One Piece Film Gold Review

Posted on January 14, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time to look at my first ever One Piece film! I got to see this one in theaters the other day and it feels good to finally join the One Piece community. I’ve seen around 3-400 episodes of the anime and am caught with the manga plus I’ve played several of the games, but checking out a movie seals the deal. Now I just need to work on getting back to One Piece Z, which shouldn’t be too hard. I forgot that it has a DVD release. Gold is definitely a fun film and one that is certainly amplified in the theater. While it is certainly not ready to compete with Naruto or DBZ, it’s a film that stays consistent with the high energy nature of One Piece throughout.

Luffy and the gang finished beating up Doflamingo in what was an incredibly difficult situation so they figured it was time to relax a little. The crew heads to Gran Tesoro, the fictional equivalent of Las Vegas. The entire country lies on a boat which is owned by Tesoro and he puts on a big show for the rest of the world. Beneath the luxery hotels and gambling sites, the place has a dark underside. Luffy and friends manage to gamble away all of their winnings as they underestimated Baccarat’s luck abilities. They try to fight their way out, but Zoro is captured. The crew must now recognize him and stop Tesoro’s plot before it’s too late. Raw strength won’t win the day this time so the Strawhats have to get to action with some stealth.

For a minute there, I actually thought that the film was going to be subbed because of the Japanese credits with no translation. I’m not saying that this would have been a bad thing since I’ve seen many films subbed and it’s always fun, but the Dub really does make a difference. It’s night and day comparing the two versions and it’s fun to hear all of the old voices since I’m still watching One Piece every week on Toonami. The film starts off nice and strong with a quick fight scene as the full crew of the Strawhats get to use their signature attacks against a group of overconfident pirates. I’m always game for an opening action scene and moreover, I think all films should have a start like that. You need to do something that grabs people’s attention and nothing does that better than a fight. The animators also had fun experimenting with the animation during this phase.

Most of the Strawhats didn’t get to do all that much so I’ll quickly gloss over the least important members here. Tony Tony Chopper’s bounty is still significantly lower than the rest and he isn’t all that strong anymore, but he has heart. He helps the team get past some lasers and the whole crew does help in some challenge or another, but that’s about the extent of it for him. Brook also doesn’t do much, but he does have his hardcore moment in the intro where he takes out three pirates. He even borrows the legendary saying “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak” as he one shots them. It’s a shame that Brook can’t keep this up forever as he would actually be a great character if not for one trope. Luckily, that one is not present in the film so as far as this movie is concerned, Brook is actually a good character. Sanji’s mostly just around as well and he doesn’t even get his own 1 on 1 fight during the climax. He looks pretty bad for most of the film when it comes to power, but gts to show up some of the guards.

Usopp is pivotal in stopping one of the last villains so that was a good way for him to wrap things up. I expected him to play things up a little more while at Gran Tesoro, but I guess it wasn’t worth the risk. Robin questions things as per usual and is a little more sharp than the others, but with a Captain like Luffy, this ultimately doesn’t help stop the crew from doing whatever they want. Franky’s role isn’t quite as big as the main three, but he helps a lot on the spying part. I’m wondering why he didn’t use his Robot Mode until the end, but maybe it wouldn’t have helped that much anyway given who they were fighting.

Zoro’s role is smaller than the other two since he is captured for most of the film. I wasn’t really disappointed with how he looked though as his battle plan was sound and he did a good job of stopping Dice in the end. The fight was a little closer than you’d expect and I do miss the days when he was portrayed to be around equal to Luffy, but those days are long gone. I still think he was a better character before Impel Down, but in this film he acted a lot like his old self and ended up being the best character in the film.

Nami plays a rather large role here as well. She was pretty misleading when she said that Carina betrayed her in the past, but ultimately we found out the truth by the end. She’s still a good thief as always and she does get her chance to fight in this movie. As the brains behind the Strawhat crew, she’s definitely a member who will always be needed on the team. She’s a charismatic character and her banter with Carina was solid.

Finally, Luffy is the leader of the gang and he is very determined as always. He can’t usually back up his tough talk here as he spends most of the film getting beat up and tricked by the villains, but at least it never deters him. He makes a lot of good speeches by the end and he is certainly the heavy hitter of the team. While he’s certainly no Goku, Luffy’s a good main character. His comic relief moments can sometimes be a bit much as he doesn’t take their plight seriously enough, but he fights when necessary.

Tesoro is the main villain of the film. His gold abilities make him a very deadly adversary and he is very confident from start to finish. This is his world after all and he is used to getting everything that he wants. He gets a sob story by the end and it is pretty drastic. It makes you wonder why he never used his newfound riches to get revenge or see what happened to his friend. Usually, the flashback would have ended with that kind of moment as Tesoro takes out the villains before becoming the villain, but not this time. Of course, Tesoro ended up going off the deep end and becoming a big villain himself so it went just about full circle. It’s hard to sympathize with him when he has made a paradise island for the same villains who stole his friend though. It makes the whole thing rather sketchy.

Baccarat’s the public face of the villains as she scouts out the opponents and uses her luck abilities to ensure that they fall into Tesoro’s trap. His plans wouldn’t work quite as smoothly without her. She’s a good villain and her luck powers are certainly convenient for combat. It’s the kind of power that can be tough to deal with, but luckily Usopp was on the case. She probably wishes that she had toyed with the heroes a little less and gone straight for the win.

Dice was a good villain because of his abilities and how powerful he was, but his personality wasn’t that great. He enjoyed fighting in the wrong way and that gimmick was a little distracting from how good he would have been otherwise. I didn’t expect him to be as physically strong as he was and he was certainly the most intimidating member of the villains. It’s safe to say that only Sanji, Luffy, and Zoro could hope to defeat this guy.

Tanaka’s not as much of a fighter and he prefers to do recon and give intel to Tesoro. He leaves the actual combat to the others, but his ability to phase through things does allow him to fight when necessary. It’s hard to get a bead on the guy because of how quick he is. He held his own well enough and rounded out Tesoro’s trio.

Carina is one of the main heroines in this film and she spends a lot of it switching from side to side. You never know who she will be helping out as she may not even suspect herself. She’s not really a fighter unfortunately, but she has survived for quite a while on the island so she certainly has a talent for living and being sneaky. You can’t help but feel that her task would have been doomed from the start though. There’s no way she could possibly steal a bunch of gold and get away with it on such a big island where Tesoro sees all. She may have been a little too confident there, but she’s a nice addition to the cast and even helped Nami out back in the day. Whether Nami wants to see the truth or not, she would have been in quite the pickle without Carina.

The film also gives us some quick guest star appearances from CP0’s Lucci and Sabo. They show up as a little treat to the fans and get into a quick skirmish, but nothing really comes out of it. I honestly wouldn’t have minded if they just had Sabo win that fight since I think he should certainly have the edge, but maybe Lucci is stronger than I thought. Either way, the situation won’t make the government look all that good, but when are they ever all that heroic in One Piece? It was also cool to see the Magma guy as I can definitely see him being one of the final bosses in the One Piece manga as well. The scenes may not lead to much and you’ll know this beforehand, but they’re still pretty hype.

The main positive of the film is its incredibly high budget. It’s certainly some of the best One Piece animation that you’ll see. The first fight scene gets very flashy as the camera moves around a lot and everyone uses exaggerated attacks. The rest hold up as well with nice effects and consistently good animation. I think the animation will continue to hold up well for quite some time and this is the kind of animation that I’d expect from a 2016 film. Forget CGI, Flash, Stop Motion, Lego, Live Action, and any other techniques you can think of. Classic anime style graphics are all you need. There really wasn’t much of an epic soundtrack to be found here, but the tunes weren’t bad either.

Film Gold is also just fun from start to finish. There’s always something happening and the pacing is nice and quick. It’s the kind of film where you can just sit back and enjoy the show. It does its best to be a complete story filled with a lot of side characters and hintings at their past and then the main plot. There’s no time to fully get into these other character backstories, but I wouldn’t have wanted the film to do that anyway.

That being said, there are some things that keep this from being a great film. For one thing, while there is a lot of action, I wouldn’t say that there are a lot of fight scenes. We’ve got the fight at the beginning and then that’s basically it until the very end when the Strawhats take on the main 4. The final fights are naturally a lot of fun and Luffy’s as well as Zoro’s are played seriously. The group against Baccarat’s was more of a comedy fight, but it was enjoyable as well. The climax was mostly solid on that end.

I did have one main problem with it though and that’s the fact that Luffy’s fight is mainly against Tesoro in his giant form. As a result, it becomes a battle of giant fighters so there isn’t much moving or hand to hand action. Luffy even uses Gear 4 and that’s more of the same since he basically becomes the Hulk. I still think that form was a big mistake as Gear 2 is still the most impressive by far. Even when you see Luffy moving in Gear 4, you’ll wonder how nobody just swats him out of the sky.

This film can also be a little on the fanservicey side at time. Since this takes place in part 2 of One Piece, Nami and Robin are always in a swimsuit and while the film gives them new attire for the Casino part, it’s not much of an improvement for Robin. Nami’s new costume is okay though. Since this is a parody of Las Vegas, you shouldn’t expect the attire to be much different for all of the other characters who show up. Carina also has to use this to her advantage to distract some guards. It’s not all that egregious, but still rather noticeable. Even the racing scene can’t avoid it as the camera angles decide to get a little tricky.

I also think that Film: Gold is one of those titles that probably wouldn’t hold up quite as well in a rewatch. Similar to Battle of Gods which got a 9 immediately after watching it, but dropped to a 7 afterwards, I think Gold would have a bit of a drop as well. Part of what makes it so grand and special isn’t just the animation, but the sound effects as well. They were all quite loud in the theaters and you could really feel all of the impacts. It’s hard to get the same effect at home unless you have a really good sound system. It’ll be a little more noticeable when you’re in the wait between fight scenes.

One plot in particular that will drag on is Luffy’s adventure through the gold sandy wasteland. Nothing really happens there for a little while. I also didn’t care much for the cafe plot as Luffy and friends just watch as someone is beaten up for a while. It’s unfortunately something that the cast is consistent with doing, but most main characters wouldn’t just sit back and watch this go down. It’s probably one of the reasons why the cast has always lagged back a little. They aren’t heroes as they’re just pirates who happen to save the day and it becomes readily apparent at times like this. With the government also being corrupt, it’s rough for the every day citizens. I did say that the pacing was pretty good though and these plots don’t take too long but are the most uneventful parts of the film. I also have to point out that Nami’s big plan at the end of the film doesn’t make too much sense. It revolves around a ton of little events that had to happen just right in order for the plan to work and there was no way that the team could have prepared for such an eventuality.

Finally, I have to say that the Strawhats just looked very weak. They talk a good game a lot of the time and even make some of the right moves, but it doesn’t matter if they’re just going to get overwhelmed. Zoro, Sanji, and Luffy put up such a terrible fight against Tesoro. I don’t think that they should have lost so easily. Zoro I can understand since he was already turning into gold, but Luffy and Sanji had no such excuse. They were simply outsped and that’s just hard to believe since they are so fast by this point. This guy isn’t exactly Doflamingo, they should be able to handle him. I do like his ability to manipulate gold though, I always liked elemental type powers like that.

Overall, One Piece Film Gold was a fun film. It’s basically a summer blockbuster film and is certainly a technical masterpiece. It may have had its share of issues, but I could easily watch it again. It was really close to scoring that 8, but just missed it. There’s a lot of action and excitement throughout plus I’m always up for a good anime film. It’s a good way to be introduced to the One Piece films and I’m sure that big fans will enjoy the movie even more. One Piece as a franchise has always been below the other big titles for me as the humor and characters just never caught up to the others. As such, it makes sense that the film would have the same problems for me. One thing that would help the other One Piece films would be to have a better final fight and to ignore Gear 4 and mostly just focus on 2. Nevertheless, I’d say that it’s one of the best films in 2016 as a 7 for anime can still take on a 9 for live action. If you haven’t checked this film out yet, then I’d definitely recommend that you do. Now I just have to wait and see how this compares to other upcoming films like Sword Art Online and Yugioh. I am assuming that the other two will likely win, but it could end up being a close fight with Sword Art Online. You can never tell with that series.

Overall 7/10

Lego DC Comics Super Heroes: Justice League: Cosmic Clash Review

Posted on January 14, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time for another Lego Justice League Adventure! This one is quite a step down from the last one, but lets be honest…how could it possibly have topped that one? The last one was near perfection and the series had been hitting it on all cylinders. It makes sense that it would have to slow down at some point and this was that moment. The film may not be all that long, but it didn’t feel that way and several parts slowed it down. Unfortunately, the film lost its identity, but I believe it will find it again.

Brainiac is coming to Earth and the heroes may not be able to stop him this time. This being has conquered many planets before and Earth is just to be another stepping stone for him. To ensure that the Justice League do not interfere, Brainiac erases their memories and sends them into the distant path. Specifically, he does this to Green Lantern, Wonder Woman, and Superman since they are the League’s heavy hitters. Batman must don the cape once more (Well, fine he already had the cape) and travel back in time to restore their memories and then come back to finish off Brainiac. Can the other members buy him some time along with the new recruit: Supergirl, or is humanity already doomed?

The film starts off very strong with the Justice League taking care of business as usual. The way that they handled the invasion was very on point and while Batman may not have been invited for hide and seek…at least the heroes were apologetic about it. I can see their side of the story as well since there is no reason for them to expect that Batman would have wanted a piece of the action right? These films are always at their best when the League is around since the banter between them is always solid.

You all know that Lego Animation isn’t my favorite so the film can’t rely on its animation to get it through to a solid score. The writing and soundtrack have to be on point. While the music isn’t quite as dynamic as some of the other films, it’s still pretty solid as it should be. What helps to make the film pretty good is that the writing is mostly good. This is also what brings it down from past films. The writing is excellent with the main Justice League members. They all look pretty great and Batman steals the show as expected. His voice actor does a tremendous job in the role and the character just has all of the best moments. Unfortunately, the writing falters with Brainiac and Supergirl. I feel like the film overplayed its hand with those two.

Supergirl’s personality is a little different than usual as she’s all about being a cheer leader and constantly cheers throughout the film. “Give me a D and an O and O and M” for example as she keeps on punching out villains and this gets old the very first time that she did it. As she continues on and on…it just doesn’t help matters. I can’t say that I really liked her in this film and she joins Cyborg as a member of the team who doesn’t really feel like she’s there yet. It was a fun in joke though as Cyborg was basically cut off during his big montage moment by the others. All of the main Leaguers got their own big moment inspired by the animated Justice League’s intro, but Cyborg had to share with someone and it only lasted for an instant. I forgot who he had to share with though.

As for Brainiac, he’s maybe a little too silly at times. His dialogue isn’t crafty and subtlety funny like the League members and just goes for more of the obvious jokes. His banter with the other Brainiacs is cool though and managing to see through their ruse was actually pretty impressive. I guess we know why he is the brains of the operation right? He can’t fight the others in hand to hand combat, but he had a lot of robots to make for a bit of a climax. His plan was good at any rate since erasing the memories of the heroes was basically fool proof. It’s just that Batman exists so no plan is ever completely fool proof.

As for the Batman plot, I only liked one out of the three time travel adventures. Wonder Woman’s will be clear as to why I didn’t like it. Batman warps back to the Caveman era so the locale is pretty bad and I don’t care for everyone speaking like a Caveman. It was interesting to see Wonder Woman show her true colors and murder all of the men though. They were asking for it so I won’t really object. Luckily Batman was around to set things straight. Green Lantern’s also dragged on, but not nearly as much. I did like how they incorporated the meme of Batman riding a shark and he just acted pretty hardcore the whole time. I’m not sure about Batman being caught so easily though. The pirates should have been thoroughly outclassed. These two segments are what held down the film to an extent, but at least the final segment helped to make up for it.

Batman winds up in an apocalyptic future that will remind you of Future’s End. Superman is now working for Brainiac so Batman must take him down yet again to prove once and for all who the strongest crime fighter is. Batman won’t even resort to Kryponite because deep down…he’s never needed it! It’s a pretty intense fight and we even have the Legion of Superheroes show up. This was definitely a fun part of the film and I’m always eager to see Batman and Superman go at it. It’s a match-up that never gets old and seeing as how they’re the best characters in all of DC Comics, it’s easy to see why.

If anything, I’d just like to see more of the League next time. When I mentioned that the film lost its identity, it’s that the plot just wasn’t worth it. Having the League sent to different eras ensured that we couldn’t see the whole team for very long. It meant that we only had the D listers in the main plot as Batman tried to gather up everyone in the B Plot. The film is at its best when the League is bantering and making fun of the villains as they humiliate them. We didn’t get much of a chance of that here, but at least we did learn that while Superman is one of the greatest Hide and Seek players, Batman is the best. Just about all of the really funny moments involve Batman, Superman, or the League as a whole. Removing that aspect also ensures that you’re removing a critical piece of the film.

Overall, This is still a solid film though and one that I’d recommend. Other titles like Teen Titans GO can learn a thing or two from this one on how to do humor effectively. Specifically, look at Batman. I can’t stress enough just how good he is and this is one of those cases where he is even better than Superman. Batman gets all of the best lines and character development as well as some of the best action scenes. He’s always got a good plan even if nobody ever listens to him. I don’t know where the League would be without him, but it’s safe to say that the group wouldn’t be nearly as potent. I look forward to seeing which Lego Justice League film comes out next. It’s a series that I hope doesn’t end anytime soon as there are still many stories to tell.

Overall 7/10

The Shadow of the Cat Review

Posted on January 14, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time for another old film, but one that certainly ended up being quite a lot better. It’s a solid film with an engaging plot and it never drags on since the film is barely over an hour. There aren’t really any good characters for the most part, but that’s fine since they will go down one by one anyway.

One day, Ella is murdered by her butler Andrew. He was in cahoots with her husband Walter and the maid Clara. The three of them took her out so they could grab her riches. Conveniently for them, they even have a Will signed by her that gives everything to Walter. The problem is that her real will is somewhere in the house and they can’t find it. Well, no matter. They invite Beth over because the real will gave everything to her. They just need to take her out of the picture so they can be really safe. The problem is that Ella’s cat saw the whole thing and now she is out for revenge. Can the adults handle one cat or are they doomed!?

The Cat is definitely the MVP here. It’s hard to deny it since the Cat is by far the most efficient member of the cast. One by one she bumps the villains off and does so theatrically. She lets the others know that they will be next and even gives the main villain a heart attack. Walter and the others begin to fear the Cat quite a lot while also disliking it more and more. The ball is still in the Cat’s corner though and she knows the place like the back of her hand. She knows that she can pick off the others whenever she wants so she bides her time…and pounces when the time is right!

Naturally, there’s no way you will feel bad for any of the villains. Andrew murdered a defenseless old woman so he was doomed from the start. Even when he managed to capture the Cat for an instant, he underestimated how long it would take to get to the river and was quickly drowned by the Cat. It was all over for that guy. Walter’s death was only a matter of time as well as he started to have strokes and heart attacks whenever the cat was near. He played the part of the nice guy when everyone else was around, but he couldn’t trick the Cat. Finally, Clara may not have been as directly involved, but she was in on it so that made her guilty as well. Her end was just as intense as the cat slammed her to the ground…from a few stories up! She never stood a chance against the cat’s technique and skill.

Seeing as how the villains were getting tossed and turned the whole time, Walter called for some backup. He invited his corrupt family members over and they all wanted to end his life as well. Clearly, this may not have been his best move and it turns out to be his final one. It’s not like they have any more luck against the cat though. They talk a good game, but simply don’t stand a chance. Not even the ex-con is clever enough to stop the cat.

As for the heroes of the story, I might as well start off with Inspector Rowles. He doesn’t believe this “rubbish” about a cat murdering people and is content to just walk around and look important. He’s easily the most likable protagonist as you have to admit..would you believe that a little cat was destroying everyone? It is a little hard to swallow so I can accept his response. At least he wasn’t too unreasonable and still suspected the villains by the end. Michael’s a reporter who is very eager to believe what is happening and gets to the bottom of the puzzle right away. He’s certainly skilled as he found out everything. His romance with Beth was handled poorly though as it just happens out of the blue. Even then Beth doesn’t believe him about how Walter is evil and she is slow on the uptake the whole time. Beth was pretty annoying. Her worst moment was when a butcher knife was thrown at her and Beth didn’t really care. She just shrugged and kept on going instead of stopping to think that maybe these people are dangerous. She accepts that they are bad people when they keep talking about murdering the cat, but she never does anything about it. She’s also a little too accepting of the fact that she wasn’t in the will. Beth should have suspected foul play there.

This film could have easily taken a wrong turn if the cat had actually been captured and destroyed. The film would have went the ghost route as it avenged itself, but it still would have been too dark. Given how desperate all of the villains were to murder it, I wouldn’t have wanted to give them the satisfaction. How the film went about the plot was just about perfect if you ask me. I mean, it would have been hype to have seen the cat pick up the gun and shoot everyone, but the slow and steady approach worked as well. It’s definitely not too often that you see a cat destroy everyone. The film isn’t too violent either. The most violent scene is probably when Ella got murdered and luckily we get that over with right away. The Cat should have helped there and I was a little surprised that it did not, but at least the Cat helped to avenge Ella later on. Better late than never I suppose.

What also makes this film a little different is the fact that the Cat is avenging Ella as opposed to just being an evil cat who murders everyone. None of the heroes are bumped off since they weren’t responsible for destroying Ella and the new family who moves in should also be safe in theory. I’m sure that the cat would have made for a good villain as well, but it was a nice change of pace to see the Cat as a vigilante hero.

Overall, This is a pretty fun film. It’s not a comedy I believe, but plays out like a good natured slasher film. I know that the term slasher may not be the most appropriate here, but how else do you describe a film where a mysterious, super powerful villain begins to bump off all of the humans one by one? Regardless, the film kept it classy throughout and while the villains were all evil and unlikable, the film never went too far to show us just how gritty and dark they were. Moderation is always key and this film did a good job of that. I definitely recommend checking it out and I’d say that this one beats the Black Cat. We’ll see if the Black Cat sequel can match up to this one though.

Overall 7/10

Voodoo Woman Review

Posted on January 14, 2017 by dreager1

Uh oh, it’s time for another indie film. You know how some series like Transformers start you off with a low bar? Indie films have no bar at this point so you can only expect to hit rock bottom and not rise above it. It’s rather sad to generalize all indie films like that, but it’s gotten to the point where I’ve probably seen like 10+ indie films in a row and they’ve all turned out to be completely terrible or just very bad. This one is no exception as it manages to reach the legendary 0 score. There’s just nothing good about this film and it gradually gets worse and worse as it goes on.

Marilyn wants to get rich so she murders some guy and gets the bartender to trick a hired guide to take her to some tribes. She wants their gold and will do just about anything to get it. Dr. Chaka tells her that the tribe will let her steal their gold if she goes through a ritual. He wants to do this because he aims to create a super creature who is superior to humankind and then he will show her off to the other colleges. She has different plans for this though and either way, the tribe looks to be in some real danger.

The film starts out at rock bottom right from the get go. We see a dead animal as part of a vicious ritual and then a young maiden having to become a monster. She resists the orders to destroy her village, but it’s still a pretty sad fate. She escapes only to get forcefully used and then murdered by one of the main characters. The film was desperate to stay as dark and gritty as it could throughout. This scene didn’t add anything to the film and just reminded you of what you were watching.

Another ongoing plot is that Marilyn is used to getting what she wants through the use of her feminine wiles, but Ted (The adventurer) is determined not to let her win. As such, he goes the James Bond route. He has his fun, but always reminds her afterwards that he still won’t help her. It’s certainly not the most heroic route to go if you ask me and it just makes both characters look really bad. Rick’s the terrible main character who turns out to be evil and is quickly murdered afterwards. It was good to have him written out of the film at the very least.

Meanwhile, you have Chaka’s wife who is imprisoned in her own home. She makes the mistake of running towards the villains though which doesn’t end well. At least she gets over her husband’s death pretty quick once Ted comes along. Chaka was a bad person and the film made sure to show that quite a lot so it makes you wonder how they ever got together anyway. Meanwhile, one slave tried to help the wife, but was naturally murdered for his efforts. If you leave this film alive, you can count yourself lucky since most of the characters were murdered by the end.

The actual Voodoo Woman in question wasn’t a very scary monster. She could barely move and had to be the slowest villain that I’ve seen since the Gill Man. While she was bullet proof as well as acid proof, I can’t see anyone actually being scared of her in the theater. That means that the film failed on that account. The suit was also pretty low budget and just looked fake the whole time. The film also barely had the Voodoo Woman appear, probably due to budget constraints.

The film’s first half takes forever to go anywhere. The two plots don’t merge until the film is already well into the climax and then it quickly ends. I was glad that the film wasn’t any longer since it had already been dragging on for quite a while. The sooner it was over the better if you ask me. After all, watching a 0 star film is never much of a pleasant experience. How could the film have been better? Well, cut out Rick and all of his scenes, take away Chaka and his experiments, take away Marilyn and her unfortunate plots, take away all of the animal violence, and then we’ve got a film. The problem is that you’re taking away about 80% of the film so it’s a completely different movie by that point right? That’s why there basically isn’t anything to save in this film, it would take a whole other movie to be good.

The only part of the film that could have been semi decent was the corrupt cafe towards the beginning of the film. I like how the bartender robs people and then covers up murders for an extra profit. He covers all of the bases and even robs the people that are about to be murdered so the real murderer can’t take the full cut of the profits. Even here though, the film makes sure to remind you that none of the characters are too smart. One professional is distracted by a dancer who very obviously goes to distract him and doesn’t notice that two villains went into his room in the mean time. This guy was supposed to be smart…how could he fall for the oldest trick in the book? It was pretty disgraceful so it was hard to feel bad for him when he met his inevitable demise. At least he didn’t have to live through the rest of the film so that’s something.

Overall, The Voodoo Woman is a movie that is best left forgotten. It’s not a film that is so low budget that it ends up being good. It’s just a bad film that doesn’t get any better no matter how long you continue to watch it. There are few films that are quite as bad as this one and it’s just unfortunate. I can’t say that I ever had much hopes in a film about Voodoo though. It’s certainly not the most interesting plot device out there. Ideally I won’t be seeing a film this bad again for a while, but you never know. There’s always another film around the bend that it just waiting to reach new heights and once in a while…they succeed! There’s a twist ending in this film by the way so if you somehow watch the movie, stick around for it. It reminds you that the whole thing is futile. Of course, you should watch just about any other film instead of this one. Even Pixels is a considerable improvement since it at least features an arcade.

Overall 0/10

Legend Review

Posted on January 10, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time for an old Tom Cruise film. Unfortunately, this is easily his worst and you know that a film is going to be dicey when he isn’t at least an entertaining character. How do you get Tom Cruise wrong? This film is old so it couldn’t have taken notes from Jack Reacher or Mission Impossible, but even so….I don’t know what they were thinking. This is a fantasy film that takes the fun right out of itself and instead plays out like a very low budget drama. Stay away…stay far away!

The plot starts off with Lily going to see Jack. Jack is a wild man who lives among the trees and wilderness like Tarzan. He can talk as we see later in the film, but acts like he cannot. He has virtually 0 listening comprehension and just gazes on with his mouth open for the entirety of the film. He warns Lily that she should pet the Unicorns or bad things might happen. She laughs and pets them, not realizing that as she distracts them, the villains shoot one with a poison dart. The villains take away the Unicorn’s horn, which basically stops time and bring about a snowy end for them all. Jack must stop the incarnation of darkness now before it’s too late.

The story isn’t half bad, but the execution is absolutely terrible. Again, I can’t stress enough just how bad Jack was. He’s one of the worst main characters out there when we only count ones that technically should not be bad. It’s not as if he’s a bully, villain, flirt, or anything like that. It’s just that his Tarzan imitation is taken way too far and it didn’t add anything to the film. Whatever the writers were going for simply didn’t work. It made him very unlikable and he also lost all of his charisma. Considering that Jack is the main focus of the journey, this didn’t bode well for the film.

Lily was also not a likable character. Not only did she disobey Jack’s instructions intentionally, but she just didn’t seem to care. Tossing the ring into the ocean just to see if Jack could get it wasn’t her best move either. While Lily did good in freeing the Unicorn, any seen with her and Darkness was pretty painful. Her lack of will power was certainly exposed here and it didn’t do wonders for the villain’s credibility. He had a pretty nice shadow cloak I suppose. Darkness had a great design, but the actual character could not live up to it. Not only is he too infatuated with romance over actually taking over the world, but you never really get what his goals are. I suppose he just wants to make the world a dark place, but that’s not a goal that you can easily get behind. He’s just there to be the villain, but never does all that much more.

There are other side characters, but they’re all pretty bad. You’ve got Oona the fairy, but she’s pretty annoying. Her only big moment in the film is when she tries to use her illusion magic to get together with Jack, but this luckily failed and she just flew away. There were a bunch of trolls and elves as well, but they didn’t add much to the story. The problem is that this film wanted to be a fun little fantasy adventure that would get a cult following at some point and revisits for years, but this just didn’t happen.

The film hasn’t aged well at all and ends up feeling very dated. It looked old right from the start and I didn’t even have to wait to see the effect. The scenery just looks so bad and while the snow is always fun, the film felt more like an 80’s film than a 90’s one when is comes to effects. If only it could have had the 80’s strong writing and charisma. That would have definitely gone far to help this title out. There just isn’t all that much to say about the film when it comes to positives. There isn’t really anything that the film does right and it only doesn’t get a lower score because it didn’t do anything super wrong that would warrant such a verdict.

Unfortunately, time will only make this film appear to be worse and worse. Some titles only grow stronger as your nostalgia goggles form and your old experiences of watching the film cement it as a legend. Others have the reverse effect. I have a feeling that I’ll still dislike this film just as much in 5 years and maybe more so since I’ll have no positive associations with it. What the film needs to do in order to save itself is get a reboot. Maybe it can’t save the 80’s adaption, but a 2020 remake with updated graphics and a complete script overhaul could change things quite a lot. As I said earlier, it’s not so much the plot that is the problem here, but everything else.

Overall, Legend is one of those films that you can definitely live without. Seeing Tom Cruise in one of his younger roles may make you want to see this film so that you can see if he was always a great actor, but it’s not worth it. It’s better to just keep on wondering if maybe he had a bad film back in the day, than to watch it and dispel any doubt that you had. I doubt that anyone involved with this film ever looked back and decided that it was a great film. It’s just boring and with no likable characters, that’s just not going to end well. If you want a pretty solid film with a lot of adventure and action, check out Final Fantasy: Advent Children. That one’s the ticket!

Overall 3/10

Jingle All the Way 2 Review

Posted on January 7, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time to look at the sequel that nobody even knows about. The original Jingle All the Way is classic at this point, but the sequel has been overlooked time and time again. At this point, a third film is unlikely to come out anytime soon. It’s definitely not a bad film and I thought that it was entertaining enough, but it certainly is a step down over the last film. You can tell right away that this wasn’t a theater film and the soundtrack isn’t quite as good. You can draw a lot of similarities between this and Home Alone 4, but the ending is much better here.

It is almost Christmas time and Larry wants to give his daughter Noel the best Christmas ever. The problem is that her new Step-Dad please wants to have her over for Christmas. The official system is that she switches between them every year as they alternate days, but the step Dad pulls rank. The compromise is that Larry will have her for the first half and will then bring her back over for the second half. In the week leading up to Christmas, he now has to really show Victor up. He steals her letter to Santa, where Noel asks for a super cool Teddy Bear. Larry knows what he has to do but Victor won’t make it easy.

Once again, it’s one of those cases where the contrast between the two Dads is probably exaggerated a little too much. Larry has let himself go since the marriage fell apart and now he’s super overweight. He’s not very smart and economically he isn’t doing well either. He attempts to impress Noel by connecting his car lights to the Christmas ones, but ends up losing all of his electricity so they can’t bake cookies or even have a proper breakfast. They have to settle for cereal. Larry’s a nice and likable guy, but it’s clear who we are supposed to think will give Noel a better Christmas when it comes to material goods. What works in Larry’s favor is that he has no real responsibilities and can just hang out with Noel all day. They go sledding, ice fishing, and do all kinds of stuff. Larry’s super laid back and relaxed as well with a charismatic personality so it’s easy to see why he’s fun to be around.

One thing that really hurts Larry’s case though is the fact that he’s always taking cheap shots at Victor. You never see Victor insulting Larry, but whenever Larry sees something that he can use against Victor, he takes it. “I bet Victor’s food isn’t this good right Noel?” “I bet Victor’s no fun” and he takes shots at Victor throughout the entire film. Naturally, the writers make sure that Victor jumps over the fence in the last part of the film, but otherwise, it’s hard not to be in his corner right from the start. Also, Larry cheats at games.

Sleigh bells ring…are you listening? Odds are that you’re not if you’re Victor. He’s so rich that he is hosting the town’s Christmas party this year and even buys a 10000 dollar tree. He wants to make Noel’s Christmas great so she can accept him as her new Dad. He pulls out all the stops and I wouldn’t even say that it’s to make Larry look bad. He’s just insecure and is doing everything that he can to give himself better odds. It only gets personal once he finds out that Larry is looking for a bear so he decides to buy all of them in the city. This is the only part where he goes too far as he wrecks many Christmases since everyone wanted the toy and it was a pretty dirty move. He is forced to give them back by the end and the heroes make up. So, the film wants you to go with Larry or to admit to a draw, but I’m going with Victor here. I’m not saying that money wins, but Larry had many chances, but blew them all. Victor wouldn’t have been able to buy all of the toys if Larry hadn’t slept in. Furthermore, they both (Victor’s proxy anyway) ran into a store at the same time when it opened, but Larry was outrun (Of course) and by the time he got to the toy section, they’d all been nabbed. Larry did his best after that, but he got taken into a choke hold and an Elf beat him up after that. It was rough for Larry, but at least he never gave up.

Noel was actually a lot better than Jamie from the first film. She was really understanding the whole time and took everything in stride. It was as if nothing could bring her down and the only thing that mildly upset her was how everyone kept fighting over her. She got everyone in line though and ultimately acted like one of the best kids in recent films. It’s hard to be better than her. Her Mom didn’t really have a role at all, which was surprising. She basically just watched the two Dads fight with an amused expression the whole time.

The film’s humor does occasionally wander into lower depths than the first film. Larry gets so nervous that he does something pretty sad and then makes sure to tell his friend about it. Not only is this not funny, but it doesn’t make sense. At least not for something this mild. The scene where Larry’s looking for trees and an attendant comes out to help him is also poorly handled with cringe worthy dialogue at every corner. That moment couldn’t end fast enough! Once those two moments were out of the way though, the rest of the film is fairly sound.

It certainly flew by fast and the film was just entertaining. While Larry was a little too exaggerated to allow him to be a winner here, his personality was handled well. You can still tell that he’s a nice guy as opposed to being a terrible person who just happens to be a good father. There’s a difference, trust me. His Teddy Bear fight with Victor is good as well although it naturally doesn’t beat the fist fights from the first film. I definitely think that this one held back a little too much in that regard. The action was dialed down quite a lot. Perhaps they thought that it would be bad for the kids to see or something? I get that standards have changed over time, but since the WWE helped with this film, you’d expect some action.

Overall, Jingle All the Way 2 is an admirable sequel. It may not have topped the original film, but it’s a good film in its own right. Some parts of it are fairly cheesy and don’t make sense, but that’s the problem with having this plot amidst a very exaggerated contrast. Victor’s speech about how he envies Larry’s ability to go out and have a lot of fun is just a little unbelievable. It’s a lot easier to buy into Larry’s argument since he literally cannot compete with Victor’s money. It doesn’t help that all of Larry’s attempts to do something special for Noel backfire completely. Taking a peek at her letter was also very underhanded and I like to think that Victor would not have done that although I suppose that’s not a complete guarantee. If you want a hidden star in this film, keep an eye out for Victor’s head of security. He may have thrown Victor off the bus by the end, but he did a really good job of executing the mission right from the get go. I’d recommend checking this film out. It also feels pretty fresh since I had not seen it before and adding new Christmas rosters to the collection is always a blast. No worries, it still makes for a good January film. I’d actually like to see a third film and it’d be even better if it was a crossover. They could have both families fighting over one copy of a new toy. Arnold may be old, but he still has fighting spirit and if they could get Myron back, the duo would be set!

Overall 6/10

Jingle All the Way Review

Posted on January 7, 2017 by dreager1

I’ve seen this film many times over the years, but that was before my reviewing days. I finally got a chance to rewatch it the other day and the film holds up well. It’s a fun Christmas film that you can certainly watch time and time again without the story getting stale or losing its charm and for me it’s probably the most iconic Christmas film thanks to how many times its been viewed in my household.

The film follows Howard, a rather successful business man. His problem is that he tends to forget about everything else once he’s at work and this leads to him not getting his son Jamie a gift for Christmas. He can’t afford to lose this opportunity though since tensions are already high since he missed Jamie’s karate promotion. Howard goes on the hunt for the Turbo Man toy that Jamie wants, but he will have to contend with Myron. Myron is a cynical delivery man who wants to get the toy for his son at all costs and he’s not above using cheap tactics to get it. Criminal organizations and mean spirited police officers also stand in Howard’s way, but he has the determination to keep on going. He is on the clock though since his corrupt neighbor Ted is trying to pull the moves on his wife while he’s gone. Run fast Howard!

From the start of the movie you can tell that it’s going to be a fun adventure. The clip from the Turbo Man show was pretty fun and a nice homage to the Power Rangers. Howard may have forgotten about Jamie’s event, but at least he was working while the rest of his staff was having fun at the party. Howard’s a hard working guy…things just don’t always work out very well for him. He does make it up to Jamie pretty quickly. His next mistake was maybe a little worse as he had weeks to get the toy, but forgot until the very last night. I can definitely see why it would be hard to find a toy by then, just look at the Nintendo Wii from a few years back. It was incredibly difficult to get that toy and it seemed like every store was out of stock. I pulled through of course.

The main part of the film that makes for good entertainment are the battles between Howard and Myron. First off, I have to acknowledge that Myron is the best character in the film. I’ve always had a knack for attracting people like him in real life so I’m pretty familiar with the type. He could talk about anything for days and it’ll always be complaints. One of these characters once called me a casual as a result and I just let it pass through me. I’m only a casual when it comes to my Godzilla knowledge and even then I’m mainly just a casual to get people to let down their guards. Myron is a charismatic character from the start with his speech about how toys are made to be cheap on purpose nowadays and how it’s all a conspiracy. I’m always eager to hear about conspiracies and this guy was full of them. Things escalated quite a lot from there as Myron and Howard would bodyslam each other and get into a lot of chaos.

Howard typically took the high road or at least the less painful one. Myron slammed him into CDs, blasted him with pepper spray, threatened Howard with a gun, threatened Howard’s son, etc. Howard hit him with a toy car, got a mob to tackle Myron, and slammed a door in his hand. You can easily tell who the more unhinged one is here. Myron is always ready for a truce when he’s losing though and Howard was all too ready to except the quick shot of Miller Time. It wasn’t enough to quench his thirst though.

While not quite as great as Myron, Howard’s still a good main character as well. Once he infiltrates the villain organization, he definitely gets into the fight. He’s also a quick thinker and manages to get out in one piece. His only failing is taking a shot at the reindeer. That was pretty uncalled for and he should have just run for the hills. I didn’t really mind him deciding to get even with Ted. Breaking into the house would help teach Ted a lesson before knocking him out with the toy. It doesn’t really help that Liz refused to listen to him at all during the scene though. Howard sure does drink a lot though. He went through quite a few bottles before coming back to his senses. He may not be perfect, but he can certainly hold his own film.

Ted is the worst character in the film and that’s probably intentional. He is always flirting with Liz even though she’s married. Liz probably should have gotten Howard to step in a little sooner, but at least she ultimately gave him a stern rejection. There’s not really anything good to say about Ted and his polite facade never gets all that convincing. I wasn’t a big fan of Liz either though. It felt like she was upset for about 90% of the film. If anything, Howard seemed to have a better Christmas than her even though he was the one who kept getting attacked by just about everyone. Jamie was a little worse though. I always feel like the little kids are pretty unreasonable and he is no exception. While he can’t really guess how much effort Howard is putting into the search, he isn’t making things any easier by going on tantrums. He just needs to accept the fact that Howard can’t usually keep his promises and it’ll help him learn to expect the unexpected.

There was a Cop who got a fairly large role in the film. He came across as a jerk the whole time though so it’s hard to sympathize with him when a bomb blows up in his face and his motorcycle is destroyed by Howard. The guy was basically asking for it, but I guess you can’t say that he’s not determined. The guy certainly went all out. There aren’t really any other big characters as the cast is relatively small. The rest of the people who show up are typically just people trying to make life hard for Howard. The little kid, the store owners, they all believe that this is some kind of fun joke.

Jingle All The Way has a nice soundtrack, which helps the film out overall. You’ll get to hear a nice array of classic Christmas themes as the film goes along. It’s definitely good to have and I’m always on board for that. While there are no real fight scenes to test the effects, the climax of the film plays out a bit like a real Turbo Man clip with Howard getting to take down Myron once and for all. That was a fun way to end the film and you’ll just feel bad for the actor who got knocked out by Myron. The poor guy never even saw it coming.

Overall, It’s easy to see why Jingle All The Way is such a solid film. It has rapid pacing and the writing is on point. It doesn’t take itself too seriously and embraces the battles between the two leads the whole time. The only weak part of the film is the Ted plot as it seriously did not need to be here. Liz also handled the whole thing as badly as you can imagine. She shouldn’t have let him even help set up the lights, much less be in a position to put up the Star while Howard was watching. It added the extra drama, but I don’t think the film would have changed much if he wasn’t around. Well, I definitely recommend this film. You may have missed out on the chance to see it for Christmas, but it’s a fun enough film to watch anytime. Also, it is snowing today so now might be a good chance to check it out right?

Overall 7/10

Kubo and The Two Strings Review

Posted on January 5, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time for another 2016 film to add to my list. I feel pretty modern after having watched so many of the recent hits. Kubo’s the first stop motion film that I’ve seen in quite a while. It’s still not my favorite style to say the least, but I do think that the film pushed the style as far as it could. The battles scenes are certainly the best that I’ve seen and this one definitely takes the crown as the best film of its kind. Prepare for a rather quick beginning as the best character takes the stage.

The film starts off with Sariatu fleeing from the villains, but her son Kubo’s eye is still taken. Kubo’s grandfather wants the other eye for certain reasons and Sariatu is determined not to let him get it. For years, the two of them hide in a cave in a fairly isolated area and Kubo grows up while knowing just one rule- Never stay outside past nightfall. If he ever does this, the villains will spot him and they will come to take him down for good. Kubo obeys this rule for a few years as he goes outside to entertain the inhabitants with his telepathic paper abilities, but one day he takes a little too long. He made a detour to engage in the paper lantern ritual and the villains find him.

The villains in particular are the two Aunts. They are the highlights of the film and their entrance is amazing. Their designs are easily the scariest in the film and I’d also say that they are the strongest villainss. Sariatu is basically said to be stronger than them, but they have the numbers advantage and Sariatu was seriously injured during her big fall in the intro. After the villains make their move and take Sariatu out, Kubo must now find the legendary items from his story in real life. Once he has assembled the invincible armor, he can defeat his Grandfather…the Moon King!

As I mentioned, the film starts off really quickly. It can be a double edged sword when you use up what could be the best scene in the film so quickly, but it is a surefire way to engage the audience. I knew that the Aunts would be my favorite character once they showed up and started taking names. Kubo was completely outmatched and the visuals for this really captured the intimidating aura that the villains wielded. The Aunt also returned for a second fight scene, which is the other contender for best scene in the film. She easily holds her own against Beetle, Monkey, and Kubo all teaming up. Her skills are certainly formidable and it’s a shame that she could not have appeared more. Her presence was definitely felt throughout the film though.

I was surprised at the fight scenes in general because I really wasn’t expecting all that much. Coraline and Nine are really the only other big stop motion films that I’ve seen, but neither of them really had fight scenes because it’s hard to do in this style. At the very least, you wouldn’t expect hand to hand fights with energy effects, but this one pulled it off. Whenever an energy blast or energy attack would appear, the animation could really shine. I’m not sure exactly how that works, but I imagine that they add CGI on top of the animation or use an advanced form of Movie Maker to throw the effects on top of what they filmed. Regardless, I’d say that it worked very smoothly and it definitely did help to amp up the experience.

The second half does slow down a bit compared to the beginning. After seeing the two Aunts, it’s hard to go back to trekking through the areas and fighting large monsters. I’ll admit that I was a little dismayed when the Moon King decided to shed his really cool human form in favor of that of a giant monster. It was instantly a downgrade and of course Kubo was able to slice and dice him. The Moon King should have had more confidence in his own abilities. It never gets all that slow though as every major part still adds in an action scene. The opening had the first Aunt moment, the middle had the rematch, and the ending had the battle against The Moon King. Overall I’d say that the pacing is pretty good.

Kubo is a good main character. It may have been a bit naive of him to stay out so late after all of the warnings, but maybe he was just ready for a status quo change. He certainly got that if this was the case. He acted like an ingrate for a while after meeting up with the Monkey, but eventually he got better. I also don’t totally blame him since the Monkey was being pretty mean for no reason towards the beginning. When the going got tough, Kubo took out his sword and steeled himself for battle. I’d definitely say that he did pretty good. He’s not as charismatic as the lead from Zootopia, but I’ll take him over Dory.

Sariatu is certainly strong and probably one of the stronger mothers from recent films. It’s a shame that we couldn’t get to see her fight more while at full power since she was evidently powerful. I didn’t totally get her long coma like appearances though. Especially given her later scenes and twists. I guess the injury was so bad that she had to go into those meditation esque moments, but it still felt rather odd. Certainly not her fault though and I’d say that she was the best hero.

The Monkey was a little on the annoying side. She talked tough and kept all of the vague answers to herself, but there wasn’t really much of a reason behind this. The Monkey gets a twist which actually makes the whole thing worse. Honestly, I think that the film shouldn’t have added the plot twist in. Not only does it not make any sense, but it makes all of the Monkey’s scenes out of character. The Monkey’s a good fighter though so she’s got that on her side.

Beetle barely needs any introduction as he is easily the absolute worst character in the game. It’s hard to emphasize just how bad this guy is. He’s the token comic relief character, but isn’t handled well at all and the plot twist just makes it even worse. The twist also hurts another character which is unfortunate. I just don’t know how the Beetle ended up being so bad. He can barely fight at all and he’s just annoying the whole time. He’s the kind of guy who feels like he’s always flirting and doesn’t really know boundaries so he just goes around annoying everyone. I grew tired of him minutes after he first showed up. He’s the only really bad character in the film so I was glad that he missed a lot of the first half.

Finally, we have the Moon King. He made for a pretty good main villain even if he made the risky move of turning into a giant monster. I definitely don’t recommend trying something like that when you go up against a serious main character. His motivations were a little strange. He wanted the eye so Kubo would join him in the afterlife and become a god of sorts, but in the opening scenes it seemed like he just wanted the eyes so he could see again. Is it just a coincidence that he had one eye when he first showed up? I figured that he had stolen Kubo’s so he could see again. Regardless, he was interesting and certainly strong. The scene where he just walks through the sword stab was definitely pretty hype and was sort of like a Superman moment.

Overall, Kubo and the Two Strings is a film that I definitely recommend. It has more action than you would expect and that’s always a big plus for me. It may not be the best animated feature of 2016, but from the theater ones that I’ve reviewed, it’s easily the most epic. I don’t recall any of the others having large scale mystical fights in the dead of night against denizens of evil after all. I want to see more action animated films in theaters so hopefully this one can pave the way for that.

Overall 7/10

Nerve Review

Posted on January 4, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time to look at a film where the entire premise only works if you’re one of the corrupted members of today’s youth. It’s a classic game of chicken where the main characters want to be the victors. The film’s definitely not good at all, but I have to admit that it is fairly realistic. Maybe not in how the idea is implemented, but I can totally picture a lot of people playing this game if it ever came out. It’s something that people just wouldn’t be able to resist.

The film follows a girl named Vee. She is usually pretty mild mannered and timid. While her friends go out drinking and doing a lot of wild things, Vee likes to keep it real and just be a nice person. How long does that last? Not long at all. See, there’s this new game called Nerve. Essentially, you give this very shady app access to your phone and GPS location along with the ability for them to access your bank account and do all kinds of things in your name. The up side is that you can win a lot of dollars. There are two modes to Nerve, Watch and Play. Watch means that you’ll be paying them a large monthly fee, but you’ll get to take a look at people’s private lives when they stream themselves doing the dares. They are the players. So, how does playing the game work? It’s all about how much nerve you have.

Nerve will tell you to do something and there will be a reward for it. One might say to go drink a bottle of beer for 10 dollars. Another might say to vandalize a Police Car for 500. The amounts continue to get higher, but the risks increase as well and the person who does the best can become a millionaire. All of the teenagers are into it and the ones who don’t have enough nerve to play content themselves with watching instead. After Vee is embarrassed in front of the local sports hero, she decides to join the game. She wants to be one of the cool kids and if that means embarrassing herself in front of millions of people, breaking the law, and sacrificing her morals…that’s a small price to pay for getting her 5 minutes of fame and fake friends. Vee quickly starts to rise to the top of the charts, but a shady fellow shows up to start teaming up with her and this game may have higher stakes than Vee ever thought possible.

So…where to begin. The Nerve game isn’t properly explained as you’re not totally sure who is doing the dares. For example, in one scene, Vee’s friends are able to create a dare for her on the spot. Can anyone just create a dare? That would be bad for the company since they would lose a lot of money on easy dares. It seems like a lot of ordinary citizens actually work for Nerve, but how did they get in on the loop? How did nobody find out about this and are we really supposed to believe that none of the adults know what’s happening? The ending was a clever way to end the game for good since it’ll never get quite as popular again, but you will have quite a few questions as the film goes on. This isn’t one of those films where the writing is so sharp that all of your questions will be answered.

Next, the film only works because all of the characters are so unlikable. If Vee was even a semi decent main character, she never would have gotten involved with this in the first place. Accepting a dare to kiss a random stranger is already a super suspect challenge and that was one of the first ones that Vee did. Breaking the speed limit and driving blind were also ones where you have to shake your head. Not only did Vee only complete that last challenge through plot hax, but you’d just hope that someone with common sense wouldn’t accept the task.

Again, there’s also the security aspect of it all. If someone can just throw money into your bank account, aren’t you going to be a little worried about them just taking it back later? The film’s a good public service announcement to all users about why you shouldn’t download strange apps and then attach your bank account to it. It was cool to visually see how it took all of her info though. Search Engines and Social Networks do it all the time and that’s basically how I picture it.

Lets take a break from the bashing to look at Nerve’s main theme. These films typically don’t have much of a soundtrack so it was cool to see this film have such a solid tune. Even the tagline “Snitches get stitches” was fairly catchy. The scenery was also good since the heroes were usually at or around big cities and those always look good at night. My recommendation to all films is to take place in NYC, it makes the whole thing cooler.

Back to bashing. Vee’s plan may have been clever, but it made no sense anyway. I don’t see how she could have made her plan and then told the necessary parties about it in time. Throw in the fact that she also had to get past the observers and everything and this plan was simply too unreal. It was also very convenient for Vee’s best friend Tommy to be a super hacker who knew a big group of hackers who helped to save the day. The one thing that could stop the game was a hacker after all.

Tommy was all right, but you can’t help but feel like he’s losing out here. He could be at home having fun, but instead he’s just following Vee around everywhere. She even ditches him at one point so he has to download the game before tracking her down. He’s the nice guy, but it also means that everyone walks all over him. Sydney is Vee’s other friend and she definitely doesn’t seem to have the main character’s best interests at heart. She just wants to be the most popular streamer and tries to sabotage Vee’s efforts when possible. Putting her friend on the spot while she was just trying to relax at the local pizza joint was definitely not a move that you’d expect your “friend” to make. I couldn’t sympathize with Sydney and the toxic relationship that she had with Vee was pretty bad both ways. Vee also made sure to slam Sydney live in front of millions. The film tries to act as if she didn’t realize it, but she’s playing the game…everything is on stream.

Ian is the main guy in the film and he’s certainly not going to do the film any wonders either. He wants to win at all costs and that means that he needs to encourage Vee to put her life on the line and go down the dark path. He acts as the main bad influence on Vee and he has great success with corrupting her. She doesn’t really put up any resistance since she always wanted to surpass Sydney in something and this was her chance. Ian gets a sob story to try and win you over, but I wasn’t really buying it. The guy was just annoying and unlikable the whole time.

Nerve’s just one of those films that’s not really well made. The film even resorts to using fanservice as one dare involves the main characters running around in a fancy clothing store in their underwear. It makes you wonder how far people will go for money and I like to think that the security in the store should have been able to stop them. At a place this fancy, they must have guards right? Don’t expect the cops to help all that much otherwise though since they don’t dare mess with the game. While my initial hunch about one of the cops being an undercover agent never panned out, they may as well be. They don’t believe that the game exists so they don’t feel obligated to do anything about it.

Overall, This film had a lot of potential since the idea is interesting, but it just couldn’t pull it off. Its underlying message about how people will be a lot bolder and do things that they usually wouldn’t once they have the cover of anonymity is a topic that Sword Art Online tackled more effectively. Since the characters were all pretty unlikable anyway, it’s not as if the game made them that much worse. You’ll be left with a lot of questions about the game as well and the plot convenience is certainly a bit much. If you want a similar kind of conspiracy group shaping things in the background, you should read the Liar Game manga. I can’t really think of a film that’s similar to this one, so just watch the second Tron film. It has cool music like the Nerve theme throughout the film so that’s definitely one that you should check out.

Overall 3/10

Home Alone 4 Review

Posted on January 2, 2017 by dreager1

It’s time to take a look at the next Home Alone film. Kevin’s back and we already know how good he is at stopping crooks. The problem is that the crooks do a good job of stopping themselves as it is and Kevin doesn’t have as much nerve as you’d think. It’s a solid film that is bogged down by a few elements like the villains and the unfortunate ending. There are less iffy jokes like in Home Alone 3 though so that’s a nice improvement.

Kevin is getting ready for Christmas, but it doesn’t seem like it’ll be a good one. His parents filed for divorced and his Dad immediately found the rebound character and intends to marry her as soon as possible. He wants Kevin and his two siblings to spend Christmas at his house, but the Mom doesn’t approve. Ultimately, she leaves it up to Kevin though and initially he chooses to spend Christmas with her. She then makes the really odd decision of telling Kevin to stay with his older brother for a while while she gets some errands done. Kevin tells her that he’s going to get bullied a lot, but she ignores him and leaves. Well…Kevin gets humiliated, lids slammed on him, and a whole lot of other stuff off screen and the Mom’s only response to this is to tell Kevin to go to his room and think about how much worse it could have been. Kevin imagines it all right and decides that instead of having a terrible Christmas over there, he’ll visit his Dad.

This is where the plot starts to get a little obvious and unfortunate, but lets continue. The Dad is now with a super rich soon to be step mom who is basically perfect. She has a large game room, personal attendants for everything, and the house is fully electronic. You just say something and the house will listen. Lets just add in the names so it’s easier. Kate = Mom. Natalie = Step Mom. Peter = Dad. So, Natalie is not just super rich and more fashionable than Kate, but she’s also a nicer person. Her only flaw is that she’s super successful and has to go to a lot of meetings and parties. That’s fine though, it pays the bills and helps keep them rich right? Kevin doesn’t approve though and has a bad attitude the whole time.

Marv returns from the first film and brings alone Vera to rob the place. Kevin has to stop them himself since nobody will believe him, but he does it in the worst ways possible to the point where you can’t sympathize with him. If we’re being honest, we all knew how the film was going to end from the start. Natalie would lose out since Kate has to win and the family would get back together again. It all happens as expected, but you just feel bad for Natalie. Lets think about all of the examples from the top.

Kate allowed Kevin to be bullied and was not apologetic about it at all. She wasn’t being nice to Kevin during Christmas time and her plans for Christmas were rather terrible. Meanwhile, Natalie wasn’t expecting Kevin since he declined the invitation and was ready to have a fun night with Peter, but Kevin just walks in uninvited. All right….that may have wrecked Christmas to an extent, but Natalie quickly shifts gears without batting an eye and gives Kevin a great welcome. The day is going perfectly and while Kevin’s a little ungrateful about Natalie and Peter having to leave, he lets them go. When they get back…Kevin has completely wrecked their multi million dollar mansion by flooding the entire thing with water. He did it to stop the crooks, but did he have to be so extreme? Seriously…millions of dollars gone in the blink of an eye. He ruined the entire mansion.

This is already reason enough for Natalie to get Kevin out of the house for good. Instead, she chooses to forgive and forget. This time, the party is at her house so she gets people to quickly fix it up as best they can and hopes for no disasters this time. That’s not in Kevin’s game plan though as he breaks the windows and makes a loud commotion. He freezes the butler and nearly destroys him. Next, Kevin wrecks the dinner as he throws everything at the villains, which leads to a big fall for all of the guests and things shatter. The party is completely ruined and once again, Kevin should have planned things out better.

Natalie is very upset by this point, but she is completely justified in it. It’s not as if she goes off the rails and hits Kevin or anything like that, but she finally tells him that one more “accident” like that and he’ll have to leave. That’s reasonable right? No, the film makes it a point to say that she is the villain and we should be sympathizing with Kevin right now. No, I was sympathizing with Natalie. She was being a good sport the whole time and even helped with putting the tree up. It got taken down because she had a professional company already on the way to put up their own, but that’s not a big deal. Her very small slights against Kevin were nothing compared to what he did and they weren’t even intentional. She then had to endure a painful conversation between Kate and Peter as they talk about how much fun it used to be when they were married and the old days with Kevin. Is that really a good topic to talk about in front of your new fiancee? Peter’s definitely unlikable, but more on that later.

As you can tell, Natalie had to put up with a lot. The ending just makes it even worse as all of the characters gang up on her. First, Peter decides to break up with Natalie because he wants to move back with his wife. This shows just how petty and superficial Peter is. He was glad to be with her for the money and the late night fun that they had. Once he had enough of that, he just dumped her. I mean, you’ve got to be kidding me. We’re supposed to be on this guy’s side? No way! He has the delicacy and manners of James Bond if he’s going to be like that and the film gives no indication that Natalie was not a good person at all prior to this. She was a very nice character and it just gives you the impression that Peter was using her the whole time. He got what he wanted and got out.

The next big diaster was that Natalie’s butler decided to quit. He had a very well paying job and a nice boss. Natalie was always reasonable and it’s not as if the butler had a whole lot to do. Still, he quits because Kevin tells him that he should. Natalie’s other butler turned out to be a crook as well so now she has no main employees to watch the mansion. It can’t get worse can it? I’m afraid it can as a subplot in the film was that the royal family was coming over. This was super important for Natalie since it would benefit her company quite a lot and she really needed this contract. Well, that’s out, since the prince wants to have Christmas over at Kevin’s house instead.

Lets recap. Natalie had her ultra rich mansion ruined, She had her party completely sabotaged, She lost her reputation, She lost her soon to be married boyfriend, and she lost her staff. You’re supposed to be thrilled at this “happy” ending, but it was really all just in bad taste. She was easily the best character in this film, but she ended up getting a raw deal anyway. I could go on and on and on about how she was the secret hero here and how the film’s ending is very tragic, but you get the point. Over half of this review was just on that after all.

That’s part of the reason why I couldn’t stand Kate and Peter. Peter’s obvious so we don’t need to talk about him anymore. Kate is just as bad as she is completely okay with bullying and she makes life as tough as possible for Natalie. Busting into the house uninvited was definitely not good manners and then trying to say that Kevin’s past Christmases were better is just hogwash. She doesn’t even cope well as she just spends her Christmas Eve crying in front of the TV. She’s not a good character whatsoever. Kevin’s two siblings aren’t good either as they are even more extreme than usual. They were total bullies and I didn’t buy their “suddenly nice” routine at the end. Even when Kevin was in actual danger and called for help, the brother just laughed at him, insulted him, and then hung up. There was quite a lot of bullying and people being generally mean in this film.

Kevin’s not exempt though as he’s just not a nice guy. He immediately goes into areas where he’s not allowed too just to spite everyone. He has the run of the entire mansion aside from one room so what does Kevin do? He immediately goes into that room. He panics a lot and is scared of the villains even after he was just trash talking. He goes through a ton of personality shifts the entire time and you just have to wonder what his plan is. Half of the time he doesn’t seem to know himself. He’s definitely very unlikable and comes off as an ingrate the whole time.

The villains were pretty bad as well. The film went a too far with how goofy they were. They just kept tripping and slipping up at every opportunity. The girl villain seemed as if she was always chewing on something and the guy would just get beat up by everything. Any scene with those two was a little hard to watch so I was always glad to see them not show up. They didn’t have a major role here so that was good. The slapstick definitely looks very painful here as per usual. The villains should have died multiple times, but they keep on going. At least the butler got to help a bit unlike that old lady from the last film who was heavily hinted to do something at some point, but never got around to it. It’s more of a mild consolation than anything though.

Some of the dialogue can be quite forced in the film. Kevin has conversations with his parents about their divorce and offers up his worldly advice, but then he’ll go back to being a very unintelligent kid after that. He is a very inconsistent main character and after a while you’ll start to realize that the writers just didn’t know what to do with him. It’s definitely cheesy and the parents getting back together at the end was more tragic than happy.

Overall, Home Alone 4 was a fun film. For the most part, it was even better than 3 and I was enjoying it quite a bit. It may be silly at times, but the other parts were written well. Unfortunately, the ending kind of wrecked it for me. I thought I would be giving it a solid 7, but the more I wrote this review, the more that I realized that would not be possible. The ending is just way too mean spirited and the film got its protagonists mixed up. It doesn’t really leave you with a “feels good” feeling at the end so I actually won’t recommend it. 90% of it is pretty solid, but the other 10% is enough to knock it back out. I suppose it breaks even, but just barely.

Overall 5/10

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