Category Archives: Reviews

Ocean’s 8 Review

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It’s been a while since I saw the original Ocean films so it was time to check out the spinoff. I do enjoy a good heist film like this where it’s not about breaking in with guns and taking everyone out but using a lot of trickery and deception to get to the bottom of things. It’s certainly weaker than the main installments but makes for a good film overall. You shouldn’t have too many issues with the execution.

The movie introduces us to Debbie who has finally gotten out of jail after 10 years. She has promised not to commit any more crimes but can’t help herself. She wants revenge on the guy who got her into jail and wants to make some money on the side. Her objective is to steal a super fancy necklace. To do this she’s going to need to form a whole team. Her main partner Lou is ready for this but they still need 6 more people. It’s time to go recruiting and then the game is on. Can they really outwit the insurance team as well as the people who are in charge of keeping the necklace safe? It’ll take all they got.

As with most ensemble films like this the movie’s first act is mainly about getting the team together. Each character is good at a different task so once they have the team assembled then they’re ready to move out. It’s a tried and true formula which works out pretty well. The characters are decent although there are few standout characters. Then we move to the actual heist which is always a lot of fun because of how much planning goes into that. The real question is always, do you buy into it?

Well, I think most of it works out rather well. Mainly due to the twist of the heroes covering their bases by the end of the film. Without that final twist the whole thing would have blown up and been completely unbelievable. With it, there’s only a few parts that break the case I would say. One is that the necklace was secured so that it could not be removed so easily. Because of this, I don’t see how anyone would believe for a second that it just fell to the floor during the party. It actually would have been easier to just slip the replacement necklace on at that point. Initially I thought the plan was going in a different direction but the whole “I found it in the water” excuse didn’t really fly. I also doubt it would have had the same kind of lock installed so the company would have realized something was wrong from the start.

The other issue here is when the heroes get greedy at the end and start stealing everything. Really guys? That last move would sabotage everything. Put it this way, they now all had to drive off in a big getaway vehicle that was caught on camera. What if the detectives decided to search the vehicle? When you add that onto the fact that Debbie is already a wanted criminal then you’ve definitely got a big issue here. Fortunately they got a certain inspector on the case but things could have easily gotten dicey there.

Those are the two reasons why I don’t think the whole heist would have gone over very smoothly but otherwise I thought the adventure worked out well enough. The film’s pacing is pretty decent. The writing is okay but it does have a tough balance to fill with the humor and heist aspects at times. For example, some of the characters here really aren’t very well prepared to handle a heist so what happens is there will be a lot of gags for the audience like the characters being obvious about what they’re doing but then in universe is raises quite a lot of questions. Again, the film’s final twist does help with this a bit though. The dialogue itself is also decent for the most part but you feel like it could have been a lot better. One thing I would have liked to see was more discussion on planning the heist rather than Debbie setting everything up off screen. The heist itself is a lot of fun though which is always the main goal here.

Debbie is the leader of the crew and the main character so she is the one coming up with all of the plans. She does pretty well at making sure everything is thought through and you do understand why she wants to squeeze the revenge in there as well even if it does ultimately put the whole thing into jeopardy. She could have easily destroyed all of their hopes and dreams with this. After all, the guy could have turned the tables had he not fallen for every trap so obviously. There’s no real excusing the second scene where he receives a call at a very convenient time and still goes to her house to have an affair even though he should know that he’s being framed. He was literally given all kinds of information and Debbie even revealed herself just to rub his nose in the situation. Any halfway decent intelligent character would have figured something was out so Debbie’s risk was pretty huge here. She’s a solid character but not a good leader.

Lou was Debbie’s main ally and certainly the one who got the biggest role here. She was solid and helped to keep the lead grounded most of the time. She’s also got a lot of talents which helps her blend into the role really well. Amita came in handy for the jewel cutting which was one of the most crucial parts. Tammy was fun as one of the more down to earth characters who had a pretty content life before getting mixed up in all of this. If anything she should have said no since the risks heavily outweighed the rewards here.

Constance was one of the standout characters here since her sleight of hand is quite impressive. Without those abilities the plan would have to be dramatically altered. Nine Ball gives the team the tech advantage they would need for this case. She’s not as solid as the other characters but does well when needed. The weakest link is definitely Rose though. She’s the old art dealer who helps out with getting the necklace but she is not good at the criminal game and really puts everyone at risk. Then you have Daphne who is a main focus here since the heroines are trying to manipulate her into being in the right place at the right time. She’s much more self absorbed than most of the other characters but does come off as one of the more likable ones. I was also glad she was shown to be a little more intelligent than she would let on.

Overall, Ocean’s 8 is a good movie. It has more positives than negatives. It may ultimately feel a lot weaker than the main one so if you compare them directly then this will lose out but on its own I would still say it’s worth a watch. I’d certainly be down with a sequel as well. That said, the movie should be a little more careful with its title. If you’re paying attention to that then you’ll know more about the film than you’re supposed to. All while it’s playing you’ll be counting to 8 and so if the numbers don’t match up….well it’s something to think about. I was surprised the ending didn’t have some kind of big reveal or plot twist for the climax but I suppose they didn’t want to tip their hand in case we don’t get another film. Perhaps that is for the best but I have to say it would have been a hype way to end things off and an improvement on the ending. The ending was satisfactory though.

Overall 6/10

You Only Live Twice Review

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Bond’s adventures continue with some more espionage and thriller elements. Here’s the thing for Bond though, he’s been relying on luck for quite a while now so what happens when it runs out? That’s something Bond’s going to have to think about here as the leader of SPECTRE finally gets to appear. Ultimately this film is more of the same in many respects. It is going for a new element by having Bond stay in Japan for a while but I would say the core of the film is basically the same.

The movie starts with Bond having yet another affair. This one ends a little differently than most as the girl quickly calls in her goons and they all shoot Bond down. Seeing Bond get murdered within the opening minutes was definitely a chilling experience. After Bond gets back into the sub where we find out he faked his death, he is given a new mission. Some kind of space creature/machine has been eating up every rocket sent into space. The U.S. thinks Russia did it while Russia is blaming them. Bond has to find out who the true culprit is before World War III commences. The heroes believe the rocket may have originated from Japan so that’s where Bond is going. Will he be able to crack the case?

I don’t think anyone honestly thought for a second that Bond died in the opening scene but it definitely would have been a pretty interesting twist I gotta say. His distractions would have finally cost him everything. This film is not kind to Bond for the most part though. He looks pretty bad as expected but not just physically here. Lets start with what had to be the most entertaining scene in the film. Bond is faced off with one of the big villains and they slowly start to walk towards each other.

Sizing each other up and all. Then the guy just throws out a punch real suddenly that knocks Bond for a loop. Bond was completely unprepared for the punch and you would have thought that it wouldn’t have been a surprise since a fight was about to start. I guess his reaction times just weren’t on point. Then there’s the fact that he is still confident as ever so he doesn’t mind his surroundings anymore. He meets with one of the big suspects and just assumes he can casually leave.

If not for the heroine showing up in time he would have been gunned in the back without suspecting a thing. There’s another scene where his informant is stabbed to death while Bond was having his drink. You can’t blame him for that one but at least he knows to watch his back because the enemies are everywhere right? Well, that’s not exactly the case either. Bond goes to sleep real quick later on and nearly gets poisoned to death if not for the heroine stepping in once again. This really isn’t Bond’s best day but he hasn’t had one of those in a while so it’s not too surprising.

The action scenes are okay when they happen but I wouldn’t say there are a whole lot of them in this film. The movie tries an interesting sky view for one of the larger action scenes but I wouldn’t say it works particularly well. It feels less like a battle and when the villains jump backwards it doesn’t even seem like Bond connects with them. The Japan backdrop for the movie was nice but they definitely didn’t paint the place in a really flattering light. Bond’s liaison there goes out of his way to say that women are second over here and has what equates to a bunch of female servants working for him. This is one of the heroes we’re supposed to root for eh? Bond fits right in with all of these guys.

You Only Live Twice has more dead time than the average Bond film so at times things can almost get a little dull. I’d hesitate to say that the movie actually gets boring at any points but I would say that it is just a bit more aimless than some of the others. I also thought the countries looked pretty awful just sending their rockets up without a plan. Maybe the first time but sending it again after the others were captured and you don’t even give the pilots guns? The whole thing just made SPECTRE look good of course but at the expense of everyone else.

The leader was decent even if he’s not very smart. You’d think that as the big boss he would have everything going according to plan but Bond plays him like a fiddle. Aki does well as the main heroine and is one of the better ones in the Bond films. That being said, while she does make Bond look poor in comparison with how she keeps on saving him, she also hurt’s Bond’s character further. After the villains get to her Bond wastes almost 0 time in going for the next girl so once again you see how he doesn’t take anyone seriously.

In a way this feels like it should end the SPECTRE arc. I suppose the villain got away but at this point he won’t have the same mysterious aura anymore. Well, I suppose hopefully he can come up with another good plan. This bond film suffers from poor romance, fanservice, and an unlikable cast so the rest of the review would be rather par for the course. It could be a while til the next Bond film but at least as of this point you can’t say that Bond forgot its fundamentals. It delivered consistent performances through and through.

Overall, You Only Live Twice is definitely a pretty interesting title. Bond does act like he has multiple lives most of the time so it’s pretty fitting. As always I feel like the Bond films would be so much better if they would focus on the secret agent stuff and leave Bond’s hobbies alone. Have him act professional once in a while even if it’s just to be a change of pace. I dare say that would go quite a long way. Maybe the Bond films will be able to do this in the future or at least that’s the hope.

Overall 4/10

Samurai Warriors 2: XTreme Legends Review

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It’s been a very long time since I played the original Samurai Warriors. I had been focusing on Dynasty for a while but now that I’m caught up with that series it was definitely time to go and check out how this one was doing. Well, it’s definitely a game that has aged really well. You can feel the power behind your attacks and taking down hundreds of opponents all at once certainly never gets old. I definitely look forward to playing the next installment in this series soon.

As with most warrior games you can pick whose story you want to play through. There aren’t a whole lot of options initially but I believe you can unlock more characters as you play through. I played as Kojiro Sasaki. I always like to pick the fire type fighters in these and since Yukimura Sanada wasn’t an option yet I figured this could do the trick. That said, he’s certainly more of an antagonist than I would have figured. Effectively he just wants to destroy a bunch of people but he feels like it’s all a waste. He wants to find someone super powerful to destroy so he goes around on the battlefield until he finds such a person.

I did not warm up to this guy by the end. He’s definitely crazy but would make for a solid antagonist to someone else’s story. At the very least you can’t deny that the guy has some pretty serious skill here. It’s his story so his abilities probably get embellished a bit but he ends up taking everyone out.

The gameplay is fairly standard of course. You go around beating the life points out of all your opponents. You have your standard moves, power moves, and your super attack. I recommend keeping your super on hand for whenever an opponent general shows up because it works as an immediate combo breaker. Just activate it when the opponent lands any kind of hit on you and you’ll be set. The gameplay is very smooth and landing hits is fun. To add some depth here you can power up your weapon at the shop and even buy special abilities that amp up your stats or even control your level ups.

I recommend spending all of your money on this because it’s just a great way to keep your guy ready for action. Your weapon’s important too but the upgrade doesn’t seem to do a whole lot there. The only part of the gameplay where you can tell they haven’t fine tuned it yet is the speed. Your character walks incredibly slow throughout the levels. So it can take a while to get anywhere. I suppose this helps to prevent you from running straight to the goal though. It also adds a little strategy here because moving too far away from your camp is dangerous as a result. After all if your leader dies then you lose the mission instantly.

The game had 5 levels in the campaign I played and I believe it can go up to 7 in some cases as well. It’s fairly short if you’re just playing one character and you should have it beat in around 2 hours. If you do it with all of the characters though then this definitely ought to take a long while. You have no shortage of replay value in this game which is no surprise because that is often the case with any game in the Dynasty franchise. Considering that the games go for around 10-20 bucks now, it’s a good bargain.

The graphics look pretty good here. I always appreciate the fact that there are loads of cutscenes and cinematics everywhere. You’ve got the big budget ones which appear at the beginning and end as well as the mini ones that show up whenever an enemy officer appears. It helps to make these moments feel like a big deal. The attack animations are also on point. As for the soundtrack it’s a little more on the forgettable side but it’s not bad. I’d like to have had more of a signature theme show up at some point. That would have been neat but maybe in the sequel.

The game is reasonably challenging. In particular what makes it pretty tricky here is how long the levels are. If you’ve already polished off about 600 enemies then nothing will be more disheartening than losing at the last second right? There were a few levels where I just had to run for a while to look for health items. The nice sweet spot to be in is when your health is in the red since you can use unlimited super attacks as long as you run a bit. That’s also a good strategy but they take time and it gets pretty intense. You know that a hit could be the end for you. That’s a fun feeling when you come out on top. Fortunately I didn’t end up losing here but that could have been tricky.

Samurai Warriors 2 feels very basic in a lot of respects but it’s part of the charm. You have a pretty direct plot and a lot of good gameplay for each level. In some ways this plot felt a lot more direct than the more extended one in Dynasty Warriors 9. It’s less grand of course but Sasaki’s plot was just interesting and the whole rivalry aspect with Masashi was cool.

Overall, Samurai Warriors 2 is definitely a very good game. I’d call it a great one at that. If you have time then beating it with all of the characters would be a blast since the stories should all be fairly different. I’m far less familiar with the base story here compared to Dynasty as well so it all feels pretty fresh. It seems to take place way after most of the Sengoku Basara anime since the main kings are already gone. The new characters look fun though and I wonder if the rest of the games in this series will deal with the same era and plot like Dynasty or if we’ll be jumping around a little more here. I’m not sure when I’ll get the third game but it shouldn’t be too far in the future I would say.

Overall 8/10

Disgaea 3: Absence of Justice Review

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It’s been a little while since I played Disgaea 2, but I’ve been meaning to jump into 3 for a while now. The strategic gameplay of the series is always a blast. It really brings you in for a big challenge from start to finish that’s for sure. You have to consider a lot of angles when playing. While the core story is definitely a bit weaker than the first two, it makes for a great game either way and one that you don’t want to miss.

The game starts by introducing us to Mao. He’s the son of the Overlord and his goal is to rise to that position by destroying his father. The reason he wants to do this is because the Overlord broke his video game console a while back. To that end, Mao has decided that he will need to figure out what powers a hero since heroes usually take the Overlord down. Once he is able to figure that out then he will be ready to roll. To that end he captures a hero named Almaz and steals his title. Now, this gets a little meta and the game isn’t afraid to break the 4th wall but bear with me here. So effectively everyone has a title which actually affects how you act and think. Now that Almaz’s title has been taken he is slowly becoming a demon. He has to find a way to get into Mao’s heart (Which is located as basically a department store that you can walk into) to steal his title back. Will either of the characters get what they want?

Most of the game takes place at school or on campus as Mao tries to locate how to find a lot of power. Heroes are almost mythical in the demon world because of how rarely they appear. Everything is backwards in this world so to be an honor student you need to keep on cutting class and just being mean while the delinquents are people who attend class and are nice to others. It’s a fun dynamic and there are 3 little minions who show up in basically every chapter of the game to try and cause trouble. They’re always fun to have around for sure.

As a main character Mao is decent. He has his entertaining moments and I do like that he is always trying to set the record straight that he has no friends. The guy has a lot of secrets and a fascination with live experimentation so even by the end he isn’t a true hero. Still, he does end up fighting with the villains so you are at least glad to have him on your side at the very least. Almaz is the other main hero and he’s pretty fun. His plot is about getting Princess Sapphire to finally notice him but he is content to stay in the shadows until he works up the courage. He protects her from a distance and all. A one way romance like this can always be rough but at least the demons aren’t too hard on him about this.

Sapphire is a solid Princess though and one of the better ones of recent years. She has the brilliant idea of going to destroy the Overlord before he even thinks of kidnapping her. That’s pretty proactive so I can certainly get behind that. Princess Peach should consider capturing Bowser next time instead of waiting for the inevitable. She can fight which is always a pretty good skill to have as well. Her super strength punch and Buzzsaw even scare Mao at times.

Mao’s rival is a solid character as well. As leader of the delinquents you’d expect nothing less. One supporting character who could be annoying most of the time was the cook though. Literally all of his lines are using food lingo. I can appreciate good puns and all but I felt like he would never actually get to the point so he didn’t really serve much of a purpose at times. He gets a lot of hype and is apparently super strong but the game doesn’t do much with that concept.

As an RPG there are tons of other characters of course but those are the big ones. You’ll enjoy the story, there’s a lot going on. For the gameplay, it’s the same as in previous titles. You control up to 9 characters and maneuver them through a chess board of sorts. The idea is to take out the opponent fighters. Sometimes this will be straight forward and you just run to take them out while at other times there are a bunch of obstacles to get past. The levels become more like a puzzle as you have to decide how to attack the enemy. A good strategy is just as important as your level ups here.

The game holds nothing back so you will likely need to go replay levels a bunch before clearing the game. It’s difficult to level everyone up here since only the character who beats the enemy gets the level up this time. So by the end of the game I had 4 really strong fighters and my other guys were scrubs. It was worth it though. Then you want to save money to buy excellent equipment. The equipment will really come in handy since it boosts your stats massively. For example you can switch out your weapon with 100 attack power for one with 700 and suddenly you’re blasting through everyone. The toughest part is always choosing between buying a new weapon or new armor. I always prioritized weapons first since it makes the grinding quicker but ultimately you will need armor or you will fall. My strategy is to sell off all the equipment of all my other fighters and only stick to 4 but of course this is risky. It’s a great way to raise funds short term though.

There’s a whole lot of depth to the gameplay as you can also upgrade attacks here. Doing so makes them more powerful but drastically costs more magic meter as well so sometimes getting it too strong can actually be a bad thing. Then you can go to class to have the students give you money or unlock more levels at the shop. There is definitely a whole lot to consider here. The main story took me over 20 hours and there is a sizable post game story as well. This game can easily last you 50+ hours so there is a ton of replay value here. I would definitely recommend sticking with it

Naturally the soundtrack is also pretty solid. You’ll recognize a theme or two from the original game in addition to the new ones. Then you’ve got the solid graphics which go all out with the special attacks as always. It really knows how to make everything look really high tier. I do low key wish you could skip the cinematics on the special moves eventually since it takes up some time but I suppose after putting so much effort into the attacks they don’t want people just skipping them each time.

Overall, Disgaea 3 is a solid way to end the trilogy. The game has a lot of heart and depth to it. It’s a very complete RPG that excels in all areas. While I would say that the first two defeated it, you’ll definitely be invested in the game. It may be very difficult but you always feel like you have hope even if you need to go back and earn some more level ups again. Sometimes that’s just something you have to do. Going back to get stronger is a noble quest at all times.

Overall 8/10

One Piece Pirate Warriors 4 Review

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After playing through Dynasty Warriors I knew that it was time to get more classic beat em up games from Kemco. One Piece was the perfect follow up. It’s a terrific game through and through with extremely tight gameplay. Every aspect of the game is just flat out amazing with a top tier soundtrack, amazing graphics, etc. There’s just nothing to dislike about this game. It really delivers and is an excellent tribute to the series. I would highly recommend checking it out whether you’re just a big One Piece fan or like the gameplay in general. It’s quite polished and I definitely look forward to the day they make a 5th installment.

The game adapts 6 of the story arcs from the manga. Naturally there’s no way you could hope to adapt everything from the series so there are a number of big jumps and such as you go through the campaign. They do manage to tackle all of the big stories though such as Marineford and Wano. For the arcs that are skipped the game gives you a quick recap so you know what went on through a set of cutscenes. The campaign is a pretty solid length so there is a lot of detail here. If you list any influential One Piece scene off the top of your head, odds are that it is in this game.

Naturally the gameplay here is your typical 3D hack n slash/beat em up. You pick a character and take down hundreds of enemies as you accomplish the goals of the level which range from defeating enemies to capturing territories. To capture a territory you must beat a large number of enemies in that zone and then take out the leader. This prevents further reinforcements from that area which is a pretty great help in these battles. I always prioritize taking over the area whenever possible. You have your standard attacks, power moves, and specials. There is also a very detailed power up system where you amp your moves up. I really focused on getting Luffy and Sanji to max as their battle styles were already really good so with the extra boost to their abilities it was like cake going through the levels.

The game likely anticipated this though so throughout the game you will be forced to play as many different characters. Then you have the tricky decision of using some of your resources to power them up even though you may never play them again or try to squeak by with level 1 stats. It can be a pretty hard decision. Also one thing to keep in mind when playing as Sanji is that he can’t do much against female opponents. The game even gives you a warning message if you try to play him in a level where they show up. I ignored the warning the first time and it got tricky. Effectively you can only offer a single strike and then Sanji immediately recoils. So you can imagine that defeating an opponent will take forever when you can only land a single move like that. Without the special abilities I would have been there all day so after that I was careful when to pick him.

The power up system also allows you to learn a bunch of new moves which are handy since a lot of them are better than your starters. You can also use transformations like with Luffy activating Gear 4. It’s a really handy move to have here. In terms of pure gameplay this has to be one of the smoothest that I’ve played in a long time. I would put it even above Dynasty Warriors 9 and Hyrule Warriors 2. Both of which tried adding some new mechanics which were fun enough but Pirate Warriors 4 is going back to basics. Just take enemies down right away. I would beat up to 2500 enemies in some levels. The best attack in my opinion is Conqueror’s Haki. Using that causes many enemies to instantly die and it also ignores any shields the enemy may have up. What can beat that?

Then you’ve also got an amazing soundtrack in this game. Pretty much every tune is amazing. I’ve been listening to the tunes online after playing through the game quite a lot. There may not be a ton of different tracks as I only see around 15 online but they are all just pretty amazing. You can feel the energy in each one of them and they really make you want to jump in and get on the action. You’ve got suitably emotional tracks as well. This has to be one of the most complete soundtracks I’ve heard in a minute. Naturally the graphics for the game are also quite good. The characters are striking and same for the various landscapes which are all unique and pretty accurate to the manga/show.

In terms of replay value there is definitely a whole lot to get through here. Aside from the main story you can also play a lot of stand alone adventures in the Treasure log and experiment with all of the characters. Obtaining the Platinum Trophy will also take a very long time. Right now you can get this game for under 30 so it’s definitely a steal. You won’t run out of things to do in this game for a very long time. The main campaign alone would justify the purchase so with all of that extra content you’re definitely good to go.

Overall, The only thing I could say that isn’t positive about the game is that for their original ending to the Wano arc it was pretty uninspired. I wasn’t a big fan since it felt like more of a cop out than anything. Otherwise everything about this game is just incredible. You’ve got a top tier soundtrack, graphics, gameplay, and story. You would struggle to find another game in this genre with smoother gameplay than Pirate Warriors 4. It’s all just so clean and polished that you can’t help but get sucked in to the adventure. You definitely don’t want to miss out on this one. I intend to play some more beat em up games like this in the very near future so definitely be on the lookout for that. It’s going to be a blast!

Overall 9/10

Thunderball Review

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Agent 007 returns in this next caper and SPECTRE has a very active role here. Right from the start they’re holding whole countries hostage which is pretty impressive. I suppose when you’ve stolen a nuke this is just the kind of thing you can quickly get away with. Thunderball decides to have a whole lot of ocean scenes which unfortunately don’t work nearly as well as land ones. At the end of the day you just need solid ground to get that crispy choreography you want for the battles. Thunderball’s a pretty standard Bond film I would say, it brings in about what you would expect from the series.

After SPECTRE issues their demands we cut away to Bond enjoying a nice vacation as usual. The guy seems to have an awful lot of vacations if you think about it, but he is in the business of saving the world so I suppose it makes sense. Well, the resort is awful shady and his life gets threatened multiple times before he is pulled out. M tasks him with finding a lead and Bond remembers the murder event at the hotel and quickly gets on the case. He doesn’t have a whole lot of time to find out where the bombs are as well as the villain base before the government will ultimately have to meet SPECTRE’s demands.

I have to say that right from the start Bond doesn’t look amazing here though. For starters, while he is at the resort he notices numerous times that shady things are going on. People skulking about, going into his room, etc. Yet when it’s hit time for the stretcher exercise he eagerly gets into the machine that has his arms and legs bound. Naturally a villain shows up but instead of murdering Bond he just puts the machine on high intensity so the nurse arrives later and saves him. Keep in mind that we were barely 10 minutes into the film and Bond should have already been murdered. It’s not really a great look for the guy. My idea here is that Bond’s continued success continues to raise his ego higher and higher to the point where he no longer bothers with being cautious. Why be cautious if you always end up winning right?

Well, either way the main chunk of the film takes place in the Bahamas as Bond very quickly figures out that the big villain behind this plan is a man named Largo. The guy isn’t exactly subtle about it though so Bond enjoys humiliating the guy by beating him at cards and dancing with his girl Domino. Bond loves to troll the villains like this but it always ends up with his friends being murdered so was it really worth it? For example, in this case Bond is accompanied by a few other agents. I forget their names, but naturally the girl gets kidnapped and it doesn’t end well while things don’t go very well for the guys either.

You can always expect Bond to be the last man standing in these things but then maybe he shouldn’t be so obvious about his trolling attempts. As always he has a ton of affairs in this film. He throws himself at everyone the whole time so even when you get the emotional ending scenes it’s hard to actually buy into it because you know Bond will be going to the next girl as soon as possible. As always we do have some fun scenes with M and Moneypenny as they both try to keep him on the straight and narrow. M always tends to get the best lines in these things as he reminds Bond of who is in charge here. I’d like to see him get a bigger role one of these days although in a way the small roles help portray him as being fairly invincible as he never gets into the line of fire.

I wasn’t a big fan of Domino here so between her and Bond that means that both of the main characters weren’t great. I feel like it took a while for her to put the pieces together of what happened to her brother. It’s also an example of her not really caring that she was on the wrong side until things got personal so you couldn’t really call her a hero either. She was just content doing her own thing. She does have a good moment at the end of the film though which was a solid conclusion to her subplot. She should definitely be upset with Bond though for giving her such a loud radiation sensor. He had to have known that he was basically selling her life away by giving her that but still gave it to her anyway.

This film is pretty long. I wouldn’t say it really drags on though. The Bond films are pretty good at making sure something is always happening. As mentioned though, I’m not a big fan of the underwater scenes though. The water hampers all of the movements so it’s like the characters are fighting in slow motion most of the time so not much gets done. I much prefer the quick land moments like Bond taking people out at the resort or when he tried to rescue one of the hostages. The scenes on land are just a lot more tense and make for good fights.

As always the film has its issues with the poorly developed romances and tons of fanservice. The beach setting doesn’t really help its case either since you know the film was very intentional about the selection. As long as the movies continue to focus on this I feel like there’s only so far the movies can go. They won’t be able to catch up to the rival franchises either. At least we still have the classic Bond theme so that helps with the soundtrack but you can already tell that it is appearing less and less. Once it stops altogether that will definitely be a pretty sad day. You really need that to complete the experience.

Overall, Thunderball is a pretty standard Bond film. From the early ones I’ve seen so far I would say it is one of the better ones even if it’s almost a by default kind of thing. I do have to say that the opening henchmen who tried to defy SPECTRE is probably one of the least intelligent villains I’ve ever seen. Why would you try to swindle money out of an organization with thousands of members involved in over 100 countries that can murder you in any which way? He was literally a part of the plan where they murdered a bunch of people and assumed their identities. He can blackmail them but they can always just pretend to give him what he wants and murder him the next day. There’s no possible way this would have ended well for the guy so you’re almost rolling your eyes when he asks for the money and confidently starts to walk away. It’s humorous in a sense though. So if you like the Bond films then I’d recommend this one even if just to see how Bond’s lucky streak gets him out of jams this time. Otherwise you’re better off giving it a skip.

Overall 4/10

The Beast with Five Fingers Review

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When you get a film with a name like this you’re definitely going in expecting a certain kind of cinematic experience. A giant monster running around or a guy who played with science a little too much and ended up transforming into something truly fantastic. It’s a tried and true formula that always results in a fun experience. Unfortunately this film decided to go away from that format quite a bit. I think the other angle could have been more interesting but this mystery does keep your attention very well so I would still call it a pretty good movie.

The movie starts by showing us Bruce scam a few tourists as he makes a few bucks. He then heads back to the mansion of Francis who used to be excellent at playing the piano but hasn’t had a lot of inspiration to do so after his accident which left him crippled. He is close to death and has all of his closest allies witness him signing the Will. He then falls down a flight of stairs and dies. His only two relatives immediately show up since they expect to be named in the will but instead Francis has given all of the money and his estate to Julie. The relatives decide they have to find a way to void the will but Hillary is thrilled because this means he can continue to study the stars. Unfortunately, a mysterious hand appears and murders the local attorney. It would appear that Francis may not be completely dead quite yet.

This is a classic murder mystery as a mysterious hand goes around murdering people and the characters have to find a way to stop it. The issue is that Hillary can’t seem to convince anyone that the hand is real which presents an issue. The local cop does a fingerprint test and the only print showing up on the murders belongs to Francis..but he died a long time ago. What could this mean!!!? One thing’s for sure, the characters are going to have to keep up their guard at all times. Still, what can a hand do right? Usually that would be your reaction but Francis was shown to be quite strong. In one of the scenes that played before he died, Francis started to choke Hillary even while on his wheelchair and would have slain the guy if Julie hadn’t shown up. Francis was definitely strong for his age and that was a pretty powerful scene that you would not soon forget.

Hillary makes for a very interesting character. He certainly pops out at you the instant he appears. The guy is quite possessive of his books and also likes causing trouble with everyone so he’s definitely not here to make friends. Still, he does add a level of chaos to everything which is always appreciated as shaking things up can be nice. He starts to go off the deep end to an extent by the end though and you’ll be shaking your head at his scenes. The guy has a flair for the dramatic to be sure.

Julie’s a solid heroine. She may have started to get intimidated in the second half but she did stay strong for the most part and I’m glad that she didn’t hand the building off to the relatives initially. That’s a ton of money to keep and it’s not like they were going to give her any part of it if the situation had been reversed. She also does her best to help her friends out but takes some huge risks in the end that weren’t very smart. Then there’s Bruce who is effectively the main character although his role gets smaller in the second half. He’s pretty good at scamming people all the time to earn money so he’s not exactly a hero. I thought he would take a more pro active role in trying to find the hand but he was more amused than anything during the course of the film. The whole thing felt like a game to him.

We can’t forget the Commissario who had a nice role here. He was pretty quick to try and help solve this case. He may not have been able to do much against the hand but it’s always reassuring having a cop in the building here. At the very least it’ll slow down the body count. The body count here was actually quite small so the Hand didn’t make for the most impressive horror villain out there. I suppose a small body count is better than no body count though right? It’s a start at least.

I do think that the film ended a little weakly though. For starters I didn’t like Julie’s final decision as the relatives get too sweet a deal here. They definitely didn’t earn this in the slightest and I would have preferred some kind of big sale instead. That would have made a lot more sense. Additionally, the film ends off with a few different jump scares in a row with a bunch of fake outs. I don’t think that was the most effective way to go about things. The character even started to break the fourth wall which really came out of nowhere. The ending just didn’t mesh well with the rest of the film at all so it comes off as being a little forced with nothing to do with anything. Maybe the film figured it needed some levity because things were getting too serious?

Overall, I would have taken this film in a different direction but it’s a quality title nonetheless. The writing is on point which is always important as all the characters sound very distinguished even when debating each other. They’re all looking to get the upper hand here so you definitely can’t trust anyone and in a way you could say that is how this should be. Every character is always looking to manipulate someone else so why would you trust them in the first place? At the very least you shouldn’t try to talk to any of the characters alone at night when there are no witnesses. I’d still recommend this movie though as it’s a very complete film which is strong in all areas. If it ever got a sequel I’m sure there would be some potential there.

Overall 7/10

Marnie Review

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Marnie is the kind of film that sneaks up on you. By all accounts it should be a pretty decent film as it was made a long time ago and has the classic writing/witty dialogue that you would expect to see here. Unfortunately it makes a number of key mistakes which ultimately doom it to not just being a bad film, but a horrible one all around. There’s certainly no reason to check this out so I would recommend giving it a hard skip.

The movie starts with Marnie swindling another business out of a lot of money. She enjoys going around and stealing money whenever she can which she then gives to her mother Bernice who suffered a major accident a while back and needs the support. Marnie’s next target is another big company led by Mark. What she doesn’t know is that he is one of the people who saw her at the last job so it isn’t hard for him to catch her. His terms are that he won’t report her to the police if she marries him so they get married but she is determined to make this difficult on him.

Everything goes straight down from there quite drastically. For starters we get a pretty random plot with her horse where it shows up but missed the jump and gets injured. Marnie has to put him down which shot a hole through the film’s chances of survival. The horse seems like he was added in just to be blown up which was a bad move. There was just no reason to do this. The film already had enough issues but at the end of the day this does tie into the film’s core problem which is trying to add too much information and backstory. We really don’t need to know any of this stuff for a solid mystery but the film insists on giving everyone an origin story or an extra detail.

Take Lil who is the main villain here. She’s trying to win Mark away from Marnie and it would be the usual love triangle except for one fact which changes everything. She’s Mark’s sister in law. So that basically throws the whole plot out because it’s just an awful storyline to even include in the film. Why did we need to add this extra information to her character? If she was the childhood friend or something it’s be cliché but at least would work a lot better than this variation. It’s too bad because she is easily the most entertaining character of the bunch and I dare say the smartest as well.

Then you have Beatrice and her whole backstory. Naturally it’s tragic to fit in with the rest of the film as she was in a dicey business and getting out took a lot of effort and turned into a whole conspiracy. Where the whole thing ends poorly is that suddenly she is unable to love her daughter anymore and I have a hard time buying into that. Does she sub consciously blame her for what happened or she’s just been completely traumatized from physical touch after the incident? Either way I don’t see how this would totally be blocking her from at least showing some more kindness towards Marnie.

Of course we can’t end there. Then you’ve got Marnie’s phobia of the color red as well as physical contact. This also transfers over to storms as well so she has a phobia of quite a lot of things by the time the film is through with her. We have a rather painful scene where she absolutely refuses to be touched but Mark had enough of this subplot by then and forced the issue. I don’t see why this part of the phobia had to be added and it couldn’t just stick to the color red. Having the phobia evolve with the film’s loose explanation of she was faking it all during the first act was definitely very weak.

Marnie gives Mark a tough time throughout the movie though as she struggles at every turn and never makes any effort to change. While the scenes can have good banter at times, the film never changes things up so a lot of the dialogue remains the same with slight variations. Then you have Mark who isn’t exactly a hero either as his main goal was to marry Marnie from the start so he effectively allowed her plans to progress until he could make use of them. He does what he can to rehabilitate her for most of the film but ultimately wasn’t able to stick the landing such as the boat scene.

This film does have some of the typical thriller aspects like having one person from Marnie’s past show up to start stirring up some trouble. I was glad for at least some quick stakes here because the film needed something. It’s just a shame that it couldn’t focus on this plot a little more and just throw the other ones out. That would have gone a long way towards improving the movie without a doubt. The main issue is really just the writing as it relies on a whole lot of shock value to keep the film going. That’s always a sign of poor writing because it means they were not confident enough in the script to get people watching towards the end without such big scenes.

Overall, Marnie is a film I would highly recommend staying away from. All of the plots are pretty bad here so the film never really gives you a chance to just sit down and enjoy the scenes at hand. It’s always throwing more shock value at you which definitely destroys any chance of the movie actually turning into a quality experience. It’s a shame because at the very least the premise of a thief going around robbing a bunch of people with the boss knowing about it could be fun. This just won’t be the title that actually puts that kind of storyline on the map.

Overall 0/10

Gilda Review

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Gilda is a Noir film from a while back. It’s definitely got every noir element you can ask for and makes for a pretty interesting film although the main character is definitely pretty bad. Definitely not someone you can trust in the slightest and there’s a lot of twists and turns here as the characters mess with each other. The main takeaway is that you shouldn’t get involved with gambling as things tend to get dicey.

The movie starts with a confident guy named Johnny cheating a bunch of sailors at cards and running off with all of their money. He doesn’t get far though as someone holds him at gunpoint and Johnny realizes that it may be curtains for him. That’s when a guy named Ballin shows up and rescues Johnny. Ballin is the owner of a local casino and so naturally Johnny repays this kindness by going to that guy’s casino and stealing a bunch of money. He’s caught again but Ballin decides to make him a partner. Johnny is surprisingly loyal and so the two get along really well. This all changes when Ballin goes on vacation and returns with a new wife named Gilda. Johnny and Gilda have quite the history between them which leads to a lot of friction. Gilda is a free spirit who flirts with everyone so Johnny tries to keep Ballin from finding this out. Will Johnny and Gilda’s feud end up destroying the casino?

At first things are going almost too well so you know something’s got to give. Johnny and Ballin have perfect teamwork with each other and the casino is doing better than never. They’re really on cloud 9 and Johnny’s enjoying his new lease on life. As someone who used to cheat a whole lot it makes sense that he would be good at noticing if others were using the same tricks. That said, things all fall to pieces when Gilda shows up. She is intentionally difficult a lot of the time as well as she puts him into tough situations that are hard to explain.

I would make the case that if he was straight with Ballin from the start instead of making up stories then it would have been easier. By the midway point that isn’t an option anymore though as Ballin starts to act rather dangerously. Perhaps Johnny knew that would be his reaction all the while. Johnny was really solid in the first half of the film but then he looked really bad later on. His punishment scheme involving marriage started off as incredibly petty and by the end just turned flat-out villainous. There isn’t any real way to root for him as he went completely off the deep end.

Then you have Gilda who isn’t a very good heroine. She admits to being someone who goes on the rebound all the time. While the characters do ultimately say she never actually cheated on the leads, it’s hard to really believe that given her actions. She actually did cheat on Ballin while they were still married with Johnny and she was already getting into a serious affair with someone overseas until it turned out that he was actually an inside agent. The common theme in both of these instances is that she was really quick to move on so it’s hard to imagine any real romance sticking around for the long-haul by the end. Without trust you can’t possibly have a healthy relationship after all.

The romance in the film in general is just really weak and takes away from the more interesting thriller aspects of the story. You’re interested in the conspiracies and the truth behind the casino. Not in what’s going on between Johnny and Gilda. That’s the kind of stuff you can just leave for a side story or just to the imagination but it ends up playing quite the central focus by the end.

There are two main supporting characters in Pio and Obregon. Pio is a nice janitor type character who completes all of the odd jobs around the Casino. He’s been around for a long time and is always completely confident in himself. Nobody can scare this guy and that’s because he knows just about everything. You can always count on him in crunch time and he was just fun. Then you’ve got Obregon who appears for a lot of the movie. He’s a mysterious character who is always hanging around the scene of the crime just doing his own thing. There are naturally twists around his character and they are handled quite well. He may even be the best character in the film when you think about it.

Finally you’ve got the main villain Ballin and he definitely messes up what was a pretty good system for him. He really had everything he could have wanted and then ended up messing it all up by going after Gilda when he shouldn’t have. If he had just stayed strong or not gotten married so impulsively then he would have been okay. While the guy went crazy by the end, he may have been distracted by success long enough for that not to take effect. It’s quite the coincidence that he ended up meeting up with Gilda of all people.

As with any classic Noir film the writing is important and I would say it is pretty solid here. The banter with Johnny and Ballin is always solid with a lot of subtle jabs thrown in. Johnny has a quick word for anyone who gets in his way. The only time the interactions aren’t as solid is with him and Gilda as you can see the romance coming a mile away so their tough talk just doesn’t work as well. Beyond that the whole film is definitely interesting from start to finish and the pacing means that it all goes through pretty smoothly. There’s never a point in the film where you feel like it’s dragging on.

Overall, Gilda is a solid Noir film. I wouldn’t put it as one of my all time high picks in the genre but it holds up well enough. Gilda is the weakest element of the film to be sure along with the rather weak romance here but the plots about the casino and such are solid. There’s always something going on here and definitely a lot to unpack. All of the characters could have handled the situation differently and would have been in a better spot for it except for Obregon who handled everything well from start to finish. That guy was always a step ahead of the rest. With a solid ending to close things out, I’d definitely recommend Gilda if you want to check out a classic film with a little mystery and intrigue.

Overall 6/10

Goldfinger Review

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Bond is at it again with this next installment but is the film going to go to the next level here or will this be about on the level as the first two. It’s definitely a movie that retains a lot of the same issues as the earlier titles. The action scenes are fun though but Bond certainly gets punked a whole lot. Again, how is this guy the best agent that M16 has got? It feels like he mostly just relies on luck in all of his appearances and that’s not a good strategy that’ll work long-term.

Well, the movie starts with Bond blowing up a facility and basically showing the audience that 007 is back! Bond heads to a resort for vacation but the worst fear of every person on vacation happens…his boss shows up. The agent tells Bond that he is to investigate and monitor an infamous villain known as Goldfinger. The guy stays at this very resort and loves cheating people out of their money. Bond is pretty confident that he can beat anyone up so he promptly begins trolling Goldfinger by stealing his girl, making fun of him, and then cheating the guy out of a bunch of money. Naturally this leads to Goldfinger murdering the girl and beating Bond up multiple times. Bond wants revenge now but will he be able to stop Goldfinger in this frenzied state or is he on a one way trip to oblivion?

This film really highlights the issue with Bond’s overconfidence. It just doesn’t feel earned since each time it causes him to lose or his friends to get murdered. The girl from the opening scene is a big example of this. Bond basically threw her life away by antagonizing Goldfinger and not giving her any kind of protection after that. What did he really expect was going to happen here? As a special agent you need to be confident in yourself. Absolutely, that’s a true statement but there are limits to this. It’s like how Iron Man dared Mandarin to try and attack him in Iron Man 3 and was surprised when the guy did or even a random thug mocking Accelerator and saying he wouldn’t dare shoot her only to find out that he actually would. If you’re going to test someone you should be prepared for retaliation.

So Bond is no better in this film than in the last few. Not only is he very weak but of course he is distracted by every lady in the film and has a number of affairs as normal. I’m okay with him getting extra emotional for this one. While some may say this isn’t very professional of him, he knows very well that the situation is his fault and should want to avenge the girl. It just makes all of his losses in this film sting all the more. He still has his more charismatic moments of course and can be a fun lead to follow but not a likable one.

Unfortunately Goldfinger is definitely the worst main villain so far. The guy can’t really fight all that well and just relies on the fact that he can always outwit Bond. His final plan only gets so far out of pure luck. I have a very hard time believing he would be able to shoot down over 10 Army fighters on his own and then escape for a third time. That whole sequence will have you shaking your head. Keep in mind that the army went in knowing that there had been a hostile takeover at this point. Should be on full alert….

His main minion Oddjob was really good though and definitely a standout character. He’s actually very skilled. First off, the steel hat is a genius invention because you can wear it very discreetly and then toss it when you need to take someone down. The villains clearly have their own Q who can make some solid items. He’s also not a one trick pony as he was able to fight really well even without the hat. I wasn’t surprised that he was a lot stronger than Bond either as we never see the agent training while this guy was clearly devoted to his craft. That’s a lot of shots at Bond eh? I’ll give him a break til the end now.

Galore is the main heroine in this film and I’ll give her some points for being able to fight. In fact she even defeated 007 on multiple occasions. It’s definitely nice to have hand to hand skills and even better to have that coupled with a gun. At that point there just isn’t much you can do if she has the proper angle. Galore does really well in this film even if ultimately you know that some romance will be appearing at some point.

As always this is where the Bond film falters. There’s a ton of random affairs in the film. Even the opening credits are pretty painful here as it focuses on a ton of suggestive imagery the whole time. From the posters and such you can see exactly how the film was advertising itself and this did not change with this film. It makes all of the usual mistakes here and just makes you shake your head at how predictable it is, but also at how much better it could have been without that.

The movie’s about on par with the last two. I would argue it’s a tad bit better than the opening 3 but not by enough to really make much of a difference. Hopefully as the films go on Bond will look a little better but at this point I’m rather doubtful. Usually you have the lead look his best in the opening films before having him lose more in the sequels since it shows how the villains are getting more powerful. So if he is already getting crushed here then that really does not bode well for him.

Overall, Goldfinger continues to show why the James Bond films aren’t in the same league as Mission Impossible or Jason Bourne. Those titles really focus on the special agent aspect of the plot as the primary focus while this one seems to have that as the backdrop at times while Bond’s charms are the main focus. He’s just thrown off his game so often it gets pretty crazy. The film does flow by as the pacing is good and I would also say the writing is on point. It’s mainly just held back by Bond himself and the fanservice. The fact that Goldfinger is not only a sub par villain but a flat out bad one doesn’t help matters either. We’ll see if the next film is able to overtake this one.

Overall 4/10