Messiah of Evil Review


It’s time for a zombie type of film and unfortunately I can assure you that it is not one of the good ones. There is no real escape for the heroes and while the film maintains a rather spooky atmosphere throughout, it never ends up taking advantage of this. What could have been a really intense cerebral horror film quickly becomes just another slasher to have to contend with. That is unfortunate but not entirely unexpected.

The film starts with a girl named Arletty deciding to look for her father. He left her a note saying not to do this as well as a whole book of notes but she doesn’t have time to read them in depth. When she arrives in town, the place is rather odd. One of the travelers at the gas station seemed rather off and then the town itself is fairly empty. There is an eccentric guy named Thom who is surrounded by girls and lives a life of luxury but it all seems rather empty. Arletty wants to continue on her mission but it does seem like the longer she stays here, the greater her risk of death will be.

Naturally she should have listened to her father’s note telling her not to follow him. That would have ended things right away and surely he wouldn’t have just sent her that notice for no reason right? She also should have read the whole book right away and planned for the worst. Now it’s not like there is a whole lot she could have done against the crazy zombies that would end up appearing but at least she would have been pretty well prepared. Instead she doesn’t really have a plan and always ends up being at a disadvantage.

She’s also a bit too trusting with letting Thom and his friends stay over right away. She doesn’t even know these people and odds are that they were crazy. Even by the end of the film Arletty is forced to take on more of a spectator role here as she can only wait until the inevitable happens. It’s always more fun when the protagonist can actually do a lot of stuff but in this case you could say that she was just a participant in a conspiracy that was much bigger than her. She wasn’t exactly the central focus this time.

Then we have Thom who is a bit of a space case. He tries to be calm and collected at all times but it can feel like a mask. He is quick to subtly threaten one of the girls when he feels like she has been too rude. Thom does well in the fighting near the end but ultimately it wasn’t really enough to turn the tides.

The characters are battling what is effectively an endless horde of monsters after all. Take one down and a few more will take the original’s place. It’s not like the main characters got a debriefing on this either so they’re going into the situation cold. The zombies are all cannibals, so the deaths are particularly gruesome. The film is going for max edge here and that’s really where you knew the film couldn’t come back from. It’s why I’m generally not a big zombie fan, it will usually lead to these kind of events which is hard to write around.

Since the heroes don’t really stand a chance, it also runs into the issue of the whole thing feeling futile. When the characters literally have no possible way to win, it is harder to get engaged into what is happening. If the film kept the threat vague then it might be able to survive on the atmosphere alone, but throw everything else in and you’re not likely going to come back from that.

The film has the cops show up at one point which made for an interesting addition, but unfortunately they are dispatched quickly. The way it was done was also unfortunate because it underscored that you could be turned into a zombie without being bit previously. I interpreted it as the red moon being able to transform anyone who is caught in its rays but of course then that makes things even more unfair. The villains also have a supernatural leader who has intense abilities of his own. That really doesn’t help the case for the heroes.

So the film ends up feeling rather mean spirited with the heroes having no chance and you just slowly watch as they end up dying. There’s not a lot of fun to be had with a premise like that and the film should have tried becoming an action title instead. At the very least, it does serve as a reminder that zombie films are not often going to be very good. If you see that as a genre then you know that you’re probably doomed.

Considering how dreary the film was overall, I’m surprised the ending didn’t have a little more pop. By the end of the film, we know that humanity is going to be destroyed but it’s handled in a very quiet way. I would have preferred that the invasion begins and that’s how the film ends. You may as well have things end in an exciting way like that right? It would certainly make the ending more exciting and memorable at least.

Overall, Messiah of Evil is definitely a film I’d stay far away from. There are no real positive moments to offset all the negatives here. The characters are pretty bad and the film just gets way too gruesome the whole time. It sets the tone early with the gas station murder. If the main characters could have done more damage and set this up as a more even fight then that could have helped. Have the zombies be traditionally slow or something. By allowing them to move at normal speeds like a human, it just makes them completely unstoppable. I don’t see how anybody is supposed to fight off powerful creatures like that.

Overall 0/10

Baron Blood Review


It’s time for a movie that you could tell was going to go off the rails almost immediately. The characters are pretty bad and the whole film is one of the biggest compilations of self inflicted wounds that I have seen in a very long time. Definitely not going to go down as one of the next big horror films and I can see why nobody talks about this one. The baron is not a winner.

The film starts off with a guy named Peter deciding to visit his relatives. He wants a break from the usual routine of school work and what better way than by learning about the legend of Baron Blood? This guy was an ancestor of Peter’s after all. It doesn’t matter that the Baron was known to be an incredibly evil man. Peter is curious to know more about him. So when Peter learns about a spell that could summon the Baron back to life, he doesn’t hesitate to use it. Everyone warns him about this but he doesn’t care! After using the spell, mysterious things begin to happen. People begin to get murdered but surely this isn’t because of what Peter did right? There was another spell to destroy the Baron once more but due to a lot of carelessness, it ends up being burned. Is there any way to stop the Baron?

I think the biggest problem right away with Peter is that he has virtually no remorse for what he’s done. People are literally being murdered in gruesome ways and he’s still interested in how the spell worked. He continues to act fascinated and excited by what is going on even after the negative effects have been well under way. That doesn’t sound like a good character to me. In fact, that sounds like a pretty bad one. He’s more focused on seducing Eva and getting more scientific experience under his belt than saving the day.

For that reason, he was definitely never going to rank. I would also say Eva takes some guilt here for going along with this. Peter may be crazy but she doesn’t have to follow his lead. She could have just said no instead of letting herself get seduced immediately and going against her better judgment. It certainly didn’t go very well for her, that’s for sure. She was a big believer in the supernatural events going on so that’s even more reason why she should have taken a step back there.

Then we have Karl who isn’t as bad but he probably could have taken a harder stance in telling Peter to knock off his interest in the occult. I just can’t put a lot of blame on him because these are all adults so you have to trust in some common sense. Karl went about his life as normal and then once he found out about the threat, he got to work. He certainly felt more prepared than the other two and could at least talk with the cops without sounding crazy while the other two would phrase things in the craziest possible ways.

It’s a tried and true trope of the characters talking to the cops about monsters and actually thinking they will believe it. No shot, and I can’t even blame the cop there. It is a tough tale to swallow. As for the Baron, yeah he doesn’t have a ton of character or anything like that. He likes torturing people, that’s about the extent of personality that he has. He goes around wrecking everyone as much as possible. I guess he also seems to like Eva quite a bit so he has that trait as well which doesn’t really help matters.

You won’t be remembering this guy for very long. I suppose he is at least smart enough to be able to use a disguise and trick the heroes but that doesn’t take a whole lot of skill here tbh. Just about anyone would be able to pull the wool over these fighters! Even aside from the characters, the film had a bunch of issues though. For starters, I found it to be way too mean spirited. Since this guy’s whole thing is torture, he goes around torturing everyone.

All of the deaths are pretty brutal and the film comes across as rather mean spirited There isn’t much of a story beyond the carnage and even though the film’s runtime is fairly short, this will feel like a rather long experience. The movie actually could have been a bit better if the baron had pretended that he’d turned over a new leaf or something. That would have been far more interesting and then you would have an excuse for less violence in the meantime.

I suppose I’ll give the film credit for having some fairly good effects here. Everything is very practical and that can be a lost art at times. Meanwhile the script is fun enough with everyone talking all proper. It doesn’t make up for the writing of course as that is still a lost cause overall but at least that is a silver lining.

Overall, Baron Blood is definitely a film that I would advise you to avoid. In a way it almost feels like the original blueprint to a classic slasher film. The whole film is about the kills and the heroes being unable to do anything here as even they are captured and outmaneuvered. There aren’t any bright spots to raise the film up from the lower levels and you can do better with even the average horror film. Now that’s saying something since the whole genre tends to be on the lower side. That’s just how bad this film was. You can absolutely pull off a jerk main character but in that case I need a more satisfying ending for him. It felt like this guy wasn’t intended to be written like an antagonist, even though he absolutely was one. Never forget that the entire murder spree was 100% his fault. The Baron had been trapped by an immortal spell to suffer forever thanks to a witch and Peter ruined it just for kicks.

Overall 1/10

Hellboy: Blood and Iron Review


Time for another Hellboy adventure. This time we’re throwing in vampires so Hellboy will have to be careful on this one. It’s definitely more intense than the last film but still has a fun charm to it. It does double down a bit with the flashbacks though and the film spends way too much time going backwards there. I think they should have done it all at the start, maybe cut a scene or two in order to keep the viewers in the dark and that would have definitely helped the pacing right from the start.

The film starts off with Trevor, a priest, and a group of soldiers heading into the deep reaches of the forest to destroy the vampire Erzsebet who has been kidnapping and murdering many people in order to stay young and beautiful. Nearly the whole squad is murdered but they successfully defeat her. Unfortunately in the present, Trevor can feel that she has returned. When a guy named Oliver asks Hellboy’s group to see if his mansion is haunted, Trevor quickly says that he will bring the whole A team. This is a little concerning to the rest of the group as Trevor hasn’t been onto the field in years but he refuses to give them any details. So now they will have to figure out what is going on by themselves. Will this really work out?

First off I do have to blame Trevor for a lot of this. He really had no reason to be keeping secrets from Hellboy. He should have told him everything right from the start. Hellboy can take care of himself, but that’s not really the point. As a field leader you need to be putting your guys in the best possible position to be safe and accounted for. Keeping valuable info away is not doing that. Trevor seems to think he can hold his own here with the holy water that he has but the guy ultimately has to hope that he is really lucky.

He is still doing better than the priest though. Lupescu looks terrible in this film as he cracked before the fights had even begun. I don’t get why he was so nervous, it’s like his faith was paper thin without even being tested. I suppose that was the point but it certainly came at his expense. Even by the end I never got around to liking him. As far as I’m concerned, he really got himself into all of these messes and could have saved a lot of lives if he had just manned up when it counted.

Hellboy looks good as always though. Even when he finds out that Trevor is keeping secrets from him, Hellboy doesn’t take it super personally or start panicking. No, he just keeps going about his business and doing his part to help out. That’s why he is a real hero. This time he is in for a fairly painful adventure as well since he is stabbed on multiple occasions and is basically used as a punching bag the whole time. He is almost never in the lead during this film.

That doesn’t stop him from still having a lot of confidence and getting in good burns though. That’s exactly the way that he rolls. Liz gets a lot more to do here than last time as she takes down a group of enemies with her flame abilities. Honestly she probably should have helped more in the climax. At one point she uses her fire and the villain uses it to start burning the others but then they should just get out of the way.

It’s possible that her powers would have had no effect but I would have liked to have seen her using them in action for a longer period of time to really prove that. As for Abe, the poor guy mostly just gets beaten up the whole time. He even gets kidnapped by a pair of old witches so he had a really bad time here. At this point I wonder if perhaps he just shouldn’t be out in the field with the others. Staying at home providing tactical support would probably be best.

As for the villains, Erzsebet gets most of the screentime here. She is fairly powerful and only tends to lose because of her incredible overconfidence. Tackling someone out the window when you’re allergic to sunlight is always going to backfire. She also falls for the holy water trick more than once. A decent villain all things considered but yeah if she was even decently smart then the heroes would have probably been taken down.

The final boss Hecate is a bit more impressive. She doesn’t get to have as much screentime but is quite powerful and gives Hellboy a tough time. Hecate was mentioned since near the beginning but otherwise would almost feel out of nowhere with how she shows up in her true form for a fight. I always like ending a film with a big battle though so that worked for me. I don’t see her ending up as one of the more memorable characters but she handled her role well enough.

The film does have the usual vampire blood drinking but at least not a ton of it. The film is noticeably more violent than the other Hellboy titles but I wouldn’t say it is to a crazy degree. The biggest negative here is still how much you won’t care about what was going on with the soldiers and the vampires in the flashback scenes. Instead of drip feeding this and playing the scenes backwards, they should have gotten it all over with right away. If you ask me, that would have been a much better way to go. Otherwise you need a crazy payoff to explain why the flashbacks had to be spread out like this and I wouldn’t say there is any twist on such a massive level.

The movie is at its best when the characters are all having a good time and messing with each other. All of them were super skeptical about the haunted house which made for good dialogue around the board. At the same time they were professional enough to bring in the equipment and actually check so that was good. The group really needs one more power hitter to fight alongside Hellboy though. Liz has the power but she’s a long range type. We need a brawler who can fight. Otherwise Hellboy is basically by himself like when Abe got shoved aside with ease against one of the minions during the hallway battle. It’s probably hard for the lead to concentrate when he constantly has to save everybody else.

Overall, Hellboy delivers with another good adventure here. It does feel like a bit of a step down from the first two but not by too much. We still got a lot of action and the villains weren’t bad. The pacing gets hurt at times though and it’s not quite as crazy as the first two. That’s another byproduct of the lore part with the vampires. Just let us get right ahead to the story already! That would have definitely pushed the title to the next level. Still, I would have been hyped for more of these adventures to be animated. Maybe at some point they would fight a villain group that mirrors Hellboy’s team. If you’ve seen the first two films then you should check this one out as well.

Overall 6/10

Hellboy Review


It’s definitely been a long while since I’ve seen his one. The original Hellboy film was definitely a fun one and it’s the kind of random superhero film that you don’t see too much of. It kind of just throws you into a pretty big universe of characters and demons running around without trying to smooth it over with the general audience. You either like what they are going for right away or you don’t. There isn’t a whole lot of in between there and that works for me.

The film starts off during World War II with the Nazis trying to open some kind of portal to summon demons. The heroes stop them but find that a small demon has already gone through. He seems harmless enough and so they take him in. The demon is dubbed Hellboy and many years later, has become one of the best fighters in the BPRD. He is essentially immortal or at least has a long life as well as natural super strength and defenses. It’s good to have him on the side of the heroes although there are skeptics that think he should not be there. Some just don’t trust demons.

Well, that is where John comes in. He’s been transferred to help out at this unit as well as be Hellboy’s sidekick. Hellboy isn’t thrilled about this and gets even more upset when Tom appears to begin getting a crush on Liz, the girl that Hellboy likes. Now we have a bit of a rivalry when there isn’t time for one. The Nazi who fell into the portal has been revived along with his main two associates. They intend to continue their plans and Hellboy may be the only person on the planet who can stop them. Is he up to the task?

Now the subplot with Hellboy being upset at John is probably meant in part to be a bit irrational but I actually found myself being on his side. John did see to be trying to make a play while Liz was distracted by her never ending grief and so it was good that Hellboy was there to (literally) throw a rock into those plans. Ultimately it did mean he was away from the base when the villains arrived, but I’m not confident that he would have arrived in time anyway.

Hellboy is a solid lead, someone who is always ready for danger. He definitely doesn’t fear any kind of a threat of challenge and has a lot of confidence in his abilities. Perhaps his confidence does actually outweigh his abilities at times but I will always take that over being underconfident. Hellboy is one of those old school fighters who does a lot of solid posturing while winning the fight. He even has a giant gun that is useless 99% of the time but he still brings it to every mission to fire off a few shots.

Liz is a character who is rather tragic because her flame abilities are incredibly powerful but she has next to no mastery over them. They can go off at any point and often destroy tons of civilians when these outbursts happen. I give the film props for not shying away from that. There’s no quick mention about how everyone evacuated at the last second. No, she’s brought whole buildings down and lots of people have died which is why she is worried now. Definitely very valid.

In a way it does feel like the agency could have handled the situation a lot better instead of just leaving her to her own devices. Ah well, I look forward to seeing her in a more confident state in the sequel. We also have Abe helping the others as the resident mental specialist of the group. Unfortunately he really can’t fight very well so any action scene inevitably leads to him getting absolutely crushed. He was really not prepared for these fighters. Seems like a nice enough guy but you could basically write him out of the film.

As for John, he’s okay. The guy isn’t the most helpful but he does try his best. I do think he was fishy around Liz but other than that he is a decent member to the group. He doesn’t act completely shocked about every little twist which I’m glad about since some humans really overplay their hand in these films. Even if you never knew that demons existed for example, as an FBI agent you should be able to bluff pretty well.

The villains were surprisingly solid here. Kroenen is an experienced assassin who fights with a short blade at all times. He takes out quite a number of fighters in this film and what makes him scary is how he essentially cannot die. He is functionally immortal and will just keep on getting back up over and over again. A super soldier who does not tire, yes that is a fantastic premise for a villain.

Then we have the Sammael creature which also has a hard time dying. It gives Hellboy a really tough fight here. Technically Hellboy tends to always be the underdog in these fights but his endurance keeps him alive long enough to mount a comeback. I liked the design for the creature. Rasputin is a little more on the generic side. Nothing particularly wrong with him but he really has a hard time standing out. He also didn’t plan things out well in the end to put it mildly. The girl who was helping him never really got a role either.

That leads us to the best character in the film, Tom. Tom is one of those guys who just can’t stand demons. There are no exceptions for him and of course that means he doesn’t like Hellboy either. He takes a lot of shots at the demon and makes his voice known. Although this does result in Tom having to run away with his tail between his legs on multiple occasions. He can talk as tough as he wants after all but at the end of the day he is still just a human. He ends up burying the hatchet with Hellboy later on though.

The effects for the film have aged well and I also enjoyed the fights. They could be rather lengthy at times and the pacing is always quick. The film has the characters dealing a lot of damage to each other but never goes too far or feels particularly graphic. For the most part it’s your standard action film kind of action right here.

Overall, Hellboy is a fun film. It’s the kind of movie that ends before you really know it. It has no concrete weaknesses and keeps on moving forward with a very balanced approach. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for a fun action film and the universe around it is fun enough where you may even be tempted to pick up a few of the comics. The romance can be a bit on the weaker side as there isn’t much time to develop it, but we’ll see how the sequel handles that. It’ll be difficult for the next villains to pass this group.

Overall 7/10

Bendy and the Dark Revival Review


It’s time for the next Bendy adventure. I actually beat this one a little while ago so this review has definitely been waiting. Bendy is one of those titles that is always intense and so it’s a good October type of game. It’s fairly short so you won’t be playing it for too long but there is a decent amount of replay value in trying to Platinum the title. You do not want to miss out on this one if you have not played it yet.

The game starts out by introducing us to the new main character. She was working the late shift when she notices just how abandoned the place is. The only one left is the janitor and he tends to act rather suspiciously. Unfortunately the two of them seem to be locked in the workplace now and monsters are appearing everywhere. Is she even still in the real world? There are a lot of questions to answer and no obvious clues in sight. The only rule here is to never let your guard down.

That’s why the heroine does come across as being rather naive or just unintelligent for a good chunk of the adventure. The way she acts just doesn’t make sense at times like listening to a guy who is obviously evil and falling for the most basic of traps. It’s one of those games where you’re basically pleading with the main character not to talk into the 10th trap in a row but there’s not a whole lot you can do about it. In general there always tends to be a lot of backseat driving in a horror title for any medium but I dare say this one was more extensive than usual. You’re just really wondering why she isn’t coming to terms with what is going on.

The gameplay is initially more of an inspection game. You walk around and click on things that are suspicious. As the game goes on you get a weapon and that’s when the core gameplay really changes. Now you’re bashing all of the enemies that come your way with a few exceptions that are immune to your weapon. There is actually a super weapon that can beat them but I never came across it in the playthrough. For the most part I think I did a pretty good job of getting almost all the collectibles but I still missed a few.

You want to use the vending machine as much as possible and constantly hit enemies with the shock pipe since both things help you accumulate trophies. The more stuff you do upfront, the less grinding you will have to do in the post game after all. Same with knocking out enemies from behind, if you get into one of the areas where they respawn forever, I would recommend taking advantage of that.

I would need to go back and get them for the Platinum but that requires beating the game at least 3 times so I would definitely want to space that out quite a bit. There is a form of quick travel in the game that you unlock at the very end but unfortunately it is one of the clunkiest ones that I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to find various sewers and each one takes you back to another location but there is no map and this gets confusing very quickly. I appreciate the attempt but it is something that the next game could improve upon.

The gameplay is smooth outside of that though. Also if you think the action takes you out of the experience, you can play on a higher difficulty where I hear attacking is not nearly as good of an option. Stealth is the name of the game there and that will probably feel a whole lot more like vintage Bendy. I personally like the combat as it turns the whole thing into a full action title but to each their own.

The graphics are really good and you can clearly tell the difference between this one and the last installment. The developers made the most out of the new tech and it also helps with the scares because of how realistic everything looks. There isn’t as much of a soundtrack but of course that’s by design. I would have liked some hard rock tunes of course but it works well enough with what they’re doing.

While the game length isn’t super long, there is enough here where you don’t feel bad about the purchase. You’ve got a pretty good amount of content to go through as it is. Meanwhile like I mentioned earlier there is a good amount of replay value with getting the trophies. The story is also compelling so this is definitely a perfect example of a game that is worth the money and will provide you with a fun experience. You really can’t go wrong here.

Overall, This is definitely a really fun game and one that I would recommend. Longtime Bendy fans will get even more out of it as I didn’t notice some of the guest stars or easter eggs that popped up. It has more combat than the first adventure so you really get to have fun taking out the enemies and progressing through the adventure. It has a good amount of difficulty as well so you won’t just be closing your eyes and progressing through the levels. You’re going to have to work for your victories here and I look forward to seeing what happens in the next story. There is certainly a lot more Bendy to experience!

Overall 7/10

Satellite in the Sky Review


It’s time for a sci-fi film that is a whole lot more low key than you may have suspected. As a result it can struggle to hold your attention at times even though it is fairly well written. The characters aren’t bad or anything but at the same time you do feel like some of the turnarounds are a bit too quick. Mainly the dynamic with the main heroine and the main character but I’ll get into that in a minute. So if you’re up for a low key film about space, then this could be the one for you.

The film starts off with Britain announcing their great Stardust spaceship. It is such a modern design that it will be able to travel in space indefinitely. Captain Michael and his crew are ready but Kim the reporter has a lot of choice words about this. She thinks exploring space is an absolute waste and keeps talking about how the rockets and science are too dangerous. It’s a fool’s game and all that. Now she’s welcome to her opinion but it goes a bit far when she sneaks aboard as a stowaway. That could have thrown everything off with weight limits and all.

Additionally, she is still quick to be flirting with Michael and the two of them hit it off. The tough talk feels like a weak front and the banter while fun, also feels fake. How would this be working out when Kim is insulting everything Michael stands for? They fight a whole lot but I guess all the insults just bounce off. The romance doesn’t make any sense and I don’t know why we needed it when there are two other romance plots going on here with the other passengers on the plane. The film certainly was not lacking in drama.

The biggest drama here is actually that the U.S. steps in to announce that they’ve covertly hijacked the mission to test a bomb. It was a quiet takeover since the U.S. funded the research and it was definitely a good power move. The main characters didn’t like it but ultimately fell into line rather quickly. They knew that otherwise there would be no space trip and they had been prepping for a long time for this mission.

Likewise, as the audience we were waiting a long time for this because it’s not until about halfway through the film that the characters even leave the Earth. I like a good setup as much as the next guy but I was expecting quicker pacing than that. The film is taking itself extremely seriously and I dare say that was a mistake. It might sound counterintuitive, but for a sci-fi film I’m going to be most interested in any issues that occur in outer space.

I think you could have cut some of the general scenes on Earth like one guy fighting with his girlfriend because she had to go to work and couldn’t make their date. He completely overreacted there by the way since he essentially admitted he would have done the same thing if his job suddenly called him in. So why should he be so upset at her for that? He barely even apologies a instead he calls her about a ring and that’s their big reconciliation scene but he needed to be more upfront on owning up to the fact that he made a mistake.

What probably makes the film feel a bit off is how there is no real antagonist here. Yeah you could say the government as a whole would fit that bill but it’s not really played out that way. Yeah the scientists are annoyed about having to work on a bomb but it’s not as if they think the government is suddenly evil. You don’t have the classic saboteur with a gun or anything like that. So the main conflict is when the characters have to find a way to safely jettison the bomb without everyone blowing up. Ultimately it is the power of science that is able to solve this issue. It’s fitting enough but not super exciting.

The film just abruptly ends when they solve the issue. I’m always up for a quick finisher but it does underscore that the characters weren’t really interesting enough to see how their stories ended. I would have liked to see if there was any blowback to the USA doing secret stuff in Britain’s experiment or if that would have just continued to be expertly covered up.

So this film will have its main appeal if you go into it expecting a slice of life. Travelling into space may not exactly be routine but it’s sort of treated that way. Everyone involved in the voyage is a professional aside from the reporter and so they’re rather relaxed about the whole journey. Kim makes sure to try and stress them out but rarely ends up succeeding. I can’t emphasize enough that if you’re looking for an exciting film you will need to look elsewhere. However, if you are looking for a calm experience then this will be up your alley.

Overall, This film ends up falling right in the middle for me. It’s not funny or thrilling enough for it to have any replay value and so I wouldn’t really be recommending it to anyone. On the other hand it doesn’t really make any mistakes and the writing is good on its own. So that’s why it ends up just being one of those films that will be forgotten in short order. Not making any mistakes is a solid start but you also have to have some individual strengths as a film to really make people want to watch it. If you’re going to do a very serious film about what it’s like to travel in space, then you have to punch up the writing a bit with extremely likable characters. Kim actually could have been that character if you just shredded the romance subplot. Have her try to sabotage the mission or just constantly making fun of everyone and then you have a solid antagonist right there.

Overall 5/10

Sensor Review


It’s time for one of Ito’s horror titles. This one definitely brings on the scares but I would say it is significantly less scary than any of his anthologies. It’s just missing that crazy atmosphere those had, but it could be because as a serialized story there is just less chance to be as weird. Also it is scarier than some of the short stories so maybe it was more luck of the draw than anything else. Either way it’s interesting but does have a very weak ending.

The story starts with a girl named Kyoko who happens across a village where everyone seems a bit off. They insist on her sticking around to see the stars with them as they explain how they have cosmic awareness. There was a prophet who used to live there and when he died, his remains were in the volcano and occasionally his golden hair shoots out. The whole thing seems a bit hard to believe but they all die during an eruption while Kyoko is protected by the golden hair. It all merges with her and she now understands the truth of the universe. The problem is that various cults are now after her and she must spend the rest of her life on the run.

This brings us to a reporter named Wataru who becomes interested in the case. Unfortunately the more that he digs into it, the more he becomes tangled within this affair. Why has Kyoko not aged in 60 years? Do these cults actually have super powers or are they just crazy? Wataru’s world is about to go upside down from normal events to something that does more than just border alongside the supernatural. If he’s not careful, this will be the end of his short lived career.

The story works on a mostly episodic perspective until the end. Of course with this being one volume it does move pretty fast during the climax. The story also maintains the mystery angle all the way to the end so for the cosmic stuff you just have to roll with it. Kyoko has vague powers regarding seeing the future and being able to read people’s minds but she is unfortunately not able to see her own future and can’t read the minds of the characters who really matter. By the end it’s hard to say how much is still her and how much is the cosmic awareness within her actually trying to get out.

It makes for an interesting storyline but it does come at her expense. We never got to know her for very long so it’s hard to really say what her real personality was. She is a good character though and stays strong no matter how many trials she goes through. In a way it would be an interesting predicament to suddenly have all knowledge but to the point where it is crippling so you have to actively turn your cosmic mind off and on at times.

Meanwhile for Wataru, he’s completely out of his depth the whole time. He’s not bad but a little slow on the ball. It feels like he spends the whole series confused. For a while there it makes sense but once he’s seen enough things, I think he’s just got to roll with it. It should be obvious right away why people can’t see him in the past and for the stalker girl who was after him, he needed a more aggressive approach once she was working with a whole evil organization. Now there’s not much he could have done about all of that, but that’s why he needed a more aggressive front.

The stalker girl was probably the most interesting antagonist though. In some ways I would say she is the scariest because she’s a total psycho and with her magic powers, no cop can stop her. So Wataru has to truly live in fear whenever she shows up. Her eventual goal of merging with him would also be super scary. The cult leader gets some intense visuals but the reason he’s less scary is probably because his goals involve the cosmos and you can tell that he is absolutely over his head. In a sense that makes the terror be a bit less because he can’t accomplish his goal, compared to the girl who could crush Wataru.

Aside from the general horror, the volume also goes into some gross horror which tends to always be a thing with this author. There’s one story about a bunch of suicidal bugs who want people to smash them and then they regenerate to do it all again. Definitely some tough visuals to look at but I will give the author some credit. It’s such a specifically spooky concept that I don’t think anyone else would have come up with that.

Some of the stories in the anthology could go a bit too far in different areas as well while this one feels more on the same side. You can tell Ito isn’t afraid to tackle any topic and the volume is still dark but at least people are mainly dying in normal ways this time. They aren’t drowning in oil or anything like that. It would be a bit tough to recommend this volume without knowing a lot about someone’s threshold for all kinds of horror though. Then for people who are huge horror buffs, some of this might be a little too subtle with the slow burn approach to really get them.

So the appeal feels like it would be rather narrow. Also like I mentioned, the ending is really underwhelming. I feel like it’s going for a full cycle kind of ending but even if it makes thematic sense, it’s just not very satisfying. I would have either liked a big victory for Kyoko as she finally cuts loose or more of an epilogue showing what she is doing now. Otherwise the ending just feels a bit weak because it’s going to take place over a long time frame that doesn’t really end up affecting the Earth for a while. Maybe I just needed a bit more of a classic horror fake out or something.

The artwork has that classic Ito feel to it. While some background characters can start to look really similar, the abstract nature of the art helps to make it very scary. The art also goes really hard for the big zoom ins when you have a villain with a scary face or some other shocking visual like that. The style works perfectly for horror like this and will definitely keep you at the edge of your seat.

Overall, Sensor is definitely an interesting manga. It’s one of those very eerie titles where everything is just a bit off. I don’t think it’s Ito’s most effective or engaging one as the plot isn’t super interesting but it will still have you doing some thinking. I also think whenever you can get the reader to be slightly unnerved, it means the horror is succeeding. The volume also manages to do it with minimal shock value. It’s still not necessarily my thing and I wouldn’t rank it too high, I would sooner re read it than some of the others. It would also make for a pretty fun movie. So if you like horror, then you should definitely check it out.

Overall 5/10

And Soon The Darkness Review


It’s time for a film that really reminds you to follow common sense and to be careful when travelling in a strange land. There are all kinds of things that can go wrong when you’re in unfamiliar territory after all and that becomes apparent very quickly. Unfortunately the film is going to rather extreme methods to point this out and the film quickly ends up going for the low hanging fruit here. Certainly one relying on cheap tension to keep you at the edge of your seat and so that’s not going to be a winning strategy.

The movie starts by introducing us to Jane and Cathy who are biking across France. They don’t really speak much French but this seemed like a fun way to spend the holidays. Unfortunately Cathy wants to take a break in the middle of nowhere and the two were already off the beaten path. Jane points out what a terrible idea this is as it will be dark out pretty soon but Cathy doesn’t care and goes back to sleep. Jane is forced to go on without her and sure enough, Cathy vanishes and is presumed dead. Jane doesn’t want to give up on her but night is approaching soon and a mysterious guy keeps on following her. This feels like trouble.

I am going to blame Cathy for a lot of this right from the start because she was being completely unreasonable. You can’t just decide to go to sleep when the place is already dangerous. That doesn’t make any sense and she resists all of Jane’s efforts to make her get up. So when Jane eventually leaves I could not blame her because staying there would have just resulted in both of them being dead. Yeah leaving your friend is always rough but it’s not like Jane could physically force her to get up. That would be an even fight at best and then you have to drive both of them with the bikes.

Cathy also didn’t seem to have much of a sense for danger with how she was encouraging the weird stalker throughout the opening. You probably want to be keeping your distance at that point instead of thinking about how cool he looked. So yeah she played every part of this as badly as possible and definitely made Jane’s life a whole lot harder.

As for Jane, she was a good friend the whole time. She went out of her way to try and help Cathy by taking a lot of risks and doubling back to find her. Jane would have been all the way to safety immediately if she hadn’t had to go back. Jane also studied so she knows at least a little bit of French which helps out. It may not be enough to speak the language but she can tell when a translator is lying about what is going on at least. Ultimately she was much sharper about her surroundings and wouldn’t make anything easy for the villain.

As for the mysterious guy, Paul, well he definitely does a terrible job of trying to look normal. He tends to be very quiet for large parts of the film and when he speaks it is always to say something that just makes him look more suspicious. I can’t forget how he asked Jane if she wanted to search deep in the woods with him during their first real conversation. That’s something only a possible serial killer would say right? Throughout the film we learn about how he’s lying to her on several occasions and in the past another woman was murdered around this spot.

The film very much enjoys its misdirects and twists but does so in a very low effort way. Basically it makes people act very suspiciously and in ways that do not make sense in order to help trick the audience. So it’s basically cheating by that point and will have you shaking your head. There is a very small cast here so you’ll probably see through it pretty quickly but it doesn’t help make the experience any better.

Meanwhile of course the film would immediately not be satisfied with just murdering the heroes and so the threat is very quickly escalated into being more than that. So now as the audience you have to hope that even if Jean dies, at least it’s quick because the motive for the villain is going to be rough. It’s what I would call cheap tension here. The film isn’t confident that it can actually make you nervous on the basis of the writing or characters so it has to add on extra elements.

The villain gets away with a bit too much here and I definitely wouldn’t have minded missing out on the details. Even the climax of the film has to go on with this rather than just having a quick fight. Yeah this movie was definitely doomed and it’s a very dreary affair. There aren’t many lighthearted moments ere at all and the film’s pacing isn’t always great. They don’t translate any of the dialogue in order to help you experience how lost the main heroine is. I understand the goal here narratively but it also means there are just more scenes that are effectively gibberish.

The film will also probably hit harder for people who have ever been tempted to do something like this. Biking across the country as a way to explore the unknown does not interest me in the slightest. It’s not something I would ever want to do and even if it was guaranteed to be safe, it’s just not my cup of tea.

Overall, This is one of those films that definitely feels rather mean spirited. It’s definitely collecting all the things that can go wrong if you wander into the wrong area but you don’t really need a whole film about that. A simple disappearance or getting lost in an unknown territory could make for a good suspense film. Once you add in the threats of being assaulted by creeps and other elements like that, then it just feels like one of those cheap thrillers you might come across on TV. It’s not a film that is seriously trying to impress you with a good message or anything like that. I would definitely say to avoid this one as much as possible.

Overall 1/10

House of the Dead Review

This review is of the TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

House of the Dead is one of those films that’s very infamous. It doesn’t have a whole lot of big defenders to be honest. Mostly it just gets a lot of mocking and you can see why. The film is definitely not taking things very seriously and some aspects like the music are definitely not general audience friendly. Ultimately it is a bad film but I dare say it does manage to defeat the average horror flick.

The movie starts with someone reminiscing about how things were before all of his friends were murdered. We then flash back to the actual movie which is always a very annoying way to start a movie. Why even let us know that one of the characters is going to live through this? Well, there’s a big rave taking place on the island of the dead but a few teenagers were running late so they missed the boat. They’re forced to pay an extremely high price to hitch a ride with the only boat left in town. The captain’s first mate isn’t particularly nice and the captain is certainly not making things easy but this party is a once in a lifetime event. The problem is when they get there, all of the people are gone. Instead there are only hordes of zombies. Can the heroes manage to take them down??

You may be wondering what happened to the house. Well, that appears near the end of the film but really this should have been called the Island of the Dead. Most of the film is really about them trying to survive on that island while they are attacked by endless rounds of zombies. The heroes fortunately are able to get their hands on guns and other weapons with which to defend themselves. It’s really the only way to fight back and they manage to get pretty good at using them.

Where the film is probably going to lose some people is when it becomes a full on action. Once the heroes get their weapons, this very quickly stops being a horror film and quickly leans into the action all the way. We get a ton of slow mo scenes and a very extended fight where the heroes are shredding all of the zombies. I didn’t have a problem with the length but the slow motion effect does get old rather quickly. The long fight is still the best part of the film though. I’ll take an action over a horror any day after all. There is a little plot armor in how the humans are faring so well here though.

The film is very inconsistent about how physically strong the zombies are as well as their speed. It all appears to just be at the level that it needs to be for the scene. The scene transitions are also a bit too random with all of the video game clips randomly showing up. It could have been fun once or twice but it happens very frequently with no real rhyme or reason to it. Definitely not the way to go here.

Meanwhile the soundtrack is actually very good for most of the film. There is a lot of good rock themes as well as just generally fast tunes which really fit in well with all of the fighting. That’s something that has actually aged really well so I appreciated that. The visuals can be rather hit or miss but I did enjoy the choreography for the battles. One character actually knows martial arts and gets to pummel several characters that way.

While most of the characters are annoying teenagers, I did really enjoy the boat captain. He was at least trying to make sense of what was going on here and also didn’t show any fear. He was particularly impressive in his very first encounter with a zombie because he just casually shot it while still smoking his cigarette. That takes a lot of guts right there. He was also the reason the others even had weapons with which to fight the zombies so without him they would have all been dead very quickly.

I also enjoyed the policewoman because she was smart enough to put aside her beef with the captain to fight against the zombies. I know some lesser characters who wouldn’t have adapted like that. She did really well in her fights as well and ultimately only got held back by the others and the ammo starting to run low. It does make sense that with all of the shooting they were doing, they would eventually run out of bullets.

This film didn’t really need a main villain though. An endless horde of zombies is already scary enough right? Well, we do get a mastermind at the end and he even gets an origin story. The scenes just make everyone else look bad because there is one moment where he goads a guard into getting close enough to destroy him. Whenever someone loses to a guy who is fully chained up, I’m going to have some problems there.

There also isn’t much to this villain. He just craves violence and got immortality. It’s not like he has any kind of a master plan or anything. He just does whatever he wants and that’s not exactly a recipe for success. He does put up a good fight in the end but it’s barely even a consolation because he should have won that fight. Losing just makes him look even less impressive.

Naturally it goes without saying as a zombie film that this one can be pretty violent. You have a ton of characters getting slashed and destroyed during the mayhem. So if you’re not big on all of that then this would be a reason to stay away. It might have slightly more restraint than other zombie films as it doesn’t usually dwell on the deaths but yeah the violence is still at a high level here.

Overall, This film had some good ideas but could not land the execution. While I enjoyed some of the adult characters like the captain and the policewoman, there was nothing good to be said about the teens. The fact that some of them didn’t even care when the rave was empty just shows that they aren’t the smartest characters in the bunch. Any semblance of romance here just feels obligatory as none of the characters seem mature enough for it and they take too long to get serious about this. Of course if you’re planning to go to a Rave on an island in the middle of nowhere, I’d argue that your moral compass may already be in a rather dicey spot. You should only check this film out if you reallllly like zombie fighting and even then you will have to sit through a bit of a slow first half before the zombies even appear.

Overall 3/10

Final Destination 5 Review

This review is of the TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Final Destination is back once again to remind you that the heroes never stood a chance! This one at least ties back to the original compared to the last stand alone one but in the end it is a marginal victory at best. This is not the kind of film that is going to end up ranking for you at all as it is still suffering from all of the usual issues. It feels bad, but what can you do right? At least we do have a big fight scene here against an opponent who can actually be stopped.

The film starts off with Sam and his coworkers all heading into the company bus. Sam has been slacking off at work and his friend/supervisor Peter gives him a warning. Unfortunately they are all brutally murdered on the bridge as the whole thing collapses. Things were not supposed to go like this and so they all have regrets. Well, there was one survivor, Molly. Sam was able to save her at the last second but then he wakes up right before the accident happened. This time he saves a handful of them but the coroner shows up to remind them that Death’s going to slay them all one by one. Sam doesn’t want to die, but how can he stop it? The cast are given one clue, they can murder someone to switch destinies with but that would make them no matter than a common criminal. What should they do?

Now obviously this is Death’s rigged game so do you think murdering someone would actually let you off the hook? The film makes sure to answer that question and it should come as absolutely no surprise to anyone. The whole point of these films is that Death just wants an excuse to mess with a bunch of people for no real reason. The coroner acts like Death is upset but no it’s all part of the game and I bet this guy is in on it. I like how smug he always is as he warns the characters of their impending demise. Not because there’s some way for them to get out of this, but because there is no escape. They are doomed to all die violent deaths.

Poor Sam seems like a reasonable character. He’s not particularly noteworthy or anything but at least he’s trying to help out and do the right thing. I would argue that he can appear to be dangerously naive at times though. In particular the scene that calls out to me is when a drunk Peter appears at the entrance of his restaurant in the dead of night. This guy has been acting rather crazy and violent for a while now and you really think it’s a social call? Naturally it’s not and that takes us to the next life or death moment. It just feels like that’s a point where you need to already be ready to fight and he seemed shocked by the whole thing.

The same thing is true for Molly who is very slow to react to Peter’s long speech about those who don’t deserve death. It was pretty clear what he was driving at there but she didn’t put the pieces together. It’s the little things like this which meant that the heroes would have a harder time surviving. Sure, they can’t beat Death but perhaps they can at least beat the human antagonist running around right?

Of course I have no real sympathy for Peter. Yeah he got a raw deal with what happened to his girlfriend and it was particularly brutal but jumping into murdering other people is immediately a step too far. He needed to rage against the system, like find a way to defeat Death, not take it out on the other victims. He just went crazy too quickly. It’s not surprising and unfortunately it’s probably realistic that a good amount of people would do that but it certainly hurts him as a character.

As always the film has an issue with being over the top violent. All of the deaths are pretty intense and definitely are ones you will want to avoid if you aren’t big on violence. The deaths continue to do their best to top the previous films and while it’s hard to say if they succeed or not as it gets relative after a while, they certainly do their best. The special effects are certainly out there.

I will give the film credit for probably having the best of the shock endings. You sort of see where it’s going as soon as the scene starts out. I would argue that the main characters look a bit naive here. I was half expecting Sam to say something like: “Wow what’s wrong with that guy? Lol” Now granted, the film tries to spin it like he didn’t hear what the guy said but after what he’s just been through, he should be taking everything 100X more seriously than usual. Ultimately it would have been futile. I know that but you gotta try to last as long as you can in these things.

Overall, This is definitely another Final Destination film. There isn’t a whole lot to it story wise and while the characters are better than in the last one, I wouldn’t say that any of them are super likable either. My favorite would either be the cop or the manager who was working with him but both of them go out in rather unfortunate ways and you were rooting for them to be able to put the pieces together. Instead, they’re really just here to spin their wheels and not actually make any real progress. The sad thing is that you could cut them out of the film and literally nothing would change. They ultimately had no impact on the film which is a real shame. This could have been something for sequels to build off of.

Overall 1/10