Tag Archives: Horror

The Night Visitor Review

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It’s time to look at an old school horror that takes place back in the olden days. There’s a lot of snow everywhere and you’d possibly think that the film takes place in Russia. That at least would have been my guess as the characters also look Russian although the film was made in Sweden so that’s probably where it takes place. It’s not one of my favorite horror films and if anything I would have to give it a thumbs down here. Right away the film starts digging some holes and by the end of the film it is 6 feet under.

The movie starts off by showing Salem travelling through the snow until he ultimately reaches his destination which is the family’s house. He was sent to an asylum a long time ago for insanity, but has escaped to gather his revenge. We learn during the film that his stay there was orchestrated by the family. Was it Emma, Esther, Anton, or all 3 of them? Each character has some justifications for their actions which amount to nothing more than their greed for money and power. Salem intends to finish them all off and the only defense against him is a young police officer who isn’t the smartest chip around and the old boss who isn’t what he used to be.

You can see why the family is doomed. No worries, the film makes sure to show you repeatedly why none of them are characters you should be rooting for. Alton is guilty of this whole mess and even worse, he tries to murder the parrot merely for speaking the truth. It doesn’t help that the bird looked a lot like my Green Cheeked Conure from back in the day so that definitely meant that Anton had no chance for mounting a comeback at this point. The character was just absolutely terrible and also not that realistic. I know it’s a common theme for the villains to actually be cowards. The irony and all that. It’s just too extreme when the guy literally faints just from seeing Salem. He can’t do anything right and the guy isn’t even remotely clever when dealing with the cops. How he managed to survive this long without dying of stress is beyond me.

Then you have Esther who is also fairly manipulative. For a good chunk of the film she tries to act fairly innocent, but by the end that guise starts to fall apart. She’s probably the boldest of the villains as she actually faces off with Salem and even tries to murder him. That plan was ultimately a little too bold though. She’s fairly strong considering her build, but in a fist fight with someone who is crazed with revenge that just isn’t going to cut it. She didn’t have a whole lot of options at this point, but antagonizing him did not help. Emma’s role is a lot smaller than the other two so you can probably guess what that means. She’s just another villain trying to get away with wrecking lives.

2 wrongs don’t make a right though and none of this makes Salem any more likable. His very first scene where he murders someone completely destroys his character because he goes down the skeevy route of possibly using the victim a bit before finishing her off. That also wrecked the movie right from the start as well. A slasher film is already dark enough, you really don’t need to introduce any more themes at that point. Likewise for the repeated attempts at animal violence. The bird managed to dodge all of Anton’s attempts fortunately but it was still no fun seeing the guy throw things at him and such. I’m sure the bird was pretty scared during all of that.

What did this film even do right? Not really much of anything to be honest. The Night Visitor doesn’t even succeed on a technical level as the snow backdrops don’t work for me. There just isn’t much to look at. The film isn’t very long, but since it’s pretty predictable that doesn’t work in its favor either. Throw in the completely unlikable cast and you’ve got yourself a problem. The best character by default is probably the police chief’s sidekick. The guy falls for every trick in the book and definitely isn’t ready to be the main police officer, but at least he tries. That’s more than you can say for a bunch of these characters in most horror films. I didn’t mind the main police officer too much, but he had less personality and took forever to really do anything.

I’m afraid that the film also fumbles with the premise as well since it all boils down to whether or not you believe that Salem can escape a jail, murder some people, and then run back in before nobody notices. I don’t buy this premise. It’s not like this is a silent endeavor and there would be so many tracks. He has to throw his rope just to make it around and as we saw in the opening scenes of the movie, it’s a very long route to the house. There’s no way you’re going to make the rounds and be back in your cell before time is up. We can assume that the guards are slacking and don’t check, but it’s all incredibly convenient for Salem. He’s also crossing this snowy wasteland in shorts and still has enough strength left to take everyone down. Adrenaline is a powerful thing, but he should have died of pneumonia by the end.

Overall, The Night Visitor is really a cautionary tale about how your past crimes will catch up to you at some point. Perhaps not as dramatically as in this film but it is true that you will always answer for your crimes in the end. These kind of revenge stories don’t really work though as the character might win out in the end but by then everyone is so steeped in darkness that it’s a case of winning the battle but losing the war. In general I rarely care for slasher films as it is, but this one really didn’t do anything to try and change that. It just went with the waves and sputtered out. If you want to watch a good horror title, check out something like Zombie Island instead.

Overall 1/10

Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba

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Demon Slayer is definitely a title that’s been making a lot of waves lately. The fire fight in the forest sure got popular and in general it seems to have hit the mainstream. The manga’s off to a good start, the art style may not be great but I’ve only read the first volume so far so we’ll see how well it improves. I’ll have a review up for the series once it finishes.

Overall 6/10

The Nightmare before Christmas Review

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It’s time to look at a manga adaption of the popular film that came out a long time ago. It’s always interesting to see a manga adaption of a film. They tend to play it pretty straight, but it’s a chance to see how the artist draws the characters and if any liberties are taken. Due to time constraints you can expect some scenes to be cut here and there. It’s a fun enough adaption and makes for a good read although it’s admittedly not terribly interesting. It’s still a good read.

The plot follows Jack who is the king of horror. Every Halloween he gives everyone a good scare but now he is ready for something more. In this world every season has their own country so he sneaks into Christmasland and decides to take a page from their book. Their land will have a Christmas this time and he gets the whole town in on it. Sally doesn’t think that this is a good idea due to a vision that she had, but she can’t really prove it so her case doesn’t end up being very strong. Can she find a way to stop Jack?

The manga isn’t really able to show why this is a bad idea quite as much as in the film. We do have a few pages showing that Jack is a bit sad and the Christmas spirit isn’t really working, but there’s no time to really go into it. Mostly we see the down side of this is just because Jack is ruining Christmas for all the kids in the outside world by giving them terrible presents. Santa is fortunately around to fix this by the end. Jack’s plan doesn’t seem bad otherwise as doing the same thing year after year must be boring. The town was already planning the next Halloween the day after it ended which shows how little the town does.

This town also seems pretty shady. Sally’s creator for example seems to be incredibly possessive to the point where she has to poison him several times to escape. How he falls for the same poisoned soup trick over and over is another story. It’s a rather odd subplot that fits the creepy tone of the manga, but ultimately feels pretty unnecessary. I suppose with only Jack’s plot the story would have been over a little too quickly though.

You’ve also got the villain Oogie Boogie who shows up to strike fear into the characters. Jack seems to know that he’s a bad guy as he warns the kids to stay away, but I guess maybe there’s not much that the town can do about him? They seem awfully resigned to their fate so I guess that’s just how it is sometimes. The whole town is suspect so I suppose that’s just the least of their problems. The final fight is fairly short but at least we do get a bit of an action scene.

The art is pretty solid. It does a good job of recreating the movie’s vibe and everything’s pretty clear. It’s got a good amount of detail which is always important. You’ll be blasting through the manga. The pacing is definitely very fast so there is never a feeling of the story slowing down. As I mentioned earlier, the only issue is that you just won’t get very invested in the characters. You won’t really care what happens to them in the end and there isn’t a real sense of danger until the very end of the volume. This isn’t really that kind of series of course, but either you have a really engaging plot or you have big action scenes. If you have neither then you’re sort of stuck.

The manga makes no mistakes though. For obvious reasons there is no fanservice here or any excessive violence. It’s a manga you could recommend to anyone at least based on content. The title plays it very safe but I still think it could have tried to be more interesting. I think there can be an interesting debate on how far you should diverge on something if the base material isn’t interesting enough. After all, the author/artist probably had little creative input on changing things. Still, I feel you gotta still review the thing in front of you the same way you would if it wasn’t an adaption.

Overall, The Nightmare Before Christmas is a decent story. It’s about as good as a manga as it is in film. The film may have the slight edge but it really is the same story so it’s not like they are very different. If you liked the movie then you’ll like the manga. If you haven’t seen the film but are in the mood for a fun little story about Halloween characters trying to understand Christmas then you’ll enjoy this one as well. It’s only one volume so it’s not like it’s a big time investment either. What do you have to lose right?

Overall 6/10

Resident Evil: Retribution Review

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This review is of the edited TV-14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative.

It’s been quite a while, but it’s time to finally rejoin the Resident Evil series and continue with Alice’s adventure. The movie series has always been a very interesting one. It’s got a dynamite soundtrack and the special effects are on point. It’s also got a very interesting plot and handles the whole zombie angle way better than most other titles. It ends up faltering due to the excessive violence and fanservice running around, but at least you have a decent time while watching it. This film is no exception so you’ll have a lot of fun as the film goes on even if it can’t escape some of the usual issues.

The movie starts off by giving us a brief recap of the last few films. If you managed to forget parts then this will help a bit, but honestly I don’t see how you could forget since the films are too exciting for that. To this day I have to admit that Resident Evil consistently has the best cliffhangers out of any live action movie. They always end with a bang and that keeps you going until the next movie. The credits play before that through a slow motion scene that goes backwards before then playing it again at normal speed. It’s an interesting way to start the film, but I think the scene does go on for a little too long. It’s always interesting to see how the scenes look before they’re at normal speed though.

So last time Jill and the other members of Umbrella stormed the boat and attacked the heroes. Alice was captured during this offensive and is being held at Umbrella’s most dangerous prison. The Red Queen has decided that now is the time to break Alice. Fortunately she is given an escape option thanks to Wesker. He hacked the system and sent in his top agent Ada to help Alice get out. She doesn’t trust him, but she’ll surely die if she stays so she goes along with this plan. The prison is huge with different areas spanning multiple city blocks and each area is infested with zombies that she has met in previous films as well as normal ones. Alice will really have to work hard to get out of here. Meanwhile a squad has also been sent in to rescue Alice from the outside. They’ll have to get halfway through the compound to rescue her, but breaking in is just as difficult as breaking out. Neither side is going to have an easy time here.

Well, lets tackle the film’s weak points first. For starters this is still a film that is focused on using a ton of gratuitous violence as the heroes mow down the zombies. Someone gets drilled with a spinning disc until they’re murdered, others are sliced and diced, and everyone else is eaten alive or shot down. There’s constant violence here to be sure. I feel like it’s less violent than the last one or two, but it’s been a while so it may just feel that way. As always the film does make sure to include one fanservice scene at the very beginning as the villains try to break Alice, but it’s not quite as forced as in the last films. It’s still one of the weakest scenes in the film though and I guess the Red Queen is getting emotional at this point because there really doesn’t seem to be much of a point in kidnapping Alice in the first place. At the very least they aren’t running tests or doing any of the usual maneuvers that you would expect.

The supporting characters are also pretty forgettable. Anyone who isn’t one of the main 4 characters is quickly shoved to the side. It’s hard to care about any of the group members who came to save Alice despite at least one of them possibly being a character from an older film. The main guy is Leon and he doesn’t leave much of an impact. They all just start to blend together and feel like cannon fodder. Ultimately they don’t seem all that important. At least the main cast is solid though.

As always Alice is a great character. She’s certainly kept her fighting skills over the years and is always ready for the next fight. Her character is exactly how I would like Samus to be portrayed if we ever get a Metroid film. To say that Alice is one of the best film heroines of all time would not be an understatement. At the moment I cannot think of anyone who would be above her. She’s just that good and has been consistently solid throughout all of the films in the series. This may still be her best portrayal yet as she is both a solid soldier as well as a compassionate mother figure in this movie. I’m expecting great things from her in the next film as well.

Wesker gets to appear a little here. His role is large but his screen time isn’t although that should change in the next film. There’s a lot of ways the film can finish up his character arc so I look forward to seeing what they choose. He is incredibly overpowered to the point where it seems like he could end the zombie apocalypse on his own. I suppose it isn’t that easy, but it does feel that way. Alice will have to watch out in the next film although thanks to a twist in the ending she may be ready for him.

Jill spends most of the film under mind control but makes for a terrific main villain. Her fighting skills are the real deal and when you mix in her hand to hand expertise she really becomes a serious threat. Her costume is very accurate to the games and she is a scene stealer. Then you have Ada who also gets a lot of hype for her fighting abilities, but isn’t quite as impressive as Jill. I don’t think there is ever a question of who would win if these two were to fight each other. There’s also a kid who tags along for a good chunk of the film. Her plot is fairly sad, but Alice does what she can to help. The kid can actually listen to orders so she is considerably better than most others. Her Mom also did good as she didn’t panic too much when the zombies came and actually fought quite a bit.

Continuing with the film’s excellent execution, it really pulls off the zombie invasion in this small town. It’s an intense set of scenes with a lot of good attention to detail as you see people trying to fight off the zombies in the background. I definitely don’t think heading back into a house is a good idea in the zombie apocalypse, but in the spur of the moment I suppose there isn’t much else you can do. The whole thing is pretty thrilling and it’s like seeing an AU of what it could have been.

As always the soundtrack is dynamite as well. It really feels like something out of a video game and I think that’s part of why these films shine so much. The structure and feel is like a video game and the films aren’t afraid to embrace that aspect. The costumes are on point as well and the pacing is also solid. It’s still a little hard to describe what really makes these films pop, but I think at the end of the day it’s that sci-fi works really well for any medium. It’s why Astral Chain looked so great and why these films are so engaging. Sci-Fi is just excellent.

I also need to point out that the fight scenes here are excellent. Jill vs Alice is certainly the highlight. It’s the kind of fight where it’s one sided, but close enough for both fighters to still be throwing attacks around if that makes sense. It’s just a lot of solid back and forth. Then you have the other fight of Rain taking on the side characters and that plays out as you would expect. She’s simply too powerful and Alice has a tough time there. Throwing in these super soldiers really takes Resident Evil to the next level. If there’s any complaint with this climax it is that the resolution to Jill vs Alice doesn’t make any sense. Stopping the tech should not be so easy because if it was then the fight should not have lasted so long. There would be many opportunities to do what Alice did at the end a little earlier in the fight. It’s also poor design on the villains part.

I didn’t talk much about Rain earlier, but she’s a solid villain. Her good self was also fun and you’ll feel bad for her. She did try her best to help out but is the definition of a red shirt. She was never going to last very long in this brutal world. Rain never faltered and that’s the important thing. Evil Rain is just as solid and really gave the heroes a hard time.

As I mentioned these films are known for their awesome endings and this film does its best to top them all. I’m not sure if I’ll give it the top spot over the original, but it definitely comes close with the heroes preparing for their final battle. It really feels like we have finally made it to the end of the road. It’s hard to see how the heroes will be able to overcome such crazy odds but with Alice and Wesker they have a chance. The tough part will be trying to keep the two from destroying each other in the meantime. The ending also gives a lot of hope for more awesome fights in the next film only this time we may finally be back to the more super hero-esque adventures.

Overall, Resident Evil: Retribution brings the nonstop action that you are hoping to see. It’s a very solid film on all the fundamentals and is definitely the best title in the series. It improves on all the previous ones and does its best to get over some of the negatives. It’s still dug its grave with the amount of over the top violence here, but the upwards slope this film brings the series to is definitely a good thing. If you like horror films or just want a good sci-fi thriller then you definitely need to check this out. So long as you are cool with the violence you can expect to have a home run hit on your side. Hopefully the next and last film in the series can give us a proper ending.

Overall 3/10

Village of the Damned Review

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It’s time to look at an old film with a rather intense name. Apologies to my younger readers, but given the context it’s not really used as a swear word. Regardless I won’t be mentioning the title for the rest of the review so you only need to see it once! Whenever you’ve got the word “Village” in the title you have to be a little weary because those movies do not have a great track record. While this one is certainly a step up from that infamous film, I can’t say that it really succeeds either. When it comes to horror films, it’s hard to say what the best formula is. It’s either throwing in aliens, monsters, or ghosts. I can tell you now that possession and normal humans are some of the worst horror moves. What’s one other kind that competes with those? Evil kids.

The film starts off with everyone in a random village being knocked unconscious and nobody is able to enter the area. Eventually this odd occurrence ends and everyone wakes up. All seems normal for a while, but two months later a bunch of people get pregnant and the demon kids are born into the world. They look like normal kids, but have slight differences in appearance like their hair and claws. They also have the ability to take control of someone’s mind and can even affect multiple people at once. The government thinks they must be destroyed but Gordon believes that they can be used for good. One of these kids was born to him and Anthea which gives him extra motivation to convert them. Alas, they seem to be getting worse and worse instead of better.

Gordon’s plan may not have gone well, but I would still argue that he had the right idea in part at least. These kids are still just kids so even if they have super powers you can’t just destroy them right away. Locking up or quarantining them made sense though so the government agent had some good points. It’s not as if you can stop them with power or hope to protect everyone, but leaving them in the middle of a village with a ton of innocent kids and civilians is really not the best way to go about this. Gordon was too hopeful. It’s not bad to be optimistic, but you can’t be putting everyone else in danger like that. The only life you should risk is your own when it comes to ideas like this.

Anthea is probably the most tragic character here because she’s trying to just make things as normal as possible and David isn’t making that possible. The kids don’t even try to fit in. From the start they act antagonistically. I suppose they want to rule the world and all, but shouldn’t they not be putting so much attention on themselves? David later admits that they caused too much of a commotion but they could have easily gone under the radar. I suspect they are not quite as intelligent as they would have you believe. After all, they have lost to the humans in every major battle so far. With their abilities the kids should never lose.

Here’s why kids don’t work as main villains anymore than they would work as main characters. For starters, you can’t have a proper fight with them. It’s not like you can punch a kid after all. So all of the scenes with them just involve the kids staring the adults into submission until they destroy themselves. Causing the characters to commit suicide is the main trick that the kids use and it’s not exciting to watch in the slightest. I also always have a hard time buying into the whole hypnosis thing so I’m just over here shaking my head while this is all going on. These guys need to work on their will power so they don’t get wrecked so easily.

I suppose by the end of the film it’s safe to say that these are really just aliens who are taking the form of kids. It’s definitely a unique plot even if the payoff isn’t amazing. I actually prefer the first half as the characters struggle to get into the town and have to figure out a way around the dead zone. I expected that most of the film would revolve around this effect turning off and on with the humans getting closer each time. Instead we are introduced to the kid plot which throws in some tension as some of the parents reject these alien beings, but I’d prefer we have focused on the aliens.

The writing here is pretty solid. It’s got that classic feel to it with every character feigning politeness even when they are being aggressive. The pacing of the film is good as well and it doesn’t drag on. At most the second half might be a little grating just because by that point you realize that Gordon is completely in denial and everyone is dying as a result. You know that the townsfolk will fail even though there was a whole group of them. It may have actually been more interesting to have had the government take the win here rather than letting Gordon get all the credit.

At first I thought Alan was going to be the main character while Gordon would be the second in command. The film did a good job of pulling a bait and switch here as Alan quickly goes from being the lead to one of the less intelligent side characters. He doesn’t even realize Gordon’s final plan despite the character trying to be as clear as possible without tipping anyone off. I guess the guy’s army training just wasn’t quite enough for him to be ready for such mindgames. Gordon’s plan was quite solid though. Keeping your mind busy on something else to avoid the telepathic probes is exactly the kind of trick you should be using here.

Overall, this film does a good job of being an atmospheric horror title. There are no jump scares nor does the film resort to violence to try and get a quick scream. The animals don’t even end up dying because fortunately they were only put to sleep. Even the dog managed to live which is amazing because I feared the worst as soon as he showed up. Still, I can’t give the film a higher score because the kids just aren’t very interesting and their scenes can’t hold their own. It’s really up to the grownups to make the film and they do a good job. If you like the idea of alien kids among us then you should definitely check this out. Otherwise, why are you watching this one?

Overall 5/10

Whoever Slew Auntie Roo? Review

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It’s time to look at an old film that tries to be a thriller/horror title. It’s pretty low key in part due to how old it is, but also because it’s not a jump scare kind of film. It has a very British air about it as the villains are polite and there are always veiled threats. It’s not a particularly good film though and this is probably because the main characters are kids. Kids can’t hold their own movies, they’ve never been able to in the past and they certainly don’t seem to be starting now.

The film starts off with Roo introducing herself as a nice old lady who allows a group of orphans to stay with her every Christmas. The orphanage even makes it into a bit of a competition as only the 10 best kids every year are allowed to go. Two extra kids manage to sneak in this year though and they are Christopher and Katy. Roo decides that this time she’s going to keep a kid and so she tricks Katy into staying behind. Christopher finds out about this, but then he is also trapped. Can Christopher and Katy get away from this crazy old lady or is their time up?

Of course this film only works if all of the characters look the other way. From the start why would the orphanage people leave one of the kids behind? That goes past just being irresponsible, they don’t even know Roo all that well. It’s a pretty iffy moment for all of them. Even after they go home though, it should be obvious that the kids are still in the house. Why didn’t the police come with a warrant right away and tear the place apart? Naturally the orphanage people do seem a bit rude so perhaps they didn’t want to have these kids back, but it’s definitely a bad look for them.

The only characters who do realize what is happening turn out to be crooked as well and get some money out of Roo. This also hurts Roo as an antagonist though as she is tricked and suckered for a good part of the film. She’s pretty crazy to be sure, but you at least want her to be in the captain’s seat. Instead she takes quite a lot of Ls throughout the whole film. You definitely don’t expect to see two little kids outsmarting and outrunning the main villain right?

Still, that doesn’t mean that the kids are great characters though. Katy is a little too young so she doesn’t get what is happening the whole time. She mainly slows them down and Christopher means well, but he’s also too young to be of much help. He has a smart play with the fire, but ultimately the only way they are able to succeed is because Roo makes a ton of mistakes the whole time. If she was more on the ball then they would have absolutely been doomed. She has home field advantage and a big edge in speed and power. There’s no real way to get around that.

It doesn’t make for a very pleasant plot though. Even though the film isn’t played quite as seriously as a modern version would be, it’s basically a villain kidnapping two kids. There’s no time for snappy dialogue or good interactions as a result. The character cast is very limited and most of the scenes are just about Christopher being forced to help Roo out with errands around the house. That’s not very thrilling at all and certainly can’t hold a film for very long. There’s no real fun factor in the film so it just drags on and on.

The ending does its best to not make the kids particularly sympathetic either. I don’t think anyone would blame them for taking down Roo, but by the end they seem to have actually convinced themselves that she was a witch from a fairy tail. Christopher is fairly young, but at the same time he’s old enough where you wouldn’t expect him to still believe in fairy tails. While Roo likely wasn’t going to cook them, she was still clearly evil from all the threats she made and she did tend to wave her weapon around quite a lot. I suppose the cops will never find out how the fire really started.

We also can’t forget that the film had to squeeze in a dead chicken for no reason. It’s one of those sudden scene cuts that I suppose is meant to remind you that the villain means business. Roo isn’t the one doing the chopping, but the same chopping knife is used later on so it’s like foreshadowing. The scene also throws in the unnecessary fact that the guy selling the chickens is getting pretty fresh very quickly. It’s a detail that never gets brought up again and ultimately has no point in the film. You can tell that the writing in a film is suspect when there are pointless filler scenes like this one.

Overall, Whoever Slew Auntie Roo is not a film I’d recommend. It’s not horrible for content or anything, but it’s just very dull and lifeless. There isn’t a whole lot happening in this film. It’s like all of the scenes are just filling out the air time, but there isn’t any personality thrown into the mix. The movie is going through the motions but only because it has to and not because it wants to. There’s no real reason to watch such a film as you can find way better thrillers and horror titles elsewhere. This one is like a slice of horror film since nothing much happens beyond the premise. Check out something with a little more character instead like Jingle All The Way.

Overall 3/10

Split Review

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It’s time to finally take a look at the next film in the trilogy involving Unbreakable. This film always looked terrible from the first trailer though and as I didn’t even like the first film I knew this was gonna get dicey. Unfortunately the film is even worse than I had imagined and is ultimately a complete waste of your time. If you want to watch a super edgy/gritty story where the villains manage to keep on racking up wins then this is the one to check out. Otherwise you’re better off heading to your local Duane Reade to buy some cookies.

The film definitely doesn’t waste time as it starts with Kevin showing up and kidnapping 3 teenagers who had just finished having a party. He takes them to his lair where he preps them for being eaten by the beast. See, Kevin’s a psychotic who believes he contains 23 different souls inside of him and 3 of them are evil. Naturally the 3 evil ones are stronger than the 20 good ones put together so he’s gone back to his murdering ways. The 3 girls have to find a way to escape. Claire believes they should try to overpower him, Casey thinks they should just wait and see, while Marcia will follow whatever tactic they decide on. Can they escape?

So the film is distastefully bad almost from the start. Naturally Kevin isn’t a classy villain who just wants to destroy the world or anything like that. No, he is only interested in attacking girls and his mind shatters so often that even he doesn’t know who is in control at times. He has a history of such incidents, but isn’t in prison because he keeps pleading insanity. The whole thing is pretty warped and you don’t really buy into his split personalities gimmick. He’s just a guy with an enhancement ability that gives him super strength but at the end of the day that’s it. It’s all too convenient otherwise how all of his souls tend to lose to the evil ones. There’s nothing interesting about his character.

Then you’ve got Casey’s gritty backstory which is also pretty awful and shouldn’t have been included in the film. Not only does it just serve to give her extra trauma, but then in the end we find out that the uncle is still around. So, he murdered (implied) her father and has been taking advantage of her for over 10 years? This is the amount of grit that you only see in terrible films. If you really stretch it then maybe she will tell the cops at the end, but the silence was deafening. Hopefully that plot isn’t brought back for the third film.

Casey’s a good character overall though as she tries to make the best of a tough situation. She hasn’t let her circumstances break her which is good. The other teens were good as well. Claire definitely showed the most spirit out of the 3, but was definitely doomed from the start. Still, without her actually attempting to escape the others would probably have just sat around and waited til the end. Marcia also had a rough time from the start so her confidence was shaken almost right away. While Casey was quick to play along with Kevin’s insanity it’s understandable that the other two weren’t able to adapt so quickly. Casey was used to dealing with crazies.

Karen is Kevin’s psychiatrist, but ultimately she doesn’t serve much of a purpose in the film. She’s slow as molasses in understanding what is happening. Her plot doesn’t make much sense because the whole time she is the only one who actually believed Kevin from the start. Since she actually thought that his personalities were real you’d think that she would have taken the emails a little more seriously. She knew that he was in danger or different versions of him were in trouble so why did she wait so long to act? She also knew that the evil personality was in control so why did she make so many mistakes over and over again? What was the point of going to his lair?

Maybe she was going to call the cops or something, but surely she knew that she wasn’t going to make it out of there. Also, she wasn’t particularly subtle when going into the closet. She should have at least used the secret word to stun Kevin at that point since there shouldn’t be any hesitation. Instead she panicked and then forgot how to say the word by the end. She’s definitely a waste of a character and her plot line ultimately didn’t contribute to the story.

No worries, Split also managed to squeeze in some animal violence to complete the film’s descent into madness. It’s really got every undesirable trait you could ask for in a film. It’s super edgy, it’s got animal violence, it’s got child violence, and a whole lot of things that happen off screen. There’s also quite a bit of fanservice since the villain uses every excuse possible to put the heroines in worse and worse spots. There’s nothing redeemable about the film and allowing the teenagers to be decent characters is just to make the film even darker. You know from the start that this is the kind of film that won’t really have a happy ending. It’s even worse when you consider that all of the villains get away with no ramifications to continue their chaos.
The film drags on and on as the 2 hours go by. There’s no solid writing to back it up either so hopefully you have a lot of snacks.

Overall, Split is definitely a horrible film that I’d recommend staying far away from. It’s the kind that you should just toss aside and never watch. It’s a poor thriller with sub-par writing and plots that are no fun. The film never even tries to be engaging and it’s far too dark to make for an enjoyable watch. Even the final scene has a defeated sense to it as the guest star just takes another drink because he doesn’t want to get back into this mess. Of course, he’ll end up stepping in for the third film which should still be better than this one at least. Split simply couldn’t stitch the scenes together into a complete feature.

Overall 0/10

Our Mother’s House Review

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It’s time to look at a relatively old film that you probably haven’t heard of. Be warned though, the main characters are a group of kids so…..that already puts the film in a bit of a sticky situation. I don’t want to say that kids can’t hold their own films…but they can’t hold their own films. It’s definitely a movie that I recommend staying far away from unless you love having a ton of drama thrown at you.

The film starts off with a lot of kids running around a house. The 3 oldest ones are the only ones who seem to be fairly calm, but this changes once the mother finally dies from her illness. Now they have to decide what to do. The main character Elsa decides that they won’t tell anyone and the kids can survive on their own. It’s probably not her best idea, but the kids decide to roll with it. At first things are going well enough, but then some of the kids start letting the power get to their heads and become cruel. Will Elsa simply watch as this all happens?

Part of why this is a really bad film is because there are no likable characters. All of the kids are pretty shady and even the ones who are supposed to be heroic just don’t have the courage to stand up and fight for what’s right. A good example of this is Hubert. He’s one of the oldest kids and usually comes up with the more reasonable ideas, but backs down when it counts. One example of this is when Gerty talks to a stranger and the kids decide to punish her. He just watches as they force her down and cut her hair. Gerty probably could have tried defending herself more, but at that point it becomes more victim blaming then anything else. Keep in mind that she’s one of the younger kids so there really isn’t much she could do. It was up to Hubert or Elsa to protect her and since nobody did anything, they’re all guilty.

You won’t be able to take any of the characters seriously as protagonists by this point, although for most the time had already come and gone anyway. One of the kids is always yelling about how everyone’s going straight to hell and another one hears voices in her head. Elsa is determined to be the best kid out there so she doesn’t have time for the others and Hubert gets pushed around by everyone. Gerty is nice enough, but she should have ditched the other kids and gone straight to the police. It’s at the point where you’re just waiting for the cops to run in and stop them.

Then of course we have the Dad who comes in later on. Naturally he’s not a nice fellow either so don’t expect him to come riding in on a white horse to save the day. He’s just here to add in more drama and the characters are pretty gullible so this works out well for him. The plot twist about the mother also adds in the extra drama. At the end of the day the main problem with the film is that it’s just very mean spirited. There are no real winners here. Everyone is basically corrupt and of course you’ll have a hard time buying the ending where a kid takes on a grown up. Sure, it’s not a full fight as that would be crazy, but even as far as sneak attacks go it just makes the grownup look pretty bad.

There may have been some decent ideas in here, but they were all buried by the film. At the end of the day, you can’t really do a long drama film about a pack of kids. There is only so much that they can do and they’re also just too young. Most of their big appearances are just the kids trying to shout over each other so there isn’t much actual dialogue. It’s really just a contest of who can be the loudest with the most dominating personality. Then you’v also got the really random plot where a kid decides to join the main cast as he ran away from home. I don’t see the point of this plot and it ultimately didn’t add anything to the film. What that tells me is by this point the writers had basically finished the script for the whole movie, but needed something to extend the run time. That works about as well as you would expect.

Overall, Even though this is a pretty old film I can’t say that the writing was all that good. The film never gets particularly engaging and the drama is pretty forced. The characters definitely cry a lot and get pretty emotional, but the dynamic doesn’t work nearly as well as it would if they were full fledged adults. To do a proper remake of this you would need the kids to be around 16-17. That way they’re still minors so the overall plot makes sense (If they’re of legal age then they could just take custody of the house) but this way they’re old enough to actually reason and make some plans. There’s a lot you could do with this plot if you actually try. This one did not though so I recommend changing gears and watching the 90’s Sonic The Hedgehog movie instead.

Overall 1/10

Bendy and The Ink Machine Review

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It’s time to take a look at my first ever horror game. I may have played some other games that could be considered to be part horror like Scooby Doo, but none that go all the way like this one. Bendy is definitely an impressive game. It throws in a lot of intense visuals and a dark story without having to resort to over the top levels of violence. It really is quite impressive and this is definitely a game that I would recommend checking out. It has certainly done a good job of really making a name for itself and now I’m ready for the next game. (Even if it isn’t a direct sequel)

The plot of the game follows a guy named Henry as he heads back to his old workplace after having left a long time ago. The whole place seems pretty far gone but he wants to figure out what his old pal Joey wanted to show him. Unfortunately he is then knocked out and may not be able to get out as easily as he thought. The workplace is now filled with beings of darkness and they all want to destroy him. If he gets out of this alive he’ll definitely have some words for Joey, but in the meantime he’s going to make sure to clock in and keep a calm head at all times.

Henry is definitely one of the bravest characters you’ll ever see. It’s almost to the point where it’ll actually take you out of the experience for a few seconds because this guy just isn’t afraid of anything. He keeps a monotone voice throughout the game even when he is being directly threatened. The guy just doesn’t get phased. While it is just gameplay mechanics for him to talk about getting paid for this and clocking in, it does make the save feature pretty memorable and certainly a lot of fun. Henry is the kind of character that you want to lead the team because he is charismatic.

The gameplay is that of a 1st person shooter without the shooting. Effectively most of the game is about investigating various rooms and areas to meet objectives. These objectives range from pulling levers to beating enemies. When you are holding a weapon you can swing away at the villains which is always pretty fun. The gameplay isn’t focused on the combat mechanics though so there aren’t many of them. It’s really just one swing so make sure you get used to it. There are also puzzles here, but none of them are all that annoying. Once you’ve played some of the puzzles you’ll start knowing what to expect as the game goes on.

It took me around 4 and a half hours to beat the game. Online I see that the average was 3 so this is actually one time where it took me a lot longer to beat it than the average player. That’s fine, it’s definitely not a game that you want to be rushing through anyway. There are a lot of little easter eggs all around the place and collectibles to nab. Listening to the audio recordings will help you get a better picture of the plot and story inside of the game as well. The Platinum trophy for this game doesn’t seem all that hard but you will need to play the game at least twice. I feel like the toughest trophy is definitely going to be trying to get all of the bacon soup cans though. There are just so many of them throughout the game and there is no way to see how many there are. Be prepared to play for quite a bit if you want to truly 100% the game.

As mentioned, this is a horror game so the atmosphere is clear. Fortunately this is an area that the game has on point right from the start. The factory that the lead is in is very dark and mysterious. You’re going to see a whole lot of creepy visuals throughout as Bendy and the other villains utterly wreck anyone who comes inside. It’s the kind of game where the Youtube theory videos will definitely have a field day. There’s a whole lot to unpack here and you could write essays on almost any part of the plot. I definitely enjoyed the story a lot and I’m sure you will as well. The ending of the game is perfect and there are definitely a lot of ways you can follow up on this title.

As for the characters, we’ve got a few of them running around. Naturally one of the big ones is Bendy and he is definitely a highlight. Due to the nature of the game he doesn’t appear a lot until near the end, but his scenes are definitely memorable. He’s got a great character design and makes for a solid antagonist. Then you’ve got Boris who is pretty much a Goofy homage. That guy’s probably the worst of the ink supporting characters because he’s always acting nervous and ultimately gets wrecked. He never really put up a good fight. Then you’ve got the Angel(s) who are definitely very solid. Don’t want to spoil anything with these characters, but the duality of the Angel definitely makes for a powerful role. Then you’ve got Tom who definitely doesn’t like Henry at all. The guy’s got a real axe to grind in more ways than one. Ultimately you’ll have to wonder if this guy is really trust worthy anyway.

Sammy is another big villain and he’s intense because the guy is the first big villain to show up. He commands respect and makes for a good boss fight. I like his design and the guy’s just an interesting villain. There’s also a camera enemy how is pretty tough although not Bendy level. I was actually able to defeat him the first time I ran into the guy which was pretty cool. I exploited an area that was too small for him and just kept whacking away at the guy until he went down. Trust me, that felt pretty satisfying since for the most part these guys are always kicking you around. The boss fights were definitely handled very well.

Then you’ve got the soundtrack which is very impressive. There are a lot of really solid tunes here. They definitely help to amplify the setting through and through. You need good music to really complete the world and Bendy had that on point. The graphics are also important and definitely work very well. I played about half of the game during the daytime and half at night. It’s definitely best to play at night, but works either way. This game really knows how to properly handle the jump scares and it left big shoes for the follow-up entry. We’ll see if it can match up to this one.

Overall, Bendy and the Ink Machine is one of those games that you might not have heard of before, but it’s worth taking the plunge. It’s an excellent game that is also quite original. You won’t think even for a second that this one is trying to copy another title. It’s going for a fresh take and that’s always what you want to see. I’ll definitely be keeping my eye out for the sequel even if i do wish it would come out as a full game right away and not using the chapter system that everyone seems to love nowadays. Be prepared for the array of jump scares!

Overall 8/10