Wander Darkly Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Wander Darkly is one of those films that’s sorta part mystery to an extent as you try to find out exactly what was going on here but also much a drama film. The main two have to try and get past their differences to save their marriage before it’s too late. Unfortunately the movie stumbles out of the gate and keeps jumping from memory to memory without enough interesting elements to keep your attention.

The film starts with Adrienne and Matteo fighting as always. They went to a party and Matteo felt like Adrienne was flirting with one of the guys there while she thinks he’s being overly jealous. Well, they end up getting into a car crash and Adrienne dies. She then wakes up as a ghost that is doomed to travel across the cosmos on her own now. The worst part is she learns that Matteo ends up abandoning their kid and running off. So she goes back to the moment where she died and tries to talk things out with him. Matteo says she isn’t dead since they’re talking and all but Adrienne refuses to see anybody because doesn’t think it’s worth it since she’s absolutely positive that she’s dead. So they take this time to talk things out.

The majority of the film is the big talk between the two of them as they relive all of the major events of their lives. The film’s using a stylistic approach here as they aren’t literally transported back in time but are sort of doing image training like in DBZ. As a result that means that the supporting characters can also change the script up and talk according to their feelings. It’s an interesting approach so I’ll give the film some props there. They hop back and forth between the past and future a whole lot but of course the future is a possible one, not necessarily the real one.

The biggest issue with the film for me is how unlikable both of the main characters are. They were complaining a whole lot right from the instant the movie starts. Mainly you see this a lot from Adrienne initially as Matteo can’t do anything right in her eyes and he keeps getting slammed the whole time. Any suggestion is shot down and she pretty much says that they can’t have any fun no matter what he says.

So you figure she is probably bitter about something and as we look through the memories it’s a lot of somethings. Well, Matteo doesn’t think he’s done anything wrong, he’s just got a tough job to do and all that. Well…unfortunately we see that he did cheat on her in one of the memories. Sure it was “Just for an instant” and he snapped out of it but the damage was certainly done and it validated all of her fears. Matteo didn’t have to put himself in such a dangerous situation where that would happen so it’s all on him.

Now all of his scenes where he kept thinking she might be cheating on him loses a lot of its punch. For Adrienne we see that she didn’t get to cheat on him, however she basically admits to wanting to do so. Not a good look for her either and so both characters just look really bad. It would have been nice if their trip down memory lane had actually shown that both of them were innocent as it would have been a very wholesome way to end things. Instead they both look even worse than when the film had even started which is a shame.

Of course the romance here is very weak as a result. There’s just no way to root for any of the characters. Especially with how obviously that one girl was flirting with Matteo and how Adrienne was fine letting that guy flirt with her. Once you’ve made a choice then you’ve got to stick to it. Either you decide to live your whole life alone and just deal with it or you get a partner but there are no second choices there.

Given that this was the entire movie, it ended up failing entirely for me. The writing wasn’t very good and the story just wasn’t interesting. It’s just a ton of bickering until they re fall in love with each other through the memories but given what they have seen it’s hard to really get past that. The switching between memories and the real world is an interesting idea but it’s done so rapidly and constant that it ends up overstaying its welcome early on. You can probably guess where the ending is going eventually as the film goes on but I wouldn’t say it works very well.

It’s not a bad ending by any means but you’re pretty much checked out by this point. It would have needed a much bolder ending to really reel you back in. There’s a lot of ways you could do this from the ghost angle or maybe you could even do some time travel for an actual redo. It would have probably been a little too late though. The movie takes itself so seriously and also could have used some humor or something. For the most part the whole thing is just a lot of doom and gloom. Even the happy scenes are tarnished by the fact that you know it doesn’t end well. Also the twist does put into question how she could have seen the possible future but with the multiverse theory I suppose there’s a few ways you could swing that.

Overall, Wander Darkly is a movie that you will want to absolutely skip at all costs. It’s just not a good movie and I would struggle to find any good parts about it. At the end of the day there is no way to pull off a romantic drama if the two main characters aren’t likable. It’s just not happening and a potential remake would absolutely have to find some way to address that or it’ll be doomed from the start. It’s time to wander away from this one.

Overall 1/10

Dolls Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Dolls is one of those films where you figure the main characters are going to be doomed but the question is…how doomed? Will they be able to put up a fight or are they doomed right out of the gate? In the end I wouldn’t say the Dolls are the strongest horror villains as the humans can put up a fight but it’s fair to say that they’re still a solid threat. This is a horror film that’s mostly going through the motions, I wouldn’t recommend it but the novelty of evil dolls is always intense.

The movie starts off with one of the meanest families getting stranded as their car goes in the mud. You have the stepmother Rosemary who can’t stand her husband’s daughter Judy and makes no secret of this. Rosemary wants to send her off to boarding school and insists on being mean for no reason. Then you have David who is so desperate for Rosemary’s attention and devotion that he will basically grovel and will take her side against Judy’s every time. Finally you have Judy who has dreams of the parents getting eaten alive by her teddy bear. So these 3 have a whole lot of issues but at least they have a place to sleep now.

See, there’s an abandoned mansion owned by a senior couple named Gabriel and Hilary. They don’t mind having company for the night. The family is soon joined by the two hitchhikers they nearly destroyed while driving to the mud patch as well as a guy named Ralph who is being manipulated by those two. Ralph seems like the only decent adult here so will he be able to escape the wrath of the dolls or is it too late? One thing’s for sure, nobody is going to be having a very peaceful night here.

Now you may be wondering…how can you lose to a bunch of toys? Well, in some cases it’s really the surprise factor. When the toys have already stabbed you before you’ve begun to fight then it’s difficult to do much. For example I wouldn’t say Rosemary had much of a fighting chance from the jump. As the meanest character in the film you figured that the movie was definitely going to cook something up for her. Being mean pretty much never pays in a horror film. Often times nice characters will die too but they tend to get off a little easier at least.

Then for Isabel and Enid, they’re petty thieves who don’t mind stealing from old people so of course things aren’t going to go well for them. Isabel’s death goes more into the surprise factor but Enid plays this one quite horribly. Okay so you’re outnumbered by the toys but you do have a flaming weapon plus you’ve had time to adapt which is more than most of the other characters got. So now you can plan a proper counter attack and start taking these guys down right?

Well, she unfortunately forgets the basic rule of combat which is that if someone is pointing a gun at you then you need to get out of range. She already knows that the toys are real so why stay in front of them like this? I thought the scene was a bit annoying because she had already taken down so many of them, only to freeze up at the absolute worst time. That was not the way to go about things, not at all. Big mistake on her part and it cost everything.

As the only real decent character here, Ralph’s a solid guy to root for. He has to deal with a whole lot and he’s a bit too naïve at times but at least he means well. Ralph does his best to protect Judy and while he is really slow on the uptake, it all eventually makes sense to him. I did think a scene near the end wasn’t handled well though as it comes across almost as if Ralph was trying to instigate the villains to attack him. Just go away while you’ve still got your life in tact. Why are you trying to make this into a bigger deal? I thought that was nearly a big miss for him so he got lucky…in that scene at least.

As for Judy, well you can cut her a lot of slack next to the other characters because she is still a kid. I’d say that has to count for something after all and she does try to talk to the toys a little. She did well in evading her father as well since that nearly got tricky for her. She does apparently lie a lot which is part of what makes this situation tougher for anyone to believe her so I like to think that her lying days are over now.

As for Gabriel and Hilary, I thought they were fairly interesting. They’ve certainly got grand ambitions but I wouldn’t say they are perfect ones. For example, if you’re trying to go the sympathetic route with them then shouldn’t they have more control over what the dolls do? They nearly bumped someone off who wouldn’t have been on their hit list all because the dolls have such a mind of their own.

By the end of the film it’s left fairly vague on exactly how this works. I assume the toys are on semi automatic where they work to accomplish the old couple’s goals but have some personality and control over themselves. If that is the case, I’d say that Gabriel and Hilary need to tighten the reigns just a bit or it’s going to go against their goals in the end. It sort of defeats the purpose if they’ll just destroy anyone who goes into the house. It’s an interesting dynamic though so it could be interesting to learn more about the villains some day.

At the end of the day what holds this film back is what holds most horror films back. It can be quite violent. Most of the deaths are definitely trying to be as gruesome and painful as possible. These dolls are absolutely not the kind of villains to give you an easy death. In part this is because of the size but expect to be shot and stabbed numerous times before going down. Each death takes forever and the way one of the girls dies is particularly gruesome as it’s like she is early on in the process of being a toy and so it all looks off with the eyes and everything.

Overall, Dolls is not really anything special in the slasher/horror genre. I dare say the dream near the beginning should have been real as it would have been such a crazy start to the adventure and would have switched things up. Realistically it wouldn’t have helped the score all that much though. I did appreciate the twist ending as it reminds you that some cycles are not too easy to break or stop. Things will just keep on happening over and over again. If this is your kind of film then you may as well jump on it but otherwise you can probably guess whether you’ll like the film or not right from the poster.

Overall 2/10

The Bedford Incident Review

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We’ve definitely got a real fun film with this one. When you’ve got all of the characters stuck on a boat for the duration of the film you definitely have to have good writing and a solid plot in order to keep things going. Fortunately this movie pulls that off without a hitch and so you’ll be having a good time here from start to finish.

The movie starts with Ben and Chester being brought to a navy ship to work under a rather controversial captain known as Eric. Eric’s fairly good at his job but the issue is that he tends to be rather obsessive. He can go too far in his duties to protect the ship and as a result he has not gotten a promotion despite having all kinds of medals and accomplishments. Ben is a reporter and so naturally he is curious about this while Chester is just trying to do his best as the ship doctor. Both of them don’t yet realize that this post will be tougher than they expect.

Right off the gate I do like how this film handles itself in terms of making the ship adventure fun. The limited amount of backgrounds and scenery are hidden by all the different camera angles and dynamic action taking place. You don’t have much time to feel like the characters are constrained because there is always something going on. There is never a chance to be bored or feel like the plot has slowed down.

I would say a lot of the credit to that goes to the Captain. Eric is a perfect antagonist, he’s not a villain or anything as he tries to do his job but antagonist is his role as the guy keeps getting in the way of the two main characters. He’s very set in his ways and is resistant to change. The guy gets extremely defensive for any kind of questions and really wants to be acknowledged as the master of the boat. All decisions go through him and that’s final. He pushes his men to the breaking point and resists all of Chester’s ideas for health and safety.

Eric seems to believe that any kind of healthy eating regime or exercise program would weaken his troops. That it would take their focus off of the mission and so he doesn’t support this. He wants them all to live and breathe the mission. After many years at sea with the crew, it’s fair to say that Eric has drilled this mentality into most of them. He’s borderline crazy but I just like the intensity that he brings to every scene. Eric knows that he’s right and everyone else is wrong. He never loses that mindset.

Meanwhile Ben does really well in his role as reporter. He starts things off by being amiable and working with Eric but as the captain starts to show him some disrespect, Ben quickly responds in kind. It’s clear that he’s not someone who will just let himself be pushed around. When he finally does get his big interview with Eric, Ben is quite direct with his questions. He knows that Eric has certain viewpoints on the government’s handling of the situation and works on backing him into a corner in order to get the guy to confirm this.

At the end Ben also stays in control much longer than the rest of the characters. Then you’ve got Chester who seems by all accounts to be a good doctor. He has some baggage in his past but there’s no indication that he has gotten worse at his job or is slacking off. His ideas are good but Eric completely ignores all of them. There just isn’t much Chester can do at that point since he has to go through the captain. He also ends up backing down when confronted which really sealed his chances of winning there. The only shot for him to have earned Eric’s respect would have been to stand his ground since the captain values toughness above all. It just wasn’t to be though.

The character roster is fairly small as these 3 are the main characters by far but then you’ve got two other supporting characters. First is Ensign who is a new recruit that means well but Eric is always really tough on him. Eric’s co-captain/friend tries to get the guy to lay off of him but it doesn’t work. Ultimately Ensign doesn’t let it get to him or at least tries to keep a tough front in spite of it. Then you have Wolfgang who is sort of an expert at giving us a view into what the enemy might be thinking.

That’s his role at least but I have major doubts on how good he is at it. I didn’t really think he helped a whole lot but at least he tried to tell Eric to back off. He was instigating the captain for most of the film though so I’d say it was too little too late by that point. Better late than never though.

The ending to this movie is really great though. For a little while you’re wondering if the film would actually go through with such a bold way of ending things but it does and I’d say that was a good thing. It may not be the happiest ending around but it does make the most sense based on how things were progressing. There was a lot of foreshadowing and given how Eric treats his men and the ship, it was all leading to this. Whether it happened now or later on, it was only a matter of time for an ending like this to take effect.

I’d say the film really reminds you of what a tough job it is to be in the navy as well. Either you’re a rank and file soldier who just has to keep following orders even if it sounds crazy or you’re a general that is still limited by the orders from above. The main difference is that you do have some power though and have to take responsibility for the result. No matter how you slice it, it’s just tough and you don’t exactly get a whole lot of time off here. These guys were stuck in the sea for long periods of time.

Overall, The Bedford Incident is a strong film that is carried by quality characters and really good writing. You’ll be very engaged the whole time because the movie is just really well made. You’re always at the edge of your seat wondering if Eric is right in pursuing a foreign ship so hard or if he really is crazy and taking everyone to their doom. Hindsight will be very powerful in this situation but what you do in the moment is most critical. I’d definitely recommend this flim to anyone that wants to watch a film about a lot of characters in a tense situation with no way out.

Overall 7/10

No Way Out Review

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Time for a film from a very long time ago. The title No Way Out has apparently been used quite a few times before and I can see why since it’s one of those titles where you can do a lot with it. I can see a bunch of them being literal but in this case I’d say it’s being more metaphorical like there’s no way out of the system.

The film starts by introducing us to Dr. Luther who has been gradually rising up the ranks in the medical profession. He technically has enough experience to be a doctor on his own by now but wants to stay under his mentor Dan for a while more. In part it’s because he still lacks confidence but it’s also in part because he has doubts that people will actually accept him. Discrimination was quite large there and Luther had to deal with it every day. His boss Dan helped to shield him from this to an extent but going off on his own could be difficult.

Well, his stay won’t be easy either as two criminals are brought in after getting shot. Luther tries to save one of them but the operation doesn’t go well and he ends up dying. The guy’s brother Ray believes that Luther did this on purpose and now has made it his life’s mission to destroy Luther. He’ll use every resource at his disposal from other family members to the entire gang at large. Luther will have to be very careful now as doom is around every corner.

A lot of the film is really about Luther trying to convince Ray that he didn’t murder the guy and the operation was correct. Unfortunately his boss Dan isn’t even fully convinced that the operation was needed which shakes Luther. For the record, Dan does still defend Luther and has his back the whole time but Luther wants to be sure even if it starts to put a strain on all of his relationships and even puts him in more danger. He even takes a gamble on being arrested to get the test to be done.

He’s definitely a solid lead who really wants to be a great doctor. I think this is a cautionary tale on why you sometimes have to know when to stop in trying to seek validation. As long as you know you did the right thing then you don’t need to worry about what the crazy bad guy is saying. Luther keeps his cool for the most part but that random moment where he went crazy at night and even turned on Dan was a bit much. Dan was in his corner for the duration of the movie without ever looking back.

Dan took no small risk in defending Luther at every opportunity. Whether it was behind closed doors in talking with his boss or at the front lines with the patients, Dan was always doing his best to help Luther out. He was just a great guy so that was the only scene that hurt Luther a bit. Not enough to stop him from being a good character or anything but it was disappointing.

As for the villain Ray, well he’s introduced as being an awful character right from the jump. His entire gimmick is that he’s super racist all the time and so from the start you’re not sure if he actually believes any of what he’s saying about Luther. Personally I think he’s just crazy enough where he might but of course that’s not really any kind of consolation. It just means that he is super delusional but as one of the big characters that unfortunately means he is going to be around a lot.

It’s mainly due to Ray that the ending isn’t very satisfying at all. I get the idea behind it and all but to me it’s just over the edge where I wouldn’t be trying all that hard to help out. I don’t think you have to finish the villain off or anything but you don’t have to do much of anything to help out either. It’s an admirable move by Luther so I don’t fault him for it but I would have handled the ending way differently.

There’s a bit of a subplot with Edie who gets roped into this and gets tricked by Ray into visiting the old gang and getting stuck there. I didn’t see much of a point to her character because ultimately she is not able to help Luther out by convincing Ray to let them dissect the body, nor is she able to do anything in stopping the gang. So it felt like there was no real contribution that she was able to make to the plot. She was sort of just around and I guess at least by the end she seemed to finally be free of the gang once and for all.

This is one film where the whole climax only happens because everyone suddenly forgets how to deal with prisoners though. So keep in mind that the cops are watching over a guy with serious gang ties who was in a shootout and has made it very clear that he wants to destroy Luther. The cop has himself handcuffed to the prisoner…why? It’s way more efficient to tie up both of the guy’s arms with the handcuffs. I don’t care that his leg wasn’t feeling so good, just cuff him normally. Well, the cop allows Ray to call in a friend and then stays behind as everyone else leaves the room. Now you just have the one guard with Ray and this “friend.”

Naturally the guard gets bumped off and Ray escapes but the whole situation felt incredibly contrived. Cmon now, you can’t convince me that the police would be this naive here. I was shaking my head as this all went down because it made no sense. Maybe you could try to convince me that this could happen if he was a nonviolent criminal or something but he was arrested as a fairly dangerous target from the jump. There should have been way more precautions.

One thing I did like though was how for once everyone didn’t just wait until the mob showed up to take everyone down. Instead the mob was jumped as the neighborhood they had been terrorizing for so long decided to get together and get the jump on them. I thought that was a nice change of pace because I was really not expecting that. It was great to see in part because of how unexpected it was but also because you have to defend yourself. At this point it was clear that the cops weren’t going to make it in time and nobody else was going to help so they had to make a move.

Overall, No Way Out is a very tense film to be sure. It does a good job of always maintaining that dangerous atmosphere where you don’t know how Luther’s going to get out of this one in one piece. The writing can also be solid but at the end of the day Ray is really annoying as the villain. The plot with Edie was also a big waste. She was around the gangsters before so she should have known better than to get involved again. There were so many ways to get around the situation or to handle it better and I’m skeptical that she would have gotten herself into so much trouble like this. Throw in the moment with Ray getting free and there were just too many moments like that. Ultimately I wouldn’t say the film is strong enough to hold its own with a lot of the classic titles and it’s not all that fun for a lot of its run. Without a satisfying ending to cap things off, I wouldn’t recommend this title.

Overall 4/10

Secret Reverse Review

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It’s always fun to see a manga creator make a story with the superheroes. This one’s sorta a manga but sorta a comic so I had to choose carefully what category to put it in. Ultimately I went with a comic since it does read left to right and it’s all in color. It’s a pretty fun story with a good amount of action and the artwork is naturally very high quality. Ultimately there’s a lot to like here and it would be cool if we could get a sequel or more stories in this continuity.

The story starts with Ironman heading to a big video game convention. It’s not really his thing as he prefers tech expos but he was invited and a big deal is that Kaioh has something which will change the industry forever. It’s an invention similar to Duel Monsters which makes solidified holograms with unlimited potential. Ironman is intrigued but unfortunately something has caused Kaioh to go crazy with power. Ironman will have to team up with the spectacular Spiderman in order to stop him. But is there someone pulling the strings behind Kaioh?

It’s fortunate that Spiderman was around to help because this probably would have been difficult for any one hero. Kaioh’s tech has a lot of versatility to it but for the most part he uses it like Doc Ock. He has the tendrils behind him to back him up during the fight and since they’re hologram based they can keep on changing. It makes for some really flashy battles and if this was a long running series instead of a oneshot, I suspect we would have seen a lot more monsters summoned.

Kaioh cracks pretty quickly so I wouldn’t say that I was a fan of the guy at all. He has no great ambitions and is pretty shortsighted with how he’s thinking about things. He has a cool design and is really smart but at the end of the day he lacks strength of will. The name is a nice homage to Kaiba but he lacks that guy’s cool points. If this had been allowed to be a true crossover and Kaiba was around I suppose they would have had to drastically change the plot.

Spiderman looks good here as he’s an experienced pro who gets the job done. The author does a good job of giving both Peter Parker and Spider-Man their due respect here. He’s not quite in the adult phase yet but you can tell that he’s no beginner. He gets his share of good quips and moments as well in there. Then you have Ironman who’s more of the main character here and he looks really good.

As Tony Stark he did well in bearing with the pain to hold onto the card for a full minute. That was impressive and he was able to stay in control so he didn’t attack any innocent civilians with his blast. Then as Ironman he quickly gets the job done with his attacks. This was a solid pair to choose for the two superheroes without a doubt. There are also some original characters here like Kaioh’s daughter but there isn’t really a lot of time for that. She was brave in getting the heroes to arrive and trying to talk him down though.

Then you have the actual alien and I thought the design here was really good. As for the being’s overall plans, it probably could have handled things a bit better. Shouldn’t you keep the tech on the downlow until you have everything in place? Showing it off at an expo just seems like you’re courting disaster here. That was his biggest undoing so I guess overconfidence got him in the end.

This is a oneshot so there’s no big cliffhanger or anything like that but that could have been a fun way to end things. Have different stories with each hero fighting more of these creatures which would eventually tie into some kind of big event. Or maybe you could do the reverse next time and have some Yugioh characters going up against a Marvel villain. That may even be a more interesting turn of events although it’ll be difficult to pick a villain strong enough to give those duelists a run for their money.

The art was really good as I mentioned earlier so the whole adventure really ends in the blink of an eye. It’s why we need more superhero stories like this with a manga touch to them. There are countless heroes and villains to choose from and all kinds of fun adventures to put them in. Hopefully this one ended up doing really well so we can get more of them.

Overall, Secret Reverse is a fun story. It’s a very direct superhero story with two heroes taking down the villain. Feels like a classic Marvel Team Up issue. Whether you’re a fan of the comics or just want to see an alternate reality of Yugioh in a way, then this is the title to check out. I do think Yami Yugi would make for a really solid hero if he was ever transported to Marvel/DC. There are tons of ways he could use his monsters for justice.

Overall 7/10

Omega Glendios vs Zordon

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Suggested by Sonic Zordon isn’t really much of a fighter. The guy can get in some good blows if he absolutely has to but Omega Glendios is in a completely different league. He can throw off some energy hits or even just a normal punch and Zordon isn’t getting back up. This guy’s a grade 3 and that level of ability is way beyond anything that Zordon has dealt with before. No amount of tactics will be enough to compensate for that. Omega Glendios wins.

Misogi Kumagawa vs Luminary

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Suggested by Sonic Misogi is a powerful fighter and someone who can basically nullify death. How can you possibly fight off someone with that level of ability? Luminary has a lot of elemental spells which he can use to fight Misogi from long range but he doesn’t have the physical abilities needed to stay on top here. Misogi will catch him and then that will be game over. There is just no escape from this guy. Misogi Kumagawa wins.

Aoshi vs Jinei

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Suggested by Sonic Jinei actually put up a pretty good fight against Kenshin. I always thought he was a rather solid first boss but ultimately that doesn’t mean that he will be ready to take down someone like Aoshi. Aoshi was a really powerful rival and someone who just wins in pretty much all categories from technique to raw power. Aoshi wins.

Shelly vs Inkay

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Suggested by Sonic Shelly’s ice arrows are pretty strong and she is a solid archer but that won’t be enough to stop Inkay quite yet. Inkay’s got a lot of ink moves and has an evolution mode in his Malamar form. He should be fast enough to dodge her attacks and land some quality hits. I don’t believe Shelly is quite fast enough to dodge the attacks for long or powerful enough to win in an instant. Inkay wins.

Demigra vs Jirachi

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Suggested by Sonic Jirachi may have the power of wishes on his side but that’s not going to be enough to stop a powerful demon like Demigra. Demigra’s powers are on a completely different level and his energy attacks could beat Jirachi in a single move. It’ll be difficult for the Pokemon to be able to keep up at all before being blown away. Demigra wins.