The Doctor vs Chell

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Suggested by iKnowledge The Doctor is a skilled strategist who can fight when necessary. While Chell’s portal gun may be difficult for most fighters to counter, The Doctor is one of the few guys around who would have the equipment needed to deal with it. His screwdriver could break the gun if he gets in close enough and The Doctor is fast enough to catch her and break it. Chell is strong in her own right as well but not nearly strong enough to clutch out a victory here. Ultimately she will fall. The Doctor wins.

Free Guy Review

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Free Guy definitely got a ton of promotion and hype when it was coming out. The movie really looked to be throwing in tons of references and fun gaming moments into its adventure and Free Guy did deliver on that. It’s also always a cool concept to find yourself inside of a game. It may not be life and death stakes for most of the characters like in Sword Art Online but it still gives you that fun feeling of actually being inside a game. So while Free Guy could have been better in some areas, I would definitely say it’s a good film.

The movie starts with a day in the life of Guy. He lives as an NPC in the Free City game. His duty is to be a bank clerk who helps people get their money before being held up by a random crook every day. He doesn’t realize that this is strange though as that’s just how life works. He doesn’t even know that this is all a game since it feels real to him. Well, one day he wants to talk to one of the people wearing glasses (a user) and figures he just needs a pair of his own. He grabs them and this changes his life forever. He can now see the world as a player does.

Meanwhile, Millie is trying to track down some code which will prove that Antwan and team corporate actually stole the game that she and Keys created in order to get mega rich. The issue is that the code could be anywhere and she has had no luck finding it so far. If she doesn’t find it before the sequel comes out then she will really be out of luck. Perhaps Guy is her last chance. After all, as a player from inside the game, perhaps he will be able to see a new perspective. She better hope this is the case as there won’t be any second chances.

I have to say that the actual world of Free City looks like a blast to play in. It’s got a very Grand Theft Auto feel to it but with even more to do. I’d say there’s even a bit of Fortnite inspiration in this as you create walls to run and jump on. Of course, that seems to be a power limited to admins, I can see how that might be overpowered in a GTA setting otherwise. You can choose whether you want to live peacefully in the game or attack people. I imagine most would do the latter, but it could make playing the hero role fun since you will always be outnumbered.

As for Guy, he’s very much a Lego movie kind of lead. He has a perfect life right now and doesn’t even think about anything grander until it arrives at his doorstep. From there Guy does a good job of adapting and becoming a true lead in his own right. He is fairly skilled and has a whole lifetime of experience which explains why he is so good at navigating through the town. He may be a bit slow on the uptake of this all being a game but like with Truman, I can cut him some slack there because it is really hard to jump to the conclusion that your whole world is fake. Realistically that would be hard to buy at first but he does start to catch on when he sees how everyone always acts in the same way.

Free Guy is at its best when it’s about Guy just living his life and having a good time. The Mega Buster cameo was a blast as well as the Avengers reference. When the film is just going all crazy like this you’re really going to be engaged with what’s going on. The film has a lot of funny moments and the pacing is on point as well. Since Guy’s such a likable main character, the film is off on the right foot there. The soundtrack also has some fun songs. It may not be a huge soundtrack but it gets the job done.

The film’s at its weakest when it’s focusing on the humans plots. I’m always up for a good story about evil corporate but it’s hard to go from the video game world with its fun physics back to a normal workplace subplot. It just doesn’t really do many new or different things here. You have Millie as one of the main characters and her goal to find the piece of code is a good one. You may have some questions on how exactly she intends to find this on her own though. Without Guy it seems like this would have been truly impossible without some kind of extra hacking ability.

She gets points for being more proactive than Keys though. Keys literally joins with the villains and gives up on his dreams. He let the villains steal them all away and that’s not what you want to see from the main character. You want Keys to get out there and fight with the best of them. Instead he even discourages Millie from fighting back. Even in the romance plot he’s very laid back as he leaves a lot of clues for Millie but when she doesn’t notice them he basically gave up. If not for other characters acting on his behalf, he would not have ever made any progress.

Antwan’s a fun villain though. He’s your classic evil CEO who dials himself up to 11 with how crazy he gets. Perhaps this isn’t very original but he was entertaining enough so I’d give him a pass. The guy just wants to become mega rich and do whatever he wants. It’s a classic villain motivation but one that doesn’t want to get old since so many people want to be rich. He probably could have handled the situation a whole lot better though. Shutting down the first game sooner would have helped him a whole lot.

One of the worst humans in the film had to be Mouser though. He’s Keys’ friend but not a very loyal one. Mouser is always quick to follow orders and does whatever he can to stay in the company’s good graces. Sure, he steps up at the very end of the film but it’s way too late by then. The guy read none of the writing on the wall and didn’t even try to approach Keys and ask him about what was going on. That would have really been a good idea here since they were friends and all. Mouser was just disappointing here.

Guy’s friend Buddy isn’t much better though. At the end of the day he wasn’t brave enough to follow Guy’s example. It shows the difference between being a main character and being a sidekick. In the end Buddy was just not ready to enter the main stage. Also, he just doesn’t tend to be as funny as the other characters. He has his moments to be sure but sometimes his jokes just tend to drag on instead and that’s never a good thing for this kind of character.

As a comedy film, Free Guy will naturally be throwing an onslaught of jokes at you. I would say it’s nearly impossible for any comedy film to land with all of their jokes, the idea is that if you land on most of them then you should be good. Well, I would say Free Guy does land more often than not which is the sign of being a good film. For every iffy joke like the goldfish, the top pro player, or Buddy being too obsessive, you’ll have a solid array of good jokes to balance it out.

The only real weakness for the film naturally goes back to the human side as I mentioned. The romance is rather weak in this film. Both with the Guy plot and then with Keys. None of those romance plots really do anything but slow down the movie’s pacing. I’d also say the movie just isn’t good at getting really serious. When you have the cameos from real life pro players and such, it might make you cringe just a tad. They’re just a little too over the top which does match their persona in most streams but it’s hard to take seriously. Especially since the rest of the film is more comical. Free Guy has its serious moments of course but usually it’s still chuckling a bit in the background while these scenes are 100% serious.

Overall, Free Guy is a solid movie and definitely one that I would consider as a feel good film. It’s rather upbeat the whole time with a quick tempo so the movie never gets boring. I do think it’s best when the film is just having fun and exploring the video game world. When it gets serious and focuses on the human characters it doesn’t have the same amount of pop. I would definitely be game for a sequel though, there’s a whole lot you can do with this. Just keep up the solid references and cameos and you will have a great formula for a sequel. If you haven’t seen this film yet then I would definitely recommend changing that.

Overall 6/10

Monster Hunter Review

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Monster Hunter is a franchise that always seemed pretty fun. I haven’t played any of the games yet but I did watch one of the anime and it was solid. The monster designs are on point and so a movie for this could have a lot of potential. In some ways the movie is really stellar like with the effects and soundtrack, but unfortunately that doesn’t translate to the actual movie which suffers greatly from a lack of quality characters and no real good dynamics. The sequel would likely take things to the next level but we’ll see if that ever manages to come out.

The movie starts with Artemis and her team looking for some missing soldiers. They find an abandoned truck with signs of a struggle around it but no bodies. Then a giant storm appears and throws the gang through a portal into a different world. This world is dangerous with lots of giant monsters and crazy creatures running around. There is seemingly no escape from them and one by one they pick off all of Artemis’ team. She is now alone and must try to find her way back to Earth. She will have to reluctantly team up with a mysterious hunter who isn’t the nicest guy around. Can they put aside their differences and stay alive?

So lets quickly talk about what went right for this film and why I thought it had potential rather deep into the film until I realized it wasn’t going to happen. First off, the soundtrack really is excellent. It’s one of the best that I’ve heard in a long time with a good amount of electronic tunes. This sounds like something straight out of the Tron film series. It also has some solid action tunes and as a result this is a soundtrack that you could throw right into a video game without any issues. That’s how solid it is.

Then you have the special effects which are on point. We meet several monsters but of course the Diablos is the main one from all of the trailers. They all look good and rather faithful to the games where they came from. It’s clear that there was a good amount of effort put into the research part of the movie. I would have liked to have seen some more monsters of course but the ones that we did get were solid. Then you have the flame sword and some more intense weapons at the end of the film. The cliffhanger makes you feel like the next film would have really gotten involved with the lore of the series and even thrown in some villains. It could have been a Final Fantasy type experience.

Also, the first chunk of the film about Artemis and her team running around the island is like something out of Alien only much better. The gang are all experienced soldiers in an unfamiliar territory fighting off monsters that are basically Xenomorphs. One by one they are picked off but the scene shave a lot of tension and suspense. You could even call the film part horror for this whole part until the final members die and Hunter appears. This was the best part of the film. Now I still have some issues like with the neck bursters taking the place of the chest bursters. Do we need any kind of bursters in every alien film? I’d rather get torn apart by a Xenomorph than have that happen to be honest.

The film can’t really resist having this happen to one member at least but the film mostly has restraint otherwise. The scenes can be intense but it’s more about the atmosphere than what is actually happening on screen and I do think that is the right approach here. Finally, the last positive I can give for the movie is that Artemis is a very solid main character. She’s a no nonsense fighter who knows how to keep her team focused and not get sidetracked by every little thing. It’s easy to see how she earned the captain role and never falters throughout the movie.

In general the film’s pacing is solid as well so things never drag on. Still, the second half is a big downgrades and a big part of that is Hunter’s fault. So, Hunter can only talk in the language of the new world so he and Artemis don’t understand each other. I think that already puts the film in a tough position since it’s very hard to write good banter in such a situation. I absolutely think it’s possible with top tier writers but do you think Monster Hunter has that level of talent at the ready? Most of the conversations are basically just the two characters making fun of each other. It takes them a while to actually get along and by that point the film is nearly over.

They even have a very serious fight early on where they nearly murder each other. It was certainly quite the way to get introduced to each other. Hunter’s mostly the one at fault here though as he kept on taunting Artemis. She had to put him in his place to establish the chain of command around here. Hunter just never gets all that interesting though and I would have almost preferred Artemis was on her own the whole time.

There’s also one scene that will take you out of the immersion for a bit because of how ludicrous it is. So, after hours of being in the desert and fighting monsters, Artemis reaches in her pocket and takes out a Hershey’s Chocolate Bar. It is perfectly solid and not melted at all. She uses it as a peace offering with Hunter who loves it since this is the best brand of chocolate of all time. Here’s the problem, while I don’t mind shameless product placement since I always find that entertaining, there’s no way it wouldn’t have melted. Try carrying a chocolate bar in your pocket while you’re walking around and handling day to day tasks. I’ve done this a few times in my day and let me tell you, your pocket’s going to be a mess after this.

There is no way that would even resemble a bar by the time she was done with the first act of the film. It may be a minor thing but I couldn’t stop thinking about that because of how obvious it was. As usual for these kinds of films the heroes are rather desperate for whatever they can eat which usually ends up looking rather gross. The characters have to skin the monsters to get weapons and bait which can also be rather messy and gross. That part of Monster Hunter I would be cool with skipping so we can just get to the action already.

That’s not even counting the rest of Hunter’s crew who was completely forgettable. It’s easy to forget they even had an intro scene in the film. I think what this boils down to is that the film was a lot more interesting when it was Artemis and her team. I would have changed it so the whole film was about them trying to survive rather than switching to Hunter and his crew. That would have just ended up being a lot more fun in the end.

One thing you want to have for a sci-fi film like this..or any film really is some fun banter and dialogue while blasting your way through the enemy planet. This film doesn’t have any of that since nobody who can speak English even appear until we’re near the end of the film. You also won’t get answers to the interesting parts of the film yet like who put up the towers to cause the portals between worlds.

At the very end of the film we see a glimpse of the likely culprit but there’s no clue on who this is. There’s so much you can do with this, particularly since there seems to be a castle of some kind at the end. A villain group all fighting with magical swords/weapons would make for an amazing sequel. Sure, the monsters may get less screen time but I would be fine with that. It was fun seeing the government step in again near the end but even then this was a very brief moment.

Overall, Monster Hunter could have been a lot better. It just made a lot of questionable choices in the second half. Hunter could have been much more interesting than how he ended up being. I could do with less of the crude humor like the cat getting his fur in the drink that they end up having to drink. Those scenes don’t need to be there and the writing just doesn’t feel nearly as good as it could have been. Artemis can’t hold the entire film on her own and it’s an issue that the film is trying to give her the full load. At least the excellent soundtrack ensures that you will have a good audio experience, but the solid first act is not enough to keep this movie afloat so it’s time to give this one a skip.

Overall 4/10

Redemption Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Redemption is one of those films that could have worked really well as a stylistic action blockbuster where things are happening around every corner. Instead the film goes for grit and more often than not this ends up hurting the film. By the end everyone’s in rather poor shape and the film does not go for a happy ending. You just know that they’re all doomed.

The movie starts by introducing us to Joe. He’s currently homeless and just trying to survive in the back alleys. Unfortunately there are a group of thugs who go around beating up the homeless every night. Joe ends up escaping but not before getting roughed up quite a bit. He ends up falling into an empty apartment and takes refuge there. The owner won’t be back for a while so this may be his chance to finally start over. Joe stops taking drugs and even gets a job in a restaurant washing dishes. Things are looking up but then he starts getting into some dangerous territory when he accepts a job as an enforcer. On one hand the pay is excellent, but on the other hand he’s basically become a thug now. Can he find true romance like this?

A big part of the film is that he likes a lady named Cristina who works as a nun and as a result can’t actually date him. Joe doesn’t seem to care about that and pressures her into an affair all the time. She half heartedly tries rejecting him a few times but the issue is that she does enjoy the presents. At one point he gives her a ton of cash which she uses to buy some opera tickets. As the film goes on she definitely starts to lower her defenses but Joe tends to make things harder on himself by getting mixed into more dangerous situations so he isn’t always ready at the right time.

The romance is just pretty bad here. If Christina is interested then she should have just retired right away. The life of a nun isn’t for everyone and if that is the case for her then there’s no shame in walking away from that. It would have definitely been a much better option than trying to have it both ways. That’s what gets her into trouble quite a bit. She is a nice person who does a lot for the community so I won’t knock Christina entirely, but this plot just really dragged on throughout.

Never one to miss up a chance for adding some dark elements to the story, we also find out that Christina has a very dark backstory. It’s got to point being in the film except to add some shock value. Likewise we eventually learn about how Joe got into his present situation and lets just say it was not a pleasant experience. The film goes into it but effectively he was a soldier who ended up going on a bit of a revenge mission that rewarded him with a lot of guilt for the rest of his life. While it does explain how he became so broken in the film, it doesn’t make the rest of it any more enjoyable.

We’ve got a lead character here who is an excellent fighter, is intelligent, and resourceful. When Joe puts his mind to it he is able to quickly get a job and turn his life around. He gets off the drugs and even gets in shape again. It was a really solid turnaround but then the ending just throws that on its head for no real reason. There’s no good explanation for why he would just throw his life back out of whack like that. He can try to atone for his previous crimes or ignore it and push on. Intentionally putting himself back in a position where he’s going to be getting beat up and hunted again just isn’t a good way to end things.

There is a mild subplot where people are hunting him down with some security drones. By the end of the film we know who these guys are and this had potential but the film really doesn’t go into it very much. This ends up being more of an after thought that occurs so randomly you may forget it is even happening at some points. If this plot was played up more as Joe is on the run from this group then that would be interesting. I could have definitely gotten behind that.

Instead the film is mainly about showing us just how corrupt the place is. Joe never ends up being a likable character because he does a really bad job of coping with what’s going on. For example, becoming a shady enforcer was a bad move right from the jump. The instant he took that position he lost a lot of credit with me. There were so many other things he could have done instead. Had Joe kept on focusing on feeding the homeless and bettering himself then I think the movie would have been better off for it.

Maybe throw in some more fight scenes to show that he still has skills. We get a few fights but not really the stylized ones you would expect. They’re street fights through and through but at least they give us a break from how depressing the rest of the film can be. Even the main villain of the film naturally can’t be some random evil gangster but instead he’s really depraved. The film gives a whole lot of detail on how he takes down his victims and it’s just more grit.

Overall, Redemption is a film you will definitely want to avoid. If the film is supposed to be about Joe trying to redeem himself then it definitely failed at that approach. Joe starts off on a decent path for that and then just falls off the cliff. There are a whole lot of ways he could have helped people out with his skillset. A film about him taking the city back over from the gangs or something like that could have potentially been inspiring. Whether you’re looking for a dramatic film or a romance thriller, you’ll want to stay far away from this one.

Overall 2/10

Tokyo Mew Mew Au Lait

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I’m now caught up with the Au Lait spinoff. That said, it doesn’t come anywhere close to capturing the fun of the original Mew Mew series. None of the guys have any self respect or control and the heroine just lets all heroes and villains have their way with her. The manga’s been on a steep decline for a while now but maybe it’ll recover in time for the ending. I’ll have the review up for this series once it finishes.

Overall 1/10

Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster Review

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It’s a really good thing they didn’t call this Frankenstein vs the Space Monster because the fight doesn’t happen until the final 2 minutes of the film. So if you’re looking at the poster and getting hyped…don’t be. At least not for the fight. Also, Frankenstein doesn’t even appear in this film so…heh this film is taking a lot of liberties right off the gate. Now, I would say this is still a good film but it definitely could have been so much better. The writing and characters are fun so throw in a bit more action, better villain motivations and you’d really have a hit here.

The movie starts with a group of aliens from Mars deciding to head to Earth and kidnap all of the women so they can repopulate. Right off the gate I can say this isn’t a great plot. When that is the villain’s entire goal then there is no way to really like the villains or find them very interesting. That is a considerable issue because you need good villains in order to get the film to the next level. There are really three villains of note here. You’ve got the Princess Marcuzan who really just sits on her throne the whole time. She can’t fight and doesn’t do a lot of leading either so I wouldn’t expect a whole lot from her.

Then there’s her right hand man Nadir who does a lot of the actual planning. For some reason he will always stare right at the camera and grin after delivering his lines. I have a feeling that wasn’t exactly what he was supposed to be doing. Then you have the monster himself but he doesn’t do anything until the final 4-5 minutes of the film and is just caged up instead. Not a great way to make me impressed with the villain right out of the gate.

As for the human plot, well the government is getting ready to send a spaceship from Earth. To make sure there are no human risks this time, they are sending up an android named Frank. Unfortunately, he isn’t quite perfected yet as he will randomly go into a kind of stasis where he is frozen. It did make for an entertaining scene where he freezes and the camera just stays still for a while. Now you may think this could pose a problem when he is in space with no back-up but the scientists don’t see it that way. They send him up but he gets blasted down by the aliens. Now he is injured with some memory loss and has turned into a monster who will destroy anyone in his way.

Like the actual Frankenstein monster it’s hard to find this guy all that heroic or likable because he does go around murdering people in the meantime. Now at this point he can only read emotions so he just kind of goes berserk but you’d hope that he could fight the system programming a little better. The film continues to show you why sending this guy into space would be an absolutely awful decision all around. There are two human characters of importance in Adam and Karen but they are pretty much non factors here. Adam sees Frank as a pure robot with no feelings or emotions so he doesn’t feel bad when he sees how beat up the guy is. I suppose to an extent this is probably true since I don’t see this android being sophisticated enough to have a soul but at the same time it still makes him come across as rather heartless.

Then you have Karen who feels bad for Frank the whole time but doesn’t really do much to help him. She may act concerned but if you’re not going to do anything about it then it doesn’t make much of a difference. So both of these humans are rather forgettable and you’re just here for the sci-fi action anyway. I will say the writing is solid and the pacing is on point which you would expect for a retro film like this. It’s the kind of movie that just flows into each scene really smoothly.

The soundtrack is surprisingly fast paced and upbeat. It’s got some classic beach tunes and never really lets up. The fact that the film has a real soundtrack automatically means it beats most of its competitors for this kind of title. The tracks aren’t great or anything but they are memorable and give the movie a little more personality. The film may have had a bit of a hard time deciding what kind of film it wanted to be but if you take it as a really cheesy sci-fi flick then you’ll be fine.

I would have just liked to have seen a bit more action. That would have really helped the film since the whole point of a creature feature is to have some real fight scenes. What’s the point of coming up with a monster design and everything if he isn’t going to do anything until the film is ending? That just doesn’t make a whole lot of sense if you ask me. I would also get rid of the repopulation plot entirely and just switch the villain’s goals to a classic take over the world kind of plan. It may have been done before but it’s still a better plan than what the film came up with.

That’s the biggest weakness of the film. It sometimes tries too hard to be a beach type film where you have characters modeling for no real reason or having to be shown off like exhibits by the aliens. The film has more fanservice than you would expect and the scenes all feel like complete filler. All of the beach scenes should have been cut out along with this sub plot and the film would have been all the better for it. It still comes off as a storyline that’s really random. Maybe the writers couldn’t figure out how to stretch the plot of aliens attacking without this but if that’s the case, that’s not a good look. There’s so much you can do with alien invasions. For starters I would have liked seeing more of the government’s overall response to this.

Overall, Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster is the kind of film that you feel you have seen many times before. It isn’t trying anything new but at the same time the execution is good enough where you won’t be bored. As the movie goes through the motions you will be engaged. It’s always fun to see how the alien films were made back in the day. There aren’t a lot of explosions or action, it’s really a very down to Earth title..aside from the aliens of course. There is still a body count but even that feels low key. The aliens just go around blasting everyone with their fancy ray guns and the humans don’t take it all that personally. Some of them barely react. It’s the kind of movie that certainly wouldn’t come out nowadays so this is really a relic of an older time. If you like science fiction then I expect you’ll definitely like this one. One advantage to being such a simple film is that you can jump right in at any point and understand what is going on.

Overall 6/10

Winn Adami vs The Master

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Suggested by iKnowledge Winn is good at manipulating people but that’s about all that she has up her sleeve. It definitely won’t be enough to deter someone like the Master who still has a little electrical abilities up his sleeve. It’s not much but it’s enough to quickly take her out of the picture. Winn doesn’t really have any true defenses against such a technique. The Master wins.

Darkseid vs Broly

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Suggested by JordyPresto0418 Darkseid is strong but he’s not exactly in the same weight class as someone like Broly. Broly is even stronger and faster than Darkseid which puts him in a really bad spot. The omega lasers won’t be disintegrating Broly as the guy’s durability is just too high. At that point, there’s nothing to do but take a heavy loss this time. Broly wins.

Ten Tails vs Isshiki Ōtsutsuki

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Suggested by Anonymous The Ten Tails is a powerful monster but it’s fair to say that he doesn’t have the speed or power needed to take down Isshiki. Isshiki can absorb jutsu and even manage to take on Naruto and Sasuke. Nothing that Ten Tails has at his disposal will be enough to even give him a fighting chance. This beast just can’t rely on power to get the job done here. Isshiki Otsutsuki wins.

Japanman vs Duo

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Suggested by Destroyer Japanmqan is a fast navi with some good sword skills but compared to most other speed types in the verse I wouldn’t say he ever did anything super impressive. I see him going down rather quickly against someone like Duo. Duo isn’t very fast but his attack range is big enough where he should still be able to land some blows which will deal absolutely devastating damage to Japanman. That will be game over for him. Duo wins.