Suggested by Destroyer Garfield has been around for a very long time. He’s gotten tons of comics and a lot of toon force at the ready. He’s never shown any super impressive feats though so I don’t think he’s bullet proof. That means he is out of luck against someone as powerful as Howard. “Powerful” isn’t usually how I would describe someone like Howard but as long as he has the gun at the ready he should be just fine in this matchup. Howard Aguello wins.
Suggested by Destroyer The One Above All is not someone you want to take lightly. This is a battle I had to think about for a little while because Lubba isn’t ordinarily much of a fighter either. It definitely makes things a bit interesting but even so, every fight must have a victor. Ultimately I’m going with Lubba on this one. He can levitate/fly a bit and can tackle the One Above All that way. The One Above All doesn’t look like his punches would deal a whole lot of damage so Lubba should have the edge if they trade blows. Lubba wins.
Suggested by Sonic This is a very classic case of power vs speed. King Goomba is absolutely stronger than Piantissimo but I’m just wondering if he will even be able to damage the guy. Piantissimo is fast so it’s unlikely that he will be hit. He should also be strong enough to land damage to King Goomba considering that jut making contact with him is enough to damage Mario. This won’t be a stomp, but Piantissimo’s speed will win him the day. II Piantissimo wins.
Suggested by Sonic Inspector Gadget has a lot of great gadgets but they will be a double edged sword against Bullseye. Bullseye can turn anything into a deadly weapon so if he gets ahold of these items, then that’s game over. Additionally, Bullseye already has quite a lot of tools of his own which he could use to take down Gadget. Gadget isn’t particularly fast or experienced so that will be the end of him. Bullseye wins.
Suggested by Sonic Katniss is a very impressive archer to be sure. She can fire an arrow far more efficiently than most fighters. That said, Catwoman has a good amount of speed and solid reflexes. She won’t be getting hit and would easily dominate the fight in close quarters combat. There’s not a whole lot Katniss can do to defend herself against such an opponent. Ultimately she will be outmatched. Catwoman wins.
Suggested by Sonic Longshot has a lot of good luck and some decent speed as well but that just won’t be enough against the Shocker. The Shocker doesn’t have much in the way of super abilities but his gauntlets continue to grow more and more powerful as the years go on. A single shot would take Longshot out and it’s hard to avoid an attack with such impressive range. That’s why I have to count Longshot out here, ultimately he will be tagged and defeated. Shocker wins.
Suggested by Sonic I’m definitely not a fan of Space Dandy. He’s absolutely not the captain that you want to have at the ready when you’re going into battle. Kirk’s certainly a better leader but unfortunately he doesn’t have the speed needed to keep up with Dandy. Space Dandy would be able to blast Kirk several times with his blaster before the guy would be able to properly react. Space Dandy wins.
It’s time to look at the big sequel! Grumpier Old Men really picks up where the last one left off. In a lot of ways I would say it’s just like the original and has the same strengths and weaknesses. As to which film was better, well I would say the first has the slight edge for me. It’s just better in each area and yes even the romance is better than in this film. I’m afraid that is the weakness of the title yet again.
The movie starts with John and Max still having their friendly competitions although I would say they’re on better terms than usual. Their kids are getting ready to be married and so things couldn’t be better. Unfortunately their lives take a twist when the owner of the bait shop dies and Maria moves in. She has decided that the area will be a restaurant instead and Max doesn’t like that. He decides that he will do whatever it takes to ensure her business is not a success. He will sabotage it at every turn until she surrenders. John is willing to help him on this so for once you’ve got both characters teaming up against a new antagonist.
I would say one of the big issues here is that the film has absolutely no idea what it is doing. The whole main plot with Maria deciding to open a restaurant instead of the bait shop was a solid premise. We could now have a good battle with the heroes uniting to take her on yet the movie moves on from this premise early on into a series of unrelated events that don’t really connect much. By the end we do get one fake out involving a wedding but there just isn’t a lot of focus to the movie and it squanders all of its potential.
That’s why the opening scenes are the best ones with the heroes pulling pranks on Maria. It made for a nice montage and again, it was just nice to see some unity between them. They united to fight a common enemy and Maria seemed like someone who would fight back rather well. That could have been the premise for the entire film but unfortunately Maria gives up almost immediately when nobody goes to her restaurant on opening day. I have to assume this was due to John and Max’s interference unless they were right and people wouldn’t travel here to eat.
So Maria tries to seduce Max which doesn’t work but Ariel says she’ll help out. Okay so we have a new plot premise here. A 2 on 2 battle with John and Max fighting Maria and Ariel. That could be a lot of fun and Ariel knows them really well so you can see how there could be a lot of back and forth here. A bit different from the first premise but it could absolutely work. Only Ariel is a non factor after this scene. Her only contribution is to tell John to go over and apologize or else. She even kicks him out of the house in the meantime.
So John heads on over and is promptly defeated so maybe under Ariel’s orders John will be forced to team up with Maria to stop Max? This premise might even make the most amount of sense since it gives us an excuse to have the two characters fighting again. There’s a lot of mileage there but the film doesn’t go with this either. Instead it’s at this point where the film gets more dramatic and we find out that Maria likes Max just like how he likes her. From there the battle is completely over. The restaurant is almost never brought up again and we transition to more about the kids’ romance plot and the characters getting to know each other.
Or as I call it, the plot ends here. They foiled Maria (Since she relents about the bait) and her plans so the movie ended here. The issue is that it was too soon so that’s why the rest of the story elements are brought in. It’s a shame too since all it does is drag Jacob and Melanie back down. So from the last film she agreed to rebound with Jacob and he was thrilled since he always had a crush on her. Well, the marriage is super close but at the last second Melanie gets cold feet and wants to push it back while Jacob starts hurling insults in a moment of weakness. Just like that, the wedding is off. The plot point is so meaningless that this is reversed very quickly.
The two characters just aren’t likable though and if their romance is already failing then I don’t see it lasting past the winter. As mentioned, the main romance is also really bad though. You mean to tell me that Maria genuinely fell for the guy who was going out of his way to sabotage her career and humiliate her? Keep in mind that she put all of her money into this venture so she could easily turn out to be bankrupt before long. I don’t care if Max was rocking an 8 pack, she is not going to fall for him under this scenario.
At least for the bar scene she was trying to manipulate him but it wasn’t real yet. After that somehow she did fall for him and the whole romance plot is a mess. Then for a “comedic” subplot we have her mother falling for John’s father and the whole thing will make you cringe. That guy’s one of the worst characters and I don’t know why this film decided to give him more of a role. It definitely wasn’t worth it I can tell you that much. Any scene with him and Maria’s mother was just brutal.
The film can also be a bit obnoxious with the fanservice. The whole scene with Maria at the bar was painful and certainly didn’t contribute to the story as a whole. The writing can still be good with the banter even if the script isn’t always great. The characters certainly have a bit of a one track mind most of the time with how desperate they are. It’s a good thing Maria doesn’t mind with how loudly Max was singing about her during the boat scene. The jaded part of you will almost think she was desperate for Max because of how he sabotaged her business and she needs to stay afloat somehow. This will apparently be her 6th marriage which is a whole lot of relationships in her past. Another reason why I have my doubts about this romance working.
Take away the romance and Maria’s a good character. I just wish we could have stayed with her being the antagonist because that would have been way more interesting. She seemed tough enough to hold her own and that would have just made for a really engaging plot. Meanwhile Ariel really disappears from the movie for the most part so don’t expect a lot out of her. John and Max are the same as ever. They bicker a whole lot and have their usual battles but not as much as in the first film. Their kind of dialogue is still similar and is the catchiest part of the film. It really wouldn’t be the same without their battles.
Overall, I thought the film took some different turns from how it appeared to be going at the beginning. As a result the second half of the film can feel completely aimless at times. I’ll give the movie credit for the wedding twist near the end but otherwise I just couldn’t give this film a whole lot of props. At the same time, it was entertaining and really ended in a flash so it got more things right than wrong. If you enjoyed the first film you ought to enjoy this one and vice versa. If we ever get a remake though, it should keep the “Vs” premise from start to finish.
Overall 6/10
With a title like this you can immediately tell what the film’s going to be like and that’s a credit to the title. No misdirects here, the film is as advertised. I’d say it works well enough, I like the banter between the two characters and their never ending fights. The weakest part of the film is definitely the romantic angle though. We have the triangle with the main characters fighting over the new girl in town as well as a romance between their kids. Both romances really only serve to undercut the solid comedy.
The movie starts by introducing us to John and Max. Both of them are older in years and have remained single. John is close to defaulting on his house though as the IRS gets closer and closer every day. Still, how can you hope to dodge those guys forever right? Then Max just enjoys his day to day life with some fishing but out of nowhere they get a neighbor named Ariel. She seems to be quite the free spirit and in this dead neighborhood of senior citizens the characters are all excited. Mainly John and Max who each decide to claim her. Who will win this rivalry once and for all?
Lets start with the positives here. The rivalry between John and Max is fun. For the most part you don’t feel like they ever take things too far aside from one moment when Max nearly causes John to drown. For the most part their pranks are just to annoy each other and they tend to succeed at that. It’s kind of nice to think about two neighbors that have been fighting with each other for over 60 years. At the very least it gives them a constant in their life since every day they know they have to be ready to win. They’ll still have each other’s backs at times though.
From the two characters I would lean on Max being my favorite. He’s just a bit of a tougher character who doesn’t beat around the bush. He doesn’t back down easy and even gets the IRS guy at one point. For John, well he tries his best as well but you feel like Max usually wins both the verbal and physical fights. Max even moves quicker when it counts although ultimately you can see John being the nicer guy. He’ll be the bigger man and walk away from a fight much sooner than Max would.
As for Ariel, well it does feel like she is leading on both characters to an extent. Now she just likes having fun which is fair to say except I don’t think that accounts for some things like the snowmobile rides with Max right after John dumped her and just seemingly trying to make him jealous. That’s why you aren’t rooting for either character in the romance since in the end it doesn’t feel all that genuine. If Ariel went with Max it would feel like a rebound. Meanwhile John was willing to break up with her to make Max feel better which to me makes it feel like their romance was never all that strong. It’s a lose-lose situation. Ariel also feels a lot younger than the main two characters although it could easily just be that she takes much better care of herself.
Both guys also just look really bad in their pursuit of her. Right from the start all they can think of it getting with her. They barely seem to see her as a person and just purely as a trophy. That’s the way the rest of the town seems to feel as well aside from the town owner. That’s definitely not a credit to the town as a whole. Then you have the other romance which is even worse. Max’s kid Jacob likes Melanie, he has ever since second grade. She admits that she would mess with him by leaving the windows open which already seems petty but now that she is prepping for a divorce, Jacob knows its his time to be the quick rebound.
The issue is that the old guy (Forget his name) returns real quick and Melanie is willing to have him over immediately. So Jacob is left in the cold again but once the guy leaves, she is willing to be with Jacob. That’s almost the definition of a rebound. Jacob only got a chance because the other guy was getting drunk and was not dependable. Jacob shouldn’t feel too thrilled about that because now he will always know that he was not the first pick. He’s the second string player coming off the bench because the lead got injured. That’s not a good foundation for a proper romance and I always have my doubts about this working out.
So I didn’t care much for either romance plot. The romance is also a rather big part of the story so it’s hard to say that you should ignore it entirely as well. To do that would be to skip most of the film. That said, it definitely does lower the score by a point. Additionally while the writing can be fun for the banter and all, I wouldn’t say it’s always great. There are definitely enough lines that will make you shake your head that keep me from calling it a top tier title or anything like that either. It’s good enough to give you some smiles and keep the movie moving at a good pace. That’s enough for this to be a good movie, it feels like something is always happening here.
Overall, Grumpy Old Men is a film that is probably better than it would be if it was remade in the modern day. I’ve seen trailers for similar kinds of films that always look pretty bad. At the very least this one seems classy most of the time which is the important thing. It’s a rather light hearted film with some good characters and that’s really all you can ask for. If the premise sounds entertaining then I think you will like it. After all, a good deal of the film depends on how entertaining you find the banter to be between the two characters and fortunately that is the strongest part of the film. I will have the review of the sequel up fairly soon as well to compare if it is able to keep the same level of energy.
Overall 6/10
The Hallmark channel has always had a great record when it comes to churning out solid Christmas films. This one is no different and makes for a good experience from start to finish. The film has good pacing, writing, and just ends on the right note. If anything the only element this film lacked was more Christmas snacks since the films usually give that quite the spotlight. Maybe next time and either way as long as the story is good that’s more of a bonus anyway.
The movie introduces us to Ethan who has always done things the right way while he watches his colleague Doyle take shortcuts at every opportunity. Ethan has always been proud of who he is, but lately he feels like he made the wrong choice by being a good person. He’s been stuck in the same job for 10 years while Doyle continues to move up and Ethan’s house is even super beat up. The last straw is when he makes a deal with a nearby newsstand owner instead of chasing her off the property. Now his promotion may be in jeopardy. In a moment of weakness Ethan makes a wish to go back to the moment in time when he first made the good guy move and instead to make the wrong one. Well Santa decides to humor him and so Ethan wakes up in this new world. In this world Ethan is super rich and is even the co-owner of the company. Ethan’s convinced that his life is now perfect and this shows that he made the right call all along. Is he right though?
Of course it’s nice to be rich but since Ethan met his wife on the elevator since he skipped the first one, this new timeline means they never met. That also means he never adopted the two kids and they are still at the orphanage currently. So Ethan’s new status came at a big price. Of course the moral here is to do the right thing and he should go back to his family. It’s a good moral although I almost feel like Ethan could have had his cake and ate it too in the end.
So in this film Ethan is unable to go back to the main timeline until he lives this period out through Christmas and discovers what he is lacking. At that point he will lose his memories of the old life although he keeps his new personality based on what we see. During the course of the movie he is able to win over his wife Joyce once again to the point where they are going out. So if he stays in this world he can still end up marrying her only this time he is rich and she got the degree that she wanted.
In this timeline her mother seemingly never got injured either. So the only loss here is that the kids are adopted by someone else already although their parents are clearly good people so at least there’s that. They still have a good life ahead of them and now Ethan can use his newfound money and power to make the city a better place. It’s a rather tempting offer to stay in the new world and enjoy it. Ethan will also get his memories of the new timeline back presumably which should help him not have to bluff everything anymore. He would have lost around 13 years of events from his family life though and he can’t get those back.
So it’s an interesting idea but of course it makes sense why he would want to go back. It also makes for a fun ending as we’ll see if everyone believes in his new story or if they think he just went crazy or was having a dream. All of those options are fairly reasonable since believing in a magic Santa would be tough. Also, he will have a more difficult time proving it since in the new world he could at least mention things he shouldn’t know. In this world though? Not really an easily solution like that.
Ethan was a fun character throughout. He did a good job of being a leader and really made everyone around him better. Then you have Joyce who was good in both continuities. As a lawyer she did a good job standing up for the youth center and ultimately pushing through until she could claim victory. Rona was the big boss in the original dimension and she’s a nice character. Ultimately she became really successful on her own and while she may have overlooked some dealings beneath her, she was someone who would look out for the little guy. She really came in clutch during the climax of the film since the heroes were nearly defeated. That said, it was a big mistake on Ethan’s part to forget that he was rich in this world.
Finally you have Doyle who serves as the main villain in this film. He’s an absolutely ruthless business man who will cut any corners and pressure anyone if it means that he gets his way. In a way Doyle seemed to even have more power than Ethan despite being co-owners. It was fun seeing Ethan pull a fast one on him during their TV appearance though. I was glad Doyle didn’t get off too easy here since he really did cause a lot of damage and destruction the whole time.
Of course we get some fun Christmas songs here as well. The soundtrack is on point and there’s also a lot of nice scenery. It makes for a very pleasant watch. The writing is good like you would expect and the movie really flies on by. Ethan has to overcome his own issues by the end of the film but you never feel like any character goes too far. The closest the film goes to having pointless drama is when Doyle nearly tricks Joyce into turning on Ethan. Fortunately that didn’t work but if it had that would have felt like a bit much because there’s no reason to trust Doyle at this point.
Overall, A Kiss Before Christmas is definitely a solid movie. It’s definitely a fun one to watch as you get close to Christmas. I have to say that Santa didn’t seem very heroic in this film though. At one point he starts messing with Ethan’s mind even before the Christmas deadline has appeared. That felt like he was hitting way below the belt since that’s not supposed to have happened to soon. Fortunately his attempt did not work but the characters should definitely be careful around him.
Overall 7/10
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