Suggested by Sonic Bumblebee isn’t often known as one of the most powerful robots out there but he can definitely dish out the damage when needed. He has the benefit of multiple super forms in Robots in Disguise which I would even say put him above Rodimus’ level for a bit there. Bumblebee was always faster so now that he can really lay on the damage, it would be hard for him to lose. Bumblebee wins.
Suggested by Sonic Smokescreen can smoke out his opponents using actual smoke or just a ton of ammo. The guy may not be known as one of the most offensive bots on the Autobot army but he’s actually got a very respectable amount of armaments. I don’t really see some other supporting characters taking him out but when you’re a top bot like Rodimus then you will be okay. He has the power of the Primes amping him up and has come a long way since his cadet days. He wins in most stats. Rodimus Prime wins.
Suggested by Sonic I don’t think we’ll ever forget Hot Rod saving Prime from Megatron’s sneak attack only for it to ultimately not be enough. His transformation into Rodimus definitely amped up his power even to the point where he could hold his own with a much stronger Galvatron but in general Megatron is much more powerful. He has better equipment on his end and superior firepower. Rodimus just can’t go pound for pound with this fighter. He will ultimately be vanquished. Megatron wins.
Suggested by Sonic Smokescreen is a fairly tough bot but he is definitely at a disadvantage here with how many forms and power ups Bumblebee has obtained over the years. The guy is a complete beast in combat with enough firepower to completely blow Smokescreen away. Bumblebee also has different visors that let him see through smoke. As a scout you could even say that he is a bit of a hard counter to Smokescreen. Bumblebee wins.
This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative
It’s time for a film based on a true story. I suppose films like that don’t have to worry about spoilers as presumably you already know about it, but I still think the title could have been a little different. It sort of spoils a massive part of the movie right out of the gate. You’re waiting for all of his teammates to be destroyed so that the main character is the sole survivor but the whole film is about the onslaught so he isn’t actually on his own until the end of the film. Moreover, the title also basically confirms that he survives. I know since this is based on a true story it’s likely that he would survive but not a guarantee since a lot of tragic stories also get adapted. All I’m saying here is the title’s just a bit on the odd side with how much it gives away.
Well, the basic plot here is that an army of soldiers are sent deep into enemy territory to take down one of the enemy leaders. They need to stealthily get in there and judge the situation. Unfortunately they are spotted by a few locals and after some deliberation, decide to let them go. Unfortunately these people let the Taliban know that the soldiers are in the area and they all start to get picked off. Can they survive long enough for backup to arrive or is it all over for them? That’s the general plot of the film at least.
Off the bat I do think it’s valid to think that the heroes made the wrong move in letting the witnesses go. It does make sense that they would go and let people know which would compromise the whole operation. Your only options at that point are to take them down, tie them up, or bring them with you. I understand not wanting to go the nuclear option but tieing them up should be the bare minimum. Alternately you take them with you as you take the high position on the mountain and you just let them go once you’ve established radio contact and gotten backup. Either way you are in a much better position. The problem with waiting is that you’re not on home turf so the enemy knows the location better than you do and you’re heavily outnumbered.
It’s probably no exaggeration to say that the enemy had 5-6 times the numbers that the heroes had because the soldiers took down a lot of enemy fighters and yet they just kept on coming. It felt like there was no real end to them no matter how much ammo the heroes had. Perhaps if they were on level ground they could have managed to overcome the odds but even then it’s tough because of how heavily armed the enemy was. They had RPGs and machine guns at the ready. The heroes had a lot of ammo and several guns but it’s just hard to fight like that. You’re basically going up against a mini army.
The only time the film isn’t focused on all this action is really the intro act where the heroes are getting ready to be deployed and they all have a little fun. It’s nice that we at least got to see them having a bit of fun before everything went south. There are also the brief meanwhiles to the army base but those are always brief. You do wonder how come the army doesn’t have better communication technology in this day and age though. Using satellites and such you’d expect them to be able to reach home base in any area. Not being able to make contact at all feels like it would ramp every mission’s difficulty up a whole lot. If you can’t call for backup or extraction you’re close to turning these into suicide missions.
The brass apparently knew from the start that there could be communication issues as well so it’s not like this is a big surprise or anything like that. It was expected which probably makes this even more tragic all the way around. If there was ever something that deserved a ton of funding, it’s definitely making improvements to that technology. It also feels very feasible so even though this film’s based on events that aren’t super old, I would imagine this would no longer be such a cause for concern in the present.
Overall, The Lone Survivor is definitely a very intense army film. Don’t expect a whole lot of happy scenes here or much cause for celebration during the adventure. The majority of its runtime is really about the heroes being brutally beaten and killed as they do their best to survive for as long as possible. The film doesn’t hold back on the violence at all or the desperation that the characters are feeling. If you’re curious about the real life events then it makes sense to check out this film but it also may just be easier to read an article on it instead. It’s not really my kind of title and just makes for a very dreary movie as you watch it through. Even the ending isn’t what I would call all the way happy because ultimately this came at a super high price.
This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative
Okay it’s time to look at a film that has a very interesting plot but unfortunately it is completely wasted by having a lot of screen time take place in the past and also getting lost in the grittiness of it all. This should have been a really fun action movie with a whole lot of excitement going on and instead it was all squandered. What a shame.
The film starts off with Connor dueling an immortal in a parking lot. There’s a lot of destruction but in the end Connor wins and absorbs the guy’s life essence. The cops arrest Connor but he gets out due to their being a lack of evidence. So what’s going on here? Well basically there are a bunch of immortals running around so there is finally a tournament to bump them all off. The only way for an immortal to die is to be destroyed (So they’re not really immortal tbh unless you’re just thinking lifespan and in a way that is what some people think of but to me you’re not truly an immortal unless you are unable to die) so everyone is going to fight until there is only one immortal left standing. The final battle appears to be fated to be Connor vs Kurgan as they have a deep history.
Okay so the first massive mistake the film makes is constantly jumping between the present and the past. In general as a rule of thumb you do not want to do this. If you absolutely have to do it though, try to get all of the scenes out of the way early so we can get on with it. Instead this just keeps on going over and over and over again right through to the end. You’re sick and tired of seeing the past each time. It also has to be one of the most generic immortal storylines you’ll see as everyone betrays the guy because it’s immortal.
I’m always impressed at just how awful humanity is in all of these moments. So you’ve decided to anger a guy who won’t die from normal injuries and just hope that he doesn’t slaughter everyone? They’re super lucky that he doesn’t want to hurt any of them because this was quickly turning into a villain origin story. Then Connor meets a lady and has a romance but of course he won’t grow old while she does so she ends up dying. The film has some extra grit by allowing the villain to get his hands on her while Connor isn’t around which is definitely the worst scene of the film.
It’s off screen fortunately but that really didn’t need to be in the film. We already have so many reasons to dislike Kurgan, this is just piling on at this point. Man I have so many problems with the flashback stuff. Ultimately it’s just not interesting and it’s beating down a point that you could have easily understood from context clues. The only scenes of real importance here is when Ramirez shows up to train Connor and even that could have been off screen. You knew Ramirez was doomed the whole time anyway. The mentor is always doomed in these things. At least he put up a really good fight though.
Ramirez was a decent guy and I give him credit for trying to show Connor the ropes. He really did make the guy a whole lot stronger and also informed him of everything going on. If not Connor would have been at a really disadvantage which is why the whole tournament’s not very fair anyway. If you don’t know someone to give you the info dump then you’re just going to get absolutely wasted when the fighting starts anyway since you won’t even be expecting to have to fight for your life until it’s too late. Not very balanced eh?
Connor is a reasonable main character but not great or anything. He’s all business when it comes to the fights and has experience being an immortal. So that’s all good but you do think he would be a little better at handling himself socially in that respect. For example when the cops showed up at the beginning Connor really didn’t even try to explain himself all that much. At least he could have come up with some kind of crazy story. He’s rich so he might have been able to get away with it a lot easier.
The main villain Kurgan is barely a character so much as he’s just someone that needs to be taken down. He’s pure evil and his only real motivation is to murder everyone. Not exactly a deep character. He’s a strong one to be sure but you’re just waiting for him to go down. I think the film could have made him more interesting and in general I wish we could have seen more of the combatants. For the most part they all just show up to get destroyed as quickly as possible.
Brenda is also a character who doesn’t do a whole lot considering how often she appears. She wants to find clues to Connor and how he got such an old sword. She even resorts to asking him out to trap him while she has her tape recorder on but he sees through the traps rather quickly. I suppose she does have one key moment where she saves him during the fight but that’s not really enough for her to turn the corner and be more interesting.
Highlander is the definition of a film that was way too ambitious and so you end up feeling like it left a ton of meat on the bone. I wanted to learn more about the immortals, see more of the action, and just enjoy the tournament. Instead we’re stuck learning about Connor’s past over and over again and the fights play a backseat role. The actual fights are really good when they occur but they absolutely should have been the main focus and it should not even have been close. When your main characters are all immortals you really can’t go wrong.
Overall, Highlander is a film with a lot of potential but it didn’t focus on the most interesting elements of the premise. It should have been more about the fun immortal fights and everything instead of zipping around in the past. We didn’t need to see all of that to be honest and the past scenes hurt the film tremendously. It tries too hard to be edgy instead of focusing on the fun fights and in the end it definitely did not meet expectations. I would say to just skip this one and watch a different action film like Mortal Kombat instead. Now that one really focuses on the tournament rather than on all of the side stuff and it makes for a better overall experience.
Overall 3/10
This is a review of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative
It’s time for another remake as we step into the circus this time around. I have to say that the original film defeats this one much like the Death on the Nile original beat the remake. Ultimately this one hangs around a bit too long and just doesn’t manage to surpass the original on anything except visuals. The visuals are really solid after all.
So the movie starts out with Stan on rather hard times and he ends up joining a circus. He does odd jobs around the place and helps with one of the magic tricks. Eventually Stan grows ambitious and figures he can use the trick of fake psychic powers to get huge. He leaves the circus with Molly and they set off to light the world ablaze. It’s all going very well and they have a lot of money now but Stan gets jealous. He wants to be even richer and so he decides to forego the morals and start spooking people with visions of their deceased loved ones and things like that. Molly is completely against the idea and so Stan goes to a local psychiatrist named Lilith. She agrees to help him scam people and will even do him the favor of holding all of his money for him in her vault. That’s real generous. What can go wrong?
I’m going to be honest this part’s a little on the nose. Her name is Lilith like the succubus of legend. She is gladly keeping all of Stan’s money for him since she doesn’t care about material gains and all the while she is recording sessions with Stan where she breaks down his psyche to learn of his dark past. Along the way she’s also seducing him since the guy has no ethics as we’ve already established. Any red flags here? Gee….I can’t even….
So yeah Stan has it all coming to him and you can’t feel bad for him. You could argue that he was never a particularly nice guy but he was in a seedy environment and had to be tough. You can certainly understand that and I wouldn’t hold it against him. The main problem is of course the betrayal once he turns from Molly into the arms of Lilith and also getting so greedy. If he didn’t try so hard the guy could have just stayed plenty wealthy and lived a peaceful life. Instead he just had to get bigger and bigger and bigger as the risk kept growing as well. When you turn your backs on everyone for money that is always going to lead you down the wrong path.
Molly was a good heroine at least, she really tried to keep Stan on the straight and narrow. The thing is, at the end of the day you can’t really control someone else so either they want to do the right thing or they don’t. If they don’t then your hands are really tied the whole time. There’s just not much that you could really do about it. Ultimately she does eventually draw the line although it would have been great if she had left a little sooner and decided not to dress up at all.
Lilith is a pretty solid villain and probably the highlight character of the film. Yes she’s not a good person to say the least but I appreciated her cunning. A large portion of the film is Stan just messing with everyone and showing why he is the smartest guy in the room. Lilith was the first one to challenge that and so they have a meeting of the minds several times. It’s by far the most interesting part of the movie. You really feel like he’s on the back foot the whole time despite his bravado and how tough the guy thinks he is. He’s just not on the same playing field as her and it really shows.
Where the film really falters are all the scenes with the circus. It feels like the film doesn’t really get going until he’s out of the circus and into the city, yet that takes a very long time. A good chunk of the film is to set that up and all of those scenes are rather brutal. We see how Stan’s natural charm carries him far but the whole place is rather dreary and gritty. We also get the scene of eating a chicken which is pretty brutal. Obviously most of its not on screen but it’s set up enough where it’s still pretty bad. You definitely don’t want animal violence like that in any form.
The film’s ending is also leading up to this once again. Now I do think the ending is better than the original. This one leaves you some hope for some kind of master plan or a way for Stan to get out of this. Not that you’re really rooting for Stan by this point but you’re at least hoping that he avoids this fate because you wouldn’t really want that to happen to anyone. It’s a rough way to go and the laugh at the end could mean a few different things. I’d say it’s clear which way the film wants you to interpret it, as complete despair and acceptance but you could still maintain that maybe there is some grand master plan coming into play. After all Stan already knows the playbook to this so hopefully he wouldn’t be fooled so easily.
Overall, Nightmare Alley definitely shows you a circus that would give you nightmares. It can’t be easy having to live in such an environment and most of the people there are hardly around by choice. It’s a place of last resort but that doesn’t really make for an interesting film. Once we’re outside that and into the big city then the film picks up but not enough to overcome the intro. I appreciated the strategic element of the film and wish we had stayed to that more but ultimately this is not a film I would really recommend. I would much sooner say to check out the original instead.
Overall 3/10
It’s time for another Nintendo Switch Online title. This time we’re into the classic Pilotwings adventure and I remember this one vaguely from back in the day. It’s fairly fun although there isn’t a ton of content here so I feel like you wouldn’t be thrilled if you bought this at opening day. In the span of around 2 hours I completed most of the content and I was still getting used to the controls. Still if you’ve got the subscription you may as well give it a go since it’s free.
There are 3 main control schemes in this game and each one has 4 levels. You can play with the hang glider and the idea is to pass through a bunch of rings to score points. Once you have passed them all then you have to head to the landing zone. Landing is the most difficult with this one because the wind will shift your glider all over the place and it can be really hard to steady yourself. You have to basically ride with the wind and then plan your landing accordingly. You can see how this would be the trickiest one because you have a lot to consider here. I definitely had a really hard time trying to get past the latter levels with this one.
Then you have my favorite control method, the personal jetpack. This is the only mode out of the 3 where I was able to complete every level. Basically you fly around and land on objects or go through rings and then land. The fun part is that you don’t need to worry about the wind here because your jetpack is stronger than the wind. Do you know what this means?? You hold all the power! It makes this more of a conventional platformer type which is really fun and it’s still one of the more in depth jetpack gameplays that I’ve seen.
Finally you have the long plane where it’s sort of a mix of the two. It’s too heavy for the wind to mess with it too much but when you turn you will feel how the wind tries to slow you down. You have a little rocket launcher which you can use to destroy targets before you head off for the landing. The landing zone is a bit less obvious than the other two though so I never quite understood it. It looks like a full airplane landing strip so I’d aim for the middle but I always lost a lot of points. Maybe I had to go for the end? Either way I would get enough points to win the level but it had me confused.
To unlock the next level you would have to get a certain amount of points. Typically they would ask you to get 70 out of 100. Your score is based on how quickly you complete the level, how many times you bumped into things, and any bonus objectives you completed. 70 isn’t very hard as long as you have a good landing so that’s really key. If you fumble the landing then you have just fumbled your score as well. Trust me you don’t want to let that happen.
The graphics aren’t particularly good for the character models here but I do really love the backgrounds and everything. It’s got a lot of energy all the way around so it does look good as a whole. I wonder if the character models were intentionally sandwiched the way that they were. It’s definitely possible since they look so out of place. The soundtrack is fun enough too. It matches with the overall bright aesthetic.
Overall, Pilotwings is a pretty good game. I didn’t really care for the glider gameplay which is ironic since that’s usually the selling point here but the other two modes were definitely good. You really get to test your balance here that’s for sure. Ultimately there just isn’t a whole lot of content so you will likely be done with this game quickly but the important thing is that you will have a good time while you’re playing it. Definitely worth giving a look.
Overall 6/10
I now have the Platinum trophy for this game! Definitely a quick turnaround but I guess that’s it for this game now. Once you have the platinum there isn’t much reason to go back to it.
It’s time to look at a film that really overstays its welcome. It’s long enough where it keeps bringing up more and more plot points only to completely drop them when it counts. It felt like this movie didn’t have a lot of focus and we have yet another main character who has less strength of character than the foldable chairs you find at the dollar store. This film isn’t it I’m afraid.
The movie starts with introducing us to Lucas who is aspiring to be an amazing doctor. He wants to show the world what a true medical professional is and he believes in the practice. His fellow students are more concerned with how big their cars will be and don’t have the same drive. Unfortunately this makes Lucas rather arrogant. He figures that he can never make a mistake and is always blowing up at everyone. He also runs out of money when his father steals all of it so Lucas comes up with a crazy plan to marry a nurse who fell in love with him. He doesn’t actually love her but he loves the fact that she has some money saved up so he gets together with her so he can use it all up. This launches him into the career of being a doctor but at what cost?
Well not much it turns out because the film barely pays any attention to the fact that he just took her money through deception like this. It’s not really brought up again until the very end of the film and that has to be swept aside when he has his sad moment. The main problem with Lucas is that he’s basically a jerk for the whole movie and never really gets much in the way of consequences from it. Lets start off with the main instance of this here which is marrying Kris for her money.
The film doesn’t actually give this a lot of screentime when it’s a huge deal. Her family doesn’t find out about it or anything and he never has a moment where he thinks about what a rotten thing he did. Nah he just keeps about his business. He never apologizes or anything and that’s absolutely major. It just makes him completely unlikable from the jump. Then throughout the film he doesn’t treat her well as he blows up at her several times. A really bad look no matter how you slice it. He also blows up at his friend Alfred on many occasions.
Each time Alfred’s the one who is the bigger man and just takes it or says they can let it go. Lucas actually uses violence in slamming him into a mirror at one point and later on humiliates him in front of the whole medical staff. Every time Lucas basically gets away scot free without learning a lesson. I think that’s the biggest problem here which is that he never learns a lesson. Usually the main character will reflect and see how what he did was wrong but that never happens here at any point during the adventure. That is probably the most critical out of all the issues.
Then of course we have the part where he ends up having an affair and cheating on his wife. Yet another strike for a character who passed the 3 strikes a long time ago. It’s a really bad look all around and yet another element that he doesn’t get slammed for enough. That’s a real dealbreaker no matter how you slice it. So having someone like this as the main character just doesn’t work. He drags the whole film down the whole time.
You just feel bad for Kris who basically got blinded by love to the point where she was tricked like this. She ended up wasting the best years of her life when maybe she could have ended up finding someone who actually did care about her instead of being used like this instead. She had a whole lot of possibilities in her life and they all got wasted instead. Definitely a shame all around. I wouldn’t say Alfred was a great character or anything but he could have had a better friend as well.
The only part of the film that’s rather solid is how the small town is treated. The big city guys are skeptical about how a doctor could really operate there and how it would all be very backwards and outdated but the local doctor actually runs a fairly tight ship and it’s all pretty sound. All except for the head of the hospital who is unfortunately completely out of his depth and sabotaging everything. It’s a shame when the lazy part is at the top since they can’t be stopped so easily but still for the most part this is how a small town should be portrayed. Everyone was just doing their best to help each other out at any time of the day. The film could have decided to go down the wholesome route and maybe have Lucas finally notice Kris at this point instead of just doubling down on his character.
It’s why I say the film was too long and opened more doors than it could close. Lucas’ father’s plot had to just be taken care of off screen because there was no time for it. We never got to see Lucas reflecting on anything, Kris never got to talk to her family about what was going on, the old surgeon is still using the wrong technique in every operation, etc. I say they should have cut out about an hour, have Lucas head to the small town early on and then make the film more about the character development he goes through there. Obviously you cut out the cheating plot as well and then we’re in business.
Overall, The film had a chance at least to end on a reasonably sad note with the main guy just walking down a cold path on his own. That would have worked out really well but the final moments instead are a little too happy for him. You can make the case that it’s just a moment of quick compassion for someone who’s been through a rough patch and that’s probably true but it doesn’t change anything. So he’s still out of there and that makes the most sense to me. In the end it’s just a bit of a dreary film though because at no point are the characters truly happy. The whole relationship is built upon a lie and at no point does Lucas even feel guilty about it. You could do far better than this film in looking for a solid retro title.
Overall 3/10
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