Tag Archives: Retro

Forbidden Planet Review

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It’s time to look at a second rate Star Trek film with a crew that certainly won’t impress you. This film was so much worse than I had expected it to be due to the terribly written romance that was included. So, to those that say this is Star Wars IV level, I have to shake my head this time. I don’t think I want any big remakes of this film and I’d rather they adapt The Invisible Boy again. That review’s coming soon so prepare yourself for it. On that note, here we go!

John and his friends command a spaceship and have been sent to an alien planet to look for a researcher who vanished here many years ago. They find him all right, but the rest of the crew has been mysteriously murdered. Hmmm, is it possible that there was some foul play afoot here? The researcher refuses to answer any questions, but the team of space cadets is attacked by an invisible monster at night. After a few space cadets are murdered, John decides to not focus on the issue all that much and focus on romance instead. Does this crew really stand a chance at accomplishing their mission?

The rest of the film would have gotten a decent 6/10 ranking if not for the romance so let’s start with that. The main heroine is Altaira and the problem is that she doesn’t really understand human culture. She doesn’t know what a “kiss” is, etc. The group naturally takes advantage of this and several (perhaps all. Given that the film hints at this by having her say “Why don’t you kiss me like everyone else” to the main character) of them kiss her. The film uses this as an excuse to have her bathing without a bathing suit because she doesn’t know what one is along with fairly dicey forms of attire. You’d think that John would be above all this since he’s the commander, but he decides to get in on the fun as well.

It’s a terrible romance because Altaira doesn’t really understand what she’s doing. The men are just tricking her for their own pleasure. John even admits that they haven’t seen a woman in a very long time so the crew will all dash at her. John says it as a warning, and yet…he’s no better. Altaira essentially has the maturity of a child and so, this romance was never going to work and it obliterated any chance that the film had of being good.

None of the human characters were likable either so that didn’t exactly help the film either. John is a terrible captain and none of his men seem to have any moral values. Altaira is way too naive and her father is cryptic and shady for no real reason. He doesn’t warn the space cadets about the monster until it destroys a few of the members and he didn’t even realize that messing with futuristic tech could destroy his mind. He’s supposed to be some kind of genius right?

Forbidden Planet also goes to great depths to show off its equipment at the expense of destroying the film’s pacing. The pacing completely dies for nearly an hour as the characters slowly walk from room to room looking at just about every single piece of equipment. They even take a quick ride around the complex, which takes around 15 minutes of real time just for fun. Maybe if the effects actually looked good it wouldn’t drag quite as much, but compared to films like Tron Legacy…this one can’t hold up.

The effects aren’t bad though and apparently they were terrific for its day. I don’t think it justifies the incredibly long wait time though. There’s not really a soundtrack, but you wouldn’t expect one for a very old film like this one. There is one highlight to the film that I haven’t really touched on yet. That’s the famous Robbie the Robot. Rob definitely deserves all of the praise that he gets because the character is very enjoyable and a bright spot amidst my other complaints. He has a nice blend of condescending smacktalk with subtle sarcasm to make him a rather deep character. He’s certainly not two dimensional and he’s very loyal as well. He is powerful and I would have liked to have seen him fight the monster, but that’s all right. The insults all make up for it. It’s easy to see why he would later return for other movies.

The monster was also decently cool. The invisibility trick was likely to save the budget, but we got some glimpses here and there and even a quick shot towards the end. I wish the monster could have appeared for an extended amount of time though. Regardless, it broke the barriers made of pure energy which theoretically should not be possible. Who knows, we may have found a rival for Godzilla after all. It’s a shame that this action part of the film could not have been a bit longer because it was easily the highlight of the film. I’m always up for more action after all and the laser fights reminded me of Star Trek. It was certainly made in that kind of style and had the film gone this route, it likely would have been a lot better.

Overall, A terrible romance is what ultimately doomed this film. It could be drawn out and a little boring at times, but it would have still doubled the score that it ultimately got here. The laser action scenes and the giant monster would make sure of it. Maybe throw in a twist about aliens arriving as well for extra tension. If you’re looking for a retro sci-fi film, you should just go and watch Star Wars Episode IV. If you do plan to see the film, at least you’ll have Robbie The Robot to enjoy. His presence in the film does help to elevate it to a certain degree. This isn’t the last that you’ll see of good ole Robbie though as my next review will feature another big appearance of his.

Overall 3/10

The Peanuts Movie Review

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It’s time to take a look at the latest Charlie Brown film that came out. This one decided to go with the comic title “Peanuts” which was an interesting move. I suppose it works as the film isn’t as centralized around Charlie as usual. He is still the main character by a long shot of course, but I’d say that this is more of a trip down memory lane than anything else. The film adapts parts from many of the older films and does its best to bring back all of the running gags as well. It’s really a trip down memory lane for Charlie Brown fans.

The main plot of this one revolves around Charlie Brown trying to work up the courage to talk to the little red haired girl. (She never gets a real name) He gets his big opportunity to do this when they are paired together to write an essay for class. She has to go back home for a bit though so it’s up to Charlie to impress her with his essay skills. Meanwhile, Snoopy continues to be attacked on the Astral Plane by the Red Baron. He’ll have to really hone his skills if he wants to make it out of this fight alive. That being said, this is Snoopy…he can handle anything that comes his way!

The Peanuts Movie really went all out to try and be like the older films. This is commendable since fans were really hoping that this wouldn’t go the Bayformers route or that it simply wouldn’t change everything for no real reason. Unfortunately, it only manages to be an imitation of the older films and doesn’t quite deliver its performance with the same amount of heart. The characters all go through the motions and act like their old selves, but it doesn’t quite work as well as the originals. A copy can never surpass the original right? Think of this situation like that.

Obviously, the animation has changed quite a lot since the old days. Rather than get better, it has unfortunately gotten a little worse. I did like the tributes to the old days as the classic animation would pop up from time to time though. That was always fun to see, but the CGI is fairly lifeless otherwise. All of the character designs are rather hollow. The CGI could have used some more sparks or something, but it is just CGI in general that always looks lifeless next to hand drawn animation. It’s not downright bad animation, just a little sub-par. There’s a decent amount of music here and the tunes are decently good. I can’t really recall any of them at the moment, but having any sort of soundtrack is always a good start for a Western animated film. It’s not much, but it’ll do to help give the film an extra kick.

Meanwhile, the film puts a great deal of emphasis on romance plots rather than focusing on the storylines that made Peanuts great in the first place. A female Snoopy character even appeared in this film to help him out against the Red Baron and it instantly turns into something romance related. That’s a shame since we certainly didn’t need more of that. It’s a Peanuts film so the romance won’t really go anywhere, but it doesn’t help the film at all either. These are scenes that could have been used for something more engaging. For example, more scenes of Snoopy actually fighting the Red Baron. Naturally, the same goes for Charlie’s plot.

Regardless, Snoopy still steals the show as per usual. His dancing skills have certainly not declined over the years and he is still an expert at everything that he attempts to do. It’s tough to surpass a natural genius who also trains at everything. Snoopy is a nice dog though and he teaches Charlie how to be cool whenever he has the time. Charlie’s a solid character for the most part as well. He always tries hard to accomplish whatever goal he has set his mind too even if he lacks confidence and can be a pessimist at times. Letting the essay get ripped was a little dicey though and I think you’ve gotta just keep that in your pocket once it is already written. Never take any chances! Charlie also acts selflessly quite a few times such as when he refused to take any credit for someone else’s test score. He’s always an honest individual who tries to help others. He may have his faults, but he is certainly a good person through and through.

As for the other characters, they’re true to form. Charlie Brown’s sister is pretty unlikable though as Charlie helps her out in a pinch during her stage performance, but she refuses to return the favor and help him learn how to dance. Charlie really could have used some assistance, but luckily Snoopy stepped in. Linus is always ready with words of encouragement and is probably Charlie Brown’s only real friend. His other “friends” still mess with him for a quarter and hold a soccer ball only to make him trick. (Well, that’s Lucy in particular) The Little Red Haired Girl seems like a reasonable character as well. She doesn’t talk all that much, but she certainly isn’t mean spirited. She’s just not around all that much unlike the other kids who seem to have unlimited free time.

Overall, The Peanuts Movie is an enjoyable experience. Technical merits are certainly not everything and the things to focus on here are the writing and the likable characters. Perhaps it tries a little too hard for nostalgia at times like Star Wars VII or even Goku and Friends Return to an extent, but a sequel would likely try to develop its own plot. I don’t think we’ll be seeing one for a while, but you never know. The romance could have definitely been played down a little, but I believe you’ll still enjoy this film. Can it beat the Christmas special? Definitely not, but maybe you’ll prefer it to the original Charlie Brown film.

Overall 6/10

Rocky Review

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You guys playing Star Fox Zero right now? Well, I’m afraid that you’re missing out on an underrated gem! The Rocky films were all a blast back in the day. They still have the best montage scenes in a live action film and it is not even close. The movies just knew how to get you excited for a fight and the soundtrack was superb. So, when I found out that they made a Rocky game for the Gamecube, I knew that I had to go pick it up. If handled right, this could be a winner. The gameplay is actually a lot of fun and the story mode actually adapts all of the films, which is really impressive. It is not a perfect title by any means, but it is definitely worth the purchase.

If you aren’t familiar with the movies, it is about a guy named Rocky. He goes from being a local underdog to the world champ. He avenges his best friend who was destroyed by a Russian boxer and then he also wins in a street fight. Your job in the game is to crush all challengers. There are 20 levels total so roughly 4 per film. Each film gets one Big fight, which gets its own cutscene and everything. That was always pretty fun and actually in a humorous way at times with the voice acting. Giving a cutscene to some of the other fights would have helped to break the monotony that the rest of the story had. After all, let’s face it, it isn’t all that exciting to fight yet another random challenger after a while.

I will give the game some props for fully embracing the repetition though. Each fight plays out in exactly the same way. First we get to hear each fighter’s theme. Then they are introduced and the fight begins. Afterwards, you get to relisten to the victor’s theme one more time. It is very entertaining. You can also beat most of the levels while only using two attacks, but don’t let your guard down. The difficulty will randomly jump up at some points before heading back down. I ended up losing 2-3 fights, but then I would proceed to teach my opponent a lesson.

The gameplay is what you would expect from a classic boxing game. You have an array of punches and moves that you can use here. High, Low, and Medium blows. You can faint and move around to dodge. I never figured out how to block, but I’m sure that there is a button for it. There must be right? Once you take out the opponent’s health bar, they have 10 seconds to try and get back up. Usually the CPU will get up twice in a set at the most. Maybe a third time if the fighter is tough. If you knock an opponent down three times in a single round, then it is an auto win for you. Getting up on your own is a lot tougher though, so good luck trying to rise 3 times.

As hinted at earlier, you will hear a lot of victory themes and various popular songs throughout the game. It gives the title a certain amount of hype. In the actual matches you are unlikely to notice the music. Thus, I’d say that the soundtrack is good, but not great. Graphically, it is a similar story. This certainly cannot be called great, nor can it be called bad. The game did a fine job of recreating the characters from the films. Each attack was designed well and I didn’t really notice any attack cloning here. Of course, the attacks are all very similar as it is. Character wise there are definitely some clones, but they make sense. Having a version of Rocky for each film was certainly genius and paves the way for crossover fights that we could only dream of back in the day. I think the graphics definitely could have been a little brighter, but I still give them a passing grade.

The campaign is fairly short so you may be wondering what replay value is available. Well, there is essentially nothing extra in the campaign so multiplayer is your only option. If you find someone who enjoys the game as well, then you will have quite a lot of replay value here. On your own you may have fun with it for a few hours, but ultimately it won’t last. I suggest buying this game for a good price. Of course, quality does defy quantity right? Not every title can pull a Super Smash Bros and accomplish both.

Overall, Rocky is a fun game. It is best to think of this one as your average popcorn fun rental. It is the kind of game I could picture someone renting for the weekend to play for a little while. That probably isn’t an option anymore though, so you gotta buy it or forget the title. Faced with those options, I’d recommend grabbing this title. It is a good game even if it won’t last you all that long. It is definitely a special treat for Rocky fans with how accurate the whole thing is. The final boss even feels a little special since it is a real battle as opposed to an official boxing match. Train your skills and then go on to become the world champ in this title. Embrace the experience because we may never get another Rocky game ever again. A truly somber thought.

Overall 7/10

Polar Trappers Review

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It’s time for the final Disney special that I’ve seen so far. This one features the long awaited team up between Donald and Goofy. I can’t say that I’m a big fan of Goofy. His character gimmick of not being too smart has been done more successfully by other characters like Knuckles from Sonic Boom. That being said, he was a little better here than I had expected. Goofy tries to capture some fish alive so he can take them back somewhere while Donald wants to eat Penguins for Brunch. Think of it like Batman V Superman with the moral dilemmas of this. Goofy gets a pretty neat song about how he catches them and keeps them alive. It was pretty hype and you feel bad for Goofy since he had better motives than Donald here, but still gets soundly defeated by nature in the end.

As for Donald, he’s essentially the antagonist here. He’s always trying to stir up some trouble and make life a little dicey for the Penguins. Luckily, they were onto him and his plans were spoiled yet again. He should have just kept on eating the beans right? I do like beans quite a bit, but they are one of the few foods that I actually would get bored with so I can totally sympathize with Donald’s reluctance to eat them. I can’t sympathize with his plan to eat a Penguin though. As with the other two specials, the animation is nice and smooth here. It’s a neat coincidence that all three specials took place with a lot of ice and snow. I suppose if it works, it works right?

Overall, It was neat to see the two heroes team up. “Hero” is a bit of an ambitious term for these two characters though. It was good to see the Penguins put them in their place as they reminded the main characters of who was really in charge here. It’s not quite as good as Corn Chips, but I’d say that it beat Rescue Dog. Once again, the short is only a few minutes so you’ll be able to blast through it in no time. I can definitely see the appeal of a good short as well, it is easy to just plug it in and watch without making a long time commitment. It’s a good style for telling stories as long as there is no really big plot.

Overall 6/10

Rescue Dog Review

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Rescue Dog is an old Disney special/serial from a very long time ago. Pluto’s the main character and he is really put through the ringer in this one. He underestimates Disney’s version of Jerry and pays the price. As Pluto cannot talk, it plays out like a silent film. The little Penguin who humiliates Pluto during the entirety of the short is a pretty good character. He may have defeated Pluto, but he still decided to help him out when the stakes became lethal. That’s a good rival to have.

The animation is smooth and looks good as the segment goes on. It is still very impressive to consider the fact that the animation tops that of some 2016 films. Disney definitely knew how to draw. The icy backdrop makes for a good locale in the special. Typically I prefer a bustling city myself, but the arctic can work wonders as well. Just look at Super Android 13, the DBZ film. We get a lot of action in the film since Pluto and the Penguin….Seal really duke it out for a little while. They chase each other up and down trees and it’s all very intense, but there can only be one winner and we know who that is.

Overall, this special is under 10 minutes. It is shorter than an Arthur segment so there is no time to really dislike it. Likewise, it won’t win any awards from me either. It’s a decent way to spend a few minutes and there is nothing wrong with the plot. I think it would have been better with more enjoyable characters, but at least there were no bad ones. If you like Pluto then that will help the short quite a bit. I like Pluto more than Goofy, but I’d certainly prefer to see Donald or Mickey take the spotlight. Those characters are the ones who really put Disney on the map after all. I’ve got two more animated short reviews coming up so stay tuned!

Overall 6/10

A Boy Named Charlie Brown Review

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It’s time for another Charlie Brown film! This is the big one since it’s what really got the ball rolling for the Peanuts, but it’s actually not quite as good as the legendary specials like Christmas or Thanksgiving. The main reason is that the film tries to artificially extend the run time so that it can be a feature length film. This involves some rather odd musical scenes that aren’t bad, but they aren’t all that good either. In the end, it’s still a fun film though.

Charlie Brown is pretty sad because the Baseball team always loses on account of his bad play. It’s not just him as none of the other characters know how to play either, but the instant he isn’t around the team finally manages to get a win. That’s okay, Charlie has bigger things to worry about now. He is going to enter the big spelling bee to prove that he is the best in the entire planet. It’s a tough job, but someone has got to do it so it may as well be good ole Charlie.

It’s a pretty peaceful adventure as you would expect. As mentioned earlier, the one iffy part here is the fact that the film evidently couldn’t last as long as the writers wanted it too without a little help. This results in the odd dance numbers where the characters just run around if they’re on screen or you’ll just see some crazy visuals. It felt like something out of Serial Experiments Lain, but without the depth and interpretative visions. It’s a lot more entertaining than 2001 A Space Odyssey, but nothing happens so it is really just a time for you to walk away, grab a snack, and then come back. The fact that this happens more than once is another problem altogether.

Again, it doesn’t really hurt the film all that much, but it is enough to push it under the classic specials. On the bright side, this could be Charlie’s best appearance yet. Sure, he may not have won the spelling bee, but he actually gets pretty far and proves that he is one of the best memorization experts in the whole country. Charlie wasn’t super smart from the get go, but he tried and tried until he made it. He’s still as gullible as ever when it comes to letting his friends trick him, but you can’t be perfect.

He’s also got allies who help him get that far. Linus gives him a blanket to help Charlie focus and Snoopy saved Charlie’s bacon when it was crunch time at the first regional. qualification test. Imagine getting knocked out of the tourney before it even begins. Yeah, Snoopy’s definitely a pal and someone that you want to have in your corner. As per usual, Snoopy steals the show here. He is a pro at everything that he tries and he helps Linus navigate through the city at night even if the kid isn’t all that grateful for the dog’s efforts.

The rest of the characters aren’t all that supportive of Charlie during this endeavor. Nobody even comes out to greet him after he gets back home, which shows where their priorities are. Well, all you really need are Linus and Snoopy as pals anyway. Charlie can also get some advice for 5 cents as well so he’s pretty well off. It is tough to imagine being the reason why your team loses every single game for years though. That’s got to be eating away at Charlie’s confidence since he practices so much, but still lets the other team win. I’m waiting for the film where he actually excels at everything and has a perfect day only to find out that it was all a dream. That’d be pretty hype.

As per usual, the animation is pretty fluid and consistent. The series has always had a very distinctive style that works well for it. I wouldn’t mind seeing a black and white Charlie Brown adventure. I think it would work pretty well in this style and could even look visually more interesting although the dream sequences certainly wouldn’t be as good. It’s definitely a bit of a pros and cons kind of angle. There are a bunch of songs and themes as well. They aren’t quite as memorable, but I remember them being fairly good/decent. They certainly don’t hurt in case you were a little worried about that happening.

On another note, these kids sure do get a lot of freedom. Charlie Brown gets his own hotel room and Linus is able to travel through the city in the dead of night. Back in the day things were definitely safer so people could wander around, but it also fuels my theory that Charlie Brown is actually about a group of college students and the animation just makes them look small. The blurry voices? They still belong to the adults and teenagers just can’t understand anyone who has exceeded a certain age. There are a number of fairly decent theories you could make about the series, which is always fun to do. Of course, I would not want a live action film to go that route.

Overall, A Boy Named Charlie Brown is a good film. It serves as a decent introduction to Charlie Brown’s character in case you haven’t seen the other specials. As far as Charlie’s plots go, the Spelling Bee was definitely one of his better ones. My favorite is probably still Charlie trying to read Love and Peace. He typically has the best plots in each of the specials/films, but that makes sense when you think about it. The main character should always be the highlight right? Otherwise, why would the films be called…Charlie Brown? Peanuts would have been a nice title, but I actually prefer it this way. If you want a fairly uplifting story with an emotional climax, this is the film for you!

Overall 6/10

Galaxy Quest Review

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I saw this film a while back, but the review has been in limbo for quite a while. I’m always up for a parody even if they can get a little dicey at times. This one is pretty well done for the most part, but it still does have enough dicey moments and plots to hold it back quite a bit. The bright side is that this film is much better than some older Sci-Fi films like The Forbidden Planet. The bad side is that it’s no Star Trek and the parody should always be better than the original.

The plot revolves around Peter. (Again?) Well, Jason to be more specific, but he played Peter in the Star Trek parody show and it still has a very strong following among its fans. The problem is that the show was too popular and aliens from other solar systems have seen it as well. A group of them come to Earth to enlist the aid of the actors who they believe to be the real characters. Jason naturally agrees since he loves to be in the spotlight, but his comrades are a lot more reluctant. Jason may have been good in the show, but can he really hack it against a group of tyrannical aliens who have come to destroy everything that we know and hold dear? It’ll take a lot of gusto to hold these guys in check!

First, I’ve definitely gotta say that the TV show looks pretty hype. It definitely feels like Star Trek, but possibly with higher stakes. I wouldn’t mind seeing a movie that adapts the actual show rather than showing the real world. As it stands, the actors…range from good characters to iffy ones although luckily none of them are downright terrible or even really bad, which is good.

The best member is easily Alexander. He really disliked his role in the TV show and tries to forget it, but that task is incredibly difficult when the fans always recite your famous lines. He dislikes the fans and isn’t afraid to show it, but Jason always plays on his ego. Alexander wants to be a great stage magician or something like that so he must answer the curtain call or he’ll be a fraud. Towards the end he lives out some of his lines and learns the values of friendship, but I’ll definitely miss his cynical/dramatic self from the opening.

Jason’s the lead and well…he’s a little dicey. He’s actually similar to the Peter from Men In Black Alien Crisis, but he’s a little less obvious and also doesn’t seem as far gone. We learn through exposition that he basically was like Kirk and he flirts with Gwen a lot during the film, but luckily he is typically shot down. I was glad that he actually took the alien situation in stride and talked tough to the villains even if he thought it was a dream. He certainly has more guts than the rest of the crew so it is one of those cases where he has a lot of good traits, but tries to balance himself out with bad ones. It’s not as extreme as it could have been though.

Gwen’s a decent character although the film sadly uses her for fanservice on more than one occasion. One scene in particular makes no sense as her outfit just happens to rip during the climax. It’s a shame since her other gimmick of repeating the computer was a pretty original one. I think her character would have been fine with just that one trait. Gwen lacks the charisma that Jason and Alexander have, but she’s better than Fred. Fred was a decent character, but his romance at the end really was unneeded and wrecked his emotionless front. He would typically just go along with whatever plan Jason thought of and that was also enough for his character. I think the film just went overboard with how much personality it wanted each member to have.

Unfortunately, the same can be said for the alien allies as well. They all have very annoying voices and their lack of knowledge about Earth can also drag on and on. I’ve never liked the trope of aliens not knowing Earth’s customs which makes them look bad for long periods of time. We get that they don’t know about Earth, but there’s no need to dwell on it. The sounds that the alien allies make when they panic can also be annoying and it doesn’t grow on you the same way that Chewy’s roars do. I just didn’t like any of the allies from the get go. If they were less naive and a little more hardcore then that could be different, but at it stands, they needed more vigor and gusto.

The main villain is fairly decent. He’s a little on the generic side of course, but the main thing that matters is that he has a cool design and he can fight. He isn’t here to ask for help from the humans and he doesn’t back down to their threats either. His army is also pretty intelligent and there was a pretty big shock moment towards the end as the villains took the ship. It’s a good thing the heroes are in a place that houses a legendary weapon with an unknown power. I can definitely buy into that twist and I wouldn’t even call it all that plot haxed. Well…okay, there was plot hax involved.

Now, I can buy the fans figuring out the true purpose of the device, but how? The explanations in the film that were given were unsatisfying to be honest and this may be a parody, but I still want to know how the deux ex machinas are known to the general public. It was great to see the fans getting their props and it proves my age old theory that sometimes the fans know the characters better than the writers. A little plot hax never hurt anyone and it doesn’t hurt the film either, but it’s something to think about. Hopefully the main characters will keep this in mind the next time they have a press conference.

A sequel dealing with the fallout from this film could also be fun. After all, they probably suspect that aliens exist now since a spaceship was launched in the middle of the awards and Jason actually disintegrated an alien. It’s easy to play off the alien as a trick, but the spaceship? I don’t think so. A sequel with the government recruiting the cast into their space program to fight off some invaders would be pretty hype even if a reboot is probably more likely at this point.

Overall, Galaxy Quest is a decent parody. It certainly has its flaws, but I’d still call it a “decent” film in the end. This is a classic one and done film as you’ll never need to re watch it. It has enough solid moments to keep it afloat and Alexander definitely steals the show even if you end up feeling bad for the fans at some points. They didn’t ask for this! They just wanted to have a good time, but they really took a verbal beating at times. The romance can be iffy and the characters can be dicey, but the film never goes too far with these points. The part that made this film get to a 5 was the alien allies and I think they were just enough to tip it down. It all adds up of course, but they were the main culprits. I could recommend this to you all to watch, but you may be better off checking out Star Trek Into Darkness! That film has the right blend of action and hype!

Overall 5/10

Alpha Flight Classic Volume 3 Review

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It’s been quite a while since I reviewed a comic hasn’t it? I admittedly read this a very long time ago at this point, but better late than never. The Alpha Flight has always been a fairly obscure team in the grand scheme of things and I can see why. I like just about all of Marvel’s retro comics and this one’s no exception, but it’s not exactly a page turner either. You’ll read through the adventures, but at the end of the day, a story about just about any other character would be more interesting. The team needs to either make the characters cooler or they should just add some new members. Either method would help to improve the comic series I’d say.

There are quite a few plot points here. One of them I had actually seen already. Due to the Hulk getting everyone mad at him once again, Dr. Strange banished him to the Crossroads. He was not thrilled, but at least he can’t hurt anyone there. Unfortunately, Box (Member of Alpha Flight) decided to help Sasquatch since he needed a new body but the probe brought back the Hulk, which lead to a devastating battle against the beast. As always, Hulk basically humiliated Alpha Flight, but I’ll give them some props for the effort. They gave it their all after all.

One of the big arcs is the one from the cover. The interesting part is that the cover spoils the big twist about the Guardian not really being the genuine article. Even I thought that he may have been real for a few seconds despite that, but it’s still odd. That was the best arc of the collection for sure. Omega Flight are the main villains and you can tell that there’s a lot of history between them and Alpha Flight. Their members seem fairly interesting as far as there abilities are concerned. I can’t say the same for their personalities, but that’s another story altogether. These guys were out of their depths, but they gave Alpha Flight a good fight and spiced up the collection a little. I’m always ready for a villain group that can be a nice counterpart to the heroes. Just look at the Crime Syndicate of America, even if Forever Evil really dropped the ball on this one by not letting the JLA fight them. Come on, the whole point of a group like that one is to watch Ultraman get to fight Superman. You’re throwing away easy money by not having that fight on screen!

Let’s talk about the characters. For the most part, each one gets a plot during this adventure, but most of them aren’t really interesting and don’t add much to the experience. Shaman is the wise member of the group whose mystical abilities let him get the team out of a hard spot once in a while. That being said, he loses his motivation after Talisman calls him out for tricking her into being a hero and who can blame her? There’s little reason to feel sympathy for Shaman and he’s under the weather for almost the whole collection. He’s just not a good character and if it wasn’t for the Beyonder, Talisman would be dead. Talisman got thrown into her Alpha Flight life and wasn’t prepared the way that the others were. She probably could have handled the whole thing a little better so lets not sugercoat things here, but she’s not a bad character. She can be a bit hard on Shaman, but he did permanently change her life and involved her in a game where the stakes are lethal, the superhero game. There’s little time for her to become a truly interesting character.

Puck is probably my least favorite member of the group and that’s saying something. It seems like he’s always looking for romance or at least pretending too as one scene hints that it’s all just an act. Either way, it’s an act that won’t help his character arc and his abilities are basically pointless in a fight so this guy needs an upgrade and fast. Heather is the new leader of the Alpha Flight since Guardian is gone, but I can’t say that she does a great job of it. She panics when Guardian appears out of nowhere and faints during a crucial moment which allows Omega Flight to fully infiltrate the base. The other members don’t respect her authority so she needs tyo find a way to get them in line. One problem with this is the fact that she has no powers and isn’t exactly at Batman’s level of hand to hand combat. I feel like the leader of a team has to at least be decently strong so maybe she really isn’t cut out for the job. At the very least, she needs to get over the Guardian’s passing and get a grip on the situation before it’s too late. Box can’t walk so he has to rely on a robot suit, which is definitely a rough deal. I’ll give him credit for never complaining about it and accepting the risks when in combat. If his robot body were to break, there’s a good chance that his psyche would as well so entering every battle can be dangerous.

Snowbird finally became a super powerful figure in these issues, which was interesting. Unfortunately, it also came at the expense of her personality as she became a little more distant and cold towards the other members. It’s hard for them to team up anymore because it’s hard to even trust Snowbird. Her new abilities are useful though and now she can attain the strength of the creatures that she turns into. She would really help the team now, but she quit right away so that she could learn what it means to be human. It’ll be interesting to see if this helps her to act more like her old self or if the new personality is here to stay. I’m fine with a distant Snowbird, but she may become a villain if she’s not careful.

Sasquatch gets a subplot with Aurora, but it doesn’t do anything for either of them. Sasquatch seems decently reasonable, but he should realize that Aurora barely cares about him as she’s always flirting with everyone else and really seems to have no class. Sasquatch can be a little mopey at times, but he’s not a bad member. I just feel like he made the wrong choice here. Aurora has a split personality so she’s almost like two characters. The problem is that none of them are likable. We have the really independent and free persona who is really terrible and then there’s the super timid form who can’t make any decision on her own. Both of them are annoying in their own right and she can’t really fight all that well. Her powers actually stop when she makes contact with Northstar due to an “upgrade” that she got so fighting solo is her only option now.

Northstar is portrayed as the rebel of the group. He quit the Alpha Flight and hasn’t looked back since. He likes his new status, but the Alpha Flight find him anyway and basically force him into some new battles. Aurora even calls him out for a crime that he committed over a decade ago. He really can’t get any peace. Northstar can be over the top sometimes, but I definitely have to say that he’s a lot more likable than the other Flight Members. She’s not a part of the group, but I have to give a shoutout to Pink Pearl. She has no super powers except for the fact that she is massive so she has the physical power of someone like the Blob. It’s hilarious to see her beat down the Alpha Flight. Just when I thought that the team couldn’t call any further…they ended up surprising me!

The art was solid. It had the retro feel that Marvel’s comics all had at the time. The fights are all easy to read and the character designs are spot on. You can always count on Marvel to deliver in this area and while the Alpha Flight stories may not have been the greatest, the art was still quite good. It’s a fairly short collection although not too short to the point where it’ll feel like half of one. There are a decent amount of comic and it makes for a more complete read when put next to the usual 4 issues.

Overall, This is a good comic book. It’s just not much better than good though and you could do better with just about any other title from back in the day. If you want a break from all of the super popular heroes though, then this is a nice change of pace. It still references those other teams, but it stays as a self contained collection for the most part. I wonder if these guys will ever get a film. Considering that so many heroes have gotten a title by now, I wouldn’t be totally surprised. Either way, you can expect my next comic review to be about a comic that’s a little more impressive!

Overall 6/10

Casablanca Review

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Does the poster spoil the ending? Let’s hope not, although this is a classic so you’ve probably seen it already. If not, then I’d recommend checking it out. It’s not an elite all star film like you may have heard, but it’s a good story. The romance is rather lackluster though and downright bad by the end. Press 1 if you feel bad for the Rebound Guy who shall never know his own fate. This film’s definitely been remembered for many generations and will always stay as a classic so let’s see what the film theoretically did right and what it may have done wrong.

The film takes place during the time where Germany had occupied France. Rick has a little bar that’s going smoothly, but that’s when some Germans arrive looking for a resistance member. Rick has attained a pair of passports that can let the resistance member safely escape the country, but he doesn’t want to give them up because he now has the opportunity to destroy the woman who gave him the slip many years ago and crushed whatever romance they may have had back in the day. Rick never forgets a grudge, but will he ultimately decide to put his feelings to the side so that he can help stop the Nazi’s?

Rick really had a good thing going for him, but Laszlo and Ilsa’s appearance throws a curveball into his life. We rarely know when we are about to make a choice that will alter our life forever, but have to do the best that we can. Of course, it’s hard to just help an old enemy so easily and Rick is naturally upset. Worse, the Nazi’s now know that he has a history of helping the resistance stop the oppressors so he has come under great scrutiny. He’s on friendly terms with the chief of France’s police, but that might not help him all that much if the Germans really do start to go after him.

Rick’s a classic retro hero who’s very confident and can casually respond to the enemy banter. He’s not a bad main character and is far more likable than the leads of the last few films that I watched. He does make things very dangerous for the other characters for most of the film, but ultimately makes the right choices….for the most part. He helps some people flee the country and does help the resistance. The one wrong choice that he made was having a one night affair with Ilsa even though he knew that she was married.

I’m referring to near the end as he didn’t know that she was married the first time. That one was on her, but he certainly could have simply denied her the last time, but chose to accept her offering before sending her on her way. It was not a good move and Rick proved that he was not as heroic as he could have been. The wise thing to do there would have been to have just given them the passports if he had been planning to do so or to have gone along the plan without that move. It also makes things sad for Laszlo.

Unlike some of the other guys, Laszlo may realize that he is the rebound guy, but it’s definitely not a whole lot better for him. Knowing that you are the rebound guy must be incredibly hard to bear and honestly it can make you doubt everything. It’s one of the reasons why you should be incredibly careful when choosing your partner. It’s so that you can actually trust her when you have to be gone for a few months. In the beginning, Ilsa thought that Laszlo was dead of course so it’s not as bad. Of course, what you could say is bad is the fact that she got over it so quickly and moved on to another man. Why are the characters all so easy? It would probably be even worse if this was a modern film. At least the romance is handled tastefully for the most part….the last romance scene notwithstanding.

It’s a fairly pleasant film and one of those well written films that you don’t really see nowadays. The characters all come across as intelligent and even when they’re threatening each other it’s always very civil. Naturally it can be a little long for some as not everyone will enjoy the long conversations, but given the positive reviews around the board, I think it’s safe to say that most people enjoyed the interactions. They’re definitely solid and the film never dragged on for me because it was all very interesting. It would have been great to have had a quick epilogue where some Americans came in to take down all of the Nazi’s, but maybe that would have taken too long.

The film did a good job of throwing in some context and backdrop for the characters. Even though the film had to get into the plot right away, you got a good sense of the town and the people there. They may have been beaten, but they weren’t broken and they were still fighting hard to stay upbeat. The scene where they play their anthem over the German one was definitely a good one and watching everyone talk about how they wanted to leave was a nice subtle way of showing the condition over in Paris. We never actually saw that the conditions were poor, but still knew it through this, which is a solid way of expanding the universe. Subtlety can definitely be a great tactic.

Overall, Casablanca is a good film that lives up to its reputation as a solid romance. It’s not world shattering, but I’m not a big romance fan so it equals out. Aside from the needless romance scene between Ilsa and Rick (A romance that I definitely don’t think is award worthy) the film really didn’t have any flaws and made for an enjoyable experience. It’s a fairly calm film with very few action scenes, but it’s meant to be more about the choice that Rick has to make. Will he make the right one or won’t he? I’m glad to say that he did make the right choice and turned out to be a decent person. There was even some room for a sequel where we could see Rick in the resistance. That would be neat although it could be sad if handled wrong. If you’re looking for a pleasant romance then this is a good film to check out.

Overall 7/10

Sunset Boulevard Review

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It’s time to review a very retro film. It’s one of those films that may have a lot of good reviews, but when you really take a look at it…it doesn’t hold up very well. The characters are all very unlikable and the romance is one of the worst that you’ll have seen in years. It almost makes Twilight’s look good, but that’s just about impossible anyway. The sun did set on this film, but I don’t think that was the film’s intention!

Joe’s a film writer who’s been through some tough times. None of his scripts are any good anymore and he gets serious writer’s block at times. He’s also on the run from the proper (car) authorities since he couldn’t pay the bill on his car. Things are really heating up and he even considers moving across the state, but that’s when he runs into the retired actress, Norma Desmond. She has a lot of money and is willing to help him become rich if he can help her finish her script so that it becomes a real movie. Joe can never pass up quick check, but is this really the right move?

No, I can say that it isn’t the right move, but Joe’s not a good character so I wasn’t expecting him to make the right one anyway. It wouldn’t have been in character now would it? The romance is poorly done here on all levels, but first let’s start with the subplot that comes out of nowhere. The person (Betty) who read Joe’s scripts decides that he has a lot of talent and wants him to help her write a script. He declines, but eventually decides to do it. The problem with this plot is that Betty is engaged, but she immediately falls for Joe anyway, nearly getting together with him in the bathroom of a party after only seeing the guy for about 2 minutes. Keep in mind that she’s already engaged. Once her fiance heads over to another state for some kind of project, she quickly tries to make her move and Joe is naturally happy about this. The problem is that he’s playing the field with two people at once.

So, Joe decides to break it off with both. Before we say how, let’s go to the main plot. Norma Desmond is a lot older than Joe of course, but that doesn’t stop her from flirting with him and since Joe knows that she’s the source of his weekly pay check, he obliges her. He continues to let this relationship happen and even allows her to believe the deception that she may make a comeback as an actress. That’s why we invented the concept of tough love as these passive lies will definitely hurt a person in the long run. Naturally, this isn’t a very healthy relationship and Norma has divorced 3 husbands in the past so that should have been a good hint to Joe.

Anyway, his decision to break off his relationships to both Norma and Betty involves calling Betty over to see his mansion and then dumping her…after having her come over all the way from her house in the dead of night. Couldn’t have broken it off over the phone right? He also did it in a passive aggressive way so as to not formally break it off, but just antagonize her until she got the message. Then, after giving Norma hope that she was the only one for him, he quickly told her that he was leaving as well and after making sure that she had a gun at the ready, he walked away. Naturally he got shot in the back and quickly sprinted over to the pool so that he could have a flashy death, but it was a predictable end to the film.

After all, the movie made the interesting choice of showing him dead in the very first scene as he tells us a flashback. It’s not explicitly stated that it was him of course, but it’s rather obvious since there were no other characters who looked like him in the film. It was a very small cast after all so there was never a doubt as to how the film would end. The only question would be “Why was he shot?” Well, now we know the answer. The guy wasn’t exactly an upstanding citizen and you can only antagonize people for so long before one of them turns out to be a killer. At least the finance guys finally got their car back from him.

The cops show up at the end to wrap everyone up, but they’re not as tough as the cops from nowadays. They allow Norma to slowly walk down the steps and act as if she is still in a movie instead of quickly throwing her in the cop car and getting on with it. The reporters are always glad to have an extended scene like this of course, but they certainly have her a lot of leeway. Considering that she just killed a man, you’d expect a little more intensity from the cops right?

There’s not much to really like about the film. As I’ve already shown, Joe’s a terrible main character. He has no heroic qualities about him. The only part of his personality that is decent is the fact that he gets a lot of burns and insults the entire time as he pokes fun at everyone, but it’s always just talk. He talks about how he should leave Norma and yet he doesn’t make a move until the very end. He’s not actually brave enough or confident enough to make a move and the only times that he does try something are when they’re actions that he shouldn’t take. One such action is naturally trying to steal the girl of his best friend. That’s not a whole lot of loyalty on his part.

If he would focus more on his writing and less on all of the fluff that’s around him, he could have been a real character. As it stands, he’s not someone that you’ll want to be around and I can see why his scripts were no good. He doesn’t take them seriously enough. It’s a shame since the beginning of the film did show some promise and the overall picture could have been quite good. If the story was played seriously and Norma did not fall for Joe we could be talking about a completely different movie. Who knows, maybe this could have actually been a solid 7 instead of the finished product that we got in the end instead. Alas, there are no what ifs when it comes to film right?

Overall, There’s no shining sliver of hope to grab here as the film’s just one big mess that gets more and more entangled in its own plots. Now we’ll also know that the best friend was just the rebound guy even though he’ll never suspect it as his engaged partner will likely never mention these facts. It’s one of the tricky turns of romance and a lot of films actually don’t mind making the guy just the “rebound guy” anymore. Even the next film that I’m about the review used the same technique and it does make you wonder for the eventual husbands who have to put up with this role. You just have to wonder what they would think if they knew. They probably should have realized that if anyone is easy enough to fall for you at first sight, that they may have already done the same for others. Just think on that as you pass by this film at your local DVD store and instead stop at Yugioh 3D Bonds Beyond Time. No drama there, just hard hitting action!

Overall 1/10