Monthly Archives: April 2020

Ice Climbers Review

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It’s time for the next NES installment. This one’s actually a pretty big one and I’m sure that thanks to Super Smash Bros everyone knows about the Ice Climbers. Unfortunately I wouldn’t say that this game has aged nearly as well as some of the others. The gameplay isn’t very smooth. Effectively this is like a platformer where the obstacles prevent you from doing any kind of platforming. As a result the game ends up fighting itself most of the time and isn’t nearly as engaging as it could have been. It’s more difficult to play the levels than fun to experience them.

The game seems to go on forever although the last unique level is 32. After that it loops back to the first one so you can effectively say that you made it to the end at that point. Fortunately in this version you can actually select any mountain you want. I beat the first 14 and then skipped over to 32 and conquered that one. You do get a certain sense of pride and accomplishment when beating these levels but adding some kind of reward of cutscene would have made all the difference here. Then you would really feel like you were moving up. Instead when beating the levels you’re just going through the motions.

The gameplay is like a normal platformer instead you’re heading up instead of to the fight. The goal is to jump up to the top of each floor. Each floor has 8 layers to it and every time you jump you will hit the next layer. The main obstacles are moving clouds and little bears that keep patching the holes in the ceiling that you make. By jumping you can break part of the roof and that’s how you get up so you need to go fast or the bear will plug up every hole around. If he does that then you’ve just gotta keep on making more holes. You can also whack the bear with a hammer to beat him if you’re on the same level. One thing that’s easy to forget is you don’t die by running off the screen to the right or left so you should do that if you think the other side of the stage will be easier to manage. You can’t jump very far so running off stage is often the best way to travel.

The graphics are pretty solid and definitely hold up better than lot of the NES counterparts. The character sprites and backgrounds are particularly solid here. There’s only one real theme that I can recall but it’s pretty catchy. It’s not exactly Mario or Metroid but it’ll certainly due. At least it adds a little more depth to climbing up the mountain floors over and over again. The actual gameplay isn’t bad, but it would have been a lot more fun if it was more traditional running to the right. Going up just didn’t work for me after a while and in the final levels you can barely move without falling the wrong way. You gotta go about everything super carefully.

Overall, The Ice Climbers is a reasonable game, but one where the obstacles are just too numerous and intrusive. No matter what you do there is always another cloud or enemy around the corner. What this means is that you just can’t focus on running for very long. You’ve got to stop in your tracks more often than not and that’s what really held the game back in the end. I think this game should get a modern sequel/remake as there are a lot of ways you could make this work with today’s graphics and gameplay mechanics. No reason the Climbers should have to end the franchise with just 1 game in the works. In the meanwhile I’d recommend starting your NES Online game selection with a different title. This isn’t exactly the top one in the market.

Overall 5/10

Eliminator Boat Duel Review

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It’s time to look at another classic NES game. This is another title that I was not familiar with before. I’ve never heard of any game quite like Boat Duel but the premise looked interesting. I am planning to try all of the NES games after all so it was only a matter of time before I got to this one. It’s definitely pretty reasonable although some parts of the game have aged better than others. I’ll give it props for the mini cutscenes and trash talking during the game though.

The basic plot of the game seems to be that you are an up and coming boat driver and so now you’ve decided to take down all of the previous bosses. This will be tricky since none of these guys plan to go down without a fight. That’s fine by you though. So you go through the levels and keep on beating various opponents. At least to the point I had gone up to they didn’t reuse any character models so that was pretty good. There was a reasonable amount of effort put into the game and I always applaud effort like that. The gameplay switches between 2D and 3D. I personally enjoyed the opening phase of the 3D levels more than the second.

How it works is you quickly accelerate when the judge gets you the signal. The trick is to actually start right before she tells you too, but the timing for this is very precise since if you go too soon then you’ll end up incurring a yellow flag which will cost you 1000 bucks. Once you get this head start you go to phase 1 of the gameplay. Essentially what happens here is that you have to outdrive the other boat to the goal so try not to bump into things. Then you head into phase 2 which is more of an overhead view than 3D and the same rules apply. You can boost to gain a little speed and even jump. Then there’s also the interesting mechanic where bumping into bombs and other obstacles is actually good as it speeds you up. It’ll cost a bit of damage but you can repair it later. You get to face the next opponent after you beat the current one 2-3 times.

After each race you are taken to an upgrade screen where depending on how much money you have you can upgrade various things. I recommend maxing out the damage each race since it’s super cheap to do this and then you can allow yourself to bump into everything. By the point I stopped I had nearly every upgrade maxed out so I feel like I was pretty close to winning it all. The opponent racers are incredibly fast so if you make one mistake then it could be game over. My main advice here is to use the rewind feature but otherwise I’d say just try and memorize the stage layouts. The stages actually are re-used quite early on so after a while you’ll probably start to remember where the next turns are and such.

The gameplay is pretty interesting but not quite as exciting as your average racing game. There’s just only so much you can do while you’re on a boat so it’s not quite as thrilling. as being in a car. The opponent car also feels a little too powerful at times even when you can see that they haven’t put any real upgrades into the speed while yours is maxed out. I suppose it’s to be expected to an extent but you’ll probably shake your head a bit at that. It just feels like you should be steam rolling the guy. As mentioned though, the trash talking between levels is pretty fun. The graphics are also pretty sound. The sprites have aged pretty well so you always know what is going on. The levels may be a bit repetitive but they are well designed.

Overall, Boat Dueling seems like it has a lot of potential. I’m sure you could make a pretty interesting remake of this at some point. While it’s a cool concept I guess the reason most probably wouldn’t make a game like this is because for that you could just make one about cars and it would probably do a lot better. You just can’t top cars after all. Still, I think you’ll have a reasonable time here and it’s worth a quick check. What’ve you got to lose other than time right?

Overall 5/10

Final Fantasy VII Remake Stats and Records

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Stats time!

Play Time 24h 5m
PS4 Trophies 30/54
Battle Intel Reports Collected 1/20
Colosseum Challenges 0/11
Combat Sims 1/14
Odd Jobs 1/26
Enemy Intel 91/114
Enemies Assessed 3/114
Weapon Abilities 4/24
Enemy Skills 0/4
Manuscripts 0/56
Music Discs 2/31
Cloud Dresses 1/3
Tifa Dresses 1/3
Aerith’s Dresses 1/3
Chapter 14 Resolutions 1/3
Chapters Cleared on Hard 0/18

Character Levels

Cloud 34
Tifa 34
Aerith 33
Barret 34

Baseball Review

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It’s time for another classic NES game. This time we’re looking into the wide world of Baseball. It’s not a sport that I’m a huge fan of both in watching the real thing or playing the video game versions. For the game adaptions, it’s because a lot of the game seems to be RNG to an extent. When you hit the ball you just never know where it’ll go as opposed to something like Football where you deliver the ball where it needs to be. To that extent, I was pretty impressed as I would say this Baseball game beats a lot of the newer ones. The simplistic controls and style actually worked out really well and made the game more enjoyable. I was getting blown out initially but by the end of the game I started getting pretty close. I narrowly lost 15-13 and one more Homer could have done the trick. I probably should have tried for it, but I don’t tend to use the rewind feature in sport titles so I just ate my loss.

The goal of the game is to hit the ball somewhere where the opponents can’t reach it and you score points once you run around the diamond and make it back home. The more points you score the better as the team with the most points at the end ends up winning the match. You throw the ball when the other team is set to hit it and then you shift sides after knocking 3 of their guys out. When hitting the ball you can hold the hit button to keep the bat out instead of swinging it. That way you lay out a bunt and then run for first base. It seems really handy for getting that opening move but after that usually there just isn’t enough time to get to further bases. It’s still a tactic I recommend though.

As for hitting the ball, well that’s where the timing will come into play. Make sure you hit the ball really carefully or you may end up hitting out of bounds or into someone’s mitt. That’s definitely the last thing you want to happen here since a single wrong hit can really make things not go very well for you. The opposing team won’t hold back with their hits after all. Careful when you’re fielding the ball though because missing it once or predicting the bounce the wrong way can end up costing you 1-3 points. Those make a huge difference when it comes to the final total. For all you know that may be the difference between victory and defeat.

There’s not a lot to say about the graphics because it’s basically the same as most of the other NES games. You’ve got some crispy sprite artwork to look at and it’s all pretty easy to see. The menus are clear which is always important. Between that and the solid gameplay you’re set up pretty well. This is the kind of game without a whole lot of extra content so you’ll probably play a game or two and then call it a day.

Overall, Baseball is definitely a fun title. It’s easy to pick up and play and just seems a lot more fun than some of the others like Tennis. As someone who usually doesn’t care for Baseball all that much I was pretty impressed. I’m nearing the end of the sport games on the NES so soon it’ll be time for more of the Arcade thrillers and games of that nature. I’m definitely expecting big things coming up. If you have the Switch Online then there is no reason not to check out this one. Whenever a game is free I feel like you’re obligated to at least give it a quick whirl even if you don’t ultimately stick around. What’s the harm in a quick check right?

Overall 6/10

Tennis Review

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It’s time for another classic NES game. The original Tennis title is one that likely resonated with a lot of people back in the day. It’s a popular sport after all so getting to play it virtually is a pretty cool concept. Unfortunately what ended up holding it back quite a bit here is the fact that the controls aren’t great. It feels like there is always the chance you are just going to hit the ball out of bounds even if it was a clean hit. This just felt pretty fishy to me. Nintendo made the same mistake with their latest Mario Tennis game. Ideally it should be more like Virtua Tennis. The ball only goes out when you know that you hit it the wrong way.

As with most classic NES sport games really the only option here is to jump into a game and test your skills. I played a full best of 5 set with 6 games a piece so it was pretty long. I think one game took around a full 30 minutes which was pretty intense. I managed to get around 6 games I believe, but ultimately I was pretty badly outmatched. The opponent just kept winning point after point while my balls would just end up falling out of bounds pretty quickly. It was at that point that I knew this would be tough to mount a comeback in.

The idea of Tennis is to hit the ball past the opponent. The ball does have to touch the ground though. If you just hit it straight then that’s out of bounds. Each point you win gives you 15 points and every 60 wins you a game. After 6 games you win a set and after 3 sets you win a match. It can still be pretty short if you dominate your opponent but that’s easier said than done. You’ll start to get the hang of when to swing for the ball as the game goes on but it can still be tricky. If you hit the ball a little too hard it’ll end up going out of bounds. It may also depend a bit on where you’re pointing the control stick although I can’t say I’m certain of that point. All I know is that sometimes the ball just doesn’t get the right bounce for me.

Whenever the ball goes out of bounds it just doesn’t feel quite right. It’s fine to lose points because you made a mistake, but it feels like RNG at times. It’s almost like no matter what the ball is going to go out of bounds. Perhaps someone who has played the game more would understand why it is doing that, but to me it just feels like I’m losing out on points for no real reason. Then when I lose it’s less satisfying and more like I gotta give the game the side glance. The graphics aren’t bad. They’ve got that classic NES sprite look that is always nostalgic so I’ll give the game some props there. The ref also looks like Mario so it’s always nice to see that guy participating in all of the sports.

Overall, Tennis was a pretty fun game until it went on. There was a good amount of back and forth for the points and it was all pretty intense. The problem is when the ball would suddenly go out and it would wreck all of the momentum. Now you’re just thinking that the CPU is pulling some strings. If you really like Tennis then you should still check this game out because it is free as long as you have the Switch Online. That’s a pretty big incentive. That said, this is one of the weaker sport titles in the NES online. You would do better with playing almost any of the others that you could find here.

Overall 4/10

Final Fantasy VII Remake Review

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It’s time to take a look at 2020’s Game of the Year title. I’ve been waiting many years for Final Fantasy VII Remake to come out and it was all worth it. You can feel the polish and development time that went into this title. It’s easily the most theatrical game I’ve played since FF XIII-2 and it is fair to say that this one is even higher budget. You could make a case for this being the best Square game yet. I would have to ultimately have it top FF XIII-2 and Kingdom Hearts 2 as the best RPG. It’s really just a definitive title and one that has a ton of content. After beating the game which took around 24 hours, that’s just the tip of the content here.

So the story starts by introducing us to Avalanche. They are a group of terrorists who are trying to blow up various Mako reactors across the planet. The reactors are controlled by a company known as Shinra which basically owns the planet. While this does make life a lot better for many, Shinra excludes the poor who have to live under a dome. Avalanche intends to bring the world back to how it used to be by blowing everything up. There will be a lot of casualties but the idea is that it will ultimately make the planet a better place. To this end, the group has hired a mercenary named Cloud. The guy’s an Ex-SOLDIER which means that he is pretty tough. SOLDIERS in this universe are people who were bathed in Mako and trained by Shinra to be ultimate fighting warriors. Cloud’s just in it for the money but sooner or later he’s going to have to make a decision. Keep on helping Avalanche and fighting Shinra or going his own way.

The plot is ever changing in just about every RPG but especially in something like Final Fantasy. That plot really describes the first few hours and then things change quite a lot. Part of the fun is seeing all of those story details so I won’t go much farther than that. As it adapts the content you’re used to, you will notice one new subplot involving some ghosts that keep flying around and messing with people. It’s a pretty interesting plot and the game gives you a lot of foreshadowing that this will be important. The game goes in some pretty interesting directions by the end. I can’t say much more than that, but what I will say is that I’m not even more hyped for the sequel. It’s really a superb ending in every way.

The climax is pretty great. You certainly have a lot of boss fights to sift through and great visuals. It’s also pretty challenging so make sure you’re ready. I lost the fight the first time so I had to regroup and barely clutched it out the second time. That’s one of the fun parts about the game. There are a lot of times where you will be at the edge of your seat throughout a boss because you’re so low on health and it feels good to get the win. A lot of the battles came down to a last hit situation. It’s a tough game that doesn’t feel unfair. You can always polish up your fundamentals in order to have an easier fight. I didn’t notice many locations for grinding EXP but you could also do that if needed. This is probably the first RPG in a while where I didn’t do any grinding this time. There just wasn’t a need to do so for me.

Some bosses did take around 30-40 minutes as a result though. It’s the price of being low level but it was worth it. I admit that if I had lost any of those fights that would have been unfortunate though. I came really close so many times. My advice is to always make sure you have a bunch of Phoenix Downs and potions. Keep in mind that you can’t use any items unless you have an ATB gauge loaded up so you may also want to equip Revival earrings as well just in case. Those activate automatically so you don’t need to worry about not using the item in time by mistake.

As expected the graphics here are absolutely top tier and same for the audio. It feels like a full movie experience and this game could easily pass itself off as a movie if needed. You could stitch these cutscenes together and just add a few new ones for fights and it could be ready for theaters right away. In particular a game like this always needs a great opening and FF VII delivers absolutely. Then we’ve got the soundtrack which is over 6 hours long according to Youtube’s playlist. That’s pretty crazy. I love to see all the variety here and the various remixes of the classic themes are intense. One of them even seemed to borrow from Advent Children which was a really nice touch.

I haven’t really talked about the gameplay but it is naturally pretty great. It’s a real time 3D hack and slash as you try to destroy the opponents in front of you. One change here that makes it a bit more like an RPG is that you can’t use any items unless you have enough meter which effectively makes it “your turn” to do an action. It makes the battles more intense because you can always choose to use a super attack, use a summon, use an item, or use a spell. Each one costs a spell bar and the only way to build it back up is to attack an enemy with normal attacks. What this means is that if you’re on low health and you just used a bar on an attack, it’ll be a little bit before you can use a potion. Keep this in mind when planning what you will do.

In most battles there will be 3 of you in the party so you can switch to them at any point. You can also just give them orders like which attack to use. For the most part they will never use any super attacks or spells unless you tell them to so when you switch over to them they will probably have a full bar. I recommend telling them to do something whenever they charge up. Also if you have it, give one of them the auto cure spell as soon as possible because that’s a spell they can use on their own whenever you’re low on health. The parry technique is also very handy here. Try to block and counter as often as possible because it builds up the opponent’s stagger meter pretty quickly and can put them in a pressured state. There are a lot of nuances to the gameplay but you’ll pick it up pretty quickly.

There is also the occasional level that uses different gameplay. I always think it’s pretty impressive when a game adds a new gameplay style even if it will only be used for a level or two. A good example of this is the motorcycle levels. There are only two of them in the game but they’re both a ton of fun. It’s a nice change of pace and as I also love racing games what beats mixing the two up like this right? In Advent Children Cloud was definitely a really good expert on a bike so it’s good to see him get to use those skills again here.

As mentioned, the length here is pretty good. It took me around 24 hours to beat the main campaign and that’s considering that I didn’t really do any side quests. The closest to that was when I decided to quickly take a ride on the slide at the park. Beyond that I just played the game straight through and never looked back. I can also see the Platinum Trophy for this game being pretty difficult so that’ll take time too. Even without a post game this would be worth the 60 bucks and with all of the extra content it goes without saying. It’ll be very difficult for any game to take this one down even in the next few years unless they suddenly announce the next Super Smash. Final Fantasy VII Remake did what all Final Fantasy games tend to achieve, it has once again set the bar higher for all AAA titles.

The game has a ton of highs and no real lows so what was the best part? Well, the best part of the game to me would actually be the opening act. Everything up til they destroyed the first Mako Reactor was my absolute favorite part of the game. In part I think it’s because it was the intro so I was still absorbing everything as this really fun movie. It’s all incredibly impressive and while the game never lets up, it’s hard to forget such a beginning. I also liked Cloud’s personality quite a lot in the intro with how direct he can be. The guy was pretty fed up with everything at that point so it made for a lot of great banter between him and Barret. Of course, they had a lot of great scenes after that as well like running up the stairs to the top floor. That segment is great so I hope you don’t choose the elevator there. In general the first act just feels like a really solid mystery thriller. I also liked Cloud’s first confrontation with Reno and Rude. Considering how terrible they looked in Advent Children it’s nice to see how they used to be fairly powerful.

There aren’t a lot of boss fights against human type opponents so enjoy them when they show up. From fighting another SOLDIER to taking on a Shinra boss, it’s always hype fighting another human. These battles really test your knowledge of the parry system as well as your pure fundamentals. You’ll need them if you’re going to take them out. In particular the fight on the roof against the gun wielder was a lot of fun. The fight against Rude was also a lot of fun with the various hand to hand techniques he would use against you.

The cast is also pretty great as expected. Cloud’s basically a perfect lead who does whatever he can to help his friends out. It’s also pretty nice to see his character arc here now that you know the events of Crisis Core and Advent Children so you’ve already got a pretty broad scope of what he’s been through/will go through. Tifa is also a lot of fun as always and tries to be a moral compass for the group. Barret’s probably been helped the most by this remake as I didn’t really notice the guy so much in the original but here he is one of the starring characters. He gets a lot of great moments throughout the game and I really like all of his enthusiasm for the cause. This guy definitely believes in saving the planet whole heartedly even if Cloud thinks he is crazy.

Aerith is more of a mixed bag for me though. She keeps a lot of secrets throughout the game and is intentionally not helpful. Talking a little more early on would have helped out quite a bit. I’m sure she has her own reasons for doing all of this of course, but until we see what those are she can be more annoying than helpful. It doesn’t help that in a fight she’s my least favorite ally to have. She’s good for aerial enemies but beyond that give me Tifa and Barret any day.

The other fighters from Avalanche are cool as well. I’m not a fan of Wedge and he’s mostly there just to give the group more of an unguarded fellow. Biggs is a solid member who seems like your average soldier. He’s got a sense of humor and is a nice guy. I liked having him around. Then you have Jesse who gets a big role here. She’s fun and charismatic although based on some dialogue from the other members she does like stringing people along. Cloud doesn’t fall for it, but this is a bit dubious so it’ll keep her from passing Biggs here. There are a bunch of other supporting characters of course but those are the main ones.

For the villains, well Sephiroth is awesome as always whenever he shows up to mess with Cloud. A lot of the time you have to decide if he is really there or if it’s just Cloud’s head messing with him. Get ready for a lot of seizures. Cloud had a lot of those in Advent Children but he usually didn’t get them quite so much in the OG timeline so you have to wonder what’s affecting him so much. The SHINRA vice president Rufus is a lot of fun here. I didn’t care for him much in AC, but here he seems like a pretty tough boss and in general just a guy that you don’t want to mess with. The other SHINRA leads are less memroable but serve their purpose as good villains. The mad scientist is more on the iffy side. He’d be my least favorite villain if not for the Don also being around. That guy was definitely the weakest one.

Reno and Rude are solid villains as well. Despite all their tough talk and how they act like they have morals they still do everything their boss tells them to do so I still see them as villains. There’s also another SOLDIER who shows up at one point which was interesting. I thought all of the SOLDIERS were already dead by this point outside of Cloud so I wonder how he will play into the sequels or if other SOLDIERS will show up. I guess it makes sense there would be more, we just usually don’t show them. Assuming they are all First Class level that will make for some pretty fun boss fights soon. Somehow I doubt any of them would be quite as strong as Sephiroth, Genesis, or Zack so Cloud should be okay though.

Overall, Final Fantasy VII Remake is a superb game. It is excellent in all aspects and there is not a single weak point to be found in the game. The gameplay is stellar, the cutscenes are out of this world, and the soundtrack is quite dynamic. When you mix all of this together then what you have is an amazing package that ism’t likely going to be defeated anytime soon. I’m hoping the wait for the next installment isn’t too long though. Now that we have all of the character models and assets (Aside from new characters who need to show up) I like to think that we could have part 2 by late 2021 but most likely I guess it would be late 2022. That sounds like ages away though. Ah well, in the meantime it’ll let us discuss the ending a lot more. I’m looking forward to reading the Reddit theories and watching the Youtube ones.

Overall 9/10