Tag Archives: Horror

Stepfather III Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

You can tell that the writers stopped caring with this one but I can at least give the poster some props. It’s one of those images where it’s hard to see exactly what’s going on at first. Is it a knife, shovel, or a candle? If the guy bleeding, just blasted someone else who’s bleeding, or is it the rain? Is he looking sad, mad, or glad? The more you look at the poster, the more it changes. I know what you’re thinking though, it’s bad when you have to start complementing the poster!

Okay so Jerry survived yet again because he’s just that powerful. He runs over to a plastic surgeon who agrees to give him a new look and doesn’t question how dangerous this situation is. Jerry murders the guy afterwards and heads to a new town. There he meets the desperate widow Christine and quickly marries her. This time he is sure that he’s found the perfect family but he will have to deal with her ex-boyfriend Mark, her ex-husband Steve, and his mistress Jennifer. Can Jerry defeat all of these obstacles? Man that’s a lot of people here.

Okay so the first big issue with this film is that it seems like Jerry’s character doesn’t make a lot of sense here. Yes the guy is insane and all but at least he did have his vision of a perfect family. Every little thing that goes against his values would set him off and his view of a perfect family was a bit warped but he wouldn’t sabotage it himself. Now we have a subplot where he is cheating on his wife with the new neighbor. Really? That doesn’t make any sense. Yes he would look for his next targets as he’s ending the current arrangement but he never actually makes a move until that’s happened.

Also…having an affair in the same small town where everybody knows everybody? No disguise or anything, he just drives on over there. Of course he’s caught but the whole thing is so obvious that it doesn’t work. Jerry was a master strategist who evaded the cops for years and had plans for his plans. You can’t expect me to believe that he would suddenly be making rookie mistakes like this. Of course he ends up blaming Jennifer for tempting him and tries to turn it all around but it doesn’t change the fact that he made the errors here. He’s the one ruining the perfect family concept and it goes against his character. That’s really his only gimmick as the villain so if you toss that aside then there’s not much left.

Meanwhile it is almost funny to see an ex boyfriend and ex husband in the same movie. I feel like that’s really rare at this point. The ex husband is lucky that he doesn’t stick around since I thought he was doomed. Of course Jerry makes quick work out of the ex boyfriend but that almost felt like a bit of satire with how the guy just shows up to get bumped off. It’s not played out that way but what are the odds right?

This guy wasn’t that smart or good with his reaction times either. Don’t just stand there and get pounded like a sack of toast. Meanwhile I wasn’t a big fan of Christine either. Naturally she is tricked rather quickly and the whole wedding was rather quick. She ignored everyone’s advice that she was going too fast and just kept moving along. Now everyone may have seemed like they were just being sour grapes but the warning bells were there. Like Jerry laying hands on one of her sons when he was playing video games. The way she found out may have been rather dramatic but she overlooks it so quickly.

Then we have the affair going on and she lets herself be manipulated a little too easily. Her plans are always thrown away and she is never able to stay one step ahead of the game. In this film Jerry left a lot of clues that something was not right and she didn’t pick up on them. Then you have Father Ernest who was at least helping the kid try to crack the case here but unfortunately that didn’t work out. Ultimately Jerry did sniff that plan out quick and unfortunately the roads were deserted. Unfortunately there wasn’t anything Ernest could have done there so the whole thing is just tragic for him. He didn’t even make any mistakes necessarily, he just didn’t drive quick enough.

As for Jennifer, well she was moving rather fast but at least she didn’t know that Jerry was married. Again it does continue the trend of everyone being so desperate in these films. It’s like nobody is content to just be alone and happy, you always gotta be looking for the next rebound. The romances here are all rather weak but that was probably obvious from the jump. This isn’t really the film you’re looking for when trying to find a quality romance.

Now while the film is definitely not good and the writing for Jerry didn’t work at all, there is one positive I can say about the film. The soundtrack is actually surprisingly good. I dare say I would even call it great. There are a lot of tunes that sound like they’re from the 90’s X-Men show. The music is definitely more comic book movie material than your average horror fare. I was surprised whenever a good tune would show up and it happened several times. Perhaps even though the budget was lower they were able to spend more on music or they chose these to save money and they just ended up being really good. However they pulled that off, it definitely worked for me.

It doesn’t save the film of course though as it still suffers from all the usual horror pitfalls. Aside from the writing being sub par you’ve also got to deal with the over the top violence that is always around. Everyone gets bumped off in rather brutal ways. The surgery scene at the beginning is also very graphic and so the movie is trying to put in as much grit as possible. It should have stuck to the Matrix effects like in the first murder where it’s like the guy was phasing out of existence with a lot of clones and tremor effects. Instead we just go back to normal murders after that and that never helps a film out.

Overall, Stepfather III is a film you should certainly skip. In a way I’d probably say that this beats the first two and ends up as the best in the trilogy but that would be due entirely to the soundtrack. After all it’s similar to the first two but they didn’t have good music. Jerry betrays his entire character here but in a way it shows that he was always a villain with no morals so that may not be a bad thing. He’s so bad at covering his tracks that it buys time for the main characters as well. It’s a bit ironic that the final movie would end up being the best one as usually it tends to fall off but it’s not like it matters much since the gap between them is fairly small anyway.

Overall 2/10

Stepfather II Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for the Stepfather to return for another adventure. How did he survive his wounds from the first film? Well, I guess you could say that he’s just built different. Nothing’s putting him down, at least not right now. Unfortunately this movie is more of the same and so there’s not much good to say about it. It’s your classic slasher film with everyone making some questionable decisions.

The movie starts off with showing us that Jerry is now at an asylum. At least he’s not being allowed to run rampant around the world but it’s a very small consolation at this point because the therapist in charge of him isn’t really the cautious type. He is quickly convinced to let Jerry have his way around the place and gets promptly bumped off. Jerry has to look for a new widow and that isn’t hard either. Carol is very eager to get together with him and the two hit it off. Will she be able to realize what a phony he is in time or will it all be game over for her?

Right off the bat it feels like the film is winking at us a bit. This therapist was just way too trusting. Seriously he got fooled this easily? All it took was Jerry playing on the guy’s ego a bit and he was twisting him around with ease. The guy should have seen this coming and even telling the guard to leave the room was a bit much. You knew the guy was doomed either way but he made it all so easy on Jerry.

Meanwhile I wouldn’t say that Carol looks very good here either. Her friends are right that Carol barely even knows this guy. Sure, most of them are happy either way but this is why you shouldn’t go on the rebound so quickly. Every guy is going to try and appear normal at first, that part’s obvious. It’s why you gotta take it real slow. Now I’m not saying that you have to take a few years but at least enough time to hopefully really get to know him. The rebound shouldn’t be considered automatic though, like Carol doesn’t absolutely have to find a new man. Maybe she’s happy on her own and that’s completely okay.

It’s why I still find Jerry’s whole gimmick to be annoying because it resides on the assumption that he will find someone who wants to marry him at every town. That feels like it should be a stretch and yet it ends up working out for him every time. It shouldn’t be so easy. Jerry himself is just as insane as always. He does lay on the nice guy act rather thick but I guess everyone just eats it up. It’s too bad he’s saying every line ironically since the whole family message could be rather decent if it was coming from someone else. It just loses all of its weight when he’s saying it.

Matty is Carol’s best friend and you feel bad for her since Carol immediately turns on the lady. You’d think Carol would appreciate how hard Matty was working to try and make sure that everything was good. Instead Carol basically threatens to terminate their friendship. Matty is nice enough where she still keeps on going with the investigation but ultimately makes the mistake of going to Jerry directly about this. When you’ve already proven that someone is lying, why not go straight to the local authorities or if you don’t think they’ll take the stolen identity angle seriously, then tell Carol. Force the issue or make a big stink about it throughout the neighborhood so everybody knows. Confronting the villain one on one is not the way to go about it.

Yeah Carol made it hard on her which is why Carol’s not a great heroine either but this still wasn’t the way to go about it. Todd actually got along with Jerry well enough in this version so the act actually could have worked but ultimately Jerry made too many mistakes and it came back to bite him. Todd was able to step up when it was crunch time. Then you have Phil who shows up to get absolutely wrecked right away. Again, this didn’t make Carol look great since she seemed willing to jump ship and go back to Phil only to rebound with Jerry once again when that guy mysteriously vanished.

The worst part is that Phil didn’t seem like he was going to be a great guy either, he was just going to be better than Jerry and that’s not a tall order to fulfill. Jerry does a good job of covering his tracks but the victims really make this easy on him the whole time. There are a lot of ways to explain their disappearances each time because they ended up meeting with Jerry 1 on 1. You know that eventually things will work out but it always takes quite a while to get to that point.

The film’s fairly violent as you would expect and follows the usual horror formula. Everyone gets bumped off over and over again here. Sometimes it’s almost out of nowhere like a random driver showing up and getting taken out. This time around Jerry even starts to throw in some one liners when he takes the characters down. That was definitely different as I don’t really remember him doing this much in the first film. Maybe he did and I forgot but I don’t think that was the case. This would then continue into the next movie.

Overall, Stepfather II has no real good excuse to get Jerry back onto the field so the whole opening scenes are as contrived as possible. In general the film only barely works because it’s all such a big stretch. Then it stumbles for the rest of the duration anyway with Jerry not being a very interesting villain. Yeah we know he’s crazy but at least in the first film he’s trying to have some kind of plan which is to have a perfect family while here he’s letting everything get in the way of that. It’s almost like he’s sabotaging everything on his own. Just don’t give out so much information that could be easily traced to show that he’s lying. He’s almost better off just claiming amnesia with some of the lies he’s telling here. He should also quit naming such small towns where everybody has heard of everyone. Start saying New York City or something since nobody would be able to verify that so easily back in the day.

Overall 2/10

Graveyard Shift Review

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This is a review of the unedited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

So whenever you’ve got humans fighting against monsters movies seem to try and make the humans are unlikable as possible. Perhaps it’s so that you won’t feel so bad when the humans die but I find that it can also be a double edged sword in that the film itself can be made worse because there’s nobody to root for and you end up rooting for the monsters. Well, that’s pretty much what happens here. There’s one or two decent people here but for the most part you can see why the rats are staging a rebellion.

The movie starts off with one guy murdering a bunch of rats just because he can. It’s clear that this guy is the real villain of the film so the rats gang up on him and their leader throws that guy in the shredder. They now realize that they can fight for what’s right and seem to unionize. Well, the mill needs a new person to load up the cotton and that’s where John comes in. He’s desperate for a job and this is really the only game in town so he’s forced to jump into the mix even though his boss Warwick is suspect at best. The guy threatens his colleagues into having affairs with him and doesn’t have any morals.

When people die he just shrugs and moves on. The guy has no ethics at all but unfortunately he’s the boss. John will have to try and survive out here but it won’t be easy. The only food place for miles is not hygienic and he falls for the girl that has caught Warwick’s eye, Jane. Not it’s extra personal and the rest of the staff were already bullying John so it’s only going to get worse from here on out.

I guess the mean people just flock to this town. You’ve got bullies, a corrupt boss, and just about everyone is only looking for their own self interests. There is nobody to confide in or to trust. It’s a rather lonely experience for John which may be why he was desperate for romance but the whole romance plot doesn’t work. It’s another rebound scenario and John only just got here. The whole thing is fairly rushed. The only acceptable explanation is that he’s just desperate for any friend but even then that’s not good enough for me to give this a passing grade.

The film has a lot of issues but lets knock out the biggest one right out of the jump. There’s a lot of animal violence here as the characters are bumping off the rats. It was rather sadistic how the first guy would toss them into the shredder. From there on you can see why they’d need revenge but of course in the meantime the humans are fighting back. They throw bottles at them and lay all kinds of traps. That’s why a film where a big amount of emphasis is put on the animal is always going to end up failing. It’s unlikely to avoid animal violence in such a scenario and that’s what happened here.

While the score wouldn’t be as abysmal without the rats, I can’t say that the film would be good either way though. It’s just a very mean spirited title all the way through. John doesn’t really fall for all of their instigative actions as he just minds his business but the bullying is quite excessive. As I already mentioned, Warwick is just a bad guy all the way through. He’s not as omnipresent as most villains so the heroes can at least escape him for a while here and there but then they tend to trip and it’s game over as the rat pack shows up.

The only props I’ll give the film is that the creature was decent. They keep him in the shadows for nearly the entire film but at least he makes for a solid threat. Rats are intense in great numbers and all but it’s always nice to actually have a big villain to really unite against. It gives them all a common foe as opposed to just beating up on a bunch of minions. Also the latter would be even worse for the movie since that would mean a lot of rats would be injured.

I wouldn’t even know where to begin in trying to save this film. It just didn’t have potential right from the jump. It could have used some more action and maybe a subplot about John trying to make the town a little better. That could have been interesting and at least give the audience a little more reason to care about their ultimate survival. Otherwise for the most part you’re just waiting for them to get taken out. The characters are just so mean. Also what’s with the one guy and yelling whenever he launches his water cannon? He’s very overdramatic the whole time when he’s just shooting water.

One guy had the right idea in just walking out over the poor working conditions. Ultimately that’s a much safer option than just sticking around. Of course whether you make it out or not is always a different story since it can go either way but the rule of thumb is to never stay in a bad situation. It’s just very rarely going to work out and more times than not you’ll regret staying.

Overall, The Graveyard Shift would have been much better if it had been about ghosts or something like that. Make it a spooky kind of horror film instead of focusing on rats the whole time. The rats really didn’t help the movie’s case and it was really sub par at best. You’re definitely going to want to avoid this one. You can do better with almost any of the other creature feature films. They end up doing a lot more in terms of scares and likable characters than this one which fumbled the ball the whole time.

Overall 1/10

Copycat Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Copycat is one of those films where you know it’s not going to be so good right from the jump. The question is will it rise to mid status or will it just be bad? Well, in this case it never ended up recovering and this is probably a film you aren’t going to be checking out a second time anyway. It’ll just fade away into obscurity.

The movie starts with Helen giving a lecture on the various mass murderers of the day and how you have to be scared because right now even some of the classmates could be evil. Her doom and gloom speech is a big hit but unfortunately one of those murderers was in attendance and attacks her. The guy murders one of the cops but is ultimately captured. Unfortunately the experience scarred Helen for life and she can no longer leave her apartment now. She is completely trapped.

This gets a little intense for her when she reads the news and sees that another mass murderer has appeared. This is her specialty but it’s not like she can go out there to take names and find out what’s going on. Helen is given little choice in the matter though when the villain sends her a threatening message. Monahan and Reuben are the two cops who will be helping her out here but can any of them take down this new villain? One thing’s for sure, they need to keep their guards up at all times.

I’ve noticed that these mass murder mystery films tend to put the main character in a rather difficult spot so they can’t help too much. At least it happened twice which is enough to make me raise an eyebrow as bone collector did the same thing. Since Helen can’t leave and is racked with fear that limits what she can actually contribute to the case. Considering all of this she actually does rather well in looking at the clues and helping out. You feel bad for her too because you figure one traumatic experience is enough for a life time and yet she’s going to have to go for a second one now.

I thought she was a good character though. Helen is tough and talks back to the other characters while also keeping up her boundaries. She only allows her friend Andy to see any moment of weakness within her. To everyone else she at least tries to keep the image up the whole time. Her friend Andy means well and looks after her but you get the feeling that he is doomed from the jump.

In these films just about everyone is doomed for being too close to the lead. Usually as soon as a character appears you know they could be next on the chopping block. The villain here doesn’t have any special powers or anything like that but at the end of the day he does have the element of surprise and that’s hard to fight off. Certainly it’s difficult to combat that on short notice at least.

The villain here is one of those psychotic kind of characters as you can probably guess. It’s also hard to call this a murder mystery to the extent that the film isn’t really giving you a chance to find out who the murderer is for the most part. I suppose the mystery is more about finding him before he bumps someone else off. Unfortunately the tricky part is that it takes a while to find a pattern or any leads so the body count here is already rather high.

I liked the two cops on the case though. Monahan does her best to manipulate everyone and shows that she has what it takes as a cop. Her approach to everything is rather by the book which isn’t a bad thing but the film uses that against her at one point. She ultimately gets off a shot just like how the manual said to do but in the end it wasn’t enough. I blame everyone else at the scene far more than her though because she still did her part.

At one point I almost started to wonder if she was going to end up being a villain in a twist or something but I’m glad the movie didn’t go in that direction. As for Reuben, he’s a good partner. Helen even tries to give him some romance tips at one point although I think it’s a little dicey to be thinking about how to make a move while there’s a serious threat on the loose like this. Ultimately Reuben may be a quick shot but that doesn’t mean he’s super safe.

The villain from the opening scene: Daryll, sticks around for the film and that was unfortunate. We already have one psychopath in this film, did we really need 2? Any scene with this guy in it is super annoying and drags on. I don’t think they should have even given that creep much attention. I suppose they were desperate for leads but that’s when you get someone on the inside to rough him up a bit. That may be easier said than done of course but it’s just a shame that Helen had to work with this guy even for a minute after what happened.

The movie’s stinger for the sequel is also really weak. It doesn’t make you hyped for a possible sequel at all and is just a groaner. It could have done something, almost anything more interesting than that. I would have no reason to believe the sequel would be any better than this film. In fact, there is even the chance that it would just be worse in the end depending on who the main villain is.

Overall, There isn’t much to like about Copycat. It’s your run of the mill horror/slasher title. It’s really gritty and by the time the heroes come around it’s always too late. The victories here feel hollow as a result and nobody is ever prepared so they get bumped like it’s nothing. The writing isn’t anything special and this film is really one of those dime a dozen horror titles. I would recommend just steering clear of this one. It doesn’t even have anything super entertaining to talk about or that at least would make it stand out. I suppose I won’t forget the scene with the random criminal at the police station because of how random it was. Whatever could go wrong for the heroes certainly did each time.

Overall 2/10

The Stepfather Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

This film plays out just like you would expect it to. It’s a dime a dozen horror/slasher kind of film where everyone is too oblivious for their own good. There was one scene which was an interesting subversion but on the other hand the whole scene felt really annoying and stretched my disbelief to the max so I’m not sure it was a great tradeoff. This film doesn’t do much right tbh, I suppose at least it reminds you on the dangers of rebounding. It can always get a little dangerous.

So the movie starts off with Jerry murdering a family and then running off to his next disguise. Basically his gimmick is that he will take on a new identity and marry a widow who has a kid. They’ll then live a normal life until he gets bored or upset and then he takes them out before repeating the process. What you have to understand is that for him to do this so often, a lot of people are just marrying him real quick. We don’t know how many times he’s pulled this off but it’s heavily implied that the scene we saw in the beginning of the film wasn’t the first time.

With the current family he is able to quickly get on Susan’s good side but her daughter Stephanie is a harder sell. She doesn’t like Jerry and isn’t happy about having to get used to him. Jerry needs to win her over quickly because he wants a perfect family and so if that doesn’t happen then she will have to go. Stephanie didn’t like Jerry from the start so unfortunately nobody takes her too seriously when she starts to say that he might be shady. After all that may just be sour bananas right?

It’s just a little hard to buy into the fact that all these widows are so desperate that they’d marry Jerry right away. During the film there’s a quick scene where he’s already starting to get his next life all set up and immediately after a few seconds of flirting it semes like he’s got his next victim all picked out. Cmon now, the film’s going to have to work a little harder to make that seem even slightly realistic. It’s an interesting gimmick for the main villain to have but it’s not too practical.

Now the whole film there is a guy named Jim who is on the case. This paragraph and the next 4 will have big spoilers so skip them if you haven’t seen the movie yet. I just have to dive in here because this character was just so bad. Whew……this guy was really bad. SO here’s what happens, he’s the brother of the last girl that Jerry took down for the count. He has follows the guy across the state and has narrowed his search down to a few people left. Finally he gets a definitive lead and knows exactly who he is looking for. So Jim goes to the house and yes he brought his gun with him. Jim sees that the door is open and everything is awful quiet. Okay that means Jim is ready right? He takes out his gun and just starts popping off??

No, Jim walks in and starts to look around. That’s when Jerry tries to sneak up on him but the door is so old that it makes a noise so Jim sees him. “Is that you sir???” Jim basically asks and Jerry just grins. “Long time no see Jim”…..and you figure Jerry is out of ideas and options because there’s nothing he can do. Jim has the gun and there is no element of surprise. There is absolutely nothing that Jerry can even hope to do in this situation. It’s all curtains, roll credits. Except…..that’s actually not what happens here.

See….Jim…..forgot to take his gun out of his pocket. Why…..I can’t even….what’s even worse is that Jim’s pocket is closed with a zipper and it gets jammed. Noooooooo

This is one of the most contrived moments I’ve seen in cinematic history. So Jim starts fumbling with the zipper while Jerry walks over and murders him. That’s just embarrassing. That’s not only awful writing in what was already a terrible movie but it makes no sense. Clearly the idea here was to subvert your expectations since the entire film has Jim running around looking for Jerry so you’re expecting the big payoff. No instead he gets neg diffed (Defeated with negative difficulty) and wastes his gun.

You need the full context here. Jim already knew what the guy looked like, he knew his address, and he knew that the guy just quit his job in the current alias which means he is about to murder his family. Jim’s the one who connected all of these dots earlier and even warned the cops. So he knows exactly what to expect and the door was open plus the house was eerily quiet. Why didn’t he already have his gun out? Why use a pocket with a zipper so you can’t take the gun out at a moment’s notice? Man………

Okay that’s it for spoilers. So back to the film, Jim’s a pretty awful character and I don’t need to talk about him much. Jerry’s bad which is pretty much automatic as one of those random serial killers. It’s not like there is any interesting motivations to his actions or anything like that. He’s just one of those lunatics so you’re waiting for him to get his at some point. He just tends to get lucky that his opponents are either not very smart, have 0 IQ, come in with no plan, or forget their own stories. He gets a lot of breaks here.

You’ve got the therapist Dr. Bondurant who seems decent at times but then tends to fumble. I appreciate that he’s proactive and tries to meet with Jerry but then he quickly starts making easy mistakes. Being obvious about his questions, forgetting his lies even though he just needs to bluff his way through 10 minutes, etc. This guy should have done way better and the way he goes out is just awful. Look, if you’re going to die anyway then at least try fighting back, jump out the window (They’re on the ground floor), tackle, do something. Instead he’s still trying to say that he’s not lying while he’s being stabbed. At that point nobody cares, certainly not the murderer. You need to fight back instead of hoping that he’ll stop.

As one of those films where you know Jerry is evil from the jump, it does always make for an interesting perspective. You get to really backseat drive the main characters here and their decisions feel even worse this way. I like the idea though even if it doesn’t do anything to save the film here. Stephanie is okay but unfortunately she did make it tough for anyone to believe her with how she never even gave Jerry a chance. I think she should have made a bigger deal about Jerry’s random episode in the basement but realistically almost anything she did would have had her get murdered anyway so I’m not sure it would have done much. At the end of the day when you’re a kid there’s not a whole lot you can do.

The film can be quite violent so you’ll want to give this one a pass if you’re not up for that. It definitely limits the film’s potential from the jump but in this case you also had to factor in the writing. Jerry also gets the family a dog and right away there were a lot of red flags. Now, the dog does escape initially when Stephanie gets home but I don’t recall the dog appearing after that in the ending. Did it survive or not? It’s hard to tell and at least from my recollection it didn’t feel definitive. I like to imagine that he did live for that result but the film was treading on very murky water there.

Overall, The Stepfather is a movie where the plot is hard to buy right from the start. Nobody is ever helpful in trying to take him down and if anything they’re just getting in each other’s way. There are no true standout characters and the film just doesn’t have much of a soul to it. If any of the characters were even remotely tough then you expect that they would have been able to do more here. It’s also why you probably want to really take your time in a relationship before you get serious. Not sure how much it would have helped in this case but to an extent I like to think the cracks in Jerry’s façade would have started to appear. It’s not like he’s the best actor with how he forgets who he is once in a while and even uses the wrong names in random conversations. He’s not all there so it’s not like he’s some kind of genius mastermind.

Overall 2/10

Overlord Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

I had a bad feeling about this film from the start. It’s a dark and gritty zombie movie with world war II elements. None of those things sounds very appealing so when you mix it all together then you’re probably gonna be in for a rough time. Unfortunately I was right on the money with this one. It’s a film that never really lets up so you can have any fun scenes in there. Instead it just keeps on going but without any real hook to get to you.

The main character here is Boyce and he’s riding with a team that is being sent out to take out a tower so that aerial support can come in to help the troops take over one of the beaches. This is a significant battle for the allied nations so it is imperative that the tower goes down. If it does not then everyone’s doomed. The plane that Boyce is travelling in gets shot down so there are only a few survivors. They are now the last hope and must try to make it in time. This will be tougher than expected though as the Nazi have more troops here than expected. Clearly something else is going on that’s bigger than just the tower.

Right from the jump you can tell that this is the kind of film that’s going to be giving you the extra details that you don’t need. One character pukes after seeing someone get blown up and it sets the tone for the very gritty realistic vibe that the film is gunning for. Even the zombies in this film are handled in a way where it can be seen as a realistic byproduct of a serum that has been developed. I dare say if you’re going to do this plot then you should be as fantastical as possible but that’s just me.

The film is incredibly violent as you see dismembered people lying around and all sorts of shock imagery for the zombies. The heroes even go and torture one of the villains to show that they will fight as dirty as possible in order to win this. It makes the heroes seem rather unstable from the jump as well. Boyce is shown to be the only one that’s completely against stooping down to this level and he tries to get the others to calm down. Quite unsuccessfully I must say but at least the attempt was made. Nobody else really seemed to have a problem with this.

To get edgy in the other way, the film also has the main heroine getting blackmailed by a Nazi commander so they can have an affair in exchange for her safety. Evidently this has been going on for a while and while it’s finally stopped now that Boyce is here (While his teammate was quite willing to just let it all go down) it’s just another super dark plot that should have been excluded. We know that the Nazis are depraved and psychos, there is no reason to go super into depth with this and show every possible angle that this can be explored in. Ultimately it’s not like it adds to the story in any meaningful way. Everyone watching this film already knows that the Nazis are evil.

The fights are all made to be graphic and so there just isn’t any moment where you get to lighten up here. It’s just a really intensely dark film with a lot of casualties. The only really likable character here is Boyce. He keeps his humanity throughout the adventure and never crosses the line. I would say he did as much as humanly possible in trying to defy his teammates from crossing the line too. I think the rest of the characters would not have even made the attempt so that’s something that’s at least worth acknowledging there.

Now I will give the film this, it did have a good track or two during the movie. That was at least a good positive I could give to it. That’s really the only one though. The cast is not a good one and it’s hard to enjoy any scene because every second something violent or dark is going to happen. If you want to have a film about a group of troops behind enemy lines trying to do good, then you have to do something a little lighter and with more time to see the team bond and infiltrate. It needs to be done without making the heroes too unlikable either. One of them’s even a jerk to a kid the whole time for no good reason. He’s stressed out but don’t take it out on a kid.

Ford is the most unlikable out of all the heroes. He’s the one who tortures Wafner and keeps on telling Boyce that they have to ignore what’s happening in front of them and focus on the mission. He’s not the guy you want to have at your back. Following the mission is good and all but you still can’t let someone get attacked or die in front of you. The torture scene also wasn’t a good look for him. Heroes should definitely never resort to that kind of tactic. It eventually ends up with Ford and Wafner fighting to see who can dish out the most damage and make the film as gritty as possible. Their battle is probably the most violent one in the film.

Of course Wafner is an awful character. What more can be said about him, he’s a Nazi commander who abuses his power and gladly agrees with the administration. He’s a terrible person through and through. The main heroine Chloe did her best in the tough situation she was in and looked good during the movie at least. The only scene with her that was iffy was nearly getting tricked by a random soldier into entering a cell with a monster in it. Surely you would have the soldier go in first right or at least keep your gun trained on him?

Tibet is the guy who was mean to the kid for a while. By the end of the film he sees the error in his ways at least. He was the most entertaining of the group as he was always joking around and trying to have a good time but I still wouldn’t call him a great character in the end. He’s super jumpy and just doesn’t carry himself like a proper soldier. Finally you have Chase and he did well once he stopped worrying about the camera all the time. There are definitely bigger things to think about here than getting the right shots. That’s for sure.

Overall, Overlord is definitely a film that you’ll want to pass on. It’s really just nonstop grit as they fight off the enemy soldiers and occasional zombies here. The extra details are what really get you though as you have to see every action to remind us how tough the war is and how intense the villains are. Zombie films are typically a thumbs down all the way though so it’s not particularly surprising. If you really like this kind of film then by all means it’s time to jump in but otherwise you’ll want to give this one a really quick pass. It just doesn’t have anything to really salvage it and so the film feels like it’s extremely long.

Overall 1/10

The Fury Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

When you mix in government conspiracies with cool sci-fi powers then you’ve got an interesting balance of things to work with. The Fury has a lot of interesting themes without a doubt but it also felt unfocused at the same time. I was often more interested in what the main guy was doing than in the kid who was trying to get used to her powers. The ending won’t leave anyone particularly satisfying which ends up hurting the film a lot in the end.

The movie starts with Peter enjoying a nice vacation with his son Robin. Robin is gifted with psychic abilities far beyond the realm of ordinary men. Peter thinks he should accept it as a gift which will take him to greatness while Robin isn’t too thrilled to have these abilities. The point quickly becomes moot as Peter is shot and Robin is kidnapped. Ben led this uprising as he wants to have all of the psychics for himself and takes Robin to his school for the gifted. This guy has a ton of power and influence so it won’t be easy for Peter to catch him which is why we fast forward a few months into the future.

The new main character now is Gillian and she has blood manipulation powers in addition to the usual telepathic type abilities. So if she makes any kind of physical contact with someone then they’ll start to bleed. Any old wounds will open up and they can die in moments. She hopes that going to this fancy school for psychics will help her but little does she know that the place is as corrupt as it gets. Will she be able to get out of this place safely or is she already in too deep?

The plots with Peter and Gillian do end up converging of course but until that happens her plot just feels rather uneventful next to his. When Peter is around you see him taking on armed guards, stopping pickpockets, having car chase scenes, etc. He’s on a very personal mission to save Robin and the stakes are high so you just naturally get invested. Since months have passed you can also understand why he is really stressed and rushing through this because the villains can do a whole lot of damage in that time. His fears are quite warranted as well from what we see.

Peter makes for a good main character. He’s always moving forward and has his guard up at all times. Even when the stakes aren’t in his favor like when he’s captured, Peter stays focused and even manages to get some jokes in. It’s tough to make him lose his cool and any scene with him was usually quite solid. His girlfriend Hester was also really solid. You know from the start that things probably aren’t going to go over too well for her since she’s infiltrated the villain’s base and is his spy on the inside. When you work with a secret agent your days are usually numbered since you’re not the lead.

Hester is always willing to take risks and help him out and deserves credit for that. Meanwhile I was not a fan of Robin. He’s in a tough spot so of course you do have to cut him a bit of slack but whenever he’s on screen you can see him making the wrong choices. It’s hard to say what he should have done without knowing the context, but with his psychic powers it would have been best if he just took them out. He has a whole lot of power so now’s the time to use it instead of allowing himself to be manipulated the whole time.

The group put him through a lot and effectively broke Robin so it’s tragic but that doesn’t make him a good character either. In the end he couldn’t get past this and was not a likable figure in the movie. His guardian Susan wasn’t good either. Basically her role in the group was to keep Robin preoccupied by having an affair with him even though her heart wasn’t in it. It was just a task for her and it worked for a while which is a strike against Robin for not really realizing. Can’t say I was a fan of hers either, it was certainly a super stressful task though.

Then there is the main villain Ben who is really not that smart sometimes. Sure, things have worked out for him so far so I guess he has some kind of a plan but I would say that he got lucky more times than not. His whole psychic school didn’t seem to have as many defenses as you would expect to keep these powerful fighters locked up. Then his decisions in the ending…man I don’t know what he was thinking. Did he really expect a happy embrace or full gratitude for what he had done? I feel like Ben was really not thinking clearly with how he approached the ending. It makes for a memorable send-off, but it just didn’t make any sense from his perspective.

Finally we have Gillian and as the main character she gets a lot to do but I never felt like she was a great character. She has valid reasons to be nervous about her powers so I understand why she wanted to go to the school (Even if I agree with the mother on the whole thing not sounding right from the start) but it felt like the plot would carry her along. She never seemed to proactively find things out. She gets the main guy into trouble by panicking about her telepathy but beyond that she rarely dives into the fray herself.

Part of the issue here is that it feels like the whole movie could have happened without her and not a whole lot would have changed. Her experiences within the school didn’t ultimately change anything that the film could have just worked around with more intel from Hester. At least Gillian gets to do things in the climax, but of course by then the film is already ending so it’s not like there’s a whole lot of time left by that point.

Also as I mentioned the ending is just bad on all accounts. It certainly goes for the horror vibe at the end as things randomly get super violent. One character’s death is quite over the top as she is spun to death after taking a lot of injuries. You get the big explosion at the end which is also a bit intense but certainly not on the same level. Then one character decides to take the easy way out…even though he knows this could doom another character. It felt so out of character and rushed. The whole climax just didn’t work and that whole thing should have been scrubbed. It’s like the movie decided to abruptly change gears here. If anything maybe it could have benefited from having a sequel.

The setting of the world itself is interesting because I’d like to see how other countries are handling the psychics and what’s going on here. This almost could work as a back-door pilot to the X-Men with the way that the powers were going. If the film had decided to become a full on action I think that would have worked really well too. You just need less experiments and a villain with a bigger goal to really make this work like with the film where kids could enter people’s dreams and were being used as weapons. Now there’s a grand goal and the film had a clearer picture on what it wanted to do. This one just doesn’t go into that level of detail and so the whole thing doesn’t have the full effort that it could have utilized to the max.

Overall, This movie was good for fairly large portions of the adventure but it all falls apart at the end. The ending is one of the biggest things you’ll remember so that was certainly unfortunate. The movie’s really all over the place with the tone as it’s happy sometimes, comedic, then dark and serious, then happy again, etc. A good chunk of this is because of the Gillian plot which would eat up a lot of time but didn’t really change things. I think if the movie picked either Gillian or Peter and stuck to that plot then it would have really worked out way better. You’ve then got one film which isn’t divided up so much. Ah well, maybe next time if they do a remake but in the meantime you can give this one a skip.

Overall 3/10

Dr. Phibes Rises Again Review

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It’s time for Phibes to return once more to try and claim his victims. This film is fairly similar to the first. It starts off a little more traditional as one of those horror titles with a lot of quality dialogue and for a minute there I thought this one was going to shatter the original. Then Phibes actually shows up and this quickly becomes more of the same as the first. If push came to shove I would probably give this one the slight edge over the original but by no means is there a big gap or anything. They are very close to each other.

So of course last time Phibes sealed himself away but it turns out that he actually had a grand master plan all along. A mechanism automatically freed him after a certain amount of time and now he is free to start the murders again. His sidekick Vulnavia is back from the dead somehow but that isn’t really explored. She even feels like a completely different character as she seems to possibly like Phibes now but that’s really a doomed goal from the start since the whole point of his quest is revenge for his wife. He’s not going for the rebound now.

The main character this time is Biederbeck who is working in Egypt to find the river of life. He’s got a good start by grabbing the papyrus and all but now this has put him in the way of Phibes. Phibes will be arriving to take this back since he needs it to possibly bring his wife back. Biederbeck knows that someone dangerous is after him but doesn’t care. He knows that the prize at the end of the tunnel is all his and that’s all that he cares about. I appreciate how tough the guy acts at all times but he never seems to be all that smart in thinking about the big picture. Will Trout be able to keep Biederbeck alive or is this game over?

You can see the dark humor elements a bit more here though like in some of the murders. For example, at one point the villain starts to crush someone in one of those traps where the walls are closing in. As he yells for help, Phibes pulls out a giant fan out of nowhere and turns it on which makes everyone think a storm is brewing. As a result nobody gets up to help the poor guy and he is taken down for the count. The whole thing is rather tragic but there just isn’t anything Trout can do for him.

So you have Trout and his partner laughing about the storm and having comic relief scenes while this guy is taken out. So that was at least one effective use of the dark humor. For the most part I would say the other murders are still on the serious side though and it plays out very similarly to the first film. If you liked the first film then you’ll probably like this one and vice versa. The plot may be different but the story and characters are basically the same either way.

I would say Biederbeck probably isn’t as good as the lead in the first film. It’s close and there are some qualities of his that I appreciate more like not being afraid of Phibes but ultimately you know that he won’t be able to back up the tough talk. Diana was a solid heroine who certainly did her best to talk him down at times, but he just wouldn’t hear of it. Trout is still a fun comic relief character. He’s completely helpless the whole time even though he talks as if he is in control.

By this point the government does realize that Trout’s not doing so great but there just aren’t a lot of other people for the job. Trout’s sidekick gets a little more to do here but it’s not like he’s any more effective than Trout so that’s barely even a consolation by this point. Both of them will ultimately just be standing around while Phibes takes everyone out. That’s really all that they can do.

Because of how direct the film is, there isn’t a ton to say about this one. The first movie had more discussion points like the whole plague theme and everything. This one is just more by the numbers as he goes around bumping everyone off but in a very uninspired way. He’s taking everyone out effectively for sure, but it’s not like there is a big gimmick or anything this time around. To me the most memorable scene is still when he just pulled a giant fan out of nowhere to simulate tornadoes. It’s easy to forget but this guy was a genius after all so it makes sense that he could do stuff like this.

Perhaps leaning into that angle a bit more could have done the film some good. Have his murders all be related to really high tech items that he has created. The more odd and outlandish the better if you ask me. Pull that off and everything will really fall into place. Not sure if that would have actually made this film take the leap all the way towards being a good film but it could have at least given it a little boost. Something to help you remember the film and to differentiate it from the rest.

Overall, This is a sequel that isn’t exactly changing the game in any way. You can really skip it and you won’t miss anything and if you liked the original film then you may as well check it out. I really doubt that you will be remembering it for very long. It’s just not particularly memorable like that so it’ll become a vague memory before long. Maybe one day they’ll make a third film but I feel like this is the kind of movie that almost nobody remembers and for good reason. Horror titles like this were a dime a dozen back then and many more memorable ones have come out over the years.

Overall 3/10

The Abominable Dr. Phibes Review

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I have to say that this film was not as good as I thought it would be. Now granted, it’s not like I was expecting a masterpiece or anything but for the most part you could say that I was getting my sights set on a decently fun horror flick. Instead it taps into that Hammers Productions kind of feel with the deaths being more on the disturbing side and the film’s dark comedy is so dark that it goes all the way around into being rather gritty.

The movie starts with Phibes nearly dying after finding out that his wife’s operation did not go well and she was taken out of the picture. He has now sworn revenge against all of the doctors who were in on this. He doesn’t care to hear if it was an accident or anything like that. He says they directly murdered his wife and so now he is going to get even by inflicting them with the 10 plagues from the Bible. No stone will be left unturned in his quest so can the cops stop him in time or is this going to be game over for everyone?

Detective Trout is on the case but if the name itself wasn’t a giveaway then I can safely say that you’ll deduce within a few minutes that he is out of his league. Don’t get me wrong, Trout means well and he seems like a good guy but Phibes is always a million steps ahead of him. Trout can’t plan more than one step at a time and even gets punched out by the guy he is guarding near the end of the film. It’s like if you had Watson without Sherlock Holmes. Sure, he means well but he probably is not going to take the win in the more difficult cases.

He shares the main character slot with Vesalius who was the head surgeon and naturally the one that Phibes leaves for last. It’s certainly handy to be last because you have more time to prep. Personally I think escaping the country may have been the best bet with his son. It may not stop Phibes but it will certainly delay him right? The guy is also rather old so you just have to stay ahead of him for a few years until he is too old to pursue. It’s an expensive plan but I think Vesalius can pull it off.

Either way Vesalius is a decent main character. He does his best to apologize for Phibes’ wife but of course it really was an accident and that’s hard to really convince Phibes of. The challenge of having to do the same surgery again with his son in the balance is an interesting way to end the film. I thought that was a good way to give Vesalius a fighting chance even if Phibes was fully prepared to rig the game. I liked the parallel there.

This is really where my positives start to fade though. I liked Trout and Vesalius plus the writing was fairly good. It’s got that old film charm which is always nice. The movie also isn’t that long so it ends quickly but what gets the film down is just how grim the deaths can be as I mentioned before. You’ve got Phibes mainly murdering with insects and such as that’s how a lot of the plagues worked. You’ve got tubes with them filled in so the victim has no escape and other such mechanics. Nobody has a peaceful death at all here. It’s a shame since most of them did seem like ordinary folks who didn’t mean any harm and were just in the worst spot possible.

Phibes also doesn’t make for a great villain. He’s fairly generic as one of those mad scientist types but additionally he can’t even talk normally anymore so you don’t get the usual Price dialogue that would have been a lot of fun here. It definitely limits what the film can really do which is a shame. I think that would have added something to the dynamic. It probably wouldn’t have saved the film to be honest but every bit helps right?

His assistant Vulnavia doesn’t have a lot to do but in a way just the fact that she is assisting him with all of this tells you all that you need to know. She’s completely complicit with all of the murders and is even eager to help him the whole time. In the second film she would go on to have more development but as it stands she is just a nameless minion for the most part.

The movie’s ending is suitably dramatic. I thought that was fairly good at least and things don’t end on a sour note. Ultimately the movie just should have leaned into the humor part more. Even though this is part dark humor, I thought all of the deaths were too grisly to really be funny at all. I would not have even guessed that this was part comedy. The sequel leans into it more but this one you would almost think just played it straight as a horror film where everyone is bumped off one by one. It’s surprisingly intense considering how old the film is as well.

Overall, You definitely want to avoid Dr. Phibes. He really makes sure to take care of each of the doctors so you feel bad as you see how futile their situation is. At least he can’t catch everyone but the characters all have good reason to be upset with Trout as well. Naturally you should blame the actual murderer first but Trout wasn’t super helpful. Some of the victims were skeptical of the whole thing and have themselves to blame too so there’s a lot to go around. It’s really quite something how someone super old and broken down like Phibes is able to take everyone out. Shows what a good plan along with the element of surprise can do to even up the score. I’ll have a review up for the sequel pretty soon and we’ll see how that one fared against this one.

Overall 2/10

Jeepers Creepers 2 Review

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This is a review of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative
Looks like the Creeper has returned! The first film was not exactly my kind of tea and I wouldn’t say that the sequel is much better. The setting of being trapped in a bus is better than being in the middle of nowhere but we don’t have the big police vs Creeper fight this time around. The Creeper also seems a little less durable with how easy it is to stab him here but I suppose he tends to resurrect quicker which maybe balances things out. Either way if you’re in the mood for a slasher title then this will fit the bill, but otherwise you may want to give it a timeout for now.

The movie starts with a family farming as they have some lighthearted bickering. This gets serious though when the Creeper shows up and kidnaps one of the kids, who ultimately ends up getting murdered. The father (Jack) decides to take vengeance and prepares himself for war. We then cut to the actual main characters with is comprised of a basketball team and some cheerleaders. Their standard trip home runs into trouble when the bus tires start giving way. The issue is that this doesn’t appear to be an accident as throwing stars pierced the two tires. Minxie gets thrown into the dream realm where she talks with the guy who died in the first film and the one from the intro. They explain that the Creeper is here to eat them all.

See, the Creeper vanishes for 23 years, then he comes back and has 23 days to murder as many people as possible before restarting the process. The good news is the heroes just have to make it to the next day and he’ll go away since this is the final day he has left, but the bad news is that they are only human while this guy has super strength, speed, regeneration, and flight. The team will have to try and band together to beat this guy, but they don’t have as much unity as they may have once thought.

Naturally with a film like this you can bet that the characters aren’t very smart or likable. They’re constantly bickering and fighting among themselves instead of actually focusing on the Creeper. This puts them in a really bad spot right from the jump. Also, there is one action they keep on doing which made me cringe because it is a textbook bad decision all around.

So the Creeper punches a hole through the top of the bus and he can now grab people through it. Sometimes he just pulls their head off or he’ll kidnap them entirely. So…don’t go under the hole right? I mean, he could probably punch more holes through but either way you should avoid the one that is already there. Well, that sounds logical but the characters don’t actually pull this off. One kid in particular constantly walks under the hole and gets caught twice as a result. The second time proves to be fatal, but what was he doing?

It’s pretty easy to make sure you’re not standing directly underneath the hole and yet that keeps on happening with various characters. The Creeper doesn’t always take them out, but regardless it’s not a good idea. It stands out the most because while the situation is pretty much unwinnable the whole time, that’s still got to be the absolute worst decision you could possibly make. Beyond that I don’t mind if you decide to stay in the bus or make a run for it. Both options have their weak points.

It’s more important about trying to stay with a partner as you make a decision so you can watch each other’s back. The Creeper seemingly can be overpowered to an extent if you have enough people but a lot of times the body being grabbed may not hold up anyway. Jack is the best character by far because he actually gives the Creeper a good run for his money. The guy came prepared with some really solid weapons and I thought the movie actually had some good effects here with how the shots played out. You see just how fast the hook fires and how it hits the Creeper before he has time to dodge. It may not have been fatal hits with the first two attacks, but it did show that Jack was able to catch him off guard and deal some serious damage.

The characters aren’t as opportunistic as in the first film though with kicking the Creeper while he was down. In the first film they kept running him over which I thought was a really good idea even if he ultimately regenerated but here when he seemingly dies on the roof they waste so much time bickering again. He just wakes up and by then it’s too late. This group really couldn’t get it together. While I didn’t like any of them all that much, I will give a special shoutout to the main jock for being the worst. I believe his name was Jake but basically he was jealous about not getting to play a lot and thinks he’s better than the other players around.

The reason he’s pretty bad is because he is the one to first suggest sacrificing some of the other kids. That’ always a really bad point to me because it escalates the tensions for no good reason. He’s basically turning the team against themselves. Jake puts a lot of stock into the dreams and prioritizing his own safety when they should just fight as a team. Look at how good Jack did against the Creeper. Surely the teens could do even better if they all paired up so betraying them all was an awful idea.

As for the Creeper, I still can’t say he’s a particularly interesting or good villain. The guy definitely goes for the creepy vibes as he even sticks his tongue out at the group but there’s nothing cool about him. Scenes like that just make you shake your head. In general this film wasn’t quite as out there and over the top gritty as the first one though. You don’t have as many body horror kind of scenes even if they are mentioned. The film still does get very violent for sure but it’s all a bit toned down from the first. It’s also not nearly as scary since the film is going more for thriller moments than horror ones at times so it balances out.

I was glad that we got very solid continuity nods to the first film. I always think a sequel needs to fully acknowledge the original because that’s how you build a strong continuity and I was satisfied with how that was handled here. I also thought the film really had a good ending here. It was really satisfying for one character at least. While the odds may not be in his favor going forward, you like to think that maybe he can secure the win at least for the next cycle. He’ll need a new plan for the one after that but fortunately there is plenty of time to do so.

Overall, Jeepers Creepers 2 is a step up from the first film but it’s in no way a good film or even approaching that level though. It still has a whole lot of weaknesses. The film deserves some credit for actually giving the Creeper some weaknesses so the heroes have a way to win. Even if you know a bunch of them are probably not going to make it, at least there is a path to victory so the whole adventure doesn’t feel pointless right from the jump. If anything it makes me think that the characters from the first film could have both survived if they kept running the Creeper over instead of the guy telling the main heroine to stop for some reason….he wasn’t very smart throughout the movie though so it lines up.

Overall 2/10