It! Review


It’s not time for that clown horror film, instead it’s time to look at a lesser known one involving a golem. It was a little better than I was expecting to be honest. The characters aren’t the best but I would say that in a way the film had a subtle sense of humor about it. It may have been unintentional but it still worked and the film ends up being one that you won’t be forgetting about anytime soon.

The movie introduces us to a disturbed man named Arthur. There’s always been something really off about him and the film doesn’t need to go into detail on this to assure you that he is someone to stay away from. He looks forward to getting a big promotion as the curator eventually but the process is taking a while. One day there is a huge fire where everything in a nearby storage area burns down except for a single golem. Arthur’s boss asks him for something to read it better with but Arthur is slow to move and the golem ends up crushing the guy.

Now Arthur can get his promotion right? Well, instead the board goes with someone else which is definitely upsetting. Arthur decides to actively use the golem as a weapon of destruction in order to clear out the competitors as well as impress his crush Ellen. Ellen seems to feel bad for Arthur and humors him to an extent but she actually likes the fancy guy from New York named Jim. Jim will definitely need to watch out now, but what can he do against a golem?

There are some parts of the film that don’t fully seem to make sense but I suppose you can fill in the blanks. For example the Golem initially seems to do whatever it wants like when it murders the curator by crushing him but then after Arthur actually activates it, the golem begins to work for him. So in the initial scenes, was the Golem working on past programming or something? Additionally, Arthur picked up the trick to controlling it rather quickly when you’d expect that he would have just been another victim.

The film tries to show that perhaps insulting the golem is what makes it made but it’s not like the original curator did that. So it’s going to be a little hard to really understand the golem’s motives. I suppose they aren’t that important. It has a fairly decent design and is definitely very powerful as shown in the bridge incident. He makes for a decent villain but of course is very slow so any fighter who is paying attention should be able to dodge the attacks.

Then we have Arthur who really looks bad here. Aside from being crazy and all, he is desperately going after a lady who is clearly not interested in him. She makes it rather obvious and while I think she could have been sterner, he’s got to take a hint. Arthur is just so desperate and controlling a golem could have easily made him rich and successful if he used it the right away. Then perhaps she would have been more interested in him.

No, instead he just thinks destroying a bridge will impress her for some reason. Ellen is rather naive though like when she gets a call from Arthur late at night saying how he desperately needs to see her. Ellen seriously considers going even if Jim was encouraging this before the twist that he would go in her place. That should have been a notion that would be impossible to her. It’s an extremely bad idea to meet anyone alone at night, particularly someone who has a big one sided crush on you.

Jim is a fun character though, albeit he could be a little overconfident at times. Meeting up with Arthur when he started to have suspicions of wrongdoing was very risky. In fact, there were several times where Arthur came close to destroying Jim. The whole thing could have gone sideways for him in an instant. I do like confidence though and that does help keep Jim higher than he would be otherwise.

There is definitely a body count in this film although the kills aren’t as violet as in other horror titles. There is a level of violence to be sure but you can tell the film is more interested in the overall premise than being a splattershow. So I appreciated the restraint there. As a result the film can actually be a good bit of fun at times. While crazy, it is fun to see Arthur dropping veiled threats and outmaneuvering everybody even when he’s rather sloppy.

The whole hiding the key in the bookshelf idea for example was so risky since someone could have checked there before and realized that the key had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. He also takes super unnecessary risks in stealing artifacts from the museum before returning them. This guy is definitely not a mastermind and without the golem he would have been taken down a lot sooner. The climax is also a whole lot more explosive than I would have guessed.

Overall, It! was a little better than I expected. I do think part of the charm is in a cheesy/camp kind of way though. The film takes itself moderately serious but as long as you can have fun with it then you’ll be okay. If you are looking for a really scary film then this will not be the one for you though. Also if you’re hoping for a real romance, the movie doesn’t have much time for that either. No, it’s more about the reverse romance of figuring out if the golem is actually alive and who is controlling it. As the viewer you have all the answers and are waiting for the others to figure it out. The execution was key and ultimately it was good enough here. I have a feeling that the clown movies would not be able to compete.

Overall 6/10

The Ghost of Yotsuya Review


It’s time to look at a well known foreign horror film and unfortunately this one was pretty bad. I was expecting some decent entertainment and all but in the end it takes way too long for the ghost to show up. It turns out to be more of a messed up drama for most of the film and the villains stay really annoying throughout. It’s always one of the risks you run when you have a film built around a bunch of villains. You’re waiting for justice but in a film like this it will be a long time coming.

The movie starts with a guy named Iemon wanting to marry Oiwa. He had a bit of a deal with her father but the guy changed his mind and it’s easy to see why. Iemon doesn’t seem like the most put together fellow around. He has let himself go and is patrolling the streets like a homeless person. Well, ultimately he decides to murder her father and his guards. Then he makes his move on Oiwa who essentially decides to get with him as long as he avenges her father’s death. Iemon wants to keep the charade up forever but one guy, Naosuke happens to have witnessed the murder and begins his blackmail. He basically wants Oiwa’s sister as his compensation and keeps on blackmailing Iemon. The two of them continue to sink deeper into this conspiracy.

Now this is really just a problem with the old Japan type films but the honor system goes way too far the whole time. The fact that both girls are willing to marry guys they don’t love just for the vengeance angle is too much. Oiwa at least doesn’t mind Iemon all that much but the sister didn’t like Naosuke at all and still goes through with this. All of their scenes are absolutely brutal. You’re just waiting for the ghost to show up already.

Unfortunately, the ghost angle isn’t a factor until the film is nearly over. So first you have to see Iemon humiliating Oiwa over and over again as he proves to be a terrible husband and even prepares to marry another girl on the side. His love for Oiwa wasn’t even true which just makes Iemon even worse of a character. Obviously he was a villain/murderer from the start but at least if he really loved Oiwa there would be some sense of humanity left. Instead, he is just a shallow guy who gets bored quickly and then continues to inflate his body count.

He can’t stop himself from murdering more and more people and that does not help his final goals. It just gets him deeper into trouble. Not that you feel bad for him but he takes up an enormous amount of screentime. What really hurts the film is that there are no likable characters. The two girls look naive and too trusting for most of this. They are also far too passive as they just wait for the guys to take revenge for them while they stay home. It’s pretty clear that the guys are getting nowhere fast.

As for the ghost, well she is fun to have around once she finally does make a move but even then it takes her a long time to actually take down Iemon. Also, right before becoming a ghost she did end up finishing off a baby so it’s not like they were shaping her up to be a hero either. The whole film is extremely drawn out even though it technically isn’t even a very long film. Mix that in with all of the characters being pretty bad and this was a recipe for disaster.

I’m not a fan of the old time aesthetic and this certainly wouldn’t change my mind on that. You will be left shaking your head the whole time and I wouldn’t even be able to blame you. The whole honor system just doesn’t work and I want the characters to be louder and more pro active. A guy like Iemon should never have gotten as far as he did. Even at the very end of the film he puts up way more of a fight than he should have. Is this guy secretly an absolute swords master or something?

He got too much hype and too much screentime. I’m rarely going to be able to really tolerate a film centered around a super unlikable villain without either seriously amazing supporting characters or a great hero to root for that takes him out in the end. A film like this one is just too depressing and dreary the whole time. It doesn’t leave you with any hope for the characters and is just not a fun one to watch. At the end of the day it forgets about the film’s main objective which is to be a fun and enjoyable film. There is nothing like that here.

Overall, A film like Ghost of Yotsuya was really doomed to fail from the start. The core plot is already not that engaging and you would need either a good amount of humor or something light hearted to balance it out. This film is taking itself deadly serious and so that means it is necessarily going to be a rather tough watch. You need to either have a really happy ending at the ready to balance the tough journey or for the villain to start getting his just desserts at a much earlier time. If you aren’t able to do either of those things, then the film is always going to be in a rather rough spot. There isn’t really any way around that. If you want to watch an authentic horror title, check out Godzilla instead.

Overall 0/10

Messiah of Evil Review


It’s time for a zombie type of film and unfortunately I can assure you that it is not one of the good ones. There is no real escape for the heroes and while the film maintains a rather spooky atmosphere throughout, it never ends up taking advantage of this. What could have been a really intense cerebral horror film quickly becomes just another slasher to have to contend with. That is unfortunate but not entirely unexpected.

The film starts with a girl named Arletty deciding to look for her father. He left her a note saying not to do this as well as a whole book of notes but she doesn’t have time to read them in depth. When she arrives in town, the place is rather odd. One of the travelers at the gas station seemed rather off and then the town itself is fairly empty. There is an eccentric guy named Thom who is surrounded by girls and lives a life of luxury but it all seems rather empty. Arletty wants to continue on her mission but it does seem like the longer she stays here, the greater her risk of death will be.

Naturally she should have listened to her father’s note telling her not to follow him. That would have ended things right away and surely he wouldn’t have just sent her that notice for no reason right? She also should have read the whole book right away and planned for the worst. Now it’s not like there is a whole lot she could have done against the crazy zombies that would end up appearing but at least she would have been pretty well prepared. Instead she doesn’t really have a plan and always ends up being at a disadvantage.

She’s also a bit too trusting with letting Thom and his friends stay over right away. She doesn’t even know these people and odds are that they were crazy. Even by the end of the film Arletty is forced to take on more of a spectator role here as she can only wait until the inevitable happens. It’s always more fun when the protagonist can actually do a lot of stuff but in this case you could say that she was just a participant in a conspiracy that was much bigger than her. She wasn’t exactly the central focus this time.

Then we have Thom who is a bit of a space case. He tries to be calm and collected at all times but it can feel like a mask. He is quick to subtly threaten one of the girls when he feels like she has been too rude. Thom does well in the fighting near the end but ultimately it wasn’t really enough to turn the tides.

The characters are battling what is effectively an endless horde of monsters after all. Take one down and a few more will take the original’s place. It’s not like the main characters got a debriefing on this either so they’re going into the situation cold. The zombies are all cannibals, so the deaths are particularly gruesome. The film is going for max edge here and that’s really where you knew the film couldn’t come back from. It’s why I’m generally not a big zombie fan, it will usually lead to these kind of events which is hard to write around.

Since the heroes don’t really stand a chance, it also runs into the issue of the whole thing feeling futile. When the characters literally have no possible way to win, it is harder to get engaged into what is happening. If the film kept the threat vague then it might be able to survive on the atmosphere alone, but throw everything else in and you’re not likely going to come back from that.

The film has the cops show up at one point which made for an interesting addition, but unfortunately they are dispatched quickly. The way it was done was also unfortunate because it underscored that you could be turned into a zombie without being bit previously. I interpreted it as the red moon being able to transform anyone who is caught in its rays but of course then that makes things even more unfair. The villains also have a supernatural leader who has intense abilities of his own. That really doesn’t help the case for the heroes.

So the film ends up feeling rather mean spirited with the heroes having no chance and you just slowly watch as they end up dying. There’s not a lot of fun to be had with a premise like that and the film should have tried becoming an action title instead. At the very least, it does serve as a reminder that zombie films are not often going to be very good. If you see that as a genre then you know that you’re probably doomed.

Considering how dreary the film was overall, I’m surprised the ending didn’t have a little more pop. By the end of the film, we know that humanity is going to be destroyed but it’s handled in a very quiet way. I would have preferred that the invasion begins and that’s how the film ends. You may as well have things end in an exciting way like that right? It would certainly make the ending more exciting and memorable at least.

Overall, Messiah of Evil is definitely a film I’d stay far away from. There are no real positive moments to offset all the negatives here. The characters are pretty bad and the film just gets way too gruesome the whole time. It sets the tone early with the gas station murder. If the main characters could have done more damage and set this up as a more even fight then that could have helped. Have the zombies be traditionally slow or something. By allowing them to move at normal speeds like a human, it just makes them completely unstoppable. I don’t see how anybody is supposed to fight off powerful creatures like that.

Overall 0/10

Baron Blood Review


It’s time for a movie that you could tell was going to go off the rails almost immediately. The characters are pretty bad and the whole film is one of the biggest compilations of self inflicted wounds that I have seen in a very long time. Definitely not going to go down as one of the next big horror films and I can see why nobody talks about this one. The baron is not a winner.

The film starts off with a guy named Peter deciding to visit his relatives. He wants a break from the usual routine of school work and what better way than by learning about the legend of Baron Blood? This guy was an ancestor of Peter’s after all. It doesn’t matter that the Baron was known to be an incredibly evil man. Peter is curious to know more about him. So when Peter learns about a spell that could summon the Baron back to life, he doesn’t hesitate to use it. Everyone warns him about this but he doesn’t care! After using the spell, mysterious things begin to happen. People begin to get murdered but surely this isn’t because of what Peter did right? There was another spell to destroy the Baron once more but due to a lot of carelessness, it ends up being burned. Is there any way to stop the Baron?

I think the biggest problem right away with Peter is that he has virtually no remorse for what he’s done. People are literally being murdered in gruesome ways and he’s still interested in how the spell worked. He continues to act fascinated and excited by what is going on even after the negative effects have been well under way. That doesn’t sound like a good character to me. In fact, that sounds like a pretty bad one. He’s more focused on seducing Eva and getting more scientific experience under his belt than saving the day.

For that reason, he was definitely never going to rank. I would also say Eva takes some guilt here for going along with this. Peter may be crazy but she doesn’t have to follow his lead. She could have just said no instead of letting herself get seduced immediately and going against her better judgment. It certainly didn’t go very well for her, that’s for sure. She was a big believer in the supernatural events going on so that’s even more reason why she should have taken a step back there.

Then we have Karl who isn’t as bad but he probably could have taken a harder stance in telling Peter to knock off his interest in the occult. I just can’t put a lot of blame on him because these are all adults so you have to trust in some common sense. Karl went about his life as normal and then once he found out about the threat, he got to work. He certainly felt more prepared than the other two and could at least talk with the cops without sounding crazy while the other two would phrase things in the craziest possible ways.

It’s a tried and true trope of the characters talking to the cops about monsters and actually thinking they will believe it. No shot, and I can’t even blame the cop there. It is a tough tale to swallow. As for the Baron, yeah he doesn’t have a ton of character or anything like that. He likes torturing people, that’s about the extent of personality that he has. He goes around wrecking everyone as much as possible. I guess he also seems to like Eva quite a bit so he has that trait as well which doesn’t really help matters.

You won’t be remembering this guy for very long. I suppose he is at least smart enough to be able to use a disguise and trick the heroes but that doesn’t take a whole lot of skill here tbh. Just about anyone would be able to pull the wool over these fighters! Even aside from the characters, the film had a bunch of issues though. For starters, I found it to be way too mean spirited. Since this guy’s whole thing is torture, he goes around torturing everyone.

All of the deaths are pretty brutal and the film comes across as rather mean spirited There isn’t much of a story beyond the carnage and even though the film’s runtime is fairly short, this will feel like a rather long experience. The movie actually could have been a bit better if the baron had pretended that he’d turned over a new leaf or something. That would have been far more interesting and then you would have an excuse for less violence in the meantime.

I suppose I’ll give the film credit for having some fairly good effects here. Everything is very practical and that can be a lost art at times. Meanwhile the script is fun enough with everyone talking all proper. It doesn’t make up for the writing of course as that is still a lost cause overall but at least that is a silver lining.

Overall, Baron Blood is definitely a film that I would advise you to avoid. In a way it almost feels like the original blueprint to a classic slasher film. The whole film is about the kills and the heroes being unable to do anything here as even they are captured and outmaneuvered. There aren’t any bright spots to raise the film up from the lower levels and you can do better with even the average horror film. Now that’s saying something since the whole genre tends to be on the lower side. That’s just how bad this film was. You can absolutely pull off a jerk main character but in that case I need a more satisfying ending for him. It felt like this guy wasn’t intended to be written like an antagonist, even though he absolutely was one. Never forget that the entire murder spree was 100% his fault. The Baron had been trapped by an immortal spell to suffer forever thanks to a witch and Peter ruined it just for kicks.

Overall 1/10

Hellboy Review


It’s definitely been a long while since I’ve seen his one. The original Hellboy film was definitely a fun one and it’s the kind of random superhero film that you don’t see too much of. It kind of just throws you into a pretty big universe of characters and demons running around without trying to smooth it over with the general audience. You either like what they are going for right away or you don’t. There isn’t a whole lot of in between there and that works for me.

The film starts off during World War II with the Nazis trying to open some kind of portal to summon demons. The heroes stop them but find that a small demon has already gone through. He seems harmless enough and so they take him in. The demon is dubbed Hellboy and many years later, has become one of the best fighters in the BPRD. He is essentially immortal or at least has a long life as well as natural super strength and defenses. It’s good to have him on the side of the heroes although there are skeptics that think he should not be there. Some just don’t trust demons.

Well, that is where John comes in. He’s been transferred to help out at this unit as well as be Hellboy’s sidekick. Hellboy isn’t thrilled about this and gets even more upset when Tom appears to begin getting a crush on Liz, the girl that Hellboy likes. Now we have a bit of a rivalry when there isn’t time for one. The Nazi who fell into the portal has been revived along with his main two associates. They intend to continue their plans and Hellboy may be the only person on the planet who can stop them. Is he up to the task?

Now the subplot with Hellboy being upset at John is probably meant in part to be a bit irrational but I actually found myself being on his side. John did see to be trying to make a play while Liz was distracted by her never ending grief and so it was good that Hellboy was there to (literally) throw a rock into those plans. Ultimately it did mean he was away from the base when the villains arrived, but I’m not confident that he would have arrived in time anyway.

Hellboy is a solid lead, someone who is always ready for danger. He definitely doesn’t fear any kind of a threat of challenge and has a lot of confidence in his abilities. Perhaps his confidence does actually outweigh his abilities at times but I will always take that over being underconfident. Hellboy is one of those old school fighters who does a lot of solid posturing while winning the fight. He even has a giant gun that is useless 99% of the time but he still brings it to every mission to fire off a few shots.

Liz is a character who is rather tragic because her flame abilities are incredibly powerful but she has next to no mastery over them. They can go off at any point and often destroy tons of civilians when these outbursts happen. I give the film props for not shying away from that. There’s no quick mention about how everyone evacuated at the last second. No, she’s brought whole buildings down and lots of people have died which is why she is worried now. Definitely very valid.

In a way it does feel like the agency could have handled the situation a lot better instead of just leaving her to her own devices. Ah well, I look forward to seeing her in a more confident state in the sequel. We also have Abe helping the others as the resident mental specialist of the group. Unfortunately he really can’t fight very well so any action scene inevitably leads to him getting absolutely crushed. He was really not prepared for these fighters. Seems like a nice enough guy but you could basically write him out of the film.

As for John, he’s okay. The guy isn’t the most helpful but he does try his best. I do think he was fishy around Liz but other than that he is a decent member to the group. He doesn’t act completely shocked about every little twist which I’m glad about since some humans really overplay their hand in these films. Even if you never knew that demons existed for example, as an FBI agent you should be able to bluff pretty well.

The villains were surprisingly solid here. Kroenen is an experienced assassin who fights with a short blade at all times. He takes out quite a number of fighters in this film and what makes him scary is how he essentially cannot die. He is functionally immortal and will just keep on getting back up over and over again. A super soldier who does not tire, yes that is a fantastic premise for a villain.

Then we have the Sammael creature which also has a hard time dying. It gives Hellboy a really tough fight here. Technically Hellboy tends to always be the underdog in these fights but his endurance keeps him alive long enough to mount a comeback. I liked the design for the creature. Rasputin is a little more on the generic side. Nothing particularly wrong with him but he really has a hard time standing out. He also didn’t plan things out well in the end to put it mildly. The girl who was helping him never really got a role either.

That leads us to the best character in the film, Tom. Tom is one of those guys who just can’t stand demons. There are no exceptions for him and of course that means he doesn’t like Hellboy either. He takes a lot of shots at the demon and makes his voice known. Although this does result in Tom having to run away with his tail between his legs on multiple occasions. He can talk as tough as he wants after all but at the end of the day he is still just a human. He ends up burying the hatchet with Hellboy later on though.

The effects for the film have aged well and I also enjoyed the fights. They could be rather lengthy at times and the pacing is always quick. The film has the characters dealing a lot of damage to each other but never goes too far or feels particularly graphic. For the most part it’s your standard action film kind of action right here.

Overall, Hellboy is a fun film. It’s the kind of movie that ends before you really know it. It has no concrete weaknesses and keeps on moving forward with a very balanced approach. I would definitely recommend it to anyone looking for a fun action film and the universe around it is fun enough where you may even be tempted to pick up a few of the comics. The romance can be a bit on the weaker side as there isn’t much time to develop it, but we’ll see how the sequel handles that. It’ll be difficult for the next villains to pass this group.

Overall 7/10

Bendy and the Dark Revival Review


It’s time for the next Bendy adventure. I actually beat this one a little while ago so this review has definitely been waiting. Bendy is one of those titles that is always intense and so it’s a good October type of game. It’s fairly short so you won’t be playing it for too long but there is a decent amount of replay value in trying to Platinum the title. You do not want to miss out on this one if you have not played it yet.

The game starts out by introducing us to the new main character. She was working the late shift when she notices just how abandoned the place is. The only one left is the janitor and he tends to act rather suspiciously. Unfortunately the two of them seem to be locked in the workplace now and monsters are appearing everywhere. Is she even still in the real world? There are a lot of questions to answer and no obvious clues in sight. The only rule here is to never let your guard down.

That’s why the heroine does come across as being rather naive or just unintelligent for a good chunk of the adventure. The way she acts just doesn’t make sense at times like listening to a guy who is obviously evil and falling for the most basic of traps. It’s one of those games where you’re basically pleading with the main character not to talk into the 10th trap in a row but there’s not a whole lot you can do about it. In general there always tends to be a lot of backseat driving in a horror title for any medium but I dare say this one was more extensive than usual. You’re just really wondering why she isn’t coming to terms with what is going on.

The gameplay is initially more of an inspection game. You walk around and click on things that are suspicious. As the game goes on you get a weapon and that’s when the core gameplay really changes. Now you’re bashing all of the enemies that come your way with a few exceptions that are immune to your weapon. There is actually a super weapon that can beat them but I never came across it in the playthrough. For the most part I think I did a pretty good job of getting almost all the collectibles but I still missed a few.

You want to use the vending machine as much as possible and constantly hit enemies with the shock pipe since both things help you accumulate trophies. The more stuff you do upfront, the less grinding you will have to do in the post game after all. Same with knocking out enemies from behind, if you get into one of the areas where they respawn forever, I would recommend taking advantage of that.

I would need to go back and get them for the Platinum but that requires beating the game at least 3 times so I would definitely want to space that out quite a bit. There is a form of quick travel in the game that you unlock at the very end but unfortunately it is one of the clunkiest ones that I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to find various sewers and each one takes you back to another location but there is no map and this gets confusing very quickly. I appreciate the attempt but it is something that the next game could improve upon.

The gameplay is smooth outside of that though. Also if you think the action takes you out of the experience, you can play on a higher difficulty where I hear attacking is not nearly as good of an option. Stealth is the name of the game there and that will probably feel a whole lot more like vintage Bendy. I personally like the combat as it turns the whole thing into a full action title but to each their own.

The graphics are really good and you can clearly tell the difference between this one and the last installment. The developers made the most out of the new tech and it also helps with the scares because of how realistic everything looks. There isn’t as much of a soundtrack but of course that’s by design. I would have liked some hard rock tunes of course but it works well enough with what they’re doing.

While the game length isn’t super long, there is enough here where you don’t feel bad about the purchase. You’ve got a pretty good amount of content to go through as it is. Meanwhile like I mentioned earlier there is a good amount of replay value with getting the trophies. The story is also compelling so this is definitely a perfect example of a game that is worth the money and will provide you with a fun experience. You really can’t go wrong here.

Overall, This is definitely a really fun game and one that I would recommend. Longtime Bendy fans will get even more out of it as I didn’t notice some of the guest stars or easter eggs that popped up. It has more combat than the first adventure so you really get to have fun taking out the enemies and progressing through the adventure. It has a good amount of difficulty as well so you won’t just be closing your eyes and progressing through the levels. You’re going to have to work for your victories here and I look forward to seeing what happens in the next story. There is certainly a lot more Bendy to experience!

Overall 7/10

Audrey Rose Review


This is one of those films that can only happen if all of the characters are as passive as possible. They are continually not standing up to the situation and so the things deteriorate. The film tends to be on the annoying side as several characters act really crazy but nobody really does anything about it. I wouldn’t have been surprised if Bill had completely crashed out in the courtroom because to an extent it would have been justified.

The film starts off by introducing us to Bill and Janice who live a normal life with their daughter Ivy. Unfortunately a weird man has been stalking them for a while now and they quickly realize that he is mainly stalking their daughter Ivy. One day Janice is in a car crash so this man named Hoover takes the chance to meet with Ivy and then has dinner with the parents. He explains that he thinks Ivy is the reincarnated soul of his own daughter who died in a tragic car accident and so he intends to keep on meeting with Ivy. Bill says this is crazy but the cops can’t help since nobody has been hurt yet. Unfortunately Janice thinks that Hoover may be right and so Bill will not have to find a way to stop Hoover while also watching out for his own wife.

Janice is easily the most annoying character here because of how quick she was to believe Hoover. He starts talking crazy for a few minutes and she immediately thinks that he may be on to something. We learn that Ivy has had crazy episodes on her birthday for a long time now and this would track with the date that Hoover’s daughter died but that’s still a rather big stretch to go through here. Janice immediately ignores how weird it was to have Hoover following her for so long and even invites him up to her apartment to help Ivy through one of the episodes.

Hoover is able to help Ivy each time but this feels like an awful big chance considering his intentions. Also just letting a crazy guy into your house is basically asking for trouble. Then even after Hoover kidnaps Ivy to go to his place, Janice is quick to side with him here. She completely betrays Bill in court and does seem willing to let Hoover keep the kid. She really closed off any chance for her and Bill to come to terms here. They were just way too far apart and she gave up her kid too quickly.

Janice is panicking for most of the film so she doesn’t always make a lot of sense but she made all of the mistakes possible. I’d also say that Ivy looks pretty bad here since she is soundly defeated by the spirit of the other girl. She seems to have no mental defenses here as she crawls into fire and burns herself at several points just because the other girl forced her to. Can Ivy not fight on her own? I get that in these possession type of films that always tends to be the case but it can be annoying. In this film the opponent is another girl who was around the same age. This should not be as hard as usual.

As for Hoover, well the guy seems nutty from the start. He drank the Kool-Aid real fast and then didn’t choose the best way to make an impression on the family. In this film the whole reincarnation thing appears to be true so then he should have found a better way to break the news. The way he did it would make anyone think he was insane. Honestly the best way to get close would be to own a nearby business or become a teacher but that isn’t as easy as it looks. So in that case, rent a nearby room and try to be a good neighbor. Or just meet up with the family and talk rather than stalking. It would have been hard to have made a worst first impression.

As for Bill, he definitely doesn’t plan to be very agreeable right from the start of the film but I don’t blame him. This is his daughter we’re talking about and Hoover effectively wants to take her away or be a second parent. No way he could let that fly. Hoover also continually refers to Ivy as Janice’s daughter as well as his and leaves Bill out of this. Unfortunately Bill isn’t very strong and easily loses to Hoover in every confrontation.

It was not a good look there and it was also crazy that Bill forgot his own apartment has a back entrance that is unlocked. I know it was a tense moment but how do you forget that? I was definitely rooting for Bill in the court case. Yeah a lot of weird stuff was going on and perhaps Bill could have handled some things better but on the whole he was doing what he could. He was prioritizing his daughter which is the only choice that makes sense in this situation.

The film doesn’t even have a satisfying ending so that definitely ensured that this was not going to be a very positive film. You’ve got a mostly annoying cast of characters with a kid who has absolutely no idea what was going on and then you couldn’t even stick the landing. This is definitely not a film that will stand the test of time as I would say it hasn’t even aged well up to this point. It’s not particularly scary either, just more on the annoying side.

Overall, This is a film that I would recommend skipping. On the whole I’ve never been all into possession films and this one is no exception. Not even the courtroom scene could save it, although I was glad that it was there. It was nice to see the rest of the world a bit although I would have liked to have seen what the jury made of all this. I like to think that they all thought Hoover was super crazy but Janice turning sides would have definitely hurt the situation quite a bit. It would have all been more interesting than the main plot. A good ending could have at least helped things out but ultimately there was to be no saving grace for this film.

Overall 3/10

And Soon The Darkness Review


It’s time for a film that really reminds you to follow common sense and to be careful when travelling in a strange land. There are all kinds of things that can go wrong when you’re in unfamiliar territory after all and that becomes apparent very quickly. Unfortunately the film is going to rather extreme methods to point this out and the film quickly ends up going for the low hanging fruit here. Certainly one relying on cheap tension to keep you at the edge of your seat and so that’s not going to be a winning strategy.

The movie starts by introducing us to Jane and Cathy who are biking across France. They don’t really speak much French but this seemed like a fun way to spend the holidays. Unfortunately Cathy wants to take a break in the middle of nowhere and the two were already off the beaten path. Jane points out what a terrible idea this is as it will be dark out pretty soon but Cathy doesn’t care and goes back to sleep. Jane is forced to go on without her and sure enough, Cathy vanishes and is presumed dead. Jane doesn’t want to give up on her but night is approaching soon and a mysterious guy keeps on following her. This feels like trouble.

I am going to blame Cathy for a lot of this right from the start because she was being completely unreasonable. You can’t just decide to go to sleep when the place is already dangerous. That doesn’t make any sense and she resists all of Jane’s efforts to make her get up. So when Jane eventually leaves I could not blame her because staying there would have just resulted in both of them being dead. Yeah leaving your friend is always rough but it’s not like Jane could physically force her to get up. That would be an even fight at best and then you have to drive both of them with the bikes.

Cathy also didn’t seem to have much of a sense for danger with how she was encouraging the weird stalker throughout the opening. You probably want to be keeping your distance at that point instead of thinking about how cool he looked. So yeah she played every part of this as badly as possible and definitely made Jane’s life a whole lot harder.

As for Jane, she was a good friend the whole time. She went out of her way to try and help Cathy by taking a lot of risks and doubling back to find her. Jane would have been all the way to safety immediately if she hadn’t had to go back. Jane also studied so she knows at least a little bit of French which helps out. It may not be enough to speak the language but she can tell when a translator is lying about what is going on at least. Ultimately she was much sharper about her surroundings and wouldn’t make anything easy for the villain.

As for the mysterious guy, Paul, well he definitely does a terrible job of trying to look normal. He tends to be very quiet for large parts of the film and when he speaks it is always to say something that just makes him look more suspicious. I can’t forget how he asked Jane if she wanted to search deep in the woods with him during their first real conversation. That’s something only a possible serial killer would say right? Throughout the film we learn about how he’s lying to her on several occasions and in the past another woman was murdered around this spot.

The film very much enjoys its misdirects and twists but does so in a very low effort way. Basically it makes people act very suspiciously and in ways that do not make sense in order to help trick the audience. So it’s basically cheating by that point and will have you shaking your head. There is a very small cast here so you’ll probably see through it pretty quickly but it doesn’t help make the experience any better.

Meanwhile of course the film would immediately not be satisfied with just murdering the heroes and so the threat is very quickly escalated into being more than that. So now as the audience you have to hope that even if Jean dies, at least it’s quick because the motive for the villain is going to be rough. It’s what I would call cheap tension here. The film isn’t confident that it can actually make you nervous on the basis of the writing or characters so it has to add on extra elements.

The villain gets away with a bit too much here and I definitely wouldn’t have minded missing out on the details. Even the climax of the film has to go on with this rather than just having a quick fight. Yeah this movie was definitely doomed and it’s a very dreary affair. There aren’t many lighthearted moments ere at all and the film’s pacing isn’t always great. They don’t translate any of the dialogue in order to help you experience how lost the main heroine is. I understand the goal here narratively but it also means there are just more scenes that are effectively gibberish.

The film will also probably hit harder for people who have ever been tempted to do something like this. Biking across the country as a way to explore the unknown does not interest me in the slightest. It’s not something I would ever want to do and even if it was guaranteed to be safe, it’s just not my cup of tea.

Overall, This is one of those films that definitely feels rather mean spirited. It’s definitely collecting all the things that can go wrong if you wander into the wrong area but you don’t really need a whole film about that. A simple disappearance or getting lost in an unknown territory could make for a good suspense film. Once you add in the threats of being assaulted by creeps and other elements like that, then it just feels like one of those cheap thrillers you might come across on TV. It’s not a film that is seriously trying to impress you with a good message or anything like that. I would definitely say to avoid this one as much as possible.

Overall 1/10

Cape Fear Review


It’s time for one of those films that makes you wish the main character was someone different. The whole film revolves around the main character not being willing to make the tough calls until it’s nearly too late whereas other leads could have ended this really early. The film even stacks the deck by having the lead be friends with the chief of police along with having a super long, clean record. Yeah there were definitely ways to avoid the fallout that ensues and I dare say it would have been a much better movie as well.

The film starts with Sam working on another case when an ex convict shows up. This guy’s name is Max and he’s pretty upset because Sam is the one who put him away for a long time a while back. Unfortunately, Max was let go after only 8 years due to good behavior. That’s not good news for Sam because this guy is completely unrepentant and wants to take his revenge. He basically tells Sam that he’s going to take down his wife and daughter. Sam has an easy out here, he could murder Max. However, doing so would tarnish his social reputation. So in that case…what can he do?

Well, the answer should be clear here, he’s gotta take this guy down. Sam knows that it’s no bluff since this guy was put away once already. It’s not like he’s just trying to scare Sam. So I would argue that Sam has a moral duty to go as far as he can in order to protect his family. This is a fairly seedy town to the point where there are gangs running around who can be hired to beat people up. So in that case you dispose of Max and cover it up along with the help of the locals, the cops, or just do it yourself and don’t tell anybody.

There are a lot of methods for this but the main point is that you can take care of the villain and hide the evidence. Sam is too worried about doing things by the book here and that just puts everyone in danger. Before the film is over Max gets at least two more victims and also really traumatizes both the daughter and the wife. Yes, he was stopped but it was at a really high cost and Sam cut things really close.

Sam did hire a gang to help out at one point but that was still the half hearted approach. I mean, he couldn’t have known that they would all be defeated but that’s why you gotta do the job personally. To their credit, the cops at least do as much as they can to protect Sam. There’s just going to be an obvious limit to what they can do here. Especially in an official capacity.

I would say Sam’s wife also comes across as looking very naive here. For a good chunk of the film she isn’t taking the situation quite as seriously like when she lost sight of the daughter or when she tells Sam that he better not even think of murdering Max. She’s acting like this isn’t life or death stakes and doesn’t really change her tune until the very end of the film. It was definitely more than a little annoying because this concerns her just as much as it does Sam. In some ways more since she is one of the active targets.

Naturally Max is one of those villains who isn’t made to be likable so pretty much any scene with that guy is going to be super annoying. He’s always very smug because his opponents are going to be pushovers here. He keeps on pushing Sam because he knows that nothing is going to happen and so you’re just waiting for the tides to turn but it takes a really long time to get to that point. You’ll be shaking your head the whole time.

Of course this kind of plot is always going to limit how good the film can be and unfortunately it takes the low road at each opportunity. If Max was just aiming to murder the family that would be one thing but he wants to do more than that and he has a history of it as well. He also gets another lady midway through the film and so he ends up getting away with way too much. That kind of Sword Art Online plot is always going to doom any movie with it. It means this film’s going to make for a very dreary watch the whole time.

It’s going for easy tension with the threats of what could happen which always comes at the expense of a good time. The fact that the villain gets as far as he does only serves to further hurt the experience. Additionally, the film wasn’t satisfied with just doing that and so of course we have to have the death of a dog in here as well. It’s just one of those things where you can immediately tell that this is the kind of film that will go there. The villain obviously has no qualms about it and unfortunately the heroes aren’t able to watch the dog at all times. So you have to watch as Sam doesn’t do anything about this because he’s legally stuck once again.

I know you wouldn’t have much of a film if he acted quickly but that would have made so much more sense. Even at the bar when Sam was being threatened, you could just shoot him there and explain that he was reaching for the gun or something. If there was ever a time to commit a crime, this would be it. You commit one to save your family and you have the knowledge that they will be safe. At the very least this film is a good example of what not to do if you’re ever in a situation like this. Sam also talks about how leaving isn’t an option but honestly if you aren’t going to fight, it’s worth a shot. This was in the days before advanced technology after all so you would have much better odds of vanishing than you would otherwise. It’s not the best strategy but it’s better than doing nothing right?

Overall, Cape Fear is definitely the kind of film I’d highly advise you to avoid at all costs. It goes out of its way to step into every cinematic pitfall possible and it doesn’t even have any real positives to fight against this. You probably can’t cobble together 10 minutes of happy moments because there is always the underlining threat that is looming. The heroes keep letting themselves be backed into a corner throughout the movie and the ending isn’t the most satisfying. Yeah one character is trying to get the ultimate win here but at the same time you can’t help but think that he will now have to be looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life. It’s not like that would have saved the film at all but I still would have enjoyed a more positive ending.

Overall 1/10

El Vampiro Negro Review


It’s time for one of those films where you’re desperately searching for a super heroic character the whole time but the cast continues to disappoint you. Even when there are children hanging in the balance, the characters cannot see past themselves and end up holding vital information. Yeah, you would not want to be in a city like that when a mass murderer is on the loose.

The film begins with a lady named Amalia noticing a mysterious man outside the window throwing a dead child’s body into the river. She panics and yells a lot but ultimately decides against telling the police. After all, that would get her involved in a whole mess and she can’t afford to have any controversies. She works at a questionable establishment after all and could lose custody of her child if the police were involved. We later find out that he is now known as The Black Vampire and is going on a murder spree as he only targets children. Can Bernard and the rest of the cops stop him?

Unfortunately Amalia does more than not telling the police, she actively lies and says that she saw nothing which only impedes the investigation. Bernard suspects that she is lying but there’s not a whole lot he can do about it. The cops lay out traps for this guy but he always manages to narrowly avoid them. The body count only rises from here and so the film is definitely a rather dreary one. The cops are simply too late for a while.

We do get the court trial scene which is actually how the film starts out. It definitely reminds you why a lot of people don’t take the insanity plea seriously. You can have a guy mass murdering kids but then pleading insanity? I just don’t see how that’s relevant, if he’s so crazy that he can’t help but constantly commit murders, then you have to put him out of his misery or it will only continue. Fortunately, the jury was ready but you can find it a bit absurd that a trial like this would even go to court.

Now at least you could have had the cops to root for but the movie goes out of its way to make Bernard unlikable. So his wife had an injury a while back so that she can no longer walk and she feels bad about this because he has really been keeping her out of his life. She does her best to help out but he just completely shuns her and tries to say that they’re as close as ever. It could have been a decent plot as perhaps she is imagining part of this and he’s also overcorrecting which is causing more issues. That would have been fine but instead we find out that he isn’t actually content.

The guy isn’t man enough to deal with the situation and attempts to blackmail Amalia into having an affair with him. That instantly makes him an absolutely despicable character and the issue is that the film had absolutely no reason to add this plot in. Maybe they were trying for some kind of parallel with the villain in that Bernard could not control himself? If that was the case then I have to say it was another absolute miss here. The film already had one big villain, we certainly didn’t need anymore.

Any villain who goes after kids is already spineless but the film also shows that by day the vampire cowers to everyone. He has to go after children because he’s basically terrified and outnumbered by the adults. He pays money just to stare at a lady since he doesn’t dare actually ask her out or do anything. She just laughs in his face and it traumatizes him further to the point where he goes back to attacking children. Definitely nothing to appreciate about this villain.

It was nice to see the homeless band together to help put a stop to him in the end but it definitely took a while to get there. For a film like this, it’s already at a disadvantage with bumping off kids since that is going a bit far for any film. It continues to fall back even further when you mix in the fact that the villain gets away with so much. If there were less victims and the heroes would stop him right away then that would have helped. Probably wouldn’t be enough to save the film or anything like that but it would be an improvement.

Really the best way to handle this would have been for it to have stayed in the courtroom. Have the characters describe what happened without showing us and then let the audience decide if the villain seems guilty or not. When you’re seeing the scenes in motion, there is no way to vote for anything but the death penalty. If it’s the prosecutor and defense arguing the whole time, perhaps it could open up the possibility that one of them is exaggerating or someone is lying a bit. Either way it would make things a bit more ambiguous and the film would also be more interesting since I love a good trial. It would fundamentally be a different movie though.

Overall, The Black Vampire is a pretty bad film. I’d say it just isn’t able to clear the hurdle of having both an unlikable main character and an unlikable villain. Throw in the film’s dreary atmosphere and you don’t have a winning combination. I suppose at least the soundtrack could be pretty decent here. A lot happier than you would expect though which could be a bit jarring at times. You would expect this film to have been really somber the whole time but instead you’re actually thrown a few happy tunes. Maybe that was the film trying to cut the tension in an odd way but yeah I’d say to skip this one.

Overall 3/10