

Suggested by Destroyer So Biollante is a very powerful Kaiju and we’ve established that but she’s not going to do much against the man, the legend, Kamina! Kamina has so much power within his soul that he can operate his robot at a high level even when it was a fairly weak one. He fought hand to hand with an alien and doesn’t know the meaning of surrender. Biollante won’t be able to keep up with his mech and he will quickly take the Kaiju down to size with repeated sword swings. Kamina isn’t going down here. Kamina wins.
Biollante vs Green Hornet


Suggested by Destroyer Biollante is a powerful Kaiju who actually gave Godzilla a run for his money back in the day. It takes tremendous skill and power to pull something like that off. The Green Hornet has his gun and a good amount of experience but at the end of the day this is a gap in power that cannot be overcome through experience alone. It just won’t be enough and in the end he will be completely overwhelmed. The guy wouldn’t be able to endure a single strike. Biollante wins.
Lina Inverse vs Magicman


Suggested by Sonic Magicman has some good magical abilities and he actually did really well in his first appearance in NT Warrior. That being said, I do think he will be on the back foot against Lina here. Her spells are at a much higher level after all and her most basic attack has a wider destructive range. So when you add that all up, Magicman really doesn’t have a chance here. She can block anything he tries to throw at her. Lina Inverse wins.
Ferham vs Bison


Suggested by Sonic Bison is a strong fighter with his dark energy and telekinetic abilities but they won’t be enough to stop Ferham here. Ferham can emit a powerful aura that deals out incredible damage and she is also very fast in the air. Bison will have a hard time getting close and when he does he will be taking passive damage just by being near her. If he had more power then he could potentially knock her out before the damage adds up but I don’t see this working. Ferham wins.
Dragonite vs Acnologia


Suggested by Sonic Acnologia is one of the most powerful dragons of all time. His abilities are so good that it took multiple dragon slayers to take him down. Dragonite has his hyper beam but Acnologia could crush that with his fist. Dragonite has no realistic options here that would make this fight even close which is why he will end up being completely stomped. That’s before Acnologia even activates his human form. Acnologia wins.
Sienna Khan vs Lucina


Suggested by Sonic Sienna Khan is a talented hand to hand fighter who is quite quick and resourceful. She should be able to hold her own for a bit but the main problem here is that Lucina is just more powerful. Sienna is quick but when Lucina is launching massive shockwaves and other powerful strikes there is not much that Sienna will be able to do about that. She would need a boost to her overall fighting potential in order to match Lucina and I don’t see that happening here. Lucina wins.
Chaos Bahamut vs Iblis


Suggested by Sonic The Iblis is known as one of the most powerful fighters in all of Sonic. This guy can destroy whole dimensions and has enough firepower to keep up with Super Sonic. That alone is already an incredible feat and one that most characters couldn’t possibly match. Chaos Bahamut has strong attack power but no moves that would be enough to get past Iblis’ durability. That’s what will cost him today and he certainly isn’t fast enough to dodge Iblis’ attacks. So the blows are really going to add up here and ultimately Chaos Bahamut will be defeated. Iblis wins.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters Review
This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

Hansel & Gretel is definitely a very classic story that I’m sure just about everyone has heard of at one point or another. Doing a modern action film based on that premise could be a lot of fun. So on one hand they do succeed in adding a ton of action and it has a very Resident Evil/Underworld feel to it. Everyone’s wearing leather jackets and there is a lot of loud music as everyone just starts attacking. I always like the vibe but the film also decides to be quite over the top violent the whole time which ends up weakening it entirely. It’s a shame since otherwise I think this could have ended up being a whole lot of fun but instead it ends up being rather underwhelming.
The movie starts off with the origin story as Hansel and Gretel are abandoned by their father and a witch invites them to her house. For a long while she has them captured but eventually they destroy her and escape. They then decide to become witch hunters and are very good at it. They’ve slain so many over the years it’s almost like they are superhuman or something. Hansel’s one weakness is that he has magical diabetes so he has to take a shot every few hours or else he can’t move. One day they save an innocent civilian from being executed by a bunch of crazy townsfolk and prepare to stop the true enemy Muriel. The tough part about this is that she is one of the strongest witches in existence. Defeating her will not be easy by any stretch of the imagination.
It is hard to picture how the heroes lasted this long against the witches though because they just aren’t very impressive in a fight. Sure they have the gun and the crossbow not to mention that magical bolts don’t affect them directly (Strange isn’t it?) but that’s it. They still only have human level stats so you’d think the witches could overwhelm them with speed or manipulating the environment to choke them or something. They don’t end up doing any of that and every time they are defeated you have to shake your head a bit.
This gets even more drastic once Muriel steps in because she’s much stronger as I mentioned before. She moves so fast that it’s like she is teleporting and her energy blasts have a wide range to them. I get that she can’t use her mind control on the heroes but there are still so many ways to beat them. This is definitely an example of a movie where they made the difference between the heroes and villains way too drastic. You always gotta keep it at least a bit equal or the plot armor starts to show off too much. At least Muriel does make for a decently good villain though. She has a very concrete goal and takes steps to achieve it. Her plan wasn’t even bad so she put in a whole lot of work here.
Then we have Mina as the girl who was nearly executed. She gets a fairly big role in the film but ultimately ends up being very underwhelming. For the first half I actually just thought she was going to be a really powerful villain that the heroes had to worry about but as the film went on you started to realize that this might not be in the cards. She’s a character whose concept is a lot cooler than the execution. You got the feeling that she could end up being really cool but then the climax happens and that was it.
Likewise there is a white witch in the flashback who looks really bad. Basically like in Final Fantasy a white witch has healing powers while the dark witches use your classic attack spells. The problem is that the white witches are such pacifists that they literally refuse to lift up a hand to fight back even when they are being absolutely crushed. Not a good look if you ask me. There has to be a point where you are going to defend yourself because if you just let people murder you like that then I’m not going to like the character. It’s as simple as that.
Now there is a sidekick character named Ben who wants to help the main duo but he’s just annoying. For starters he lost any single shred of decency he might have had when he tries to take advantage of Gretel while she was asleep. I mean that’s case closed in one fell swoop. You just don’t come back from a blow like that, no shot! He mainly just exists to be the comic relief and doesn’t add anything to the film so you could absolutely cut him out and nothing would really change.
The heroes run into a troll named Edward later on who is nice enough. He helps out Gretel quite a bit which is always good and he means well. He may not be the smartest character out there but he knows enough to be of help when it counts. The guy has the physical strength needed to win almost any one on one fight and he seems like he would be a very loyal ally to have around so there’s no problem with him watching your back.
Then we have Hansel who is a good main character. He has quite the grudge against witches but who wouldn’t in his position right? The witch basically ruined his life and he will never be fully better again so after that it is really hard to forget such a moment. He can fight well which is the important part and is always looking out for Gretel. Likewise Gretel has Hansel’s back and they make a good team. She’s very confident and is always ready to press on in the fight. Their sibling dynamic worked well and isn’t one you see very often in the movies so that was fun. It’s why you could cut out Ben and just keep the dynamic duo banter intact.
Of course the film still has to squeeze in some romance which is why Mina steps in. This whole plot is very rushed and there just isn’t time for romance when you’re trying to take down witches. Lives are at stake and they also have to watch out for the corrupt townsfolk who are everywhere. So instead of pairing up and all of that maybe they should be focused on winning the fight ahead of them. That would have made way more sense at least and it could give them time to develop as friends instead. Yeah the romance should have been cut out.
As mentioned earlier the violence also could have been toned down a whole lot. Characters are being blown up and sliced and diced left and right. The film also goes for some downright gross imagery at different points as well like with Muriel forcing some guys to eat a bunch of bugs. Like did we really need to go there? Sure it shows how superior she is as a mage but cmon now. Then the film has to get edgy with all the townsfolk being brutes who go after Gretel at one point. The film is trying to be as extreme as possible at all moments and it works against the film.
Overall, Hansel & Gretel had some nice potential here. I liked some of the twists and the whole action angle was nice. I do think it could have ended up being a good film if it just showed some restraint. Instead it didn’t show any though and that’s what hurts the film a whole lot. There is no real replay value here and you’ll be cringing a whole lot. It’s time for another hard reboot to this series. You can still keep the witch hunter angle but the whole direction just needs to be changed. Hey, if you do that then you could have a winner on your side but in the meantime you should absolutely skip this one. At least the soundtrack is really good though.
Overall 2/10
RWBY Volume 9 Premiere: What Happens Next?

So RWBY has finally returned! We’ve waited actual years for Volume 9 so it feels like a true accomplishment to have it back. It’s a shame that the season will only have 10 episodes so I’m still hoping against hope that the writers come out and say this was a mistake and they will still have the usual 13-14. If that doesn’t happen though, it does seem to strengthen the theories that this volume is more of a sidestory event just focusing on Team RWBY and their character development while the outside world is being terrorized by Salem.
So with 1 episode down I thought this was a good time to do some predictions on how the rest of the volume might end up playing out. After all not much has happened yet and we got the theme song so this is absolutely the perfect time for theory crafting. It’s been nostalgic going to the RWBY subreddit and reading up on all of the theories popping around over there. I think some of them do have a lot of potential and I’ve got a few thoughts of my own. I’ll have a review up for the season once it’s over so I won’t be diving much into the actual episode. What I’ll say is it’s already introduced us to a fun new villain which is cool. Unfortunately I’m probably not going to love the setting because Alice in Wonderland type areas usually aren’t my favorite and it’s more of a jungle type area than the intense world of remnant. It kind of reminds me of the wacky world in Tenkai Knights.
It is a chance for Team RWBY to catch up and relax though. I do hope we still get a lot of big action scenes though. After Volume 5, 6 started off strong with recovering on the hype fights and this continued to the next two volumes. The only action scene in this episode wasn’t very impressive but I don’t think it was really meant to be. It’s a quick minion fight after all, not a big event. This premiere would end up losing to most of RWBY’s other premieres though because not a whole lot happened as I mentioned earlier. This felt more like a random episode in the middle of the season as opposed to the opener because it was also very short. Fingers crossed the next episode dials things up real fast. Now it’s predictions time though!
1. We really won’t be seeing the outside world at all except for the very final episode.

I am hoping this is not the case as I really want to see what’s going on above ground but I think the fact that nobody showed up in the opening is very telling. I would have expected them to have at least appeared a little bit if we were going to go up there. I assume things are still going on up top unless time is frozen while RWBY is in this realm so you have to imagine that the heroes are in a really dire spot right now. Cinder is more powerful than ever and Salem will be sure to be on the attack soon. Without RWBY the heroes’ forces are much weaker so I just don’t see them even being able to hang on for very long. I’m sure the story within this fantasy world will be fun too but it’s just tricky timing because things were really heating up outside.
2. When RWBY returns to the upper world, there will be a big time skip much like the ending of Resident Evil: Retribution

Any of you guys remember that movie? This is my worst fear by the way so it’s a prediction I hope doesn’t happen but if the team wants to hurry to the climax then it would make a lot of sense. We’d have the team return to the human world only to find out that Salem’s forces are completely annihilating the heroes. You can either go full dark with all of the heroes mainly being obliterated and only a small resistance remains or they are all being defeated when Team RWBY shows up with their new power ups and crush them all.
On one hand of course it would be cool to see our heroines make a big entrance like that but on the other hand time skips are always really risky. A lot of times the content you miss is just so big and drastic that you always wonder how it could have possibly gotten to that point. Absolutely the villains have the edge but if we go back to the surface and see Raven and Winter already defeated it would be a bit annoying because I still want to see how they actually end up fighting against the villains. They have a whole lot of abilities at their disposal after all and I consider both of them to be top 5 in the verse.
3. The new girl from the opening is Ruby’s Scythe

This is a popular theory from Reddit and I think it makes a lot of sense. In the opening we see her leading the group similar to how Ruby was always at the front back in the day with her enthusiasm. When the Scythe washes up to the beach the new girl is the one in front of it. It could be sort of like Bleach where your weapon actually takes up a personality and a sense of self. It will help Ruby gets out of her head and finally regain her fighting spirit. At this point it can be a little annoying how Ruby is quickly brought to tears and faints when bad news comes up so this will be a way for her to finally get past that. I don’t need her to enter rage mode all the time (Although I wouldn’t mind) but it’s time she keeps a stern face about this and this would be an effective way to do it.
4. Each member of RWBY is going to get their ultimate power up by the end of the volume

I think it’s time for the heroines to finally get equipped for the battle with Salem. This is in part because I see us jumping to the climax after this so for the big entrance it makes sense to get their final forms now. I think they will each get some introspection here and by mastering who they are and what they want to do, they will be able to level up their semblance into its final form. Effectively they will gain powers equivalent to that of the maidens without becoming maidens. Main reason for this is because at this point I’m not sure I see all of Team RWBY becoming Maidens. I could totally see Winer and Raven giving Weiss and Yang their maiden powers but Blake and Ruby don’t have the same connections like that. Cinder giving the power to Ruby would be a bit cheesy unless she just hates her so much that Ruby is her last thought. But I think either all 4 will get the Maidens or none will so separate power ups makes sense.
5. Jaune has turned evil and will be one of the main antagonists of the volume

This was a popular fan theory the instant that the first teaser came out with the knight but it makes a lot of sense. Ultimately he made the wrong call in murdering Penny and once you murder someone it’s a quick trip into the dark side. I don’t think Jaune would have had the strength to fight that and so he did turn completely evil. It will be similar to the Supreme King in that the heroes will have to fight him to conquer his inner darkness. Ironically Ice Queendom already did this with Weiss and Blake so basically grab that whole plotline and use it for Jaune instead.
6. Neo will get her origin story and then she will die

Yes Neo already got the book which deals with her past a bit but I don’t think the showrunners are going to take a chance on people not reading it. So we’re going to see a full origin story in the show. It doesn’t have to be long, it can be half an episode like Cinder’s origin but it will give us some more knowledge on who she is and how she got to this point. After that she will die in the fight against RWBY. She won’t be redeemed and will go out as an evil villain to the end which is how it should be. I’m really looking forward to seeing her fight because I still rank her very highly in terms of power levels.
7. This world is attuned to RWBY’s emotions so the way to get out is just to wish for it

As people noted on Reddit the world seems to change based on how the girls are feeling. When Ruby is getting sad and faints then rain starts to fall all around them but when Blake tries to cheer them all up the sun shines in her face. I think it makes sense that the world is sort of brought about by their psyches but it’s a mix of all of them which is why Jaune and Neo are going to turn things for the worse. Again there are quite a few fun parallels to Ice Queendom here. This one may be a stretch, it’s a bit early to say how this will go for sure but I think the theory works as well as any. If this does happen to be the case I’ll assume Neo murdered all the random civilians so their weak imaginations wouldn’t wreck this for her.
8. Weiss will be the only member of the team not challenged emotionally

This one might be a bit bold but I’d love for this to be the case. Weiss has conquered every single one of her demons already. I would argue that she is the most mentally sound of member of the whole group at this point. So nothing this place does can shake her. I could still see the world messing with Blake by bringing up how things haven’t gotten any better for the Faunus. I can see it trying to convince Yang that she isn’t strong enough since she’s still missing an arm. Yang may also believe that it’s her fault that everyone else had to jump in after her since it sure sounded like that from Ruby’s explanation. We already know Ruby is getting knocked out quickly so Weiss being the strong one would make sense.
9. Neo will still be too powerful for any member of Team RWBY individually

I still say Neo is too powerful for any of these fighters one on one. Yang is the only one who I would say has a shot here but even then Neo should be too powerful. She was holding her own against Cinder 1 on 1 in volume 6 and to date has never flat out lost a fight. She crushed Yang in Volume 2, crushed Ruby in volume 3, and continues to dominate. If she loses one on one then it won’t really be satisfying at all if you ask me.
10. We will see what happened to Penny’s body as well as the civilians who fell off the bridge

Okay so I’m going out on a limb here but we absolutely need this to be acknowledged and I don’t think the show has forgotten. This is one where I’ve seen quite a few people saying they doubt the people who fell off the bridge will be acknowledged but that wouldn’t make sense. A bunch of people fell aside from the main 4 and Jaune so I do think they will appear. Whether they were mentally dominated and turned into minions or murdered I do think this will be addressed. Likewise Penny’s body should be somewhere on the island. Who knows, maybe they will revive her a second time although I wouldn’t count on it.

So those are my 10 predictions for the volume. Some are fairly cold takes while others are more bold predictions. We’ll see how it all turns out. Ultimately RWBY is always the greatest show out there so whether this volume loses to some of the other volumes, all of them, or beats all of them, I’m ready for a lot of hype. Having the great discussions and reactions to watch online will be great because now there’s going to be an avalanche of new content to absorb. Hopefully there isn’t a long break until the next volume though. Not sure I’m ready for another multi year break like last time. The RWBY adventures must continue! As a final note, it was a great idea for them to release the full RWBY opening early this time so I can have it on loop every week.
Super Sami Roll Review
Super Sami Roll
It’s time for another quality platformer courtesy of Limited Run Games. This one’s sort of a cross between Monkey Ball and Yoshi. You’re rolling around and trying to balance but unlike the classic Monkey you can use your tongue to maneuver around the levels. Effectively this gives you a whole lot more movement options compared to what you would have otherwise had. It makes for a fun gameplay style that is easy to pick up but hard to master. You are absolutely going to need some really quick reaction times if you are planning to survive this one.
The game starts with The NFT King Albert VII kidnapping Vera so now her friend Sami has to try and stop him. Sami didn’t ask for this fight but he’s not about to walk away from it either. He is absolutely ready to claim victory here and nobody is going to get in his way. To defeat Albert he will need to destroy all of his mecha as he travel across the various lands in search of Vera. If he can manage to truly stop Albert then the war will be over but it won’t be easy. At least he has his owl friend to back him up when the going gets tough.
There isn’t much of a story overall but in line with the retro style it’s going for we do get an opening and an ending here. The quick cutscenes we get are really solid looking illustrations and I’ll always take some kind of cutscenes over nothing. At the end of the day you are absolutely playing this for the gameplay though and fortunately the game delivers throughout. The gameplay is pretty tight and at most you might miss a jump once or twice where you could have sworn that you did actually press in time. Maybe you did and maybe you didn’t…it’s going to be hard to say but otherwise the momentum and jump settings are all on point so you have a lot of control.
You have to balance going carefully with going quickly. If you go too slowly through the levels then the timer will run out and you will lose but if you go too fast then you will end up falling to your doom a lot. With the checkpoints in the middle of the level that does help you not have to worry about this quite as much but you still want to keep it in mind. I will say that the checkpoints were a very good idea because without them I dare say that things would have been very concerning here.
In terms of gameplay tips I would say to use your tongue flip as often as possible. Keep in mind that this ability is borderline overpowered at times. It will help you win a whole lot of levels because the enemies don’t have a counter for it. For example during the final castle level I just could not figure out how to get past all of the obstacles in time. So what did I do? I just broke the level by climbing using a lot of quick tongue flips and I made it to the end. I can guarantee you that this was not how you’re supposed to beat the level as I managed to skip every obstacle and stage element in the game but it worked and that’s what counts. Always master the gameplay mechanics as much as you can and in the end you are sure to surprise even the devs with just how much you can accomplish.
The ost is also really solid here. I was surprised at just how many quality tunes were in the game but they just kept popping up. Particularly the fire world at the end where all of the levels had really fun, fast paced tunes. They just kept hitting you with great tune after great tune. The other worlds had good tracks as well but that was the best one and it is a large variety here. You won’t hear too many repeats as you go through the game and so that keeps everything very well balanced. The graphics are also pretty good here. Everything is always clear and the worlds all have distinct designs. You won’t really be seeing any worlds twice since they all have an element although not every level within a world will necessarily follow that element. For example there are 2 levels following the world 1 theme in the final world which was definitely a twist. Not sure if they were extra levels that the devs just wanted to include or it was a callback.
The game’s length is fairly reasonable. There are 4 worlds here and each one has around 15 levels to complete. The levels can range from 30 seconds to 2 minutes but you also have to factor in that you will probably die a whole lot during the game. So unless you end up being a true prodigy at the title I imagine it will take you around 6 hours or so to complete it. I might be overestimating it a tad but that’s around how long it took me to beat the game. I know it was 3 batches and I think on average I played it for about 2 hours a pop. Maybe lower that to 4 hours total if you’re rounding but 4-6 at least and add or subtract time based on how quickly you go through the levels.
World 1 was certainly really easy but then after that there is a really drastic increase in difficulty which just doesn’t relent. So how long it takes you to get past World 2 will be a good indicator. For me World 3 was easily the most difficult because it’s just really hard to get past ice. The slippery surfaces make things tricky after all. If you don’t master your balance then you are definitely going to be in a really sticky situation. Note that there is also quite a lot of replay value in here as some levels have secret exits which unlock bonus levels. There is also a shop where you can buy color swaps and items but I never ended up using it during my campaign.
Overall, Super Sami Roll is a pretty good platformer. It may not have a deep story or anything like that but it gives you quite a lot of levels to go through. There aren’t many games in the Monkey Ball niche so if you’re a fan of those then you will definitely want to go and play this one as well. That series seems to have slowed down quite a lot after all so maybe we can get more Super Sami Roll games at some point. That would definitely be really nice. There is also a bonus mode you unlock by beating the game where you can play as the main heroine and fly through the levels. I’m guessing they will probably redesign the levels or make them all new because otherwise I can see the player breaking a ton of the stages. Although maybe that will be part of the fun since this is a reward for beating the game after all.
Overall 7/10
