Tag Archives: Sequel

Frankenstein Created Woman Review

Posted on by
Reply


This poster is massive clickbait. The film is definitely not going in the direction of Frankenstein creating another monster. He does dabble in the souls business though and causes a whole lot of trouble. In the end this turns into a super annoying revenge thriller and so much time is spent on the villains. There is not a satisfying conclusion here and so in the end I have to give the whole production a massive thumbs down. It was just not in a good spot and I was not surprised since Frankenstein is rarely any good.

The film starts off with Hans’ father getting executed and he grows up with the reputation of being the son of a convicted criminal. Hans helps Frankenstein out in the lab, another guy who has been ostracized by society as a whole. Hans does a pretty good job of following the doctor’s lead and helping out when possible. He also liked a lady named Christina who helps her father out at the tavern. Unfortunately she is often picked on and harassed by the locals. One day Hans defends her and fights back so they get revenge by framing him so he is executed as well. Christina bumps herself off so Frankenstein revives her and puts Hans’ soul inside of her. What Frankenstein didn’t realize is that the spirit of vengeance demands blood! The ghost of Hans is now telling Christina that she must destroy all of the oppressors who framed him for death. Can she destroy them all before the cops catch up?

The 3 bullies are terrible characters so you’re totally cool with them being bumped off in painful ways each time. They really didn’t do much to convince you that they deserved anything better. That being said, this is still not helping the movie much because the whole thing is focused on a ton of negativity. It’s a shame how nobody was doing anything about this. Even Christina’s father was not really doing anything to defend her. I don’t care how rich these guys are, you can’t let them mess with your daughter like that. That’s just awful and you really can’t stand for that. The father was one of the worst characters as a result. Not the absolute worst since those 3 still have to take that but he was pretty bad.

I thought Hans could have done a much better job of defending himself to the judge too. You could at least say you weren’t at the scene of the crime if you don’t want to expose the relationship with Christina. Mentioning the relationship probably would have been a good idea though when death is the alternative as she doesn’t want him dead either. Dying definitely ended up breaking down his psyche with how crazy he got later on.

Also, the revenge is slightly less satisfying with Christina allowing the villains to have their way a bit first. Sure, she knows she will have the last laugh but I’d have preferred a much more direct approach where they don’t have a chance to really get any kind of quick victory. They just didn’t deserve to have any kind of positives here. I’m struggling to think of any real likable character in this movie to be honest. Frankenstein’s assistant Hertz knows a lot of dark secrets and never tells anyone. This is portrayed as him being a good friend but instead what it tells me is that he will always look the other way and that is absolutely not a good idea. When people are doing evil things, the right thing to do is to expose them. So yeah Hertz is compromised.

Also while Christina is really the victim of a lot of this, it doesn’t help that she murders herself twice. You feel bad for her and would have hoped that the film could have given her some kind of a happy ending. The whole thing just feels so mean spirited, like there is absolutely no hope out there. That’s really a big downer for the film as a whole. I wouldn’t say it really had any particularly happy segments, at least none that lasted for any real long period of time. Even Hans and Christina finally getting together couldn’t last because the villains were yelling through the window the whole time. That romance was a bit too rushed though and wasn’t needed.

So the movie is bogged down by lots of heavy violence, some fanservice, and generally being more of a depressing picture. Frankenstein makes for a good villain but he doesn’t appear as much as he should. I like that he’s the only character who can talk tough to everyone. Generally he isn’t afraid of anyone and has a really confident demeanor to him. This guy just keeps on going and it’s quite brilliant. You just can’t forget that he’s super evil here. At no point should you think he is sympathetic or heroic because he makes it clear just how many people he is willing to sacrifice for his experiments. He doesn’t even hesitate to let Hans get executed after all.

Overall, This is one of those films that goes all in on the shock value and doesn’t have much else to offer. This town would be absolutely dreadful to live in with pretty much all of the inhabitants being evil. They look forward to executions and look the other way when crimes are happening. None of these guys would be your friends and would backstab you in an instant. It’s also still weird to watch a Frankenstein film that doesn’t even have the monster at all. I suppose you can always do movies with just the scientist but the monster is typically the big draw. It’s why the poster had the girl version but that design never happens either. Instead this is more of a possession slasher movie. Either way it’s not like the movie would have been much better. I’m sure it would still be terrible so my best advice is to stay far away from this film. You really don’t want to get mixed up with this series. When you see Frankenstein in the title and particularly if it’s a Hammer film, run far away!

Overall 2/10

Brahms: The Boy II Review

Posted on by
Reply


You know that feeling when the opening credits start to play and you realize that the film is not going to be very good? It’s a rough feeling because it’s like the film made some massive mistakes in the future but the scenes haven’t happened yet so how do you know this? It’s just a gut feeling after years of watching the cinema and I’m afraid that the film could not surpass this. All of the characters act insanely illogical and it’s not even in an intentionally absurdist way. It’s just in a plain old poor writing way and that’s tough to beat.

The film starts off with Liza’s kid Jude being super annoying and pulling pranks to scare her. She’s already made it clear that she doesn’t appreciate this but he doesn’t care. Well, one day the whole crying wolf thing doesn’t go well because an intruder actually is in the house and Jude does not give Liza any kind of heads up. She is defeated by the attackers and now has some severe PTSD. They move in with her husband to a more remote location in the forest area to hopefully help them move on. Jude has been unable to speak since the incident but unfortunately he finds a doll named Brahms underground. This doll may be more than meets the eye and Jude quickly starts to get corrupted.

So one of the many problems here is of course how weak willed Jude is. He immediately allows the doll to take him over without a fight which is pretty annoying. He just follows the doll’s evil rules without any kind of pushback. So much for freewill eh? Not cool and later on he even says that he tries to keep the doll happy so it won’t hurt the others. Wouldn’t a better idea be to tell the family so they can prepare themselves? I also don’t really buy this excuse since Jude was directly the one being crazy a lot of the time.

Jude also should have been talking to the parents instead of only talking to Brahms. So yeah I didn’t like the kid and he was pretty annoying and getting in the way the whole time. Meanwhile the parents take some of the blame as well. When Jude starts talking about how they can’t have any guests anymore, they should have been more serious about telling him that he doesn’t make the rules. They should have taken away the doll a whole lot sooner as well. One instance is when Jude makes some creepy drawings about his parents being murdered. That should have been game over for Brahms instead of not really doing anything about it.

Liza and Sean just didn’t take things seriously in time. None of it feels realistic in the slightest, how are you going to let this kid be so disrespectful and crazy the whole time? Lets ignore the supernatural angle because for now it doesn’t matter. Even if it was a normal doll, it’s clear that it is having a negative effect on Jude so it should be removed. That’s basically the end of the story there. If the doll returns after being buried and burned then that’s tough but at least they’d have given it a good try so I wouldn’t really have complaints there.

The side characters are also annoying like that random cousin who is cartoonishly mean. He basically shows up just to mess with Jude and start a fight. Things don’t go well for him but the whole thing felt pretty forced. then you have the gardener/neighbor Joseph who is rather shady the whole time. He looks worse as the film goes on but yeah it does seem like a security risk to have someone who can randomly walk onto your property at any time. You really can’t let your kid just be hanging out at that point.

The film also can’t avoid the easy pitfall of having animal violence. The dog gets murdered and you’re shaking your head the whole time. Another red flag that the parents ignore in part because they have no proof it was Jude and in part because they’re just not ready for this. The film brutally attacks your intelligence the whole time. The worst part of this is that by extension it makes Brahms look rather weak. For the most part he’s not pulling off any great feats the way that Chucky would. You feel like the parents could have buried him again and if they did it right away then they would be good. After all, that’s how they found him last time. Instead that’s just not what happens here.

As far as horror stinger endings go, I would also say it was on the weak side. It was more about checking off boxes than actually creating a really interesting cliffhanger which was disappointing. I don’t think there’s a whole lot you can do to make this a great series at this point. Films about evil dolls can work but you need to do something more with it. You can’t just have an evil doll and then call it a day. That’s not going to do anything, so you need a hook in addition to that. Maybe making Brahms able to turn his owner into a doll, transforming reality, etc.

Overall, Brahms: The Boy II is definitely a pretty bad film. It’s annoying the whole way through and the parents put up with way too much the whole time. It’s less scary and more so just tiring to see the characters constantly not knowing what to do. Brahms should be more active in a future film so that he is actually causing a lot of damage and talking. Having him just do things off screen at best isn’t good enough and possession is something you can do with any villain so it’s not much of a doll gimmick. I would definitely say to give this film a skip, there’s nothing that it’s really got to keep your attention.

Overall 2/10

The Legendary Starfy 3 Review

Posted on by
Reply


Starfy returns for some more hype in this last installment from the Switch Online. It continues to operate at a high level and show that even platformers can have a deep plot as needed. Unfortunately none of it is translated so it is left up to your imagination on just what is going on. The cutscenes are clear enough but it would have been really nice to know exactly what was happening. Hopefully Nintendo decides to translate this one day for future gamers although alas it would be too late for me since it’s rare to have enough time to really replay any game. There are always new titles on the horizon to check out instead after all!

The plot basically loops again as the main villain escapes except this time he is working for a powerful cosmic lord. This guy holds all the cards and may be the strongest threat that Starfy has ever encountered. He will need the help of his friends even more than usual. This is also the first time that you have a secondary main character in the pink star. I think that’s his sister but it could be his best friend. It’s hard to say without the translations… but it’s an interesting gameplay mechanic. She is limited to the abilities he had in the first game so it’s almost like a classic mode. A lot of levels will have you shifting between character several times to unlock switches and then they meet up in the end.

The formula for the levels is pretty solid. You basically have 2 acts and then a boss in each world. There are 10 worlds which is definitely a very good amount. As you can immediately tell, the level count is far shossssssssrter than the second game but the fact of the matter is that it still excels far above the average platformer. So that’s pretty impressive all the way. The levels have a lot of variety to them and each world has a fun theme. You can’t really cheese the levels by gliding but the abilities still take you very far. The levels tend to be more straight forward than in previous games. You won’t get lost at all which is great. There will be times when the levels can even be reasonably difficult so it’s not a game that you can beat while keeping your eyes closed.

The graphics are also good as always. The bright and colorful artstyle really works well for the game. It’s the kind of style that will always age well which is why I encourage games to use it. A live action-esque title will get dated much quicker than one that is so fantastical like this. The soundtrack is decent although that’s one area where the game could stand to use a little improvement. You aren’t likely to remember any of the tunes all that well by the time you complete the game. They’re not bad or anything but making them a little more memorable would have absolutely been a good idea.

Meanwhile the different gameplay styles were all good which was a plus since the animal summons would be an easy way for a game to mess up. The horse is plenty fast so it’s a nice change of pace, the pogo stick has well thought out mechanics, etc. It’s clear that the whole game got a lot of polish and not just the main gameplay style which is definitely not something that you can say for just any game. The fact that this one can say that is definitely something worth remembering.

I will also give kudos to the boss fights like with the first two games. Each boss has a different moveset and you have to beat them in original ways. There is a boss in every world so that’s 10 different bosses without any reskins or clones. That is good and a lot of games could learn from its example. In a platformer, one of the best parts are the boss fights after all. They do a good job of shaking things up from the levels after all and in general are just a lot of fun. This game never forgets that and even gets pretty hype for the final boss. Things really go cosmic in scale.

For those of you who are playing this for the first time, my main gameplay advice would be to always hold down the run button. Every platforming challenge is easier when you have a running start and it gives you just a little bit of an extra boost which is extremely handy. Without that then you’ll be falling a lot. The button can be rather sensitive on the Switch though so definitely be prepared for some early deaths that will feel like they would have otherwise been rather preventable but that’s what the rewind button is for.

Overall, Starfy 3 is definitely a very good game. I had a fun time with it and there is a lot of value to this title. Not a lot of replay value as there isn’t really a post game but not every game need a post story. It would be nice to have but as long as the main campaign is long then that’s all that matters. That’s the part that you’d be spending the most time on anyway. If you have the Switch Online then you should definitely check this one out. It’s not a title that you should miss out on.

Overall 7/10

A Quiet Place Part II Review

Posted on by
Reply


You know that feeling when a movie has a really huge climax, bumps all the best characters off and has an ending that is just open/closed enough where you don’t need a sequel because you can fill in the blanks? But then they announce a sequel anyway? That’s basically this film and it sets it at a disadvantage right from the gate. How can they possibly hope to match the first film when the main guy was already bumped off. The short answer is that at least on the characters front they are completely unable to recover.

The sequel starts off with a flashback that shows how the main characters first met the aliens. They showed up out of nowhere and began terrorizing everybody. They were fast and just overwhelmed this small town. They may have a lot of weaknesses like sound and not being fully bullet proof but for a little spot they are still strong enough to dominate. I have major doubts about them being able to take over the world or anything like that but that’s for another time. It’s a pretty good flashback and I would actually say it is more interesting than the rest of the film. It reminds you of why the main character was solid and knew what to do. He didn’t hesitate at all and leapt right into action. That’s the true sign of a hero.

So in the present Evelyn, Regan, and Marcus are still trying to survive. They locate another survivor named Emmett and ask for shelter but he refuses since they will take up far too much resources and humanity is already on its last legs. They also have a baby around which makes things even worse since it needs oxygen and cries a lot. Unfortunately Regan overhears a signal and realizes she can find more survivors so she heads out without much of a plan or defenses. This forces Emmett to go after her. Meanwhile Marcus doesn’t really watch where he is going and gets wrecked quickly by a trap. He’ll be out of commission for most of the film and Evelyn has to watch out for him while worrying about Regan. What can they do?

With such a rag tag group of survivors I dare say they should have been taken out ages ago. They’re just an extremely loud bunch even if some of the events are stuff they could not have predicted like Marcus falling into a trap and Regan running off on her own. Yeah they’ve got the sound machine and a gun but these creatures move incredibly fast. You just get the feeling that they would have the edge in combat. We actually see the heroes beat a few of them and I was skeptical each time. The alien would generally slow down or miss when it shouldn’t have.

Now we know that the aliens do have a lot of weaknesses, sound, water, and generally any good weapon but even so, a bunch of kids aren’t going to do much here. I feel like the aliens were heavily nerfed in order to make the main characters look good and that’s a rather huge expense if you ask me. They just don’t have the same impact that they did in the first film and in the end that is something that often happens in sequels. I suppose it is unavoidable to an extent but can still be annoying.

As for the characters, I didn’t like Regan. I know that she meant well but her whole plan was completely irresponsible. Leaving without telling the others is super selfish because naturally they are going to have to go after her and put themselves in danger. Evelyn may be ready for action but she has a baby to worry about and Marcus who is still injured. They’re lucky that Emmett decided to help because he could have very well just left. Regan would have then been dead early on. The fact that things end up working out pretty well doesn’t retroactively make her plan good or anything like that. No, we still know that it was a bad plan and that is the big problem here.

Then I didn’t care much for Marcus either. He really just got in the way the whole time with all the yelling. Yeah it really hurts but this is a matter of life and death, you gotta stay strong. Also the first thing about being in a post apocalyptic world is that there is danger around every corner so you should be watching where you’re going. Locking himself in an air tight prison by mistake was also a really bad move. I won’t blame the baby too much for being annoying since there’s not much a baby can do though.

Evelyn was one of the only reasonable characters here. She’s at least trying her best to get through a tough situation. She has so many people to watch out for that she isn’t really able to stand out a whole lot but she doesn’t give up and that’s the important thing. Then we have Emmett who is also fairly reasonable. He’s one of those guys who talks really tough but ends up helping out in the end. There’s not a whole lot to say about him, I’d say the guy is very standard but hey that’s not a bad thing. Better to be generic than bad.

The film can be violent at times although not quite as violent as the last film. I would say it tends to move at a slower pace though and you do got for long portions of time without any real action. The movie’s biggest crime tends to be that it can just be a little boring here and there. Better characters would have done a world of good here but that’s just how the cookie crumbles in the end. I feel like the first film was a whole was a lot more engaging and did more with the premise but this one took a bit of a safer approach. Think of it as a stable ride while the other one was a roller coaster.

Overall, A Quiet Place Part II feels rather aimless for most of its journey. It’s just not as interesting as the first and we don’t really see the aliens as much as you’d think. It feels like the writers aren’t really sure where to go from here because the whole film feels like filler for the most part. Yeah we learn some things like the government’s island plan (RIP to everyone who was just minding their business there) but you could probably skip this film and not really miss much. For a film like this you should be learning more about how we are going to make a counter attack against the aliens or something. This is just a little too low level in terms of what the heroes are planning. I want to go back to the big picture but in the meantime the prequel should be fun to hopefully address my questions on how the aliens could have possibly defeated the military.

Overall 4/10

The Legendary Starfy 2 Review

Posted on by
1


Starfy 2 is one of those games that really understands the mission of a sequel. It is better than the first game in every single way. That shouldn’t be seen as a diss either, but just showing that the company understood what didn’t work perfectly and corrected it for this one. The game has more levels, tighter graphics, more story, etc. It’s just a super impressive game that has 11 whole worlds and each one is quite long. You don’t even see that with modern platformers.

Unfortunately they did not translate the game as always. That’s definitely annoying and still a massive fumble from Nintendo. What can I say? They messed up on this one big time I’m afraid. There are so many cutscenes that you have to click through which tells me that the game really took the whole thing seriously. They built up the best plot they could think of and now I only get to experience a fraction of it. Now granted, what I gathered from it was pretty hype. We have a cool DBZ fight, a bunch of new villains, interesting bosses, etc. I just know the game would be even cooler if I knew the specifics.

The gameplay is pretty close to the first one. You can spin, jump, and get even more abilities as you go through the worlds. Most levels will have you go through to the end but sometimes you need to gather different keys and relics. Some of the puzzles can be a little tricky without the translation but fortunately the game design is really good so you can use intuition to know what the next thing to do is. That’s definitely not something you could say about just any old title right? So the puzzles here actually didn’t hold the game back which is important. The levels are also a lot more streamlined than the original.

In the first one, there was a bigger emphasis on going back to grab different items in order to proceed. It would often shut down the momentum as you couldn’t just go full speed. Here, the levels are much more linear. I won’t say 1005 so, but for the most part you won’t be getting lost or anything like that. Then like I said, the game is quite a bit longer. On average the worlds have 4 levels but then towards the end they have 6. 8 worlds is the standard for a platformer and this one has 11. Now that’s pretty impressive. So you can expect to be here for a very long time trying to clear them all.

The game took me hours and hours to complete. Some of the levels could even be a little on the difficult side. It’s definitely nothing like most of the platformers that you will have come across before now. This one is a serious endeavor that is not for the faint of heart. I’m not sure if there is a post game but I’d expect not since there were no collectibles. Even so, the main campaign is already long enough to justify the whole purchase so that doesn’t matter much in the end.

Then we have the graphics which are bright and colorful as always. I definitely had no issues there. It would hold up well with any modern game and that’s the beauty of having a very good artstyle. It will naturally hold up considerably better than most games which try to look modern and important in the now without understanding exactly what made it work. Games work because they are colorful and that’s one of those positions I’ll take with me to the grave. You want that cartoony vibe to a great degree and while realistic looks can work, you have to be very careful with them.

The soundtrack is a little less memorable. I can’t really recall any in particular that I liked a whole lot. I think they were pleasant enough though. They may not have been the kind of tunes that you would hum to yourself afterwards but they still worked well while playing through the levels. They certainly don’t shock you out of them or anything like that. It’s all well balanced as you would expect something like Starfy to be.

Overall, The Legendary Starfy 2 is definitely a really fun game. Even without a translation, you can at least appreciate the gameplay and dive right into it. This is what I would call a very high budget platformer. It’s clear that a ton of effort was put into all of the level designs and enemies. All of the bosses are quite unique as well and the final boss even has multiple phases which is always cool. These are the little things that really add up to make the game particularly epic and noteworthy. It will be difficult for Starfy 3 to really even try and keep up but I am eager to see if it can pull this off. In the meantime you should definitely check this one out asap!

Overall 7/10

Final Destination 3 Review

Posted on by
Reply

This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for a really bad film and trust me when I say it’s reallllllly bad. At the same time, I didn’t quite think it was a 0 so we have that going for the film. It’s probably the best thing I can say about it to be honest. Like there’s really nothing good about it but I didn’t feel like it was worthy of being at the very bottom of the bucket. Small mercies and all right? Still, if you’ve made it to Final Destination 3 then I imagine you’re probably at least a slight fan of the series so maybe you’ll appreciate this one more than I did.

The film starts off with a bunch of annoying teenagers enjoying a fair and messing around. They all tend to be unlikable jerks and the kind of cliques that you’d want to avoid. If you see them coming then you need to cross the street but it’s probably too late by that point. They decide to head on a roller coaster but Wendy gets the feeling that they’re all going to die so she makes a huge scene and gets off. This starts a chain reaction of other kids getting off and the ones who stay all get destroyed. Now Wendy is feeling some survivor’s guilt and most of the other kids aren’t even grateful that she saved them. It was all coincidence and all that. The problem is that death is mad about the way they survived this and has decided to bump them off one by one. Can they find a way to stop such an all powerful being or is this going to be yet another lesson in futility?

This is a problem with a lot of supernatural slashers which is that we all know the heroes have absolutely no chance. What are you going to do against an opponent who can’t die, can’t feel pain, etc. Death is also immortal so he has all day while the main characters will eventually slip up. Death has no true weaknesses or limitations in his abilities either so yeah this is going to be a long film for the characters. It would help if Death himself actually appeared to gloat or something but he’s treated more like a natural disaster. He also seems like a troll since you could make the case that he gave Wendy the vision in the first place. Sort of like he is bored and just needs a reason to keep on murdering.

Right off the bat the film isn’t helping itself either with all the demonic imagery. Yeah it makes sense to remind the characters how evil everything is but they could have at least pretended to have a little subtlety. Then we also have to make one of the characters a total creep which is annoying. He basically exists to annoy and pester the girls. Even the main guy who we’re supposed to be sympathetic for, decides to take an inappropriate photo of one of the girls in his first scene. The film goes out of its way to make the characters super unlikable.

It’s one of those tactics I understand because then you don’t feel as bad when they are bumped off, but this backfires almost every time I would say. After all you’re now following a bunch of characters who are all just pretty bad. Also not all of them are as bad as the others so some of them feel like they are paying a price that is way too drastic. For example there are two girls who are not very smart, they shown to be rather shallow and really unaware of what’s going on but that’s hardly enough for them to get a grisly murder. You can’t put them in the same category as the perv or the guy who is always ready to pick a fight.

At the end of the day, almost all of the characters are going to get bumped off regardless. I suppose life not being fair could be just another message but it’s not one that I’m a fan of. Then you also have Wendy figuring out the death rules but it doesn’t really make much sense. At least in the first two films you had the mysterious guy throwing in a bunch of lore and helping to confirm what’s true but here she picks up on all of it with the flimsiest reasonings possible. You have a very hard time believing that she actually pieced the puzzle together like that.

For starters, the roller coaster deaths seem hard to predict the order of compared to the airplane. It would have been way harder to keep track of them all. Then conveniently there are people covering the photos at times right up until the murder happens. Again, it feels like death is just trolling the whole time which means the main characters are even more doomed than usual. Mix in how over the top violent it is and that’s a recipe for disaster. What you end up wishing for by the end is at least a few normal deaths. A relatively quick/painless death instead of it always having to be super disturbing.

Maybe have one character cheat death several times with some cool athletics or something. You can afford to lighten up the tone just a little bit instead of the films always being so somber. Even the shock ending isn’t quite as shocking as it could have been. I will say that the subway seems like a fun backdrop though so I’d be cool with that being the main setting for one of these films. Perhaps it would get old quick but I think there is some potential there. Not that this franchise as a whole has much potential though. First thing you need to do is come up with some actual likable characters. Something that can be used as a foundation to push the film forward. Throw in a real plot and definitely give Death at least the illusion of a weakness. If you do that then perhaps we can actually have an adventure.

Overall, Final Destination 3 is definitely the weakest entry in the series. It’s really just an excuse to have a bunch of characters all murdered in very grisly ways. You could say that’s always been the point but at least there was some semblance of a story stringing it all together. I would say this film barely even bothers with the pretense. The characters just keep getting bumped off and at no point in the film are you actually having any fun. It’s just all way too grim dark the whole time for any of that. Definitely stay far away from this film and you will be glad you did. You won’t be missing anything of value here.

Overall 1/10

Dune: Part 2 Review

Posted on by
Reply


After a fairly impressive start with the first reboot film, Dune fell back into its old ways with part 2 and once again tried to be the next Lord of the Rings in all of the worst ways possible. The movie is long, drawn out, and boring. It makes way too many mistakes and will lose your attention early on. Definitely give it a skip and remind yourself that the world of Dune is just not going to end up being all that great. You’re better off using the spices in your kitchen to make a good dish.

Paul has finally been accepted by the Fremen a little more at least to the point where he can be in the circle. His close friend Chani often still has to save him from the jealous murmurings of the others but it’s not like they’re going to stab him now. Still, to truly become one of them he will have to ride a sandworm and in the process he will also meet the qualifications to become their god. He wants no part of that but it’ll be difficult to prevent these guys from believing in the legends. Will this power end up corrupting him? Also, how far must he go in defending the planet. Will he need to start World War 100 and take down all of the many planets that support the regime or should he continue to play defense and watch his comrades continue to die around him as everyone dies from the spices?

As you can probably guess I am all in for going on the offensive here. The Fremen constantly play defense as more and more people attack, but to what end? The attacks will never stop and so I think you do have to actually go and attack their home planets back. The characters are worried this will escalate far too often and how many people will die but they will all go extinct otherwise. It’s basically the same moral conundrum as in Attack on Titan and my position is the same here as it is there. I’m all for peace but once the other side has decided to wipe you out, then you have to fight back as much as possible. It is the only way to survive.

So Paul’s decision here continues to be the right one but he makes so many mistakes throughout the film that it’ll have you annoyed. For one thing, he continues to listen to traditions and do what is expected of him when he shouldn’t. Whenever movies have a message of just conforming to tradition because it is the right thing to do, I end up being annoyed. Perhaps sometimes that is the right thing to do, but often times I would say it is not. You have to believe in yourself and what your intuition is telling you. In most cases, that may very well end up saving your life.

Drinking the nasty liquid to boost his powers? Yeah real bad move there. Letting his mother make the big sacrifice in order to get powers and stay alive? Also terrible. Declaring a marriage just to appease customs? Absolutely crazy! Again, one of the perks of being the chosen one is that you can set new standards. No need to follow the old stuff, just get on in there and set the new rules. With Paul’s super voice he could bring most of the opponents to their knees but unfortunately he only uses it once in a blue moon and seems to forget that he even has the ability.

Charitably I suppose you could say it’s just that it is an ability which can only be used once per day or something but yeah he’s gotta step his game up. Then we have his mother who I didn’t care for either. Again, she just needed to use her own strength but instead she becomes the leader of this super shady group and just continues on with the teachings. See a pattern here? People just do what is expected and that’s it. The only real exception here is Chani and it’s why she’s one of the better characters.

She holds Paul to task and reminds him that she will stand by his side so long as he doesn’t change. He basically doesn’t take her seriously and calls her bluff. Well, she stands by her word and has the best ending in the film. At the end of the day she refused to change just because he did and it makes for a pretty good character moment. I understand that role was divisive for fans of the book and it was pretty much the main thing I would see get talked about for Dune online but I’ll take this portrayal over the books. (Although the books do make Paul look considerably better than he did in the movie) Chani was a very loyal character but someone who still put her own convictions first.

Meanwhile the other kingdoms are comically evil so you’re never really worried about the main character going too far. We’re talking slavery, experimentation, blatant corruption, mass slaughter for no reason, etc. All of the other countries are absolutely deplorable and the villains are just crazy. Unfortunately they’re all in the insane evil camp with nothing remotely likable about them. The one who had the most potential but seduced with ridiculous ease during his own party and suspected nothing. It was such an embarrassing showing for this guy after all the tough talk.

I would say that Dune is mostly focusing on the angle that no individual has enough power to make a huge difference without following the rules. If you rely on your own strength then you will be brought down but if you allow the community to help then you can be on to something. The film is long enough where it has tons and tons of other themes as well but this seemed to be the main one to me. The main character had to make tons of concessions all the time both in terms of his own personal convictions and even in terms of military decisions. Ultimately he probably should have just forced his way to being king and used them like an army. The movie makes this diplomacy so bad that you’re rather he did just become the overlord of the world or something.

Not like there’s much hope left in this place though. With how corrupt the entire universe is, they’d all need to be bumped off for any real peace. The Spice will continue to be a hot commodity until the world has been unified or destroyed. Unless perhaps a new planet is discovered with the same element or something. There is a lot of world building here so I have to give the film that, but you’ll probably still be asleep anyway. Every shot drags on for way too long and the desert is such a boring background. You don’t want to see the sand just fading away for the 10,000th time.

The film gets violent at times just to remind the viewers that it can do this. Then we get endless monologues again. Then we’ll get some kind of twisted scene to show us how evil the king is, then more talking, etc. I love a good monologue but you can’t just talk without a plan. I should probably write an editorial on this, but substance and delivery are equally important here and I would say the film had a tendency to fail on both accounts. It ensured that this film was doomed out of the gate. I basically had issues with every part of it but the biggest sin it had was just being super boring. The characters really lacked agency and it ultimately came back to bite them each time.

Overall, Dune: Part Two overstays its welcome by a very wide margin. It makes sure to eliminate any part that you may have found interesting in the first film and just leaves you exhausted here. I still say it’s better than the original Dune movie which was absolutely dreadful but in the end it just goes to show that the base story is not very good. No matter how many times you readapt the book or try to split it up, it’s not going to succeed. Some stories just don’t have the sheer level of ability needed to become a masterpiece. The best advice I can give would be to not set your sci-fi story on a desert planet. That is setting yourself up for failure. Check out the original Legend of Zelda cartoon for a fantasy with more interesting characters running around.

Overall 2/10

Appointment with Death Review

Posted on by
Reply


It’s time for the next Poirot film. I’m always up for a good mystery so I was ready to see what is going on this time. The locations feel a bit reused though as part of it is on a boat and most of it is on the dessert. We’ve already covered both locations but it is fully a new story. The actual case is less interesting than the other mysteries but I would say there is still enough to make this a pretty good movie. There is little reason to watch it over the others but if you want more Poirot content then this is the way to go.

The film starts with Emily blackmailing her family’s attorney Jefferson. Jefferson has shown her that her dead husband had a new will where she was no longer the sole beneficiary. So she tells him to burn it or she will tell the world about the super shady things he did back in the day and he will be thrown in jail. Jefferson doesn’t want to pay for his crimes so he obeys and scatters off. Emily can now rule over all of the children as they have to at least pretend to be kind to her since she now controls all of the family’s vast wealth. They all go on holiday but wouldn’t you know it, Jefferson is there. Emily has to be careful because he might have some plans up his sleeve. Additionally, Poirot is around hoping to have a good time. That will be difficult though as murderous intent fills the air. Everyone wants to murder Emily but who will get to her first?

As always with these films you have a rather massive cast. There are a whole lot of suspects everywhere and the only tricky thing is that a lot of them look quite similar. Fortunately the characters are always using their names because otherwise I’d get mixed up quickly. Most of the characters are not all that likable though. They just let themselves get pushed around way too much. The film tries to give them some excuses for this like they just don’t know what to do because they’ve been used to being ultra rich but I just don’t really buy it. That’s just not good enough as far as excuses go.

One of the worst characters here has to be Nadine who is married but still has an affair with Jefferson the whole time. She basically does it right in front of her husband Lennox the whole time just to mess with him. Not really someone you want to have as an associate and Lennox should definitely try to split from her. In the meantime, I suppose it’s tough to tell if he should try to keep on beating up on Jefferson or just ignore them since there’s not much point in trying to fight for someone who has no interest in you.

Naturally Jefferson also looks really bad for this. The guy definitely has no respect and you know the relationship will be doomed. He will eventually get bored and the same thing will happen. How you get someone is how you lose them after all. The guy was already not looking good from the start when he decided to burn the will but this meant that he just kept on getting worse and worse as the film went on. The whole thing was just corrupt.

That is often a theme of the Poirot films though. Most if not all of the characters have a lot of personal issues and shortcomings going on. He will solve the case but can’t really solve the inter family dynamics. That’s just not really possible and by the time the film ends, most of the characters aren’t even punished for this. Life will go on and they all will just return to their normal lives. Some for the better and some for the worse. It can sometimes be a little anti climactic but that’s how it goes.

Poirot isn’t some kind of hero here. He only solves the case when he’s been hired to do so or it happens right in front of him. Otherwise he really tries to stay out of it and ignore everything shady that it going on. It’s just not really any of his business and that’s how he likes to keep it. He makes for an entertaining character either way though. If anything it’s part of what separates him from the other characters the whole time.

The writing is good either way although the film underestimates the audience a little too much. I thought there were way too many flashbacks to scenes that we had just watched. It felt like the movie added these in case you forgot the moments but it’s not like this is a 5 hour epic. That felt excessive like one lady saying how she never forgets anyone. The flashbacks showing new vantage points to old shots makes sense, like the kid running and our view of what actually happened. The others were not needed.

As always with these things I do have some parts that I have to stretch my disbelief for. Keep in mind that most of this is taking place in a wide open desert. It’s not a very loud environment and everything is out in the open. So when people are being murdered and such, you would usually expect someone to notice. In this case someone got all dressed up and made a move while nobody saw the whole thing. It’s not as egregious as the boat murder from a previous film but it’s definitely something that will have you shaking your head.

As for some of the other characters, you have Raymond who is pretty annoying the whole time. He likes Sarah but keeps getting stopped by his mother. Why doesn’t he just go talk to Sarah anyway? Well, he’s lacking in confidence and she even calls him out on this. It’s such a bad look and it makes it difficult for you to believe in the romance. What would she see in him at that point? None of the romances in this film are particularly convincing but I would say this has to be the weakest one of the lot. It’s all rather fast anyway even without that going on.

Sarah is mainly a solid character but gets a bit too defensive when Poirot is interrogating her. She seems to take offense to the fact that he is calling her a suspect but detective’s rule 101 is that everyone is a suspect. So why is Sarah so upset about all of this? I thought it was rather a poor look for her. Then you have Lady Westholme who is generally upset at everyone and tries to flaunt her power a whole lot. I appreciate the confidence but she would definitely be tiring to be around after a while. She constantly creates a scene so if you’re around then you’re going to be put on the spot by association.

There are a few other characters but that’s the bulk of them. So like I said, there is a going on here with a bunch of characters running around. At times the film gives the interactions more time than the actual mystery. You could almost say the mystery works more as a backdrop at times. That’s why the writing is very important and fortunately it was handled really well so it never gets boring or anything like that. The pacing is on point.

Overall, Appointment with Death goes through all of the motions but with a little less zeal than the other films. Even though the plot is quite intricate, I think it’ll end up being rather forgettable by the end. Still, it’s a pretty good movie even despite this. At the end of the day I tend to enjoy mysteries so even if this one was a little generic and didn’t try to break away from the others, it held my attention. I would say that generally speaking there aren’t a ton of big budget mystery films compared to other genres so you really want to enjoy the ones that you do get. You don’t know how long they’ll be around.

Overall 7/10

Escape from L.A. Review

Posted on by
Reply

This review is of the TV-14 edited version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative

It’s time for the big sequel to the New York film. This one ends up falling into the trap of basically copying most of the story beats but not being able to do them as well as the first film. The only advantage I would probably give this film is the ending which was definitely real fun. Beyond that, this is still a good movie and so if you liked the original you will want to check it out as well. It just isn’t able to escape the shadow of the first movie.

The film starts with a massive Earthquake separating Los Angeles from the rest of the United States. A presidential candidate predicted this would happen and so he got enough momentum to become the president. He quickly changes the country into a dictatorship and has absolute power. All people who break the laws or engage in taboos are deported to LA. America is now only a place for the virtuous. Unfortunately for him, the president’s daughter Utopia ended ends up hijacking the plane and crash landing in L.A. They’d leave her for dead but if she isn’t found quickly, a failsafe will activate that will activate the USA’s secret weapon and doom the country. They are forced to send in Snake one more time. Can he really save the day like last time?

You might be wondering, why would he possibly accept the mission again. Wasn’t he supposed to have a full pardon anyway? Well, a new president means new rules so he is back to square 1. Additionally they’ve put a virus inside of him so Snake has to save the day or die. He doesn’t exactly have a whole lot of way to say no to this. Snake tries some things like shooting the people who gave him the mission but of course they loaded the gun with blanks. So Snake has to really just fend for himself as always. He has to check a bigger area with less time than the first film so you can tell they are trying to dial up the stakes as much as possible.

Where the film does well is in keeping the Snake hype. He still looks strong and resourceful as always. You can’t really keep the guy down and I like his confidence. Snake probably dispatches people with even greater ease than normal here like when he used his gun on someone who had a knife. The film enjoyed throwing in some humor here and there to balance things out. The fights are fun and the landscape is pretty good. I don’t think it’s nearly as scenic as the destroyed New York from the first film though.

Now the humor can be a mixed bag at times. I don’t think the film is always as funny as it thinks it is. Snake messing everyone over can always be solid of course. I liked him just overwhelming opponents as he lets out the occasional one liner. The random surfing scene with this guy as Snake caught up to the villain was a bit more on the nose. I can appreciate the absurdity of it all but it still wasn’t exactly the film’s best moment. It just didn’t make much sense.

Then the film also starts to weaken the president a little too much by the end. I like the idea of a President who is super corrupt but talks a tough game the whole time. This guy was completely insane and that’s what makes him dangerous but by the end of the film, it was trying to show him as more of a low confidence individual who backs down when the going gets tough. I don’t know how the army could talk so tough to him the whole time. I would have preferred he stay in control the whole time until the end and then catches the L. Making him into more of a comedic figure by the end felt like it weakened the inevitable confrontation.

Still, the movie’s ending was really solid like I mentioned before. It makes sense as a way for Snake to really get the drop on everyone. It was also a good call back to the way the villains messed with him early on. Snake never forgets after all and he managed to stay a few steps ahead the whole time. It’s good that he was a solid lead character though because otherwise the cast was rather weak here. For starters we have Utopia as the president’s daughter who seems incredibly naive. She fell in love with a terrorist who would visit her during her VR dreams.

It’s just hard to see how she could possibly fall for this. You should already have so many red flags popping up when some guy shows up and allowing herself to be brainwashed so thoroughly is rough. By the time she finally starts to come around, it’s just way too late. The main villain Cuevo isn’t much better. He gets tricked a lot and his only impressive moment is when he took down Snake early on. Beyond that, he should have taken out his right hand man Eddie a lot sooner to have kept himself safe. Letting that guy stick around really came back to bite him.

Speaking of Eddie, he’s one of those villains who is pretty annoying the whole time. He is an opportunist so he goes with whoever has the best chance of winning. Don’t mistake his actions near the end for him being a hero, he’s just doing what he always does there. The supporting cast was definitely not doing anything to enhance the movie, I can tell you that much. So Snake had to carry it all alone and while he does pull this off, it’s another reason why it can’t match the first film.

This film isn’t super violent/disturbing for the most part but the plastic surgery place was definitely the most intense. It definitely shows you a rather grim look at what the future could be like if people get too hooked on the stuff. Of course the characters who live there are too brainwashed to do anything about this. There’s one girl who tries to convince Snake that it’s actually not so bad and in a way they are the true free people. Her words are punctuated by a quick gun shot that finishes her off. I dare say that was one of the funnier scenes in the film as they tried to show just how delusional she was.

Overall, Escape from L.A. is a good movie. It definitely could have been better though with a stronger script and a better cast. With the blend of serious moments and comedic type shots they also could have hit a better balance. By the end of the film you start to think that the crazy president may have had a good point. We don’t actually see any innocent people in L.A. as they all seem like total criminals. Yeah maybe the good ones were taken out early but America seems to be in a good spot. There probably should have been a little screentime to show the downsides of this policy of kicking out all the criminals or something like that.

Overall 6/10

Sonic Dash 2: Sonic Boom Review

Posted on by
Reply


It’s time to look at good ole Sonic Dash. I never actually played the original but I did try out the Sonic Forces title a while back which was a lot of fun. It was time to check out good ole Sonic Boom and as you can probably guess it wasn’t given quite as much attention as the others. It feels really barebones next to Forces although I can’t quite compare it to the original yet. Considering that the game has been out since 2018, it’s just surprising how few characters and stages there are. You’re really just playing the same stage over and over again except for one different one that showed up for the Shadow tie in. There’s just not a lot to this game.

It’s an endless runner type of game so the basic gameplay is really similar. You have to run as fast as you can all the way to the end of the stage. You can jump over obstacles and slide under others. When you have enough energy meter, you can turn on auto run for around 5-10 seconds to bust through everything and get more points. Then the level never ends so eventually you can intentionally destroy yourself to end the stage. After you’ve done that, you keep your points and rings which can be used to level up your characters. You can also get a handful of red rings to eventually unlock new characters but those take a while to get. You can only get up to 10 red rings in a day and it takes 120 to unlock any characters.

It makes sense why they would want to make this a slow process though because there aren’t many characters like I said before. There are less than 10 around which is definitely not ideal. You can unlock Shadow through his event at least and he actually has his own attack. All the other characters just slide while he can actually shoot his chaos spear to destroy enemies in front of him. That’s pretty cool at least.

Still, it feels like there should be more content here. I would like to see at least a basic plot, something to keep you progressing through the game. Maybe a lot of costumes or something like that if you couldn’t afford too many characters. Although since it’s just a character model running, I wonder how hard it really is to add more. It doesn’t feel like that should be very difficult at all. Maybe there isn’t much incentive to improve the game since Sonic Boom is basically dead but at the same time they are still doing a Shadow tie in for the movie so it’s not like the game is dead.

One of the biggest weaknesses for the game is also the fact that an advertisement plays after each level that you complete. For me this is always a dealbreaker because I just don’t want to be seeing advertisements like that. It doesn’t really make any sense. It should always be an optional thing like if you decide to earn extra rings or something like that. I’ve always liked the model of using advertisements for bonus power ups and things like that but not as a mandatory part of the game. That to me is when the game starts to feel super greedy.

Also, you have to keep in mind that you are playing tons of levels here so the advertisements add up very quickly. A game cannot succeed like that so this doomed it really quickly. To even try and get me tempted back into the game you would need to cut those out and add some actual content. Not every mobile game needs to be completely endless of course but you still need to have enough content to keep me busy for a while. I seems like I would already be out of content for this one very quickly unless they artificially ramp up the grind factor later on.
‘
I will say the most tempting part of the game is the fact that almost nobody plays anymore though. I was near the top of the rankings for the Shadow event despite barely playing at all so that was pretty cool. It’s the one big incentive about playing dead games and this only works when they don’t just add a bunch of bots to inflate the numbers. Fortunately that wasn’t the case this time. If they did that then you would never get to reach the top.

At least I can say that the graphics are really good. All of the character models are very sharp and look like their Boom counterparts. It would have been nice to have seen characters who weren’t in the show though so they could have had new designs. I suppose that was beyond this title though. The soundtrack is also good, just very limited due to the lack of stages. On a technical level I would say the game did what it needed to. The core gameplay is also really good. Granted, I tend to really enjoy endless runner titles so that’s no real surprise.

Overall, Sonic Dash 2 is just severely lacking when it comes to overall content. The fact that Miraculous Ladybug at launch had more content than this one did 6 years in is absolutely crazy. Sonic can and should have more content than what was represented here. It’s like they really weren’t trying at all and that’s unfortunate. So I would say to give this one a shot. I’d recommend the Sonic Forces dash game way more than this one. It puts in so much more effort.

Overall 5/10