Tag Archives: Horror

Christine Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

You may remember Christine as the bully from Carrie but the name is a coincidence. This car has been a demon for a very long time and is around to dish out the pain. The movie is about how corruption spreads fast and you have to be careful who you hang with or you could be in trouble. The main guy’s friend is annoying with how quickly he goes on the dark side though.

So the movie starts by introducing us to Arnie who has had a rough time of things. He gets picked on, has really strict parents, and just doesn’t have a high opinion of himself. Well, one day he finds a super beat up car that looks like it’s on its way to the scrapheap and decides to buy it from this shady old guy. His friend Dennis tries to convince Arnie not to do this but he does anyway. Miraculously Arnie is able to make this car look brand new and all of a sudden he has become an overconfident school delinquent. Dennis sees that Arnie is getting worse and worse but what can he do about it?

I’d say that Dennis is definitely put in a really tough spot here. There’s only so much that you can do as the best friend. He’s not family and it’s not like he’s an adult figure so his best bet is just trying to reason with Arnie as friends. Unfortunately that guy is so far off the deep end that it’s really tough to do so. Dennis is a stand-out character for trying so hard. Additionally, Dennis did risk his life in stepping in when the bullies had Arnie outnumbered 5 to 1 and disarmed the guy with the knife.

It was a great scene for him and he really didn’t lose faith in his friend until the end. Dennis really did everything he could. Meanwhile you can basically flip everything that I said for Dennis for Arnie. That guy was annoying on every front. Look, he definitely did have a tragic origin story, I can’t argue against that. The bullies scene was really rough and knowing that he has to go through things like that at school is tough. It’s also easy to see why he has so much self doubt.

The main issue is once he gets the car Christine and suddenly does a 180. If the car is going to mess with his mind, I’d like to see it be gradual so that we know Arnie is actually fighting. Instead the guy goes crazy almost immediately and starts taking this out on Leigh, his parents, and everyone around him. He stops being sympathetic real quick and at the end of the day he chose the car over everyone else. How much of that was mind control and how much of that was really him is the question that the film leaves you with.

It’s hard to say but I’m always big on willpower. If you didn’t produce then that’s game over. So Arnie letting himself be turned evil like that was just bad. Especially when he turns on Dennis who was always in his corner. Beating up on the bullies and taking them out? Yeah that’s rather intense but you definitely see how it could happen. Once he started driving crazy on the highway and acting hostile towards Dennis then things were really crazy. Likewise with taking such a hard stance with Leigh after she had nearly just died by choking in his car.

Arnie’s pretty bad but then I’d also say that Leigh should have completely cut ties with him after the first incident as well. Don’t go back to him after that no matter what he says. Following him into the garage led to another blow-up since the car was his top priority and even after that she’s trying to save him. Perhaps she was extra perceptive that it was the car messing him up but realistically that’s not the first thing that you would think of. She was rather easy on him.

Another character who suspected the car awful quickly was Rudolph. He’s a detective but a rather odd one. I don’t see how anybody could jump to the supernatural conclusion too quickly but this guy seemed to suspect it right away. He was asking a whole lot of questions about the car and how it was fixed so quickly but I’m not even sure what he was getting at. It felt like he had to be hinting that he knew the car was supernatural but that’s really a headscratcher. How he could possibly have jumped to that conclusion (Even if it was correct) is a bit beyond me there.

Props to him being a great detective I suppose. He was a nice character though and I would have liked to have seen more of him. As for Christine, well she’s evil from the jump so it’s not like you can reason with her. She gets jealous quickly and is always ready to exact lethal revenge. If she hadn’t gone after Leigh then you could have at least tried to paint her as a more sympathetic character trying to protect her owner but since she is possessive like that, then there’s no shot. Of course she did the same thing in the past to the previous owner’s family so she was just always like that. I’m cool with the film not going any further into the past because I think it actually makes things more scary to know that she was just randomly an evil, sentient car as opposed to some long backstory about how she turned out that way.

The film isn’t quite as violent as the average King title. The car does take some people out for sure but usually not in super gruesome ways. The violence at times is more implied than shown explicitly. One guy gets rammed to death for example but whereas in another film we would see every moment of that for a drawn out period of time, it’s not quite as intense here. Christine is in general a bit of a mean spirited film though with the average bullies running around and causing trouble. They really go all in by attacking a second time and then you have Arnie’s boss who is rude to everyone for no real reason.

The romance here is really on the weak side for obvious reasons. The relationship with Leigh and Arnie was never going to work out with him being on the dark side and all. I really hope the film wasn’t gunning towards a rebound later on but I’ll choose to believe it wasn’t since it ends pretty quick. I was expecting a different romance plot to continue but the other girl pretty much got completely written out after the opening scenes.

Overall, Christine isn’t really a fun film to watch but at least it’s fairly tame so I wouldn’t say that it’s too bad. There just aren’t very many happy moments and with Arnie being corrupted immediately, you can’t even root for him to really be saved by the end. If you really like evil cars then that might be enough to push it over the edge for you but otherwise I’d say to skip this one. Meanwhile one character nearly chokes to death here and it reminds me why I have to eat so slowly at Jumbo’s pizza. The cheese is so thick that I swear it’s a choking hazard so I always warn people about that when I recommend the place. Top 2 pizza in the whole world but definitely an intense one so don’t take big bites.

Overall 4/10

Carrie Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Carrie is a very well known movie. I’d wager that every horror fan has heard of it at some point or another and so you generally know the climax before actually watching it but the rest of the film is the adventure. Unfortunately I can safely say that this film is definitely not going to rank at all. Right from the start the movie begins on a low note and doesn’t really let up from there.

When a movie starts with an extended fanservice scene at the showers you know that you’re going to be in for a looooong ride. The whole first scene may introduce how Carrie was brought up in a way where she doesn’t know basic facts but it’s probably one of the worst ways to go about it. The bullies are everywhere and taking names as expected and you’re ready to move onto the next scene. Carrie was bullied so thoroughly here that she was traumatized and at home her abusive mother Margaret blames Carrie for this since Margaret has very crazy views on the world and sin.

Out of all the girls who messed with Carrie, the only one who feels bad about this is Sue and she wants to find a way to make it up to Carrie. So she has an idea, she’ll convince her boyfriend Tommy to take Carrie to the prom and pretend to like her. This will in theory get Carrie’s confidence up and allow her to make friends which will buffer the impact from Tommy leaving Carrie to go back to Sue afterwards. This plan is anything but full proof however it’s the best that she’s got and Tommy decides to roll with it. Little do they know that the main bully Christine also has plans of her own for the prom to try and wreck Carrie’s life once and for all.

The whole town is very mean spirited that’s for sure. The only two really decent characters here appear to be the teacher Miss Collins and Sue. Tommy’s okay as well I guess but very weak willed and probably should have said that the plan was not a good one. At the end of the day he just listens to Sue’s ideas without really throwing his own views into the mix and that was a big mistake. I didn’t think the plan was very well thought out at all because no matter what, someone is going to be feeling real bad by the time this is all over.

Lets dial it back though and first we’ll talk about what didn’t work for the film. Obviously the fanservice is the big issue right off the bat and destroys any momentum from the outset. Not to be stopped there though, the film even throws animal violence as the villains slaughter a bunch of pigs in order to get the blood they’ll need for the plan. It’s yet another edgy moment in what I would call a very edgy film. The movie didn’t even need to go that far because things were already really dire and a lot of other traps would have worked without the animal component.

Then we have the crazy mother where all of her scenes are definitely real sketchy. She’s always trying to drill fake lessons into Carrie’s head and mess with her further. It’s rough as Carrie is trying to do the right thing in not talking back to her but in the end that just results in her having to give in. Margaret’s just way too far gone at this point for anyone to help her out. Considering that Carrie has powers and is seemingly in control of them when she wants to be, Margaret is lucky that she’s still around at all.

We can’t forget about the bully Christine who is basically around just to try and make Carrie’s life as miserable as possible. I liked that the teacher actually stood up to her though. A lot of the time it seems like the bully gets away with everything but here Miss Collins actually took a swing at her and forces Christine to run off. It’s one of the rare times where the teacher actually got a complete victory over the student which is incredibly rare.

Billy is just as bad for going with the plan. I wouldn’t even say he was coerced into it, the guy was thrilled to help out. They had a very toxic relationship from the start that’s for sure. All of their scenes are painful as well and you’re waiting for them to get bumped off but they actually lasted a bit longer than you’d expect. In the end all of these bad characters and scenes add up to make for an awful movie though. You can’t really go back to back scenes without something bad happening. The film rarely gives you a chance to actually be happy.

Take Carrie for example, she is doing her best to have a fun life but you know that trouble is around every corner. I don’t blame her for saying no to the prom at first because in 99% of the cases she would be right that it was a trap. It actually wasn’t this time but it very well could have been and why put yourself in that position? Then Margaret was pressuring her from the other end so Carrie ended up going and the whole thing didn’t work out. Even in the brief moments in the party where she was having a good time, you knew that it couldn’t last.

Carrie was a good character though and I can see why she would blow up at the end though. After a while it was just too much. Too bad she couldn’t target only the villains though but by then her headspace was a little too cluttered. It’s ultimately what ended up turning her into more of a villain rather than ending things off with an anti-hero development. A part of me thought that Sue would end up turning into a traitor in the end so I’m glad that this didn’t happen. While I didn’t like the plan, at least she was trying to be helpful so I can give her that. Likewise for Tommy but then he loses all of those points when he actually does have an affair with Carrie.

He may be doing Sue a favor but cheating wasn’t included in that. He’s still her boyfriend after all so you can’t really cross that line without making things into an issue. Finally Miss Collins was definitely the best character here. She took charge and kept a level head. Considering that she was dealing with so many troublemakers, I’d say that she did a good job in keeping them all under control. By the end she may have made a mistake in how things were handled but from her pov it is easy to see how she would make that mistake. The party was really hectic and she couldn’t let any bullying go on over here. It was just game over there and she had a grisly end even though she tried being helpful.

They did a good job with the fire effects here. The climax felt like something out of a thriller film with explosions everywhere. The film also had a suitably ominous soundtrack going on for it. So on a technical level I can give the film some props there but at the end of the day it’s just too relentlessly depressing for all of the characters involved. The film would need a lot of clean up before I could say that it was ready to be a good film. Maybe throw in the government and some kind of subplot about tracking Carrie down and the origin of her powers. I wasn’t a big fan of the writing so you could also change large parts of the script and scale down Margaret’s scenes.

Overall, The cast here is very weak which mixed in with the rest of the film’s issues made this one an easy L. You’ll want to avoid it even if the film does have a fairly legendary reputation. There just isn’t a lot of fun to be had here. The whole town may not have been on Carrie’s side but ultimately there was nobody to rescue her from her home situation or help out at all so they may as well have been. Carrie really was all alone for most of the day and ultimately this ended up catching up to her.

Overall 1/10

Annabelle: Creation Review

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This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the movie. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Annabelle was so big that she got an origin story which is impressive since that doesn’t seem to happen very often unless you’re a really big character. I guess that fits the bill for her at this point though, she has earned that reputation. The film pretty much plays out as you would expect but in this case almost all of the characters are kids so there isn’t a whole lot that they can do against Annabelle. The film could have used a few more grown-ups to try and make the fights more interesting.

The movie starts with Samuel and Esther losing their kid Annabelle in a tragic hit by a car. Many years later they’ve decided to open up their home as a shelter for a bunch of kids who are homeless after the orphanage was removed. This group is led by Sister Charlotte and the place is quite large so they’re happy here. Samuel is rather withdrawn and his wife Esther never allows them to see or talk to her but…well it’s a place to live. The main problem is that strange things begin to happen here.

The main kid is Janice and she has a tough time walking due to illness so she has to use a cane everywhere. Naturally since you’re watching a horror film you know this puts her at a big disadvantage right out of the gate. She is told that the whole house is good to walk through except for one closed door. You are not to go in there under any circumstances but of course Janice does go in there and opens up the door which had been locking out the evil demon for a long time now. Annabelle is now on the loose and she wants to take over Janice’s body. Can this kid stop the demon or is it game over?

That’s the question which limits the film’s potential a bit when you think about it. Of course the kids can’t do anything against Annabelle. Even the adults are usually rather helpless against such a threat but with the kids it just feels a little too one sided. In general kids are rarely very interesting characters in film so I prefer when they take a back seat. Having them here 24/7 as the leads wasn’t the best idea if you ask me.

Most of the kids are also just annoying. You have the classic bullies who are mean to Janice because she can’t walk properly like they can. Janice only has one true friend in Linda but the others are as petty as possible and you can expect that they won’t be doing very well against Annabelle either. I at least liked Linda who had Janice’s back from the start. Her best moment is definitely when she decided to take charge and ran outside with the doll in order to throw it into the pit of no return. It was a brave thing for a kid to do and took a lot of guts considering the powers it had. Things almost got dicey for Linda since she sure was taking her time closing the lid but that was a good moment.

As for Sister Charlotte, she did well in what was a pretty lousy situation all around. There’s only so much she could do with the orphanage being destroyed and I’m sure it was a lot of work to find a suitable house that would work for everyone. The owners may not have been the best people around but at least they did have a place for the group. Charlotte also did her best to keep the kids in line, they just didn’t make it easy on her.

Samuel has to be one of the worst characters here and of course the same is true of Esther. They absolutely knew about the demon and yet they decided to open this place as a shelter? I don’t care if it was purified several times, the demon was still around which is why the door was closed. Allowing the kids into the building was negligent. If you absolutely wanted to atone and do good by the world, at least find a way to get the priests to completely destroy the building or the demon within the doll. Sealing it away isn’t actually removing the problem.

Then Samuel is also completely oblivious to what’s going on. I feel like it’s intentional but when Janice and the others start talking about weird things happening, he doesn’t seem to care. “Samuel, your wife visited us in the middle of the night!” “Gee, I don’t think so, she’s still in her room….” Samuel knows well and good that she was in the room which means that it was the demon or some kind of supernatural thing going on. By the time he’s actually ready to help it’s way too late. I also thought he was rather cold to the kids for no reason. If he’s still torn up about the past then perhaps inviting the orphanage was not a good idea.

Likewise, Esther is just hiding out in her room the whole time. You have to at least meet the kids, this just makes the experience a little creepy for them. The doll mask seemed to cover her face rather well so just use that and meet up with everyone. Otherwise she really isn’t doing anything to help the cause and is just holding the experience back. That said, I still wasn’t expecting her end to be quite so violent, Annabelle was not holding back here.

In general I wouldn’t say the film is super violent though. Moments of Annabelle shredding everyone is typically rare and the film has a ton of build up. Things don’t really start happening until it’s nearly time to end. We do get one barfing moment from the villain which is always a rather crude way to take possession. I prefer going with the smoke method personally or something like that.

We do get to connect this to the first ending in a way similar to Rogue One so that was interesting. Of course you feel bad for the new characters even if you do know what is going to ultimately happen to them. It’s the kind of twist ending you’re expecting though and even if you haven’t seen the first film it would work in that sense. I did like that we got to see more of Annabelle’s true demon form here though. It certainly looks intense and could probably hold its own movie in that form as well. Now that’s a figure that you wouldn’t want to have to fight.

The special effects in the film are pretty solid. There’s a lot going on and it’s always visually interesting. More so than the movie at times but that’s how it goes. It’s definitely one of those futile movies where the characters never have any shot at directly stopping the villain and just have to try and survive. I think the movie would be more interesting if the characters could be aged up so they could at least try thinking of plans. That’s a staple of the big horror movies even if the plans usually don’t work out. You at least want to see the characters trying some options but that doesn’t really happen here.

Overall, I thought this was a little better than the average horror film and the kids could have been worse. Linda gets a lot of props for actually trying to help out and take Annabelle down. Janice gets considerably less points here because it felt like she kept on adding to the trouble by going where she wasn’t supposed to and all that. You do feel bad for her since she can’t just run and escape the way most main characters could though. The film’s a slow burn but with kids as the focus it’s not as engaging as it could have been. I’d say this is a safe skip.

Overall 4/10

Carnival of Sinners Review

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This film has the original French title La Main du Diable and a more directly translated title but since this seems to be the main English title it’s known as, I figured I’d role with it. I haven’t seen too many French films but the ones that I’ve seen usually have very intriguing premises. This one is no exception as it’s effectively a take on Pandora’s Box and how greed will doom you right from the jump.

The movie starts with everyone enjoying a nice dinner at a hotel until they hear some shooting outside. Shortly afterwards a mysterious guy named Roland shows up and he’s missing an arm. The guy is rather defensive about it as well and he’s carrying a box. The guests all wonder what’s in it but don’t want to mess this guy and go about their business. A few cops even show up asking about a man in black before rushing off. Roland doesn’t seem to be the one they’re looking for but the whole thing is suspicious. Just then, darkness enshrouds the room and when it lifts, the box is gone and a few guests were attacked. They remand answers from Roland and he decides to tell them a very grant story.

See, Roland was a painter who wasn’t very talented at his craft. Despite this, he had a lot of confidence, so much so that he asked out a girl named Irene. Unfortunately she wasn’t thrilled with his paintings either and began to ridicule him quite cruelly. Roland was depressed but then the chef Melisse said that Roland could buy his magic box for a single penny. It would grant him all the skills he could ever need and make Roland a living legend. The whole deal was fishy and inside of the box was a moving hand but Roland was desperate and made the deal. Unfortunately it’s like a chain letter or a pyramid scheme and Roland was the last one.

He does get the talents and skills so that wasn’t false but he has to give the Devil his soul. The only way around that is to pay him the money back but it doubles each and every day. The Devil is also fully willing and able to cheat at this game in order to make things tougher for Roland. You can bet that this won’t be easy and Roland must hurry or all is lost. The plot itself is so unique that it takes a few paragraphs to really get it out there.

We can blame all of this on Roland though. He absolutely was aware of the main stakes in how fishy this was when he saw the moving hand. Also, why would this guy be so willing to sell the magic box for a penny if it was so good? It’s all so obvious and yet Roland still tries to go for this. It’s one of the biggest sucker moves that I’ve seen in a long while. You even have a guy named Angel telling Roland not to buy the box because it’s cursed but he doesn’t listen.

Roland makes a lot of bad choices throughout the film though like when he keeps going after Irene. She made it perfectly clear that she didn’t like him throughout the constant insults and was through with him. She only changes her mind after the box because now Roland is skilled and making a lot of money. Now that we’ve established that she’s only here for the money, you’d think that Roland would realize this but that doesn’t happen. He’s just so happy that she’s with him that he overlooks all of this. Then as the stress continues to grow he realizes that he made the wrong call but it’s way too late for that.

He lets his emotions run wild with him all the time and comes across as way too desperate. If he wants to be a great artist that’s fine but then he should not want to take any shortcuts. Where is the satisfaction if you are getting all of your skills from a box? It’s clearly not his own abilities so that should take away from the happiness. The worst part is that Roland has several opportunities to give the box back, the devil even gives him one chance to mess with the guy but of course Roland makes the wrong move either way.

The movie could not have made it any more obvious to Roland through a variety of characters that he was on the wrong path but he persisted anyway. This guy was extremely annoying the whole time. Then you have Irene who is definitely as mean as can be. I still found her less annoying than Roland though because he should have been the one to get out of there instead of just taking it the whole time. He was courting misfortune the whole way.

Likewise, Melisse was crooked in passing the buck onto Roland but Roland should not have fallen for it. Melisse just wanted to save his own skin at that point and he certainly succeeded. If you think about it, almost everyone is an antagonist here. Then you have the Devil who is obviously the biggest villain around. He is all about manipulation, the whole thing is just a game to him. Of course there is no way to beat him flat out as he has all kinds of powers while these characters are only human. The best way to win the game is not to play at all which is a lesson that Roland could have used. The Devil gets quite a bit of screen time as he mocks the lead and messes around a lot. I thought he made for a very intense villain.

The writing is on point and the pacing for the movie is good as it all goes by rather quickly. The only weak part here would be the romance and of course as a result, the main character as well. I also did miss the present time a bit. I know ultimately that was just a way to set up the flashback but the whole time I was ready to see what they’d think about all of this and how it would go. Unfortunately, by the time the movie goes back to the present it is almost over so there isn’t a lot of time for them. That’s why most of the film is set in the past which makes sense but another 15 minutes or so would have been really good.

Overall, Carnival of Sinners is a rather intense film. It’s mainly scary in the sense that the main character has to slowly come to the realization that he is doomed. He bit off more than he can chew. There aren’t big jump scares here or anything like that. The Devil is not fighting him mano a mano or summoning giant monsters. He’s winning with superior financial resources and a debt that keeps on growing. It’s a very unique way of putting despair in Roland’s heart. I’d recommend this film so long as you don’t mind watching a film with subtitles. (Unless you know French of course!)

Overall 7/10

Drag Me to Hell Review

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It’s time to take a look at the grossest horror film that I’ve ever seen. No, not the most violent, not the most scary and not the most exciting. The grossest, it gives the Garbage Pail Kids a run for its money with how much everyone’s throwing up and just splattering all over the place. Any good will the film built up is destroyed in an instant and this destroys what would otherwise be a very interesting film.

The film starts off with Hell taking out one kid and a lady swears revenge. You’ll be forgiven for forgetting this scene because the payoff takes forever and a day. You figure that this lady will be a main character but it doesn’t quite play out like that. It’s too bad because I think that would have been more interesting to see her show up and try to fight for a while. It would probably change the genre a bit but that was actually my expectation for a while there.

Instead we cut over to Christine where life is going rather well. She’s close to a promotion and just needs to defeat her rival Stu. Stu has decided to take the quick ladder through life so he’s trying to bribe the boss and also flex his superiority over Christine in front of the boss in the hopes that it will make him look more impressive. It’s a highly risky strategy since he isn’t even hiding the fact that he’s being a jerk. Low key I think the boss knows this and is just using both of them in order to make less work for himself. At the end of the day this plot isn’t super important but I actually thought the work dynamic was nice to have. It’s a little chance for downtime for Christine between supernatural incidents.

The main plot starts though when an old lady named Sylvia comes in and asks for a loan. She’s already gotten 2 loans from the bank and still doesn’t have the money so Christine makes the hard call of declining the request. Sylvia gets violent but is thrown out of the office. She later assaults Christine and then curses her before running off. Now Christine is doomed to fall to hell soon and starts to have a lot of creepy visions. Will she be able to escape the curse?

Lets tackle the elephant in the room here. Christine made the right choice. Yes, you do feel bad for Sylvia and Christine had the chance to give her another offer but this would have been the third time. We’re also shown that Sylvia isn’t the best person out there as she steals all of Christine’s candy and is generally not very hygienic. It seemed like the film was going out of its way to show how she wasn’t great. It’s left for the viewer to decide if this was the right move or not and I think it was. What makes my decision there even easier is how Sylvia attacks Christine afterwards.

This is not a stable person if she can’t handle being told No. She’s a psychopath here. I get why Christine feels guilty later on but once you make a decision then you’ve got to stand by it. I was surprised at how long the fight with Sylvia was in the car though. It’s a really extended fight scene that keeps on going and going for several rounds. There’s some good music and the fight itself would have been really cool if the film didn’t keep going for gross moments throughout.

Also, I think Christine should have won that fight a lot easier. C’mon, this is an old lady! Stop celebrating prematurely and just drive off or knock her out. Every time Christine lets her guard down, Sylvia just attacks her over and over again. It has to go down as one of the most embarrassing losses I’ve ever seen. How do you lose to an old lady whose teeth have already fallen out? That’s just crazy. I’ve heard about one horror film where a lady loses to an old man on life support who is crippled and stuck on a chair so that will take the cake if I ever watch it but in the meantime this is going to be hard to surpass.

It’s all surreal but if the film was trying to make this a scary scene then it didn’t work. In general the film is too busy being gross to be scary. So by gross, I’m talking about characters barfing, throwing up ooze, throwing up blood, blood coming out of food, etc. It’s just all so over the top that it’s crazy. The film isn’t even super violent for the most part but it’s gross enough where it’s almost the same effect in that it cripples the score right away. Man that just made me shake my head the whole time.

The worst part is that the music is actually pretty good here. The movie has a lot of tense themes and it almost sounds more like an action/comic book movie than a horror title. The film goes in hard with this but it’s all for naught because the film just can’t match this energy and intensity. A true shame if you ask me.

As a main character Christine is pretty solid though. Fighting skills aside, she’s a reasonably nice character who is doing her best to get through an impossible decision. She pulls out all of the stops in trying to break free from the curse and doesn’t crack too easily. I wouldn’t say that she made any really bad decisions here and in the end things just had a hard time of working out properly. When a character doesn’t make big mistakes I won’t blame them even if things don’t work out.

Then we have her boyfriend Clay and I actually liked the guy. He had some good banter with the fortune teller Rham and I liked how even though he was super skeptical, he did go with Christine to the shop. He had her back in every scene and never tried to tell her that she was crazy or anything like that. It’s clear that he didn’t believe in the supernatural but that didn’t stop him from throwing $10,000 at the psychic to help her. Clay was as supportive as he could be and I appreciated that.

As for Stu, the guy is so petty that it’s comical. I liked that the film actually gave him a role and a conclusion in the end. It’s easy to root against him the whole time and it was nice to have a human antagonist outside of the supernatural one. It was like a little comedic subplot but nothing too silly. Just a little levity in what’s otherwise a fairly serious film.

Rham also serves that role to an extent but his role is a lot smaller. The guy at least has good advice even if I thought he would take a more active role in helping out. Finally we have the main villain Sylvia and I can’t say that I have any sympathy for her. She’s just cruel especially with the lengths she goes with the curse. If she was truly a good person then she wouldn’t have reacted that way when the bank loan was turned down. It’s also quite extreme that she went after Christine rather than the boss for this. Of course it turns out that Christine had the final say but there’s no way she could have known that. Sylvia is very short sighted with her goals.

All horror movies with a few exceptions need to have a twist ending. As far as this one goes I’d say it was pretty solid. The end result is more or less what you expected but the path to getting there was really clever. I thought the twist was really solid. It can certainly be frustrating for some characters but that’s just how it goes. A sequel would be pretty interesting to try and go down to Hell to put an end to things but it’s unlikely. Most likely more characters would just end up getting bumped off instead but that would have potential.

The film just needs to stop with all the barfing and goo flying everywhere. Seriously if you take that out then the film would jump up several stars. It’s all completely unnecessary and doesn’t need to be there for a sequel at all. Stick to the jump scares of Sylvia’s ghost appearing everywhere and picking fights. I think the mini boss fights scattered throughout the movie would be pretty cool otherwise. Bonus points if the film plays actual boss music whenever she appears.

Overall, The concept and world building around the movie is actually rather good. There are a lot of times where you see a lot of potential here. The soundtrack is better than average and I thought the visuals were good here as well. I appreciated how Christine reacted to all of the attacks. She didn’t just panic every time and instead was ready to fight each and every time. That’s absolutely what I want to see from a main character. It’s a shame that she wasn’t stronger since she got dominated in most fights but the attempt is what counts. I highly advise avoiding this movie anyway though unless you have a reallllllllly high tolerance for the gross stuff. There’s even a certain scene with a fly that is rather stomach churning as well. There is absolutely 0 replay value to the film because of this as well and if I’m eating dinner as the film goes on TV I’m switching channels immediately!

Overall 2/10

Update 10/12/2022: Wait a minute, I’d completely forgotten about the scene with Christine and the cat. With that in mind I must retract the positives I said about her earlier. This was definitely a moment of crossing the line and negates her being a good character. In fact, it makes the ending a lot more fitting because it’s not a crime that you can just walk away from. It’s also a bad look for the film in general because it adds animal violence to its list of negatives. Totally spaced on that moment but yeah it was definitely a bad scene. I must have tried to block it out!

Blair Witch Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for the return of the Blair Witch! The first film was fairly bad, I wouldn’t put it in the same level as a slasher or anything but the shaky cam wasn’t doing it for me and the characters were annoying. This one is fairly similar to the point where you could almost call it the same movie. It’s continuing the story at least so that’s a start but the characters are still super annoying and there is at least one extra mistake here that I thought was crazy.

The movie starts off with James deciding to go to the Blair Witch’s domain to try and find his sister Heather. She’s the one who got bumped off back in the first film but he figures there is still a chance that she is around based on a very low pixel Youtube video that came up. He gets his friend Peter and Peter’s girlfriend to come along along with Lisa from school. They track down the pair who uploaded the Youtube video and they agree to help but only if they can come along. James reluctantly allows this to Lane takes them straight to where they took the video. From there things start to get dicey though as mysterious dolls appear and there seems to be no way to escape. Have James and friends already been taken out by the Blair Witch??

As always there is a lot of shaky cam here since the group can’t get their act together when they start running in the climax. Otherwise they have a lot of angles this time so things keep switching up but I’ll always prefer a real camera to the hand-camera style. It’s a little harder to really focus like this and it’s like the screen is always moving. Personally I think this is never the way to go and is probably the worst camera technique. Even if you want people to think that this actually happened, it doesn’t work. In fact, it works even less than the original because like I said, they’re switching devices constantly.

So when people found the tapes….they managed to find every single tape? They even got the drone tape to get that footage. I mean by this point I don’t think they’re expecting people to think it’s real so it may just be for tradition but I don’t think this was a good idea. Just admit that it’s fake from the start and lets use that as the baseline. Either way the film wouldn’t be going very far without better characters though.

The only reasonable one throughout is probably James. He is at least trying to save his sister and has good motives even if the plan is probably not a good idea. It’s not until we’re late in the game where it feels like he is weakening a lot like running off because he hears voices. It’s nice to assume that he is mind controlled because otherwise he just looks awful in this moment. You don’t just run off like that.

Then we have Peter who was also good here. He was against Talia and Lane joining the group and I agreed with him on that. Nothing good could come from having those two join the party. You’re allowing strangers who are quite shady to join the party just like that? No, I don’t think that was a good idea at all. Look, you’re already going to bat against possible supernatural forces but now you’re sleeping alongside two strangers? Anything weird that happens could now be them instead of the Blair Witch.

You also have to stay on guard all night in case they try anything or turn out to be psychos. Surprisingly the characters don’t take any extra precautions or anything like that which was a little surprising but it was still a bad move. I had a hard time getting past that decision. Sure, it’s good that they can show you the location of where they got the picture but it’s not worth all of the added danger here.

Ashley does her best throughout this as well but she definitely has it really rough the whole time. I would argue that the film is harder on her than anyone else because she gets a big cut at one point and then this gets worse and worse as there are organisms inside of her and it’s all really painful. It’s also rather gross and violent so they could have cut that plot out completely. Also, why did they take their shoes off to go into the river? That seemed like a really bad idea to me. Forget about the sharks but even bacteria and anything else that could be in the water is probably not a good idea to mess with. Shoes can’t stop everything but it at least offers you a little extra protection and I’ll take what I can get.

As for Lisa, she started off on the wrong foot from the start when Peter nicely asked if she wouldn’t use the footage for her documentary since it was very personal and traumatic but she said no because she needed the film. I knew at that point that this would be her priority and she did stay quite close to the camera the whole time. She wasn’t as unreasonable as the heroine in the first film but she didn’t do the group any favors in terms of morale here. Lisa did last a while in not looking back at least but at the end made a rookie move. I don’t get why you’d look back at that point in the game.

Talia and Lane are just annoying the whole time. They’re unreasonable and cause a ton of trouble just like I said they would. Seriously they hold the main group back so much and without them things would have been way easier. Of course it’s still tragic as you know things won’t go well for them but it would have been nice if they didn’t have to make it so easy on the Blair Witch. At least be good team players or something right?

The movie is more of an atmospheric horror for the most part so it doesn’t get too violent aside from Ashley’s cut. That said, we do get a bit more action than in the first one. One character completely cracks and decides to help the Blair Witch so we get a little scuffle there. Then you also have the Blair Witch herself running around. So personally I think she’s an alien at this point. We get a quick shot of her as she runs around and she looks like a classic alien type design. It’s a very short moment of course but that’s my first thought.

Then later on she seemed to have summoned a UFO. It’s all pretty crazy and intentionally vague but I’m glad the film gave us a little more to chew on at least. It would just be nice if the humans could fight back a little more at least. Not much they can do about the loops and reality warping but once they’re in the house I’d like to see a little more fight out of them. Again, it would help if we had a standard camera instead of having to watch them spin around the whole time. There’s a lot of yelling and panicking but not a lot of strategy. It’s a tense situation of course but it doesn’t make for a lot of entertainment.

Overall, Blair Witch is a very repetitive film. You really feel like it’s the first movie all over again right down to the characters and setting. The climax also plays out very similarly with a few different changes thrown in there but the same result. You can do a lot better with horror movies and this one still doesn’t feel like it has much of a point, not yet at least. If they make another Blair Witch film, it’s time to go with a traditional camera this time around. Also, lets get a better character cast this time.

Overall 3/10

Trilogy of Terror Review

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Now this is more like what I would expect from a horror anthology. None of the 3 stories are particularly good and so from the start you don’t think that this one is really going to make a name for itself or surpass its limits. It’s just falling flat and in at least one of the shorts you can guess the twist right away. Lets break each of the stories down though.

The first story follows a villain named Chad who begins to like Julie, one of his teachers. He figures that nothing will stop their being together and while she warns him that they cannot be together, he figures that he can win her over. From blackmail to kidnapping and spiking the drinks, Chad will do any and everything in order to get her. Fortunately as a horror segment you figure there will be a twist here because if played straight this could have easily earned the film a 0 right off the bat. It goes rather far and the twist turns the tables but the whole segment still seems to be in rather bad taste.

Rule number 1 of having a villain as the main character is that you need to give him some decent goals and make sure that the guy isn’t just a random creep. If he is then why are we following the guy? It’s a good way to just make sure that the whole segment will hurt as a result and that’s exactly what happens here. All of his scenes are just annoying to watch and the segment really drags on through to the end. As for the twist, that part was good at least. It’s really the only kind of twist that could have saved the segment somewhat. It’s relative but at least it kept this one from being all the way at the bottom.

Then we have the second story where Millicent is jealous of her sister Therese who seems to be a total rebel. Millicent plays things by the book but she has had to watch as Therese has ruined her life in every way possible. Millicent doesn’t know what to do at this point to try and get out of this situation and figures that she may have to go in a rather drastic direction. There’s a doctor that she speaks to over the phone but he isn’t of much help. Therese will usually corner him when the guy shows up so he has to beat a hasty retreat.

This is the one where I’d say you will guess the twist right away. Mainly due to how it’s all presented but I won’t give that away. Still, it’s another really bad segment. There isn’t even a whole lot of horror to this one. It’s more of a disturbing segment as we get all the exposition on what Therese has done over and over again. She has a way of corrupting people and unfortunately everyone has really weak willpower so they are never able to stop her. That’s certainly unfortunate because you’d like to think that everyone wouldn’t just crack so easily. Maybe if the doctor got to appear more and land some wins that would have been good but instead this segment is really an eye roller. I think they could have toned down Therese’s colorful history a bit and styled this more as a quick thriller with the doctor trying to quickly save her and we get a battle of wits there. That’s not what the segment was going for but it would have been an improvement.

The final segment has Amelia talking with her mother on the phone and deciding not to meet up this time. Her mother is quite upset at this since they had a family tradition going but Amelia doesn’t have too much time to worry about this because a random Zuni doll shows up and suddenly becomes alive. It looks very disturbing as it has a lot of sharp teeth and carries a spear around. It’s small but quite fast. Amelia will have to try and destroy this doll somehow but it won’t be easy. The doll has more combat experience and has incredible durability.

So the first thing we’re considering here is that Amelia has to play the matchup right. What I mean by that is Zuni has a few advantages but so does she. In a close quarters battle she should be able to defeat Zuni due to her better lifting strength and raw power. If she can knock him out of a window that will be game over. Additionally if she can disarm him from using the spear then she has knocked out most of his attack options. All she has to watch out for is the bite. In terms of speed, the doll is incredibly fast in short bursts but realistically can’t catch up to her otherwise so that’s when the planning should get involved.

Amelia’s win condition is to trap Zuni or ring him out by getting him off the battlefield. Unfortunately that’s what makes this segment annoying as she has multiple opportunities to take him out but squanders them. Every time she grabs the spear I wait for her to throw it out the window, put it in the oven, flush it down the toilet, do something! Instead she always leaves it on the ground which is an absolutely massive mistake since Zuni grabs it each time.

When Zuni starts to bite her I figured that would be it since with how sharp his teeth are, that felt like a game over. Somehow she tanked that and then gets him into a box. Okay, now we’re cooking with gas! Once Zuni is in the box she can hurl it out the window, down the steps, put it in more boxes to lair it, etc. Or if you have to, just take the time to escape by running out of the room. Instead…she just sorta panics and watches as it starts to cut its way out of the box since she let him get the spear again.

The final part where she makes a big mistake is she finally gets him in the oven. Keep the oven closed!! Look, she has already seen that it can breath underwater and that it has tanked many lethal hits at this point. So why are you opening the oven door? Keep it baking in there for hours as needed but there’s no rush to open the oven and why not make sure that the job is done? Realistically this probably wouldn’t have worked since Zuni is massively overpowered but at least you won’t be losing directly and put the burden on him to find a way out. Amelia played the matchup all wrong throughout the whole segment. At least we did have some action though but the segment could get a little bloody and more violent than it needed to be.

So that’s the Trilogy of Terror. Definitely a title that I would recommend avoiding. For the most part I wouldn’t even call the segments pure horror but more on the disturbing side. The first segment is certainly meant to be as disturbing as possible and I would say the second fits into that category as well. It’s only the third one that is actually going for a horror vibe as it’s a life or death battle against a supernatural entity. That’s something that can make you feel the fear but the others are relying more on shock value which is never a good crutch to use.

Overall, You can do a lot better than this movie. The writing isn’t very good and none of the stories are particularly solid either. The final story is the best one by default but it’s not exactly a high bar and wins by default aren’t the most impressive ones out there. It looks like it may be some time before we get another quality horror anthology as most of them turn out like this one but we’ll see. There could always be some hidden gems in the rough out there.

Overall 2/10

Dead of Night Review

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A horror anthology that’s actually good? Yes, this one was able to surpass its limits and actually turned out to be one of the better horror films that I’ve seen as of late. The stories were solid for the most part and the main plot that was keeping them together was also solid. Throw in a little mystery/intrigue and I was really sold on this one. Check this one out if you want a quality horror movie to watch.

The movie starts with Walter driving up to a house where he will was invited by the head to do an inspection. For some reason the place looks familiar and what’s worse is that he recognizes everyone who is at the house despite never meeting them before. Walter feels like he has gone through this already but his memories are mostly foggy. What he does remember for sure is that something evil is about to happen here and that’s enough to really scare him quite thoroughly. The rest of the guests don’t really believe him but then start to talk about supernatural stories of their own. Can Walter remember what is about to happen or will it all be too late?

Walter probably should have dashed out but it’s always rough when your own memories aren’t working properly. He’s an interesting main character though. Walter may not have the strongest will or be the most dynamic character but one thing’s for sure, he is super scared the whole time. That’s one aspect of his character that can always be annoying though. Like okay, we get that he is super scared and unsure of what to do but there comes time where he just needs to man up eventually. Instead by being on the defensive he is really ensuring that nobody is all that safe. At any time things can change and the evil that he senses will be upon them.

Well, lets go to the first story. So Hugh remembers a time where he saw this mysterious guy who asked if he wanted to get on a bus. Hugh was convinced that this was some kind of specter or personification of Death and that going with him would have been his doom. So Hugh decides not to get on board and the bus promptly crashes so everybody dies. Clearly it was good that he didn’t get on the bus but of course the others are doubtful or think that it could have been coincidence.

It was a quick story and one that was fairly low key but I thought it was pretty good. Sometimes a little atmospheric story like this can really get the message across quite nicely and doesn’t need a long run time. They accomplished everything that was needed here and it’s one of the better stories. Probably the second best one for me personally. The next story is a bit longer. So Sally was at an orphanage with a bunch of other kids and so they decided to play hide and seek. Sally found a really good spot but it actually led to a room where she got to meet a kid who was all by his lonesome.

Sally figured he got lost from the pack or just lived there but when she went back downstairs she found out that he had died a very long time ago. Had she been talking to a ghost? It’s one of those stories that is odd so of course she was worried but technically there wasn’t a lot of danger there or anything. So she was fairly safe either way. I thought this story maybe went on a little too long and one of the kids was annoying the whole time. Sally was good though and playing hide and seek in a big house definitely seems risky because it can be hard to find someone after a while. It’s definitely a game that’s easier to play in a small hut even if it’s less exciting.

Now we get to the most dangerous one. So one day Joan got a mirror and Peter thought it was okay at first but then he notices that the reflection is of a different room entirely. He can’t even see Joan there when she stands next to him. The more he looks into the mirror, the more he starts to get possessed by it. Peter’s willpower is easily overpowered by the mirror and it just seems like he doesn’t really stand a chance here. No matter what he does, he weakens and the mirror makes you relive the life of the original owner who ended up strangling the wife so that gets tricky for Joan. She just barely smashes it in time.

This story was actually a matter of life and death which separated it from some of the others. That said, I would say that it makes Paul look really bad since he was not able to escape its gaze. You’re basically telling me that he lost to a mirror. He should have broken that thing ages ago especially when he knew that Joan was leaving for a while and he could never beat it 1 on 1. She should have also broken it after the first few incidents even if Paul thought they would be okay. They got way too lax about the whole thing and it nearly cost them. It’s a bit weaker than some of the other stories but still decent.

Now we’re on the best story which involves golfing. So George and Larry are both madly in love with this one girl so they decide to settle everything with a game of golf. George wins so Larry drowns himself but later on Larry realizes that George cheated. Now Larry is determined to haunt George until he makes things right. George feels a bit guilty so he asks Larry what he can do but the demands are steep. Larry wants George to give up his wife and to never play Golf again. George isn’t gonna do that and so things continue to escalate.

This one may feel more comedic in nature compared to some of the other stores but I thought it worked out pretty well. I liked the whole idea of using golf to settle things and then Larry just casually appearing as a ghost was intense as well. That said, the heroine probably should have just picked one instead of letting herself be used as a prize. Usually you never want to just be the prize right? You want to be the one in control. It was a fun story with how absurd the whole thing was.

Finally we have the story with the dummy. So Maxwell has a dummy that he uses for the shows named Hugo but he seems to have a mind of his own. Hugo even keeps threatening to leave Maxwell for another performer. Maxwell gets mad at the other guy instead of Hugo which was my main issue with the whole thing. Just take Hugo out if he’s messing with you but why are you taking it out on the other guys? Maxwell is clearly unstable the whole time too so I can see why people wouldn’t suspect Hugo. The ending is definitely like something out of the Twilight Zone here and will get you thinking.

It’s a classic doll story. It’s not really trying to do anything too different but it doesn’t need to either. It’s just a fundamentally sound story from start to finish that hits enough of the high notes. This then takes us back to the main plot for the climax as we get to see what Walter could not remember. Things get really crazy in the climax but all I can say is that I was still blaming Walter the whole time. I thought the ending was also great and you can take it a few ways but I like to think of it as the loop is confirmed. That’s about as vague as I can keep things for now.

The writing is on point here and that’s a big reason as to why this succeeds. If the writing were not very good then this would have failed and if there were weak stories then it would be game over. Instead the stories themselves tend to be rather solid and I liked the main one that connected everything. The film was good with the atmospheric horror instead of trying to make this all too dark. It ends up being a very suspenseful movie that just works well and it never feels too long.

Overall, This is surprisingly a good movie. I can’t say that I had high hopes for it at all but at the end of the day it did surpass my expectations. This is a film that I could recommend to anyone, whether you are a horror fan or not. That’s when you know that a movie is good because it is very accessible. If more anthologies were like this then I may even appreciate that sub genre more but I’d assume this is more of an anomaly than a sign of things to come. I have another anthology coming up after all and that one wasn’t even close to being as good as this one was.

overall 7/10

Halloween H20: 20 Years Later Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s quite telling that the last Halloween film was so intense that this one almost felt a little tame in comparison. It’s still super violent and everything so don’t get me wrong but it’s not being quite as crazy as the last one which is definitely appreciated. You’ll still want to give this one a pass but it does at least try to go back to form with the originals and I would even say that it succeeds at this.

The movie starts out by explaining that Laurie faked her death and is currently living in peace with her son John. She is still deeply traumatized by the whole incident but she is trying to slowly move forward with her life. Her son John thinks that she isn’t moving fast enough though as she still doesn’t let him go away on big school trips and he just feels like he’s trapped. Still, his friends say they’ll have the town to themselves now so John is eager to have fun there. Perhaps Laurie’s fears are not unfounded though as it appears that Michael Myers has returned once more. Can he be stopped or is it already game over for the main characters?

The setup naturally means that things will be in Michael Myer’s favor this time as the town has basically been abandoned since almost everyone went on that big school trip. There are only a few stragglers left behind including the main characters. As you can expect Myers goes to work on these guys fairly quick. Now what you may be wondering about is what happened to the school security? For once they actually have a fairly decent setup here because there is a big gate that prevents anyone from getting in.

This is where the movie has its most cringeworthy moment. So Michael drives up to the school and then hides inside. So the guard Ronnie, decides to…open the gate to check out the car? That’s completely messed up and shows that even if you have the best security systems in place, someone can just mess it up by dodging protocol. I mean jus think about it for a few minutes. Why are you opening the gate? If the guy is in the car and Ronnie clearly thought that he was, then the guy can just speed on through. There seem to be no other guards so you’re just dooming everyone.

Ronnie is the comic relief character of the film but even then this is a little out of bounds. It’s the kind of “Horror movie decision” that I haven’t seen in a while. It used to be a big thing about horror characters always making the wrong decisions to the point where it became a meme but usually you don’t see such blatant examples of it anymore. Ah well, I still like Ronnie but that had to be the worst writing moment in the film.

One thing that holds the film back is the rest of the characters are mainly annoying. So John is in a clique with 3 other characters who decide they should mess around a ton since the adults aren’t going to be around. They love their dark humor and being edgy so it’s the perfect situation for them but of course Myers shows up and throws a wrench into that plan. The characters also don’t have much of a heads up because one of them already loves fake jump scares so by the time that he is out of the way, the others are caught off guard.

It’s not like they would have had much of a chance either way tbh, but it’s still an annoying way to go out. John is rather irresponsible too and while he may have a point about Laurie being overprotective, it doesn’t give him clearance to just do whatever he wants. He went too far and should have just told her about the party. The reason he didn’t is because he knows that he is going to be doing crazy stuff there. That’s why he’s being secretive.

As for Laurie, well it’s hard to blame her for being so shaken up after what happened. Who wouldn’t be right? The whole ordeal was absolutely crazy and the fact that he’s back just makes all of her fears even more valid. I thought she did a good job of fighting back against him here. The most annoying moment is when Ronnie stops her as she’s beating Myers up. Cmon now, this guy is an insane mass murderer, why are you going to stop her like this? In this case he thought that Myers was already dead but in that case there should be no problem with continuing right? It’s all just a bit much if you ask me.

Myers is not a henchmen anymore since the last film doesn’t exist here which is good. He’s still just your basic psychopath but at least he doesn’t work for anyone this time which is a big upgrade. It was always weird to have him play second fiddle to anybody so at least this feels more like the real guy. That said, there’s not much character to him beyond just running around and murdering everyone so I wouldn’t say that he stands out or anything.

As always the film is mainly just held back by how incredibly violent it is. Everyone is bumped off in increasingly violent ways as the body count rises. It may feel less violent than the last one but it’s all still relative and this is the kind of thing that will always doom a slasher movie. It eliminates a lot of replay value because you don’t want to be seeing all of that violence.

Overall, Halloween is pretty much the same as it always was. The plot isn’t anything more than Michael Myers showing up to destroy everyone which is what he does in every film. If you’ve seen one film then you’ve seen them all and there is no reason to watch this one. It never gets past all of the usual slasher film cliches and there isn’t much good to say about it. Aside from Laurie, everyone is written to be unlikable or not very good at their job so the whole task is real easy for Myers. One day maybe we can get a Halloween film that is more atmospheric than violent but I have my doubts.

Overall 2/10

Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers Review

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Halloween has returned with another stinker. While the bar for Halloween movies is already underground, this one did manage to still be a particularly weak installment in the series. We’ve got more action with the cult that is awful and somehow the murders here felt even more intense than in some of the other installments. It is fairly relative by this point I’ll grant you that. Either way, I highly recommend staying far away from these film and definitely away from this one.

So the film starts off with a prison break as Jamie tries to escape with her kid from Michael Myers and the cult. She barely makes it out but gets murdered by the barn anyway. Her kid Kara gets to live a normal life for a while or as normal as it can be but unfortunately her new family are all rather crazy. The film really goes out of its way to make the family as unlikable as possible with the father being abusive and the rest not being able to do much of anything. You have the little kid who is on his way to being the next psycho with his knife skills. All you need to know about these guys is that most of them are completely doomed.

Myers is on his way and the only ones who can stop him are Loomis and Tommy, a kid who has made it his life’s work to stop Michael Myers from terrorizing anyone else. Naturally nobody else is taking the threat seriously. Half the town thinks that Michael Myers never existed and the others figure that he’s dead. Everyone treats the whole thing as a big joke to the point where they are reinstating Halloween and everyone is dressing up in Michael Myers costumes now. The town really isn’t very smart, you’d think either way they wouldn’t be glorifying the guy at least.

Well, it’s all going to be easy pickings for Myers now. For once he feels more like a lackey though which is odd. So the film introduces some new concepts here and one is that there is a whole sacrifice system behind Myers’ madness. See, he only murdered people when the right stars are aligned and you can sacrifice someone to him so that he spares your family. It would have been nice if the cult was just crazy and Myers shows up randomly anyway but he actually does feel like their minion here.

There’s a scene early on where the cult basically summons him to take Jamie down. Myers walks out of one of the office rooms as if he worked there. It’s weird to see him as a minion and it take away from him being the big boss that he usually is. It was a very odd move and one that didn’t do the film any favors. Myers is still going to get wrecked by the end and his regeneration and super strength are not enough to save him. He is definitely a character who isn’t all that great.

As for the cult, well they’re awful. The opening scenes have a long drawn out sequence where they are preparing a baby to be sacrificed and so they’re putting marks on him and such. It’s all rather awful and you’re just waiting for that scene to end already. If the film was trying to make you a bit eery from the jump then it succeeded but at the detriment of the film. The cult guys also have no business being here. They were never supposed to be the focus and yet they do a lot here. There’s even a new guy who shows up…I wonder if he could be the mysterious man in black??

Then we have the heroes. Well Tommy is decent at least. It would just be nice if he communicated more and had some kind of a plan beyond just messing around and finding out. This was his life’s work so shouldn’t he have some heavy artillery or gadgets or some kind? It felt like he was going in blind each time and that’s not a good idea against someone like this. Perhaps he thought that Myers really wouldn’t put up more of a fight than the average dude but since he knew about the prophecy and all that just seems like a very illogical thing to think.

At least he does get some good moments in like clubbing Myers with the bat and all. I can give him some credit here but I was still underwhelmed considering that he basically lived for this. In comparison I can cut Loomis some more slack because the guy is old by this point and he really thought that he was done with all of this. Instead he’s being forced into yet another confrontation and this was one that he was definitely not ready for. It’s always nice to see Loomis but when you think about it he really didn’t do much here.

As for Kara, well I guess she’s an okay main character for the most part. She’s better than some but ultimately doesn’t stick out much beyond being the next target. Kara seemed to have a little less character than previous heroines and that’s because the film was busy with so many plots. There just wasn’t a whole lot of time for her. Maybe for the best though because that meant we didn’t have to have too many scenes with her family. I doubt those would have been very good.

At least the film avoids one cliché which is that when the heroes knock the villain to the ground they suddenly walk away. This happens in Scream when they knock someone down and drop the knife and just about every other series. There’s nothing worse than the main character getting the edge and suddenly her “friends” show up to stop her saying that he’s had enough or he’s dead already. Look, we’re talking about a serial killer who has a massive body count. There is no “enough” yet, you gotta put him down. Then on the other hand if he’s already dead, what’s the problem in landing a few more hits? So when Tommy kept on whacking Myers with the bat until he was literally changing shape, that was the best way to handle it. Even if he regenerates, you’ve bought yourself some time.

Overall, There really isn’t anything else good to say about the film. It’s really just mindless slaughtering as Myers goes around and takes everyone out. The plot is absolutely secondary and you can tell with how halfheartedly they handle the plot with the cult. The whole film is really about shock value instead and you can immediately see this with how drawn out and extended the Jamie death scene was. It was like he murdered her 5 times over with how graphic that was. He definitely was salty about how the last film went but we really don’t gotta see that. Slashers are usually awful but this one stands out even among them. You’ll want to keep it moving and forget that this one existed.

Overall 0/10