West of the Divide Review


It’s time for a fairly short western this time around. Watching these old 1930s titles is pretty fun to see what would stick around for future generations of films and what wouldn’t. One thing’s for sure, the black and white camera doesn’t help make it any easier to differentiate the characters. For some reason they had the main duo and villain duo wearing similar hats and outfits. Ah well at least you can usually tell who is who based on what’s happening in the story but they sure could have made that a whole lot easier.

The movie has all of the classic corruption themes going around as one guy is trying to steal cattle and money from everyone else. A lady named Fay is even attacked for her money but fortunately Ted and his partner Dusty manage to get it back. This is a full on villain group they’re dealing with though so they decide to deceive the enemies into thinking that Ted is an unfamous murderer. Now he can be involved in the plans and find a way to make sure that Fay and her father are able to get out of this in one piece. Ted will need to really make sure that his gun skills are up to task though or this will be a very short adventure for him.

One difference compared to newer films is that there is a much bigger emphasis on fist fights over gun fights. Ted takes on different opponents as the film goes on and the battles tend to be rather close. He eats some really nasty shots during the course of the film which really puts him in a rough spot. I guess these villains actually train in hand to hand combat or maybe Ted’s just weak. We can’t rule that out either because his opponents didn’t exactly look to be in the best shape of their lives.

The important thing is that Ted wins in the end though and that’s what happens. He puts up a good fight each time and is definitely a strong competitor. Naturally he is unbeatable with a gun as well and looks pretty good in those fights. His partner Dusty is also a trusty sidekick. The guy doesn’t really get much action but he brings in the backup whenever they are needed so the guy has a key role. Additionally it’s just nice to have someone as support. The whole film would be way more difficult if Ted was all by himself.

Meanwhile the villains are fairly generic. There isn’t a lot to these guys, they just want to get rich and do it fast. They figure that might makes right and had been succeeding before Ted got there. Fay doesn’t do much as the main heroine to be honest but I guess there’s not really a lot that she could do at the time. It’s not like she was secretly great with a gun or anything like that.

Probably the most noticeable area where the film feels old is with the soundtrack and sound effects. When the music plays, there aren’t any real sound effects that can be played. It also seems like there is only one piece of music in the film so they just keep on reusing it for all of the action scenes and everything. Not a ton of variety to be found here. At least the music is good but it’s also the same one that was used in a previous film so I guess there weren’t many options back then. It’s not like this holds the film back but it gives you a greater appreciation for the future where there were a ton of tracks going on at all times.

The film also has time to throw in some twists which was surprising. For example we find out that Ted is related to someone which was unexpected. It definitely makes the situation more personal and it’s good that Ted stopped someone from beating the kid up. Ted would have done it anyway of course but it was a good example for the kid. The kid doesn’t look great here as he messes up his first horse ride but I suppose there wasn’t a whole lot that he could have done about that. At least the kid never complained or anything and was just doing his best the whole time.

Overall, West of the Divide is a good film. If you like westerns then you should get a nice kick out of this one. It is old and definitely feels dated but at the same time you can definitely say that it is a quality picture. It doesn’t really have any glaring weaknesses and the pacing is really good at all times. It is the kind of movie you can easily recommend to anybody passing by. The short runtime also makes it very accessible. It’s easy to see why people really enjoyed these short films back in the day.

Overall 7/10

Toy Soldiers Review

This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

When you watch films about how tough the bullies were back in school, you may sometimes wonder how they would fare against an actual threat. Well, this film isn’t quite about this as the main characters aren’t bullies but they are big time delinquents and this is their chance to do something big. They can save the school and really make everybody owe them. Do they really have what it takes though?

The film introduces us to the villains early on with Luis and his gang breaking in and causing some chaos. Luis didn’t realize that his father was already taken away though so he leaves. A long time passes by and this time he breaks into a school containing the sons of the most powerful people around. He aims to use them as hostages to get his father out of prison but the U.S. does not negotiate with terrorists. Will they break the rules on this one to save the kids or leave them be?

What the villains don’t realize is that this is Billy’s school. He’s been a delinquent for as long as he can remember and likes doing all kinds of pranks like taking the dean’s office and throwing everything outside or messing with the phones. Edward has decided not to expel him in each case though because he really wants to fix Billy. Billy’s already been expelled several times after all an Edward doesn’t want his school to just become another one of those. That said, when the terrorists invade the school, we may need some delinquents on hand.

Now you’re probably wondering how some random school kids can do anything in this situation and well…they do need a lot of plot armor. The film tries to balance the happy go lucky tone of a school film with the bleak moments when the terrorists are murdering people. It makes for a bit of an odd balance and this even affects the kids as they are pulling off crazy Home Alone type plans while in a fairly serious situation. So yeah realistically they would probably be blown away to Kingdom Come but the film lets them have their fun.

I’d say it ends up being a fun result at the very least. Yeah I wouldn’t take it too seriously so if you are looking for a very serious title then this one probably isn’t for you. The switching back and forth can be a bit jarring but I kind of get it since it’s hard to maintain the serious tone the whole time with the kids. Not impossible of course as others have done it but this one wasn’t quite ready for that.

Billy makes for a decent main character although I do think he is unreasonable for most of the film. There was really no reason to be acting up in school so much. We get a glimpse into his backstory enough to know that he’s not particularly close with any of his parents but for that reason he should be trying to make sure that he does well in school. This is his last bastion of peace after all. Once he’s out of here then it will get tricky. I know he’s just not looking ahead like that but he should be. He also loses his nerve later on in the film but gets the courage back when it counts.

There is a body count here so things don’t go great for everyone but for the most part the villains are taken down. One kid in particular who went down looked good before taking the loss. He was at least trying to do something and was ultimately just a bit too slow in the draw. I’ll take that over not even attempting to do something like most of the other kids here. Those could have used a real lesson in bravery and learning what to do next.

As for Edward, he was a fun adult here. Perhaps a bit too lenient at times but I do appreciate that he was trying to look out for the kids. He also works as the hype character in the film as he tries to tell the FBI that these aren’t your average kids. These delinquents don’t get scared or anything like that. That’s why it would have been fun if we could have seen more out of them. Ultimately there isn’t much time for the delinquent phase before the stakes go high.

As for the main villain Luis, he’s really solid as an antagonist. The guy has clear goals and well thought out plans at his disposal. Realistically he takes the win in most situations here. I did like how the fact that one of the kids was the son of a mafia boss actually played a role in the story here. It’s why Luis decided to let him go but then things went sideways right after that. The mafia gets their revenge rather quickly and we see just how much power they have. Luis may be a terrorist but he certainly doesn’t have the same level of reach and influence as an established Mafia. Not even close.

I appreciate the fact that the film actually had the government get involved but to be honest they look pretty weak here. They literally lose their entire 3 man sneak squad right they begin the infiltration. Yeah it was bad luck that wasn’t really their fault but still. These are supposed to be the professionals and they’re going down like that? No wonder the kids had to really take matters into their own hands. This is considering that the kids had earlier gotten them the full locations of where all the enemies where. If the kids had all seen that, they’d have definitely been a little irritated to say the least.

Overall, Toy Soldiers is a good film. I thought it was entertaining all the way through. Not saying it’s a great film or anything like that but I did think the premise itself was rather solid. While hostage films can be annoying at times as the heroes have their hands held behind their back in terms of what they can do, it’s fun once you reach the counter attack stage. Since the heroes are kids you shouldn’t be expecting a ton of fights or anything like that but at the same time we still do get our action moments. As long as you like a good action film then I think you will be enjoying yourself here. It’s what I would call a true popcorn flick for you to just turn your mind off and enjoy.

Overall 6/10

The Purple Rose of Cairo Review


It’s time for a movie that has an interesting premise but never really gets into it. The movie has some ideas but the whole thing is bogged down by a terrible romance. Ultimately the film’s humor style just didn’t work out so the whole thing ends up being a dud but I do appreciate the attempt. Sometimes these films just can’t score the big W and that’s just how it goes. I’d like a remake some day that’s more of a horror thriller about the real subplot going on here.

The movie introduces us to Cecilia who is a very unhappy person. She is married to a rather abusive guy who is always cheating on her and doesn’t bring in any money. He’s basically a deadbeat. Meanwhile she has a hard time concentrating on anything and keeps on messing up at her job until she is fired. Her only real place to be calm and have a good time is at the movie theater so she goes there to continually watch a film as much as possible. One day the main character Tom jumps out of the screen and announces that he’s in love with her. Cecilia is shocked by this but then the actor who plays the character (Gil) shows up and also says he likes her. She must now choose between these men but of course she is also still married an has to think about this. What can she do?

First off Cecilia looks really bad here. At the risk of sounding like victim blaming here, she really gets herself into constant trouble. Everything at the job was completely her fault. She was not focusing at all and was instead gossiping the entire time. That’s never going to be a good idea and will naturally get her into trouble. She kept on dropping things and getting the wrong order so yeah that was a bad look. Then with the husband this is easier said than done but she needed to actually leave him. You just can’t get past this many red flags in one guy. Cheating and abusive and broke? That’s just absolutely terrible and it sounds like he has been like this for a very long time so it’s not like this is recent either. Oh no this is definitely a bad look all the way.

Finally when he comes down to choosing Tom or his actor, Cecilia looks really bad and naive here. For starters, it’s not like Gil was subtle at all about wanting to force Tom back in the screen to save his acting career. So didn’t Cecilia think for a second it was odd that Gil suddenly started liking her? Almost like this would make Tom lose his hope and just settle back into the screen? Basically Cecilia was played here and so while it leads to a sad ending, it ultimately it a situation that she created once again.

Gil isn’t a nice guy but you don’t expect him to be. He’s one of those Hollywood hotshots who is basically doing whatever he likes and she should have seen through that way easier. As for Tom, the guy is super oblivious to everything and seems to be lacking in common sense but at least he tries his best. He was able to turn down a bunch of the sketchy women who were after him after all so I can give him some credit there. That whole scene lasted a bit too long though.

What you’re really interested in is the subplot of how Tom broke through the film screen. We find out that as soon as the film is digitized, the characters become real. They’re also all unique to the exact picture that is being played. So for example if you have 100 copies of the film, then there are 100 Toms. No character has ever left the movie before but it seems like it’s something that is possible if a character ever thought about it. We find out that this has started a bit of a revolt abroad to the point where people are pulling the movie.

The fact that all the characters are actually sentient is pretty crazy. They are also immortal as shown when Tom could not be hurt despite someone trying to beat him up. There are a whole lot of ramifications to this but the movie is mainly a comedy so the characters just laugh about it. It’s a shame because that was the most interesting part of the film with ease. The whole movie industry would suddenly become a lot more dangerous if the characters could just leap out of the screen like that. Additionally we see that real people can jump into the movies as well.

Unfortunately we end up having to go back to the romance plot. Putting everything else to the side for a moment, if Cecilia was actually a decisive person that would have helped out a lot. Like if she decided to be with Tom, then not giving Gil the time of day would have been good. Maybe making it official with her husband that they are through, etc. These are all steps that she should have taken and that would have been a really good idea. Instead she is just too scattered and starts rambling about random things all the time.

Her character is just way too weak willed throughout the movie and that’s the real problem here. Even before she gets suckered at the end of the film, she never really makes the right decisions. The writing in general isn’t great either. I did like the movie itself within the movie because there all of the dialogue was on point. In the present though, the characters were all a bit too extreme like Tom being oblivious, Cecilia being indecisive, her husband being whiny, etc. It’s not exactly the kind of writing that grips you.

Overall, This is not a movie I would recommend. Just like how Cecilia wastes money on movie tickets and popcorn every night despite being ultra broke, it would not be the wisest decision for you to watch this film. Check out a different romance title instead. There are plenty of much better ones out there after all and they will all steer you down a better path. This is the path you want to go, only if you want to see an interesting premise that is shoved to the side. There are few things more tragic than a great premise that is never explored.

Overall 4/10

Heavenly Sword Review


It’s time for a game with a really iconic cover but I admit that I completely forgot it existed for a while there. Heavenly Sword is one of those rare 3D beat em ups that isn’t a warriors title. I love the beat em up genre so this was definitely fun although the game is very short. So keep that in mind because you will have this game done in under 6 hours easy and there are no PS3 trophies in terms of replay value. The initial playthrough needs to be enough for you to get all your enjoyment in.

The game starts off in the climax with Nariko fighting off legions of warriors but the cursed blade is draining her life force. Her battle is at an end but then we cut back to 5 days earlier. Nariko always grew up as someone that everybody disliked and she wasn’t treated particularly well. People wanted a boy, not a girl. Well Nariko did her best to get strong either way and it turns out that she is the one destined to use the Heaven’s Sword. Now she will have to fight off the enemies for a people who don’t even respect her. She only has one friend in the world, a girl named Kai. Perhaps that will be all the inspiration that Nariko needs.

Honestly if Kai wasn’t around I would not blame Nariko if she just up and left. Even up through the end when she’s saving lives you still have the NPCs being rude for no reason. Nariko is basically a one woman army and without her the main fighters would have died out ages ago. The whole thing is just so absurd that you get annoyed when thinking about it. Her own father was tempted to murder her several times and just doesn’t seem like a good guy. I know the game tries to redeem him to an extent but it’s all just too late and he nearly convinces Kai not to help Nariko near the climax.

Kai is the only solid heroine here to help out. She may not be nearly as strong as Nariko but her bow and arrow skills are really good. While most of the gameplay is your classic 3D slasher, her levels are more motion based. You shoot arrows and then control them by tilting your controller to hit the soldiers from the opposing side. While I am not a fan of motion controls and this was the weakest point of the game, I did really like the concept they were going for here. An archer or any kind of sniper is always a huge asset on the battlefield because of how many people they can take out.

Due to the game’s war setting it’s fun to see her taking people out even while the main fights are occurring elsewhere. So that was pretty cool but of course the best part is playing as Nariko. You have light, normal, and heavy attacks. You switch them up to cancel the opponent’s moves and then keep attacking to land damage. It is like a game of rock paper scissors with the 3 elements and it can be tough to memorize them. The game has a lot more depth than the average beat em up. I was actually button mashing for a good chunk of time towards the end of the game because it was hard to land the hits perfectly.

My biggest piece of advice is to roll a lot because that allows you to get out of the line of fire and start some counter attacks. Especially with the final boss who has a huge health bar you need to do this. Any time he lands a hit on you, that’s going to set you back big time. So keep that in mind here. There is some motion control elements with the platforming but not too many. You also have a lot of quick time events which are fun but the timing is incredibly fast. I wasn’t able to react to almost any of those and just had to memorize them for the second run through. Fortunately there are constant check points in this game.

The graphics are definitely pretty solid. It’s going for a big of a realistic vibe but the effects have aged well. The characters do tend to look rather ugly though and while that is the point, I wouldn’t mind a more stylized version for a sequel. The soundtrack is also pretty solid. Nothing out of this world but it works well within what the game is trying to do. You can easily picture this being a movie so I’ll be curious to check that out at some point.

The story ends with some interesting directions they could go in although I would need them to undo one decision near the end of the game. You need certain characters to make this a success. I’m cool with a whole new cast of villains though as none of the bosses you fight in the game are particularly impressive. I enjoy them more for the banter than for their actual characters. I also give Nariko a lot of credit here for her own tough lines of dialogue which bring out the best in her opponents. The shadow bird is really our best hope of a big villain for a new game.

Overall, Heavenly Sword is a short game but it is a hype experience. So how much you enjoy the game will really come down to how well that balance works for you. If you don’t think that’s good enough then you may end up skipping it but at the same time the going price for it isn’t all that bad nowadays. So to me there isn’t really a downside anymore. I would also say the high quality of the hours that we do get is more than enough to keep you going here. The levels will even give you a reasonable challenge. So I’d definitely be hyped for a sequel.

Overall 8/10

I.Q. Review


It’s time for a romance film that has a fairly unique gimmick but at the same time it doesn’t feel like this actually changes the flow of the movie all that much. In fact, the movie would likely be about the same either way. Unfortunately it suffers from having a particularly weak romance and the characters aren’t really likable. When you’ve got an unlikable cast and the romance in a romance film is weak…well there’s not a whole lot more you can do about this. The film just ends up being doomed upon arrival.

The movie starts with introducing us to Catherine and James who are engaged to be married. It’s a rather big deal for them of course but their individual careers are also rather big. They aren’t really the romantic types but things just worked out. Well, one day their car breaks down and so they head to a mechanic’s shop to fix it. Unfortunately one of the workers there is a very unprofessional gentleman named Ed who immediately falls for Catherine and starts to bad mouth James. Ed has no sense of tact or anything like that and basically just does whatever he wants. Naturally Catherine isn’t overly fond of him so Ed works with her uncle Einstein to try and make a favorable impression. To do this, he pretends to suddenly be a genius who solved the problem of nuclear energy. Sure enough this does catch Catherine’s attention but the other problem here is that now the whole state of New Jersey is really hyped about this. Has he set himself up to fail?

The story itself is a classic of one person pretending to be somebody that they’re not in order to attract the other but of course it usually does equal out to being a bad romance. For starters this means the relationship will be starting off of a massive deception. You also have to factor in that she is already engaged here. Yes, the film tries to show us that James is a boring guy who doesn’t add a lot of spice to the world but at the same time it’s not like Catherine really signed up for a super romantic guy.

His one really bad scene was when he wouldn’t start having fun with her during the middle of a dinner engagement. It wasn’t the best time for that anyway but even so it’s not like she was actively trying to leave the relationship. So Ed going after her so hard was just a bad look. Make no mistake, he takes the bulk of the blame on this one. He really should have just kept on living his life and not pursuing her. I also think the way he did it just came across as being distasteful too because he immediately started bashing James. Not a very nice thing to do.

Ed’s just hard to root for and the guy is constantly annoying. Meanwhile I do have to dock some points for Catherine for entertaining this at all. Yeah this guy is super smart now but that doesn’t means he has to play along and entertain the guy. She is already taken and off the market, that’s really all that he needs to know. She needs to completely leave the current relationship first before any of this could happen so yeah she isn’t a solid character either.

Finally you have Einstein and his team who are supporting Ed the whole time. It’s not a good look for them either since they should have been respecting the fact that she was already in a committed relationship. It also would have been nice if Einstein was more supportive of Catherine in general like when she found an error in Ed’s work and Einstein played dumb to help the guy out. Einstein may be a genius but he was completely out of his depth here.

The film actually showed some good restraint in not making James out to be some terrible creep. Ultimately they settled for just making him boring which is fine. That’s certainly not a terrible quality particularly with it being so subjective. You automatically end up rooting for the guy. The real losers in this fight were the American people though. Everybody was so excited about being the first to have nuclear power. Even the President was ready to get involved and it was going to be a huge victory for New Jersey in general. Ed got everybody’s hopes up only to let them down afterwards. Just not a good moment for him at all.

I rather liked Catherine’s boss as a character because he’s really emotionally involved in what he does. The guy was really trying to get Catherine to find a way to help out the company and then after that he did their best. It’s why lying is always a bad approach because there will always be several victims involved. Ed never actually seems all that remorseful for what he did though. They definitely could have made things a little tougher for him.

In terms of the comedic aspects of the film, it’s okay. It’s not the funniest film out there but there are a decent amount of jokes running around. It’s one of those things where the jokes would work better if you really enjoyed the characters. I liked Ed’s boss though, the guy was trying to keep it real the whole time but would crumble when it was time to get famous. He told Ed that the whole thing was a bad idea from the start though so I have to give him credit there. Then you had the scientists feeding Ed the right answers during tests but the whole thing was so obvious that it mainly just makes the side characters look bad.

Overall, I.Q. is not one of the better films. I feel like the premise absolutely dooms it from the start. The worst part is that you could cut out her fiancé and almost nothing changes yet it would help the film out quite a bit. Ed would still be annoying but at least he wouldn’t feel like a bad character so that’s an immediate improvement. It’s a reminder of how even small plot elements can really change a whole lot of things. All it takes is one story element to really shut things down. If they ever do a remake of this film perhaps they could really improve it. I doubt it’ll return tho.

Overall 4/10

The Day the Earth Blew Up: A Looney Tunes Movie Review


Hey where’s Bugs Bunny??? That’s the first thing you’ll be asking yourself as you turn on the film and unfortunately he isn’t in this film. This one is really drilling down to a small character cast and it’s definitely a bold decision. I suppose you don’t have to always get the whole gang involved but it’s why this film doesn’t end up matching up against the bigger event films like Space Jam. I just don’t think the Looney Tunes are able to hold their film nearly as well as other comedy franchises and it’s because the banter isn’t quite on the same level. Then for visual humor Tom and Jerry tend to take the solid win. Still, this is a good film, it just doesn’t really have much in the way of replay value.

The film introduces us to Daffy and Porky who grew up together after being adopted by Farmer Jim. Daffy was always a really crazy kid who would get Porky into trouble while Porky was a lot more straight laced. They always got along though and helped each other out. In the present, Porky likes a girl named Petunia and so Daffy helps play wingman. He actually does a really good job of this and things are mainly looking good…except for the fact that they’re about to lose their house. It’s just too destructive and then a comet blew off the roof so there was no real hiding that. They only have a few days to fix this but that’s the least of their problems. The Earth itself is doomed with mysterious aliens showing up. Can Daffy and Porky save the day or are they just too green for the job?

Now if Bugs, Road Runner, and the others were around this would be easy but this is definitely a down to Earth squad. Maybe the plan would be to slowly introduce more and more of the Toons to build up to an Avengers moment of sorts. Although I would say in general this isn’t quite the tone that the film is going for. It’s definitely a comedy first and foremost even with all the danger around. The story is more about seeing if Daffy and Porky can keep their bond strong even amidst what is going on.

In that area, I would say Daffy ends up looking better. He doesn’t let anything shake him and stays the courageous figure that we all know. Yeah he does get into a lot of trouble and doesn’t think things through but he’s a genuine guy. It was disappointing when Porky tried to trick him into staying home and didn’t stay acting as a good friend. It was a bad look for Porky especially since Daffy had always been by his side. For that reason I can’t say that I liked Porky much at all here. It’s not like he’s ever been my favorite character or anything like that but surely he could have been better.

As for Petunia, she’s okay at best but can also be rather scatter brained. Not in a fun chaotic way like Daffy but more when it comes to science for her. When you see Looney Tunes you’re thinking of absolutely crazy characters so she could have stood to be more crazy the whole time. She’s still better than Farmer Jim though. I get the kind of gag they were going for here but all of his scenes did tend to drag a bit. The guy came off as more annoying than anything. Technically he’s a good guy just looking out for his kids but his scenes simply weren’t funny.

I can say that the animation is really good though. The characters look very vibrant and the movie is always moving at a quick pace. There is consistently a whole lot going on visually which is always good and the action scenes aren’t half bad. You do start to get tired of seeing the villains spitting out the gum constantly but that’s a side effect of the mind control. It’s not quite crude humor but getting into that feel. It takes the aura away from the scenes.

The writing’s not bad. We do have some good gags and I liked the scene after the credits. It’s not really the kind of script that is laugh out loud funny but it does depend on just how much you like the Looney Tunes. Longtime fans will likely have a blast even just off of the nostalgia. There’s a lot there to keep you going the whole time. The soundtrack doesn’t have any particularly remarkable tunes though so that’s too bad.

The movie does have a big plot twist involving the alien though. It may make you scratch your head a bit since it’s the kind of twist that makes some actions look sus in retrospect. That said, I applaud the film for adding that in. Ultimately the film covers a lot of ground in 90 minutes. It’s good harmless fun all the way through. I do think it was lacking a bit of a hook though as the plot is fairly simple and it just takes a while to get to the conclusion. I think you could have spent the film really trying to test the bond between Daffy and Porky more. Yeah that does end up happening but mainly it’s just because Porky is looking bad here. In a way it would probably have been easiest if they made Petunia evil and so she would have been tricking Porky the whole time. Of course at that point it is a very different movie so that’s definitely not a small change.

Overall, The Day The Earth Blew Up is a good film. It’s not one I’d really be tempted to watch and I’d say the average Looney Tunes episode is more fun though. This one just felt like it was taking itself too seriously at times. For a film like this you really need to go all out and not take small steps here and there. This should have been a lot crazier and more energetic. Maybe put in less of a real story and just more of the characters messing around. Eh…that could backfire though. Just saying “The film should have been funnier” isn’t particularly helpful either. Well I’d say to still check it out and see what you think. Since the movie is under 2 hours it’s not as if it’ll take too long to watch it anyway.

Overall 6/10

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny Review


It’s time for the final Indiana Jones film. I remember this one got a lot of attention when the trailers were coming out. To me it looked like it would be a fun film but I can’t say I’ve ever been super into the franchise. So I sorta just forgot about it for a while there but now after watching the rest of the films I was ready to check this one out. It’s a fun nostalgia sequel and I would put it right in the middle from the previous films. So it definitely does a lot of things right and it’s a really good way to close out the series.

The movie starts out with the best sequence in the entire film as Jones infiltrates a Nazi train and takes down a bunch of agents. He even manages to secure the Dial of Destiny. Many years pass and in the present, the main Nazi scientist has returned. He wants to use the Dial of Destiny in order to go back in time and change history in some major ways. He will need both Dials for this though and that won’t be easy. Additionally he has to contend with a lady named Helena has taken the dial for her own purposes. Well, basically she wants to be rich and now her ex boyfriend and his army is involved. All of these forces are fighting for the dial so Jones is forced to come out of retirement for one last journey. Can he still fight?

Right off the bat I can say the make or break point for this film will be how much you can still enjoy Indiana Jones here. For starters the guy is definitely really old and the film doesn’t try to trick you about this. He feels old the whole time as he can no longer handle the big adventures as much. The guy can still throw a solid punch and gets some running here but you’re not going to see any extended fight scenes. It’s probably why we had the opening flashback sequence. Also like I said that was the best part of the movie so they go through the peak rather quickly.

I appreciate that Jones still has a strong moral compass and is trying to help out even in his old age though. It’s certainly not an easy mission but he’s not complaining and is doing his best here. He’s been through a lot as we find out what happened to his son and his marriage. It does mean that a certain scene at the very end of the film doesn’t really work for me though. It’s just a bit too late and the whole song and dance has happened one too many times. At least that’s the way I see it. I would have ended the film a bit differently although it is still a satisfying journey all the way through.

The new heroine Helena is okay but she really does get them into a whole lot of trouble. She beats the heroine from the second film but definitely loses to any others. As a supporting character she just never really warmed up to me. Likewise I didn’t care for the thief kid here either. So Jones himself really has to carry the team which is hard since he’s not in his prime. We do have an extended car chase scene in the middle of the film and it was fun to see Jones pull out his skills there. If there’s one thing he’s always been really good at, it’s making snap decisions and outwitting everyone else.

The main villain is also a bit on the weak side although I think this is a bit intentional on the film’s part. He’s always very whiny and not particularly strong. He starts to get humiliated from his very first appearance and can’t even hold his own with Jones. The guy has to rely on his thugs the whole time and even then he panics near the end. He’s a very insecure genius and while he has his fun moments like when he’s confidently giving interviews, he never appears as a threat from a villain’s perspective.

The only main part where the film was disappointing is that we don’t get much time travel. With the premise I figured we’d be going to the past fairly early on but as the film ticks on you start to realize that this won’t be possible. At one point I thought we might not even see the past at all. That would have been a lot of fun though since time travel always has a lot of potential. I think the movie should have given lots of scenes for that and this is where they went wrong. The climax involves some really fun imagery and I could have used more of that.

One thing you can’t call the film is boring though. The adventure is pretty fast paced with a whole lot going on. You’ve got villains around every corner and having them infiltrate Jones’ school and start shooting people was intense. You do feel bad for his poor colleagues who got roped into this though. It’s why heroes hide their secret identities because then stuff like this happens. I do think they could have had security/the cops look a bit better during the initial chases though. You’d think a cop getting shot during a huge parade would warrant a much bigger call to arms across the city and get at least some more officers around. The villains never really have to answer for this and while the heroes left the country rather fast, it felt like something that wouldn’t just die out. I’d have liked to have seen the U.S. do a little more later on.

Overall, Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny is a pretty fun film. I give the writers serious kudos for having this film feel a whole lot like the older ones. It has the proper fun, action tone that you’d expect from these films. They did a great job on making the film feel very authentic the whole time. While Jones himself is definitely the most different since you’re used to seeing him on the front lines, everything else is as you’d expect it. It’s also fun to see how the cinematography and everything has changed over the years. When the film starts it immediately looks way clearer and more detailed than the previous films. Almost as if the graphics of real life itself have improved. Of course it could also just be a case of streaming making it look more grand or just the cameras that were used. Either way it made this feel like a true cinematic experience that stood above the other titles in the franchise in terms of scale. Although the original film continues to live on as the best one in the series.

Overall 7/10

Castlevania Dominus Collection Review


It’s time to look at the next Castlevania title. This collection brings 3 more main games as well as a revisited version of one of the classics. So you’ve got quite a lot of content in here, especially considering that the main games all allow you to play through them a second time with another character. Effectively a whole second story mode so that’s pretty crazy. It’s definitely one of the fun things about collections because you really get your money’s worth with them.

First up lets talk about the Order of Ecclesia. In this game you don’t play as one of the Belmonts and instead you are a spellcaster who is charged with absorbing 3 legendary spells inside her. If she can do this then she will prevent Dracula from coming back to murder everyone but she is betrayed by her good friend and gets amnesia. Now she has to regain all of her skills and get the spells but can she really stand a chance? It’s a very different kind of Castlevania game when it comes to the gameplay. You have to use a ton of spells and continually switch between them.

It’s a pretty interesting idea but one immediate drawback here is that because of how you actively need to switch abilities to use the new ones, you probably won’t even touch about half of them. Once you get the good abilities that you want then there is really no need to try out any of the others. They can be fun to switch around with but for the most part you just don’t need them. Still it does mean everyone’s playthrough will probably be a little different as you pick the play style that suits your needs the best.

The layout of the map is pretty smooth as you would expect and I also like the fact that they have little sub quests in the hub world. The missions are never anything that really puts you out of your way so it’s easy to complete a lot of them while exploring. It gives you extra incentive to look around thoroughly and the quests give you little rewards. I ended up completing a whole lot of them on my way to beating the game. As always I got the bad ending first but that also helps you appreciate the level of detail they put into the game. Putting in more than one ending definitely has to be difficult considering most titles don’t do that.

This is a very fun game and the story is engaging. Castlevania has really come a long way from the 2D platformer titles into the very iconic vania styled ones. As always I can also give the games a whole lot of credit for making this part fun as well. You really feel stronger as you absorb more abilities and level up. There are a few rooms that don’t appear on the map which feels like cheating to me but most of it makes a lot of sense as you just play through the game normally. The layouts are food and there are enough quick travel rooms to keep anything from being tedious.

Then we have Portrait of Ruin which is a little more traditional. You play as a guy who is distantly related to the Belmonts but has never been able to use the iconic whip. He’s still been able to defeat every vampire that he needed to though. Now he faces one of the most powerful vampires alive and may need some help. Will he be able to face up to his destiny and use the whip or will he fall? I also hadn’t been using the whip very often so this game definitely encourages you to do so. By the end of the game it ends up being one of the most powerful weapons even if you will probably be using the sword for most of the early game.

The game’s main difference from the last one is that there are a lot of little worlds instead of one big one. You jump into paintings which become their own worlds like Super Mario 64. It’s a fun idea and if anything it probably makes the game easier since all of the individual worlds are a lot smaller. The game also becomes a lot more linear this way since you very rarely have to go back to an old world. It is technically still a vania as there are optional power ups and such but don’t expect to get lost or anything.

It definitely makes things really calm the whole time. The bosses are all fun and getting good enough to beat them all is a real feat. This time you actually fight Dracula and Death as a combined tag team which made for a cool boss fight. I thought that was a really nice way to spice things up since that had never happened before. It’s a really smooth experience and it can hold its own as one of the stronger titles in the franchise. At this point it’s safe to say that the modern games all hold their own on a high level.

After that is Dawn of Sorrow which is a direct sequel to one of the prior games. Dracula is surprisingly still gone but a lady named Cecil has decided to work on destroying Soma so one of her proteges can become the new Dracula. Soma decides to stop her before she can hurt anyone but will he be able to resist the powers of darkness? The Belmont of this generation thinks this is definitely a bad idea and Alucard agrees but nobody is going to stop Soma. He figures this threat is too big to be ignored and must be dealt with effective immediately.

In this game you absorb the souls of enemies when you defeat them although it is part RNG. You have to defeat some enemies numerous times in order to absorb their soul while other ones will drop it on the first try. I didn’t really care about the souls initially but for the rue ending you have to absorb a specific three and this led to me having to enter and exit a room over and over and over as I farmed the same enemy until he dropped the soul. It actually took quite a bit longer than I expected so that surprised me. The actual final boss for the true ending is also quite difficult. I believe I went in rather under leveed which did not help. Still, those attacks were completely crazy. Dodging them is hard.

See, the final boss spams an infinite amount of minions at you while walking around the place. You have to destroy him in two different areas to win while not getting hit by anything else. Your best bet is to beat the minions as they come while also landing his on the weak points. Of course that’s way easier said than done. I recommend using Death’s scythe as your ongoing support attack since all of the weapons that it summons are enough to keep all of the foes busy at times. It doesn’t always work though, it’s a bit of give and take.

Finally you also have the arcade style remake. It’s a fairly short game with only 5-6 levels but this time you can’t rewind or use access points. The game does save what level you are on at least until you exit the game. So basically you gotta make sure you have a lot of time to invest and then do everything at once. If you can’t do that then it’s basically about time for you to throw in the towel. This is the one game I could not conquer.

The Castlevania games are really no walk in the park and beating it all without true save points would just be asking for a tad too much. With no way to grind EXP or anything, it forces you to try and just get really good. An admirable goal to be sure but one that would probably take too much time without much reward. For example there are no PS5 trophies for beating this one. I do aim to get the Platinum though as there are only 3 trophies left and apparently none of them are particularly long.

Of course the soundtrack is really good across the whole collection. All of the games sound really good and the graphics are also solid for all of the titles. These are all clearly well made games with solid fundamentals, stories, and gameplay. Now all we need is a big budget modern day PS5 title for the series and we would really be off to the races. There is just a lot of potential here and you have to assume that all of these collections are to build up hype for a new game. Hopefully that is the case at least.

Overall, This is a collection that was really fun to play through. I think that’s probably even the best word I would use for the collection. You really have a blast going through each title and exploring the maze. If every vania styled game was like this then I would be a huge fan of the genre. The level up system was handled very well and there is a whole lot of replay value to be found here. Whether you are a fan of the franchise or not you will definitely enjoy your stay here.

Overall 8/10

Xenoblade Chronicles X: Definitive Edition Review


It’s time for the next big Xenoblade adventure and I can definitely tell you that this is a real big one. Xenoblade X is a title with an even bigger hub world than Breath of the Wild and you can really feel the scale while you are running through the world. It would take ages and ages to run across the whole place. The story may take a little while to get going next to the other titles but it definitely gets really hype by the end. This is a game that you do not want to miss out on.

The general plot is that Earth was caught in the middle of a civil war between two alien factions which forces us to abandon the planet. After a long journey through space, we found a planet that could support us but the catch is that most people are still stuck in life pods across the world. Over 99% of humanity was wiped out but the survivors will be doing their best to hang in there. Will they be able to do this and find the remaining pods or will they be wiped out by the existing wildlife on the planet?

This new planet is home to many giant monsters. You’ll even see monsters level 80 and beyond right next to home base. So it’s safe to say that this is not the most hospitable place around. There are also other alien races running around. As the game goes on you gradually get some rather major twists. For the most part this tends to be an adventure game first and foremost though. The real plot doesn’t tend to start until the last chapter or two. It’s also why this definitive version comes in clutch because the new 3 part chapter they added has more story than the rest of the game combined.

We’re talking 20+ minute cutscenes over and over. The game reaches a whole cosmic level and we even get a ton of world building and exposition . We finally see how the game ties in with the first two and it’s just really interesting to see. I dare say if the plot was like this from the jump then it might be better able to hang with the first two. For the record this is an elite game either way but I would have to put it under the first two titles for now. Those are just a little too hard to defeat but it doesn’t take anything away from this one.

The graphics are really good here. The game definitely holds up well there, both with the actual action scenes and with the special effects within the gameplay. There are definitely no weaknesses there and of course the soundtrack is also really good. You have a number of lyrical tracks which are also a blast. Each one really makes you feel the gravity of the situation and it is also super rare to be having them play so often. You can expect a lyrical track for basically every boss fight and there is also an emotional one that plays for a whole lot of cutscenes. All in all it is really a great balance.

The gameplay is similar to your classic turn based system but has an active component to it. This will be familiar to Xenoblade fans but also plays like the original .Hack. Basically your character is always attacking with basic attacks but then you can use your energy meter to launch special moves as soon as they are ready. They will keep on replenishing as the battle goes on and of course you also have items and such. It’s a pretty well thought out game and you have the Overdrive mechanic which lets you use a ton of moves in quick succession for as long as it is active. That makes for a pretty good ace up your sleeve.

Near the end of the game you also get your mech suit which you can use to fly around and also fight in. It’s a pretty great change of pace because in this form you are absolutely broken. You can launch attacks that are many times stronger than in your human mode. You can also zoom around the hub world a lot faster. It was a good idea to keep it so late in the game of course because now there is no longer any ordinary exploration. If you want to go anywhere then you’ll just be flying which makes it all really easy.

It really helps you appreciate how grand the world is since you had to first run through all of the areas on foot before getting the mech and flying everywhere. If you had gotten the mech suit too early then it would have really defeated the adventurous spirit of the title. Additionally there are also so many collectibles and side quests to complete across the planet. I knocked out well over a hundred and there were still a ton of them left. The Xenoblade games are never a stranger to having a lot of content and this one was no exception. It really feels like the game does not have an end to it.

By the time you have completed the game there is still so much to do in terms of side quests. The characters all get a lot of personality here and the side missions still have voice acting for the affinity missions. The world gets so much screentime. If you’re ever going to make a lore game, Xenoblade X should definitely be your template. It’s also one of those games that is very intuitive so grinding and completing side missions is just a lot of fun. You are always making some kind of progress in the game so your time never feels wasted. It takes skilled developers to pull something like that off.

Overall, Xenoblade X is definitely a must play game. It’s also a very long one so expect to be spending around 50 hours or more here. You’re getting a whole lot of bang for your buck and there is a ton of replay value. It absolutely gets you hyped to go ahead and play the next games in the series since they’re all so phenomenal. If you don’t own this one yet then you definitely will want to change that as soon as possible.

Overall 9/10

ESWAT: City Under Siege Review


The Genesis adventures continue here as we get a more traditional 2D shooter. This is one of those games I had definitely not heard of before so it was pretty interesting to see what it is like. The graphics are good and the soundtrack is nice. I would say my only issue is how huge the main character is. That may sound like an odd issue but the problem is that it makes dodging any attack rather difficult. You are constantly on the defensive and a single hit will deal a whole lot of damage.

You start out as a basic guy with a gun but then in the middle levels you play as a guy in a mecha suit that can fly around with limited fuel. It’s a pretty fun way of adding onto the gameplay and not letting things get stale. You also have a whole lot of attack options while you are in the mech suit like rockets, a mega buster, fire blast, etc. I ended up going with the buster because to me it seems like easily the best weapon of the bunch. You can charge it up to fire really powerful blasts or just spam it like a normal gun.

The toughest boss in the game is a large drill that keeps on hopping around and you can only injure it at very precise moments. So being able to use the buster with its wide range was incredibly helpful. Without that it would have taken a lot longer to defeat. Each of the bosses were quite difficult though and I would say this is probably one of the harder Genesis games. You are constantly outnumbered by a large amount of opponents and if you let your guard down at all then you are in trouble. The game forces you to constantly be aware of what’s going on.

Additionally while the game is mainly a 2D platformer, it is not always linear. Sometimes you have to hit switches and go in doors to open new pathways. If you miss the right exit and go to an old area then you will have to do a lot more fighting because this is the kind of game where all enemies respawn immediately once they are off screen. Yes, it’s one of those so you do have to be extremely careful. The enemies can drop little potions that heal your health but they seem to be rare drops so fighting more enemies is often a net negative.

I like the sci-fi setting though. It makes for great level designs and I also like the music. It’s all got a proper sci-fi feel to it that just works really well. The graphics are solid as everything looks nice and this feels like a game that took advantage of the Genesis processing power. The game also has a proper ending cutscene with a lot going on. I think a modern remake of this game could be a lot more fun.

Ultimately the biggest thing to fix here is just the scaling of the main character. In this game he’s so tall that you tend to get hit even when you are crouching and there isn’t enough room to jump over a shot. You should never be in a position where your only hope it to shoot immediately because a counter is guaranteed to hit you. The game needs to work on that and that is really the only thing that held this one back. Of course a modern remake would also presumably have more of a story which can go a long way too. There’s probably no reason in particular why a remake would be made of this game but I’d definitely be in favor of it.

Overall, ESWAT is a good game. It’s the kind of title that always has a lot going on and so each level has your full attention. If you let your guard down for a moment then you end up paying dearly for it. That said, this nonstop measure of no room for error does mean that this isn’t exactly a relaxing game. It’s one of those full trials that is fun but you wouldn’t want to be playing it forever. So that’s what keeps it from being a bit higher on the scale. If you have the Switch Online then there is definitely no reason not to play it though.

Overall 6/10