The Expendables 2 Review

This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Expendables 2 definitely does a good job of taking all the good things from Expendables 1 and then moving that over to the next level. I’d say it’s the better film in just about every area which is really impressive right out of the jump. It’s not every day that you find a film which can do this. The movie is long so everyone has their chance to do something and you won’t have any big complaints by the end.

The movie starts with Barney and the gang pulling off yet another mission with the greatest of ease. These guys are a tough unit to beat after all. Especially now that Gunner’s back with the group and not going crazy. They even have a new member in Billy who has proven to be useful. Billy wants out though and says that the next mission will be his last. He’s not wrong and gets murdered by the new villains on the block. Church effectively forced Barney into this mission so the guy’s upset but he also just wants to avenge Billy no matter what anyone says.

The only lead is the researcher they rescued during this mission, Maggie. She explains that the villains have a box containing a computer with the locations of a bunch of Plutonium. The heroes are going to have to try and find a way to get one step ahead of these guys and then take the win. They’re outnumbered and outgunned, but never out fought so Barney and the gang are ready to win. Can they pull this off?

In the last movie it’s fair to call it the Barney and Christmas show since the rest of the team really didn’t do much of anything until the end. Well, this film makes sure to change that so it feels like a group effort right from the jump. I think that was a good idea because even though I’m a big fan of the main two, I can see how it would be disappointing if you were waiting for the others. The only exception to this is Yin who leaves the team early on and never returns.

The first big improvement here is that Church and Trench actually get onto the front lines here. After all their tough talk, it’s good to see them back it up. If you had any doubts before, you don’t need to have them now because both characters are absolutely locked and loaded here. They aren’t holding back and have a lot of great banter between them. Using each others catchphrases was a fun little thing to do and they really mow down a ton of enemies. One scene even involves dropping a gun under the car they’re driving so the other guy can pick it up. Certainly not something that’s easy to do.

Expendables 2 is very much a film where everyone gets their hype and that works out well. As always Barney makes for a very solid main character as well. He doesn’t back down to anyone and just keeps on fighting. I feel like there was even a Rocky reference with the punch combo he landed on the villain. It was probably the most impressive exchange he had in the whole film. The final fight also lives up to the hype of being the last battle and it’s why you always want to have a strong enemy to go up against.

Lee does well in his role too and takes on the other big villain here. He’s still the best guy Barney’s got on the squad and someone he can always count on. I like his confidence and I dare say Lee has more attitude than the rest of the fighters. That’s saying something since each of the heroes has quite a bit of attitude up their sleeve. Lee just outshines them all when it comes down to it.

I’m still not a big fan of Gunner though. I think it’s just hard to come back from what he did in the first film. Being a full on traitor is not just a simple mistake. It’s a huge deal if you ask me. Can’t really get around that personally. Toll and Hale still don’t do much but they have bigger roles than last time so it’s certainly a start. Then you have the new member Billy but he doesn’t last very long. Also, you seriously know exactly how things are going to go for him the instant that he says this is his final mission. You don’t walk away from that.

As for Maggie, she looks good here. She knows how to defend herself and can fire off the gun as needed so she doesn’t hold the team back. Barney was worried about this as the beginning but she was able to put his fears to rest which is good. Then you have the latest guest star Booker. He gets two scenes here that are both pivotal. The guy is clearly an expert fighter and knows how to defend himself even without a team. The fact that he can do so well solo is really impressive and shows why he is not someone that you want to mess with.

As for the villains, they’re an upgrade over the first film’s guys. Both of the main ones can fight. First you have Hector who is the right hand man of the villain leader. The guy is a good fighter and keeps it close with Christmas. This makes for a satisfying end to the fight and the guy was certainly evil but worked well in the role. Meanwhile the main villain was also fun. He could certainly fight really well and was definitely ruthless the whole time. Not quite on the level where I’d call him a really memorable villain or anything but he’s definitely approaching that point.

Expendables 2 really makes sure that you’re at the edge of your seat throughout the film. The action is nonstop and the writing is really good. Every character here is a big shot and talks tough in every scene. That makes for a lot of good banter and the movie is able to balance it out well so that everyone gets their hype. If you’re a villain then you do not want to mess with any of these guys or you end up paying for it. The movie never deviates from the kind of experience you think you’re going to get here and that’s not a bad thing. This isn’t the kind of film to have a lot of twists and everything but to just give you a lot of great action scenes.

I did have just one issue with this one though. In the first film you have the villains taking people hostage and I was glad when the heroes just fired anyway to take the villains out first. In a hostage situation that is the right response in most situations. You don’t just drop your guns because then the villains can quickly shoot you and then shoot the hostage anyway. I don’t see any scenario where dropping your gun is the right option. In this film they lost that character development and dropped their guns…so the villain murdered the hostage. It reminds you of how futile that whole thing was. So the big lesson here is if someone tells you to drop your gun, you’re better off going out in a blaze of glory than actually dropping it. It’s similar to the whole “Don’t get in the car” when the guy with a gun tells you to or anything like that. The situation will only grow worse and worse if you follow those orders to better to make a break for it and at least have a chance to survive.

Overall, Expendables 2 was definitely great. I’d certainly recommend it. I think it’ll be very hard for any film to top this one with the amount of big name action stars running around and taking names. Even though there is a third film, this is the one that you would want to consider the peak. The others just aren’t quite ready to be at this one’s level just yet. If you like action and want to see a lot of characters sizing each other up and getting ready for battle, then this is the title for you!

Overall 8/10

Kano vs Valkyrie



Suggested by iKnowledge Valkyrie is a strong fighter who has good sword skills and has super strength as well. It wouldn’t be very easy to take her down for the count. Kano has super strength of his own and a solid eye blast but I don’t think any of that would be quite enough to take her out. She still has the overall advantage in combat and he’s just not quick enough to turn the tables here. Valkyrie wins.

Mandrill vs Sonya Blade



Suggested by iKnowledge Mandrill has powerful persuasion abilities but Sonya Blade definitely has enough willpower to prevent him from controlling her. At that point he is really out of options here because she is just way too skilled as a fighter. She could easily crush him with combo move after combo move and there isn’t a whole lot that he could do about it. A few good energy attacks and this guy is down for the count. Sonya Blade wins.

Ardyn Izunia vs Reverse Flash



Suggested by iKnowledge Reverse Flash and Ardyn Izunia are both speedsters whose abilities are far beyond that of mere mortals. Both know how to defeat other speedsters as well but I’d have to give this one to Ardyn. Speed to the point of teleportation is always really handy and the guy has energy blasts, magic, and a whole lot of other abilities as well. Reverse Flash doesn’t have any of that and that’s why he would end up getting left behind here. There’s just not a whole lot that he could do to stop Ardyn here. Ardyn Izunia wins.

Cassie Cage vs Arrowette



Suggested by iKnowledge Arrowette is an incredible athlete who is certainly world class but that won’t be quite enough to win in this round. Here’s why, Cassie is able to manipulate energy to buff her normal attacking power. That already makes her a very dangerous threat but throw in her natural hand to hand expertise as well and that’s a wrap. I don’t see Arrowette being able to do a whole lot in this fight. Arrows can’t beat guns. Cassie Cage wins.

Maki Genryusai vs Batgirl



Suggested by iKnowledge Maki definitely has the edge in pure hand to hand combat skills but I wouldn’t say that this is by a large margin. Batgirl is close enough where her gadgets will make up the difference and then some. It’s why gadgets are so useful in a fight like this. Hastily thrown they can end up being a liability but Batgirl is just as good at using those as she is at fighting. Ultimately that means Maki will be out of luck here. Batgirl wins.

Flash vs Toadman



Suggested by Destroyer Toadman is a strong fighter with his electric abilities but he’s never shown himself to be very fast. That will be his downfall here as he just isn’t going to be able to keep up. The Flash can pepper him with all sorts of attacks over and over to which Toadman will have no counter. Toadman’s durability isn’t amazing or anything so eventually he will certainly fall. Flash wins.

Crowley Eusford vs Alucard



Suggested by Destroyer Alucard is a fun vampire and I do like his abilities. I just don’t think they are much of a threat to Crowley. The guy can regenerate very quickly and his speed/power are on a different level. Alucard will be playing catch up right from the start and I don’t think he will be able to reduce the gap here. Crowley Eusford wins.

Titanosaurus vs Toadman



Suggested by Destroyer Titanosaurus is absolutely massive. They don’t call him a Kaiju for nothing after all and the way that he soars above everyone else is really quite impressive. This is absolutely the kind of guy that you don’t want to mess with. Still, he isn’t very fast and I don’t see him being able to do much of anything to Toadman. The two fighters are just in different leagues here and their abilities are too far apart even if Titanosaurus could potentially win with a strike or two, those hits just won’t happen. Toadman wins.

Update 1/18/2023: Toadman’s attack strategies and tactics have all been debunked to the point where they would not be enough to win. Titanosaurus can win after a long battle of attrition and will ultimately have enough left in the tank to take Toadman out. Titanosaurus wins.

Tsuyu Asui vs Toadman



Suggested by Destroyer Asui is a frog like fighter in her own right but she hasn’t really obtained any big powers yet. Nothing that would protect her from Toadman’s electric abilities at any rate. Toadman may not be the most powerful fighter but he has enough moves to secure the win here. Nobody’s keeping this toad down for very long and if he ever got a new appearance some day he could maybe go far. Toadman wins.