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The Conjuring Review

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This is of the edited TV-14 version of the film and all thoughts below should be read as such. A review of the uncut version would likely be more negative as edited versions help to address my complaints for a product…typically.
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October continues and the next horror movie has been selected. Unfortunately, we’ve finally run into a stinker. This film is definitely one of those films that reminds me why this genre almost always backfires on me. This film made just about every mistake that it could including some blatant animal violence that was just really bad. This film was really toast and with or without the animal violence, it was not a good film. Well, let’s get into this!

As you would expect, a family moves into a new house and it’s actually haunted. Weird things start to happen in this place. Spirits roam the halls and all animals that get close to the house go insane and get strangled. The family decides to call in the professionals to help them, but is it too late? Can the spirit really be exorcised or are the main characters doomed to be destroyed in this house? Get ready for a ton of “jump” scenes (No such thing anymore if you ask me. 5 Nights at Freddy destroyed that concept by surpassing it and turning it into a meme) and despair for the heroes.

This film doesn’t really do anything new with the horror genre and just plays to all of the usual genres. We even get the usual kids who get terrorized by the spirit the whole time and one of them has a habit of sleep walking. The kids are fairly annoying like you would expect. The parents aren’t bad and are actually better than normal, but they never actually make the leap into being likable characters. The professionals are likable though. Lorraine can see visions and Ed knows a lot about the paranormal so he gives advice to the people that he helps. They’re both very respectable characters and know what they’re doing. It’s good to have two characters here who believe in God and do a good job at helping out. So often you see priests or other figures from the Church in these films come and get overwhelmed by the spirits. I remember one film where the priest went into the house and immediately left as the spirits started to wreck his hands. Here, Ed and Lorraine are crucial to victory.

A Christian has nothing to fear from demons and while they have power, it is nothing against God’s. It’s always interesting to see films about demons because unlike vampires, werewolves, or ghosts, I do believe that demons are real. We’ve seen them several times in the Bible, like in Matthew as Jesus helped people who were possessed by them. In that sense, the film did a good job of recreating how a person who is possessed would probably look. Even if it was pretty gross to see the guy who was bleeding out of his eyes.

Of course, the film was doomed right from the start with the animal violence. Why bring in a dog if you’re just going to kill him off right away? There are also a lot of birds who die during the film as well. It’s just distasteful, just like the rest of the film in a nutshell. It’s all just a pointless endeavor and you will be looking at your watch and any clocks that are around as you wait for the film to be all over. Aside from the animal violence, it’s also one of those films that can get quite violent and gross at times. One guy’s cheek is bitten/slashed off and the flashback with the possessed guy, which happens more than once doesn’t help matters.

It’s why Horror movies are typically doomed for me. I don’t mind random spirits running around, but films want them to be extra scary so they’ll have them terrorize the heroes for a while with disturbing images like bleeding or flashbacks with people being hanged. Not only does this fail to inspire any fear from the people watching, but it just helps to take away more and more points from the film. The important thing is for the film to at least be interesting, but after you’ve seen the same formula done to death dozens of times, it loses that appeal. At least films like the Grudge have some neat visuals while you’re waiting for the heroes to die or run away from the house.

Horror films from the olden days were typically a lot better than the ones that we get now. Look at the Abbott and Costello films or even one that was taken seriously like Haunted House on the Hill…something like that. Even the old Kaiju films like Godzilla if they still count. Those were horror films that didn’t need animal violence or random shock value scenes. They got you hooked with the solid writing that was present and the engaging characters. I feel like films nowadays can’t handle those things so a horror film will already be fighting with one arm tied behind its back and that’s a losing formula.

There is a bit of a twist ending here, but not really as it’s just a fake jump scene that never actually happens. Whether that was the intent or not, it didn’t do the film any favors. With such a low score, you can tell that I just didn’t like this film. Films about possession have never really caught my eye and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. Who knows, maybe a film will prove me wrong someday…maybe. It just probably won’t happen anytime soon.

Overall, The Conjuring is another film that’s just no good. As it’s involved with the Amityville Horror, I can’t say that I’m surprised. That film was also a mess. Adding in the fact that this film was originally R and you can also see why it was toast. Edited or not, the film got that rating for a reason so the gruesome aspects will likely be enough to jeopardize the score as well. What we need is a very tame horror film that relies on suspense and drama as opposed to visual cues. That’s a horror movie that would have some potential, but it likely wouldn’t generate the same amount of clicks that one like this would. Ah well, it’s just how it goes.

Overall 1/10

House on Haunted Hill Review

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Whenever I see a horror film that is actually quite good, it’s hard to contain my excitement. It’s like going to McDonald’s and the cashier letting you know that they’ve brought back the McPizza. It’s really hard to top that. While this film ends very abruptly and I felt that more could have been done with the story, it ended up being a very nice adventure. The film was fun and also very short so it never got to drag on. I don’t think I’ll be forgetting…the house on Haunted Hill!

A happy family moves into a new house after experiencing some financial trouble. The father found a very good price for a house on an old hill where a graveyard used to be and people have died there every year for the last century. Strange things start to happen. Only one person ever notices these events so the rest of the family don’t believe the tales. Soon, shadows appear at night, noises come from nowhere, and a demon begins to walk around. Is the house haunted?

No worries folks, that’s a plot for another horror movie. This one’s a little more original as an eccentric millionaire decides to invite some people to a mansion to stay the night. If the guests can successfully stay for 24 hours without dying, they shall receive 10000 dollars. That’s no small number and the 5 guests were chosen because they all really need the money. How can they refuse such an offer? One man actually stayed at the mansion once before, but went crazy and nearly died so he is now an alcoholic. Another guest is a lady who is the breadwinner for her family and this would help out a great deal. A psychiatrist, a newspaper person, and your average main character round out the 5. The choice of leaving is taken out of their hands when the mansion is sealed shut by the hired help and the characters prepare for their long night. Annabelle, the wife of the millionaire (Frederick) begins to drop clues for the heroes that her husband plans to murder her..not the ghost that everyone (almost) suspected. Is she telling the truth? She is clearly at odds with Frederick, but both characters talk to each other about the chance for murder.

Naturally, this means that one person must be planning to murder someone. There wouldn’t be a film if it was all fun and games the whole time right? Of course, it could always be the ghosts, the heroes shouldn’t eliminate that possibility before they have dinner. With 10000 dollars at stake, the main characters really have to be ready for just about anything…so they split up as soon as possible.

A lot of strange things happen to the heroes when they get into the house. A chandelier nearly destroys one of them off the bat, but a quick dodge stopped this fate. It’s fun to see the heroes overwhelmed the whole time and the situation grows more and more dire. That being said, after seeing the final twist, you have to wonder about some of these moments. Did the writers know what was going on? Were ghosts really a part of the picture?

Well, to answer the second question, I feel like the answer is a resounding yes. It’s never proven, but I feel like the sudden ending actually helps my case. You are clearly supposed to draw your own conclusions and come to terms with your own ending. We never actually saw the night end after all so did the heroes actually manage to stay alive right up til the end? The drunk claims that they are doomed and while I would take his word with as much salt as my average Super Smash Bros opponent, ghosts just make sense here.

At several points, things happened that can’t really be explained. The first of which being the part where the main guy was knocked on the head by someone…or something when he stepped into a dark room. Sure, it could have been the maid…but that’s more than a little iffy and I don’t buy that. At the very least, the guy would have known who hit him since she’s an old lady and the wound didn’t make sense. Another iffy moment was when the maid appeared in the shadows and seemed to float away, but the main guy did not see her. It was as if she turned invisible in the middle of the room. That’s certainly iffy. Minor things would be the piano playing by itself and the chandelier falling down, but we could attribute those to good timing by the villains I suppose.

In my ending, I’m confident that all of the heroes ended up dying in the mansion. The facts just seem to lead that way for me. That being said, the film isn’t afraid to deal with plot hax either. When Annabelle…dies, it just doesn’t make sense. Sure, you take the professional’s advice, but I think everyone knows the difference between a dead body and one that is asleep. Of course, it did ensure that someone would become the prime suspect for you, but I just don’t see this ploy working so smoothly. Another iffy part was the gun that everyone was given, which was loaded with blancs. Surely someone would have tried unloading their gun to see if it actually had any ammo right….?

Since I’m going all in with this review I may as well mention one more piece of plot hax. That would be when a lady starts to back away from a bedsheet that is flying towards her. She took several long looks at the vat of acid that was behind her, yet she kept on going until she practically threw herself into the pit. The bedsheet was so slow and obviously fake that she could have done anything else for a better result. Her decision just felt odd if you ask me.

While I did poke a lot of holes in this film, it was very entertaining as I mentioned. The characters were all decent as you would expect from a retro film. The Haunted House had a nice atmosphere about it and the introduction to the film was extraordinarily well done as everyone arrived in a funeral car. The writing in this film was very good and while the threats between Frederick and Annabelle could get tiresome (Even resorting to the classic pulling hair tactic) it didn’t stop the characters from having meaningful interactions with the other characters as red herrings. They’re both cunning and while the 5 guests are not, they try their best to solve the mystery rather than simply be used in a grander scheme.

Overall, House on Haunted Hill is a good horror film. It starts to become a mystery thriller as the film goes by, but this is what I like to see in a horror film. I still have mixed feelings on the ending as I dare say that it may have been too sudden, but I can see what the film was driving towards and it’s better than having a dragged out ending I suppose. Leaving the audience to come up with the ending also saves the writers some work. The film is only about an hour, but manages to fill it in with a whole lot of plot and details so I definitely recommend giving this flick a watch. With Halloween and my Domino’s desserts coming up, it’s a good time to give this film a shot.

Overall 7/10

Hold That Ghost Review

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It’s always good to see a comedy tackle the classic horror tropes since the characters can really go about destroying them in a systematic fashion. As this is the month of October, expect a lot of scary or “scary” films coming up. Hold That Ghost is a classic film that has certainly aged well even if it reuses some gags quite a few times to really get the message across. You would never guess that this came out all the way back in the 1940’s!

Chuck and Ferdie find out that they have inheireted a hotel/mansion from a gang member who they nearly followed to the grave. The criminal didn’t trust anyone so he gave them his inheiratence since they were nearby. That’s simply how his will worked. A shady character takes the heroes to the place, but then the car drives off, leaving the heroes stranded. For reasons unknown, the driver brought along a few suspicious characters including two ladies and a scientist. It turns out that the place may not be as normal as it may appear though. A mysterious ghost starts to go after Ferdie. Of course, as Ferdie is the comic relief character, nobody takes him seriously.

Now, in order for you to like this film, you’ll need to be fine with slapstick comedy as there is quite a lot of that going around here. This is a Costello film after all so it can be incredibly exaggerated at times with his actions and lack of intelligence. In a sense, you can say that the Costello films are sort of like the Adam Sandler films and how they could have been back in the 40’s since most of the terrible dialogue and writing from the modern era wouldn’t have arrived yet. I’m actually okay with this kind of comedy as I’ve actually grown used to it through Knuckles in Sonic Boom and have come to appreciate the subtle burns that these characters get. They may get pushed around a lot, but they fire back when necessary as well.

Ferdie tends to take every line directed at him literally, which means that any figure of speech results in an intriguing conversation. Ferdie just never learned most of the things which we would consider to be common sense so he pants like a dog instead when the ghost starts to scare him. It’s not entirely his fault as the main heroine doesn’t see the ghost even though objects are moving right in front of her. You start to feel a little bad for Ferdie since nothing ends up working out well for him. He loses some of your sympathy when he tries to steal the money at the end of the film though. He also lets his “friend” bully him around the place which is certainly not a great move.

As for his friend Chuck, the guy’s not quite as charasmatic although he’s a decently good character. He can go a little far with how he treats Ferdie, but the two seem to still be friends somehow. Chuck does try to help Ferdie find a new room after he is haunted several times, but he just doesn’t believe Ferdie most of the time. The evidence of any haunting is typically gone by the time Chuck arrives. Chuck is the reasonable character after all so he doesn’t believe in ghosts and is always kept out of the loop.

Most of the film is really just about these shenanigans as the ghost messes with everyone and Ferdie is the only one who seems to know about it. Finally, we get a big fight scene at the end as the true identity of the ghost shows up along with some gang members. The Ghost’s reveal was actually a little iffy and I’m still not entirely sure who exactly was the ghost. Whichever member it was certainly wasn’t that brave as Ferdie and the gang were enough to scare him. Still, the battle royale between the heroes and the gang was certainly a whole lot of fun. Each side had to brace themselves and jump into the action! Ferdie got a lot of good hits as you would expect, but the other members didn’t do so bad either.

I hadn’t been expecting the fight so that was a nice touch. The ending was also nice as the main two characters finally got to own their own tavern. The journey was tough, but arriving at the destination was likely very satisfying for the heroes. It was a peaceful ending and I wouldn’t have minded a bit of a twist, but it fit the tone of the movie. The film never dragged and it was an enjoyable title. Nothing out of the ordinary happened and essentially played without any surprises, but this is the kind of film that you can watch and leave feeling chipper.

This is a great example of a film that likely wouldn’t be as good if it was made in the modern days. For one thing, this is a comedy where the dialogue stays classy. A modern version would likely add a lot of swear words and suggestive lines. Some aspects of the film also just age better here like the shoot and run gangsters from the beginning. It’s just retro to see them here whereas in a modern film, it’s a little hard to picture it working smoothly. The camp factor is also just hard to picture in a really modern film although it’s certainly possible.

Hold That Ghost is really like a live action Scooby Doo film. It’s simple and to the point as the heroes try to retake their tavern and maybe earn some money along the way. It the film had kept running for too long, like an extra 30-40 minutes or so, then it likely would have dragged. As it stands, this was my first Abbott and Costello film in quite a while so I’m not tired of their routine yet. I actually hadn’t expected this film to really be a true comedy so it was a pleasant surprise. That’s the loophole for horror movies, just add a comedy angle to the mix and it should help the score dramatically!

Overall, Hold That Ghost was a fun film. Admittedly, the supporting characters could have been better. The radio actress’ scream when not in danger and lack of one during the real spooks was a decent gimmick I suppose. Her rivalry with Ferdie at times was intense I suppose as they fought in a classic splashing contest..unless I’m thinking of the Waitress. They were pretty similar in apearance although different in personality. The Doctor also wasn’t that good. I didn’t mind him at the beginning as he started to brag and did look like Clark Kent, but then his romance plot started and that was game over for him. He lost his charm and his ruthless wit. If you like comedies with a lot of slapstick and quick banter, then this is the film to check out. The Ghost can’t be taken seriously, but he’s not supposed to be. You can sit back and enjoy the show!

Overall 7/10

Cinderella (2015) Review

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Cinderella is a classic film and I actually got a chance to review the original about half a year ago. It’s a pleasant film and you can see why people are so fond of it even if it’s not my cup of tea. That being said, the remake leaves a little to be desired. It tries too hard to be emotional and some characters like Cinderella’s father look pretty bad. I’d also argue that Cinderella herself isn’t a great character here.

I’m sure that you are all aware of the story. Cinderella’s mother died when the girl was still young and then her father decided to marry someone else and then leave home for a few months. He died while overseas and Cinderella went from being a girl of high standing to a slave. She finds magical strength through her fairy god mother and marries the prince so she can regain her social power. The plot limits the film’s potential, but if handled right it could still be good.

First off, I did not like Cinderella’s father at all. He certainly doesn’t come off as being very smart or wise and he is played the entire time. He marries a widow who has two rather mean spirited kids and then leaves Ella to fare for herself. I’ll just stick to calling her Cinderella since it held up I suppose. You just have to wonder how the father did not notice how sinister his new family members were and he was very oblivious. I also felt that he moved on too quickly even considering that there was a time skip. He was a very unlikable character.

Naturally, he was not as bad as the step sisters. They’re bullies who pick on Cinderella the whole time and since the main character doesn’t know how to fight or engage in verbal fisticuffs, she’s easy prey for them. Cinderella’s step mother is also fairly mean to her as she just wants to be rich and doesn’t like Cinderella from the start. Dealing with the three bullies turns out to be too much for the delicate main character.

Even Cinderella ended up being an unlikable character in the end. I like main characters to be nice. It’s a good trait and one that you don’t see as much as I would like. The problem is that Cinderella is a push over and there’s a very fine line there. Keep in mind that the place was still hers, but the step mother asks her to move to the attic and Cinderella allows this. The step mother gives her slave chores to do and slowly takes away all of Cinderella’s possessions. “Did she just walk up slowly and wreck Cinderella’s dress?” Props if you got the meme reference, but Cinderella basically allows herself to be a verbal punching bag for the new recruits.

One scene where you will also be frustrated with the main character is when she allows the cat to almost destroy one of her little mouse friends because the step mother stared her down. Cinderella seriously has no backbone in this film and allowing one of her friends to see his life flash before his eyes was the last straw. You’ll have a tough time finding a weaker willed main character no matter what film you decide to watch. Naturally, the romance was also nothing special and Cinderella was basically just escaping her situation. Falling in love with someone after meeting them for like 4-5 minutes is certainly iffy by any stretch of the imagination.

The prince was decent and I’ll give him kudos for not hunting the animal that he nearly destroyed. Hunting is wrong and now he has learned his lesson for good! His plot had some drama as his father died and there was a traitor in his army, but I actually preferred this plot to the main one. The royal characters were all fairly interesting and it’s always nice to see their social power. The bullies wouldn’t be able to stop these guys so the Prince was able to have his justice at last.

I think you can probably tell that this film is getting under a 5. For the most part, it’s a fairly charming film, but it starts to fall to pieces once the father dies as the bullying starts and drags on for quite a while. Another negative is actually the costume designs. I haven’t actually had to launch a complaint against a live action film for this in quite a while (Since the Charlie’s Angel days) but there is a lot of cleavage and it’s very overdone. The film was simply trying to copy the style from back in the day, but it’s still excessive and just not done in a classy way. The film could have easily used the same style of clothes without making it a different size. It’s a rare negative for live action films, but that just makes this error all the worse. I actually thought this since the trailer for the film first came out and I was sad to see that the film hadn’t changed.

Cinderella’s fairy god mother also didn’t look too good in this film either. For whatever reason (For comedy) she did not know what she was doing and came off as more of a novice than she should have. The original Fairy God Mother is fun because she’s a pro and with enough prep time, she can take down any foe. This one nearly destroyed herself by making a pumpkin too large and her scenes actually managed to drag on quite a bit. This is why changing things from the source material backfires so often. It’s simply not done most of the time and the film needs to recognize and accept this before moving on.

Due to the film taking place back in the olden days, there isn’t a whole lot of colorful scenery to look at. That’s too bad and while it’s not terrible, you could easily pass this film off as a 2005 film rather than 2015 and that’s always a bad thing in my book. Seriously, a 2015 film should look modern and this film already feels dated in some areas.

Overall, Cinderella’s plot simply isn’t for me so a future film will need to really change things up in order to win for me. For starters, Cinderella should be a nice lead, but she shouldn’t just let herself get bullied the whole time. Honestly, writing out the step sisters and all of their cringe worthy dialogue would be a nice step up for the film. They simply aren’t needed and just keeping the step mom around would keep the plot virtually the same. That, or just having one step sister. The film does try to have its comedy moments at times, but they’re pretty uninspired. This film may try to take you for a ride, but sometimes the best thing to do is to simply step off. If you’re looking for a good romance drama, I recommend watching Yugioh Bonds Beyond Time and just remember that a drama without romance can still be a very good film!

Overall 4/10

The Age of Adaline Review

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It’s time to look at a romance/drama film that came out a while ago. The film actually got a lot of promotion and you would see the posters everywhere. I never got to see a trailer for the movie, but I can’t say that the posters really intrigued me. Upon viewing the film, I can confirm that my suspicions were basically right on the mark. This film could have been a whole lot better, but fell into some rather large mistakes along the way. This is why romance and drama are two genres that need to stay far away from each other unless they are handled very delicately. Don’t forget though, this is apparently an epic as well!

Adaline used to live a normal life. It may not have been perfect, but she had a family and a nice car. Well, her husband couldn’t quite make it as he died early and Adaline took an unwise drive through the forest when she fell in a ditch and drowned, also being zapped by lightning afterward. If you’ve watched shows like Dragon Ball Z or Prince of Tennis, then you know that this kind of thing isn’t fatal. The lightning actually helps revive Adaline and stops the time within her body so that she is now immortal. The film tries to play this off as actually being possible, but the reasoning is so fake that you just feel like laughing at the super serious/almost condescending narrator. Now that she is immortal…what will Adaline do with her life?

She originally decides to just live alone with her dog while avoiding the government. Her daughter is around 60 by now so they visit each other discreetly at times, but Adaline forgot to take up a hobby. That probably would have made being immortal a little more bearable. She could have started a website or something and fans could wonder how she had it for 160 years. She would never tell anyone that she owned it of course. Her life changes forever when a rich book reader shows up and decides that he wants to be with her. He flirts and flirts until Adaline decides to give him a date and the full hollywood treatment.

Again, this is why many romances in films are just so bad. First of all, it sends the wrong message. Adaline flat out denies Ellis (the guy) multiple times, but he doesn’t take no for an answer. He follows her to her job, blackmails her as he would take back his donation from her library if she didn’t go out with him, and also finds out her home address from her co-workers (Who should really know better than to be handing these things out) Finally, she does go out with him and a day or two later, they’re already in bed. That’s basically the definition of a poor romance. You know what’s a much better one? Cinderella. It may not have a whole lot of personality at times and it may be a pairing that we’ve seen over and over again, but she was modest and the romance develops at a much better pace over there. In Adaline, it’s the modern version that just doesn’t work.

Ellis is a terrible character, I definitely did not like him at all. Adaline was decent for the most part, but the Ellis plot dragged her down and she breaks down a few times, which really weakens her character. She takes the being immortal condition as a cup being half empty when she should have just taken it in stride. Who wouldn’t want to be immortal? (Actually, I wouldn’t want that ability on Earth, but that’s besides the point) There aren’t a whole lot of supporting characters although Ellis’ dad gets a fairly big role as we find out that he used to be close to Adaline. Adaline should have taken more precautions to make sure that she wasn’t recognized, but I suppose that it was tricky. Either way, it also makes Adaline look dicey once again as she flirted with another person for so long. It may have been like 50-60 years ago, but that’s still a bit much.

One thing that really hurt the film was the animal violence that occurred at one point. It was just senseless violence that shouldn’t have been included in the film, but was kept in for shock value and that emotional roller coaster. The dog’s liver or his ribs was failing so Adaline put him down. That’s the kind of plot that was simply unnecessary and I would have preferred for the dog to not even appear if it was all going to end like that. Poor move by the film.

Age of Adaline really should have focused more on the immortal plot. The government who was trying to catch Adaline was a fairly interesting storyline although I wouldn’t want to see any actual experimentation. Just the chase and seeing Adaline evade them for a while would have been neat. All of the fake science talk was interesting in a parody sort of way and I wouldn’t have minded more of that. This film could have easily been a mystery thriller instead of a romance drama. It’s all in how the film chooses the handle the plot.

The problem with the romance has already been explained and the drama doesn’t work as the characters take everything too seriously. Get ready for a lot of crying over just about everything and it gets to be a bit much. You’ll probably also see the ending coming a mile away for the picture perfect ending for Adaline. Without the twist, it may have been more of an epic way to end things. I certainly would have liked that and then we could have had an action sequel.

As for the writing, I’m afraid that it’s not so good. It’s not terrible, there will just be a line once in a while that will make you wince, like Ellis’ sister, who comes out of nowhere with her bad one liners. Ellis’ dad also wasn’t that great as he just created a lot of tension for the lolz and the film should have shown that he had totally moved past his old flame. The memories should have been ancient history for him.

Overall, this sounds like a pretty negative review right? Well, it is to an extent. The film just makes too many mistakes for me like the rushed romance or the animal violence. I can’t say that any of the characters are really likable although the blind lady from near the beginning wasn’t bad. I would have liked to have seen Adaline just living through the decades with a few people finding out about her here and there. That would have been soooo much more interesting. If the film played up the drama and emotional moments a little less, it would have been a much better film. If you’re looking for a good romance/drama, check out Tsubasa Spring Thunder. It gets very emotional while also being epic.

Overall 3/10

Batman Unlimited Animal Instincts Review

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It’s been a while since DC has been able to deliver a good movie, but I had high hopes for this one after seeing the trailer. It would get away from the excessive violence and bring us the classic Superfriends atmosphere that we had been waiting for. As expected, the film was fun and lived up to my expectations. I could have done with some more hand to hand action towards the second half, but it managed to avoid having many negatives and as the film is quite short, it is something that I could definitely recommend to others as a quick superhero watch.

Mysterious animal related crimes have been surfacing in Gotham City so Batman and his comrades decide to check it out. Batman is evaded in his fight and Cheetah manages to defeat Nightwing with the help of Killer Croc, despite the Flash coming in to help out. The heroes are systematically defeated at each and every turn so Batman decides to take the initiative. Meanwhile, the Penguin decides to make a new building and it ends up being the tallest in the city. Could he have some kind of plan to go alongside this or is he just trying to have fun? The heroes will have to try their best if they want to stand a chance here!

All right, let’s quickly talk about the technical aspects first. The soundtrack was surprisingly good and fast paced. It really fit quite well with the action scenes. I think that the music could have been a little more pronounced though so you could really feel the action, but it was still better than expected. The writing was also pretty solid as you would expect from a Superfriends inspired product. Keeping in this atmosphere for future films would be great!

As for the animation, Batman Unlimited looks good. I doubt anyone will be making a case for it looking great, but it can hold his own when necessary. The opening action scenes actually looked quite good and that’s a plus of being so modern. Even relatively low budget films can still look quite good. One thing that I noticed was that the film would use a longer roll animation than necessary so every time the character hit the ground, they would keep on rolling and rolling. It’s not bad though, just something to notice. The night scenes ere all handled quite well.

That being said, I didn’t care for most of the character designs. I really liked Batman’s costume, but that’s about it. The hair styles of the various characters were just off and the Flash looked really odd the whole time. It reminded me of Superman and the Elite to an extent. Good animation can help to negate the character designs, but it was still very iffy. Nightwing’s hair probably stuck out the most to me. Luckily, the voices also helped to mitigate these losses as Nightwing’s was perfect for his character and Red Robin also got a really good one. DC really pulled out the stops for this one.

All right, for a negative, I’d say that the Flash looked really bad. It goes beyond simply plot hax as he is made to be a bit of a joke here. It’s similar to the treatment that Green Lantern got in Justice League War, which I still find to be quite sad. Flash gets tripped by Cheetah here and Man Bat takes him out in a single blow. His high speed punches also have absolutely no effect on Killer Croc, which was just embarrassing. He was treated as a bit of a rookie here and even if this is Wally West, that’s still a bit much. Red Robin was the main comic relief for the film, but he was handled well. What he lacks in hand to hand combat, he makes up for with his intense one liners. I order Sliders from Buffalo Wild Wings myself so I can see why Red Robin was in the mood for it.

Nightwing certainly looked good here. He was on point the whole time and never lost sight of the mission. He felt like a mini Batman and you can be sure that the Dark Knight is pleased with his progress. He may have lost to the villains the first time, but those guys managed to make all of the heroes look bad on several occasions so it certainly wasn’t his fault. Green Arrow also looks good and we get to see him relatively early in his career I’d say because he was still waiting on the patent for one of his inventions. Green Arrow looked good and while he still seems like a bit of a second rate Batman, he isn’t a bad character.

Naturally, Batman looks the best from the group and whenever he decides to take charge, you know that the heroes are about to do well. I don’t care for his Space Dandy design, but this is a Batman who knows what he is doing and that’s always a good thing. He knew how to make a cure for Man Bat and he figured out how to track the villains right away. Batman doesn’t get to look much better than this, his portrayal was spot on.

As you may expect from the film’s short run time, it’s essentially just a compilation of action scenes. There is always some kind of action going on. It can get a little repetitive to see the villains escape the heroes so often though as that really shouldn’t be happening. The heroes had the villains outmatched the instant that Flash appeared. Without him, it would actually be an interesting fight, but I can’t ignore the presence of such a heavy weight. The film probably could have used a better array of villains, although it was a fairly decent team. Cheetah makes for a decent threat, Killer Croc is tough, and the robot Ape wasn’t bad. Man-Bat and Penguin could have been more interesting or imposing though. I’ve never been a fan of those two.

That’s why the sequel looks like it could end up being even better than this film, although I’m being cautious for now. I was pleasantly surprised with some of the fight scenes after all and the film was just enjoyable to watch through and through. This is why Batman Meets the Green Hornet needs to be adapted into a film like this one. I have a feeling that it would prove to be quite the entertaining movie!

Overall, Batman Unlimited was a fun little film. There’s certainly not a whole lot of depth to it and you won’t be forced to ask yourself the tough questions, but it’s a really fun superhero film that will remind you of the good old days. This is certainly the best animated comic book film in a while and it felt like DC’s answer to the Marvel’s Heroes United Run. I’d say that DC took the win here as expected. In the sequel, I want Superman to be added to the roster! I saw the trailer a while back, but that was quite a while ago so I forgot most of it. I’ll be sure to check it out again soon. Let me know what you thought of this film once you see it!

Overall 7/10

The Wrong Man Review

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The Wrong Man is a unique film in the sense that it is a drama and a drama film. Those two sound almost the same though so it was probably just an error on the Google Search…maybe. I always like good retro films as the writing is always strong. I’d call this film a success although I did have one issue with the film that was decently sizable and kept it from being an epic 8. There’s another issue that holds it up a little in the realism angle, but it doesn’t affect the final score. Hitchcock says that this thriller is even more intense than some of his “fictional” ones and he’s probably right as the mix of court room drama and mystery made this a solid experience.

Manny is your average joe. He has a steady job and is known as a very dependable fellow around the neighborhood. Everyone knows him as a nice guy, but he is suddenly confronted by the police one day to answer for a list of crimes. He has apparently committed theft and assault several times. When asked, Manny claims innocence to all of this, but he is telling the truth or is he just trying to get off easy? Only time will tell!

This is supposedly based on a true story and I can believe it as I’m sure that cases like this have happened in the past. That being said, if we’re treating the story as if it really happened, then some scenes really stretched that line in the movie. There was one part where the cops decided to have Manny copy the letter that the criminal wrote to see if their handwriting was the same. It turns out that they were almost identical and Manny also made the same typo that the crook did. That was a little much if you asked me and at that point, I just figured that Manny had a split personality and did do the crimes. I think that this makes more sense than the alternative that the film gave us. That was the only scene that hurt its credability in terms of realism, but one scene is all that you need for something like this.

The only problem that I actually had with the film was the part where Manny’s wife went insane. It happened so suddenly as she was fighting for his innocence one day and the next, she had quickly fallen into despair. Apparently she had already been dealing with this, but the sudden breakdown was still a bit much. It was also very unnecessary to the film if you ask me. The film really would not have changed almost at all if she had stayed strong. The film would have also been more fun that way and Manny could have had someone else on his side. We do get a happy ending for her after a timeskip, but it just furthers the point that this plot was really shoehorned in.

Back to the realism part for a second. It is a little iffy how two of Manny’s witnesses just died so mysteriously. I suppose that mystery films need some red herrings, but everything was conveniently against Manny. He probably would have been doomed in court, but at least he had the character witnesses of his boss and the hotel owners. What he lacked in evidence and proof, Manny made up for with personal connections. I ended up liking his lawyer even though the guy seemed a little fishy at first. He pulled through when it counted and noticed that the jury was very bias and against Manny so he quickly called for a rematch. It was a very good choice on his part and I had barely even realized what the jury was doing. This guy certainly knew his stuff.

Manny was also a good main character. He could have handled the situation a little better I suppose, like talking to the owners of the shop a little more. It’s possible that it would have helped them realize that they had the wrong man. Manny also acted a little suspicious when his wife started to talk to the lawyer about possible witnesses and he quickly made an excuse to leave. Extra red herrings I suppose. The wife was likable before she went insane. A decent heroine, but that subplot hurt her.

I did like the cops as they tried to give Manny a fair shake the whole time, despite the fact that they had basically decided he was guilty from the start. I guess they figured that lying to his face would calm Manny down. The fact that they did call his wife was very iffy though. That just felt shady. These are the cops, not the mafia. What’s with all the secrecy? A few times, you would have thought that they weren’t on the level,but since this is based on a true story, I disregarded that notion since it would have been a little too fantastic. (In the original sense of the word, not good, but just unbelievable) “An innocent man has nothing to fear” is a line that the cops use quite a lot and it’s a memorable one. While it is only mostly true, it’s still something to keep in mind when you’re falsely accused. If you’re a modern film lead, you could even crack a bunch of jokes despite the severity of the situation.

As you would expect, the writing and the script are spot on. Even when Manny and the cops are starting to get a little heated, they use sophisticated burns to stop each other. Another suspicious character was Manny’s step brother, but he ended up being on the level so that was good for the lead. Manny certainly couldn’t afford to have any more enemies in this film. His two sons were also all right I suppose, but you could also call them filler and I’m glad that their roles weren’t any bigger.

The main draw of the film is simply the suspense as the mystery hooks you in. I thought that the film was very enjoyable and the mystery was handled well. I also really liked the court scenes and still love those. There wasn’t as much back and forth as usual since we mostly only saw it from the attacking side, but it was fun nonetheless. The film’s decently long, but doesn’t drag out. I would have liked to have scene the fake Manny a little more, but it wasn’t necessary to the plot I suppose. While the characters looked similar, I still don’t see how it fooled so many of the characters.

Overall, The Wrong Man is a good retro film. The suspense is certainly real and Manny is put through the ringer. The court case was fun and I liked all of the cop interrogation scenes. They were definitely enjoyable and the cops were portrayed as they should be. They knew their job and completed the mission without a whole lot of difficulty. It was also fun to see the old meatstore owners take out the criminal near the end. They definitely had gusto! I certainly recommend this film if you’re looking for an old fashioned mystery and a story about a man who must prove his innocence no matter the cost! There are no real negatives in this film aside from the wife’s subplot so you can just kick back and enjoy the show!

Overall 7/10

The Man with the Golden Arm Review

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It’s time to look at another old film, but this one won’t fare any better than Harper. In fact, I’d say that Harper actually ends up having the edge here as this film’s main character may be worse than Harper He definitely doesn’t make a whole lot of correct choices and the subplot involving his wife can certainly tire you out very quickly. Granted, the film does sound better than the film, where the ending seems like it would be a little more dicey.

Frankie has just gotten out or rehab and he’s looking to get a new start on his life. He is getting our of the dealing game and he doesn’t intend to do drugs anymore. That being said, it’s tricky to keep to this goal as his wife is constantly trying to shoot his hopes down and she does not want him to succeed. She pretends to be incapable of walking to keep Frankie together with her. The guilt tripping tactics prove to be quite effective. Can Frankie end this cycle?

Well, this film definitely wasn’t for me. I’m all for a slice of life film, but this one wasn’t very interesting. Moreover, I never like watching the guilt tactics work on the heroes so easily. It’s similar to “Whatever Happened To Baby Jane” except it’s not quite that bad. At least Frankie can still leave, he just doesn’t really think about this option enough. His mistake if you ask me. The whole film his wife is pestering him and it gets really old fast. Not to mention that Frankie should have known that she could walk the instant that he found his drumsticks on top of the high drawer. That’s a little suspicious and the fact that she tries to sabotage his career the whole time is also a little iffy.

This film mainly deals with the problems of drugs and how addicting they can be. Any vice is extremely hard to break away from as any long time smoker can tell you. So, Frankie’s battle against it is fairly realistic even if it does take up way too much screen time in this film. The problem is that he keeps making all of the wrong choices over and over again even though he knows that it will cost him his job. It’s definitely a pretty serious addiction that he has going for him and if not for his wife, he probably would have beaten it right away. The stress just got to him though and then he kept on relapsing over and over again. It certainly doesn’t make for an enjoyable watch. So, while this is a topic that isn’t tackled all that much, it’s probably best to leave it for the documentaries or it’ll be a bit of a downer.

I would have been content if more of the film had been about the dealings as Frankie was a part of an underground card playing association. The games were definitely high stakes and I love watching card games. That certainly would have kept my interest as those scenes were the best part of the movie. Once again, Frankie made the wrong call and it came back to bite him. That’s really the story of his life and I definitely did not like him.

The villains are naturally unlikable although, the underling of the drug dealer was always fun to watch as he panicked during the card games. Molly was a good supporting character and she was really the reason why Frankie managed to come out of this film in one piece. She was certainly a very helpful character and one you could root for. The plot with the drunk person was a little iffy and maybe Molly should try not to go overboard with the whole being nice thing, but she tries. Frankie also had another friend who helped groom dogs. That guy would support him, but also got Frankie into trouble by bringing him stolen shirts. It was another unfortunate moment for the lead although he should not have accepted since he knew that they were stolen.

The soundtrack was definitely intense and whenever Frankie would go to get a shot, a really quick/ominous theme would play. It was actually quite memorable and that’s more than I can say for most movies so I’ll give the film a lot of props there. It’s not every day that you see such a stellar soundtrack. It’s a shame that the rest of the movie couldn’t have been that good. I was also glad that a dog got to appear for a while and nothing happened to him. Not including animal violence in your film is the first step to success. While this film couldn’t rise above that, it was still nice to see.

There is also some action in the film. Not a whole lot of course, but one guy is slammed to the ground and another one is pushed off of a tall staircase. It was an impressive show of strength for one character although it made the other person look a little iffy. Why would you threaten to shake someone’s life to their core when you’re going to turn your back to that individual while laughing? The villain clearly did not think his plan through at all and certainly regretted that course of action. Then, we have the quick chase scene at the end. You can almost feel the tension in the air as the main characters make the tough calls…almost. It gets quite fatal for at least one individual.

Overall, The Man With The Golden Arm wasn’t a very good film, it was actually a very bad one. Part of the problem is that it just didn’t live up to its name. His Golden Arm allowed Frankie to be great at card games and music, but both of those areas were not explored as well as they should have been. Honestly, the title is a little misleading and I suppose that you could dig up some other meanings behind that like how he always got the drugs in that arm, but it doesn’t eliminate the fact that you may have expected a different movie. I certainly didn’t expect such a large portion of the film to be about his drug problem. It’s good to raise awareness on such things and hopefully get people not to take drugs, but it comes at the expense of how much you can enjoy the film. I just didn’t enjoy this one and the run time felt like forever while watching it. Just think of the movie as being like a bad hotel experience. You arrive with great hopes, only to find that it’s an empty room with nothing to help you pass the time. That’s the essence of the film in a nutshell. If you want a good retro film, then your best bet is to watch the original Astro Boy TV show.

Overall 2/10

Harper Review

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It’s time to look at an oldish film from the 1960’s. It’s pretty old, but not old enough in the sense that it makes some modern mistakes. The film is also a little too long and drags out quite a bit. While the ending is decently good to an extent, you’ll find yourself struggling to find any likable characters in this film, which makes it difficult to be invested in the plot.

Harper is a private detective and a very good one at that. (Or so he thinks) He is hired because a man has disappeared so his wife wants Harper to track him down. This won’t be easy as the guy may not have been on the up and up with the law. The lady wants to find out who her husband has been cheating on with as well, but little does Harper know that things might be a little more serious than that. So begins his wild goose chase across the state.

See, the main plot is derailed for quite a while, as various other plot lines come up. Technically, Harper is on the trail the whole time, but the film moves at a snail’s pace. We slowly meet the supporting cast like the daughter, Harper’s old friend, and a guy who likes to hang out at the Beach. As mentioned before, none of these characters are very likable at all. Harper’s the kind of guy who acts like he’s not interested in women with all of his tough talk, but he still takes time to stare at the daughter when they first meet near the swimming pool and he basically acts like the kind of guy that you wouldn’t want to be around.

That’s not even mentioning the fact that Harper isn’t even a very good detective. He talks tough, but is constantly knocked out whenever things get dangerous. For example, he walked into a bar and started threatening one of the characters so he didn’t notice the bouncer sneak up behind him for a quick haymaker. He was then too dazed to do anything during the fight so he was quickly wrecked. This happened again in the final minutes of the film as he enters the villain base and figures that nobody was home. Well…he was wrong! Harper definitely comes across as a rookie at times.

The daughter was a pretty terrible character as almost all of her lines were just for flirting purposes. Her character lacked any real depth and she really had no bearing on the plot. Despite Bacall being a rather big name, she really had a very small role in the film and didn’t get to do anything. Harper’s friend wasn’t cool either and he was attracted to someone who was way younger than him. That’s certainly not a great way to start off his character arc and the ending doesn’t make him look any better either. Finally, the swimming guy doesn’t mind leading the daughter on even though he’s no attracted to her. He’s definitely not a good person. We also have a former star who gained weight. Her role was larger than I would have thought, but she definitely didn’t help the cast.

The daughter’s extended dance scenes at the Beach and the completely unnecessary romances in the film didn’t help its case either. The film was certainly trying to go for that James Bond feel as you can tell from the posters and it didn’t go over so well. Not to mention that there’s a random scene near the end where the villains torture someone for information using a cigarette. It came out of nowhere and Harper naturally couldn’t be bothered to come to the victim’s aid. He naturally waited until the ordeal was over because he’s no hero.

As mentioned earlier, the plot isn’t very interesting either and the story could have been told in half of the time. An example of a subplot that could have been cut out was where he pretended to be a guy from Texas who fell in love with the old actress. The scene went on for quite a while and while she ended up being important in the end, the scene could have been greatly shortened or removed from the movie altogether.

For positives, well, the writing was solid. Naturally, you wouldn’t expect to find a whole lot of language here and there was none. Such is the beauty of the old classics. The witty banter goes between the characters easily although it’s still not as good as the average classic film thanks to the daughter and the fact that her lines simply aren’t good.

Another positive would be the ending, which was certainly original and not what I had expected. It essentially leaves the decision to the viewer as you decide what happens from here. I certainly know what my guess is. The guy in the car will shoot and the other one will yell for help so one of them dies and the other is arrested. That sounds like a fair tradeoff to me although Harper still didn’t look so good right up until the very end. The fact of the matter is, he doesn’t know if he is going to bring a murderer to justice. No matter who the person is, murder is murder and it’s not like it was in self defense. The guy shot someone who was already helpless and on the ground…he should get no sympathy from Harper.

The car chase scene was decent although you can certainly tell that they don’t make cars the way that they used too. One car breaks down from going down a very small hill. A current car would have just kept on going and going. It’s a neat contrast although it certainly wasn’t intended as such. I’m always up for a chase and since there weren’t any real fight scenes to be found here…it’ll have to do.

Overall, Harper was not exactly a winner in my book. It succeeded in its attempts to be like a James Bond film as it fell into all of those pitfalls. The romance, the dragged out feeling of the movie, the unlikable characters, the unprofessional main character, etc. The film had it all and that just wasn’t a good thing. I’ll give it props for the ending, but that’s about all that I can give the film at the moment. If you want a good classic film, check out Godzilla or the old Superman and the Mole Men movie. Those are classics and have aged quite well. I can’t say that this one has.

Overall 3/10

White House Down Review

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It’s time to review a recent White House film and I’m not talking about Olympus Has Fallen this time! White House Down has more of a summer blockbuster feel while Olympus tried to take itself more seriously. I definitely preferred this one, but I’ll compare them both in a little bit. This film still had quite a few problems and suffered from the usual terrorists vs America issues, but was decently fun for the most part.

John has always wanted to be a part of the secret services and he’s about to get his chance! He brings his daughter along for the interview and things are going well. The problem is that…he failed the interview. Ah well, he tried. As John is about to leave, the White House is attacked and a traitor among them destroys all of the guards. A handful of other terrorists appear and take out the 50+ guards in the White House. John manages to escape along with the President, but how long can they hold out? Can these villains be stopped or will the heroes have to call for some backup?

Well, the plot’s fairly basic and these films have a bit of a formula to them so you know what to expect. Most of the usual events occur, but the film does try to shake things up a little by having the President get more of a role in the adventure like in Air Force One. The film is a little on the long side, but I wouldn’t say that it drags on as you’ll stay interested during the viewing for the most part.

All right, let’s quickly get the comparisons out of the way between this and Olympus. As I mentioned earlier, Olympus is supposed to be really serious business. The terrorists just want to watch the world burn and it can be pretty gritty as the lead knifed and gunned everyone down. The villains also intimidate and shoot the hostages for a little while which made for overdramatized scenes that were painfully long. The President got a scene where he was boxing in that film, but then didn’t get to throw a punch. This film is the opposite in many ways as it’s more light. There are several scenes for comic relief and the President gets a decent role. The best part is that we don’t have to waste time watching the terrorists mess with the hostages for the most part. It happens a bit of course, but it’s much better. This film was simply better for me on just about every level. The only area where the other film won was probably with the main character. He was a little more intense than John, but I liked both leads.

Back to the film. One of the good things about it was the soundtrack. We got several solid tunes to listen too during the attacks. They were certainly fast paced and helped to make the scenes a little more epic. A little on the generic side…sure, but they still did the job. That’s the important thing. I’d also say that the writing was much better than expected as there was virtually no language when compared to the standard, but this was a TV airing so make of that what you will. It’s possible that it was just edited out.

As I mentioned earlier, John’s a good lead. He wants to be a good father and he’s been working to make himself into a good person who can be dependable for his daughter. He certainly proved his stuff in this film and you can easily root for the guy. The President is also a solid character and I’m glad that he’s always ready for a fight. He gets quite a few big moments and even shoots a rocket at one point. That’s definitely not your average President material! There aren’t any other real notable characters as you have the garden variety terrorists at the ready and the supporting characters. I liked the general of the National Defense military group as he always kept a calm head about everything and I also liked the accent.

Now, let’s get into the main issue that makes the film a little dicey. The whole premise and plot only works on the assumption that the government security staff is inept and that America’s aim for each soldier is about as good as a storm trooper. As I stated earlier, the terrorists essentially entered with 20-1 odds or maybe even worse ones than that and not a single one of them was taken down during the attack. They seriously mowed everyone down without effort and it was embarassing to watch. Adding insult to injury is the fact that the hacker just had to type in 9 digits to immediately override the security of the White House and own everyone with it. He was very adept with the tech and suddenly knew how to operate everything.

There is a lot of plot hax in this film and it never really stops. Even near the end when the President rushes an old guy, I had to wince. The old man is able to overpower him and with a single punch, the President is out of commission for about 10 minutes. A single punch…just let that sink in a little. There’s no way that someone would lose that quickly when the stakes are so high. We do have the whole concept of adrenaline after all. I could list dozens and dozens of other such reasons, but let’s just talk about the big ones. There’s the fact that there is apparently no backup near the White House for some reason and none of the planes get anywhere near there until late into the film. That’s certainly…not very well thought out of our government eh? It’s also sad to see so many random civilians huddled around the White House as it makes things very tough for the army to do their job.

Our tanks were also not very impressive as a single rocket took one down since the tank naturally missed its target with the first shot and decided not to fire any more of them after that. America just did not look good and that’s unfortunately how it has to be if this plot is ever going to look impressive to the masses. It’s also unfortunate that we even have White House tours in real life, but that’s another matter entirely. The White House is mostly for show after all and especially nowadays as the President is always around on peace negotiations and other such things. Still, the concept of it just doesn’t work for me.

Beyond that…and that’s a big beyond, this was a good film. The plot was interesting as the President wanted to unveil a controversial peace treaty that would take all troops from the Middle East. That definitely sounds risky and I’m not sure if it’s a good move, but let’s save the politics chatter for a political site. The film’s attempts to keep things light with the comic relief were decent for the most part. I didn’t mind the antique guy who kept going on about the priceless artifacts. Him throwing one away at the end was a little much, but at least he was brave enough to stand up to the villains. I didn’t like John’s daughter though as she was overly rude to him the whole time and acted like the kid from Jurassic World. We’re definitely not getting good examples of kids in current films. Just look at Pixels and how the main characters were petty thieves in their younger days. Not cool.

Overall, White House Down fulfills its duty as an action blockbuster where the President gets to fight back. There is a lot of plot hax scattered throughout the film and America looks decently bad as expected. Luckily, it’s not to the extent of Olympus Has Fallen and this film was just more fun. It wouldn’t be my first pick, but I would recommend it to viewers. My advice is to just watch it as another action film and ignore the fact that the White House is being invaded. Imagine that it is just a fancy office building and everything will start to make a little more sense. I mean, the US not having any backups whatsoever to our missilles and nukes..? Please! Still, maybe it’s a good thing for foreign countries to believe this so in that sense….right on!

Overall 6/10