Hereafter is a film that deals with the old question, “What happens when we die?” Well, as a Christian I know that I am going to Heaven and that Hell is also a real place where many will go as well. I’m not going to go to the “White Beyond”, the “Eternal Nothingness”, the “Final Slumber”, the “Next Life”, etc. So, with the basis for the film’s plot already solved before the film has begun, could it still be good? Let’s see!

There are three different plots where we see the main characters. We have George, Marcus, and Marie. Let’s go through the plots one by one and see how they fared. This way we can cover all of the bases and I will also comment on which plot was the most interesting. I will also cover which one was the least interesting and I may as well say that it wasn’t even close.

The first plot that we will go with is Marie’s. “Why?” you may ask? Well, Marie’s was the first to appear so it makes sense. After getting hit by a Tsunami, (she should have played more video games. It probably would have increased her reaction times and it may not have been such a close shave.) Marie decides to take a break from her job and write a book. (It’s too bad since the job was pretty interesting)

Unfortunately, she decides to change the complete plot of the book which leads to her being alienated from her employers. To their defense, she did change everything without their consent. I would have been pretty disappointed as well. Eventually someone picks up her book, but will people take her seriously? She believes that she saw a glimpse of what comes after death, but it’s hard to say what it was. She consults many people, but they aren’t really of any help.

Let’s go to George’s plot. His is definitely the best since it starts to delve into the realm of super powers. George has the power to communicate with the dead. This can come in handy, but it’s also a sad power since it always involves death. He doesn’t really use it for petty reasons like winning the lottery or finding out who makes the best pizza. Instead, he lets people find out what their dead relatives had to say…for a price!

George retires from this and decides to work in a factory. Unfortunately, there are the inevitable budget cuts and this isn’t a very stable way to live for the future. George goes to a cooking class, but things don’t go very well for him. (He never even gets to make a pizza!) Can George show the world that he doesn’t need his powers to be rich and famous? To be honest, there isn’t really much more to say about his plot. It was fun thanks to the super powers and the cooking part was intriguing.

Marcus had the worst subplot. He’s not even going to get 2 paragraphs for the summary! His brother is murdered, (An assisted murder is still a murder. They didn’t mean to destroy him, but that’s essentially what they did. Although we can call it an “accident” if you want) so Marcus tries to find out how he can bring him back, or at least talk to him. His foster parents are pretty cool, but he doesn’t give them a chance. His real mother appears a little towards the beginning of the plot and at the ending. If only there was a character who could talk to the dead… Why was this plot the worst? The quick answer is that I don’t really find kids entertaining to watch in the movies. I don’t know why, but they’re usually pretty boring and Marcus is no exception.

The three plots all meet up towards the end. It’s intriguing, but there’s not really a big payoff. There is a very rushed romance at the end. It definitely didn’t help the film and shouldn’t have been included. I don’t see why films feel like they need to add this. Melanie wasn’t a very good character either. Thinking about it, Neuvic was also pretty awful.

So, this is a film that was…okay. It’s a drama film that includes some romance in it so you weren’t expecting me to give it a really good score right? If you’re into the genre, then you’ll probably like it. The characters aren’t really that great and there are no noticeable music. The forced romance can be a bit much and Marcus’ subplot wasn’t that great. Personally, you’d be better off watching Kanon. That is a drama/romance that manages to cut away most of the romance and makes the drama a bit better. Did I mention that there are demons?

Overall 2/10

I believe that this is the first film of the franchise that I have reviewed. I have seen the others, but they were before my reviewing days. (And I don’t plan to re watch them, just so that I can get the reviews!) Long story short, I’m not a fan of the series and it tends to bring shame to the pirate name. (Rhyme intended!) Could this film switch things up since it would be so different? Well….let’s see.

Trying to cover the plot is usually tricky in these films. They are after the Fountain of Youth, but they spend most of the film getting caught up in the sub plots. Jack Sparrow is being impersonated (He’s the main character) by another pirate and he’s (Very) mildly upset. He tries to get his title back, but since his doesn’t have much in the way of sword skills, he may need help. He’s never been the most loyal ally to have in a fight and you can never tell what he’ll pull.

After the events of the previous film, he doesn’t have the Black Pearl and he doesn’t even have a crew. Jack Sparrow can’t really be called a Captain at this point and he’s mostly just having fun doing nothing. Blackbeard and Barbossa are around so at least we have our villains right? Well….if you can take them seriously. One of them ended up selling out while the other doesn’t make for a compelling villain. James Bond could probably defeat these guys in a fight and I’m sure you know how embarrassing that is right?

Angelica is the pirate who impersonated Jack Sparrow. Somehow this ploy actually worked since nobody has enough respect for the Captain to even remember how he looks. The Government also gets involved, but they don’t look very good for the entire film. Jack Sparrow ends up outsmarting them a lot of the time. (They did have 1 good scene where they outsmarted him though)

There’s one thing that I should mention. If you’ve seen the other films in the series, you’ll probably already know this. Still, this must be said so that all can beware. There has never been a single interesting character in the series! Every character in the whole franchise is unlikable (Monsters not included, but can be subject to the rule) and they really get on your nerves. It’s just sad how many mistakes these guys make. They wouldn’t last long in a tactical battle.

The Pirate films tend to be pretty long and this one still manages to crack the 100 minute mark. That’s not Very long right?…..you’d be surprised. They always drag on when Jack Sparrow is involved and this is not an exception. The camera can get very dark so you don’t really see what’s happening, but maybe that’s a good thing. There are less zombies and undead guys running around so there aren’t as many “Gross Out” moments in this one. On the other hand, we have the mermaids who don’t really add anything to the film.

So, what’s the verdict? I tried to make it painstakingly clear through the review, but let’s quickly go through the run down. Bad characters, Convoluted Plot, Bad Camera Work, Drags On, etc. The graphics still feel very old and this doesn’t look like a recent film. I don’t think that the series will be able to turn it around and we are going to need a reboot. To be honest, I actually preferred this one to the earlier films. That is definitely not a good thing! If you want a film with real pirates and cool action scenes, check out One Piece! You won’t regret it!!

Overall 2/10