact of the matter is, Indiana is completely over his head. Before the mission he is told to trust nobody and yet he ends up showing Elsa the secret diary rather quickly. He also buys some rather terrible excuses. Yeah it’s no wonder why he is always being defeated in every film. This one may be his worst appearance overall but it’s close since he is constantly devastated in every film. The villains just keep their eye on the ball longer than he does which gives them a real advantage.

Meanwhile there is a little drama with Indiana and his father but there’s just not enough time within the film to really get started on that. It feels like a subplot you didn’t really need since it barely goes anywhere. Henry (The father) doesn’t change at all from the beginning of the film to the end. He still calls Indiana “Junior” to annoy him and ends up being more of a liability. He is just a really weak character the whole way through and unfortunately he also has Indiana’s weaknesses. That doesn’t put him in a good situation at all. With more self control maybe he could have solved the mystery already.

Indiana’s partner Marcus is unfortunately also at his worst here. He is even more oblivious than usual and has no idea what he is doing. I initially thought this would be his time to step up but it wasn’t to be. The guy is just not equipped for battle and doesn’t even know when it has begun. Forget calling him an asset to Jones, the guy is basically just a distraction at best. I liked him more in the previous films where he stayed home.

As for Elsa, well there’s not much to like about her. She’s very wishy washy the whole time and really doesn’t see the big picture. Elsa doesn’t stay logical during the case and lets her emotions run away with her. Not a smart move for someone with a big plan like this. I would also hit Indiana with the same complaint since he starts to make a crazy rookie move near the end which makes no sense with how he had just been acting a second prior. It’s like he forgot everything that had just happened a minute prior.

While the characters tend to all be really annoying, this was definitely a good return to form on the adventure front. You finally had a clear goal with different steps needed at every corner in order to get closer to it. This feels more like what you would expect from an Indiana Jones film. Additionally the film had good humor with funny jokes sprinkled in. It matched the first film more in that regard. Generally it is more light hearted than the first film without a doubt but without going too far. This is still a serious adventure after all and the writing is good either way.

We also got to see more of Professor Jones which is always fun. The guy is definitely a really well respected teacher so you can imagine how much everyone misses him when he’s gone. You get the feeling that the school probably wouldn’t put up with all of his absences otherwise. Although I guess we can assume that off screen he wins enough to have a very solid reputation as an explorer who gets priceless artifacts to the museum so I may be selling him a bit short here. Either way I’m still waiting for a film to dig into the human identity a bit more although this had the most screen time by far so I can accept that. Jones almost seems to have a completely different personality while at school as he’s a lot harder and more sarcastic about the legends. It would be nice if he always had that attitude during the film.

Overall, This was a fun movie. It’s a good adventure that goes by quickly while covering a lot of ground. I think there was some potential with the father son dynamic but the film didn’t really make full use of it at all. To a degree I dare say that you didn’t even need the father there. It’s not like he contributed a whole lot to the story anyway. The movie should have gone into the drama a bit more and tie in a satisfying conclusion. Ah well, the movie succeeds on the other fronts with the writing and humor. I appreciate how they made this one more light hearted. If you haven’t seen it yet then you definitely ought to.

Overall 7/10

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom Review

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It’s time for the weakest Indiana Jones adventure. This one definitely dwells a bit too much on the grosser elements of exploration as the heroes keep finding themselves in spots where the locals eat rather gross food options. Additionally the film definitely does decide to get a little extra edgy like having Jones be forced to take some corrupted blood. The end result is a film that doesn’t quite let Indiana Jones get as much adventuring in as you’d like.

The film starts off with Indiana trying to close out a deal he made with some shady individuals. They betray him but Indiana was ready and betrays them right back. His big mistake was in drinking some poison by mistake so he loses his leverage and barely escapes along with his life. His sidekick Short Round was definitely really helpful here but Jones is less pleased to have a lady named Willie follow along. The 3 of them are now stuck together and before they can go home, Indiana runs into a village where the kids have gone missing. Is it the work of a supernatural entity…or something a little more down to Earth?

Right away I can tell you that the romance in this film is quite abysmal although it’s not like the romance in the Jones films tend to be all that good anywhere. The third film actually gets even worse in that regard. Willie has no reason to like Jones after being tossed in this crazy predicament and she comes off as looking desperate. No worries, the same is true of Jones as well who really can’t ever seem to keep his mind on the adventure at hand. Perhaps that is why he tends to lose several times in every movie? He is constantly being outmaneuvered and manipulated by all of the other characters at every turn. He has to get lucky constantly in order to survive.

I’ll give him credit for doing his best to save the kids and help things end all right but as a character he can definitely be really annoying. In this film he is really outshined by his sidekick most of the time. Shorty saves Jones on multiple occasions and really does a lot better than I would have expected out of any kid. Usually the kids tend to be panicking or getting in the way but not this guy. He stepped up as needed and took a lot of risks. While I still tend to avoid having kids in film, this one wasn’t bad at least. He was probably even the MVP here.

Willie never really gets better even outside of the romance plot to be honest. She is constantly panicking and yelling the whole time. She has some valid points like I wouldn’t want to be forced to eat bugs either. Some kind of escape plan would be a good idea but at the end of the day you can’t always escape everything. Sometimes you’ve just got to take a stand but even to the end Willie was allowing herself to just be pushed around and go with the flow. Not the best way to really pave a path for herself.

Like I said at the start, the film definitely leans too hard on all the creepy crawlies. When characters aren’t eating them, they are in rooms covered in them or having to let them crawl all around. Crude humor probably isn’t quite the word for it so I don’t really know which term is right but it’s just overplayed. Meanwhile this is definitely known as a fairly violent Jones film for good reason. The deaths can get intense, then you have the gruesome drinking blood scene and of course Jones being used as a pin cushion.

While the climax gives us a really long action sequence, it actually takes a while to get there. In the leadup to that we have a whole lot of lore as things are being explained to Jones but the film basically takes a timeout. This could have worked better with a fun backdrop but of course it’s all about the bugs and the weak romance so you’re really just itching for the plot to begin again. Anything to get you out of the duller moments.

The villains are also on the very forgettable side. I’d say the villains from the first film were a lot more impressive. These guys are all insane cultists who fit all the primitive tropes well but do little to really impress you. They’re the kind of villains where you probably won’t remember any of their names or even much of their goals within a few weeks. They are obstacles for Jones to defeat and nothing more. I’m waiting for another big rival character like the guy from the first film. That would make for a much better dynamic.

Also by this point there is so much supernatural going on within the world that Jones needs to weaponize it. Clearly voodoo dolls work so using that to tie up his enemies would be intense. Of course first he would need to figure out how it works but this is all a lot easier once you know that supernatural things do exist. Likewise we had spirits in the first film. I know at the time Jones didn’t believe in the supernatural but surely by this point he does. He would be absolutely crazy to not have put the two dots together by now.

Overall, The Temple of Doom wasn’t particularly good. It’s also just a little too long for it to only be okay so there isn’t a lot of replay value here. To watch it again you would need a strong reason to do so. Additionally there is pretty much no screentime of Jones in his professor role which is a shame since I liked the whole dual identity. It feels like the film just sort of lost its way a bit here although it would rebound in time. I needed more fun tomb exploration and solving puzzles like a Tomb Raider game. That’s what I expect from an Indiana Jones adventure at least.

Overall 5/10

Spy X Family Code: White Review

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It’s definitely cool that Spy X Family got a big movie already. Many titles never get a movie or it happens at the very end but at this rate the series can probably squeeze another 1-2 films in before the series is over. It’s a fun adventure with a new setting to have fun in. The fact that it’s a movie also allows us to get a really dynamic fight scene in and Yor hasn’t been this relevant in quite a while. It works as a really solid stand alone adventure.

The film starts off with Loid taking down another villain group but his secret organization is not impressed and still says he will need to be reassigned from his current project. The only way to convince them otherwise is to make some progress really fast. He figures the quickest way to do that is by getting his daughter Anya to win the cooking contest and get the elusive Stella grand prize. Loid knows that the judge loves a certain kind of cake but it is only sold in another town so he plans a big vacation with his wife Yor and Anya to go try it out. This should be a piece of cake.

Meanwhile Yor finished her latest assassin mission and murdered her opponents but the next day she sees Loid seemingly kissing another woman. Her friends happen to be talking about infidelity and tell Yor to watch out for 3 big red flags. Sudden vacations, lots of presents, and new clothing styles. Yor is now on red alert for this big trip to try a cake. Is that the real reason for this trip? While her marriage to Loid may be a ploy, she has started to catch feelings and won’t let this slip away so easily.

Finally Anya is always really hungry and unfortunately she broke into someone’s luggage and ate their chocolate. What is even more unfortunate about this is that inside the chocolate was a tiny microchip containing a lot of important data and so now the government is after her. They need the data and aren’t afraid to murder Anya to get it. As Anya is just a child she doesn’t quite recognize the immense danger that she is in. Has she just doomed them all?

I would say that the 3 plots converge eventually but technically the 3 characters are together for most of the adventure. They just don’t know the specifics of what the other is doing for the most part. It makes for a fun dynamic and everyone gets something to do. It probably goes without saying that Anya has the weakest plot of the 3 though. For starters the whole thing is her fault since she should not have been eating other people’s chocolate. Yes, the eating part was an accident but she still opened the suitcase on her own which was not a good idea. We get a trippy dream sequence about using the bathroom as well which felt like something out of Teen Titans Go. Definitely not what I was expecting here.

Anya definitely means well but you can see why she is still just a kid. She isn’t quite prepared for this situation. I’d have traded in her scenes for Yuri getting to do a bit more. He looked great here as he was immediately ready to go save Yor when he heard that she was in a dangerous place. Yuri was ultimately stopped but it is the thought that counts. He’s the kind of guy you can really count on to help as needed. Maybe he will get more to do in the next film.

Loid looks solid as always. He is always trying to basically do everything on his own and does a good job there. He doesn’t want to make anyone worry after all and he’s trained for things like this. he can always handle himself well in a fight and thinks his next move through carefully. He may not be perfect at reading the other characters but who is right? At the end of the day he continues to get closer to achieving his objective.

Meanwhile Yor does really well here. She did well to take down the two guys attacking Anya near the beginning and her fight within the burning ship was great. The background was really intense and the animation got to shine there. Dealing with someone who is basically not even human anymore is no small feat and this is a fight where even Loid would have been in trouble. She really had to use her athleticism and smarts to take this guy down. Her opponent would probably end up being one of the strongest enemies in the series. It’s also a fight that really benefits from being in a movie where the staff can really show off with the animation.

As a whole the animation is quite solid here. It may not be looking like Dragon Ball or My Hero, but it still shines considering that this isn’t first and foremost an action story. It manages to contain action stories that would make those titles proud. The soundtrack is a bit more forgettable. I was expecting at least one big lyrical song to play during the climax but what we got was still decent. Soundtrack is just something that I think the movie could have worked a whole lot harder on.

Yor getting jealous and insecure may be a bit of a stale plot point already but it’s not like that is the sole focus of the movie. It would have been dicey if that was the case but the movie has a lot going on throughout. Anya aside, the humor tends to be good and the film is very fast paced. Bond gets the shaft here but it’s not like there is much you could have expected him to do here anyway. This is really a mission for the top two fighters in the business and they get the job done. As I said before, it’s an easy film for new watchers to get into as well since the basics of the plot are explained at the very beginning. If you’re up for a fun action/adventure title then you’ve come to the right place.

Overall, This was definitely a pretty good film. It was fun seeing the characters in action again and Yor definitely had the best moments here. Every time there was a fight it was definitely a lot of fun to see. At times the film could maybe be moving a bit slowly and you don’t really care about Anya’s scenes all that much. While the new setting helps make this feel like a film, I would also say it feels more like an extended episode compared to other big films like Demon Slayer and the DBS Broly film. So it may not be nonstop hype all the time but there was definitely enough of it going around where it still ends up being a quality title all the way. It’s a chance to see the characters in a new adventure never before seen in any format and that alone is worth the cost of admission.

Overall 7/10

Raiders of the Lost Ark Review

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It’s time for the original Indiana Jones adventure. It’s definitely been quite a while since I’ve seen this movie. Did it age well or has the film absolutely been devastated by the cruel march of time? Well, I can safely say that the film is pretty solid. It’s actually a fun adventure that may drag on just a tad but there is a lot going on. We get a good amount of fight scenes and chases throughout. I’d actually like to see more of Professor Jones in his day job since I like the idea of an alter ego like a superhero. I mean he doesn’t keep it a secret…but you know what I mean.

The film starts off with Indiana Jones on a big mission but he ends up getting double crossed by his travel guide and then being wrecked by his rival Rene. Rene has historically always gotten the better of Jones and this adventure is no exception. Rene just has too many tools up his arsenal. He’s smart, rich, and always one step ahead of the adventurer. Jones crawls back home where he is then sent on another mission to retrieve the Ark of the Covenant before the Nazi’s. The problem is that the Nazi’s have hired Rene and Jones has never beaten him before. He will need the help of his old friend Rene but she has not forgiven him for the dubious relationship of the past. Can Jones turn on the charm and win her over?

I would say the main adventure gets even worse for Jones because he has a clear step up over Rene since he knows where the key is which will help in getting to it. Unfortunately Jones forgets that Rene always likes to skip the adventure and just steal things at the end. Get ready to see Jones lose a whole lot of fights over and over again but he refuses to give up. Jones is no quitter, he will keep on fighting to the last. It’s why he is a professional. In a way it’s almost impressive how much plot armor the guy has because he should have died many times.

The worst instance is probably when he grabs a rocket and tries to hold everyone hostage. Rene calls his bluff and Jones surrendered. Look, you can’t surrender at this point. There’s no reason why Rene wouldn’t just shoot him there or be overruled by the Nazi’s where Jones would still be shot. You have to just go down with everybody at this point. Every time a hero decides to just throw in the towel I have to shake my head because that’s just a really bad idea. Jones makes a lot of questionable decisions though like leaving Marion in enemy camp where she might be tortured and beaten by the enemies because he doesn’t want them to know that he’s around.

Jones is a guy who really puts the mission first and the film makes that clear. He’s not here to make friends or anything like that. No, he’s here to do what he has to and live the adventurous life. For that reason the romance definitely doesn’t work at all here because there is no way Marion would forgive Jones, let alone get together with him. He showed how little he cared about her throughout the film. Honestly she should have just back stabbed him and ran away. It’s not like she is a great character either. She makes a lot of mistakes and can be annoying but she seems to have had a rather rough upbringing and was in a terrible situation so you can empathize there.

You certainly sympathize more with her than with Indiana Jones. Make no mistake, Jones is a fun character to watch. The film wouldn’t be the same without him but that’s definitely different than being a quality character. Meanwhile the rival Rene was good until the film inevitably made him girl crazy. It’s always a cheap way to suddenly make the villain look weak and give the hero a chance. Why make him so gullible? He was basically willing to throw everything away for a quick fling and that doesn’t make sense from a man who was so determined and strategic.

If he wants romance then he can find that on his downtime. The guy is rich so that should be easy. No, instead he messes around during a mission. Ah well, I’d like to see more of him and his rivalry with Jones in some prequels. There’s probably a whole lot you can do there, maybe even the reluctant team up. Now that would definitely be a fun way to go about things.

Naturally the film does well on the technical aspects. It looks good and the soundtrack is fun. The Jones theme itself has always been well known and it’s fun. Definitely has that heroic feel to it. Meanwhile the backgrounds look good and the fights are on point. They incorporate some nice humor into them as well like when Jones just shoots someone instead of trying to outfight them. The blend of action and humor works really well and that comes down to the writing which is really sharp. The script is good with all of the characters and helps to support the rest of the film.

At times the film can be surprisingly violent with how the characters die. The spinning airplane death and the trap near the beginning of the film definitely come to mind. This is definitely a movie where they aren’t afraid to really have characters bite the big one. It also underscores how Jones nearly dies on several occasions only to get bailed out. Can you believe he was ready to eat some fruit while in a dangerous territory? Yeah you definitely have to wonder how he survived this long. The film does keep things from being too extreme though which is good. It has a better balance than the next film does.

Overall, Raiders of the Lost Ark is a pretty good film. It has a whole lot going on and the fun script makes it go pretty fast. As I said it can feel a bit long at times, I would say particularly the part in the desert but not enough to really hurt the film or anything like that. It is also a long film in general so to an extent this may have been unavoidable. If you haven’t seen the film yet then it is a good time to check it out. The movie is known as a classic after all and you can see why that is the case.

Overall 7/10

Romance of the Three Kingdoms IV: Wall of Fire Review

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It’s time for another tactics title and unfortunately I am here to say that it is definitely not a particularly good one. As with the others that I’ve played recently, it takes away all the fun from the concept. The game goes too far in trying to be as realistic as possible and completely forgets about the fun factor. You always need a good balance in order to succeed here and the game completely forgot about that. It’s a shame since I think this could have really ended up being solid but in the end it definitely did not live up to the potential.

When you begin the game you get to pick which event you want to play through. Big history buffs will recognize the differences but to a casual player it all looks the same. Fun enough and all that but nothing to really hang your hat on. They may as well have only had one level for all the difference it would make. The levels can also be quite long as I managed to survive for well over a decade before dying and that’s considering that I had no clue what to do.

Aside from combat you can also make deals among the men, give them food, barter for items, etc. The game lets you simulate almost every part of a real war from back in the day. You definitely have a lot of control this way and I can definitely see someone getting a kick out of it but the problem is that everything takes so long. This is probably unavoidable for a game of this scale from back in the day but it also means that you wish it was not so intricate.

You want to be able to just rush in and start fighting but of course you are penalized for doing that. It puts you in a really bad position because you are meant to do all of the side parts of the game but in that case it will be forever until you see any real combat. The actual combat is slow enough as it is since you can barely move in each turn. It ends up feeling like a real RNG fest. I know a lot of it comes down to skill as well and I couldn’t figure that out either. So as a result everything ends up going sideways here. Not really the way to go about things.

At the end of the day this feels like a war simulation game but without any real hook. It doesn’t help that the graphics are not particularly good. They’re not awful or anything but they also aren’t testing the limits of the SNES architecture. You’ll forget all about them by the end, same with the soundtrack. It’s just very generic and doesn’t do anything to elevate the experience. At the end of the day it means that this is a game that will not withstand the test of time, not even by a little bit.

Throwing in a true story mode would really help for this kind of thing. Adding that in addition to the simulation mode would have been a really good idea. For starters it would give you a way to really identify with the characters as well as make you want to keep playing. There isn’t much reason to play through otherwise since there are no real cutscenes. You just have to absolutely love the gameplay and it feels like that would be a very limited audience. How many people actually enjoy that kind of thing? Give me a classic 3D beat em up instead any day. Then no matter what happens with my allies and the A.I., I know that I can do in and just start taking names. That’s a way more fun experience.

Overall, This is definitely not a game that you have a whole lot of fun with. It was too ambitious for its own good although even in the modern day I’m not sure how good a remake would be. If it can make things very cinematic then that could work but the key will be ensuring that every part of the game is fun. Counting up the money and distributing among the warriors doesn’t really seem like a good idea if you ask me. It’s just not the proper way to play a game and have a blast. Definitely skip out on this title if you can.

Overall 3/10

Batman Ninja vs. Yakuza League Review

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It’s time to explore the world of anime Batman once more and it’s still really impressive that the first Batman Ninja got a sequel in general. This one definitely has fun going crazy right from the start and I like how over the top it is. The rule of cool is definitely the highest priority for this movie and you know what? That’s not a bad thing! It’s important to have priorities and this means we get a lot of fun fights so you can’t go wrong with that.

The movie doesn’t waste time as within a few minutes we have Batman confirm that the multiverse is intact but things have changed in the timestream. There are Yakuza cyclones that spawn on top of Gotham and Japan no longer exists. Batman and Robin will have to jump across dimensions once more to fix things but this time they have to deal with an alternate reality version of the Justice League. This will not be easy…or at least that’s what Robin says. Batman is more optimistic and admits that defeating the Justice League will be a piece of cake. Well now it’s time for him to put that bravado to the test.

You can tell that the writers are big Batman fans. Right from the start he is shown to be incredibly confident, knowledgeable, resourceful, and powerful. The fact that he doesn’t bat an eye when going up against the Justice League is impressive. Batman isn’t phased by anything that happens during the movie, if anything he always seems to have expected this in one way or another. This is definitely a Batman portrayal that his fans will enjoy. He can basically do whatever he wants. Now that’s not to say that he’s invincible. He does get saved at different points but his confidence never comes into question.

Batman just appears as a natural leader which is really hype. His assortment of Robins also do pretty well. Red Hood is able to handle the Flash quite easily and then you have the main Robin not falling for any of Ra’s tough talk. Robin knows what side he is on and doesn’t waver. Nightwing and Red Robin get a lot of fun moments too. In general it’s just nice to have all of them showing up like this. The Bat Family is really a tough force for justice and by this point they are proving to be possibly as good as the Justice League.

Now obviously you do have to excuse a ton of power level issues for a fight like this. Obviously Flash should not be losing to a few guys in costumes and Superman should be able to easily end Batman. So you just have to turn your brain off and enjoy all the big action scenes. Fortunately there is a lot to enjoy with these fight scenes so that’s not really a problem. As far as the animation goes, well that part is a bit weak. The CG looks super off putting when you first start the movie. It gets a little more manageable as the movie goes on and you get used to it but yeah this is definitely not a top tier production.

While the character models are really rough, the film does a good job with the speed effects and the shockwaves after each blow. For example, someone like Superman actually does feel very powerful with all of those effects. Naturally it also does make the fights more intense as well. The energy effects look good too so you can really feel how intense this would be if it was hand drawn. Especially with the large amounts of action that this film had. The movie does have fun with different art styles for some gags though. The biggest one was definitely when the artstyle changed to look like the Superfriends and classic anime. That was a really good tribute.

In general there are a lot of good homages to different Japan/anime tropes. You’ve also got the moment where two characters are laughing together and then suddenly a fight starts. That was a really good cut with how fast the battle started. The film is fairly short but still gives you enough time to really know all of the characters. Sometimes the editing could be a little distracting though as you would be in one plot for 5 seconds, then switch to another plot for an instant, only to go back to the first plot. Sometimes it felt like you just didn’t need to switch that often because it was only an instant like that.

As always Gotham PD looks pretty bad here. The fact that the first film just happened but Joker and Harley Quinn are already out of jail is crazy. Definitely some commentary on Arkham going on there, I can feel it. Harley is a true wild card as always with how unpredictable she is. She really comes in handy at different points in the film though. Without her, it’s no exaggeration to say that the heroes would have been doomed. Even Joker really comes through in a pinch.

As for the Justice League themselves, they were mostly likable. Wonder Woman looks the best as she retained her good soul even in the new origin. It shows what a strong character she had as she would continue to be on the side of justice no matter how things changed. Her abilities also get a great deal of respect as she holds her own with the likes of Superman and the others. Definitely not an easy feat. Superman definitely bought into the Yakuza logic wholeheartedly. He made for a fun villain though and I dare say his character had the most fun with the new role.

Some of the others are basically just the same character but evil while he had a completely different personality. It worked really well and made the guy interesting. I also liked the contrast when we got a glimpse of the real Superman. Green Lantern was another fun character here as her abilities are always fun to watch. Somehow Harley Quinn gives her a good fight for a while there but otherwise she should usually crush Harley.

Aquaman is basically the same character. He’s okay but definitely tends to be more on the unreasonable side and never backs down. I did like the way that he controls the water directly instead of having to rely on talking to animals or anything like that. Using water directly is absolutely the best way to go about it. Then for the Flash, he gets the least to do I would say. His loss against the Robins also has to be the cheesiest fight of the film. You just don’t buy that for even half a second. There’s no way that the Flash would lose under any circumstances. He’s just not that guy.

Ra’s doesn’t have a ton to do here but I thought the character was handled well enough. He actually had a bit of humor this time around like how he trolled Robin with the sushi. He’s a guy with a lot of charisma this time who likes fighting for style points. It would help if he could fight a little more though but next to the Yakuza league he comes across as more forgettable. He’s really just a stepping stone for Batman to crush once the league is taken down. They were the ones with the bigger focus and he’s basically just a final boss to fill in the numbers.

Ra’s does make sense as the final boss here with messing with reality but he just needed more time. Finally the soundtrack was pretty fun. Some real fast paced tracks like when Batman fought Green Lantern. The lyrics were more on the weak side but I appreciated the beat. It was a lot faster than anything you would have expected in this time period so that was really appreciated. You should not have to worry about the timeline when coming up with good tracks. A good track is a good track no matter what the context, that’s something you’ll want to remember for future use.

Overall, Batman vs Yakuza League was a pretty good film. It delivered on having loads of action and just got right to it without waiting for any kind of intro. It’s bonkers in all the right ways. The short runtime also works as it could probably get exhausting if it was too long but this was the right amount. I would say I enjoyed it more than the first film and this one definitely has a whole lot of replay value. Just seeing the Justice League running around in their alternate costumes is a lot of fun after all. Id definitely be down with more films in this continuity. I’m guessing it takes a while to prepare the animation with how frantic the pace of the whole thing is but it definitely ends up being worth the wait. As long as you like Batman then you’ll definitely enjoy this adventure.

Overall 7/10

The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim Review

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This film had me shellshocked from start to finish. A Lord of the Rings film with good characters? A film that actually had an interesting story and good graphics? Even cool setup for the actual films to mess up later? What??? If you told me this was not a Lord of the Rings film initially but converted in post I would believe you because it is legions better than the previous films. Now it still does make its share of mistakes like some unfortunate animal violence but the difference is still night and day.

The movie starts off by introducing us to Hera who is the princess to the mighty Rohan kingdom. This kingdom is ruled by the mighty king Helm and his two sons Haleth and Hama are each formidable as well. These 4 members of royalty all have the blood of the gods within them which allows them to fight with superhuman strength and stamina. Helm has laid waste to entire armies in the past. Well, not everyone is happy about this and a rival province wants to have Hera married to Wulf to unite these kingdoms. They were childhood friends once but Hera points out that they are only friends. Wulf’s father dies in one blow to Helm when they fight and now Wulf has sworn revenge. He will destroy the entire kingdom. Can they stop him?

Right away I have to give major credit to the animation which is quite excellent. In particular Hera’s red hair really stands out by being several shades brighter than any other object in the entire film. She radiates main character energy the whole time and definitely does well as the lead. The battles look good as well and so this is a film that looks way better than I ever would have assumed. This animation would stay consistent throughout the movie. While the soundtrack may have been more forgettable, the animation more than makes up for this.

As I mentioned before, the film also isn’t a total bore fest like the live action films. I think in large part this also comes down to the animation because the film actually looks good unlike the others which all take place in dreary areas with no color. Everyone sounds boring in those films and the characters have no passion. There is nothing like that here as we have a fairly large cast that all have interesting personalities. The only real negative here is the animal violence which is unfortunately significant enough to notch the film down 2 stars.

Whenever you see a film that takes place in an old school fantasy land you can unfortunately assume that there will be casualties. In this case that means a few of the giant elephants running around. These beasts have a whole lot of power but are mainly still terrorized by everyone else. One is eaten whole by another monster which was quite brutal and two of them take blows to the face as one is stabbed to death. I definitely would have preferred for these beasts to not have been in the film at all. That would have been my preference at the very least. You could show the abilities of the various characters in other ways.

I will say that this is the first film in the series where the superhuman fighters actually feel strong. Yes, we know that several of the creature races are stronger than the others but in the live action films they all look like humans. Here we see Helm going toe to toe with a giant orc and you can feel his power. Likewise when he was taking down numerous foes in his warrior’s madness form. Those were impressive moments and likewise his two sons showed that they had far more power than the average fighter. It’s little elements like this which also made the movie more fun.

Hera is far more likable than Bilbo and Frodo. She knows what it takes to lead a country and never gives up. She comes out with plan after plan and also knows how to fight. Just because Hera was not picked to lead the country doesn’t mean that she slacked off on training. If anything she was glad not to have to rule the kingdom because this way she had her freedom. She didn’t agree to an arranged marriage or act docile at all throughout the movie. She kept on fighting and was only willing to make concessions to save her people. You couldn’t ask for a much better character than that. She may have been a little too curious at times and got the characters into trouble at times but that’s what happens when you’re an adventurer.

Her main defender was Olwyn, a powerful shield bearer from the past. Olwyn looks really solid here as she holds her own against the villains and comes in clutch to help Hera. This is the kind of fighter that you want on your side. She was still powerful even after decades of fighting which is not something that you can say for most characters. She was just in a league of her own and had a whole lot of confidence about her.

Meanwhile Haleth and Hama were also really solid. Haleth was always careful to look out for his sister and seemed to be a very reasonable fighter. He was the first to notice that they didn’t have as many soldiers as expected before the big battle and was the only one to take down one of the elephants in one on one combat. It’s a shame the way that he went out but it makes sense that the villains would use cheap tricks. In one on one combat none of the villains would have been close to his level. Likewise Hama was a great fighter although he seemed to be more of a long range specialist compared to his brother. Ultimately not investing in a stronger horse came back to hurt him but he never showed any fear in front of the enemy.

Helm was the most powerful character in the film and I appreciated that the film didn’t try to make him some faultless king. He had his issues like not listening to others and being quick to anger. The events of the film could have been way different if he had less pride and would listen to wise counsel. Of course this is likely also how he became King since you need a very strong will to pull that off. All in all I liked him. Yes he could be quite mean all the time but in his own way he was looking after the kingdom. The fact that he took out so many enemies amidst the freezing cold was really quite the feat. I dare say he would have finished the whole army if not for Hera’s rare misstep.

Frealaf was one character who suffered from Helm’s mistimed outburst. The guy was real loyal and having him around could have really changed the tide of battle. Perhaps they would have still lost as it wasn’t a huge squad but he was shown to be quite skilled and versatile with different weapons. I appreciated that his loyalty to the king and country were completely unaverred even after basically being told that he was useless. He had the mental fortitude of a strong warrior.

As for the villains, I can’t say as much for them. Wulf only does well in the film because of sheer numbers. It is made clear time and time again that they need dozens more men on their side to equal the fighting prowess of the heroes. Wulf basically loses every fight that he is in. He can’t defeat Hera in a straight fight, let alone someone like Helm or his two sons. He was struggling heavily against Olwyn as well. Wulf comes off as super whiny throughout the movie. You have to remember that his whole swearing revenge thing came out of a fair fight in which his father lost. There were no underhanded moves or anything of the sort. How are you going to be upset when you lose a fair fight like that?

Meanwhile he was expecting Hera to marry him because they were friends when they were kids? Nah that’s going far as well and even when they were kids he lost control of himself rather quickly. I ended up not liking Wulf pretty much at all when initially I thought he was going to be a really interesting villain. He services the plot well but that’s really all I can say for him. The guy also gets lucky on more than one occasion.

His general Targg was definitely wasted on such a man. Targg actually had good plans and words of wisdom. If Wulf had listened to him then he would have won the film several times over. Targg did look rather dumb in his last scene but in every moment before then he had looked good. It’s clear why he was well respected as a top general. The guy earned his station and ultimately just let his guard down a bit too soon.

That’s quite a lot of characters to develop in this film and so for a change I can say that the film properly utilized its long runtime. This was a movie that really needed the two hours and used it wisely. The film had a solid start, great setup, epic battles, and a satisfying climax. Like I said before, this doesn’t sound like a Lord of the Rings film. I was very impressed and I can say now that it’s time for more animated movies like this. Forget Bilbo, Frodo, Gandalf, and the rest of the realms. Lets do more prequels back when you had the age of the gods and more big fights like this.

Overall, This was a rather epic film. I can finally see why people like these classic war type movies. Now granted, for now I see this as an exception to the rule but what an exception it was. Honestly it would have been awesome if retroactively they made Hera the one to take down Sauron at the start of the first film. We did already have a cool twist with the name of the stronghold though so I can be satisfied with that. Yes, I highly recommend this to anyone looking for a solid fantasy film. It’ll really surprise you just how good this movie can get.

Overall 6/10

The Tunnel to Summer, the Exit of Goodbyes Review

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It’s time for a really great romance film. I often say that romance is handled rather badly in movies and so it’s always good to have an anime film show up to remind me that this kind of a story can be done well. The title is a real mouthful but it is a great movie through and through. Get ready for a lot of emotional punches to be thrown at you throughout the movie.

The film starts by explaining there there is a secret tunnel in this one town. When you go inside it, you are disconnected from time itself. You can reclaim anything that you have lost within that tunnel but it will cost you something in return…your time. 3 seconds in there is close to 2 hours in the real world. So that’s a great deal of time. If you trip or spend too much time in there, well you will have been gone for a very long time. You would have to be crazy to believe that this tunnel really exists….and even crazier to give it a try. You should not dwell on the past…..

BUT THAT”S HOW A NORMIE WOULD THINK!!!! Kaoru realizes that this is how he can bring his sister Karen back to life. She dies when they were children in a tragic accident that tore his family apart. His father is constantly drunk now and beats him while his mother left a long time ago. There is no bringing the past back to life but bringing Karen into existence might be able to help things. A new transfer student named Anzu shows up to class and she’s interested in the tunnel as well. Her goals remain a mystery to Kaoru but he is happy to have company. Still, can he really allow this girl to throw her life away? Going far enough into the tunnel to find Karen could mean that decades and decades of time will have passed. Possibly even hundreds of years.

First up one of the things that I liked about the film was that it didn’t try to really prove why you should not dwell on the past. Some films can be heavy handed about this but in this case the movie didn’t seem to have a problem with the goal itself. Kaoru needed some closure and so the tunnel was the way he would need to go in order to get it. When you have something that can change reality like the tunnel then I’d argue that you probably need to use it. Why wouldn’t you use something like that right? It just makes perfect sense.

The tunnel itself is certainly scary but we see how Kaoru really has nothing to lose. Yes he has a friend at school but there are no other serious connections. It only makes sense that he would be fine with tossing his life into the void. I’d probably have at least stuffed some money into a savings account so I’d have a nice sum upon my return but beyond that you might as well jump into the void. You could say that Anzu is the only real complication here since now he is slowly having a reason to keep on existing in the present.

Anzu is rather depressed and also doesn’t really have any friends or close family to keep her tethered to this world. That said, this slowly does begin to change as the film goes on. It leads to a really selfish move on Kaoru’s part though. I can definitely say that he made a huge mistake there and I wouldn’t blame Anzu for holding a grudge over that. She ends up being a really standout character not just for her tough personality in the present but for her loyalty and perseverance in the future as well. A lot of characters would have cracked or given in to rebounds sooner but not her.

I also liked that she stood up to the bullies right away in her school. That was a good way to solve the issue as opposed to just taking it or something like that. I always like when a character is guarded and tough to start out with. Anzu wasn’t accepting favors from anyone without a fight and she could defend herself. So that made for a high quality character. Meanwhile I also thought Kaoru was a really solid main character. Again I really appreciated his determination. He had a goal and was really determined to see it through. He didn’t waiver but he also gave Anzu the choice to turn back when he saw that she was having doubts as well.

Kaoru had to endure a whole lot over the years and he never let any of it crush him. That can definitely be tough to handle. Now I do think he should have ensured that he recovered what was lost and then went back to the real world. Based on how the tunnel works this should have been possible. I actually thought Anzu was going to be the one to save him by virtue of her “losing him” which would fit the criteria. Some pretty interesting ways it could have ended but the way it was handled was also good. We got enough repercussions where it didn’t feel like the movie had a cop out here.

It instead feels like an ending where none of the characters will have any regrets. It’s a super satisfying ending and yes it was a really well developed romance. I can say that it clears almost every romance I’ve seen in a very long time. The relationship took a while to develop and made sense with what they had gone through together. It’s just easy to root for. Meanwhile Karen may never have appeared in the present but she still left a good impact. It’s clear that she was a really good character and you can see why Kaoru missed her. It’s always nice to see a character like that who looks on the bright side of things and keeps the vibe light.

Kaoru’s father unfortunately got worse and worse as the film went on. Naturally it goes without saying that there is no excuse to get so drunk that you hit your son. It also sounds like this wasn’t the first time that he hit him. Then showing up later on with a surprise wife? Even the way he handled Kaoru when the latter was throwing up (Throwing him out of the room) showed how crazy he was. I was expecting some kind of redemption arc for the guy but it never happened. At least thanks to the way the ending goes, Kaoru shouldn’t have to deal with this.

The animation is pretty solid here. The film gets to really show off with the tunnel which looked really nice. The colors were striking and it definitely had a good air of mystery about it. I also liked how the flip phone looked which is always a retro design. The whole thing looks nice. The soundtrack is a little more forgettable but the lyrical song at the end is solid. The movie does well enough on the technicals.

Overall, I always enjoy a good film about time travel. It’s more appropriate to say this was about time displacement though as there is no actual travelling through time here. Regardless, you get the idea though. The concept was really interesting and the story is super engaging. The film has its share of sad and happy moments along with a great ending to tie it all together. I would definitely recommend this one. It’s a great title and you won’t be forgetting it anytime soon after you have watched the movie.

Overall 8/10