Nightcrawler Review

This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

This film is a cautionary tale showing that if you give a shady person an inch they’ll take a mile. A channel producer decides to start skirting the rules and ultimately it doesn’t go over well. You definitely feel like things go very conveniently for the main character that’s for sure. The blackmail part gets annoying because you feel like Lou doesn’t really have nearly as much leverage as he claims but lets dive in here.

The movie starts with Lou sneaking into a warehouse to steal some wires. A security guard tries to stop him but forgets that if someone is trespassing then he’s probably dangerous. The realization hits the guard too late as he’s knocked out and Lou escapes. Still, Lou wants to do something more with his life than all of these little side jobs. One day he comes across an accident and sees “Nightcrawlers” filming the accident and selling it to the channels. He has finally found his calling, Lou wants to do that. Can he become the best accident film recorder there ever was?

Lou’s a very obsessive person and once he has his goal he just latches onto it. Lou always seems to be in the right place at the right time for a big scoop and that’s not luck but his own training. He learns the police codes and buys a portable scanner so he can listen in on their reports. Slowly but surely he grows into being one of the more reliable recorders around and then decides to swing his influence. He wants Nina, the current host of the evening news program and decides to blackmail her. If she doesn’t agree to be with him then he’ll sell the news somewhere else. Meanwhile his partner Rick has to decide if this job is really worth his life.

For me the Nina plot is definitely a miss because I don’t see how she was taken in so quickly. Lou claims that if he leaves then Nina will almost certainly be fired because her ratings are low. Nina shouldn’t have bit on the bait and just let him walked out. She has already been job hopping a lot so what’s one more time? Additionally, if she gives him the high ground now then there is no escaping after this part. By the end Nina seems to genuinely like him or at least the fact that he gives her good ratings which is all she cares about. I definitely found her to be a pretty bad character.

Then you have Lou who is quite deranged and basically one of the big villains here even though he is the main character. Keep in mind that the film opens with him assaulting an officer and he also threatens Rick with violence a few times. Lou is constantly threatening everyone and while he says that he has been practicing to live a more peaceful life, it’s clear that he could snap at any second. He even says that he just doesn’t like people by the end of the film which explains why he acts the way that he does.

It’s not that he’s fearless but Lou is very detached from everything which allows him to get up close with the recordings and to tamper with active crime scenes. You’re hoping that he’ll walk into the wrong crime scene at one point and that will ultimately be what puts him in a tough position. The guy certainly gets away with a whole lot. He talks a good game but that’s really all he’s got since most of the villains here do have guns.

Rick means well and he’s a nice guy but I do have to blame him for not leaving earlier. He knows exactly the kinds of things that Lou is doing by the mid point of the film. Early on you can excuse him because he doesn’t know much about Lou and he desperately needed a job. By the end of the film though? That excuse no longer applies, Rick just goes with it because the money is getting better and he’s lasted this long. Rick just stays in the game too long and when you work for a villain that’s always going to be a big risk.

Then you have the detective Frontieri. She doesn’t get a really big role or anything like that but does turn up near the end for a pair of confrontations with Lou. It’s a tough situation because it’s clear that she’s good at her job but it’s hard to find proof or clues when you’re up against someone as clever as Lou. He knows to hide his tracks rather well and you suspect Rick is here as a patsy if needed.

The film is engaging for a while as you see just how far Lou will go in order to get the scoop. The main issue here is as I mentioned before, it seems like he gets away with way too much because nobody wants to stand up to him. Both Nina and Rick could and should have handled things way differently. Lou would also not have been in a position to do nearly as well without them so suddenly you’re looking at a very different film. The accident to his rival also seemed to come out of nowhere. I thought Lou was going to sabotage him or something but in the end it seems like it really was all just coincidence. Lucky eh?

Since Lou is filming various crimes and such, we do see quite a lot of bloodied bodies and the like as the film goes on. It’s not super graphic like this was a horror film or anything but it is filmed like real events which can make this just as intense. I think the actual footage could have been left off screen or hidden a bit which would have been a good move from the film. I did like how it showed the newscasters just saying whatever the producer wanted them to say though. It shows how effectively they’re given a script and they seamlessly introduce that into their speech. That was probably even the most effective scene in the film because it was really handled well. You could totally picture this being the case in real news reports, particularly volatile ones.

Overall, Nightcrawler is an interesting film and it has the hard job of trying to use the main villain as the main character. It’s tough for that to work for an entire film, particularly if the villain has no sympathetic goal or rationale to at least make you understand why he’s doing this. Lou’s just crazy which doesn’t work so well for the lead. Additionally due to the very nature of the film, you do see some rather graphic crimes. The movie feels like a real newscast which is impressive but at the same time works to its own detriment as well. With more likable characters this film could have gone far but without anyone to really root for aside from the detective who appears once or twice, the film was ultimately doomed.

Overall 3/10

Alien vs Predator Review


This is a movie I saw many years ago and I remember always being on team Aliens. I’ve always been partial to that group. Perhaps it’s because I’m more familiar with them, that they came first, or it’s just more fun to root for the monster. That hasn’t changed over the years either and after watching the movie I can really explain more why I prefer the aliens. See, while they are sentient, they are really just beasts at the core. They run on instinct and take everyone down. The Predators are actually an advanced alien race that really do whatever they please and tend to look rather corrupt. The whole film only exists because they like to hunt prey and use humans as sacrifices. Not exactly the group you would be rooting for.

Lets take a step back though. The movie starts with Charles locating a mysterious temple. It has details from various cultures and suggests that humanity actually united to create this a while back. He is older at this point and wants one last thing to be remembered by before he dies. So Charles assembles a group of the greatest scientific experts on the planet along with the ultimate guide in Alexa. She is skeptical at first but eventually decides to get on board. Little does this group realize that they won’t be the only sentient life in this area.

One thing that really separates this one from the average Alien and Predator titles is that the movie really leans into the cool sci-fi aesthetics. The scenes showing how the Predators are watching the temple, the alien ship, etc is all so much better than you would expect. This is a Sci-Fi film where you can see how advanced the technology is as opposed to us not seeing more of it. Usually it is fine to keep the Predators more secretive but in a vs film like this, I think this is the right approach.

So the visuals are unmatched and I thought the soundtrack was decent. I won’t say great since I don’t think you’ll even remember a bunch of the tunes by the end but they work well enough during the movie. The writing is good and the fights with the Aliens vs Predators will always raise your hype before they start just trying to get extra gritty.

Where the film falters is where most of these horror films falter. It tends to get excessively violent, particularly with the chest bursters that return from the Alien films. It seems like you can’t go through any alien film without having at least one of these scenes right? If you get rid of those entirely it would be a good move and just stick to the Xenmorphs. This is still a horror film at its core even with all of the in-fighting between groups but you don’t need the bursters for the scare scenes.

As the main character Alexa does well here. She points out that this is a very bad idea but ultimately ends up helping out because if she doesn’t then people will likely die. They may die anyway but at the very least if there weren’t any aliens she would have been able to keep everyone on the straight path. These guys also aren’t exactly the best at following orders so they need a tough commander.

I’m a bit iffy on her teaming up with the Predator so quickly after learning that they used humans as cattle but with the Aliens being mindless I suppose there wasn’t any chance of making peace with them either. Ultimately Alexa kept her wits about her and was fast to react. Alexa even manages to deal some real damage by the end so kudos there.

Charles is not nearly as likable. I get wanting to make a big discovery in the end but then once we find out that he’s sick, it’s a bit much. He’s putting everyone’s lives on the line just for the discovery? The guy’s rich, he could just wait until everyone has actually checked the rooms and made sure it’s safe before walking in. I’d say that would have been a whole lot better.

Maxwell’s his main right hand man and the guy can fight but I didn’t get why he was so antagonistic the whole time. It feels like that kind of comes out of nowhere and of course that never ends well for the humans in these things. It was good to have a gun at the ready though. We’ve got other characters here as well like the lady with a gun, the guy who just wants to go back home to his kids, etc. You’re mainly just wondering if any of these guys will survive aside from the main character or if it’s game over.

As for the battles, like I said I was rooting for the Aliens here. Effectively they are the underdogs as the Predators always plant them in positions where they should lose. When the Predators are on the losing side they just nuke the planet. Seems like they’re sore losers on that front eh? Fortunately for the Aliens they still have the advantage of berserker strength and their continued evolution. The Alien Queen looks really impressive in this movie to be sure.

Before the final battle we get a few skirmishes between the Aliens and Predators with each side taking some wins. Both sides also have a main fighter you could say. One alien in particular handles himself well as he gets up after being slashed and one of the predators takes a few of the aliens out as well. It helps build you up to the climax.

Then of course we do have a twist ending because those are absolutely necessary. Not just in horror but for any film, it’s just that horror tends to do them with the greatest effectiveness. Lets just say that it’s a really effective way to end the film as you understand the implications of this very well. Albeit it, you feel like it could potentially be a plot hole because the scanners should have sensed something. They would have to right? These scanners were shown to be extremely advanced throughout the movie and did notice an alien when it was inside of someone earlier. It should be the same concept but….maybe they got overconfident. I’ll chalk this up as a plot hole but a fairly small one at least.

Overall, Alien vs Predator definitely delivers on the kind of action that you would expect to see from two savage races fighting each other off. I’m also always a big fan of seeing crossovers come out. At the end of the day that makes for a lot of good fun when you get to the inevitable conclusion. It would be nice if it didn’t have to be so graphic though and of course the humans are stuck in the middle as well. If you can get past the violence then there’s definitely a solid film in here but it loses enough points where it ultimately isn’t able to sustain itself in the green. The best complement for the film though is that they really do nail the special effects. It’s the best that the franchise has ever looked.

Overall 3/10

Single White Female Review


The poster for this film is certainly ominous. Now, I’ve never been someone who was a big fan of the whole roommate concept. Sometimes you gotta do it because financially there’s no other option or you’re in a school where that’s the system. Okay fair enough. Deciding you want a stranger as a roommate for kicks/companionship? Well…that doesn’t seem like it’ll be a recipe for success and in a horror film like this one you can imagine that this is the case. (The music treats it like a horror at least)

The movie starts with Allie finding out that her boyfriend Sam is cheating on her. She kicks him out but later on he admits that it was just a mistake of passion and she ought to forgive him because he’s a nice guy. Allie refuses and says that she never will. That should be the end of the movie right then and there. Full stop, credits roll and we have a pretty bad movie but a short one. Instead, Allie decides that the place is too lonely by herself and so she advertises for a roommate. The insane Hedra shows up and Allie thinks this is a good setup. Hedra seems okay at first but she quickly begins to take control of the place, yelling at Allie and lying a whole lot. Can Allie stay safe while also entertaining the idea of getting back together with Sam?

First off, I definitely have a big problem with the whole getting back with Sam thing. Look, you can forgive him and give the guy a second chance at being a good human being. That’s fine and going further, that’s a good thing. Allowing him to become your boyfriend again is a whole other can of apples. A relationship is purely based on trust and so the instant it is broken like that, there is really no going back. Allie even mentions that she would never have known if not for the ex-wife calling and Sam basically confirms this as he admits that he wouldn’t have told her. So….what’s to stop him from having a moment of weakness again? I just don’t see how this could work.

Allie is clearly devastated by this betrayal to the point where she can’t really function without him for a bit. That’s concerning for a lot of reasons but going back to him isn’t the answer. So any scene that guy was in would definitely make me cringe. There’s really no good reason for cheating and any attempt to justify it just makes the whole thing worse and Sam tries to justify it with a straight face. Sure, I do believe him when he says he thought it was Allie at the end of the film and not the doppelganger, but it doesn’t really change anything for me. That guy was just bad.

I don’t like Allie much either for similar reasons. Aside from the whole rebounding thing, I also felt like she just let Hedra get away with too much. Allie had said no pets but quickly cracked anyway after Hedra brought a dog in. Later on Hedra insults Allie, yells, and acts like she owns the place. That’s when Allie should have kicked her out. The open flirting with Allie’s boyfriend was another red flag as well as the dog flying out the window. The instant the dog appeared I knew the film was going to take another turn for the worse as well. A dog’s mere existence in a horror film is usually the biggest death flag in all of cinema. It’s one of the aspects that will always end up holding horror films back from reaching their full potential.

Hedra? Well, she’s your average psychotic murderer. She has a hidden past that involves potentially drowning another kid although you learn the full truth behind that near the end or at least a good chunk of it. It’s reasonable to say based on how this is described that Hedra didn’t actually go that far. I was surprised at that myself but she still racks up a small body count by the end which was nearly bigger but she didn’t quite finish the job on one of them. There isn’t much to Hedra beyond that and nothing that really made her an interesting villain.

Then we have Allie’s next door neighbor Graham. He’s good, he always gives Allie some sound advice and helped as much as he could. It’s a little hard to buy how he lost to her in a fight though. Sam’s was also a little sketchy but you can pass that off as bad luck I suppose. Graham should have done better though as the whole situation was super sketchy and he was forewarned about her. That should have definitely been enough to stop her.

The climax is incredibly sloppy though. Now it’s not uncommon in horror films for the main hero/heroine to knock the villain down and instead of grabbing the gun just make a break for it but this movie does it around 4-5 times in a row which is absolutely crazy. I mean, if you have the villain on the ground then you absolutely have to grab the gun. Even if you don’t know how to fire it or something then you can toss it out the window or use it as a sledge hammer. At the absolute worst, just open the handle so all the bullets fall out. Otherwise you’re just letting the villain grab it again.

Allie could have played the whole thing way better than she did. Also, while she gets tied up off screen, presumably Allie let herself be tied up because Hedra had the gun. This is something you must never do. Okay, when the villain has a gun, the leverage is that they will shoot you if you don’t comply. If you’re in a hold up you freeze and do what they say because you’re giving them things with the expectation that you will walk out of there alive. This situation is massively different. Once you tie yourself up then the only real outcome here is that you’re going to die. You’ve just given the villain all the leverage with 0 upside to yourself. It’s better to make a break for the door and get shot in the back or (the better option) try to grab the gun and tackle the person. Sure, your odds are pretty high at dying but if you tie yourself your odds are at 100% without some plot armor to help you out.

So what I’m saying here is that you should never tie yourself up when held at gunpoint. Unless there are other hostages or something then this is just not worth it. More points away from Allie. Finally the only other character in the film is this random looney who desperately wants to force himself on Allie and there’s no reason for his inclusion except to try and give Hedra some points where she can say that Allie is too nice. I don’t think this is a case of Allie being too nice but just being way too oblivious. The guy was acting shady from the start and every line involved him flirting with her. So…staying back late at night to teach him something 1 on 1 sounds like a horrible idea from the start. This is definitely one guy where you don’t mind when Hedra confronts him because at least she’s not murdering some innocent person for once.

Overall, Single White Female is a film that is pretty unbelievable at almost every point in the story. You’re always going to be shaking your head at what is going on because it just doesn’t work. The characters range from bad to awful in most cases. The movie squeezes in animal violence for no reason and I wouldn’t exactly call the writing good. So it fails in almost every area which makes this a film you will want to skip. It’s just not worth checking out and the main message here is that Allie probably should have gone with one of the other roommates even if they seemed eccentric.

Overall 2/10

The Terminal Man Review


This one’s definitely more of a mean spirited film. You’ve got someone who’s sick and is trying to use some experimental technology and there doesn’t appear to be much in the way of gratitude. Nobody seems good at their jobs and even the lead doesn’t make sure to stay in the right areas to at least try more treatments. It ends up being a whole combination of errors where everyone is left in the wrong spot.

The movie starts with Harry being admitted into the hospital. He suffers from blackouts in a Jekyl & Hyde kind of condition. Before going under he will start to smell something metallic and then that awakens his violent form. In this mode he tries to destroy everyone and every thing in his way. Eventually the blackout will stop and he goes back to his normal mode but not before a whole lot of damage has been done. Right now that’s the burden that he has to endure.

Well, the hospital (I’m calling it a hospital but it might be more accurate to call it a private institution) has a solution. They will implant a chip (uh oh) into Harry which they claim should prevent the blackouts from occurring. It’ll do this by sending signals to his brain that forcibly stop this from occurring. Well, we’ll see if it works. If it doesn’t, then the world may have to prepare to try and stop Harry on his mad quest for vengeance.

Right off the bat you can see how things are not going to go very well for Harry. The scientists while not looney, just seem more interested in their computer chip than for the actual person. Harry’s effectively an experiment for them and they enjoy messing with his head by making him feel all kinds of emotions the whole time. It’s certainly not how you would want the experiment to go on and it just sets the tone from there on out. You have the guys gossiping in the background, the scientists laughing, etc.

Also, as a side note I do think it’s probably never worth putting a chip in your head. This is a rather extreme situation though so at least I can see why he did it. It seems like other treatments had been tried in the past and none of them worked so this was sort of a last ditch effort. It should always be a last ditch tactic so that part seems correct. Of course, the chip doesn’t work very well as you can probably guess.

The main mistake Harry makes is in leaving the facility. If he had stayed there then perhaps they could have found some way to treat him. I can’t 100% blame him for leaving though since as I described this was not exactly the best place to be treated in. So I totally get his wanting to get out of there as soon as possible. The main problem is that he is aware of his blackouts even though he doesn’t remember them. So going to hang out with friends or going to public places seems like it’s the wrong course of action.

Those are absolutely the last things that he should be doing here. The film also makes Harry appear to be a very intimidating guy even before the attacks. He doesn’t seem very stable. This is likely a byproduct of the various attacks but at the same time it also means that you’d expect security to be watching him a little more closely. It’s hard to see how he just escaped the facility in an instant like this.

I’d also have to blame Harry for going to Janet’s place when he knows that the attack could come at any second. It almost seems like he went there with the express purpose of threatening her in which case he was becoming more of a villain by the moment. Either way I didn’t care for him as the lead very much. He’s definitely going through an extremely rough condition so you feel bad for him but some of his decisions were pretty bad. If he at least stayed in the facility then perhaps some alterations could have been made to the chip to help him out. Or at the very least maybe they could have removed it if it was busted.

Janet is the main scientist who gets a role and she was not thrilled with this idea from the start. Unfortunately she was heavily outvoted so it didn’t matter. She does her best to help Harry and even by the end she is trying hard but there’s just not a whole lot she could realistically do at this point. She is a single employee in the facility and while her rank appears to be pretty high, she is still bound by the rules. Additionally, if the chip doesn’t work then it doesn’t work, at that point it’s really just a matter of deciding what to do next.

The film also has a very long surgery scene which could have absolutely been trimmed down. I wonder if it was just that long to show how the surgeon was very relaxed about the whole thing. He was busy taking shots at psychiatry and making jokes even though this is a super serious surgery. You’d think that he would have been more somber and regal about the whole thing instead of the way that he acted. Harry really couldn’t catch a break here.

So the film falters with the lead not being very likable and also with how mean all of the scientists appear to be. Or at least most of them. It can also be fairly violent with the background to the attacks as well as when he goes on the attack in the later part of the film. There aren’t quite as many victims as you may suspect but each one certainly goes down in a rather violent fashion. The only one who may have lived is the priest. It’s a little debatable due to how the scene is cut but I think if Harry had actually gotten him it would have been a bigger deal.

Overall, This is certainly not a feel good kind of film. It’s about Harry essentially hoping for a miracle to finally end his condition and it doesn’t work. From there the film just keeps up the more depressing tone until the end. There just wasn’t anything he could do and we saw Harry slowly lose his mind until it was just gone by the end. I’d certainly avoid this one if you’re trying to get someone interested in being a doctor. It won’t give off the right first impression. Ultimately there just isn’t anything to really get you invested in the film or to get you to have fun during it.

Overall 2/10

Outbreak Review

This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Time for a look at a film involving helicopter battles and a race to stop a deadly virus from destroying the entire planet. Films about outbreaks usually start off on the backfoot since you can expect a lot of rather gross imagery from the infected and probable animal experiments until they get the formula right. Still, if the film can get past that then the sky is the limit.

The movie starts with showing us how a village was completely wiped out by a powerful virus. That was nearly the end of it but then in the present the virus has returned. It attacks a village and manages to take most of the villagers down. Sam and his team try to get some research but after they leave the place ends up getting bombed to avoid any evidence from getting out. The bombs were not big enough though and the monkey escapes via some illegal animal capturing. The Monkey lands a quick slash on a few people and escapes again. The virus is now spreading fast and Sam wants to work on a cure but the government seems oddly hesitant to do anything about this. What are they hiding?

Outbreak straddles the line between being a conspiracy title where the government is trying to murder everyone (I definitely like to think we wouldn’t quickly just bomb a whole village) and a horror film where the virus is always one step ahead of the humans. Just when they get close to stopping it, it mutates into a new strain and runs off. It’s an opportune time to check this film out right now to see all of the parallels. One thing you have to say for the film is that the writing is on point. Sure the Helicopter battle may be a little dramatic but aside from that you could rename the virus to Covid and almost re-release this as a new film.

Sam is a decent main character as well. I mean, he’s not going to be shaking up your world or anything but he plays the role well and does his best to help out at all times. He may be getting stonewalled by the government but he keeps on trying even if it means disobeying orders. He’s really determined throughout the film and never loses his resolve.

Then you have his ex-wife Roberta who is trying her best as well. She sends Sam the information he needs and also takes a lot of risks on the front lines as she tries to help in developing the cure. Salt is a newcomer to the force who looks pretty bad at first but he does look solid by the end. I was definitely not impressed initially but when push came to shove he stepped up. He did a great job of flying the helicopter at the end.

I liked Sam’s best friend Casey as well. Casey really was a pro at this as well and was really the only person who could tell Sam to calm down at times. Not just anyone could do that and he was also quick to defend Sam or help him out discreetly like when the lead didn’t realize that his suit had a tear in it.

Then you have the two higher ups in the government. First is Ford who is one of the guys hiding a lot of information. He’s more interested in covering himself than in actually stopping the virus initially. Now, he is placed in a tough position and eventually he starts doing the right things but it does take him a while to come around.

McClintock is even more stubborn about this though and ends up being a full antagonist willing to murder other U.S. citizens just to bury his secret. He’s certainly not the kind of guy you want to have a boss but he makes for a good villain. The guy talks tough and has a ton of confidence which are both traits that you always want to see in the villain. This guy doesn’t even hesitate when trying to shoot everyone down.

So we’ve got good characters and a solid cast as well. The pacing is on point and you’ll certainly be engaged throughout. The writing is good and the film really takes its time explaining the threat and how this virus needs to be stopped. I also did enjoy the final action scene. It gave the film an explosive climax the way you’d like in these things.

My only real issue is of course with a virus naturally you’re going to see a lot of people really deteriorating as the virus travels through them. That means that the bodies aren’t always pleasant. Then you have characters puking and all. I was really worried at one point because it seemed like a monkey was about to die but fortunately that wasn’t the case. The film took the high road there which was great.

So Outbreak is a solid movie but it’s one that doesn’t have a whole lot of replay value. You’ll watch it once and enjoy it well enough but the slow pacing to show off the virus also means that watching it a second time feels out of the question. So I’d say it sort of ranks right in the middle.

Overall, If you want to watch a scenario of what if a virus showed up to threaten the world then this is a good flick to check out. You’ll see all of the different reactions to it in the film. One of the funnier scenes is when the government throws a big party and Sam is not exactly known for his low voice so Ford has to keep pulling him to the side so that nobody hears about the impending doom. After all at a party that’s probably the last thing they want to hear. The overall message at the end of the film is really that the government needs to crack down on the animal poachers and that’ll stop viruses from spreading all around. The poachers ended up dying anyway since they were at ground 0, but ideally you want to stop the situation from happening at all.

Overall 5/10

Life Review

This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Life is one of those films that plays out pretty much as you would expect. The main characters are considerably out of their league when they venture into outer space. Now, it may not be because of aliens, but I certainly wouldn’t want to go into space myself. It looks really constricting and of course you can’t just head home if you don’t like the experience. You’re stuck up there for a very long amount of time. Maybe at best you can ask everyone to put you back in stasis or something.

So the movie picks up with a group of scientists aboard a spaceship picking up what could be the first sign of life outside of Earth. It looks a bit like an amoeba but one that is quickly growing. Derry is thrilled and gets a little too obsessed with his research to the point where he starts disregarding safety protocols. Unfortunately this allows the alien known as Calvin to escape his cage and begin his massacre of the crew. Can they band together to stop him or will they ultimately be crushed?

Yeah so this is basically Alien only instead of fighting a powerful Xenomorph the heroes are battling with an Amoeba that gradually grows. The more Calvin grows, the more he begins to look like one of those mini Clover monsters from Cloverfield. The design for his final form actually isn’t bad. Sure, it’s not as threatening as the Xenomorph or anything like that but it does have a scary looking face.

Additionally, the fact that it can change shapes and move so fast makes it potentially more dangerous than a Xenomorph. At least with the Xeno you will die instantly when it tears through you while this monster tends to take its time with the prey and drag everything out. Yet another reason why you don’t want to be enemies with this guy since it definitely won’t be ending very well.

The crew are okay at best. First you have Derry who is very annoying. We have safety precautions for a reason and the instant he threw them away that was it. Additionally, even after Calvin has murdered at least 2 people you still have this guy saying how this could be a learning experience and everything. Really? That time has long since passed if you ask me.

Adams was the best member of the crew but unfortunately, he doesn’t last very long. At least he was trying to go on the attack, Calvin was just too fierce. For his bravery, Adams’ only reward is the most painful death in the film. Certainly not the way that you would want to go out and it’s always a disturbing way to die with the villain basically going inside of you.

Then there is Golovkina who also goes out in a super rough way. She had to make a tough call at the end and even if it didn’t work out, you can see why she made that decision. Bringing Calvin anywhere is a super big risk so at least in the vacuum of space you figure it wouldn’t be too bad. Calvin’s just too fast for any of that.
In any horror/survival film there has to be one character who just cracks under pressure. It’s a cinematic necessity and that’s Murakami’s role in this one. He splits from the rest of the crew to go to the life pod and as a result doesn’t really know what is going on until it’s too late. It’s too bad because he did all right for a while but couldn’t stick the landing.

Jordan is someone who really prefers being in space than on Earth. It’s an interesting character trait and one that you can understand. Again, I’m not a space guy but I can see why you’d want a break from all the fighting and war on Earth. Then you have North who came up with a lot of the safety protocols so it’s probably annoying for her to see how they aren’t quite working this time.

The effects aren’t bad. There’s just not a whole lot you can show in space so prepare to feel confined without a lot of cool backdrops or anything like that. Space scenes can also be rather slow since it’s hard to maneuver out there. Ultimately it’s just that the space setting isn’t very solid to me but it does what it can I suppose. Where the film really ends up shooting itself in the foot is with how gruesome it makes all of the deaths. You’d almost rather this was just a normal Xenomorph biting everyone.

This monster effectively drains your life force and explodes you from the inside out. Mix in the space effect where everything floats and you can see how the film gets a little creative there. They also manage to squeeze in some animal violence since of course there is also a mouse on board and Calvin can’t have any of that. There’s no reason that the mouse should have been here. The instant he appeared I knew that the little thing was doomed and that’s just not right. I wanted him to have a good time and hopefully get out of there in one piece. That would have been ideal but it was never a real possibility.

The ending was effective though as the kind of horror twist you’re always expecting. It plays out a little differently than I had guessed but certainly hits with the same intensity. The heroes underestimated Calvin one last time. It would lead into a sequel quite well as we get the government involved. I’m thinking the sequel would beat the original because Earth makes for a much more interesting setting. Alas, sequel are never guaranteed so we’ll see if that ever happens.

Overall, Life doesn’t add anything new to the equation. The setting limits how much fun it can really bring to the table and the movie focuses too much on how brutally Calvin can murder the crew instead of making this more of a slow burner thriller. Alien had better designs and ship layout even though it came out so long ago. The idea of finding aliens in space is always interesting and you should be engaged for a while but you can’t help but feel that the film left a lot on the table. There is so much more you can do with this concept without having to make it so brutal. Ultimately this is one that you should skip.

Overall 2/10

I Saw What You Did Review


Whenever a film’s main plot involves some shady crank calling, you know that it’s going to be very hard to find the main characters likable. I’ve seen at least one other film with the leads crank calling only in that one they messed with the wrong truck driver. Here they are dealing with a murderer but by all accounts this should not have actually been a very dangerous position for them. So how does this get dangerous? Buckle in because I’m going to break the situation down.

Libby’s parents are going to a big party and all of the babysitters are busy or out of town. Libby insists that she is mature enough to run the place and look after her little sister Tess. Additionally she has invited her friend Kit over as well. Kit’s father doesn’t know that the parents won’t be at home or he wouldn’t have agreed to it. Well, it’s a safe enough set up at least and you wouldn’t expect anything to go wrong at this point.

That changes when Libby says they should start prank calling people and saying dangerous things like “I saw what you did and I know who you are” Great way to get people upset at you right? Now in theory there is no caller ID, location tracking or any of that so they should be safe. Eventually they end up calling a guy named Steve and giving him the same tired message. What they don’t know is that he just murdered his wife and now the guy thinks they are on to them. They hang up of course and well that’s it…movie’s over.

The murderer’s on the loose but at least he’ll never be able to trace the call back or find these girls. Whoever called could be in any part of the city or even outside of it after all. Well…Libby decides to visit this guy’s house and takes the rest of her family with her. Naturally she allows her ID to be taken so the guy now has her name and address. Perfect….now she actually is in danger.

Here’s the problem with this plot, what happened is pretty much the only way this situation actually could have gotten lethal. Otherwise there’s just no way the villain ever should have gotten near her. Libby is shown to not just be irresponsible but also very unintelligent. She continues compounding her errors over and over again until she’s past the point of no return. It makes for a very unlikable heroine.

Kit is guilty to a lesser extent of tagging along but Libby was absolutely the main instigator here. If she had just tried to be a responsible guardian and do what she was supposed to then this would be a completely different film. When you also consider that this is her only chance to be home alone you’d think that she wouldn’t want to let it be ruined like this.

As for Kit, well she’s okay but definitely more of a follower than a leader. If she had put her foot down at any point then maybe this would be over. Tess is just a little kid so you can’t really blame her for much. She just wanted to have a good time and was expecting the usual sleepover activities. Hopefully the older girls would let her join in on the fun or something instead of being roped into a game of life and death.

As for Steve, well he’s your average maniac. Evidently his relationship with his wife was poor from the start and it kept deteriorating until he decided to take her down for the count. Then he goes into a rebound romance with Amy. So, Amy’s effectively the housemaid who has liked Steve for a while and knows this is her chance. She’s not a very smart villain though. For a long portion of the film she actually doesn’t know that Steve bumped his wife off even though the guy isn’t exactly very subtle at times like when he transports the body.

Still, once she does figure this out you’d figure that she would approach the situation cautiously. Maybe she wouldn’t even like him anymore since the guy’s a dangerous criminal. No, instead she continues her advances and even tries to blackmail him. Hmmm..blackmailing a criminal is probably a bad idea especially when there is no one else around. What did Amy think was going to happen?

She was bad from the start since she is trying to go after Steve so quickly but her actions just didn’t make sense. Meanwhile Steve probably should have tried to skip town instead of sticking around for so long if he really wanted to beat the charges. Perhaps he figured nobody would ever come in to check on the wife but that’s a short term solution at best. There’s definitely not much to him beyond being your average bad guy.

I was glad that the police officer got to look pretty good at the end. He did a good job of handling his business right away and also being on call when needed. The climax is satisfying and handled in a good way. It would have been nice if the parents had come home sooner though. Instead of wasting hours at the party, they should have made a move as soon as they couldn’t reach the house. Sure, it may have just been the main characters having fun on the phone but it seems to me like that’s not something you want to take any risks on. The stakes are just too high for that.

The writing in the film is good. Even if the situation itself feels really forced at times with how the characters put themselves into the worst situation possible, the actual script is on point. My only other issue there would be that they could have cut some of the prank calls out. It got annoying very quickly to hear Libby use the same line over and over again in all of the calls. Couldn’t she at least mix it up a bit? That part would drag out a lot and since I didn’t like the main characters as it was, that didn’t help matters.

Overall, I Saw What You Did is a film I would say to skip. The parts with the main characters are rather boring the whole time. Meanwhile it almost feels like a completely different movie with Steve’s section as the first murder is rather intense even if Amy’s is quicker. Amy’s is just humorous in the sense that she was really fighting to stay on the path where she is murdered. If she had done just about anything else then she actually could have escaped with her life. Prank calling just never pays.

Overall 4/10

Clear and Present Danger Review


Jack Ryan returns with this big sequel. Clear and Present Danger throws a pretty good story in with some fun fight scenes and a whole lot of characters moving around. It’s a very interesting film and one that should keep you on the edge of your seat from start to finish. I would definitely recommend checking it out.

The movie starts with some of the usual embezzlement going on. The drug cartels are growing a lot bolder now and this time they even murdered a friend of the president. That was a mistake though as he decides to take a harder look at the situation. He orders one of the higher ups in the army to take drastic measures and wipe these guys out. Cutter gets the message and sends John and his team on a mission. They have to wipe out Escobedo and his drug dealers fast.

Meanwhile Jack’s direct boss gets sick with cancer so Jack has been promoted. Cutter and Ritter don’t like this because Jack’s more of a by the books kind of guy. He’s not going to participate in these shady dealings but as their equal now it will be very difficult to hide things from him. So they have to play it cool while Jack does some sleuthing on his own. Technically all of them want to take Escobedo down. The issue is that Cutter’s group are illegally sending troops into the country while Jack is trying to find hard proof and use surveillance footage.

I like all of the political intrigue going on here. Everyone’s got their own agendas after all while Jack is really the only one just trying to do his job. You also can’t blame Jack for anything here. A lot of times I might say a character was slow on the uptake or missed obvious clues but I can’t say that in this case. I don’t think Jack really made any mistakes. He doesn’t know what he doesn’t know so there’s no way for him to act on this information. In a big government agency like this it’s also hard to see how he would possibly be able to find that out so it’s good that he knew the computer guy.

Once Jack does know what is going on he is quick to get in on the action and help John’s team. So that was good and overall he’s a great main character. He really did his best at all times and at the end of the series he steps up and does the right thing even though it’ll likely end up with a big punishment for him as well. You can’t ask for more out of the lead.

John’s character was also engaging with his adventures over in enemy territory. He leads the troops well and ultimately he fought hard. Considering how well versed he was in combat and planning he maybe should have expected the government to cut him loose the way they did, but it’s hard to prepare for every eventuality.

As for the government guys, well one of the big ones is certainly Ritter. He helps out with a lot of the deals behind the stage and is the main one hiding information from Jack. Ritter’s been in the game a long while and knows exactly what to prepare in order to stay ahead of the curve. He did quite well in that position as he even got a note from his boss in writing so nothing could really stop him. He’s certainly an antagonist, but a resourceful one.

Then you have his boss Cutter who is just as corrupt. The guy gets his orders from the President and carries them out. The guy even makes a deal with a terrorist which is going to very large extremes without a doubt. A lot of his decisions were definitely pretty bad like abandoning the troops behind enemy lines. As Ritter’s superior, the buck ultimately ended with Cutter so he should take the blame for that.

The President isn’t off for free either. He knew exactly what was going on with all of the messages that he gave to Cutter. The guy was definitely ruling with his emotions throughout and did not do justice to his station. As the President he really needed to keep on ruling with a fair hand and not let personal politics come into play. If he had just done that and attacked the drug dealers in a different way, while going through official channels then things could have gone over better. Sure, he got the results he was hoping for but at a much higher price and the ends don’t justify the means here.

For the drug dealers there were two main ones. First is Cortez who is the smart guy in the room who always tries to manipulate both sides. I liked his confidence and he has really been around a lot as we learn that he was also the informant for other guys in the past. He has a lot of power and came really close to ruling everything. The other guy is Escobedo who isn’t as smart but he does do some due diligence. Ultimately he’s smarter than your average mob boss but was getting outmaneuvered for most of the film. If anything he just got lucky in one scene as he was nearly taken out of the picture.

We get some in-fighting among the villains which always makes for a fun scene. Ultimately the film really goes by in a flash. The writing is on point and we have a whole lot of likable characters throughout. Even the antagonists are at least interesting. You’re not rooting for them or anything but there is a lot of good banter as well as back and forth dialogue among the two factions.

There isn’t a whole lot of action for a while but in the climax we do get some gun fights. Jack actually gets to go front and center against some of these villains as well and proves his stuff. You feel bad for the soldiers who didn’t make it out though as it was a pretty rough situation to be in. Particularly the ones who are captured since if anything you’d rather just go out in an instant during the fire fight. This probably helped Jack’s resolve quite a bit.

Overall, This was a solid follow up to the previous Jack Ryan film I saw. I would even say that this one defeats the first. The political fighting between the characters made for a good sub plot and it was also nice to see the old school hacking when Jack got to the computer. He may not have gotten a whole lot out of that before being caught but it was a good attempt. This is a very well rounded thriller film that will keep you engaged both with the explosions but also just with the good dialogue throughout. The main morale here is when you’re in the CIA, FBI, or any of those orgs you have to definitely watch your back at all times.

Overall 7/10

I Tell C Review


I Tell C is the next in the list of cancelled titles in Jump that I wanted to check out. It’s got a unique premise here to start off with but ultimately it’s just not a good one. I’m sure there are ways you could have spun this into something interesting but it would be difficult right off the bat because this just isn’t a great idea in my opinion. The core gimmick would need to be heavily reworked to really stand a chance at being the next big thing and the series ended long before that could happen.

The series starts off by introducing us to a criminal who just murdered somebody and figures he got away. Unfortunately for him there is someone who knows what he did. Her name is Aioi and she is a detective who abuses this position in order to find out info about criminals and catch them. Thing is, she doesn’t want to arrest them but to help the criminals out. See, Aioi falls in love with anyone who commits a bad deed but is so scary with her possessive stalking that the villain then runs over to the cops and turns himself in. Can the villains out run Aioi and will the cops continue to allow her to act like this?

It’s a rather loose plot summary and the thing is…it only works for the first 3-4 chapters before the plot changes again. Unlike many titles which have an easy general plot summary, I Tell C changes its approach for each arc so it’s hard to pin down. The pilot story is effectively showing us the story from a villain’s point of view, the next arc shows this to us from a hero’s point of view, the third arc is more of a comedic tale that turns into a thriller, the next arc is a Kaito Kid adventure, and then the final arc changes gears once more into a psychological battle.

I Tell C was always changing things up which is interesting if it’s trying to go more the anthology route but those have their own weaknesses as well. One of which is that you can never expect a whole lot of consistency there since some styles will naturally be a lot weaker than others. I would frown on using this style personally because even if it can work, it’s very difficult. The easiest kind of story to adapt here would be the first and have each story be by the villain’s perspective. It may not always work but it could capture the intensity of Aioi the most.

Before I go any further, let me break down why I disliked the series. The whole thing revolves around the fact that Aioi falls in love with criminals. This is incredibly suspect especially considering she works for the police. Now, maybe this wouldn’t be so bad if the villains were doing some more minor things like stealing bread from the deli or jaywalking. The problem is that almost all of Aioi’s opponents are mass murderers. These are people who are taking lives and she is talking about marrying them.

Aioi goes very far with this to the point where she defends them. One person just got done murdering at least 5 people that we know of and she explains that he was just lonely and needed someone to hold hands with. That’s just awful and the only way you could get around that would be if she was portrayed as a villain. When the series is portraying this to just be a fun quirky trait for the main character…well that’s a problem. The series missed another easy fix there which would have been to have Aioi not be a part of the police. Have her be another criminal that the police are trying to catch.

As Sakon notes in the first chapter, she may have caught the villain but she broke no less than 5 laws at the same time. So the police should really be arresting her as well but they choose to turn a blind eye. Effectively she is a villain who’s on the payroll and is tolerated because she is the best detective they’ve got. That’s just messed up and Aioi says on numerous occasions that she won’t arrest the criminals and will even help them get away if anything.

Later on she goes more into detail with her plan which is effectively that she figures if she marries a criminal then she can provide him with enough love where he will never commit a crime again. It’s just an incredibly naive goal because mass murderers aren’t going to change again. That’s yet another reason why I say the series would work better if these were just petty criminals. Then you can actually see why she would be acting like this. Reforming criminals is great and all but Aioi goes too far when she starts making excuses for them.

There’s a big difference between saying that person X deserves a fair second chance and should get a lenient sentence and saying that person X only murdered these people because he was lonely and shouldn’t have to go to prison. One is still going through the system and offering a recovery step afterwards while the other is just pure delusion. So Aioi brings the entire series down right from the jump to which I would say it never truly recovers.

The series ended with 21 chapters so there isn’t time for a lot of arcs. Lets quickly take a look at the various arcs. The series definitely had a rough beginning as the second half destroys the first chunk but I suppose it was too late for the series to properly course correct all the way. I already discussed the opening chapter for the most part but I would say it was one of the most effective ones. Seeing things from the villain’s point of view was interesting like with how demented Aioi appears the whole time. She is definitely not somebody you want to mess with.

We’re also introduced to the main two police officers Sakon and Ukon. Sakon instantly makes the most sense as he disapproves of these tactics but will never look very good. It’s just a solid pilot chapter and if the rest of the series were like this then there would be some more potential. I’ve already talked about Aioi so I’ll leave that character alone for now.

Sakon is a character who had a lot of potential. I liked him in the first chapter but after that he fades quickly. His whole gimmick is that he’s obsessed with strength so he is always lifting weights. He’s like your classic Shonen lead as he always wants to jump into action and do the right thing. These are all great traits but the problem is that he’s never helpful. He loses just about every fight he is in.

There’s on moment in particular that was embarrassing where he knocks a villain down and instead of pressing the advantage he tells everyone to run and gets out of there. If you tie up the villain at this moment then there is no danger to run from. He blew it in that arc but the main issue is that he seems to blow it in every arc which is a problem. He’s the resident strong guy but it never feels like it with how often he loses.

Then you have his brother Ukon who is more by the books. He’s with the rest of the cops in how they dislike Aioi so he doesn’t mind if she gets injured or dies on the case. As a result Ukon takes more of a backseat in these cases. He stops appearing fairly early on in the series and there’s not time for him to have a proper character moment. As a result he ends the series as a bit of an empty character.

After the opening case, we have to deal with an opponent who has been murdering a lot of girls because he’s another twisted guy. Even though he is murdering tons of people, Aioi finds this charming and wants to marry the guy. Problem #2 with this, she has no plan. She allows him to knock her out with the sleeping gas and get tied up. This was part of her plan but she had no exit strategy. This means that if Sakon doesn’t show up at the absolute perfect time then she would be dead right now.

What kind of main character is this? The story also felt unnecessarily dark with how this all played out. The heroes are able to save one victim at least but when you consider how many died that is just brutal. You don’t want to introduce a villain who is this much of a psychotic creep like this. Maybe for the final boss or something but it’s too dark too fast particularly with Aioi here. The first villain was at least rather normal and just murdered somebody.

So I really didn’t like that case and it’s probably the weakest in the series for me. The next case is the longest as the group heads to a mansion for some hot springs. Of course it turns out that the place is filled with murder. The mass murderer who destroys people and then steals their hands is in the area as well. Of course Aioi is thrilled about this but nobody else is.

It also introduces the main villain of the series Hikaru. He won’t appear in any more cases so you’ll have to savor him now. For reasons we don’t know yet, Aioi can’t stand him and he is the one villain that she wants to take down. From the context clues we do get, it seems like he pulled a Darth Vader and basically murdered himself. So the new him is now evil and the old Anakin version is no more.

Still, the old version did kidnap Aioi and cause her to get this whole Stockholm syndrome so he doesn’t seem like a great guy. I’m sure that the series would have gotten to this at some point but there’s no time. The guy’s not very interesting though. He doesn’t seem like a super mastermind with how easily they caught him. He doesn’t feel pain which is handy but it’s still really sloppy that Sakon let him get away. You should never let someone get away when you’ve defeated and disarmed them. The whole thing was embarrassing.

Lets just say that Sakon’s guard is so low he allows Hikaru to reach in his pocket and take out the gun. Ok….that’s sad. Hikaru can’t really fight either so he just takes every blow to the point where Aioi nearly murdered him. He sees the whole world as his personal novel to write so that could be an interesting trait. Him getting beaten severely by the heroes in their first appearance is hard to get back from though.

As for the hands villain, he was pretty awful. Remember once again that this is someone who has murdered a bunch of people. So it turns out that he just did need to hold somebody’s hand, in this case Aioi’s. Then he’s a changed man to the point where he even has a speech and attacks Hikaru. It’s just so disrespectful to the people he murdered that the guy could be changed so easily. He was also seconds away from murdering Aioi so it’s good that she can forgive and forget so easily.

That arc was a bit of a mess without a doubt. Next up is another big saga which introduces the Phantom Thief Mar. So this is a legendary thief that nobody knows the identity of. Mar steals a bunch of paintings of women and always returns them in a deformed state. Well, this time Aioi and the others have been asked to help. Why?

Well, after the events of the last case we got a time skip and the group was removed from the police. They’re now a shadow unit known as the I team who help out on the trickier cases and can break the rules. Of course by the same token they are also unofficial so it would be very easy to frame or shut them down. To introduce this concept there was also a pretty quick case where Aioi has to stop a bank robber and she makes her first arrest. At least now she is finally arresting people since it’s her only chance to get closer to finding Hikaru again.

Mar decides to let the heroes know her true identity though. It turns out that she is a girl who is obsessed with her own beauty. It’s not just a random character trait though as it actually ties into her backstory. Lets just say that she needs to be beautiful in order to complete her main objective. It’s an interesting plan and I’ll give the series credit for this being a unique one as well. Of course Aioi is torn because part of her wants Mar to succeed while part of her needs to catch this villain so it’s a tough call.

Sakon gets wrecked again as always though. It’s a pretty decent case even if Aioi is annoying the whole time though. Any scene of Aioi trying to pull the moves on Mar is a bit much and of course she hasn’t gotten completely past her phase of making excuses for the villain. Keep in mind that Mar is actively defacing popular paintings which are worth a ton of money and by the end this is portrayed as something almost heroic. Her father and grandfather look awful in the flashbacks though. Terrible characters through and through. Especially the father who completely lost sight of what matters. Also going back to the defacing property, lets just say that Aioi isn’t above doing such things as well.

So we got to meet Mar and interestingly it seems like she would not have been a reoccurring character. I liked the fact that she could fight but of course it did come at the expense of Sakon looking really bad again. This guy seriously could not catch a break and there’s no way I could take him seriously as a fighter after this. There was just no way. Mar’s origin story was certainly emotional although it doesn’t justify her wrecking private property like this. She easily beats a lot of the other villains we’ve seen so far though.

Then we have the chief of the I team Akiraka who is Aioi’s self proclaimed father. Technically there is no relation but that’s the role that he sees himself in which is something. There’s not much to him yet so he’s more of a bland character than the others. Finally this takes us to the last case where we meet the suicide bomber Aichi. Basically he wants to throw his life away because he has lost all hope and has stationed himself inside of a building.

There is a clear timer on the bomb so he is giving everyone a chance to leave safely. The password to deactivate the bomb is one letter long but you only get one chance to guess or the bomb will blow up right away. It makes for an interesting word game and some solving skills. It’s a fairly small case but one that works easily enough. The main issue is that afterwards Aichi joins the team which is how the series ends. You’re telling me that a suicide bomber who nearly blew the building up and caused a lot of damage is allowed to join the I team just like that? I don’t know that seems like a bit of a stretch.

Aichi seems to have a crush on Aioi but there isn’t a whole lot more that we know about his personality yet. He has a bit of a sarcastic streak to him but ultimately the series ended before we could learn more. There’s also Aioi’s informant, but we don’t know much about him beyond the fact that he likes everything to be in perfect halves. It’s an interesting quirk but right now that’s all it is so we’ll have to wait a bit to see if he’s a good character or not. Right now I’m not impressed.

Finally you have Homura who has a crush on Sakon but you already know that she is doomed since inevitably Aioi would get picked. Homura is an expert with a gun but that’s not too helpful when Mar is a bullet timer and Homura doesn’t appear for the other cases. She has a lot of potential and is one of the more likable characters. It’s just too bad that she didn’t get to appear much. So that wraps up the characters and the plot of the series. As you can see, I just can’t get past the core concept of the series.

When you start to try and make excuses for the murderers running around town I just have a hard time buying into it. Aioi’s obsession is taken way too far with all of her lines being about love and marriage with the villains. Even casually she won’t talk to characters much unless they have some kind of criminal record. It’s all meant to be very funny of course but the humor really doesn’t click.

In general the writing is okay I suppose. I found it a bit ironic that most of the arcs have no actual mysteries though even though this seems like it’s supposed to be a mystery series. The only case that would qualify are the first 2 so after the first 3 chapters that is dropped entirely. The hotel is a thriller, the phantom thief arc is really just a chase, and the final arc is a negotiation. Maybe the author got bored of doing straight mysteries.

As for the art, it’s not as great as some of the other recent titles I’ve read but it’s good. My main issue is that the character designs aren’t always very distinct. Some panels will have a lot of detail and then suddenly others won’t. It’s not super consistent but it’s still clear enough where I can always tell what is going on so ultimately I would give the series a green checkmark on this.

So, how would I prevent this series from being cancelled? Well I’m sure you know what my first change will be. Definitely completely change Aioi’s character to the core. No more falling in love with every criminal and justifying their actions. Now, if you need that to be present or this would be a different series, then instead just have her be another villain. Make this a Carmen Sandiego kind of series.

Aioi always finds the villain first and tries to marry them only for the main two cops Sakon and Ukon to appear and foil her plans. She always runs off while they catch the villain. I think that would immediately be a much better dynamic and would fix things in a pinch. That would make the series a whole lot more approachable and I just think it would be a much better core concept. As a mild aside, I would also say to make the main villain a little more threatening so he shouldn’t get completely beaten up in his first appearance. That’s not the right way to set up the villain.

Overall, You can just see why I Tell C was cancelled. You really just won’t be able to save this premise very easily and it’s a shame because we can always use a good mystery series. Aioi has to be one of the worst main characters I’ve ever seen in a manga. Hopefully if the series were to ever come back the author would be able to fix some of the issues here. Just go for a big change up and hope for the best.

Overall 4/10

The Snowman Review

This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time to take a look at a horror film that you probably saw some promotion for back in the day. It’s certainly not ready to be one of the popular big leaguers like Halloween or anything like that but it was trying to do something a little different with the whole snow theme. Unfortunately it’s just a pretty bad horror movie that falls into all of the usual issues associated with the genre.

We start out with a kid being forced to witness his drunk father attack his mother after his lessons did not go well and then we cut to the present. You’re probably wondering what the point of that intro scene was but it’s all to set up some motivations later on. So our main character here is Harry. He’s supposed to be a brilliant investigator but unfortunately he’s always drunk and passing out in random places. He got divorced a while back and is unable to really connect with his kid. They get along but he always ended up having to cancel their chances to hang out since he loses track of time.

That may be happening again as a brutal serial killer is on the loose. He’s only targeting ladies so Harry needs to figure out what the connection here is. His partner on the case will be a lady named Katrine who knows of him from his rep but isn’t too impressed. Harry doesn’t even have a license anymore at this point and barely contributes to the case until the murders intensify. Then it’s time for him to finally get involved but can they really take down this villain?

Well, I’ve got a ton of issues with the film as you would expect. First off to get the obvious out of the way, the movie can be quite violent. You actually have bodies completely torn apart and such. The snow hides the details a tiny bit I suppose but not really, it just throws an artistic touch on the whole thing. The villains whole gimmick is dismembering his targets which is certainly quiet gritty. Not even Harry can get away from this guy without some kind of injury.

To that effect it’s probably hard to write a film with a mass murder villain without things getting a little intense but this one goes as far as it can. We also get some super random animal violence with one character chopping up some chickens out back. The scene has no real point to it except to make the heroes look a little sloppy. Got a call saying that this character was missing and they leave her alone? Sure, it could be a crank call some days but with a mass murderer on the loose and leaving Harry pictures that seems like a long shot.

Additionally, there’s a sub plot about a rich guy taking pictures of women and basically doing a lot of sleazy things. This plot comes out of nowhere and to this day I still feel like it had absolutely no purpose in the film. It doesn’t really change anything nor does it actually give us a proper red herring. I don’t think anyone thought for a moment that this old and rather overweight guy was the true villain here. I mean it would have certainly be a twist but he doesn’t even work as a red herring.

Harry isn’t a particularly good main character either. I refuse to believe that he’s some kind of genius because he never shows it. The most humiliating thing here has to be when he finds some guy in his house and doesn’t question it. He accepts the story that it’s just someone in here to make repairs to the house. Hmmmm….nice. Doesn’t matter if the guy is legit or not, that’s a huge red flag. Then Harry goes back to the house later on and the guy has broken in again and is singing a lot.

The whole drunk angle is also annoying. The main villain could have literally murdered him in one scene but instead chooses to take a picture of Harry and tell him to stop falling asleep. When the villain has to give you a pep talk you know that you have sunk rather low. Harry really needs to step up his game and by the very end of the film maybe he has…maybe.

He also participates in a brief affair with his ex wife Rakel who is currently re-married. Yes, she instigated but he allows it to happen without any real resistance which is just bad. So I did not like Harry as the main character one bit. Likewise as you can probably guess I was not a fan of Rakel either. Rakel is actively cheating on her husband and doesn’t seem to get along with him much for no real reason. She can be very slow on the uptake as well. If you take a few scenes away then sure she could be a good character. At least she tries looking after Oleg as best she can but even that doesn’t really work.

As for Oleg, well you always need to have a kid character running around I suppose but he doesn’t really add much to the plot. He’s around but that’s it. Then you have Mathias, the new father on the block. He does his best to help Harry adjust and doesn’t seem to mind how close the main two are which is good even if the trust backfires in this instance.

As for Katrine, she’s a good detective and really does a lot of the legwork here. At first Harry is no help so she really has to do everything. Unfortunately she does take some huge risks by the end and is also forced to try and use her charms to get into the possible villain lair. Always a horrible tactic I must say since I prefer the characters just use their spy techniques to get to where they need to be.

The whole scene just feels a bit mean spirited the whole time though. The way she goes out is rather dragged out and painful. It would have been nice if it could have at least been a quick end instead but the Snowman really puts the characters through the wringer the whole time. As for the Snowman himself, well it goes without saying that I don’t like the guy. He’s just your average psychotic who has a whole snow theme about him. The guy is pretty fast and always manages to be in the right place at the right time though.

Maybe if Harry had been drinking less he could have prevented a few more of the murders. Unfortunately the body count is rather big by the end so any victory feels like a hollow one. The Snowman isn’t a particularly long movie but it does feel that way at times. There just isn’t much to like with how grim the film is. There aren’t a lot of good things to say about it, but I do like the backdrops.

I’m a city guy first and foremost when it comes to cinematic backdrops, but the snowy wilderness works very well in the movie. The snow has a very natural feeling of intrigue to it and really supports a mystery film. I think if this film had leaned more into being a mystery film than a horror title that it could have gone places. Focus less on the actual murders and more on picking up the clues. That would have worked out fairly well.

The only other effective moment for me would have to be the very final scene of the movie. I thought this was good and could have even worked as an after credits scene. Lets just say that it completely sets up the sequel and this next case sounds fairly dangerous as well. Presumably Harry is finally back to peak condition and won’t be drinking anymore as well. If that is the case then the sequel would already have a better main character so that would be promising. I seem to recall a good musical theme here so I’ll give that to the movie as well.

Overall, The Snowman is basically your average horror film. While the actual murder weapon is rather creative and the Snowman angle is interesting, the film just doesn’t work. It’s all over the place like with the whole filler plot about the corrupt mayor/town official guy. I still say all of those scenes could have been cut out and the heroine should have gotten a better death rather than the brutal way that she went out. The film is going for a lot of shock value and brutal deaths when it really should have been trying to captivate us with the mystery itself. I would say to give this one a definite pass.

Overall 2/10