Category Archives: Live Action Movie Reviews

The Devil’s Rain Review

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Now it’s time for a film that definitely never made the transition into being a good movie. In fact, you had a sneaking suspicion that this was going to be awful as early on as when the opening credits played. That was definitely the first sign that things just weren’t right here. The movie never recovers from that and just goes into shock value moments in every other scene. This is one title you’ll want to avoid.

The movie starts with Corbis launching the opening strike on the Preston family. He desperately wants a book that they have and figures he will attack and kidnap them until they give in. Once he murders Mark’s father it is time for the lead to fight. Or at least you hope so but that doesn’t exactly happen here. Mark gets wrecked so then his brother Tom heads in to stop this guy. Can anyone succeed or will this group of nuts end up defeating everybody?

There’s definitely a ton wrong with this film so it’s almost hard to know where to start. I guess the first main thing here is the opening credits are really drawn out right from the jump. It’s all very dark and dramatic as you see a bunch of disturbing images that set the unfortunate tone of the movie. This is a film where the demons will really be getting a lot of undeserved wins and the humans don’t make it any easier on them at all. If anything they tend to come unprepared.

One of the opening scenes has the father showing up just to get melted down into parts. The effects are impressive considering how old this is which is at least one thing I can say for the scene. Unfortunately the movie is only just starting its descent into madness. Mark initially has the right idea since he shows up to Corbis’ place with his gun. Now there’s a few things he could have done to end the movie. One would have been to shoot Corbis right from the start. Sure the villain acted like it wouldn’t do much but later on we see that it is quite effective on these guys so taking the shot would have really been the right move to make. I don’t think there’s even a question about that.

Instead Mark challenges him to a battle of faith but the main mistake here is actually expecting the guy to play fair. Walking into this crazy parody of a church where he will be surrounded by other villains is not a good move. By this point it’s going to be way harder to actually get out. Even with a gun you aren’t invincible if there are enough people around so you shouldn’t be testing your luck like that. It will inevitably backfire and just put you in harm’s way.

There’s also one scene right before this one where he decides to have a cup of water. Why even take that risk here? Well, he finds that it’s bitter and….then keeps drinking anyway. There wasn’t any logic in that scene and the whole confrontation with Corbis wasn’t written nearly as well as it could have been. Once Mark is captured then you have to sit through a ton of drawn out scenes as they break him physically and mentally. He definitely got a really raw deal here.

Then you have Tom who shows up to become the true main character and I can’t say that he was great either. At least he tries to call in the sheriff but naturally the guy doesn’t believe that there is a threat so Tom has to go in with his wife. Unfortunately they weren’t super prepared for this and don’t fare so well against the ghouls. There’s also a research guy who is with them and at least knows enough to say they should break the jar but even then he isn’t fast enough to do it himself. Nice idea but you should probably drop it before you say you are going to do that.

As for Corbis, well the guy is crazy evil but there’s not much more to him than that. He’s effectively the personification of the Devil or at least one of his higher ranked minions and even gets to show off his beast form. The film wasn’t afraid to throw in some extra effects and all but it’s just squandered on a film like tis. The whole movie is very dreary the whole time. I don’t think there was a single happy scene in the entire film which is really crazy to think about.

You know that the heroes don’t stand a chance from the start and the villain are really toying with them. From what we see here there is no reason they couldn’t have just stormed the house to grab the book and murder everyone. In a way they probably just enjoyed picking them off one at a time. It was rather easy for them to seemingly take over the whole town and the rest of the family too. You have to wonder how nobody noticed that people were vanishing like this. The Sheriff clearly didn’t know this was going on so maybe the members were taken from different areas or something? It’s too bad because maybe he could have helped out. For all their tough talk, the villains were not bullet proof so you should be able to just keep blasting them until they’re dead.

Overall, The Devil’s Rain is just as bad as you would expect from the poster. If you had not seen the poster you would figure this out almost immediately either way though once the credits start playing. It’s the kind of movie where there just doesn’t seem to be any point to it. It’s trying to be as dark and disturbing as possible but to what end? The film shows you that the whole area has descended into being evil and you can only delay the inevitable by trying to run. It’s not like a suspenseful horror either where you get engaged with the struggle. The whole film has an odd vibe where it’s all like an abandoned ghost town where there is no backup for miles but that also means no real lore of backstory from the side characters. Just the basic demon stuff. The heroes weren’t smart either and I still can’t forget the scene of just drinking out of the evil water there. Didn’t make any sense when you’re here to fight off a murderer. Why risk drinking at all? Just get the job done and then head back home. Either way the movie’s biggest flaw aside from being awful is that there weren’t any good scenes here. There weren’t any moments that would make you think “This was hype” at all. Hopefully there will be no remake or reboot for this and we can just let this one be forgotten.

Overall 0/10

The Intruder Review

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The Intruder is almost like a return to form for horror titles. You’ve got the very unlikable main cast, the insane villain who just openly goes around taking people out, and nobody decides to just leave. What you end up with is a film that will have you annoyed at the main characters and it never gets to the point where you would call it a good movie. So this one ends up just losing out.

The movie starts out with Scott and Annie deciding to buy a house. They are fairly well off and could have stayed in the city but Annie just wanted somewhere quieter to start raising a family. While Scott isn’t too impressed with the first house they see, Annie likes it so they end up buying it. Unfortunately the previous owner Charlie doesn’t seem thrilled about this. He keeps on showing up unannounced and acts like it is still his house. He is openly antagonistic towards Scott and acts overly familiar to Annie. Initially this is just something that irritates Scott but then he starts to realize that this guy may actually be dangerous. Now what can he do about it?

It’s always rough when you don’t go with your gut because then you end up regretting everything. From the start Scott realized that this didn’t seem like a very good idea but he went with it because Annie really liked the place. Charlie started with the insults early on too but Scott figured he could power through it. The issue is that Charlie is always around while Scott is back in the city all day so he is rarely at home. This already puts Scott at a disadvantage in making sure Annie is okay.

Then unfortunately we find out that Scott has also made some massive mistakes in the past like cheating on Annie. You’d think he would really be on his best behavior now but then he also starts flirting with the cashier at the ice cream parlor. Why would you even do that? His excuses were really weak at this point in time because Annie was right that his dialogue was way over the top. Further, it seems like he was about to cheat on her again but fortunately she called him in time.

So the film goes out of its way to make Scott look bad here and naturally this ends up making it all the easier for Charlie to move in. It’s still no excuse for how oblivious Annie is though. She seems to not notice at all how Charlie is acting towards her and her excuses about it aren’t very good either. She says that he’s very lonely and everything so they should just let him keep showing up like this. Even if you feel bad for someone, that’s not an excuse to just have them be showing up all the time.

There are even some cases where she is the one making the situation worse like when he shows up with pizza or to talk about the lights. Charlie’s about to leave when she calls him back so they can hang out. I know she’s still in the “just being friendly” stage but it’s still a really bad idea no matter how you slice it. She doesn’t know him at all and Scott’s not around. Seems like an unnecessary risk to me. Both Scott and Annie can never have a reasonable discussion about any of this either since there is just too much ammo flying all over the place.

It’s why the movie has them making these mistakes in the first place since it evens out and then they can’t really talk about the other. I found that to be a bit lazy though. As for Charlie, he could have been better if they just focused on the “he’s insane!!” part. Have him initially start out as someone who is harmless and just wants his house but gradually gets more sinister as the main characters act more aggressively in banning him from the house. Then you have the intruder aspect and things get serious.

Instead the film starts to focus more on how Annie is Charlie’s goal and as soon as the villain’s motivation goes there you know that it’s all over. That kind of villain’s always going to be just plain awful in the end and Charlie’s no exception. The dynamic could have been so much better otherwise but they blew it when that happened.

The main characters have a friend named Mike but he’s just awful as well. Keep in mind that Scott and Annie just bought this place. It’s a super big house with tons of bathrooms and the guy still feels the need to go all over the backyard. That’s just completely unnecessary and the same goes for dropping cigarette butts all over the place and extinguishing the fire on nearby plants. It’s like Mike’s going out of his way to ruin the place. It’s portrayed more that he’s just not very smart and tends to be crude but it is so exaggerated. Any scene with him in it was pretty awful.

At least The Intruder does have a lot of jump scares though. Charlie is always running around inside of the thunder flashes so you know that he’s watching. The characters never notice but you like to think that they would if they were more on edge. Charlie is always a few steps ahead of them so the one time the heroes have him on the defensive you wish they could do more about it. For example, at one point they stab him and he hits the ground hard. You’ve got 3 options here, restrain him, keep stabbing him, or drop the weapon and tend to your wounds while giving the guy your back.

Naturally they choose option 3. Look, if someone’s broken into your house and he’s clearly dangerous and armed, option 2 is the best bet here. Make sure you’ve put him down for good and keep it moving. Instead in every horror film it feels like the characters think 1 stab will be enough somehow so they clearly haven’t watched the news enough. These characters really did not handle any of this very well and the examples will just keep coming as you watch the movie.

I won’t even bring up how Mike could have done better since we’ve established that he’s just not very bright. Would have been nice if he could have at least remembered to pick up his cell phone and dial as soon as he saw Charlie though instead of making a lot of noise and running. I also blame Scott for falling asleep. By this point he knows how big the danger is so he should be calling the cops and doing a number of things instead of leaving it all to Mike. Going even further back, why did Annie go home at all? By this point it’s patently obvious that Charlie’s out to get them so letting her go home alone while he will be stuck in the hospital for another day doesn’t make any sense.

Overall, The Intruder will show you how to mishandle a situation every step of the way. From buying the house where the owner runs around with a shotgun and insults you right away, to splitting up and not taking anything seriously, these characters don’t make it easy on themselves. With a better villain this could have ended up being a better film but it just wasn’t to be. Ultimately I would give a hard pass to this one. While the end credits have a very stylistic approach which is nice and the ending to Scott’s character arc was handled differently than what I would have expected, I wouldn’t say there is any reason to recommend this film. The only good part about it is that the atmospheric horror can be good at times. Lots of solid visuals and jump scare moments but that’s not enough to recommend an entire movie. Everything else holds it back.

Overall 3/10

Bloodshot Review

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Bloodshot is one of those origin stories where not a lot of people know about him. At the very least I wouldn’t call him mainstream just yet and since the film didn’t knock it out of the park, it’ll probably stay that way. It might have done better if the trailer had not revealed the big twist early on but it’s always tough deciding what should and should not be in the trailer so I won’t blame them too hard there. I thought it was an enjoyable film, one that probably should have been longer but it was fun.

The movie starts with Ray completing another government mission. He’s proven to be one of their best warriors at this point and afterwards he goes on another mission. Unfortunately this one doesn’t go well and his wife is kidnapped and murdered. Ray is murdered shortly afterwards but is revived by a mysterious group led by Dr. Emil. Emil tells Ray that he now has superhuman abilities since his blood has been replaced by nanites. He can heal extremely fast now and can hack just about anything. Ray decides to use these abilities to locate his wife’s killer at any cost. Can he pull this off?

One annoying thing right off the bat is how Ray’s fighting style gets super sloppy after he has his powers. Remember how he was an expert government agent who would go into dangerous situations and always left with his life intact? Not anymore. Now he jumps into every single bullet and trap possible. The reason isn’t just that he’s lazy but also because he wants to strike fear into the villains. Fine, that’s fair enough but it’s still no excuse to put his abilities to their limits. He nearly does push himself too far as he gets blasted a lot. Imagine if he had actually died against the random thugs in the beginning? That would have been extremely embarrassing.

Ray’s a good character beyond that but it did make every fight annoying. Ray is a very determined guy who will stop at nothing to avenge his wife. The scene where he immediately hacks all of the tech around was very impressive and he didn’t waste any time in using his abilities. He had his priorities set from the start and nobody was going to stop him. So that’s the best quality in him and that makes for a good lead. Where he falters is in the romance angle.

The film’s romance is quite weak from start to finish. So Ray’s just lost his wife and he’s already rebounding with KT? That’s pretty bad tbh. I give characters a lot of grief even after it’s been a few weeks but we’re talking 1 day. That’s insane. It then makes the romance scenes with his wife in the beginning look worse since you realize how easy it is for that bond to be broken. All of this adds up to hurting Ray for sure.

I respect him as a great fighter and it’s always fun to see him take names but off the battlefield he struggles quite a lot. Then there’s the main heroine KT who is not on the right side for most of the film but at least there is a decent reason here. When you can’t even breath without tech support and you know that someone has direct access to it, that will always make things a little slippery. You want to be careful not to rock the boat all that much. At least she speaks up more than the others and she can fight when needed. So in the end I thought KT was solid.

Emil is your classic scientist type so there isn’t a whole lot to him. I did think his acting was funny when he has to go through a script. Emil has a lot of fun with it and so I’ll also give him credit for his determination. The guy has a goal and will do anything to achieve it, even if it means reading the same lines a lot of times. Not just anyone would be able to pull that off.

The other villains were really on the weaker side though. None of them were particularly impressive either with their designs of personalities. You had the one insane guy who likes to gloat when the opponent can’t fight back. He seems to really enjoy his part in resetting someone to a rather disturbing extent. One thing’s for sure, you don’t want to be friends with this guy. Then you have another villain who’s heart isn’t really in it but he helps the villains out anyway so I’m giving him 0 credit for that. I don’t care if you’re half hearted about it, if you’re a villain then you’re a villain. Don’t now what else to tell you on that. Voicing some doubts doesn’t help as some kind of consolation victory.

Wigans is the resident genius in the film. He does have a counterpart in the base but you could tell that guy was out of his league from the start. It’s too bad they couldn’t interact though as that would have been fun. Wigans is the kind of guy who is always talking fast to try and stay on top of the conversation and keep everyone confused. It’s fortunate that he knows how to code so well since otherwise I could see someone bumping him off. The humor works well enough here although I’d say his rival was better in that department. So what the rival lacked in skills he made up for here.

While I give the action scenes a thumbs down, the effects are solid. I always like seeing what regeneration looks like in a film and this one definitely got that down to a fine art. The regeneration looks really sharp and most importantly, practical. The nano limits are also established well and visually you can tell when the main hero is starting to weaken. You like to think he’ll be stronger for the sequel if he has to fight other powered fighters and the ending pretty much confirms that so you don’t have to worry about it too much.

Now my main issue is that one part of the film doesn’t get enough time so it’s time for the spoiler paragraphs. Skip the next two if you haven’t seen the film yet and then come back to them later on. It’s a really interesting plot dynamic so if you don’t know it yet you may want to keep it that way. Remember, skip the next two paragraphs and then you’re all set.

So we find out that Bloodshot’s whole origin here is a lie. His wife wasn’t murdered but the group have been putting fake memories into his head. They then change the identity of the person who “murdered” the wife and in doing so they have turned Bloodshot into a murder machine. It’s sort of like the Weapon X program. So the first batch of scenes with Bloodshot escaping the group and enacting his revenge was staged every time as they wanted him to escape. We see that they have been doing this for a very long time. The villains just read their scripts in the same way each time to ensure we get the same results.

It’s all quite brilliant if you ask me but my issue is that we only see the last one that works without a hitch. I think this should have been the second or third attempt. We could then get a montage of this happening more and more. The reason for that is it would help really sink in the fact that they have been manipulating him from day 1 and how traumatic that is when he wakes up. Actually seeing this more than once would have been very helpful for that reason. Not saying we need to see the whole sequence but at least good chunks of it each time.

Overall, Bloodshot may not have been a great movie but I did think it was good. It handled the origin story effectively and gets you hyped up for what could be in the universe. I think the series should stay away from the romance although that’s probably a little too late at this point. That’s one of the angles that holds it back a bit and one part of the origin should have definitely been longer. I also think you could do a lot more with the fight scenes. Don’t have Bloodshot act as a complete sponge the whole time. Yes, he can take damage but he shouldn’t be pushing it like that or he could end up losing to someone weak.

Overall 6/10

Night Watch Review

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Night Watch makes for a pretty interesting watch after Gaslight. After all it seems to be going in a similar direction but is it really leading up to the same conclusion? Well, part of the fun is in watching it get there. It is certainly better than both of the Gaslight films but I still wouldn’t call it very good or anything. It certainly goes a bit far in the ending and it’s one of those films that doesn’t have a particularly likable cast. Some clever dialogue and moments do keep it from being a bad film though so ultimately it would be right in the middle. “Mid” you could say.

The movie starts off with Ellen and her husband John having an ordinary night but then Ellen makes the mistake of heading near the window during a dark and stormy night. She happens to see a murder in the window next door and quickly calls him over but by the time John gets there the body is gone. They call the cops who do a thorough inspection of the house but find nothing there. The cops think Ellen may have been imagining it. After all, it was dark out and the house is a fair distance to be watching in those conditions but Ellen does not drop her claim. Perhaps the next door neighbor Mr. Appleby knows something about it. He has been planting quite a lot lately……

So at its core this is a classic murder mystery only you aren’t sure if Ellen is correct here. She is in a fragile mental state due to some things that happened in her past. The movie goes into it but she had a breakdown at one point so this could be some kind of projection there. It doesn’t help that she keeps calling the cops over and over again to the point where they start to complain to John. None of the searches turn anything up so it’s not like they have much evidence anyway. The film is the embodiment of “The Boy Who Cried Wolf” when you think about it.

Inspector Walker is a fun character though. You have to give him credit for doing his due diligence because he does inspect the house multiple times. He certainly put in the effort even if it didn’t turn anything up. He even posted some guards to watch the place throughout the night. Even he has a breaking point with how often he has to go over to the same house. Perhaps arresting Ellen for a night for using up the police lines would have made some sense there. Not that you want to punish someone for reporting a crime but when it gets this excessive it has to be something that you consider right?

Now to Ellen’s defense, Mr. Appleby is certainly as suspicious as possible. I said that the cops never found anyone in the house but I should amend that to say that they found him there once. His excuse was that he was curious since Ellen kept claiming there was a murder. His other suspicious action was deciding to plant some new bushes/plants right after this supposed murder. Nothing wrong with gardening but the timing was certainly very interesting eh? He makes for a fun character. Someone who is rather defensive but who wouldn’t be when they’re a murder suspect.

John seems reasonable at first but gets gradually worse as the film goes on. He certainly acts like he’s making the right moves and defends Ellen in public but he is severely lacking in willpower. Lets just say that he makes all of the wrong choices which don’t bode well for him. You can say the same thing for Sarah who’s just not a very nice person. Since Ellen is surrounded by these characters who aren’t that great, it’s not particularly healthy for her recovery.

As for Ellen, well she is jumping at shadows after a point with how she keeps on calling the cops. At one point she apparently called over 10 times in one day which is really a whole lot. At that point since you know the police can’t do anything you’d think she would give it a rest. You aren’t likely to forget her as the lead though.

The climax gets surprisingly violent as mentioned earlier so you’ll want to watch out for that. The rest of the movie is really mild and laidback which is why this can come as a surprise. As for the twists at the end, well the film handles it really well. You definitely look back at the rest of the film in a different light and it all lands well. I would say I don’t think the plan will be as successful as the murderer expects though. This is something that only works for a short while, maybe a day at best. I think after that the cops will make a move and at that point someone’s going down. Now, whether they get the right person or not is really up to the viewer to decide.

I think they would pull it off though. Getting proof might be tougher but you have sufficient motive and things are very suspicious once they add it up. They may also get someone else who wasn’t in on the actual murder but knowing about it is almost as bad so game over there. It’s all head canon as the film ends early so you get to decide what happens next. It’s an open ending that works well enough. The film lives up to the suspenseful atmosphere it built up at the start.

Overall, Night Watch probably won’t play in quite the way that you expect and so in that way it really works as a solid mystery. It would be nice if we had more characters to really root for though. I liked the Inspector but he’s hardly the main character or even the main secondary one. I expect much like in a horror film they probably don’t want to make the characters too likable or you start to feel bad for everyone so it’s always a tight rope there. If you’re up for a suspenseful ride then this could be the ticket for you. It may have a bit of a slow build up near the middle but the film’s always doing enough to keep you interested for the ending.

Overall 5/10

The Last Wave Review

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The Last Wave is certainly a strange film. It doesn’t mind lingering on a shot of the sky or an empty house for a little while. There’s always a mysterious humming tune playing and so this helps to keep you off balance the whole time as you don’t know exactly how this is going to play out. It’s all just a little too dragged out though which hurts the film’s momentum.

The movie starts with a powerful hail storm striking a school and knocking one of the kids for a loop. We then see a bunch of guys at a bar and things get out of control when one guy gets drunk and then ultimately drowns. The group at the scene of the crime are taken in on the charge of murder. This leads us to our tax expert named David who is picked as their lawyer for some reason. Seems kind of random but David never turns down an assignment. He tries to make a connection with the main guy named Chris but he’s super vague. Chris also brings in his mentor Charlie who is also quite mysterious.

These two are from a tribe with supernatural customs including a bone that you could point at someone to make them die instantly. David’s best chance is if he can prove that they murdered the guy in this supernatural fashion and since that would be considered tribal law, the group could get off as being innocent. Unfortunately proving tribal law will be difficult especially since Chris and the others won’t play ball for some reason. Why are they keeping so many secrets and why is David starting to have a lot of visions? The whole thing feels rather strange so he is going to have to find answers for that.

From there we get a lot of scenes with David thinking or wondering what’s going on. Naturally the people around him either start to think that he’s crazy or making a mistake. His wife isn’t thrilled about this as Charlie even appears outside of the house in the dead of night and really spooks her. She didn’t exactly sign up for this but props to David for confronting Charlie the next day.

Unfortunately he doesn’t really get any answers out of him. Charlie just spams the “Who are you?” card over and over again. David has a partner who also thinks this is insane and that David should stop trying so hard. The case looks open and shut so there might not be anything he can do, especially when his own clients refuse to help out and seem to be on some kind of order of silence. More tribal law perhaps?

Throughout the film weird things are happening with the weather too. You have black rain falling from the sky which people claim to be pollution but it seems weirder than that. For example, it only starts falling in a small area as opposed to falling everywhere. It’s a bit hard to explain that. One thing that also helps David start to believe that are his visions where he starts seeing things that he shouldn’t even know about.

There’s a court scene in the movie which is fun as David tries to present supernatural evidence. The court actually considers it far more than you would typically expect. It definitely makes for a surreal scene as is the rest of the movie. While I’m skeptical that things would play out like this…at all. It still made for a fun moment as I always like to get a court scene thrown in.

While the movie is mainly focused on being super strange and doesn’t jump into the realm of action too much, the climax suddenly gets a little intense. We get a little wrestling as David turns into Indiana Jones and really investigates the cave. The whole thing turns into a bit of a conspiracy you could say as the tunnels go throughout the city. This leads into a pretty solid ending. You can take the ending in a few different ways but I consider it to be “Game Over”. There’s no coming back from this and in a way the futility of David’s whole adventure hits him all at once here. It’s like he never stood a chance.

The most annoying character in the film has to be Chris though. David’s trying to help him and the guy remains cryptic and completely unhelpful for the entirety of the film. You’d think that he would step up at least once, but no he never does. Even by the end he just ditches the main character because it got too dangerous. Then you have Charlie who seems completely insane. That could make for a good villain but he’s not good at using his abilities at all and just appears to be completely ineffective in the climax. Surely with his abilities he could do much better than how he performed here.

The Last Wave does a good job of being strange but where it loses me is in how long it’s got to be. We’ll have a conversation with David and Chris that takes eons as they have to have a dramatic pause at the end of each word and then just stare waiting for the other person to slowly have a response. These artificial delays occur for every conversation in the film involving Chris and the other characters. A random scene like the bathtub overflowing will take several minutes as David slowly walks up the steps and ponders his life as he turns it off.

So that does bring the whole eerie feel of the movie across but it also means that the pacing is simply dreadful. The events take too long to happen which hurts the replay value and even the experience of making it to the end. If you cut out how long some of these scenes were then this would easily jump up a point or two. Maybe if the payoff was even bigger then this would have gotten another point that way as well. There’s a lot to interest you here but it just takes too long to get there.

Overall, The Last Wave is a film that’s right in the middle. It’s far too drawn out to be good but there’s enough interesting angles here where it’s not bad. If you want a film that’s very original and off the normal path then this is the one to check out. It is difficult to make a film this strange without being nonsensical or making big mistakes so the film deserves some credit there. The ending is also very memorable so you aren’t likely to forget it anytime soon.

Overall 5/10

Vacancy Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s definitely a common trend that in a horror film you have to make it so that nobody is likable. This movie follows that formula to a T but of course that also ends up being a bit of a weakness when you think about it. If you threw in a bunch of really good characters here then ultimately that would only serve to enhance the movie right? Vacancy is an interesting idea and while the execution may not have quite fit the bill, it does stand out a bit from the average horror title.

The movie starts off with David and Amy on a long drive. Unfortunately they’re lost at this point. David doesn’t think that they are but Amy is convinced of it. Then their car seemingly gets damaged when they have to make a sharp turn to avoid a raccoon. David made the right choice in dodging it but Amy gets on his case about the whole thing. She is certainly shown to not be particularly compassionate here. She keeps on heckling David until they finally manage to stop at a motel. The only thing is, they’re now surrounded by a few crazy assailants and they’re in the middle of nowhere. Amy dropped her phone outside and they parked the car a few miles away from the motel. Can they possibly escape this predicament?

The first chunk here is really to set up how the characters are absolutely getting themselves into a bad situation and unfortunately a lot of that really falls squarely on Amy. She gives absolutely no supportive effort to all of this and just takes shot after shot despite being the one who was sleeping for a while. Deciding to cut an apple while in a moving car just seems reckless as well and naturally she gets cut. The film really goes out of its way to make her as annoying and unlikable as possible.

So by the time she drops her phone outside you almost end up blaming her for that completely whereas otherwise you might have cut her some slack. It’s definitely convenient not to have the phone. Granted, I like to think the villains have a jammer somewhere but otherwise the two main characters could have just run into the forest and it would have been a decent idea since they could call the cops and have them track the GPS. Otherwise going into the forest is too risky since they could be lost forever. Still preferable to this situation I have to imagine though.

David’s a much better character from the start as he has a decent attitude about this. He’s trying to stay calm and confident despite being extremely tired since he’s effectively been up all night. Additionally David is the first one to realize that something isn’t right with this Motel and figures out the danger before it’s too late. Things could have gone a lot worse otherwise. He’s usually the one thinking up the plans here and making a move. They make a break for it several times as well although it tends to fail.

Personally I think the best chance would still be to just bolt through the front doors. Perhaps they can catch you and perhaps not but either way it’s a better area to defend yourself with than being trapped in your motel room where they can show up at any time. The tapes in the room give the main characters some prep time on how to handle themselves. I wonder if the tapes were left there intentionally to scare the main characters or if they just forgot. I could easily believe either option tbh. still, the characters didn’t make awful decisions for the most part at least. The most iffy move was when they decided to split up so that David would go to the phone booth while Amy tried the window though. I didn’t think that was a plan that really had any kind of chance.

Also, you should never under any circumstances split up in this kind of adventure. If the villains were to fun to the house and lock the door then you’ve just left Amy trapped in with the villains. It could backfire really badly. The heroes definitely go through a lot here though. There’s even a tunnel underneath the house that has a ton of rats everywhere. Fortunately they don’t bite but it’s definitely something to imagine that the villains have to go through that every time. I guess they definitely don’t back down from those kind of dangers.

The main villain of the bunch if Mason and he’s certainly not great at being subtle. He was playing a tape with a lot of screaming initially and didn’t even hear the main characters enter. So he potentially almost lose 2 victims without even knowing about it. That doesn’t speak very well of him as a villain mastermind at all. By the end he’s your classic horror villain just yelling all over the place. I can’t say I was a fan or that he’s particularly memorable.

Vacancy has a solid ending to be sure but I thought it lost out on one potential jump scare. See, there’s one villain who I was expecting to have one last moment because the way he was hit didn’t seem all that serious to me. I was expecting him to appear as a “Gotcha!” moment but he never did so I have to assume that he was taken out. If so, I definitely did not see that coming but props to the heroes for doing a thorough job.

The movie isn’t quite as violent as your average horror title. The violence tends to be more implied or out of view like when the characters are watching the tapes. That’s always the better way of doing it than having this onscreen if you have to have that violence included in some way. The villains are all definitely mega psychos either way though and this is one motel that you definitely don’t want to have to enter. This may remind David to actually take a look when someone is messing with the car next time. Probably not too smart to let someone under the hood with no supervision right?

The most forced scene though is when a cop shows up. Yeah, I like that the cop quickly went on high alert and was ready for action but the way they take him out of the picture just makes no sense. Seriously he’s got a gun. The characters need to know that he’s their best chance so keep a close lookout. The cop also should have been paying attention since he knows that he’s deep in enemy territory. We get the obligatory “Villain teleports” kind of scene but I wasn’t buying it for a second. No way you are taken by surprise when you already know that the villains are packing weapons and are right around the bend. It’s just not going to happen.

If I were to question another move, it would be how Amy leaves her spot so quickly. If I were her at that point I would be staying up there for as long as I could without food and drink to buy time for a proper escape moment. It turned out well that she left sooner but she couldn’t have possibly known that so it just ended up being a fortunate coincidence for her that almost went south.

Overall, Vacancy effectively shows how spooky it can be to be trapped in a motel room with everyone out to get you. Also if you have super bad luck so this could all be possible. There are only 3 villains but the heroes have no way of knowing where they are at any point so they have to be careful when making a move. That said, the film goes a little too far in making the main heroine look mean and unlikable. I would say to make her better and downgrade David a bit if you want a balance (Don’t make them both awful) but you could have easily made her a little more reasonable and they still get stuck in the motel. That would have helped quite a bit because their dialogue doesn’t help matters. I wouldn’t particularly recommend this one. You can really guess all of the story beats as they come and the core story isn’t strong enough to get past that.

Overall 4/10

In the Line of Fire review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

In the Line of Fire is a fun thriller with a good amount of action in it. It’s not going to have a ton of fight scenes but the action is more about the chase scenes and the characters trying to stay one step ahead of the other. It’s a really solid back and forth and while the film has an exceptionally weak romance, the rest of the film manages to stay strong from start to finish. It’s a very consistent watch.

The movie starts off with Frank solving another case/beating the bad guy as he betrays the villains he was spying on and saves his partner. It should be time to relax now but then he is called in on what would usually be a routine inspection but it becomes much more than that. There’s a guy who calls himself Booth that is planning on taking down the president. It won’t be easy to take him down of course but this guy has such a confident air about him that Frank knows he is serious. After all, Frank knows people well and he was also the guy around when JFK got bumped off. He can’t let this happen a second time. If it comes down to it, will he be able to jump in front of the bullet?

Especially back then it feels like it was probably really easy to try and take a shot. I remember an old saying about how if someone is ready to trade lives to destroy the other person then it is almost impossible to stop him. At that point there are few security measures which can rule that out. It’s why suicide bombings are so hard to stop as well. This guy is clearly obsessed but it’s difficult for Frank to get that across to the execs. One reason is because the President is losing the battle right now and re-election is very close at hand. If he misses out on his appearances then he could lose everything.

There’s also the fact that they get a lot of threats to the president all the time and so it’s hard for most of them to believe that this is anything different. This was back in the days where you could call the FBI and ask for an agent by name. It was just a different time so even the guy having Frank’s number doesn’t put as much fear into them as you would expect. That said, you like to think they would do a little better at following up on the guy once they see him in person on multiple occasions. By that point he is an actual danger because he apparently has the means to follow the president anywhere. Also shows that he has a lot of money.

Their interactions are always fun. Booth likes to say that he and Frank are friends while Frank naturally says that he is crazy and tries to get to him. You can definitely tell that Booth is insane and none of his points hold up at all but since there’s no way to get to him, you can see how Frank is frustrated by the whole thing. Frank’s also a lot older at this point so he has a tough time being on the field and moving around a lot. This just isn’t his game anymore but he has to get back into it because nobody else will take this seriously. Also, Booth has specifically picked Frank as his opponent and might not play ball with anyone else.

In a way Booth’s like the Riddler. He keeps giving Frank clues so that he can “stay in the game” since Booth wants this to be a fair fight. He very easily could have said nothing and would have assassinated the President with ease. Sometimes you can use a villain’s insanity against them and that’s what paid off for Frank here. Booth was a strong opponent but he laid the seeds to his own demise.

As for Frank, he really gets to ask himself just how tough he is. Can he make the tough calls when it counts? Everyone knows Frank can shoot someone as needed but actually taking the bullet is the big question. Frank’s partner deserves a lot of credit in that arena as he’s willing to risk his life for Frank on several occasions. I thought the partner was the best character in the whole film to be honest.

For Frank, he’s a solid lead but he’s the kind of guy who likes to joke around and be rude to hide his feelings. So he tends to pick on Lilly quite a lot even though he likes her. So…it’s almost like school yard flirting where you’re mean to the person you like. The romance here is awful though as he’s just way too old and the whole thing is so cliched. She even mentions how this can’t possibly work but the whole time you know that it will. That’s probably the worst part because by all accounts she should be right. How can this possibly work? It makes no sense when you think about it and the whole thing is super rushed.

It hurts her character a bit too since you know that she will ultimately break down after saying no the whole time. As an agent she does well and at least takes everything seriously. The romance was just so out of place though. As a whole the writing was good. I thought the adventure was planned out well and there was never a dull moment. The script may not have been amazing as it seemed like the channel may have had to edit it a bit or it could just be poor sound mixing on the movie’s part. Either way I would expect Frank to talk like this since it definitely fits his character type.

Overall, In the Line of Fire is a solid film. The movie makes good use of how old Frank is to show that he’s not going to win this on brawns alone. He has to really use his wits to track Booth down and he’s playing catch up for most of the film. There’s one moment where someone is bumped off and the heroes don’t find out about it for an extremely long amount of time. It takes so long that you almost forget about this moment which shows what kind of a lead Booth had. The film gets points for not bumping off the dog also. When Booth looked at the picture of a dog in someone’s office I got worried, but the movie doesn’t go there. So if you want a solid thriller about an agent going up against an assassin in a battle of wits then this is the title for you.

Overall 7/10

The Black Dog Review

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This film reminds you that it always gets tricky when you’re low on cash and there are shady characters around. It becomes a whole lot easier to say yes to these crazy deals when you don’t see any other alternative nearby and that gets the lead here although he should have still stayed out of it. Ultimately it’s a fun action thriller. I wouldn’t say it’s amazing or anything but it does well enough for itself where I could recommend it.

The movie starts off with showing how Jack’s in a tough spot. He did some time in prison for running some people over and in the meantime his wife has done her best to make ends meet but it just isn’t working. The house simply costs too much money and there’s no way to keep it even with Jack’s new job. His boss Frank approaches him with an offer though. Jack is to transport some goods across a long distance and if he succeeds then he’ll be given enough money to make things right. Jack has no driver’s license and the shipment sounds sketchy but ultimately the desperation wins out and he agrees to the deal. He’ll be riding with Earl, Sonny, and Wes but immediately they are attacked. The FBI and various villains are all after him. What could possibly be in this shipment that’s so important?

The villains really don’t waste any time in chasing Jack either. It feels like he’s only driving for about 5-10 minutes before they show up to bump him off. That’s the risk you take when agreeing to do an underground drive for some sketchy characters though. The film does a good job of constantly throwing action at you. I thought the pacing was pretty good here and as long as you like the truck moments then you should be good here. There isn’t much time for things to stay quiet at any point.

Aside from the main plot you also have the FBI agent who is constantly arguing with his rival. That made for a good dynamic as the new guy kept on trying to play psychologist while the FBI agent would just be aggressive the whole time. They definitely did not get along at all although you know by the end they will end up respecting each other. Either way it was a fun little gimmick to keep the government stuff interesting. You know I always like the government stuff either way but the comedy here was fun.

In the main plot things were a little more serious. After all, Jack’s not doing this for fun or anything, it’s all to try and make life easier for his family so he doesn’t even bother trying to get to know the guys. He’s just here to complete a mission and that’s it. He’s good on the fly though as he takes out several opponents and knows how to use a gun. He maybe could have beaten the guy in between the cars easier if he had just thrown him off but it’s hard to think of everything right away.

Jack makes for a solid main character. He’s no nonsense and is just doing what he can to get out of this alive and in one piece. He does well at calling the villains’ bluff and doesn’t lose confidence at any point. He’s just a tough guy and not someone who can be intimidated either. His allies weren’t the strongest though. First up is Sonny who actually was good. The guy may not like how the villains always alter their plans but he was ready beyond that. Probably should have been more heavily armed considering the line of work he’s in though.

Wes was the most annoying character here though. He’s always whining and the guy isn’t very smart. He serves as an obstacle to the heroes the entire time and never becomes all that useful. You’re waiting for him to be left behind or taken out throughout the journey because he just puts the heroes in a worse spot every time he talks. He is always delivering bad news to the point where it even gets funny after a while. Still, there was no way to like this guy.

Earl’s okay, it’s hard to get a read on him. See, the guy seems rather shady the whole time but it’s always hard to prove it so like the main character you’re watching him in a wary kind of way. The guy has confidence in his own driving and singing abilities though so you have to respect that. In the end I thought he was a fun character.

Then you’ve got the two main villains Frank and Red. Frank is your classic bad guy who wants money and to be powerful. There’s not a whole lot to him but I’d say he’s decent. What he lacks in skill and interest he makes up for in efficiency. Still, I doubt you’ll remember him in the end. Red is much more memorable and I thought he was interesting. The guy is one of those crazy villains who thinks that quoting scripture means that he’s on the right side when he’s really just twisting it all to try and help himself. I thought he was an entertaining villain the whole way through though and did give us a fun extra climax.

Now as for the Black Dog angle, it was random but interesting the whole time. So apparently in this film if you are on the road for too long then you might see a black dog that attacks you. It’s a hallucination but one that a lot of drivers see so this rumor has really gotten around. It’s interesting but just feels really random the whole time. It does make for a really intense flashback though and shows how Jack got himself into trouble the first time.

The part of the movie that feels a little tacked on and not really necessary was the family drama though. I don’t think we really needed the whole hostage part to be thrown in. Felt like it was just ticking a box. I would have preferred the whole action parts took place during the drive. Then he arrives home with a classic “That was easy!” moment as he winks at the screen and we cut to black. It wasn’t a bad sequence of scenes or anything but it just felt really random. It was impressive how Jack still called the guy’s bluff a few times though. He handled that differently from most leads.

Overall, The Black Dog was a fun film. I would consider it to be a very average action title. It’s not going to do anything that you haven’t seen before but it also doesn’t really make any mistakes. As a result it’s a title that you can easily go back to at any time. You may have less reason to do that because there are stronger options but it’s always going to be out there. It’s also an easy recommendation because it’s such an easy action title.

Overall 7/10

Attack of the Puppet People Review

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Attack of the Puppet People seems like a misleading title to be honest as they aren’t the main antagonists here. Maybe “Night of the Living Doll” or something like that could have worked instead. Still, this is a fun film and you’ll get a kick out of it. Some of the character’s reactions may not make a whole lot of sense and one character is extremely slow on the uptake but ultimately it’s a unique premise that’s executed rather well I’d say. The movie has strong fundamentals and never wavers.

The movie starts with Sally heading to a doll store where there was a help wanted sign. The owner (Mr. Franz) is so delighted to have her start up that she is a little taken aback. Perhaps this is not the job for her? Well, Franz is quite pushy so in the end she relents and starts right away. The job’s pretty fun for a while and she even meets a salesman named Bob and they get serious about each other. Bob even asks her to marry him but then he mysteriously vanishes the next day. When Sally goes to work she sees a doll that looks just like Bob (Smart move Franz….) but can it really be him? Sally then realizes that the other dolls look like other people who have vanished such as the previous secretary and mailman. Could Franz be turning people into dolls? Sally sure thinks so but how can she possibly prove this? It will be difficult indeed.

Part of the issue is that this story sounds crazy to anyone who hears it. How can you turn someone into a doll? That doesn’t make sense and sounds like something straight out of a Sci-Fi movie. The Police Sergeant that she talks to is a huge skeptic for sure. He does realize that quite a few people have vanished recently but figures there’s nothing about this that links it to Franz just yet. The guy does a little digging but misses on every single clue and is always in the right place at the wrong time. Ultimately you can’t count on that guy to help very much at all. He seems like a nice guy but not a useful one.

As for Sally, well she’s okay and at least she figured out what was going on quickly. My main issue with her is that she can be a bit of a pushover. She really lets Franz talk her into accepting the job and then doesn’t even realize as he locked the door behind him. She should have dashed out after the Sergeant. After all, she just claimed him to be a kidnapper so even if the cops didn’t believe it, there’s no way this would end well for her. She should have ducked out immediately.

Franz is the main villain here and not the smartest guy. First off, Sally would not have even suspected anything if he didn’t have the new doll just sitting there. Why wouldn’t the villain keep all the human dolls in hiding and only display the actual ones? From what we saw of the shop, he has no shortage of those so lock the human ones somewhere safe and display the fake ones. Case closed and that would have made him a lot harder to track. I’m convinced that this guy wasn’t very good at the villain game as he also gives the humans a lot of freedom while he’s outside and underestimates how much they want to be free. You can see how he is a bit crazy as he thinks the people really like him and he even tries to get them to sing to him but ultimately that’s his undoing.

For a good chunk of the film the characters are dolls so that makes for an interesting dynamic. Knowing that you could be put into suspended animation at any point has to be rather terrifying. You’re rarely ever truly safe at that point. One doll for example was kept in stasis for months so she barely knew what was happening at first. When your life is completely dependent on the whims of a random villain like this, then you definitely want to get out as soon as possible.

I think you do have to play it cool at some points like when they were first awakened, but otherwise you have to try as many plans as possible. The phone plan was a good idea and same for the trying to turn back to their adults form moment. Ultimately the heroes tried a lot of options which was good but they’re inherently at a huge disadvantage just due to how small they are. There’s only so much that you can do at this size.

The movie also has some fun humor. Franz has a best friend who is always coming over to talk. It was nice how that guy would always come with the worst timing and slow Franz down. Usually you see that happening a lot to the heroes so for once the roles were reversed here and the villain is the one who had to deal with this. That’s definitely something that’s a little different. The friend also really meant well and seemed like an earnest guy. Too bad he didn’t have better friends.

It is pretty interesting to see what life could be like if you had to live as a doll. Even if you take away the suspended animation part I don’t think it would be a good deal though. Just about everything would be dangerous. One of the captives says that a plus is not really having to do anything. You just get to walk a bit, have your free meal, and do some entertaining. The issue is that you really do feel like a toy after that. I can see wanting to be super tall like a Kaiju or something but even then that would only be good if you could shrink afterwards. Otherwise no deal.

The plot may be rather low key but the writing is what really helps it be entertaining. The main characters are good and Franz makes for a solid villain. There’s one scene where he forces Sally to act in a play but I thought the whole “jump scare” where the doll turns into Hyde didn’t seem as intense/scary as they tried to make it. This ultimately leads to Bob beating the doll up but I didn’t really understand the big reaction. The doll was a little scary sure, but I didn’t think it was That scary.

As a final note, I do think the Sergeant was really pushing it here. When he saw that Franz was hiring yet another secretary as the last one “Went abroad to go find her fiancé” that should have raised massive red flags. That would be another disappearance and yet the cop doesn’t really think twice about it. He accepts the guy’s word right away. Even if you don’t buy into the supernatural element, what about the possibility that this guy is just kidnapping people the old fashioned away? There are too many people going missing for this to be a coincidence. Ultimately it ends up being the main character’s responsibility to help take this guy down but it would have been nice if they had some kind of backup.

Overall, The poster may not be very good for this film but the execution is. There’s even a quick scene where the characters are watching a film and it’s nice and meta since there were quite a few similarities in that plot. It felt kind of random but the scenes they chose in that film were definitely entertaining so that worked out well. I also thought the characters were good. One of the captives seemed to have gotten used to this life too easily but the others were totally faking it so that helped even things out. The writing was good and the film was fun so in the end that’s all that counts here. It ended up being a fun ride.

Overall 7/10

It! The Terror from Beyond Space Review

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Whenever you see a film with a title like this, you know that it’s about to get very interesting. Aliens are always a lot of fun and with a film this old school you know that the writing will be on point as well. It’s got a very classic feel to every scene and the movie is short but still crams a lot in. Ultimately you should have a pretty good time with this one.

The film starts off with Carruthers and his crew on Mars. This was expected to be a big success but unfortunately all of the other crewmembers aboard are dead. A second spaceship is sent to retrieve him but the government believes that Carruthers murdered them all so this group is to bring him back to Earth to have him executed. Carruthers claims that some kind of monster took them out but the evidence doesn’t look good. After all, one of the crew’s skulls appears and has a bullet hole in it which certainly doesn’t sound like a creature is responsible. Carruthers quickly adds that it might have been accidental friendly fire from someone……then some members of the crew mysteriously start to vanish. Is Carruthers really insane and has started to bump everyone off or is it possible that there is an alien on the ship?

It’s not much of a mystery since the film shows you that an alien has come aboard right away but the dialogue can still be fun to see how Carruthers will get out of this. After all, even circumstantial evidence might be enough to take him down since most don’t believe there would be a whole lot of alternatives in space. If you don’t believe in aliens then odds are that you wouldn’t believe in the guy’s story. In particular, Heusen seems to have it all figured out. He gives a full speech about exactly why Carruthers bumped everyone off as he cites the lack of supplies and how this was the safest way to go. It would be tough talking him out of it although the rest of the crew tries to get him to ease up a bit.

You end up feeling bad for Carruthers the whole time because he’s just been through a very traumatic experience and having to be grilled and mistrusted after that really doesn’t make the experience any easier. It’s like he’s 100% truly alone now. I’ll give him a lot of credit for continuing to fight hard for the team and investigating the vanishings right away. He’s far more on the ball about this than any of the other characters. It takes a whole lot for them to finally get on board and see how serious this is.

There’s also a little romance started near the end but I can’t say that there was a whole lot of purpose to it. You would feel bad for Heusen if he was a nicer guy since this doesn’t bode well for him. Who’d have thought there was any chance of losing your girlfriend while on a space trip to Mars right? There isn’t a whole lot of time to dwell on this with an alien on board though even if not for a lack of trying on the guy’s part.

If the film has a weakness, it’s that the climax can be a little drawn out. At one point they figure out that they can use some fire to keep the alien at bay. So once guy stays downstairs with the fire gun while the others make some plans. This stalemate lasts for quite a while at one point. Both sides are feeling good about staying on their ends so there’s just a lot of talking about what to do. The monster is bullet proof and quite intelligent so that removes a lot of their possible options right away.

I like to think the heavier artillery might have done something but of course the first guy with the super gun has bad reaction times and allows the alien to get in close enough to bend it in half. So much for the gun right? That definitely did not go as planned but it made the guy look so bad. You have to be ready to shoot right away and not let the villain grab your gun. That’s a really easy way to get bumped off. One of the guys who goes down doesn’t even yell before being taken out. All of this is what allows the alien to stay in the game longer than he should have been.

The alien has a cool design though. It’s a little bit like the Gill Man but different so I would still call it unique. It does help further the classic “Green Martians” visual you get from those aliens which is cool. If anything this might have been one of the films to help strengthen that concept from the start. He is strong and surprisingly quick at times so this villain definitely gets to look good. It adds to the sense of danger in the film. While the climax can be a little long without a whole lot happening due to how durable the creature is, it does help to show why the crew would fear him so much.

By the end of the film it’s safe to say that nobody else will be going to Mars for a very long time. The place just isn’t safe anymore. Just one alien did a lot of damage, imagine a whole bunch of them? Space is also the last place where you want to face off against any enemies because there is just no escape. If you lose then that’s game over because you don’t have room to retreat. If anything the main characters were lucky to last as long as they did because the ship had a lot of different levels.

Overall, This was a fun film. It had good dialogue and an engaging plot. The government may have only gotten two scenes but they were both fun. The film is fairly short so you’ll knock it out quickly. This allows the alien himself to appear right away at least, I want to say he showed up within a few minutes although the first battle with the humans wasn’t for a little while after that. It’s not quite ready to top some of the other classic Alien stories but it’s a pretty good movie all the same. It also seems rare that we get an alien movie in actual outer space like this, at least back in the 50s. The effects were good though so this has aged well.

Overall 7/10