“At what point did you realize you were playing the worst game of all time?” I always like thought prompts like that. Usually the answers are pretty fun, especially when the person is still playing the game. Well, I started to have this question pop in my head as I was playing the game but I know deep in my heart that this isn’t the worst game of all time. Man did it try though. The gameplay is really bad and the stylus destroys any potential that it might have had. Make no mistake, this isn’t a game that you play…it’s a game that plays you.

The game starts with Wario watching TV as he wishes he were rich but then he comes up with a brilliant idea. Why not teleport inside the TV show and get rich??? He is a mega genius after all so he invents a helmet that lets him break the boundaries between dimensions and hops inside. He steals a wand from Mr. Cannoli and now wants to assemble the missing relic pieces to get his wishes granted. Yes, everything is going well for Wario but is he dabbling with powers beyond his comprehension?

The story isn’t particularly interesting so you’ll tune out early on. There are parts that are ironically fun like Cannoli’s theme that plays whenever he appears. That was pretty fun because it was a quality theme. Additionally I would say the game does try to throw in a lot of lore and hype by the end. It was just so deep into the game that it was basically over by then. They should have found a way to make things a little more interesting before then. The idea of a more plot based Nintendo game is always fun, you just have to handle it with the greatest of care.

It all comes down to the gameplay though. A game can have a terrible story but still be fun with the right gameplay. Well sadly it doesn’t deliver. The game is built around transforming into different Wario forms and using their abilities to solve puzzles. The goal is to get to the end of the level and find a relic or beat up a boss. The levels range from being 20-90 minutes long. I think they’re all meant to be more like 20-30 based on how the play time goes red as it gets too long but good luck figuring these out so fast. The levels are as poorly developed as possible.

To switch costumes you have to draw on the screen but the game is very particular about the drawings themselves. This means you often have to try and transform more than once in order to actually get into the form. This part is what will have you shaking your head. It just doesn’t make sense…none of it makes sense. So yeah that part definitely stings and then the powers themselves also use the stylus. To fly you have to blow into the 3DS microphone so be prepared to do that a whole lot near the end.

You have to open treasure chests to get key items and these require you to play through the same 5 minigames over and over again. Definitely brutal stuff and some of them just feel rigged. There is one minigame about tracing objects that I never got right even once. Fortunately the treasure chests do change the minigame every time so even if you lose once then you can try again and it’ll be a different minigame. That should provide some solace at least.

Then you have a 1-2 checkpoints in a level so you respawn there when you die. Yes, if you die to a boss be prepared to have to go through a few rooms again to get back there. Additionally some of the puzzles deactivate so you have to solve them again. You already know the answers by this point so it’s not too bad but it’s still tedious. The game almost goes out of its way to be as tedious as possible and that’s what will have you shaking your head. This was not supposed to go this way. The game was supposed to be intense and awesome, not a total letdown like this.

It comes down to why you don’t want to tie your game into a gimmick because it will always backfire. The stylus just isn’t fun to use. Never was…never will be. When I play a platformer I want to be actually playing it. At least I can say that the graphics aren’t bad. The character designs are actually good like with the final boss. The game does turn out on the visuals. The soundtrack is way more on the repetitive side but I still wouldn’t say that it’s bad. The Cannoli theme is good like I mentioned before. I think there is some kind of true ending if you get all the treasures in the game too so it had a bit of replay value. Not enough to even be remotely tempting mind you, but if you enjoyed the game then there’s that. Although none of the treasures are even hidden so if you liked the game a lot then you will have probably gotten them already. The game feels rather long so I guess it earns the price you paid to get it at least.

Overall, Wario: Master of Disguise feels rather disgraceful most of the time. You’d think it would be on the level of Mario or something but it’s not even close. The game is definitely not up to Nintendo’s seal of quality the whole time. Everything feels slapped together without a lot of care or consideration. I wanted the game to be better but I had to shake my head while playing it. The game doesn’t have any quality of life features and so playing through it can be a bit of a chore. It’s just not the big game that I thought it was. You want to stay far, far away from this one. It’s just a recipe for disaster.

Overall 3/10