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My Little Pony: The Movie Review

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It’s always interesting to read a novel adaption right after watching the movie because then you can really notice where they changed or omitted something. In this case, there was really massive change and a few fairly minor ones. The biggest one definitely involved Twilight’s falling out with her friends. Lets dive into the plot though and take a look at how it stands up on its own.

Twilight Sparkle is planning a huge party to celebrate a momentous occasion. She is even bringing out a talented singer to Ponyville for the event. Unfortunately, it is crashed by Tempest and the Storm King. They want to destroy Ponyville once and for all to show that their power is supreme. Twilight’s kingdom is no longer hers so she will have to go on a quest to find the mermaid ponies and save Equestria. Can she really hope to stop this array of villains or will it all be for naught?

It’s a pretty solid premise. As with the movie, it can just be a little annoying to see Twilight let these villains just walk all over her. At this point in the series her power level is quite high and she should have no problem just blasting these guys away. Instead she spends the movie getting wrecked by just about everyone. Even at the end she has to be saved one last time by her friends. She’s still a good lead character though and ironically one of the changed parts of the comic makes her even better. In the film she tells the other ponies that she wished she had other friends or something to that extent when they were bickering about whether or not they should have stolen the gem of power from the mermaids. It’s a big moment since it’s one of those lines that’s hard to take back and that’s why the team splits. In this case, the team splits up because they call her out for being a thief and Twilight responds with a snarky “Oh yeah?” I guess they took that really personally but it does make you wonder why the team would split apart for something like that. It makes their bond look a little more shallow if we’re being honest. Of course, Twilight’s expression in this moment was certainly priceless so I have to give the artist some props there. It was the best panel in the whole comic.
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The other scene that was cut out was Fluttershy getting one of the guards to cry, but I was pretty okay with this since it made the guards a little more serious. Not that they didn’t have any comedy moments, but now they didn’t have much at all. The book is basically the movie though so there’s not a whole lot of other things to say about it. The cast of characters is definitely solid and the art looks good. Of course, that’s basically the same as saying that the movie looks good. The songs are solid and it’s a good overall adventure.

Even if I did cover it as a movie, I’ll give a quick run down of what was good and bad about the story. The good part is that the action scenes are pretty good and Tempest is a solid villain. Her design is really good and her abilities are definitely the real deal. After all she was able to take down Ponyville in a single day. The pacing is pretty good and something is always happening in the book. The only slow part might be when they head to the water world but it was still pretty good.

On the weaker side, the supporting characters weren’t too good here. I didn’t really care for capper much or the mermaids. The Storm King was quite underwhelming with his dialogue and personality so it would have been cool if Tempest had replaced him. That would have made for a more intense climax. The only other real negative is that I felt like Twilight Sparkle should have done a whole lot better. The fact that she really couldn’t contribute at all was pretty bad.

Overall, You’ll be able to blast your way through the movie comic since it’s really not all that long at all. One batch is probably all that you’ll need to finish it. If you’re a fan of the MLP series then you’l definitely love it and even if you aren’t, it’s just a solid adventure. It will teach you about the power of friendship and that Ponyville is still a dangerous and dark place. It’s just how the place is and you can’t really fault the Mane 6 for it. It’s just the rest of the ponies who need to be a little nicer. Maybe Tempest can help to show them a better way. That being said, at the end of the day it’s probably better for you to just watch the movie then to read the comic. It’s just a more wholesome way to experience the story.

Overall 7/10

The Haunting of Hill House Review

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The Haunting on Hill House is definitely a unique adventure. The characters are all rather calm about the situation but in a rather odd way. Every character seems to be crazy already which is probably why they were invited to begin with. Hill House definitely doesn’t pull any punches once night occurs.

The plot starts off with Montague deciding to head off to Hill House to run some experiments. He decides to invite a few people with supernatural experience since he could use some backup and perhaps they will sense something he could not. These characters are Eleanor and Theodora. Luke also comes since he owns the house while Montague is merely renting it. Is the house haunted or is it merely in the minds of the characters? That’s left for you to decide as things get a little crazy but one thing’s for sure, things will never be the same for these chaps once they leave.

So like I mentioned earlier, the dialogue is all very off. Likely an intentional decision so it’s not bad writing but it does make you wonder about the characters and how far from reality they are. For example, the maid has a tendency of repeating herself and telling the same things to everyone no matter who they are. She may have been the best character to be honest. As she said, supper is served on the dot and she leaves before dark. She has her iron clad rules and doesn’t deviate from them no matter what. You have to admire her dedication and the rest of the characters quickly learned how the system worked that way. Her husband wasn’t quite as fun and only showed up once so he definitely wasn’t meant to be a big character. His threats worked pretty well on the main character but no one else was going to be messed with.

That’s one thing I liked about Montague. Since he rented the house, he always talks about how the others need to know their place. That being said, he is all talk and never actually does anything about it. He does his best to keep the group together and might be the best character in the book. Luke is fairly good as well. He doesn’t believe in ghosts as much as the rest of them and never even gets scared by what is happening in the house. He takes it all in stride and seems to genuinely enjoy the experience. At least someone was having fun right?

Eleanor is the main character by unfortunately she is the worst one. She suffers from low confidence the whole time and doubts every move that she’s makes. Eleanor also basically goes crazy early on but you could make the case that she was already like that when the book began. It would explain her point of view for the book and everyone’s reactions to some of her antics. I imagine she didn’t act quite the same as she claims too. She really put up resistance to leaving the gang by the end and then her sudden finish seals the deal. She was amusing at least though. Definitely a creepy person to be around if you were actually in the house though.

Theodora was definitely the most intense character. She is very outgoing unlike the others and can be very morbid which is an interesting combination. She gets along with everyone even if she finds Eleanor to be too clingy. Towards the end the two do start to subtly insult each other a lot but I’m probably on Theodora’s side here since Eleanor was trying to invite herself over which is never the polite thing to do. Just because you meet a friend on a job doesn’t necessarily mean you suddenly want to have them around all the time. Eleanor did her best to get everyone against her.

I can’t speak for any possible adaptions but in the book at least I think it’s safe to say that the house was not haunted. Most of the tricks could be explained with science like how the building was slanted and that’s why the doors would close. Everything adds up this way. Any possible noises during the night were probably just Eleanor panicking and trying to scare everyone.

Honestly if I had been invited to the house, I probably would have had a blast. The main characters did very little investigating if you think about it and spent most of the time just having picnics and playing chess. Essentially it was like a vacation with free food. In a time without electronics that definitely seems like a fun experience since the things in town may have gotten old by that point.

Overall, The Haunting at Hill House is truly a unique book. I don’t think you will find a cast of characters quite like that one for a while. It’s an engaging atmosphere with how mysterious the air is and all of the strange dialogue being thrown around. I think I would have preferred for the book to have been shown through another character’s point of view although that would run the risk of changing the whole dynamic of the book. Anyway, I’d recommend checking out the book. It’s also pretty short so it won’t take you too long and the pacing is pretty tight. Whether you think the supernatural element is there or if it’s all in Eleanor’s head, it’s a fun story.

Overall 7/10

Dracula: Prince of Darkness Review

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Time for more Dracula! This film actually had the best beginning out of all the Dracula films which was quite impressive. For a little while there, I actually began to think that this film could actually be good. The second half falls back down the rails into terrible territory but at least it actually tried this time. If only the film had stuck to being a slice of life with a few jump scares instead of a nitty gritty vampire film. Don’t we have enough of those anyway?

The film starts off with a bunch of savages about to impale a girl who’s already dead. They want to make sure she stays that way. A passing preacher/evangelist stops them with his pocket gun and tough negotiating skills. He then heads to a cabin where we meet the Kents. 4 people are going on a big tour of the world and are having fun stopping at all of the various bars. He warns them not to go to a castle coming up since it’s evil. To their credit, half of the party listens. The 4 people are Alan, Helen, Charles, and Diana. Helen really doesn’t want to go inside and Diana isn’t fond of doing so either. Luckily a carriage comes along so Charles proposes that they get on it and head for the next town. Unfortunately the Horses are uncontrollable and quickly take the heroes to the castle. It appears to be empty, but a butler remains.

Helen continues to believe that something bad is going to happen and her fears are put to rest as Alan is destroyed and she goes next. Unlike Alan, she is at least given the pleasure of becoming a fellow vampire who will serve Dracula. Dracula wants Diana next, but Charles intends to put up a fight to save her. Charles and Diana head to the old guy from the intro and hide in his church, but the Church has a traitor who works for Dracula and the guy invites him in. It’s now a desperate battle for time, can Dracula be stopped!?

I really did like the intro. The first 30-40 minutes are basically the heroes bickering among themselves and just enjoying the hospitality once they get into the castle. You know that it’s not going to end well for them but at least they are having fun in the meantime. Charles is a pretty good character as he’s not a nervous wreck like the rest of the heroes and doesn’t mind taking charge. Diana may not be as brave, but she always stands by Charles. Alan and Helen aren’t quite as good. Helen is extremely nervous of everything to the point of paranoia which gets old fast and Alan just barely seems like a character. He’s just along for the ride for the most part. Still, it’s a fun group dynamic. These are actually characters that I can get behind and it’s just an entertaining intro.

Then Dracula shows up and things get messy. First of all, the film is quite violent. The Hammer films in general are always a little more intense and this one is no exception. One character basically bleeds to death which takes a while and it’s on screen. Another character gets impaled with a stake on screen. Ironically, Dracula’s death at the end is the least violent since he simply slips on some ice and freezes to his doom. Not exactly the way you’d imagine the famous Prince of Darkness to go out. I’m aware of the Garlic and the Cross as counters to Dracula even if the former never works. I never heard about Vampires drowning in clear water though. I never assumed they could breath underwater, but it’s actually a weakness now? The deck is really stacked against Dracula since he is quite slow and is weak to just about everything under the sun. Good luck beating any more humans at this rate count.

The traitor inside of the Church was annoying as well. He’s a prisoner as they even say to take him back to his cell, but people still take orders from him? Clearly the guy isn’t the only crazy in the place. It’s also awfully convenient how many empty rooms are in the Church so it’s easy for Dracula to sneak around. I was hoping there would be more people running around trying to stop him. It’s also annoying how quick the hypnosis works on Diana. It’s essentially instantaneous which isn’t surprising, but still not all that great. Where is the will power in all of this?

As a side note, this is probably the worst Dracula design. The red eyes just make him look super weak and then the actual movie certainly doesn’t do anything to dissuade you of that notion. Anyone can out run him and while he has super strength, he tends to let his opponents go. He’s also lucky that Alan was quite naive and not too smart as he otherwise wouldn’t have gotten resurrected in the first place. The heroes make a bunch of bad calls throughout the movie. In another scene they see the butler with a baseball bat or some kind of knife, but just shrug. All 4 of them agree that the butler seems crazy and likely dangerous, but they are still fine with sleeping in the manor. At worst they should have just overpowered him and then gone to sleep. They could have woke up the next day with a “Nothing personal” story and that would have worked. Well, I suppose at least some of them got the last laugh in the end so that’s a start.

Overall, This film is really just more of the same. Once Dracula shows up you can switch the footage with any other Dracula film and it’s basically the same. The film goes through the same beats as he takes the heroes down one by one but then plot armor comes to help the heroes. Dracula gets Charles in his grasp at one point, but then throws him away. He completely had the victory sealed up there, but lets him get away. Why would he do that? Seems like it was a bad move to me. Ah well, I’d recommend staying away from this film. You can watch other Dracula films that aren’t as over the top violent and at the end of the day, vampires are past their prime anyway. If you don’t mind stopping early, then the film is quite good if you just watch right up til Alan says he is going to check downstairs. Stop the film right there and it’s a solid 7/10 with a good cast and solid writing. If every film ended as well as it started, a lot of scores would be quite different in the horror genre.

Overall 2/10

Son of Dracula Review

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Given that I’m in the middle of a vampire arc in Detective Conan, it seemed like a good time to review a Dracula film. It’s definitely pretty odd to see Lon Chaney playing the role, but this way he continues to play all of the Universal monsters at some point so I can roll with that. Unfortunately, not even his acting can save the film as it still ends up being your standard Dracula film through and through. It’s just hard to make a good Dracula film whether it be in this day and age of even in the past.

So, the plot starts with a mysterious man moving into town. The main farmer dies very mysteriously during this time frame. That’s when Dracula shows up and suddenly Katherine marries him despite being seriously engaged to Frank. Frank suspects something is up and grabs his gun, but this Dracula fellow appears to be bullet proof and intangible so the bullet goes through and destroys Katherine. Frank is quickly arrested, but it appears that Katherine is still alive. She is now going to be doing experiments with Dracula at night and says she won’t be available during the daytime anymore. Something’s fishy here, but Frank’s in jail so he can’t do much about it. It’s going to be up to Lazlo and Brewster to see what’s happened. Can they really deal with two vampires though?

The film does have a unique twist that I can get behind. Usually the main heroine falls head over heels for Dracula due to mind control and just generally looks terrible the whole time. The twist this time is that Katherine actually went with him willingly as part of her own plan. She plans to murder him once she is undead as well but to do that she will need Frank’s help. She’ll bust him out of jail so he can go to Dracula’s coffin during the daytime and destroy him. Technically it’s a full proof plan, but he makes one big mistake…he goes outside while it’s still night time. Heh…..heh…..hahhahahahahahahahaha!! Of all the mistakes to make…..why is Frank so terrible? I mean, we finally have a good plan and then he messes it up. He even destroys Katherine afterwards because he doesn’t want to be a vampire. I wish I could say he made the right call, but I really can’t. He comes across as a very ungrateful guy who’s of no use throughout the entire film. While Katherine’s plan was extremely dangerous, risky, and probably not good at all, she did pull it off. Frank got the easy job and he still messed it up. That’s got to be a downer.

Dracula doesn’t look very good here. I mean that’s to be expected considering how many weaknesses he has, but it’s still sad for his fans. It’s gotten to the point where just being in the same room as a cross is enough to get him sweating and the doctors always handle him without too much trouble. Dracula is at his best when he’s just uttering threats as opposed to trying to follow up on them. At any rate, at least Dracula is fun to listen to. Seriously, Chaney has one of the best voices in cinema with ease. Most other actors can’t even get close to his level. Dracula is just not a good character though.

I felt like the rest of the cast were pretty slow on the uptake here. Katherine’s sister made a few half hearted attempts to see what was happening, but didn’t play her cards right. She basically told Frank that the cops were onto him and took forever to get out of harm’s way. Brewster noticed right away that Alucard is just another way of saying Dracula, but just brushed it off and didn’t remember until we were deep into the film. He could have saved lives if he had acted with a little more urgency. Lazlo was experienced at least so that was nice to see. He may have been the best character here even if that isn’t saying a lot. At least he was making a real effort to do his best.

The Sheriff meant well. When he investigated the place and found the dead body, it was certainly reasonable for him to suspect Brewster as an accomplice. It’s also hard to take their word for it that a vampire is on the prowl since that doesn’t seem all that reasonable. At least he was better than the other cop who couldn’t guard a man if his life depended on it and got scared of everything. If you’re going to be a cop, I feel like there’s at least a minimum level of bravery that you should have and it should be enough for you to not be scared of vampires.

Overall, Son of Dracula is more of less what you’d expect from the series. There’s not a whole lot to say about the film that I haven’t already. At least there was no animal violence this time. That’s certainly a nice start. The supporting cast was also quite reasonable for a change even if it could still be annoying how they wouldn’t realize anything until it was too late. The cops were a nice addition. I wouldn’t recommend this film and you should probably stay far away. Just remember for the next time that while Dracula can be scary, it can always be worse. You could be dealing with the Wolf Man who has less obvious weaknesses. With Dracula you can hold up to sticks and cross them and that’s enough to deter him. The ending to the film was pretty weak and here’s how it should have happened. Frank becomes a vampire along with Katherine and then they play it off like she was in the woods or something and that’s why her body vanished. She explains that they were just imagining they saw her dead body and this way everyone lives happily ever after. Sure, Frank didn’t get a choice on if he wanted to be a vampire or not, but it can’t always be perfect for the guy.

Overall 4/10

Wonder Woman ’77 Volume 1 Review

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Unlike the Batman’66 series, I don’t know much about the old Wonder Woman show. Still, if it was anything like the Batman comics, I knew this would be a winner. It’s definitely a fun comic and while the art isn’t quite as good as you’d hope, it has its moments. Hopefully this series did/is doing well so it keeps on going. We could use more retro comics like this. Next they need to bring in a Superman ’55 series or something.

There are only 2 issues in this volume but it’s as long as any Batman’66 comic so I guess they’re all triple length. They definitely feel like long comics and even have multiple stories inside so that’s cool. The first story has Wonder Woman go up against the Swan. The Swan was crashing a party so WW had to quickly step in. The fight actually lasts for a little while and was a good way to kick off the adventures. Villains who use super voices are definitely formidable opponents to be sure, but it can’t beat classic super strength.

The next story was also pretty solid as Wonder Woman wakes up to find out that someone else is playing the part. It’s always a pretty interesting premise as you have to wonder which reality warper is messing around this time. It’s pretty disheartening to be benched to the sidelines when you’re used to being a starter. Also, no worries it isn’t a dream or something like that. Either way I’d probably say that it’s the best story in the batch. It was just nice and interesting all the way through.

Following that is the return of the Cheetah. She feels bad because her exhibit was cancelled at the last second so the museum could do a feature about Wonder Woman. As a result, she found the Cheetah costume/artifact and became a super villain. As a result, this is a different Cheetah than usual. Wonder Woman still defeats her with minimal effort, but it was a good comic. I’m always up for another version of Cheetah since it means that eventually a good one will pop up.

The next comic really stood out because of the artwork. It looked a little different this time. Some of the faces could still be way off at times, but I thought the villain’s design was handled well. Her name is Celsia and I’ve never heard of her before so it’s possible that she was made up for the issue. She has Ice and Fire abilities which is always a nice combo since she can now counter most elements. She manages to give Wonder Woman a good fight and it’s always nice to have a villain that is trying to defy corporate. It was probably the second best story of the bunch and even added in the shady government subplot to keep the characters honest.

Finally, we end on a serious note with a very short last comic. Solomon Grundy shows up to help a lady who is in a bad relationship with random joe #45. Wonder Woman fights him for a bit, but then finds out the reason for Grundy’s appearance and helps justice be served. It’s definitely a pretty dark comic for the usually happy Wonder Woman stories and was probably a short story that was released to raise awareness. WW even quickly reminds the girl that she should testify in court to make sure the guy is put away and to embolden others. A good story even if it seems a little out of place next to the others. It’s only a few pages long at any rate.

As mentioned earlier, the art is definitely a step down from Batman’66. It’s going for one of those quasi live action looks where everyone is super realistic. I never think that’s a good option for a comic and this was no exception. It’s not really bad or anything and once in a while the visuals will look good, but I do think it holds the series back just a bit.

Also, this may just be due to the show being like this as well, but Wonder Woman doesn’t make nearly as many one liners and wisecracks as Batman and Robin. She’s also not a super goody goody like them either so the writing isn’t quite as funny. She’s a noble hero, but the comic doesn’t do much else for her. She is also a little more naive than the other heroes which leads to multiple misunderstandings which in turn get the villains to show up. Of course, Wonder Woman is still a good character though and I didn’t mind Steve as a supporting character either. It’s a little hard to gauge how strong Wonder Woman is here, but she at least does have some degree of super strength. As such, I want to see the next volume give her more of a super villain to go up against. The fights will never get too massive since that’s not the point of these retro comics, but even if it’s brief it would be fun to see a quick super powered tussle.

Overall, it’s a good start for the Wonder Woman comics. If each issue stays this large, it should have no problem getting a bunch of trade paperbacks. I look forward to seeing the rest of Wonder Woman’s cast show up. Also, the more volumes it gets, the more I will be used to the characters and that should help the series get better and better. Switch the artist and the series will probably jump up a star instantly. I haven’t read a great many Wonder Woman comics aside from the old Golden/Silver age stuff so it’s good to have read a modern adventure from her. I look forward to the next volume whenever it pops up. Final note, I looked the series up on Comicvine and even though the trade says that it is only 2 issues inside, online it shows up as being the first 13. I guess they were all parts and merged into these issues, but that definitely explains quite a lot.

Overall 7/10

Batman ’66 Meets The Man From U.N.C.L.E. Review

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It’s time for the next Batman ’66 crossover event! This time he is meeting up with the Men from UNCLE which is interesting since I know nothing about the latter. From how they’re portrayed in the comic, I definitely wouldn’t call them heroes. They also seem a little outgunned next to Batman since they don’t really have any gadgets and appear to be only as tough as the average henchman. Still, I suppose they get enough one liners to keep them afloat and it’s a solid comic either way.

The Men from UNCLE are sent to Gotham after every villain in Arkham Asylum is broken out of jail. The company suspects that Bruce Wayne is involved since he has access to the prison and has enough money to pull this off. The Agents are sent into a party so they can keep an eye on him. Meanwhile, Batman and Robin are puzzled as to who could do such a dastardly thing and quickly head to the scene. The party is a great cover for them since they can just act natural. Well, it turns out that all of the villains are now working with T.H.R.U.S.H. THRUSH is an evil organization that is quite large so the 4 heroes are going to have to team up to take them down.

Unfortunately we don’t get our hero against hero fight this time. I feel like it’s because there is no believable way that Napoleon or Illya could do well against Batman. He should completely outclass them even without his gadgets. Still, it would have been fun. The difference is that both agents already know Batman from his reputation and the characters team up from the start. To counter this, I would have liked to have explored the “Bruce Wayne is a traitor” plot a little more but it’s the only real missed opportunity in the comic. The plot is mentioned but immediately abandoned as the villains attack and Bruce slips into his Batman costume. From here on out they assume that Bruce is probably a good guy since he works with Batman.

The comic also shows us how differently the two teams handle a situation. The agents don’t mind getting civilians involved. It puts them at a slight risk but the agents claim that the end justifies the means and so as long as it works they will keep up this tactic. They also use guns and outright murder all of the henchmen they fight. Unfortunately Batman never gets to witness this. Robin does, but he just takes them at their word that it’s simply how they do business. Again, Batman would never work with these guys if he knew the truth. It’s a shame he didn’t find out since that could have led to a pretty fun fight.

The comics go by really quickly so you’ll be sad when it’s all over. It was nice that most of Batman’s villains were able to get squeezed in. Of course, most of them don’t get much of a role but at least they showed up. The big reveal for who the mastermind is won’t surprise anyone who reads the main Batman comics, but I suppose for fans of ’66 it may be surprising. Lets just say that this traitor knows a few things about villains. He can’t really fight though so it’s good that the minions were at the ready.

The art is quite solid as always. I really like Batman’s design and all of the characters stick out quite well. The pages are easy to read and the action scenes are engaging. This just makes a comic that is already solid even better. There are no real weaknesses in this story and a strength is in its writing. The writing is top notch as you would expect with Batman being a total law abiding citizen the whole time and getting his share of one liners. The Men from UNCLE can seem a little overconfident at times but they still seem like good characters. I just happen to be on Team Batman and enjoy him upstaging them the whole time, but it doesn’t take away from their characters. I’d be interested in reading a retro version of their tales as well.

Overall, This crossover is really good despite the Man from UNCLE not being the most exciting team up yet. The best crossover might still be the Green Hornet as that one perfectly showed why having team vs team fights can be so interesting. I really hope DC continues doing more of these crossovers. At the moment I only have 2 left. I have one coming up that is even more obscure so it’ll be nice to learn more about the franchise through the comic. That review should be coming up relatively soon. If you haven’t read this comic yet then you should do so ASAP. It’s just a quality story that is both action packed and humorous at the same time.

Overall 8/10

Halloween Review

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This review is of the edited TV 14 version of the film. All thoughts below should be addressed as such as a review of the unedited version would be more negative.

Uh oh, it’s time for Halloween. It’s one of those iconic films that always makes you feel bad. After all if it did not exist, there’s a chance that we wouldn’t have nearly as many slashers as we have today. I’m sure they would have found a way eventually but it would have bought humanity more time. As it stands, this film did happen and it’s about as terrible as you can imagine. It’s hard to see how the sequels get worse than this one, but where there is a will there’s a way.

The film starts off with two weak willed individuals driving a van into the asylum. The brave guy keeps cutting off his partner and dashes out of the van to use the phone to call the warden. He doesn’t want to park too close so they can drive off faster so it’s a bit of a journey. In the meantime, the other driver notices someone jump on the car. She panics and decides to open the window to let this possible psycho in the car. He obliges her and throws her out so he can have fun making a get away. He proceeds to drive it back home and that’s the opening to our film. The mass murderer who was put away for life got back…because the trained professionals didn’t realize that opening a car door when someone is on the car is not a good move. The asylum is also interesting since the patients have complete free reign to do whatever they want. I suppose the justification is that this place is far removed from humanity so if they try running away they’ll never make it to the next town, but I don’t buy that. It seems like a pretty dangerous idea either way. Try not to think about the opening too much as it’s just foreshadowing for how bad the writing is.

We cut away to the main character, Laurie. She has a few more morals than the rest of the kids in school which makes her an outcast. She has to decide if she wants to stay with the cool crowd or be on her own. Her friend helpfully asks someone to take her to a party at some point and puts Laurie on the spot. That’s when she notices that she’s being followed by someone. Nobody else seems to notice though so Laurie puts it in the back of her mind. Even when a kid tells her he saw someone she laughs it off and drops a few more IQ points. I blame the drugs. It’s a shame that Laurie got into drugs, but it just reminds you that there are no good characters in the film. Will Michael Myers destroy the whole town or just part of it before they catch him?

Where to start right? Well, how about Laurie taking drugs? That was just so random and sad that it made you wonder why the film would do this. Building off of this, the characters are just really bad. Basically they’re portrayed as “mainstream” teenagers who only care about scoring and being the bad kids the adults think they are. Pretty much all of their lines are bad and none of them put up a fight against Myers. They just go down without a fight and their deaths usually last quite a while for extra grit.

The film is definitely pretty violent. Almost every character is choked and stabbed and the deaths just go on and on and on. There is also animal violence here as a dog dies so that definitely didn’t help the film’s situation at all. Honestly it was just another nail in the coffin. The film would have gotten a 0 either way, but it helps it sink down amidst the other 0 titles. It would be interesting to add negative scores, but there wouldn’t be much point and I just do that as a meme once in a while. Why did the film have to pick on the dog? He didn’t ask for this!

It’s also hard to believe that Myers has a lot of super strength and stuff just because he’s a mean guy. The film plays it off as if he is possessed by a demon of sorts which is at least a better explanation than none. Still, the heroes should be able to take him and the guy constantly escaping gets old fast. The “professionals” do a bad job of finding him since he goes just about everywhere in the city and yet they don’t see him. The doctor’s reason for not allowing the main cop to call in backup was terrible as well. Quite a few characters died so would they still be alive if the whole police force had shown up? Given the film we’re talking about I’m sure they would have all been defeated but at least they would have been around. It would at least make sense unlike this scenario where the doctor is basically an accomplice for Myers.

Ugh, you’ll be shaking your head as you watch this film the whole time. There’s nothing fun about it since it’s dark and gritty the whole time. There are no characters to root for and the only good theme in the movie gets played out. It’s catchy and iconic the first time around. It’s passable the next two times it shows up. By the rest of the dozens of times the film uses the theme, you are definitely over it. You can tell that there was a very limited budget since it seems like the film’s whole soundtrack was just made up of that one single song. Pretty underwhelming if you ask me. Unless a theme is completely amazing and one of the best ever, you can’t spam it for every other scene.

Overall, skip this film as fast as possible. The plot is paper thin and you can tell that the writers just wanted to make a slasher film and built the plot around that. Every character is annoying the film takes itself so seriously with the constant dark tone that you just want it to take a break already. The film is quite long so you’ll be here for a while and that’s why it’s impressive that there are basically no good scenes. It’s just edge after edge after edge. Think of any kind of bad scene and this film has probably got it.

Overall 0/10

Ben Review

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It’s time for the sequel to Willard. As you can probably guess, this won’t really end well for the film. The first one had just about everything that you wouldn’t want to see in a film. While this film shows some marginal improvement with a better cast, it’s still so bad that it doesn’t really make a difference. There still aren’t any real positives to speak of so the film can’t really gain any ground. Furthermore, the concept was never good to begin with so it’s not like the film could fall back on its potential.

So, Ben escaped from the proper authorities last time. Now he is back and he has brought an army. The plan is for Ben and his friends to decimate the city and put all of the local grocery/supermarkets out of business. This plan hits a snag when Danny shows up. He’s a nice kid who always wanted to sing, but simply doesn’t have the talent. He has some kind of condition with his heart so it’s hard for him to breath or move all that much. Ben takes pity on him and decides to become friends, but he still has to defend himself from the cops. The cops suspect that something is up, but are too busy with their banter to give it too much extra thought at the moment.

At the very least, it’s nice to see the cops get more of a role. They talk and act with complete seriousness so you know that the threat is real. They arm themselves to the teeth with flame throwers, guns, sticks, and all sorts of weapons. These guys definitely didn’t come to play, they came to win! It’s all part of the plan, but alas it is not that easy. The Rats are smarter than they look and somehow can still compete. It’s almost funny when one guy runs out of the tunnel and informs the chief that they’re losing. By this point there are at least a dozen guys who ran into the sewers with their flame throwers and they’re still losing? I don’t know what to say about that. Once you have a fire weapon, the rats should not be able to break the line. Maybe the guys started to space out or something.

The rats definitely get a lot of hype so the humans are on the defensive for quite a while. At least they still manage to keep secrets from each other so none of them are on the same page. One of them even rubs in the fact that if the rats were a little bigger things would be dicier. Clearly these guys needed more grenades and such. While the climax is a lot more explosive and intense than the first one, it’s still built around animal violence so it’s no better.

As a whole the film was certainly less violent than the first one so that’s nice. It’s still violent enough to issue some warning bells though. Danny also doesn’t work well as a main character. First off, he’s pretty annoying like just about any other kid in a movie. Second, giving him the heart problem just felt like an excuse for some drama and it never added anything into the film. That subplot never should have made it past production. The sister’s insistence on Danny having an imaginary friend was also pretty dicey the whole time since he made it clear that it was real from the start. At first you just assume that she’s covering for him, but she actually ended up believing it. It was awful convenient for the kid that’s for sure.

As for Ben, he is now a family man which is an interesting twist. That being said, he’s not a particularly good one since he ditches his family every day to hang out with Danny. This plot point also felt out of place since it’s completely out of character and makes no sense. I believe the writers felt like it was the only way they could get Danny into the story, but then maybe they shouldn’t have gotten him involved at all. The rest of the film actually wouldn’t change at all and it would have helped a bit. Shorten the run time and increase the focus on the cops. Those are the first steps towards being a bad movie instead of a terrible one.

On a miscellaneous note, I still feel like people aren’t as scared of rats as the film series would have you believe. Sure, people find them kind of creepy and gross so they stay away, but you wouldn’t yell in terror at the mere sight of them. You certainly wouldn’t engage a few hundred of them, but you’d act with some dignity. Once they start biting you you’d run away instead of sitting down and just taking it. Honestly, the pain of getting dozens of bites in an instant should be enough to force you to move on pure instinct alone. I just don’t see a person freezing up even if it is more dramatic. At that point the fear is gone and only the pain remains. Much like when you start this film. You fear what’s going to happen and then once it plays the fear is gone and now you have to endure the terrible songs.

Overall, I’d say that Ben was unfocused. It tried having way too many plot lines and incorporating a bunch of characters even though there was no reason to do so. It should have just been Ben vs the World like you’d think from the posters. We don’t need happy human subplots. Maybe if they toned down the horror aspects it would work, but you shouldn’t do both. The writing isn’t good and there is still a lot of animal violence so at the end of the day you can be sure that this film didn’t fare well for me. It’s a title that you should forget and move on from as soon as possible.

Overall 0/10

Super Mario Odyssey Review

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It’s time for a legendary game. This one got hyped to no end as the big Mario game to end all Mario games. It was in development for ages and the developers were putting a ton of effort into it. That being said, could it live up to the hype? Well, I definitely think Nintendo really outdid themselves this time and it really is one of the best Mario games. It’s probably the third best platformer, after 64 and Sunshine. It has all of the elements that you’d want in a Mario game and even does its best to add in new features.

The plot is fairly basic as Bowser has kidnapped Peach once again and Mario tries to save her. Mario doesn’t act as if it’s an emergency though as he looks rather calm and happy during the cutscenes. Even when he occasionally gets serious, Bowser just one shots him once more and the cycle begins anew. Mario spends a surprising amount of time getting defeated by Bowser in this game. Still, he never gives up so Bowser better prepare for a big confrontation.

There’s a lot to cover here so lets start on the technical side. The graphics look absolutely great. The colors pop out and the level designs are fantastic. There is a little something for everyone here. Whether you want bright, green hills or a more realistic Final Fantasy esque level, this game has got it. There are many worlds and the game makes sure that no 2 worlds look the same. The Switch may not be as strong as some of the other modern consoles, but the game reminds you that you can always make a game look good regardless. A big piece of the puzzle are the character designs and how much time was put into the levels.

The game also has a pretty solid soundtrack. There are many remixes here from the Mario 64 game as well as many of Mario’s older titles. The intense theme for the final Bowser battle was also really good. We can’t forget the big lyrical song during the climax either which was excellent!  There is a lot of music to listen to in this game so make sure you hear it all. While it may not be quite as hardcore or rock based as some other titles, it makes up for this with variety and skill. I’d definitely say that it passes with flying colors in this aspect.

As far as the gameplay is concerned, it plays like your classic Mario platformer. You run, jump, and interact with the level in order to reach the end and get your Stars. (I still call them Moons but all Stars are Moons apparently) One of the big focus for marketing in Odyssey was the cap. With it, Mario can take over anyone, whether it be Yoshi, A T Rex, or a Goomba. Each transformation has a special ability for you to master and they will allow you to get more Stars. It is pretty fun to take control of the enemies which is good since it is often mandatory to complete levels and take down bosses. The game was built around this system and it worked out well. I dare say that as a gimmick it probably does beat Fludd, even if Fludd was the more likable character.

That being said, you will also feel relieved whenever you have a mini level without the cap. It feels nice and retro and you have to rely on your platforming skills. There are also actual retro levels where you turn into your 16 bit version and play through more small levels. They are a nice distraction from the main levels and the different gameplay styles are all handled quite well. I can’t say this enough times but Odyssey was clearly developed with a lot of passion and effort.

The world variety is quite strong. There are a few spooky worlds like the Ruined Kingdom or the one with the Large Dragon. Then you’ve got the amazing Mario 64 homage which does an amazing job of recreating the classic Peach castle. There are also a few post game worlds that I have yet to unlock which are sure to be a blast as well. Start saving up your money from the start because it will really come in handy for buying all of the stars that are at the shop. There are likely hundreds of them to buy there.

There are also fun mini games to play like jumping rope, Volleyball, or connecting a puzzle. Going for a high score and trying to master them is sure to be entertaining. They’re pretty fun games.
Since there are over 900 stars, you’ll want to inspect every part of each world. Stars are basically around every corner and it’s up to you to find them all. Toad is available to give you a hint for 50 coins but I recommend not doing so until you’ve bought all of the stars and not until you’ve gotten as many stars as you could for the world. It would be a shame to waste 50 coins on a game you probably could have found yourself.

I suppose I should reference the ending right? Well, there isn’t a whole lot to say on that end for me. It’s a classic Mario ending although longtime fans may not appreciate it. It’s essentially Nintendo’s way of reassuring fans that they will always get the Mario that they grew up with. It won’t change and get older as they do and in a way that’s what a lot of fans will also want to see. At the very least, Mario got a good shot in at Bowser.

Well, unlike some games that are overhyped to no end, I can definitely see why some would call this the greatest game of all time or why they would at least put it into the conversation. I mean, there’s really not much more Nintendo can do with the concept or the genre. It’s basically been taken to its absolute limits here and that’s pretty impressive. While I personally don’t put it in the conversation for best game of all time since Super Smash has that without a doubt, I can definitely say that it should be in the conversation for best platformer of all time. I’m fairly confident that Nintendo also won’t be able to top this for quite a long time. Perhaps not until the next console.

There is a ton of replay value here. While you’ll beat the game with around 200 stars or less if you didn’t travel much, then you still have around 700 to go. It’s an incredible amount of stars to be sure. While a lot of them you have to purchase from the shop, money isn’t an issue. I suppose if you’ve been buying a ton of hints then it’ll be a little difficult for you though. Try not to buy them until you’ve gotten the easy ones first or the hint will essentially be a waste. You can also try to get high scores in the minigames and on the way to getting all of the stars you’ll get a bunch of costumes. I have no doubt that this is a 20+ hour game when you consider all of this and that might be severely low balling the amount.

Now for some miscillanius thoughts. I didn’t care much for the Broodals. They’re not bad I suppose, but they feel like absolute throwaway characters. I dare say that the Deadly Six from Lost World were cooler since at least the leader was good. That’s a start in the right direction. I didn’t talk much about the boss battles but they were all pretty solid. The Mario vs Bowser ones in particular are very satisfying, but another really good boss battle is when you’re zooming through the air with your water powers and stopping the fire octopus. The only missed opportunity in the game is that you can’t play New Donk City at night once you stop the monster. The scenery was awesome in the dark and the rain just amplified this affect. You just can’t win them all though and day-time New Donk is still as hype as it gets.

Overall, Mario Odyssey is certainly a must buy. I’m definitely glad that I ended up grabbing a Switch so I could pick this game up. I know that it might be fighting with Breath of the Wild over the Game of the Year award but personally I think Odyssey destroys it many times over with no real effort. you can’t even compare the two in my mind, but granted I didn’t enjoy Breath of the Wild quite as much as most. I only thought it was a good game while I consider this one to be an elite. If you haven’t checked Odyssey out yet, then you should fix that right away!

Overall 9/10

Willard Review

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It’s time for one of those films that you know will be bad from the start. It has Rats in it which is a problem since it’ll lead to animal violence and the main character is super whiny. You can barely ask for a worse combination to start the film off with. Add in the gratuitous violence and you’ve got yourself another 0 to roll with. There are no redeeming factors in this movie so we may as well just jump in.

The film starts off with Willy heading home when he’s cornered by his boss (Al) and a co-worker. They mock Willy for a while because he forgot his papers once again and then they drive off. Willy is part of the sales department so he has to get the orders or the company can’t earn money. He doesn’t seem to care though because he only gives everything 10% of his effort. Any more than that and he would actually have to try. His father used to own the company but Al helped expedite his death with business pressure and took over the company. Willy’s family says that he should try to take the company back, but that doesn’t seem possible in his current state. If anything, it seems like he may be getting fired if he doesn’t clean up his act. Willy decides to start taking care of some rats in his spare time. Not out of any noble gestures, but so that he can satisfy his inferiority complex by being superior to something, in this case the rats. Willy goes on his power trips right away and edges closer to insanity. Will he live through this?

In case you couldn’t tell, I didn’t like Willard from the beginning. I never found him sympathetic because a lot of his failings on the job seem like his fault. Even if he has a lot of work I want to see him put an effort into finishing it. If he was truly overworked, I would have liked for the film to give some evidence on that. We know Al doesn’t like Willard, but we don’t know that the work was too much for the guy. He didn’t handle any of the situations well either. The party scene is a good example of this as he just leaves instead of talking things out with the guests. They didn’t seem all that reasonable, but Willard basically just lets everyone walk all over him until he snaps. He is all about extremes with no middle ground. Willard also takes his frustration out on the rats which essentially makes him no better than Al. It’d be nice if he could see that, but that wasn’t in the cards. Willy is essentially a bully as well so there’s no rooting for the guy. He murders and yells at rats just to satisfy his ego.

I was actively rooting against him, but the problem is that there aren’t really any characters to root for. The main heroine is the only decent character and even she can be a bit odd. Buying Willard a cat out of the blue is not something you do. I think it’s fair to say that a lot of people aren’t looking for a pet and couldn’t just accept such a responsibility out of the blue. Still, she meant well at least so I’m glad the film let her go without getting eaten or something.

Al’s the main villain and he’s a pretty mean guy. He likes humiliating Willard and getting the last laugh. He pushes the main character around for quite a while until plot hax sets in. Willard breaks in with his rat army which is cool and all, but Al could have just pushed through the door and ran off. The rats could chase him, but it would be tough to down the guy. Instead…he just stands still and begs for mercy. It works well if this was Willard’s big delusion as he finally gets his revenge on everyone, but it’s hard to see it all going so smoothly.

Then Willard’s neighbors turn out to be burglars who like stealing everything. It was a pretty intriguing subplot and she still beat a lot of the other characters. In another subplot, Willard wants to keep his mansion as a matter of pride even though he isn’t earning enough money to support it. Now this is just selfish as he goes around asking for money when there is no way he will be able to return it. He should have just gotten a smaller house and a lot of the issues here could have been resolved.

As for other factors that doomed the movie, there is a considerable amount of animal violence here. Rats are smashed, stabbed, and drowned. It’s unfortunate that Rats are always used for all of these vile experiments. Even in real life everything is tested on them and I somehow don’t think they were treated well in this film. I try not to think about those aspects while watching, but the actor does throw quite a few of them around at various points and since they were using live rats throughout the film, it just doesn’t bode well. The whole film is just very distasteful and mean spirited. Even the Rats banding together and murdering everyone by the end isn’t fun because it’s just continuing the mean cycle. Sure, they got their revenge through more violent scenes, but where’s the happy ending? I’m glad Willard didn’t get a happy ending since he didn’t deserve one, but after a while there’s just no high road for the film to take.

Overall, another issue is that this film also feels like it goes on forever. It just keeps on going and going. Since I didn’t like the characters, that only made the feeling even worse. I don’t know what else to say except that you should absolutely avoid this film. Even as far as horror films go, this one is quite terrible. It’s only good for taking a nap since it’ll put you to sleep. I suppose it can be good as a coaster, but then you’d have to see the cover every time you reach for your drink and that would get brutal very quickly. So, you’re better off just staying out of this film’s way and forgetting that it exists.

Overall 0/10